Souls and Spirits
by apriiil
Summary: Everything seems to fall into place when the right person comes into your life. That was what Bickslow realised, anyway, but if it hadn't been for them getting paired up for a job together, he never would have realised that Lucy was that right person who would light up his world in ways he never thought possible.
1. Chapter 1

"You're staring."

"What?" he asked, blinking a few times with his unfortunate return to reality.

"You were staring at Blondie," the blond replied with a slight chuckle.

"I was not," Bickslow mumbled. "I was… staring at… Natsu," he lied. The fact that he had indeed been staring at Blondie – or Cosplayer, as he liked to call her – was something he would definitely not admit to Laxus. The whole Natsu story he could pull off… Or so he thought.

"Well then, I wasn't aware you swung that way," Laxus laughed. He knew he wasn't actually staring at Natsu, but he had decided to go along with it, just to see what his friend could come up with.

Bickslow's scowl was evident under his visor, partly because it only covered the top half of his face, and whenever he didn't have his tongue sticking out with a wide grin or if he was just showing no emotion it all, it was a scowl. "That's not what I mean, you ass." He thought for a moment before continuing with his well-thought lie, "He's always going on about he wants someone to fight him, and I was considering if it was worth wasting my time on him." _That was believable… Right?_

Laxus almost burst out laughing yet again. His friend was not the most creative when it came to lying. "Yeah, nice try. So why were you staring at Blondie?" he asked.

Bickslow was stumped. He should have figured out the Dragon Slayer would see right through it. Since he couldn't use Natsu, he decided to just embrace his inner – or not so inner, as everyone knew – pervert. "Have you seen the stuff she wears, dude? How can I not stare?" He finished with his signature grin, complete with his tongue hanging from his mouth with his Fairy Tail mark visible for everyone to see (or anyone who happened to look over to their table). When Laxus scoffed quietly, he went back to staring at her.

* * *

Lucy sat at her table with the rest of Team Natsu. She watched Natsu and Gray insulting each other and Gray subconsciously strip down, with both of them showing their respective elements on their hands. She wondered what would get destroyed from today's fight. She looked around at her friends and guild mates – family – happily. Erza sitting to her right smiling to herself before she had to go in and break up the fight before someone caught on fire or was surrounded by ice. She noticed Levy in a corner with her nose in a book, and all she could see was the top of her blue hair. Jet and Droy stood just behind her as usual. Gajeel was sitting in a dark corner eating some metal while talking to Pantherlily. She continued gazing around her guild when all she could hear from the bar was a very loud Elfman saying that Mira's stew from today was a man, and she smiled to herself.

This was her home, and she was glad that she was a part of the infamous Fairy Tail, despite its reputation for destroying things over the years. Most of all, she could say she loved everyone in the guild… give or take a few people.

"Quit it out!" Erza shouted from between Natsu and Gray. A few chuckles could be heard in the now silent guildhall, where most people just turned back around and went back to doing what they were originally doing. At the bar, Mira was looking over some request forms while having a very one-sided conversation with Cana who was slumped over the bar with her keg of the day.

"There's just too many jobs to do at the moment, and no one is doing any!" Mira exclaimed while frantically trying to think of who could do what, if anything at all.

"Why don't I let the cards decide teams and force everyone to go?" Cana mumbled into the bar top. "It will be good for everyone to go and do something to for once. It's too loud in here with all the shouting."

Mira thought for a moment before she went on. Last time they let Cana do a divination, she was being controlled and the teams had been… less than favourable. "Cana… remember what happened last time we tried that?"

Cana threw her hand up to dismiss her thought before she let it fall back down with a thud. "Yes, yes, I know. It was just a thought, anyway."

Suddenly Makarov chimed in from his place on the bar, "Just let her do it. We need some fun around here, and this should mix it up." He chuckled at himself before going back to the mug in his hand. Mira seriously wondered who would win between Cana and Makarov if they ever had a drinking contest, and she shuddered at the thought of what would actually happen.

She was pulled from her somewhat horrific daydream though when Makarov suddenly spoke again. "Listen up, you brats!" Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to the bar at the guild master's loud and sudden announcement. Gray and Natsu were mid-fight again and were now almost in suspended animation, waiting for what their guild master was wanting to say. "It's time for you to all go and earn some jewels and do some jobs for once." He looked around at the shocked faces of all of his children. He enjoyed it, to say the least. "And since none of you want to do it within your own little teams, we'll let our resident drunk-"

"Hey!" Cana half mumbled and shouted from her position, along with a few laughs from the others in the guild.

"As I was saying, Cana – _our resident Card-magic user_ – will be the one to choose the teams, and whether they be fortunate or not, _you will be going_."

Various shouts came from the members of the guild – most remembered her last try at this, and were not fond of the same result.

Cana and Mira were standing over by the map of Fiore, with the requests all stuck to various locations on the map. Mira stood with a smile on her face, as usual, and Cana stood staring at the map with her cards in hand. _I can't screw this up_ , the brunette thought. Most of the guild had gathered around them, curious as to see who would be going out on jobs and with who, yet the Raijinshuu sat down the other end of the guildhall, with Laxus using his sound pod, seemingly ignoring everything.

"Are you ready, Cana?" Mira asked, and Cana nodded.

"Alright, let's begin! And remember, no swapsies!" Makarov grinned. He knew there would be a few people who wouldn't be fond of going with their usual teams, but that made it all the more fun to him.

Cana suddenly opened her eyes and threw her cards towards the map at lightning speed, most in groups of two or three. She looked at the map again, now featuring her cards. _Please don't screw this up_ , she thought again.

"Well then, let the fun begin!" Makarov received the first request and the two cards from Mira. He laughed loudly when he saw the pairing, only to be greeted by questioning gazes. "Gray and Natsu!"

"Wha-?" They both muttered at the same time.

"You heard the man, Flame-brain." Gray said. As much as he hated working with Natsu, they were both strong, since they were members of Fairy Tail's Strongest Team, or Team Natsu as most liked to put it, and even though he didn't like admitting it, they somehow worked well together. Well, sometimes.

"Why do I get stuck with Popsicle?!" Natsu was furious, to say the least.

"You'll be heading to a neighbouring town to sort out their problem with some lingering bandits and destroy their hideout, and I know that you'll be able to handle _that_ part of the job."

"Yeah, well…" Natsu mumbled, with his hand behind his head and his signature grin on his face. Gray smirked. If it was destroying something, then they could definitely do it.

Mira handed the next request and cards to Makarov again. "Alright, next up we have…" He looked over the cards and skimmed the request, then said, "Freed, Evergreen, and… Elfman?" Mira giggled from her place next to the board, and gasps stemmed from multiple guild members. Evergreen was a shade of light pink, and Freed was a shade of an even darker pink just from the thought of being caught between the Fairy and the Man.

"Team is a man!" Elfman proclaimed as he stood up from where he sat, his fist up in the air. Evergreen didn't take too lightly to being called a man, and so her various cries let everyone know of her feelings for it. It eventually quieted down after Evergreen and Elfman had finished arguing, and Makarov motioned to Mira for the next pairing.

"Alzack and Bisca! No surprises there." Various cheers erupted from the guild, as usual. They were a lively bunch, after all. "Looks like you two will be acting as lookouts for a small bank while they get their security lacrimas installed. Seems easy enough." The two nodded. It wasn't something they hadn't done before, and they rarely ran into trouble on such jobs.

Slowly, the majority of the guild had received jobs. Some of the pairings were a bit strange, like Gajeel and Laxus – Bickslow wondered who would die first – and others were more expected, like Team Shadow Gear, or Erza going off on her own. Whether she stayed on her own for the entire job was a different story.

Bickslow twisted on the bench to look around the guildhall once again. Freed was trying to convince Makarov to let him trade places with Gajeel, Erza sat eating cake, Gray and Natsu were hurling even more insults before it was time to leave; and Lucy was… _Wait, who was Lucy paired with?_ And then he realised that there were still more jobs being assigned.

Makarov and Mira looked at each other before the fourth master proceeded with announcing the mystery pair in his hand. It was bad enough that the undoubtedly two strongest teams in Fairy Tail had been split up. But that… That was something else, and it was going to be interesting. The job itself was simple, but it was the pairing. The guild members were getting impatient, and many were still waiting for their assigned teams or partners for their jobs.

"Just spit it out, Gramps! I want to go already!" Natsu whined, trying to hurry it along. He didn't like trains, but he wanted to get it over and done with, and that meant leaving as soon as everything in the guild was done and he wasn't at risk of getting squashed by a giant fist from attempting to leave early.

"Shut it, Flame-breath!" Gray yelld, starting another round of fighting for the two.

"Yes, alright, you brats," Makarov sighed. He shot a look at Cana who was now half asleep over a barrel. Now wasn't the time for her to screw up, but that being said, he trusted the guild's drunk, and so he finished stalling and read out the pairing. "Ah… Bickslow and Lucy!" The guild was silent for what felt like the first time in a very long while. Bickslow had just about fallen from the bench at his table, apparently pulled from whatever land he had been in, and Lucy had been about to take a sip from her drink which was now just held in her hand as she was too shocked to move. Multiple gasps came from across the guild, all equally as confused as the other.

"But… Wouldn't they work better if they were with the Raijinshuu or Team Natsu?" Wendy asked. She had nothing against the Seith mage, but she had been with the guild long enough to know that certain teams worked well together, and those two teams were forces to be reckoned with, especially when they weren't split up.

"Perhaps, Wendy, but rules are rules, and the job is simple enough anyway. I'm sure everything will be fine," Makarov responded before turning to Bickslow. "And I promise there's no cows anywhere near the location, Bickslow," he chuckled, to which the Seith mage only scowled under his visor.

* * *

"You and Blondie, hey?" Laxus asked. He had come back from the bar with drinks in each hand, sliding one across the table to his friend before taking a seat opposite him.

"What about it?" he asked, taking a drink from the cup. Bickslow could see Laxus watching him curiously, considering the man was basically staring at him from the other side of the table.

"It's weird." Laxus shrugged, though Bickslow couldn't really see how it was weird. Hell, he'd been out on jobs with a fair amount of people in the guild. Sure, the vast majority of those jobs were with his team and Laxus, but if he could survive getting bombarded with cows, then he could survive a day or so with the Celestial Spirit mage.

"Yeah, well, even if you say it's weird now, Loke will probably make a point of being there the entire time. I still don't think he's quite gotten over the Fantasia thing…" he mumbled and looked down at the table. None of them had quite forgiven themselves for that day. Sure, the guild had forgiven them, and Laxus was back in Fairy Tail, but they still couldn't get over it themselves. He shook his head, ignoring the past – since it was the past, after all – and finished his drink, slamming it down on the table to receive a questionable glance from Laxus. "As much as I'd love to stay and chat, I think they're done, so I'm out! I have a job to go do with Cosplayer!" He flashed his usual grin and began to walk towards Mira to get the details of the job.

"Don't have too much fun," Laxus called before the man had completely walked away. Bickslow turned his shoulder to face the blonde Dragon Slayer, his grin still on his face.

"You know I will."

* * *

Many members of the guild had gathered around the bar where Makarov was sitting. Mira was smiling as usual while she handed people large mugs or plates of food. Others were walking around the hall, trying to find their new partners. Bickslow made his way through the crowd and headed towards the bar. He was about to ask Mira for the job flyer when he heard someone call his name from just behind him. He turned around to see Lucy making his way towards him with a piece of paper in her hand. He looked down at her as she now stood in front of him. _Has she always been this short?_ "Hey, Cosplayer," He greeted her with his usual wide grin.

"I'm not a Cosplayer!" she insisted, her cheeks now a light shade of pink. She had mostly given up on trying to correct him at this point. There were worse nicknames out there, after all, so she just had to be grateful that this was a bearable one, for the most part. "So… When did you want to leave for this job then? I was thinking we could leave tomorrow morning so we'd have the entire day for it instead of having to find a hotel or something."

Bickslow shrugged. "That's fine. I'm guessing it's not in Magnolia, so how about we meet at the train station at about 7?"

"That sounds fine, so I guess I'll see you then?" It was hard to tell what kind of reaction he had to things considering half of his face was covered most of the time.

"I guess you will." Bickslow began to turn to start walking back to where Laxus sat. "See you tomorrow, Cosplayer," he called over his shoulder before he got too far away, his tongue rolling out of his mouth with a grin in his usual fashion. Lucy nodded and turned to walk back to where her team sat.

Lucy sat down at her table as Bickslow left. Gray and Natsu had apparently left in her absence from the table, and Erza was now talking to Wendy who had made her way over.

"You can always come with me, if you'd like. I'm sure master won't mind," Erza said before taking a bite of her strawberry cake.

"No, no, it's fine. I'm sure there was a reason I wasn't put in any teams for these jobs," Wendy sighed, trying to hide her obvious disappointment with the team selection.

"Nonsense! You are coming with me." Erza stood, putting her hand on Wendy's arm and pulling her up (maybe a little too roughly) and began walking over to Makarov to inform him of the new team arrangements, leaving Lucy alone at the table.

She looked around the hall for a moment, noticing that it was slowly becoming less and less full. A lot of the teams had already left for their jobs. With that she pushed herself up from where she sat and headed for the doors. It was now late afternoon, so she decided to just head home and get ready for the next day.

* * *

Freed had a scowl on his face as he sat next to Laxus and opposite Bickslow. The man was definitely not looking forward to being the third wheel to Elfman and Evergreen.

"Come on, it won't be that bad," Bickslow said with a slight smile. He knew it was going to be torture for him, but he had to try and cheer him up.

"Yes, it will," Freed insisted. "Anyway, I must go prepare. If I don't return… I fear Ever has most likely turned me to stone and pushed me off a cliff." He shuddered at the thought as Bickslow chuckled and Laxus made a noise that half resembled a laugh. They'd each had their moments where they'd feared Evergreen.

Bickslow and Laxus sat in silence for a while after that. Bickslow was looking down at his now almost empty mug, and Laxus was in what appeared to be an intense staring contest with his grandfather. "Do you know what kind of job you and Blondie are going on?"

Bickslow looked up to find Laxus now looking at him. "No clue. I heard it was simple, so I don't think it really matters," Bickslow answered. A job is a job. He rarely chose the ones the Raijinshuu went on with Laxus, so he was more or less just along for the ride. "What about you and Gajeel?"

"Something about some assassins. It's not too far away so we're taking the last train out tonight so I'll be back at some point tomorrow."

Bickslow looked down at his mug again before picking it up and downing the rest in one quick gulp. "Well, try not to set an entire forest on fire with your lightning this time, and… Try not to fry Gajeel." He slid from the middle of the bench to the end and was now standing, looking down at Laxus.

"No promises."

"Of course." The two had slight smirks, and Bickslow sighed and said, "Well, I'm out. See you later, then." He put his hand up and waved behind him as he walked towards the door, and he was only then realising that he was starting to feel a little bit nervous about working with the blonde Celestial Spirit mage. _Maybe it's just because I haven't worked with her before? Yeah… It has to be_. He shook his head and continued walking home with the babies following behind him.

* * *

 ** _Notes:_** _So, I'm deleting a lot of these notes at the beginning/ends of chapters as I'm updating and revising the chapters. Most of them are irrelevant now, and it's not like anyone enjoys reading A/Ns anyway. :P_  
 _But basically, I'm just fixing up A LOT of my mistakes and errors in these early chapters, so if you're a new reader, lucky you! (I think. Maybe.)_

 _Regardless, I hope you liked this! Please review/favourite/follow if you did!_

 _\- April_

 _Revised and updated: 01/05/2016_


	2. Chapter 2

Lucy woke up early the next morning to the sun shining on her face through the window. She rolled over and groaned into the blanket as she attempted to pull it up over her face, but only stopped fighting with it when she realised that there was someone sitting on her blanket.

"Good morning, Princess."

Lucy sighed as she opened her eyes. "Morning, Loke," she whispered, smiling at the spirit and mentally thanking him for his version of an alarm clock. She pushed the blanket back and slowly got out of bed, then began heading towards her small kitchen to grab a glass of water as Loke trailed behind her.

"Heading out with Natsu today?"

"Not today, but I am going out on a job." She looked at the clock and noticed she had to start getting ready if she was going to get to the station in time. She placed the glass in the sink and then headed towards the bathroom, closing the door behind her. She knew Loke wouldn't come in (as much as he probably wanted to), but she also knew the closed door wouldn't stop the conversation.

"Going out alone then?" Loke asked as he pulled her blankets back up over the mattress, making it neat once again. He could hear the bath filling up as he walked over to the kitchen and began tidying up, rinsing the cup she had just used.

"Well, no, actually." She paused as she stepped into the bath, the water slightly burning her skin and she slowly sat down before she continued, "Cana decided that she would use her cards to assign jobs to people in the guild since no one was really doing any… So I'm going with Bickslow, actually."

"Bickslow? Interesting…"

"Why does everyone keep saying that?"

"Well, that's probably because you haven't worked with him before, and you both tend to stick with your own teams, so it's a little unexpected that you two would get paired together…" He wasn't even sure if their types of magic would be compatible in the field. But shaking his head, hoping he need not worry about his master, Loke looked around at the now tidy apartment. Lucy was most likely thinking about what he had just said, so he returned to the door once again and called into the bathroom, "I must return now, Princess. I'll send Virgo out soon. I trust you will call me out if you need me."

Lucy looked towards the door to see the golden light from his departure peek through the gap at the bottom. Barely fifteen minutes later, Virgo had appeared in the middle of her bathroom holding a large fluffy towel. With that, Lucy stepped out of the bath and wrapped herself in the towel from Virgo before walking back into her living area. She noticed the bed was made and all the cushions on her sofa were now neatly arranged, and mentally thanked Loke again before she grabbed her clothes for the day – a purple tank top and a black skirt – from the dresser.

"Thank you, Virgo," she smiled as she pulled on her boots.

"Was there anything else I can do for you, Princess?" Virgo asked.

"No, thank you. You can go now."

"As you wish." Virgo bowed before disappearing in the usual golden light. It always felt warm to Lucy, so she smiled as her beloved spirit returned to her world.

It was almost 7 a.m., and as Lucy gave a quick onceover her apartment, she made sure she had everything with her. The job seemed easy enough according to the request, so once she was confident she had everything she needed, she locked the door behind her and made her way towards Magnolia train station.

* * *

Bickslow made his way over to the platform where Lucy stood. He realised she wasn't aware that he was behind her, so he quietly walked towards her before making his presence known. "Hey, Cosplayer." He watched her just about jump up to his height as she spun around, and he couldn't help but chuckle quietly to himself at the site of her flushed face.

"Don't do that again!" she shouted, placing a hand over her chest feeling her heart race. Once she wasn't wanting to slap him as much, she reached into her bag and pulled out the tickets to hand one of them to Bickslow. "Here, I got your ticket for you since you decided to cut it so close."

"Hey, there's still two minutes until the train is leaving. Plenty of time."

"Yeah, right," she scoffed, and she only turned her back to him to head towards the nearest carriage door.

Once they had boarded, they made their way towards the first empty seats they could find, only to find themselves sitting across from two elderly women. Lucy was used to having all four seats filled on train trips with her team, but then she was only remembering that she wasn't with her team; she was with Bickslow. And suddenly, as Bickslow quickly took the window seat for himself, Lucy was thinking that their pairing really was just a little interesting.

"So how long is this train ride going to be, exactly?" Bickslow asked once Lucy had settled herself down beside him.

"About five hours, I think," she sighed. It was definitely going to be a long trip, that was for sure. "I don't know if we'll be able to get back in tonight, either. I'm not really sure how long this job will take us."

"Well, I hope these chairs are comfortable."

* * *

They were only a little over an hour into their train ride then, and Bickslow had spent most of that time staring out the window. The sky had gradually gotten darker the farther they got from Magnolia.

He looked over at the elderly ladies seated opposite them. Both had their eyes closed, and he seriously wondered if they were still breathing or not since they seemed a little too quiet. He didn't want to risk removing his visor, though, so he just had to guess.

When a yawn broke the silence, he looked back down to the girl beside him. "You and Loke up all night?" he asked as his tongue lolled from his mouth in his usual grin. He couldn't help but tease her about the spirit. He really couldn't.

"I'm not… We're not…" Lucy knew she was blushing then as she struggled with her response. You'd think she would be better at telling the actual truth, especially since it was the truth, but still, no matter how many times Bickslow asked her that, she struggled. Composing herself, she calmly said, "I've told you before, we're not together." Lucy looked back down at her hands quickly shrugged. "I just couldn't sleep last night."

"Uh-huh. If you say so."

So then Bickslow went back to looking out the window. He could see their reflections in the window against the stormy skies; the blonde of her hair stood out, as well as the purple from his hood. But he was pulled from the reflection when one of the ladies suddenly began coughing, and just as soon as she was done, she appeared to be dead again.

"Not dead then."

He looked back down to Lucy when she quietly began to giggle, and Bickslow couldn't help but laugh quietly with her. "Apparently not," he agreed quietly.

And then Bickslow was back to staring at the sky as they continued on their journey, only noticing that it kept getting darker and stormier the farther they got from Magnolia. He later felt something soft on the side of his shoulder and he looked down out of curiosity. Bickslow tensed when he realised it was Lucy using his arm as a pillow. _Did she just fall asleep on me?_ He lifted his free hand and lightly poked her on the head. "Cosplayer?" he whispered, but he got no response from the blonde.

"Oh, leave her alone. Let the girl sleep."

Bickslow looked up then just to find one of the elderly ladies opposite them smiling at him.

"Uh… Right. Yeah, okay…" he mumbled. He looked down at the now sleeping blonde once again before turning to look out the window. He closed his eyes for a few minutes, wondering what was going on. First he was feeling strangely nervous about his job with the woman, and now he was letting her sleep on him? It was weird.

Bickslow only shook his head lightly and tipped his head back in the chair. _Well, if she's sleeping, I suppose I should try and sleep too_. He only looked down at her once again, and then back out the window once more before closing his eyes once again and attempting to sleep.

* * *

Lucy was awoken by the train's intercom announcing that they would arrive soon. She rubbed her eyes and pulled herself up so she was sitting up straight once again. _Wait… what?_ It was only then that Lucy even realised what she'd done, and she only looked over to her right to see Bickslow beginning to wake up himself.

"Oh. I'm… I'm so sorry," she quickly apologised. "I didn't mean to fall asleep on you…" She said a little too fast.

Bickslow shrugged. "It's fine. You seemed comfortable and you said you didn't sleep much last night, so…" He stretched his arms up over his head before looking back out the window and mumbling, "Plus I got told you leave you alone…"

"Leave me alone? Who could have possibly told you to leave me alone?"

"One of the old ladies across from us." They'd gotten off at one of the other stops, Bickslow figured. He'd been asleep, surprisingly. "She said to leave you alone and let you sleep, so I did. I didn't think it would be the end of the world. Next time I promise I'll just continue poking you until you wake up."

"Oh… Well, uh, thank you, I guess." Her nap really had been needed as it turns out, and she was strangely thankful that Bickslow had let her be. But as much as she felt like she probably could do with another nap, they were almost at their stop, and she didn't have time to sleep. So as Bickslow went back to staring out at the dark and ominous clouds beyond the window, Lucy only turned her attention to her hands in her lap.

* * *

They stood outside the station in town. It was almost eerily quiet due to the bad weather with everyone staying inside, but they weren't there for the weather, so Lucy just began heading towards wherever it was they needed to go.

"So what exactly is this job for anyway?" Bickslow asked once they'd left the station. It was the first time he had asked about the job itself. He'd figured there had been no point in knowing all that much about it.

Lucy pulled the flyer from her bag and unfolded it, quickly studying it. "It says we just need to make sure some trail in a forest is clear for a school trip or something tomorrow."

"Sounds easy enough."

The school that the request had come from was unfortunately on the opposite side of the town, which only meant they had a long and painfully silent walk ahead of them. Bickslow still couldn't help look up to the dark sky above them. Something didn't seem quite right about, but he only pushed it to the back of his mind and continued to silently follow just behind Lucy.

When they did reach the school, Lucy met with the teacher in charge of the trip herself while he stayed out in the hall. Watching the weather through the window seemed more interesting, so he only watched the strong wind blow around leaves and small pieces of debris from various places within the town. Even the odd plastic bag flew past.

Lucy came down the stairs once she was done just to see Bickslow slumped on one of the small chairs, staring out the windows at the front of the building, and she noticed that he still seemed troubled by something. _Probably just the weather._

Bickslow turned to face the blonde when he noticed her lurking by the bottom of the stairs. "Are we going to go do this job, or are you going to continue staring?" he asked with a smirk.

"I'm wasn't staring," she muttered. Okay, she was. Just a little bit. She shook her head and headed for the door, only to find that Bickslow was already ahead of her and was now holding the door open for her. "Oh, such the gentleman today."

"Aren't I always one?" he scoffed.

They made their way out into the town once again, heading towards the entrance for the trail, which was on the southern side of the town. Lucy looked around at the buildings as they went. The town wasn't like Magnolia. There were no canals to walk along; no streets filled with various shops; no guild. She wondered what it would be like to live in a town without a guild. Fairy Tail and Magnolia went hand in hand. Without one, the other just didn't seem complete.

She sighed quietly to herself and looked up at the man next to her. She noticed that he would occasionally look up towards the sky and from the corner of her eyes she could see the slight frown on his face. Fed up with the silence, she decided to question it. "You seem tense. What's up?"

Bickslow slowed as he heard her. There weren't exactly many people in the guild that asked him such questions. Sure, they were all one giant family, but there's always going to be separate groups within each family. Laxus and the Raijinshuu were his group, and Team Natsu – hell, the rest of the guild – was hers. Lucy wasn't really one to ask him that kind of question.

"It's fine if you don't want to talk, but if you do, I'm here to listen," she said.

Bickslow looked down at her. He figured he would indulge her with his thoughts. She had asked, after all. "This weather," he said. "It doesn't seem normal."

Lucy looked up. It was the first time she had really noticed it, despite how dark it was making everything with the sun having been swallowed up by the clouds. She figured it was just a typical storm though – she'd seen worse, and really, she was just thankful it wasn't raining yet – so she just ignored it and looked back down to continue looking at where she was going. "What do you mean? It seems like a normal storm to me."

"Laxus tends to… attract bad weather, I guess. So I'm used to being caught in storms on jobs occasionally. But this… This just seems weird." He shrugged as he looked forward again. "Maybe you're right, though." Maybe he was just being paranoid.

He seemed to visibly relax as they continued along their way. Lucy would occasionally sneak a glance, just out of curiosity. She could tell something was still making him slightly uncomfortable, but decided to just leave it alone.

As they continued walking, the streets eventually turned to worn cobblestone and the buildings became sparser. Before long, they were reaching the edge of town and entering the forest where the trail supposedly began.

"Is that the cabin we were supposed to go to first?" Bickslow asked as he pointed to the small log cabin just behind a few trees.

"I guess so," Lucy said. She peered in through the windows to see if anyone was inside, only to find it dark and empty, then joined Bickslow in front of the map to the side of the building. "There doesn't seem to be anyone here, though, so I guess we'll just keep going."

* * *

"So what exactly are we supposed to be making sure _isn't_ on this trail?" Bickslow asked dryly, breaking the silence that had been surrounding them the entire way so far. "I mean, so far it just seems like a boring trail. Did I mention that it's boring?"

Lucy rolled her eyes. "The teacher said there's been a history of bandits and smaller Vulcans being around here or something."

"Well, I haven't seen any, but with this weather I doubt anything would be stupid enough to stay out in the open anyway."

"Probably. But still, it's an easy job, and nothing is going to get destroyed for once…" she sighed. Lucy was only inwardly thanking Cana for the pairings, strangely. The lack of destruction that would come from that job was a very welcome change.

He'd heard about her team going a little insane, and he couldn't help but chuckle. "I heard most of the reward money goes to repairs on your jobs." Glancing down at her, Bickslow quickly continued when he saw the blush on her cheeks. "Don't worry. We do quite a bit of damage too. Laxus just destroyed the mayor's home in Borwatt. Like, completely destroyed. It's just a Fairy Tail thing. We either go all in or not at all." And oddly enough, seeing Lucy smile then had him smiling to himself as they kept walking along the seemingly never ending trail.

For most of the afternoon, having already been on the trail for over two hours, the wind itself had been warm – or at least it hadn't been cold enough for her to call out Horologium to hide inside (plus, she didn't exactly want to give Bickslow a reason to judge her too much). But as they went deeper into the forest and walked further along the trail, it slowly became colder and the chill began to get to Lucy. It wasn't really until she felt the weight of something being draped over her shoulders that she even noticed she'd been getting cold. She looked to see what it was, only to look up to the Seith mage in surprise when she saw the white fur trim of his cloak on her shoulders.

Bickslow quickly explained himself before she could even question it. "You were shivering." He'd noticed it a few moments earlier, and he'd felt bad for her. Her clothes were really not at all appropriate for that weather, but that wasn't her fault.

"O-Oh. Well, thank you, Bickslow," she whispered as she pulled it around her more, enjoying the warmth from it. She felt that the bottom of it was dragging on the ground behind her as she walked, so she made a mental note to get it cleaned before she returned it – Virgo could probably take care of that. It was the least she could do.

It wasn't long before she started to feel tiny drops of water falling onto her face, and soon after it was bucketing down with both of them becoming soaked in a matter of seconds. Lucy instinctively pulled the cloak even tighter just to savour the warmth, and as the fur brushed against her nose and held it close, she realised that it smelled like cinnamon, but sweeter almost, and there was an almost woody scent to it that made her want to wrap herself up in it even more. Even the way it smelled was making it seem warm, even in the middle of a storm.

She had been enjoying the warmth of it in silence as they continued walking. Only occasionally would Bickslow sneak a glance up towards Lucy from the muddy trail beneath them, and he really couldn't help but smile to himself at her completely wrapped up in it. He liked it way more than he should, that was for sure.

Eventually, though, the trail started heading downhill. The heavy rain was turning the actual path into something that resembled a muddy river scattered with rocks, and it only caused them both to briefly lose their footing more than once. "Careful, Cosplayer," Bickslow warned her as the downward slope became a little steeper. "It's getting slipperier."

"I know, I know," Lucy muttered. She didn't need Bickslow reminding her of what she already knew. She was about to open her mouth to tell him just that when her foot slipped on a rock and she lost her footing completely. No words were able to come out of her mouth as she found herself slipping down the trail.

"Lucy!" Bickslow quickly reached out to try and grab hold of her to keep her from falling, but as he leaned forward to get his hand on the only thing within his reach – his cloak – his feet were coming out from under him and Bickslow was tumbling down the muddy path after her.

Various cries and groans came from the two, mostly resembling ' _ow,'_ ' _ouch,'_ or whatever curses fled Bickslow's mouth, then they both eventually came to a stop when the terrain evened out. Lucy ended up on her back, and somehow, Bickslow had landed sprawled across her. Both were equally covered in mud, though with the heavy rain that was still coming down on them, it was quickly washing the dirt away from any exposed skin. Lucy was only able to stare up to the still dark storm clouds high above them and let the rain pelt down on her face.

Bickslow was the first to realise their current predicament, and he was quickly pushing himself up and off of the blonde. "Shit, are you okay?" he asked a little breathlessly as he sat down beside her instead.

She nodded as she pushed herself up, only wincing slightly until she was leaning on her elbows. "Yeah, I'm fine," she said. She felt fine, anyway. Nothing was broken, at least. That was good. But when barely a minute had passed where neither of them had picked themselves up from the ground, and when Lucy again glanced to the Seith mage sitting just in front of her with his back against her, she couldn't help but quietly begin to giggle as she looked up towards the skies again.

Bickslow stared back at her when her giggling seemed to turn into a full blown laughing fit, and he raised an eyebrow behind his visor. "What's so funny?"

"You called me Lucy," she giggled.

Had he? He couldn't remember, but Bickslow couldn't help but smile. "You're mistaken, Cosplayer."

"Yeah, right."

Bickslow rolled his eyes and finally stood, then helped Lucy to her feet. And for a second, Bickslow didn't even seem to register the fact that Lucy had yet to let go of his hand once she was just standing in front of him. He only looked down to her, seeing how the mud from the fall was smeared on her cheeks and her hair was plastered around her face, and Bickslow couldn't help but lift his free hand to tuck a section of her hair back behind her ear.

When she blushed, quickly looking away and stepping back, Bickslow was just as quickly taking his own step away and bringing both of his hands back to his sides. _What the hell did I do that for?_

"Well, uh…" She cleared her throat as she adjusted the cloak around her shoulders. "The path loops around from here, I think, so I guess if we just keep following it we'll end up back in town…" And soon enough, the two began walking again in silence, albeit they were just a little closer than they had been before.

* * *

 _ **Notes** : Boring A/Ns from the original version have been deleted. Because really, they weren't important. Actually important ones (like replies and such) will be kept. As usual, I'm just fixing up grammatical errors and such, re-arranging sentences, that kind of thing. _

_Updated: 09/06/2016_


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello again!**  
 **So, I decided to spend the last 3 days in bed reading all 436 chapters of the manga, and oh my godddddddddddd. So basically, I didn't get much writing done at all last week (like none at all), so if I wasn't for the fact I'm already several chapters ahead, then there wouldn't be a chapter now hehe.**

 **Anyway, I wanted to put this up last night (since it's Monday morning for me now), but I was just writing and it was getting late and I completely forgot. You should be able to expect new chapters every Sunday, so I hope that's okay. I'm not sure how long I'll be able to keep that up, but I've got enough chapters for it to last more than a month with that schedule.**

 **Again, thank you for reviewing/favouriting/following! It means the world to me that you like it enough to do so.**

 **Kurahieirtir JIO: I'm glad you commented on that in your second review. I'll be coming back to that in a few chapters, but for time being it won't pop up again for a bit. (Sort of spoilers but not really spoilers?)**

 **One last thing too: I apologise for any OOCness, but what can I say - it's a BixLu fic and the entire thing is going to be OOC. I say this now, because this is probably where it's going to get really OOC but I'm still trying to keep them close to their usual selves, I don't even know anymore.**

 **Disclaimer: If you don't know that Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail and not I, then you've been living under a rock or something. Do I need to say this every chapter?**

 **I hope you enjoy it, and I hope that it's starting to get a bit more interesting from this point forward!**

* * *

The rain had eventually let up, and from what they could tell the storm had begun to fade away. Most of the trail from that point onwards had been an awkward silence. Neither wanted to talk about what had happened. Lucy would occasionally look at Bickslow from the corner of her eyes and blush whenever she realised that he had also been sneaking glances.

It wasn't long before they reached the cabin they had started at. From here they could see the outskirts of the town, and the sky above it was tinged with orange in the gaps between the storm clouds.

The two now walked along the quiet streets. The rain had washed most of the mud off of them, but a lot still remained. Lucy realised that there was no way they'd be able to get a train back to Magnolia now, and even if they did, they'd arrive too late at night. She sighed as she realised what it meant, so Lucy stopped walking and reached her arm out to grab Bickslow's arm as he continued walking, unaware that she had stopped behind him. He tensed at the contact and looked down at the hand now grasping his arm. She released it and brought it back to her side. Bickslow followed the movement and looked at her face, wondering why they had stopped.

"It's too late to be getting a train, and the school will be closed by now. I guess we'll have to find an inn for tonight, and then we can just catch the earliest train back to Magnolia." Lucy had a slight frown on her face. She hadn't wanted this job to take any more than a day, but the travelling had taken up most of the time so they now had no choice.

"I guess so. We better go find one then." Bickslow turned his head again and began walking in the direction they were originally going. He could hear the footsteps behind him as he realised Lucy had jogged to catch up to him and was now at his side again.

"Did you see any on our way here?"

"I think I saw one, but it was near the station."

"Alright, lead the way, then." Lucy put her hand out in front of her, gesturing for Bickslow to be the leader. He looked down at her for a second again, before averting his gaze back to the path ahead.

The walk back to that side of the town wasn't as long as they had thought, and they soon arrived at a small inn that was located on a street around the corner from the station. As they walked into the reception of the building, they were greeted by a disgusted look on the receptionist's face. Bickslow and Lucy had momentarily forgotten about their mud-covered clothes, and had both looked down in shame once realising. Lucy walked up to the man at the front counter.

"Sorry about the mess…" Bickslow had turned to look behind him and noticed the muddy footprints behind them and couldn't help but smirk, "Do you have any rooms left for tonight?" Lucy had continued on. She was just hoping they would let them stay here after the mess they had made of the lobby.

The man quickly pulled out a large book and skimmed through a few pages before looking up at the two before him, "We only have the one room left. Was it just the one night?" He had scoffed. He still wasn't pleased with the messy customers before him.

"Yes, just the one night please." Lucy was relieved to hear they had a room left, so she immediately brightened at hearing the words, that, and the idea of being able to clean herself up.

"Right then," the man turned around to face the wall behind him and pulled the key from the hook before turning and handing it to Lucy, "Room 7. Down the end of the hall to your right."

"Thank you, sir!" Lucy beamed and practically ran in the direction of the hall. Bickslow just followed the girl down the hall, ignoring the glares from the man behind the counter.

Lucy looked at each of the numbers on the door, trying to find the one that she had the key to. She realised that the inn had to be much bigger than it appeared from the street, as it was quite a long hall. She could vaguely hear the heavy footsteps of Bickslow behind her, but she just kept walking. She came across Room 7 after walking for what felt like forever, and she inserted the key in the lock, twisting the handle once she heard the lock click.

She looked around the room from the doorway. Her jaw dropped. In the middle of the room sat one of the biggest beds she had seen in her entire life. The pillows were white, with the blanket being a deep red. On each side of the table sat light coloured wood tables, with tall glass lamps on each one. The lampshades matched the sheets and the blanket. On one side of the room sat a white leather sofa, with a matching armchair and a coffee table that matched the tables next to the bed.

"Why are you standing in the doorway, Cosp- oh." Bickslow was now standing just behind Lucy who was standing motionless in the doorway still. He could see over her head at what she was looking at.

One bed.

 _One giant bed._

He put his hands on her shoulders gently and pushed her into the room. He could feel her muscles tense at the contact. "I'll sleep on the couch, don't worry," He removed his hands from her shoulders as he pushed the door closed behind him. Lucy was now walking around the room, looking at everything in it. It was a nice room, no denying it, but it was not what they had expected. "I'm sure you want to go shower or something."

"Oh, yeah… you're right." Lucy was brought back from her daze from observing the room. She headed towards what appeared to be the bathroom, since it was the only other door in the room. She closed the door as she entered the room, and summoned Virgo as she turned the water on in the shower, the steam filling the room slowly.

"Punishment, Princess?" Her pink-haired spirit had asked.

"No, Virgo…" Lucy blushed, as usual. "Are you able to take these clothes to the Spirit World to clean them up, or bring me some more clothes?" She slowly removed the clothes, hanging Bickslow's cloak on a hook with the rest of her clothes.

"Of course, Princess," Virgo bowed, "Will I be taking the Seith Mage's cloak, too?"

"Uh… yes please, if it isn't too much trouble." She had kind of forgotten that she had been wearing it, and she didn't really notice when she hung it up. Lucy stepped into the shower as Virgo gathered all the clothes and disappeared with the golden light. Lucy closed her eyes as the warmth from the water and the steam enveloped her. She was grateful to finally be clean again.

She was just stepping out of the shower and grabbing one of the large towels that sat on the counter in the room when Virgo appeared, holding the neatly folded and now clean clothes.

"Here you are, Princess," Lucy took the clothes from Virgo and put them on again, "Was there anything else I could be of assistance with?"

Lucy was about to send her spirit back when she realised that Bickslow was covered in as much mud as she had been, so instead she just walked back into the main room with Virgo behind her. Bickslow had been sitting staring at his hands while waiting for Lucy to be done with the bathroom. He had placed a towel on the sofa, as to not get it dirty. He looked up when he heard the door to the bathroom open.

"Virgo can take your clothes and clean them. I'm sure you wouldn't want to stay in them any longer than necessary." Virgo smiled as Lucy offered for the spirit to take his clothes.

He nodded as he stood up and headed towards the now empty bathroom. The room was still filled with steam. The door closed once again and Bickslow got ready to step into the shower. He was about to hang his shirt on the hook when he realised that his cape that he had loaned to Lucy was hanging on another hook, now free from the mud. He smiled to himself and got on with his disrobing.

Lucy was now sitting with her legs crossed on the bed. It was still too early to actually sleep, so she wondered what she could do to entertain herself. She looked around the room. She found mostly trashy magazines and novels, but she also found the most recent edition of Sorcerer Weekly, so she opted to read that instead, making herself comfortable on the bed once again. She was about to open the magazine when she heard Bickslow make a sound that resembled a shriek.

"LOKE?!" Lucy blanched at the sound. If Loke had forced his gate open, and was in the bathroom with Bickslow… it was probably not very good.

Bickslow had frantically reached for the towel he had placed next to the shower to shield himself from the lion spirit.

"Virgo figured you would be more comfortable if I returned your clothes instead." Loke had mumbled. He obviously didn't want to be there as much as Bickslow didn't want him there.

They both stood staring at each other for a moment, Bickslow shuffling nervously. Loke cleared his throat before turning to place the clothes in his arms on the bench along with the other towels.

"Thanks for the clothes." Bickslow said quietly as Loke walked towards the door and headed out into the main room. Bickslow's eye's widened and all colour from his face had disappeared as he looked out into the room, only to find an equally surprised and pale Lucy staring back at him, who was only barely holding onto a towel. He quickly ran towards the door and pushed it close and leant against it, sliding down to sit on the cold tiles. _Well, that was awkward_ , he thought to himself, as he dragged his hands down his face.

* * *

"Loke? Why are you here, I thought Virgo was returning the clothes?" Lucy couldn't but smile as Loke sat down beside her.

Loke shrugged, "She asked if I could do it. She didn't think it would be appropriate to be in a bathroom with Bickslow, unless it involved punishment." He shuddered at the thought and Lucy blushed. Her spirits were definitely crazy, "Anyway, I shall be going once again, Princess." Her lion spirit pulled Lucy into a hug, and then she watched as he stepped backwards and returned to the Celestial Spirit world.

The door to the bathroom opened once again as Bickslow walked out. One hand was running back and forth in his hair, while the other hand was supporting his helmet that was tucked under his arm. Lucy couldn't help but giggle when he lay down on the couch, his feet hanging off one end and his head off the other while one arm draped and was just touching the ground, the other arm resting over his eyes.

"What are you laughing at this time, Cosplayer?"

"Well, your hair is sticking out in all weird angles, and you don't even come close to fitting on that couch." She eventually got out between giggles. Bickslow's hands went up to his hair once again and he ran them through it once again, sending tiny droplets of water in all directions.

Bickslow didn't respond for a while. Lucy went back to reading her magazine, and it was only when Bickslow couldn't stand the only noise in the room being the pages turning that he decided to speak, "What are you reading?"

"Sorcerer Weekly. Apparently Laxus is still the number one eligible bachelor in Fairy Tail."

Bickslow let out a short laugh, "Yeah, sounds about right. I don't think they got the message that he's not interested though."

The room was once again silent as their brief conversation ended. Lucy yawned quietly and placed the magazine on the table next to the bed before walking over to the small dresser that was in the room. She opened it and found various shirts and robes that all sported the inn's logo. She picked up one of the shirts and held it out in front of her. _This will have to do, I guess_ , she thought to herself as she pulled the shirt on over her clothes. She looked behind her to make sure Bickslow wasn't looking, and was pleased to find that he had his arm covering his eyes once again. She quickly pulled her black skirt down, folding it neatly and placing it on the dresser, a ong with the purple tank top she had been wearing, which she removed from under the new shirt. She was grateful that the shirt was many sizes too big, and went half way down her thigh. Lucy quietly made her way over back to the bed and pulled back the covers, and as soon as she had climbed in, she just about melted from the warmth that surrounded her. She hummed contentedly and Bickslow couldn't help but raise his arm to look at where the sound came from. He got up and was about to turn out the lights when Lucy spoke.

"You're too big for that lounge, and this bed is way too big. Just… get in, okay?" She blushed when she finished her sentence. The only person who had ever shared her bed had been Natsu, and she never had a choice with that.

"It's fine, I'd prefer the lounge any-"

"Bickslow." Lucy sighed. She wasn't in the mood to argue, and she didn't want him to be complaining about having a sore back and barely any sleep in the morning, "Just do it, okay? And don't even think about wearing all of those stupid clothes you wear." She almost regretted saying the last part, but again, she didn't want him feeling uncomfortable. There was already an awkward tension between the two and she didn't need it to be worse. Lucy figured if he could just be comfortable, then it would be fine.

"Uh… okay…" Bickslow mumbled. If it were anyone else, he would be cracking jokes left, right, and centre, or trying to actually sleep with them — but not with her, and it made him wonder what was going on. He quietly removed his "stupid clothes", as she had deemed them, and folded them roughly before placing them on the sofa, leaving him in just his boxers.

Lucy felt the mattress sink as he sat down on it and eventually lay down on. She could feel the blanket shuffling as he pulled it up. Bickslow exhaled. He wasn't aware that he had been holding his breath, but instead of questioning it even more, he just rolled over to his side, with his back facing Lucy's back too.

There were a few minutes of silence before Lucy whispered, barely audible to him, "Goodnight, Bickslow."

"Night." He had said after another silent moment, and the two closed their eyes and went to sleep for the night.

* * *

Bickslow was the first to wake up the next morning. He could feel something soft against his face, but figured it was just the pillow. _Damn, this bed is warm,_ he thought to himself as he pushed his head further into what he thought was the pillow, but once he realised it was slightly harder than a pillow should be, and a pillow shouldn't be tickling his nose, he opened one eye and looked down slightly, shocked to find the bright blonde hair belonging to a certain Celestial Spirit Mage. He opened his other eye to take in the scene. One arm was resting on his side, and the other was below the blonde and was snaked around her back, resting just below her shoulder on her arm. He realised that the blonde was pressed up against him, with one hand against his chest, and the other resting just above his waist. _What the_... he wondered, _how did this happen?_ He gently tried to pull himself away from her and the bed (as much as he really did not want to), but instead was pulled in tighter, with Lucy burying her head in closer, humming softly.

Bickslow sighed. He was hoping to avoid the awkwardness of her waking up like this, or more so _with him._ He thought back to the night before – he remembered them facing opposite directions as they went to sleep, but he didn't remember moving, or feeling her move, or anything other than being asleep. The Seith mage looked down at the girl next to him again. Her hair was splayed out on the pillow and the sheets, and Bickslow couldn't help but reach up with the arm that was around her shoulder and pull back the section of hair was covering her face. He tensed when she moved slightly, thinking that she was waking up, he braced himself for the worst.

Instead, she stayed asleep. He continued looking at her. His breath caught as he realised how beautiful she actually was. He had noticed her before when she was in the guild, and he had definitely thought she was hot, but now that he was close to her, he could see how she was truly beautiful. He closed his eyes and turned his gaze towards the ceiling. _No, Bickslow. Stop staring at her while she's asleep, you creep,_ he mentally scolded himself. He wondered how long it would be before she woke up, as he didn't exactly want to wake her up. He was already scared of what her reaction would be, and he didn't want to make it worse by disturbing her sleep any more.

When he felt her stirring again, he looked down at her. He had managed to move onto his back, with her hands now resting against his stomach and chest, and his arm still remained around her shoulder. _Oh god, she's waking up_ , he thought. He watched as Lucy's eyes slowly fluttered open, and then turned his gaze elsewhere while she realised the predicament.

Lucy moved one of her hands to her eyes and rubbed them, trying to rub away the sleep that lingered. She leant up on one elbow to look around, only to be greeted by a certain blue-and-black haired mage directly in front of her. She started the feel the weight on her shoulder as it went away, and looked behind her to see Bickslow's arm now lying flat on the bed. She sat up more when she realised that they were now in the middle of the bed. _Wait, that's not where I… how did I get here?_ She questioned herself as she looked around before turning back to Bickslow, who was now sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to her.

"Uh, morning?" She said quietly.

"Yeah, morning…" Bickslow mumbled. He was just waiting for her to freak out or something.

The two just sat on the bed quietly for a few minutes before anyone spoke, "So… that was an interesting way to wake up." Lucy had said with a slight laugh.

"Sorry about that." He said as he pulled himself up from the bed and walked over to where his clothes were.

"I don't really think you need to be sorry, considering it was both of our faults," she blushed as he looked over to her with one eyebrow raised, "Not like we both stayed on one side of the bed… we were both in the middle…" Lucy looked down to the sheets as her blush deepened.

"Right, well…" Bickslow didn't exactly know what was going on, so he just decided to change the subject entirely, "there should be a train in about an hour or so, so we should probably get ready to head back."

Lucy nodded, thankful for the subject change. She pushed the covers on the bed back and leapt over to the dresser on the other side of the room. It was the first time that Bickslow had seen what she was wearing, and he couldn't help but let his eyes go a little wider as he looked at the choice of clothes, or lack of clothing in this case. He shook his head and pulled on his shirt. Bickslow heard the bathroom door close just behind him as he realised that she must have gone in there to change.

Lucy was standing in front of the mirror with her hands on the edge of the counter. She thought back to what had just happened – she had woken up with Bickslow, and she had liked it. Or at least liked it enough to not kick him down the hallway. Lucy cupped her hands and filled them with the cold water, splashing it on her face and she brought her hands up. She shook her head, pushing all thoughts of Bickslow to the back of her mind and began getting dressed. As she finished up, she picked up the large t-shirt she had slept in and threw it in the large basket against one wall. Confident that she was ready for the day, she stepped back into the main room.

Bickslow was laying on the couch once again, his helmet still sitting on the coffee table. He tipped his head back as he heard the bathroom door open and he could see Lucy walking towards him before she stopped just in front of where his head. One more step and he would have been able to see what she actually had under that black skirt of hers. He couldn't help but smirk at the thought.

She stepped back once she looked down and saw the smirk on his face, but decided not to comment on it. "Come on, we have to go back to the school."

Bickslow inwardly groaned as he pushed himself up from the couch and headed for the door that was now open. He pulled the door closed behind him and continued with putting his helmet back over his hair as he walked down the hall. He could see Lucy was already at the reception area. As he entered the room, he was greeted with yet another glare from the man behind the counter, so he looked down at the tiles to find that they were no longer covered in mud.

"Thank you again, sir." Lucy had said cheerily as she walked towards the front door, placing her bag at her side again. Bickslow walked just behind her. Once outside, Lucy couldn't help but wrap her arms around herself. The wind today was definitely a lot cooler than the day before, and she was still wearing clothes that were not designed for this weather.

"Here." She looked to Bickslow who had his cloak in one hand and was offering it to Lucy.

Lucy smiled and grabbed the cloak from Bickslow, wrapping it around her shoulders again. She couldn't help but take in the scent of cinnamon that came from it, and smiled into the fur trim once again. The two walked towards the school once again. Bickslow had noticed that the sky was still a shade of grey, but it wasn't as dark as it had been the day before, and it wasn't as worrying anymore. He looked towards her a few times every now and then, only to find her wrapped up tightly in _his_ cloak, with the fur going up to the bottom of her ears, hiding half of her face. He couldn't help but be reminded of the fact that he was not acting like his usual self around her. He didn't know what is was about her, but he just felt the need to be… nicer? Bickslow wasn't sure what to call it, so instead of stressing himself out about it again, he pushed it to the back of his mind once again.

* * *

They reached the school during what appeared to be a break in the classes, so as they walked into the main lobby, kids surrounded them. Bickslow lifted his arms up and looked down at the swarm of children around him, "Gah, I'm glad I don't have my babies around at the moment." Lucy giggled at his reaction before making her way through the sea of children. She pointed to a row of chairs on the wall, motioning for him to wait over there. He was forced to sit in the empty chair between two children, and Bickslow was definitely starting to feel uncomfortable. He folded his arms over his chest, and waited for Lucy to return who had disappeared within the crowd.

Bickslow could feel someone tugging on his head, so he turned his head to see the child who was supposed to be sitting next to him, now standing on the chair and he realised that the boy must have been playing with the purple plume on the top of it. He sunk lower in his chair and grumbled. He figured it would be best to just ignore them, and hope that this torture wouldn't last long.

Lucy returned to the main entrance a few minutes later, only to find Bickslow slumped in his chair against the wall, seemingly being 'attacked' by the children. She laughed at the sight, and made her way over to them, "Alright guys, leave him alone. I'm sure you have a class to get to." She giggled as she watched the kids jump off the chairs and run towards the classrooms. Bickslow just sighed and readjusted his visor. He was proud of himself for putting up with it and not using his Figure Eyes on any of them.

"I take it you're not a fan of kids?" Lucy had asked once they were out of the building and heading towards the station.

"No." Bickslow had responded, not caring enough to give any other answer as he looked about the streets for any form of café or something similar.

"What about Asuka?" Lucy would find it hard to believe that anyone could not like Asuka.

Bickslow shrugged, "Asuka is different."

Lucy smiled as she thought of the small child. She remembered her day of jobs with her and Natsu, and how happy Asuka had been once she was able to give the lacrima back to her parents. As she got lost in her memories, she didn't notice that Bickslow had grabbed hold of her arm and was pulling her into a small café opposite the train station. He only had to do so after he had veered from the path and she kept walking, and so he was forced to return to pull her back to the small building.

"Do you want anything?" Bickslow looked down at the blonde who was staring at all of the food in the glass display.

"Oh… right! I had completely forgotten we hadn't eaten since yesterday morning…" She trailed off and she looked all of the items and thought of what she wanted, "maybe just a slice of banana bread?"

Bickslow nodded and moved over to the other side of the counter where the orders were placed. Lucy had taken a seat at a table by the window while waiting. She watched as Bickslow came and sat down a few minutes later, a plate with her banana bread in one hand and a plate with what appeared to be a bacon sandwich in the other. He placed both of the plates on the table and sat opposite her. The two ate in silence: Lucy pulling off small pieces from the slice before placing them in her mouth, Bickslow taking large bites of the sandwich. Lucy was almost done with hers when she remembered the reward.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Bickslow raised an eyebrow in response to her sudden outbreak. Lucy reached into her bag and pulled out an envelope and held it out in front of her, waiting for Bickslow to take it, "It's half of the reward."

Bickslow held a hand up, "No, it's not worth it since the job was literally just walking through the forest. And besides, I've heard you need to pay your rent." He grinned as she blushed a light pink.

"Does everyone know about that these days?" She mumbled.

"Pretty much." He watched as her blush deepened.

It wasn't long before Lucy was done too. Lucy picked up both of the plates and returned them to the counter and then headed back out to the street where Bickslow was waiting. As they walked across the street to the station, she pulled the cape in closer to her as she began to feel the cold once again. Once inside the station, Bickslow had offered to get the tickets this time, so Lucy just stood by the entrance and waited for him to return. He returned with the tickets in his hand a moment later, just as they heard the train come in to the station.

Lucy followed behind Bickslow as they made their way down the carriage before they found two empty seats, Lucy taking the window seat this time and Bickslow sitting on the isle. Two men in suits sat across from them, both of them reading their papers and seemingly unaware that there were now people sitting in front of them.

It was midday by the time they had left the town, so they wouldn't be arriving in Magnolia until late in the afternoon. Again, the train ride was mostly quiet. Lucy seemed to be staring out at the hills as the train rushed past them, and Bickslow looked like he was staring up at the ceiling of the carriage.

About an hour had passed, and Lucy began yawning again. Something about trains made her just want to sleep, especially when it was going to be a long trip. Bickslow looked down at her. She seemed to be struggling to keep her eyes open at this point.

"You can… you can use me as a pillow again, if you want." He swallowed as he said it; his throat had suddenly gone dry. It wasn't every day he offered to be used as a human pillow. Lucy looked up at him; her cheeks were tinged with a light pink.

"It's okay… I didn't mean to do it last time…" She turned to look out the window again, trying to hide the deepening blush on her cheeks. She was surprised that he had even offered. _Why is he being so nice all of a sudden? Isn't he supposed to be some creepy pervert?_ She thought to herself.

"Suit yourself." Bickslow went back to looking at the ceiling of the carriage. He wasn't sure how long had passed before he felt the weight of something leaning on his side once again. He looked down to see it was the blonde, and he couldn't help but smirk. He lifted his arm from under her slowly before he moved it around and placed it on the side of her arm gently, softly pulling her in closer to him. She tensed at the contact for a second, before realising that it was strangely comforting and relaxed into it. He closed his eyes and relaxed too, also enjoying the strange comfort of having her under his arm.

* * *

Bickslow never managed to fall asleep for very long on the train. He would occasionally feel Lucy shuffle and he would look down to make sure she was actually asleep, and he couldn't help but smile softly when he saw how comfortable she seemed. The men opposite them read their papers the entire time, barely making a noise.

 _Why am I enjoying this? Why do I want to pull her in and never let go? Why… why_ her? Bickslow's mind was overrun with thoughts and questions all relating to the blonde. He didn't know what was going on, and it was driving him insane. _This is not who you are, Bickslow… or maybe, it is?_ He sighed and leant his head back. He needed to push all of these thoughts back, yet again. He didn't need to be having an argument with himself in his mind.

Bickslow closed his eyes once his head hit the headrest, only to be greeted by the memory of Lucy and himself in the forest, both of them covered in the mud from their fall, with the rain washing only a small amount of it away. He remembered looking down at her, staring down at her brown eyes and the feeling of almost getting lost in them, and reaching out to push the hair out of her face. He remembered her blush as she turned away, and he remembered that he had questioned his actions.

He remembered that it took almost everything he had to not kiss her right there.

* * *

 **I like having single lines at the end of chapters that just make me scream internally (Well, it did for me, anyway). I don't usually do cute, but I'm trying.**

 **Anyway, please remember to review so I know what you guys think of it and what I can improve on!**

 **Also - I proof-read this at like 9am so I apologise if there's any mistakes. I'm not a morning person in the slightest and someone in my house used up the last of my coffee, sigh.**

 **Alas, time for me to stop rambling and go. *waves***

 **\- April**


	4. Chapter 4

**So I thought I'd get this one up a little earlier today (while I'm on the computer for once and not lying in bed reading Free! fanfic or Ao no Exorcist manga.**

 **Anyway. I've uploaded a lot of the chapters so I don't have to go in and upload them each week, so I honestly don't remember what happens in this chapter, but I know that it's starting to get a little more fun from this point onward. :D**

 **Disclaimer: Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail, and I'm already bored of typing that out every week so I won't be adding it anymore.**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

"Lucy?"

"Mmm…"

"Hey, Cosplayer."

"What do you want?" Lucy mumbled into the man's side. She felt him laugh softly.

"You need to get off of me so we can get off the train."

"But I don't want to, it's warm here." She felt him laugh again as the arm around her moved.

Bickslow looked down at the girl who had no intentions of leaving his side. _This is getting too weird_. As he moved the arm that was around her shoulder, he stood up slowly and then put his hands on either side of Lucy, lifting her up so she was now standing too. Suddenly, her eyes shot open as she realised she had been pulled up and she looked at the man before her. Bickslow removed her hands from her shoulders as he realised she was now at least somewhat awake and was able to stand on her own without falling over.

Lucy quickly looked down at her feet, "Uh… sorry, again…"

Bickslow turned his head to look at her again, "It's fine," he mumbled, "We better get going now, though." He turned once again and headed down the carriage, Lucy following just behind him.

Once outside the station, Lucy realised that she was still wearing Bickslow's cloak. She unclasped it at the front and unwrapped herself from it, slightly sad as the vague smell of cinnamon and something sweeter disappeared with it, "Thanks for letting me wear that." She smiled as she held it in her hand and offered it to Bickslow who took it and just nodded.

Bickslow placed it back on his own shoulders, embracing the familiar warmth from it. The two walked in silence once again through the streets of Magnolia before Bickslow broke the silence, "Are you heading to the guild?"

"Not today, I'm just going to head home and make sure Natsu or Happy haven't broken in if they're back yet." She shuddered at the thought of finding her apartment destroyed with the two of them passed out on the floor somewhere.

"Well, in that case, I'll see you later then."

Lucy nodded and began to veer off to head down a different street that led to her apartment, "Bye, Bickslow."

Bickslow had begun walking towards the guild after he saw Lucy head towards the other street, "See ya, Lucy." He paused in his tracks. _Lucy? Why did I say Lucy all of a sudden?_ Hoping that she didn't hear it and was out of earshot, he shook his head and continued walking.

Lucy blushed as he said her name, rather than 'Cosplayer,' and stepped onto the edge of the canal and began walking towards her home.

* * *

Bickslow walked through the doors to the guildhall and looked around. A lot of people were still out on jobs so it was strangely quiet, probably because it was missing a certain Dragon Slayer, Ice Mage, and Titania. He spotted a familiar blonde sitting at the bar with Mira and the Master and made his way over there, taking a seat next to Laxus as he placed his helmet on the bar in front of him. He nodded thanks to Mira as she placed a mug in front of him and he took a sip from it.

Laxus was now watching Bickslow, his nose slightly scrunched up, "Why do you smell like strawberries?"

"What?"

Laxus turned to Mira, "He smells like strawberries now, right?" Mira just shrugged with her usual smile and walked down the other end of the bar.

"He smells like strawberries." Bickslow turned to his other side to see their Iron Dragon Slayer now on the seat next to him, an amused look on his face. He looked down at himself, trying to think what they were talking about. He reached his hand up to pull the edge of his cloak up to his nose, and instantly paled before his cheeks became dusted with a light pink as he realised that he actually did smell like strawberries – or more accurately, it was his cloak that smelled like strawberries.

"What the hell was that?" Laxus demanded as he watched one of his best friends blush. It wasn't very often that it happened. He hadn't even blushed when the man had walked in on him in some very compromising positions, instead he usually just grinned and told the blonde to close the door on his way out.

"What was what?" Bickslow turned back to the mug in front him and took a swig from it, instantly regretting his decision to not have his hood and visor on at the current time. _Goddamn Cosplayer_ , he had said under his breath. It was her fault he now smelled like strawberries.

Laxus and Gajeel suddenly started laughing and Bickslow's face lost all colour again. He moved the mug in his hand before slamming his head down on the bar, only for it to warrant more laughing from the two dragon slayers on either side.

"So, are you going to explain why you now smell like strawberries?"

"I let her wear it since she was getting cold." He mumbled into the bench. He knew they could still hear him, and he mentally hit himself again for always forgetting about their heightened senses.

"I bet there's a certain bluenette who would love to hear this bit of information, gi-hi.' And with that, Gajeel sauntered off towards where Levy sat with her nose in a book, leaving Bickslow alone at that portion of the bar with Laxus and Makarov who had remained silent for the time being.

"So… any problems with the job?"

Bickslow turned his head to look at the small man sitting on the bar on the other side of the Laxus. He had completely forgotten he was there, "No," he mumbled again, "it was boring as all hell, but the weather was terrible. Ended up falling down and getting covered in mud with Cosplayer." Bickslow mentally slapped himself again and just groaned, regretting the fact that he had kept talking and hating his mouth for saying open. He closed his eyes to avoid the questioning glare from Laxus, "Don't even say anything."

A small shriek came from what Bickslow assumed was Levy, followed by Gajeel's distinct laugh, and he heard Laxus start talking to the master once again. Bickslow sighed with relief as the topic had finally shifted off of him, strawberries, and the job.

"Is Lucy going to be coming in tonight?" Bickslow opened one eye to see Mira standing before him, cleaning a cup with a cloth.

"Why are you asking me this?"

"Because you were the last one to see her."

Bickslow just groaned again. He knew it was just a friendly question and it had nothing to do with his previous job. _Nothing. At. All._ "Doubt she is. She said she was going home to make sure Natsu hadn't broken in or something."

Bickslow spent most of his night sitting at the bar with Laxus. Freed, Elfman, and Evergreen had returned later in the night, with Freed instantly rushing over to the Lightning Dragon Slayer and the Seith mage, thankful to be able to talk to anyone other than the Take-Over mage and the self-proclaimed Fairy Queen.

"Never let Cana choose teams again," The green haired mage gulped down a large portion from the mug that Mira had placed in front of him, "ever."

The three men now sat in silence. Makarov had retreated upstairs to work on paperwork, and Mira was talking to Cana who was sitting down the other end.

"Is it just me, or does something smell like strawberries?" Freed looked around himself, trying to find where the smell was coming from. Laxus let out a booming laugh.

"No." Bickslow didn't try and cover the scowl on his face. Instead, he picked up his helmet and put it back on his head before heading towards the guild doors, and walking back out in to the streets of Magnolia.

"Did I miss something?" Freed turned back to face Laxus who had an amused expression on his face.

"Nothing much."

* * *

Lucy was pleased to find that her house was still orderly when she returned home that afternoon, finding no signs that Natsu or the blue Exceed had been anywhere near it recently. She sighed contentedly and collapsed onto her bed, turning her head to look at the sunset through her window. She stared out her window for a while, eventually losing track of the time as she watched the sky turn dark. With a yawn, she absent-mindedly undid her belt and put her belt, keys, and whip on her bedside table before switching off the table-lamp and climbing into her bed, smiling to herself at the comfort of being in her own bed again as she fell asleep.

She giggled as she felt something brushing on the side of her neck, and she figured it was either going to be Natsu or Happy while she was sleeping, "Natsu, stop being weird, that tickles."

"Mhmm, does it?"

Lucy opened her eyes when she realised it wasn't Natsu or Happy, only to see the blue-and-black hair that belonged to only one person she knew of. She felt hands trailing down her sides, stopping at her hips as the man met her gaze with his.

"I'm going to ignore the fact you called me Natsu." Bickslow had said, his mouth trailing over her collarbone as she leant back into her mattress. She couldn't help but let out a soft moan as one hand trailed lower down her side and was now resting on the back of her thigh as she closed her eyes again.

Lucy felt him move himself up, his face now above her own. Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling his lips to hers as he smirked slightly. Bickslow had moved his hands back up around her waist and had rolled them over so he was now on his back, not breaking the kiss. Lucy's hands went up to his head, getting them tangled in amongst the blue of his hair. Their lips moving over each other, before Bickslow's trailed off to the side, tracing her jaw with his mouth as Lucy leant her head back.

And then she opened her eyes.

Lucy sat up abruptly, the blanket pooling around her hips. She could see that the sun was rising through the window, and that she was alone on the bed. She looked around the room quickly, _nope, definitely alone_. Lucy sighed and fell back down on the bed. _What the hell was that dream? And why was it with_ Bickslow _? Where did it even_ come _from?_ With a groan, she picked up the pillow next to her and held it over her face, rolling over on to her side and hiding her embarrassment beneath the pillow, despite her being alone in her house.

The blonde Celestial Spirit mage rolled out of bed when the noise level outside rose, everyone was getting ready for work and heading out for the day. In a way she was thankful for Loke not being her alarm clock for the day. He would have found a way to press the information from her about why her face was the colour of Erza's hair. She slowly made her way into her bathroom, filling her stone bath with the hot water and her favourite strawberry scented bubble bath. She sighed as she stepped into it while it was still filling up, sinking down into the bath even more and instantly becoming warm. Warm like she had been when she woke up next to Bickslow in the inn. Warm like she had been when she woke up later that day on the train, with his arm wrapped around her. Lucy slid her head under the water for a few seconds, pushing all thoughts of him away before resurfacing and slicking her hair back as she came up. Now was not to the time be thinking about that. She didn't even want to know _why_ she had been thinking of that again.

Lucy sighed when she realised it was time to get out of the bath and get ready for the day. She wondered if Natsu, Gray, or Erza would be back today. _I wonder if Bickslow will be there_? She brought her palm up to her forehead and hit it gently, but hard it enough to leave a slight red mark.

She made her way outside eventually and stepped onto the edge of the canal, Plue walking just in front of her.

"Be careful, Miss Lucy!" The men in the boat yelled as they went past her, Lucy just smiled with a wave before returning her arms to their horizontal position at her sides as she walked along the edge.

* * *

The guild was quiet in the mornings, but that never surprised her since the majority all drank late into the night before stumbling home to sleep for the most of the morning. Lucy made her way over to the bar to talk to her favourite barmaid, Mira.

"Good morning Lucy!" The white-haired mage had greeted her with her bright smile.

"Hey, Mira!" Lucy waved as she walked towards the bar, taking a seat before her and next to Cana who appeared to be passed out.

"The usual breakfast?"

"Yes please," the blonde said with a smile as Mira turned to get her order ready, "Did Natsu and the rest come back yesterday?"

"Not yesterday. They should all be due back today though." Mira turned back around as she placed the strawberry milkshake and the vanilla yogurt with strawberry slices and oats in front of the blonde.

"Thanks, Mira!" Lucy took a sip of the shake. Mira's strawberry shakes were to die for, as well as her cooking. She ate in silence, giggling with Mira when she heard Cana mumble something about Bacchus in her sleep.

It wasn't too long before the guild started to fill up. Wakaba and Macao sat at the table, seemingly complaining about the younger generation; Nab stood at the request board, looking for the one that only he could do; Gajeel sat with Lily while eating scrap pieces of metal; Elfman and Lisanna had joined Lucy at the bar and were talking to Mira.

Makarov had come down the stairs and had taken a seat next to Lucy, "Welcome back, Lucy. Thank you for not destroying anything." The master winked, knowing that it was usually the other three that were the culprits for causing all the destruction.

Lucy still blushed, "Yes, well…" The blonde was about to continue when the guild doors burst open to reveal a somewhat traumatised looking Wendy and Carla, with Erza following just behind.

"Speaking of 'destroying things…'" Makarov mumbled as he watched them all sit down – Wendy seemed to be trying to get as far away from Erza as possible, "Well, my child, I have more paperwork to fill out and apology letters to send off." Lucy watched as he hopped down from the bench and headed towards the stairs again.

With the master's departure, Lucy made her way over to where Erza sat, making sure to sit on the opposite side of the table to avoid the dark aura that was flowing from the mage.

"So, Erza… how was the job?"

"That town would not be able to see a brilliant actress if she were to hit them in the face." Erza folded her arms across her chest.

"And… did you hit them across the face?" Lucy was scared of the answer, but she had a feeling she already knew it.

"Of course! Those fools are blind. They cannot be helped."

Mira, sensing the furious Erza, carefully made her way over to the table and placed a slice of cake down in front of the scarlet-haired woman, her dark aura disappearing completely and her hand now holding a fork, eyes staring down at the cake. Lucy couldn't help but laugh at the immediate mood change. Erza was definitely an odd one.

Erza was just about done with her cake when the guild doors were flung open again. Gray and Natsu walked in, both of them covered in bandages.

"Gray. Natsu." The loud voice of the master resonated throughout the hall, everyone freezing or trying to sneak out various doors or windows.

"Gramps?" Natsu had called back, obviously not entirely sensing the mood.

"Not only did you two brats destroy their hideout and half of the forest surrounding it, but you managed to destroy the majority of their town. The council wants my head!" Makarov held a large pile of papers in his hand, his eye twitching with rage. A few nervous laughs from around the guild were heard.

"He started it!" Natsu cried out.

"Did not, flame-breath!"

"Shut up, ice-prick!" The two were arguing yet again, and somehow a chair had been thrown. Lucy wondered where the chair came from...

Erza stood up as she finished her cake and moved towards the two still fighting. With one kick, the two were sent through the door that had just been opened again, and past a Laxus who didn't bat an eyelid as they flew past him when walking through the door, Freed taking a step back to avoid the ball that was ice and fire. Erza returned to the table, smiling as she sat down. Happy had made his way over to where Wendy and Carla were, and was in the process of offering Carla a fish.

* * *

Bickslow had been lying in his bed most of the morning, staring up at the ceiling with his arms crossed under his head. Laxus and Freed had barged into his room just before they left (well, Laxus did – Freed stood in the doorway), opening up his blinds and demanding that the Seith mage get up and be productive. Bickslow had grunted, his version of saying "no," and had pulled the sheet up over his head to block the sunlight that was now streaming into the room. The two had given up and eventually left, leaving Bickslow alone in the room once again.

He didn't know how long he had been staring at the ceiling, nor did he know what time it actually was. He could see his cloak hanging on a hook on the back of his door, and his mind was instantly overrun by thoughts of a certain blonde. _What the hell is going on here? Why are you in my thoughts, Cosplayer?_ Bickslow was getting frustrated with his own mind. On one hand, he wanted to know why he couldn't get her out of his mind, but on the other, he wanted to run from whatever that answer might be. _No, it can't be that. No chance at all._ _You're only like this because you just spent twenty-four hours with someone you know next to nothing about. You're just curious. Right?_

 _It has to be the latter._

 _But that doesn't explain why you_ literally _fell head over heels for her in the mud, when you can balance on a flagpole or even hang upside down from a cable._

 _Or why you wanted to kiss her._

"God damn it, Cosplayer. What are you doing to me?" The Seith mage groaned and pulled his hands down his face, resting them on the sides over his jaw, continuing to stare at the ceiling.

More time went by before he decided to pull himself out of bed. The thought of seeing the blonde at the guild made him want to crawl back into his bed and stare at the ceiling some more, but then he'd probably still be battling with his own mind. _Maybe she won't be there?_ Bickslow laughed at himself as he pulled on his clothes. _She's the 'light of the guild', of course she's going to fucking be there._

Bickslow pulled his cloak over his shoulders, frowning when he realised it still had a slight scent of strawberries. Hoping that it wouldn't be as bad by the time he had reached the guild, he walked out his front door and headed in the direction of the guild.

* * *

It was the middle of the day when he reached the guild, and almost all of the teams and pairs had returned by now so it near its usual noise level. He nodded to Nab as he walked in, heading towards the bar before making his way over to Laxus with a drink in his hand. If you weren't drinking or eating, there was probably something wrong with you when it came to being in Fairy Tail.

Laxus was listening to his sound-pod, his eyes closed as he sat with one arm over the back of the bench and the other on the table, one leg crossed over the other. The lightning Dragon Slayer opened one eye as he heard someone approaching over his music. He saw Bickslow slouch in the bench opposite him.

"Say anything about or related to strawberries and I'm going to kill you."

Laxus smirked at the man, "you can try."

Bickslow's gaze wandered around the hall, trying to find the other two members of the Raijinshuu. He spotted Freed behind a pile of books with Levy, and Evergreen was arguing with Elfman at the bar yet again. It was more or less a usual day for Fairy Tail. As he slowly returned his eyes to the mug in front of him, he couldn't help but spot the blonde Celestial Spirit mage, who had instantly blushed when she realised he was looking back at her.

"What the hell was that?"

Bickslow turned back to face Laxus who was now staring between the other blonde and himself, "What are you talking about?"

"Blondie just blushed when you looked at her."

"I was not looking at her. We've been through this before." Bickslow lifted up the mug to his lips before tilting it upwards to drink from it. _Why_ did _she blush?_

"You were so. Am I missing something here? Don't make me bring Ever over here. You know she'll get it out of you."

Bickslow couldn't help but tense at the mention of the female Raijinshuu member. She would either torture you to find something out, or turn you to stone. Neither were pleasant, and he had been on the receiving end of both methods, "You wouldn't. She's busy with the giant over there," he motioned towards the bar with the tilt of his head, "and besides, there's nothing else to say."

He felt his face drop as Laxus smiled deviously, "Evergreen!" He bellowed across the hall. Bickslow turned to see the woman look up at the mention of her name. She glared at Elfman before she began to walk over to the table. Laxus was still smirking when the self-proclaimed Fairy Queen arrived, her hands resting on the table as she looked between the two men.

"What is it?"

"Bickslow here has some information he is keeping from us."

Evergreen moved so fast to sit next to Bickslow that he didn't even have a chance to follow her movement with his eyes, "I do not."

He could feel Evergreen staring at him, despite not actually looking at her. Instead, he was staring back at Laxus who looked like a kid on Christmas Day.

"Bickslow, what would you prefer today?" He closed his eyes and swallowed, his throat feeling uncomfortably dry again. Laxus was going to pay for this.

"Just turn me to stone and be done with it. At least that way I'll have all the ladies staring at this fine piece of artwork." In an attempt to lighten the mood, he stuck his tongue out in a grin, half-heartedly posing.

"Hmm. Sorry Bicks, can't do that. Now I know you're _definitely_ hiding something." Evergreen had starting pulling off his helmet. Bickslow just shuffled in his chair and waited for her to remove it – preparing himself to sprint out of the guild as soon as he was free from her grasp. "Don't think of running, either." Evergreen's voice had a hint of amusement to it. He often wondered if she had a tertiary magic that allowed her to read minds. He couldn't bear to think it was her 'woman's intuition.'

* * *

Natsu and Happy had dragged Lucy over to the request board after she suggested they go on a job since all of the reward money from Natsu's last job had gone to repairs for the town they destroyed.

"Hey, Luce. What about this one?" Natsu pointed to a flyer on the board.

Lucy frowned when she read it, "It's guarding something in the cargo-hold of a train, you idiot."

"Hmm," Natsu held his hand on his chin, looking over more of the requests. Happy had pulled down one from the top of the board and held it before Natsu. The pinkette grinned and held it in front of Lucy's face, "let's do this one!"

Lucy pulled the request from Natsu's hand and read it when she heard Laxus' booming laugh across the hall. She turned to look at him along with other members of the guild, curious as to what was so entertaining to make him laugh like that, "I'm sorry, continue." She heard Laxus say as he wiped a tear from his eye, still laughing slightly. Lucy noticed that Evergreen's jaw was hanging down and was almost touching the ground, and Bickslow just shuffled and looked uncomfortable. _What the hell is going on over there?_

She turned back to the request in her hand, pleased to find out that I was actually a decent job. All they had to do was help clean up an old shop that was getting re-opened. The pay was decent enough, and her share would allow her to pay her rent that was due soon. She just had to hope that Natsu wouldn't destroy the shop in the process of tidying it.

"Come on Natsu, we can get this done today!" Lucy smiled at him before going over to the bar to let Mira know they were taking the job.

"Have fun, Lucy!" The white-haired mage smiled and waved at her friend as they walked out of the guild and headed towards the shop.

* * *

"Are you kidding me?!" Evergreen had shrieked once Bickslow had finished his story. He hadn't wanted to, but he was terrified of Evergreen, and he wasn't going to verbally admit that to anyone but Laxus or Freed who were equally as terrified of the woman sometimes.

Bickslow's hands went up to his ears, "Ever, watch the ears, alright?"

"Sorry, sorry… but, seriously?"

"Good thing you like strawberries, then." Bickslow turned his attention to Laxus and glared at the blonde man who was just smirking as usual.

"Shut up, Sparky." The nickname just warranted a short laugh from said 'Sparky.'

"Alright, alright. Your secret is safe with me, but I doubt it is with Ever."

"You two are terrible." The Seith mage mumbled, realising that his cup was already long empty and he couldn't even drown his embarrassment in booze.

Evergreen had eventually left once she realised they weren't going to say any more, returning to Elfman and a Mira who wanted to know what all the commotion had been about. Evergreen being Evergreen couldn't help but let her in on a few details, Mira fidgeting with delight at the thought of being able to tease some more people.

Bickslow sighed and pushed himself up from the table. It was either go home, wander around Magnolia aimlessly, or go and get more alcohol. He had no intentions of doing the former, so he had to go and see Mira. He figured Evergreen was already gossiping, but unlike Laxus, he wasn't able to hear conversations from the other side of the room, not that you could hear anything over the noise of everyone else in the room anyway.

His assumptions were correct as he saw the mischievous glint in Mira's eyes as he asked her for beer. He had seen that look many times before. It was usually the day after Mira had seen him exiting a bar with a random woman (or women), while walking to their respective homes. He could tell that she was just planning weddings and parties in her mind when she had that look, or ways to torture him, but after a while it had stopped after she had seen him one too many times, and it just became something to be expected of when seeing Bickslow after dark when he wasn't in the guild.

But this time it was different, and he knew it. Ignoring the stares from the two women at the bar, he turned and walked back to his table.

"Blondie went on a job with flame-for-brains."

"Okay?" Bickslow inwardly sighed in relief that she wasn't in the guild anymore, meaning there was no chance of any more awkward encounters for the rest of the day (or so he could hope).

"She's not here, so now you can tell me what you're going to do about your new issue."

"Laxus, I really have no idea what you talk about half the time."

The blonde sighed, removing the headphones and placing them on the table, "You're not acting like the usual pervert you are, and from what I just heard, you haven't been since you went on that job. Don't tell me you actually _like_ Blondie?"

 _Pfft, no. Of course not... right?_

Bickslow could only wonder why Laxus was so interested all of a sudden. It wasn't like him to care about the personal lives of those around him, much less his own life half the time. Instead of thinking of a response, he just shrugged his shoulders.

"You've got to have some sort of plan, at least?" Laxus was almost sounding desperate at this point, waiting for his friend to just spill everything he was holding inside. He knew it was going to happen at some point since the Seith mage was not usually one for being quiet or keeping anything to himself, and the fact that he wasn't acting anything like his usual self just meant that when he finally cracked and let everything loose, it was going to be _very_ entertaining to Laxus. He wouldn't admit to anyone that he was actually interested in his friend's new-found interest for Blondie.

"A plan for what?"

"Jesus, dude. How hard is it? What are you going to do with Blondie?" Bickslow couldn't help but flinch. He was grateful that the blonde was still being quiet compared to the rest of the guild, but it still came out as a demanding-whisper and when Laxus was mad, it was scary.

"Nothing."

"No, you're going to do something. You always have a plan. I know you, Bickslow."

Bickslow thought for a moment. Multiple things crossed his mind, none of which he would never say to anyone. He had remembered that Laxus had commented on his character as of late, so in order to _try_ and fool the Dragon Slayer, he could only think of one thing to say.

"Get her drunk and take her home and make her beg for more while screaming my name." He had realised as soon as the first word has left his mouth that Laxus wasn't going to fall for it, but instead the words kept coming out. He couldn't even make it somewhat convincing with his grin. Not only that, but Bickslow almost hated himself for even saying the words and that just made him all the more confused.

"Try again."

Bickslow sighed and took a deep breath, "I don't have a plan because I don't know what's going on and it's pissing me off that none of you will leave me alone about it, because I don't even have time to think about what _it_ actually is, not that there's a chance that it's actually anything. Just... confused." He trailed off into silence as he admitted it to himself, more than Laxus. _There's no way it's a thing... or an 'it'. It's just curiosity because I don't know her... right?_

And there it was. Laxus couldn't help but smile softly as he sat back on the bench, folding his arms across his chest, "About fucking time." He mumbled, only to receive a glare from Bickslow before he had dropped his head to the table, hiding his ever-increasing blush.

* * *

 **Sigh. I had to add a few things here and there, but now that I'm reading it again I'm not entirely happy with it. I don't know, I think I kind of rushed the whole 'do I like her?' aspect of it, but I'll try and slow it down. I have plans for the chapters I'm working on now, but I can't really mention any of that yet.**

 **Anyway. Please feel free to point out any errors, mistakes, etc. And review! I like reviews!**  
 **Be as mean as you want, I dare you to! I enjoy the feedback.**

 **Until next week (or maybe during the week if I feel kind enough since this has a bit of a cliffhanger... not as bad as another one coming up though, muahaha).**

 **\- April**


	5. Chapter 5

**What can I say? I felt like putting this chapter up because I had so much fun writing it. I'm just going to throw the uploading schedule out the window.**

 **Kurahieiritr JIO - Thank you for another review! I forgot to reply to your last one, but I can say that the return of the mysterious storm definitely has good consequences. ;)**  
 **Also, I'm honestly having too much fun writing the awkwardness of Bickslow's thoughts. These don't count as spoilers, right? I don't even know. But anyway, I find them entertaining.**

 **CelticHeart13 - I'm glad it's not too fast then! I'm having to go back and re-write a few things here and there, but for the time being the entire thing is going to be jumping around a bit. Again, not really spoilers, right? This is honestly where it picks up and starts getting maybe a little bit too rushed but... eh. I'll fix the upcoming chapters.**

* * *

 _Why can't I keep my stupid mouth shut, the one time I need it to be shut?_ The Seith mage groaned into the table. He knew his friend was finding it amusing, and deep down he was glad that he had told someone. Bickslow still mostly hated himself for letting his feelings get out in the open.

"I don't… that's not what I meant." The man mumbled into the table.

"I think it's exactly what you meant."

Bickslow raised his head to look at Laxus, with his head now resting in his hands and his elbows on the table while leaning forward, "It's not even an _it_. It's nothing." The words were there mostly for his own benefit, but he was still in a battle with himself about whether or not he wanted to run or hide from the truth that he had just blurted out.

"Go talk to her," Laxus' voice was gentle - comforting, even. Bickslow rarely heard him with that tone, "you're not going to get anywhere if you can't figure it out, and you obviously can't do it on your own."

"She's not even here."

"Then go and find her."

"I'm not going to go and find her. There's no point." Bickslow ran his finger around the top of the mug in front of him. "There's nothing to talk about, and even if there were, she's been chasing Natsu for god knows how long." _Yeah, nice one. Make it seem like you're jealous. That's totally going to help get the spark-plug off your back._

"The Salamander is too stupid to see what's right in front of him, and she's not even 'chasing Natsu' as you put it."

"Whatever." Bickslow pushed himself up from the bench; "I'm just going to go home, I'll see you later." The last few words were mumbled as he headed towards the doors. _Maybe I'll just see how many pubs I can visit in one night again._

Bickslow was already out the doors when Gajeel made his way over to where Laxus still sat, "So, him and Bunny Girl, hey?" The two men smirked at each other.

* * *

Lucy looked around at the mostly neat interior of the shop. All of the counters and most of the windows sparkled, apart from the one that Natsu had gone through when Happy threw a lacrima and he had completely missed it, thus diving through the window to try and still catch it. After that incident, Lucy had made them sit outside and wait before they broke anything else.

She pulled the door closed behind her, hearing it click as it locked. She frowned as she looked at the broken window before turning and looking at Natsu and Happy who were sulking on the bench opposite it, "Come on, the owner should be in his other store a few streets over."

"Aye, Lucy!" Happy jumped up from where he sat with Natsu and was flying next to Lucy's head, gnawing on a fish that Lucy wondered when he got.

The walk to the other shop was a short one, and the streets were thankfully not busy since the day was drawing to a close and everyone was closing up. Lucy looked up at the sky that was tinged with various hues of red, orange, and pink, smiling at the sunset.

The bell rang on the door as they all walked into the small shop, the owner popping his head up from under the counter and smiling as he recognised the Fairy Tail mages, "Ah, you must be the ones that took my request! I assume it is complete, yes?"

Lucy rubbed her hand on the back of her neck sheepishly – a habit she had picked up from the infamous Salamander, "Well, uh… yes, but… there may be a broken window and lacrima…" She looked down at the floor as she mumbled. It was always Lucy's job to break the bad news to the client, despite it never being her fault, but by this point she was used to it. She couldn't remember a job where she didn't have to inform the client that something had been broken or completely destroyed. _There was that job you did the other day… with Bickslow._ A slight blush formed on her cheeks at the memory of the job and everything that had followed in the twenty-four hours after it.

"Hmph. Well. The reward will be reduced to cover the damages." The man frowned as he turned to go around the back of the shop. Lucy glared at Natsu who was still sulking, apparently disappointed that he had sat doing nothing for most of the afternoon.

The owner returned a few minutes later with an envelope in his hand, "You only get 50% of the original reward."

Lucy grabbed the envelope from the man and placed it in her small bag, "My apologies again, sir."

"Now if you don't mind, I'd like to close up for the day," He nodded towards the door, "and please don't break anything on your way o-," He was interrupted by the sound of something falling from a shelf and shattering on the ground. Happy had flown out the door as fast as he could with Natsu running just behind him. Lucy could just smile awkwardly while offering the man some jewel notes to cover the cost of whatever the two had just broken.

Lucy caught up to Natsu and Happy and the three headed towards the guild once again. By now, everyone would be at least a little tipsy so it was a good place to unwind and let loose for the night. It was fun – she would admit that any time – but she usually had to leave earlier than she wanted, mostly dragging Natsu with her so he didn't destroy anything else or get in a fight with Gray or Gajeel.

* * *

Bickslow couldn't remember how many bars he had been to since leaving the guild. He didn't know what the time was, but he knew it was late since the only things open were the various pubs that littered the streets. He had told Laxus he was going home, which wasn't exactly a lie. He just happened to be stopping by as many bars as he could on his route to his house.

By this point in the night, he was stumbling along the cobblestone streets as he made his way over to the last bar for the night. He had always loved this bar – they didn't kick him out when he got too drunk; and it was close to his home so it was a short walk and that was always welcome considering he was usually escorting an equally drunk woman home with him.

He took a seat at the bar, the bartender walking over to him, "Hey –hic– Cade."

"Good evening, Bickslow. Want your usual?" Bickslow could just nod as he tried to remain steady on the stool. He had fallen from it countless times, and his padded clothing could only stop so much pain. The man slid the mug across the bar after he had filled it up, and it stopped right in front of Bickslow. He downed half of it in one gulp as he looked around the bar, grinning slightly as everyone seemed to be having a good time. Sure, it didn't come anywhere close to when Fairy Tail got wild, but it was close enough.

"Hey, you." Bickslow turned to see a woman now sitting next to him.

"Why, hello there." His grin widened as his tongue lolled from his mouth.

"How about we get out of here?"

Bickslow tried his best to make it seem like he was pouting, "Aw, but I only just got here."

"I guess I'll just go talk to someone else then…" The woman's finger trailed along his shoulder as she stepped away slowly. Bickslow grinned once again, finishing the rest of the drink before slamming it down on the bar.

"Add it to my tab." The bartender nodded as Bickslow stood and placed his arm around the girl's shoulders. She giggled as they headed towards the door.

The two walked through the streets, both of them slightly stumbling and giggling in their drunkenness.

"What's your name, handsome?" Bickslow turned his head to look down at the woman next to him. Her blonde hair looked dull in the moonlight and it made it look more white than blonde. He looked lower down, seeing her dark blue dress stop that clung to her body stop halfway down her thighs. He smiled at looked back up at her face.

"Bickslow. You'll be –hic– screaming it later," his grin almost as bright as the moon itself, "What about you?"

"My name's not important."

Bickslow chuckled; he liked the mysterious ones. He looked up at the street signs and turned down the one his house was on, "My house is closer." The woman giggled again as she followed Bickslow down the street.

* * *

Laxus walked down the street the next morning with his hands in his pockets and his sound-pod over his ears. It was still way too early, but he had a job for him and the Raijinshuu to go on and he had wanted to leave as early as possible. He had already told Freed and Evergreen about it the night before, but Bickslow had left before he had found the job so it meant waking him up.

The man was about to turn to use the steps leading up to the door of Bickslow's building when he saw a blonde woman coming out, her heels in her hand as she hopped down the stairs and briskly walked past Laxus. He had seen this happen many times before, but he realised that there was something different about this one – namely the fact that the blonde looked a lot like a certain celestial mage in the guild.

Bickslow was lying on his stomach, tangled up in the black sheets and facing away from the door when he heard it open. He knew it was Laxus when he could feel the hairs on the back of his neck rise from the static electricity in the air.

"Who was that?" Laxus asked as he looked around the room. The dark purple blanket from the bed was half on the bed and half on the ground; Bickslow's clothes that he had been wearing the day before were scattered around the floor; a lacy pink bra hanging on a lampshade on the opposite side of the bed.

"Who was who?" Bickslow mumbled into the pillow, shielding his eyes as Laxus opened the curtains, sunlight spilling into the room. His head was pounding as he was still dealing with all of the alcohol from the previous night.

"The blonde who just scampered out of the building." Laxus picked the pink bra up from the lampshade, holding it up before him and eyeing it with distaste before he sent a current of electricity to his hand and fried it completely, throwing what was left of it into the small bin that was in the bathroom to the side of Bickslow's room.

Bickslow groaned into the pillow. He just wanted Laxus to leave already so he could go back to sleep and wallow in the darkness for the rest of the day, "No idea. I didn't catch her name."

Laxus figured he could go one of two ways with it. He could pester him until he eventually got out of bed while asking if he had gone and talked to Blondie, or he could fuck with his friend. Laxus chose the latter.

"Well, luckily for you I know her name, and so does the rest of the guild."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I believe it begins with an 'L', or a 'C' depending on what name you use."

Bickslow thought for a moment, his mind was still foggy from the night before. Bickslow was the kind of person who could somehow remember his drunken nights the morning after, and that was something that could either be a blessing or a curse. The only person he could think of at the time was Cana. That would explain the whole drunk thing, "Cana?"

"Cana isn't blonde you idiot."

"Well, I don't fucking know. Enlighten me so I can go back to bed." He groaned into the pillow again, feeling his headache getting worse the more he talked.

"I believe she likes strawberries." Laxus' tone was laced with amusement. Oh, was he going to have fun with this.

 _Strawberries. Who the hell likes strawberries and has a name beginning with 'L' or 'C?'_

 _Cosplayer._

Bickslow could feel all of the blood drain from his face as he sat up from the bed a little too fast, the room spinning around him, _"You've got to be kidding me."_ He was staring at Laxus who seemed to be having way too much fun watching his friend's reaction.

"I saw it with my own eyes."

"No. It's impossible. She's never even been to Cade's bar before." _Or had she? Was I that drunk that I didn't even recognise Cosplayer?_

Laxus shrugged and watched Bickslow try and piece together his memories of the night, "I don't see what the problem is. You've been staring at her from across the guildhall for weeks – and don't even try and say that you haven't been again, because I've seen you do it the entire time – and you quite obviously have a thing for Blondie. Are you trying to tell me that you actually don't and that you _don't_ want to sleep with her?"

"No, I just…" Bickslow closed his eyes as images of his night flooded his memories. He was remembering smaller details now, now that he was focused on it, "It wasn't her, okay? It couldn't have been."

"How do you know?"

"Because the girl last night had blue eyes and the hair colour was wrong." Laxus raised an eyebrow as the man before him fell back down on his bed, his hands covering his face. "You're a terrible person, Laxus."

"I know." Laxus couldn't help but chuckle.

"So what are you doing here anyway?"

"I have a job."

"I'm not going."

"What?" The blonde man stood there in shock. This was the first time he had gone to Bickslow with a job, and the Seith mage had declined, "What do you mean you're not going?"

"I have a hangover and I'd rather stay in and sleep all day, and I don't particularly feel like being questioned by you three at the moment." Bickslow turned back to his side. At least he'd have no reason to go to the guild if Laxus and the other members of the Thunder God tribe were out of town. _At least I can avoid her._

"Well, suit yourself." Laxus turned and walked down the hallway towards the kitchen. If the man was in that kind of mood, there was no point of pestering him. He looked around on the bench for a notepad and something to write with. He ended up finding one under a pile of old job requests and bills, and quickly scrawled a note on it before walking back to Bickslow's room and sticking it on the table next to the man. "Don't do anything stupid."

Bickslow didn't respond. He heard the door to his room close and then the door to his apartment being slammed shut. He opened his eyes and reached out for the note that Laxus had placed next to him, his eyes taking a few moments to focus on the writing:

 _ **Back in three days – if you're not in the guild for the party at the end of the week, I'll sic Mira AND Ever on you.**_

 _ **Talk to Blondie.**_

He scrunched up the small piece of paper in his hand and threw it in a random direction, hearing it bounce off the wall and land somewhere in the room. _I'm not going to talk to her. I don't need to talk to her._

Bickslow repeated the words over and over in his head, forcing himself to believe them. The more he said them in his head, the more of thought of _her_. The man was stuck in a vicious cycle of running from the fact that he might actually like the blonde – how and why, he did not know considering he really did know nothing about her – and then denying it and acting like it was nothing.

But the more he thought about it, he was slowly getting used to the idea of actually liking someone and not just having countless meaningless one-night stands, and that terrified him.

Bickslow had been so lost in his thoughts over the last few days that he had completely forgotten about the party at the end of the week. Every so often after the Grand Magic Games, the guild would throw a massive pool party (weather permitting). It was open to everyone, including those from other guilds and even random people from around the town. Unfortunately, it was basically compulsory that those actually _in_ Fairy Tail attend. Bickslow always looked forward to these events. Everyone running around in swimsuits was basically his version of heaven. Whether or not he actually wanted to attend this time around, he was more scared of having both Mira and Ever torture him. It was bad enough that Evergreen had got the information out of him, but then she had to go and tell the demon herself. Bickslow still wasn't sure how much she knew, but it was enough to make him want to avoid the bar all together after that mischievous glare.

* * *

The next few days went by in a blur for both Bickslow and Lucy. Lucy had gone out on a job with the rest of her team. They were required to locate the leader of a large group of bandits and bring him in for custody, but the man was near impossible to catch so the reward was fairly high – assuming nothing got damaged or destroyed.

Bickslow mainly slept all day before heading out to bars for the night and bringing home someone different each night. He had made sure none of them had blonde hair in an attempt to forget about the blonde that was on his mind the entire time, and it seemed to work. By the day of the party, he was confident that he had gotten over it.

 _Just curiosity, right? Worst case scenario, it was a small crush. Nothing new... I'm fine. It's done._

Anyone out on a job had returned by the day of the festivities, as per the master's instructions. Many were already out by the pool enjoying the warm weather and getting drunk despite it still being before noon. Laxus had been surrounded by a group of random women from the city as he sat on the end of a lounge chair; Freed looked like he was about ready to rip them all off him; Evergreen had turned Elfman to stone at some point and was lying down on another lounge chair fanning herself.

Bickslow arrived around noon after he had woken up, thankful that his hangover wasn't as bad as it had been the previous days. He made his way through the guild to the pool area, seeing the place already buzzing with excitement. Any regrets he had about showing up today were long forgotten when he realised that this is where he belonged: with his family and friends.

The Seith mage sat down next to Laxus who was still surrounded by the girls, and he couldn't help but smile at the sight. The man never seemed interested in the swarm of girls he seemed to attract whenever he stopped moving, and he almost seemed bored with it. Granted, he never pushed any of them away. Bickslow could only feel a little bit envious towards his friend.

"I see you decided to show up." Laxus grunted while being fawned over.

"Why wouldn't I? Booze and swimsuits. This place basically screams my name." Bickslow looked around the pool area with a grin, watching a group of girls play volleyball at one end of the pool.

"So I take it you've sorted out your little issue?"

"It was never an issue to begin with, and I told you that."

"So you didn't talk to Blondie?" Laxus' voice had lowered considerably, but it was still loud enough for Bickslow to hear.

"Like I said the other day, there's nothing to talk about." Bickslow stood up and started walking over to the pool, "Now if you'll excuse me, I have somewhere else I need to be." With a grin, he started running towards the edge of the pool and jumped in, water splashing over Sting and Rogue, while almost sending Rufus flying out of the pool with the wave that followed.

* * *

Lucy and the rest of the team had arrived earlier that morning. Their job was a success, surprisingly. Erza may have gone a little overboard and given their target a concussion, but Wendy had managed to heal him enough so that he was somewhat conscious and able to be questioned by the council. Only a few small buildings had been demolished with the fighting, but it was mostly Erza's fault this time. Natsu had behaved for once, and only got involved in a small argument with Gray on the train. The entire team was in a good mood overall, and Lucy was ecstatic with the fact that she could pay her rent for the next three months.

The blonde had been standing by the edge of the pool talking with Yukino, when all of a sudden Natsu had come running up from behind her, picking her up in one swift motion while still running towards the pool and throwing her in before jumping in himself. Unfortunately, the pink haired Dragon Slayer had thrown the blonde a little too hard and instead of them both being in the pool, Lucy was now flying towards the opposite end of the pool while Natsu was still submerged in the water.

"NATSUUUUUUUU!" Lucy's scream rang out over the noise of everyone else, with many looking up to see the blonde flying over their heads. Yukino still remained in her position, now with her hands covering her mouth as she watched her friend flail around in the air.

Natsu shot up from the water, flipping his hair around and out of his face as he came up. He grinned and laughed while watching Lucy slowly come down.

Bickslow had been oblivious to the entire thing. He stood in the pool with his hands loosely resting on his waist below the water. It was only when he noticed that everyone in front of him was now staring wide-eyed at something behind him did he finally turn around, only to be immediately pushed down into the pool by something he hadn't had a chance to actually look at.

"Alright, my turn, Luce!" Natsu yelled from the other end of the pool where he had jumped in, only to be kicked out of the pool and sent flying towards the beach by a furious Erza. Everyone else had gone back to chatting and having a good time already, realising it was just another one of Natsu's crazy ideas.

Bickslow made his way back up to the surface, slicking his hair back as he came up before opening his eyes, "What the fu-" he was interrupted as Lucy popped up before him, his eyes wide as he stared down at the blonde, "Cosplayer?"

Lucy's face immediately went a dark shade of red as she realised who she had collided with, "Oh god, Bickslow. I'm sorry. Natsu decided it would be fun to see how far he could throw me or something, I don't know what was running through his head and it's kind of hard to move around in the air…" She looked around awkwardly, taking a step back in the water when she realised that they were standing only a few inches apart, her blush growing darker, if it were even possible at this point, "anyway… I'm uh… sorry, again."

Bickslow had seemingly forgotten how to talk. He watched the blonde that had just been standing mere inches away from him swim over to the nearest edge and climb out. His mouth hung slightly open as he stood still in the pool. _God damn it, Natsu,_ he thought. Lucy had once again taken over his every thought, and it was his entire fault.

After he realised he was still standing in the same spot in the pool, he waded over to the pool and climbed out. The Seith mage wrapped a towel around his shoulders as he sat down next to Laxus once again and stared at the pool in a daze.

Laxus had been watching the blue-and-black haired man through the wall of women that surrounded him. He had been able to see the celestial mage flying across the pool before she had so gracefully landed on Bickslow, and he had to refrain from bursting out laughing. Laxus had also seen his friend completely change after realising who it was who had landed on him, and he knew that the man had apparently not dealt with anything he was dealing with in his head.

"Time to get drunk?"

"Yep." Bickslow jumped up from the lounge chair at the mention of getting drunk. He was still in a daze over what had happened, but he knew that the alcohol would help a little bit. The two men headed back inside the guild.

* * *

Lucy was sitting on the edge of the pool with Levy after her trip across the pool, their feet dangling in the water.

"So Bickslow's actually pretty attractive when he's not wearing his visor or armor." Levy had whispered into the blonde's ear.

"What?!" Lucy shrieked. _Where the hell is this coming from?_

 _"_ Gi-hi-hi." Lucy turned to glare at Gajeel who was sitting on a rock just behind the girls with Lily next to him, knowing full well that the dragon slayer had just heard Levy too.

"What are you laughing at?"

"Nothin'." Gajeel turned his head away, still laughing to himself quietly.

"He's definitely not bad." Lucy turned once again to see Mira lowering herself to sit next to the two girls.

Lucy couldn't stop the ever-increasing blush on her cheeks and she looked between the two girls on either side of her, "Am I missing something?" The blonde had a feeling she was going to regret asking that when she watched the two women look at each other with mischievous grins before they turned back to face Lucy at the same time.

"So we might have heard something about the job you two just came back from…"

"Namely a few awkward moments…"

"One involving mud and rain…"

"And then some others where you two got all close and personal in a hotel room."

"That's not… how did you even hear about this?" Lucy's face was now a bright red as she looked between the two once again as they giggled.

"Evergreen has her ways." _So maybe that's why Mira's been giving me weird looks whenever I go up to the bar, or why Bickslow looked so uncomfortable when Evergreen seemed so shocked the other day…_

"I'm assuming there's more to this story though, right?" She couldn't help but start feeling uncomfortable herself as she asked the question. Sure, it was partly about her, but it was also involving Bickslow and she couldn't help but also start to feel a little curious about the rest of it.

"Well, I also heard from Laxus that he took home a random girl from a bar the night Evergreen got the information out of him, and that he didn't go out on the job with the Raijinshuu the other day. No one has seen him for the last three days." Levy looked at Mira in shock – apparently she hadn't heard that part of it either.

"I was under the impression that they could all disappear for days and weeks at a time, if not months?" Lucy found herself a little confused by what Mira had just told her.

"Yes, but he didn't go with the Raijinshuu. That's the first time they went without an entire team. _Ever_."

"Okay? I still don't quite get it, Mir-"

"Jesus, bunny-girl. The guy doesn't know if he has a thing for you or not."

Lucy turned to look behind her to see a bored-looking Gajeel, one elbow resting on his knee as he supported his head in his hand, "Wh-what?" The blush that she thought she had gotten rid of was creeping its way back on to her face as she turned back around. Levy was squealing with delight, and Mira was smiling while looking back at the blonde.

"It's true."

The Celestial Spirit mage didn't know what to say. She had just found out that the guy of her dreams (quite literally) could possibly like her but could also possibly not like her.

"Why do you think he's been actin' all weird for?" The Dragon Slayer behind her mumbled, apparently still taking some interest in the conversation.

Lucy thought back to the last few times she had seen the man over the course of the week. She had thought that he had seemed a little off at first, but she had just put that up to the weather in the town that he had seemed concerned about.

But that didn't explain the awkward glances, the incredibly awkward dream that she a little glad hadn't gone any further before she woke up, or the fact that she had felt maybe a little too comfortable while using the man as a human pillow, and he hadn't seemed to mind. Lucy remembered that almost every time she had seen Bickslow that week, he had seemed like he was deep in thought. She hadn't once seen his beloved 'babies' hovering around him as of late, and she couldn't remember the last time he had said anything perverted or creepy, because let's face it – that's what he was known for. He had been strangely quiet.

All Lucy could do was excuse herself from the two women, Dragon Slayer, and Exceed and find somewhere quiet to think. More importantly, she didn't want to continue on the topic of the Seith mage when he was already the thing that had clouded her mind since she had seen him in the pool. Three days away from the guild had almost been too perfect, especially since in those three days, she didn't think of Bickslow once.

But then she had to go and crash into him - _Thank you, Natsu_ \- and she was back to square one.

* * *

 **The next chapter is honestly my favourite so far. It's a little shorter, so I might upload that one later today or tomorrow. Who knows? Let me know in the reviews if you want me to upload more frequently!**

 **Also, I want to ask what other ships you want to appear (since they will appear eventually).**

 **Anyway, time to go re-write a few terrible parts that I really hate.**

 **Please review if you can! I really like waking up to review emails, and they make me very happy. :D**

 **\- April**


	6. Chapter 6

**If anyone has noticed the summary change in the last few days, just ignore that. I'm trying to write a better one but I'm seriously failing at it. If anyone wants to write one for me, go ahead. :D**

 **Kurahieiritr JIO - The only reason Gajeel was the one to figure it out was because he's been hanging around Laxus, and has been listening to the conversations between Laxus and Bickslow. ;)**

 **You guys already know Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail.**

* * *

The party had gone well into the night and early hours of the morning. By this point, most were either passed out somewhere or had gone home.

Natsu had made himself comfortable on one of the many lounge chairs surrounding the pool – his legs splayed out and arms hanging down on either side of him as he snored quietly; Sting was seemingly passed out with Rogue in the island in the centre of the pool; Elfman had been turned to stone again and seemed to be a hard pillow for Evergreen on another lounge chair; Gray and Lyon were just lying on the now frozen pool. Bodies were scattered around the area in amongst the broken glasses, mugs, and furniture. Inside the guildhall was just as bad as the outside. A lot of the lights had been dimmed at this point for all of the sleeping people.

Lucy had managed to enjoy the rest of the festivities with her friends. She needed the distraction, and it had definitely worked. The blonde made her way inside the guildhall, ready to head home for the night. She waved to a few people who were still awake and getting ready to head to their own homes.

Lucy looked around the hall once she had made it past the doors. Gajeel had made his bed on one of the tables with Levy resting her head on one end of it; Cana and Bacchus were swaying slightly on their benches giggling like morons as they continued drinking. Lucy couldn't even count how many barrels they had around them, but she figured it was all that the guild had. She made her way over to the bar where Mira was polishing a row of glasses in front of her as Max walked past with the broom.

"I didn't expect it to go on this long." Lucy folded her arms on the bar and rested her chin on them.

Mira giggled, "It's Fairy Tail after all."

Lucy sighed in response and looked down the bar. On one side there seemed to be a giant ball of Exceeds all sleeping peacefully, and down the other sat Laxus and Orga. They seemed to be drinking in complete silence.

The blonde pushed herself up from where she sat and walked around the other side of the bar and grabbed a cloth and started wiping down some glasses. Mira smiled at the blonde as if to say 'thank you.'

Once again, the guild was in silence. Orga had eventually managed to get up and start heading back to his own guild – only after he bumped into a few tables and tripped over a few people on the ground, and Laxus had headed upstairs. Lucy placed the last glass in the cupboard below the bar as Mira was wiping down the bar around the Exceeds.

The blonde walked back to the other side of the bar and began placing the stools upside down on the bar. It was only then that she had realised there was a seemingly passed out Bickslow on the floor where one of the stools should have been. Apparently, he had fallen to the ground while sitting on one and had never gotten back up. She couldn't help but frown at the sight. _What am I going to do about him?_

"You need to talk to him."

Lucy turned to see Laxus walking up behind her, his arms crossed over his chest as they both looked down at the Seith mage again, "Why do I need to talk to him?" _Damn it, I really do need to talk to him… but what would I even say?_

"Because he's not going to come and talk to you. He's stubborn, and as much as it pains me to say it, he's my friend and this whole thing with you is driving him insane – not that he would admit it out loud. On the off chance that you like him, or even if you don't like him, you need to let him know."

 _Driving him insane? What does that even mean? Do I even like him?_

"Look, just… just go home. He can stay here. He'll find his way out when he wakes up." Lucy watched the Dragon Slayer exit through the main doors, hearing them slam softly as they closed. She looked around the room, noticing that Mira and Max had also left. Cana and Bacchus were still off in their own world.

Sighing, she knelt down besides Bickslow. She could have done what Laxus had said, but something inside of her was telling her to try and wake the man up to get him home. She reached out and placed her hand in his hair, her thumb running back and forth slowly and softly, the shorter tufts of his hair at the front being pushed back with each stroke, "Bickslow?"

Bickslow wasn't entirely out of it as everyone had thought. He was still somewhat awake, but he was having pleasant 'dreams' of a certain blonde and he was just ignoring the rest of the world for the time being. He could vaguely feel someone touching his hair and that was something he did not like. _No one touches my hair._

In his state, he had forgotten he was on the floor of the guild rather than his own bed, "Laxus, stop touching my hair." The words came out as a slurred and mumbled mess, but Lucy could still understand it thanks to her friendship with Cana.

She giggled when he had thought she was Laxus, "Bickslow, get up."

"Go away." The man tried to roll over onto his side, but he was somewhat tangled up in the stool still, so instead he just continued lying on his back.

Lucy was back to frowning at the man before her. _Maybe I should just leave him here_ , she thought. _No, you can't let him sleep on the floor._ The blonde stood and moved down to where the stool was lying on its side, and carefully pulled it out from under his legs, noticing that one of the legs had snapped – probably from when he had tipped over. When the chair was moved away, she stood over him with one leg on each side of the man and reached down to grab both of his wrists in her hands.

"Leave me aloneeee." The man mumbled again, but Lucy just ignored it.

She started walking backwards slowly, making sure not to accidentally step on him. Unfortunately, the man was heavier than she had expected (it didn't help that he was unwilling to move), and after lifting his head and shoulders an inch or so off the ground, her hands slipped and he fell back down.

"What the hell was that for?!" Bickslow's hand shot up to the back of his head where it had collided with the ground, his eyes still closed and now scrunched up in pain.

"Well, maybe if you had gotten up it wouldn't have happened!" Lucy still stood over him with her arms crossed as she looked down at him with a frown.

 _Wait, that's not Laxus._ Bickslow opened his eyes slowly, waiting for them to adjust to the dim lighting in the room. He was not expecting to be looking up at the blonde who looked just about ready to 'Lucy Kick' him if he weren't already on the ground, "What are you doing?" He had managed to pull himself up a tiny bit and was leaning on his elbows.

"Trying to get you up so you don't sleep on the floor."

 _Why does she care if I sleep on the floor or not?_ "I'm quite happy with the floor. I was comfortable until you dropped me." Bickslow's words became slurred again as he closed his eyes.

"Be that way." _Is this what I get for being nice? Maybe they were wrong. Maybe he's not as conflicted as Laxus said?_ Lucy's heart sank a little bit at her own thoughts after she had realised that maybe _she_ liked the Seith mage. Sighing, she stepped over the man and began walking towards the door.

Despite Bickslow's mind being jumbled and messy from his drunkenness, his thoughts and feelings for the blonde were as clear as day. Laxus had helped him realise them through several hours of drinking, but the man still believed they were one-sided and he wasn't going to chase after someone who wouldn't reciprocate his feelings.

 _But she's right there._ He had turned his head to the side to watch her walk away. Before he could stop himself from opening his mouth, he had already spoken.

"Wait." Lucy turned to see Bickslow attempting to push himself up from the floor, but was failing – badly, "I won't sleep if Drunk 1 and Drunk 2 are giggling like idiots for the rest of the night." His head motioned towards Bacchus and Cana who were indeed giggling like idiots still.

Lucy walked back slowly to grasp Bickslow's outstretched hand in her own to help pull him to his feet. The man swayed a bit on his feet as he came to stand and almost fell forward. He would have pushed Lucy down with him if she hadn't put her hands flat on his chest to steady him, before she moved one arm around his waist with the other holding the wrist that was dangling over her shoulder.

* * *

Bickslow was leaning on the blonde as they walked through Magnolia. Lucy had asked him where had lived just after they had exited the guild and was somewhat relieved to know that it was only a few minutes away from her own home so she would still be able to get home and sleep before sunrise.

Most of the walk was in silence. Lucy couldn't think of anything to say, and Bickslow just didn't seem to have the energy to say much. If he did talk, Lucy could barely understand it by this point. The man seemed to get worse the longer he stayed awake.

Bickslow's head dropped down a few times and rested on the top of Lucy's head. She usually just lifted the hand that was holding his wrist and pushed his head away with a soft laugh.

"I like strawberries," Bickslow mumbled as Lucy had pushed his head away once again "You smell like strawberries."

"That's nice." Lucy mumbled in response. She was getting tired herself, and she figured if she didn't get him home soon, she would probably fall asleep while she was walking back to her own home.

"It is nice. You're nice." Bickslow chuckled before he spotted his building a few houses down, pointing in the general direction of it.

Lucy and Bickslow walked up the steps to the front door once they had reached his house, pleased to find that the door was unlocked.

"Which door is yours?" Lucy turned to look up at Bickslow who was now struggling to keep his eyes open.

"This one." Bickslow started leading them towards the one closest to the stairs on the second floor. As he got closer to the door, he held his free arm out to steady himself against the wall, "I think I drank too much."

"Like everyone else…" Lucy mumbled under her breath as she pushed the door to his apartment open. She looked around at the dark room. From what she could tell, it was at least twice the size as her own. Bickslow was once again leading them down the hall and walking into his bedroom, thankful that he didn't have to stop and open the door.

Before Lucy could get free, Bickslow had leant forward and fell down on the bed, his left arm still around Lucy's shoulder and hers loosely around his waist still. Lucy, who had also been trying to stay awake the entire time had lost all will to move and could feel herself sinking into the soft mattress of the bed. As she breathed in with her face against the soft sheets, she recognised that they smelled exactly like his cloak had. _Exactly like Bickslow does._ She made a mental note to figure out what it actually was _._

In a matter of seconds, the two appeared to be in a deep sleep just before dawn, with neither of them paying much attention to whom they were sleeping next to once again.

* * *

Bickslow was the first to wake up later that day, mindlessly walking towards his bathroom when he realised that he needed to throw up. _Yep, definitely drank too much._

He stumbled back into his room while looking down at his clothes, realising that he was still wearing the swim shorts that he wore the day before. Shrugging his shoulders, he was about to climb back onto his bed when he saw a familiar blonde sleeping on top of the sheets.

"What the hell?" Bickslow whispered to himself. _Why the hell is she here? How did I even get back here?_

The man climbed onto the bed and sat with his legs crossed and folded under each other as he stared at the sleeping blonde, trying to remember how he had managed to get home, and how the blonde had come to be on his bed.

 _I was at the bar with Laxus… and then I was drinking with Cana and Bacchus… but then I was back at the bar with Laxus._ Bickslow rubbed his temples, trying to ignore the pounding headache that had formed. He _needed_ to remember.

 _Wait, I fell off the chair at the bar and then I couldn't get up… so then I just drank on the floor until Mira cut me off…_

 _And then Cosplayer tried lifting me up but she dropped me on my head._ Bickslow could feel the slight bump on the back of his head as he remembered his night slowly. He could vaguely remember walking back to his house with her, but he couldn't remember the details. Bickslow could only assume he would have said something stupid to the girl at some point, and he could only hope that it wasn't _too_ stupid.

Something stupid like confessing that he actually did like the blonde – to the said blonde.

Bickslow ran his hands through his hair and down his face, spreading his fingers over his eyes to look at the Celestial Mage. _She still has clothes on. I still have clothes on. That's a good sign._ The Seith mage could only hope that Laxus wouldn't make an unannounced visit as he had an awful habit of that happened, then he'd be screwed.

Deciding that he was done sitting in the darkness, he moved off the bed as gently as he could to avoid waking the girl up. Sure, he needed to wake her up, but at the same time he really didn't want to. He was more scared of the possible 'Lucy Kick' from waking her up than anything. Bickslow was always going to be scared of getting her famous 'Lucy Kick'.

He pulled his dark curtains back a fraction, the light spilling into the room. It was mid afternoon so it wasn't as terrible as the morning sun that seemed to shine directly into his eyes no matter what direction he was facing. Pleased with the fact that the girl had yet to wake, he shuffled out into his dark hallway and to the kitchen, only to return with a glass of water in his hand as he leant on his doorframe, taking small sips from the glass.

 _I need to wake her up._

Bickslow made his way over to the bed again, sitting with his legs crossed once again. He reached out gingerly and placed a hand on Lucy's shoulder, shaking her softly, "Hey, Cosplayer."

Lucy's eyes fluttered open slowly as she heard the familiar voice and the feeling of someone shaking her. She stretched her arms out before using them to push herself up in a sitting position. She realised that she wasn't in her own house, and then she had remembered that she had spent the night at Bickslow's house after she had taken him home in his drunken state. Luckily for the blonde, she wasn't much of a heavy drinker and hadn't got anywhere near as drunk as everyone else so her memories were a lot easier to remember, and her headache was bearable.

She could sense someone behind her, so she turned her head over her shoulder to see Bickslow sitting on the bed, staring down at his hands. Lucy turned around on the bed and sat before him, her legs folded under herself as she sat on her knees.

"Well, I didn't think I'd do that again…" The blonde tried her best to break the awkward silence.

Bickslow let out a short and quiet laugh, "Yeah, well, I guess that's my fault. Thanks for managing to get me back in one piece."

It was Lucy's turn to feel uncomfortable and awkward. She knew now would be the perfect time to talk to him since they were alone, but she didn't know where to start. She looked at Bickslow who was still looking down. She noticed his hair – the hair that usually looked so good in its own weird way – was sticking out at all odd angles, and he hadn't seemed to notice. Lucy couldn't stop herself from laughing quietly.

Bickslow looked up at her, "I'm glad you find this entertaining." Lucy's laugh grew louder, and he couldn't stop the small smile that had formed on his lips.

"No, it's just… your hair. You have some serious bed head."

"Oh…" Bickslow's hands went up to try and sort it out, but without a mirror he couldn't quite tell what he was doing, and he was only making it worse.

"Here, let me." Lucy leant forward to reach her hands forward to begin fixing his hair. He could feel her working through the tangles with her fingers that had formed in the longer sections. He looked up slightly, only to be greeted by the blonde's well-endowed chest now at his eye-level. The white dress that she had on over her bikini was extremely low cut, as usual. His eyes widened as he instantly looked elsewhere, deciding that the tangled sheets were a better sight.

 _Nope, don't look there. Not with her. Anyone but her._

Bickslow felt the bed move slightly as she moved back to her seated position and looked back to her. She was biting her bottom lip, and he couldn't help but think of how cute she looked, "Uh… thanks."

"I figured you liked your hair looking good, especially after you had thought I was Laxus and told me to 'stop touching your hair.'" A small giggle escaped her lips.

"I tend to stay stupid things when I'm drunk, and I don't like people touching my hair." _Well, it was stupid, but not nearly as stupid as what you_ could _have said._

Lucy put her hands on either side of her knees and stood up before stepping down from the bed and heading towards the open door. She realised that Bickslow had stood up too, but was closer to the bed than the door. He looked like he didn't know what to do.

"Well, I probably look terrible too, so I'm going to head home..." She smiled softly before turning to start walking down the hall.

"No." Lucy turned back around, realising that Bickslow was now standing closer to her. She noticed the light blush on his cheeks.

"'No' what?"

"You don't look terrible." Bickslow took a step closer to Lucy, whose blush rivalled Erza's hair.

Lucy could feel her heart beating at a million miles an hour, and she knew she was blushing a deep red as she looked up at the man before her, "I probably d-"

"You look perfect." Everything Bickslow had ever thought up to this moment had been thrown out the window. He knew only one thing, and that was that he did like the blonde, and there was something he needed to do before he let her leave. He didn't even have the time to hate himself for speaking. He heard her gasp when he had said the words, and he didn't know what her reaction would be, but he closed the gap between them in one step and lowered his lips to hers gently.

* * *

 **Alright, this one was a little shorter because well... obvious reasons.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you so much for the reviews on the last chapter everyone! I enjoyed reading them hehehe.**  
 **CelticHeart13 - that was the reaction I was going for, so it looks like I did my job well. ;)**  
 **Kurahieiritr JIO - I apologise, it goes back to words for a little bit in this chapter. :( There's still plenty more actions over words in later chapters though. :D**

 **Before you start, I'd like to apologise for this chapter. Certain parts have been completely re-written over and over again. It's not perfect, and I don't particularly like all of it, but I feel it's just one of those chapters that needed to be here and I can't really explain what I'm trying to say.**

Sigh.

 **Well, I hope it's readable at least.**

 **And for the last time, Hiro Mashima owns Fairy Tail.  
I'm never going to say it again. **

* * *

Lucy froze as she felt Bickslow's lips touch her own. She closed her eyes as she felt his fingers rest gently against her chin, tilting her head up more.

It felt like time had slowed down. She could hear her heart beating in her ears and she could feel the warmth radiating from his skin as she realised how close their bodies were.

She could feel Bickslow's unmoving lips against hers still and she realised she didn't want those few short seconds to come to and end, since something about it had felt so right to her, and it had made her recognise her own feelings for the Seith mage.

Lucy Heartfilia definitely had feelings for the guild's resident pervert - no ifs, buts, maybes, or mights. She was still trying to deal with the fact that she had only realised the possibility of liking him less than twelve hours earlier which she still found slightly confusing.

But those few short seconds eventually came to an end when Bickslow dropped his hand back to his side and pulled his head back slightly while looking down at the blonde whose face was barely a few inches away from his own.

Lucy lifted her gaze and found herself looking Bickslow directly in the eyes. She noticed the concentric circles that were slightly darker than the garnet red of the irises before she followed the shape of his eyes, observing the way each end seemed to end in a defined curl. She'd never been close enough to notice any of it, but now she could. She noticed how the red of his eyes seemed to complement the blue of his hair and the mark across his face, and how on anyone else those features would seem weird or odd. But on Bickslow, they all seemed to work.

 _Maybe it's just because they're_ his _?_

"Uh… sorry." He took a step back, increasing the distance between them.

"W-why are you apologising?" She asked as her cheeks became dusted with a light pink.

 _Why_ was _I apologising?_ He asked himself as he furrowed his brow, "I don't know… I guess it just came out of nowhere. I just needed to do that, at least once…" He turned his head slightly to avoid looking directly at her.

"Oh…" Lucy looked down at her feet for a second, "Don't apologise, though." She raised herself to stand on her tiptoes before she lifted her hand to move it to the back of his head. She pulled him down slightly, ignoring the questioning look he was giving her from the corner of his eyes, and brushed her lips against his cheek lightly before returning her hand to her side to turn and walk down the hall. Lucy didn't know she had just done that, but the little voice inside her had said it was the right thing, and it had felt right so she wouldn't question it for now.

Bickslow didn't realise he had closed his eyes until he heard the sound of the door to his apartment being closed. He stood motionless for who knows how long, playing back the short conversation in his head over and over. He had mostly kissed her on a whim, but he knew he had wanted to; needed to, even.

But now he felt more confused than ever. He knew that he did in fact like Lucy and if anything he found himself liking her more, which he realised was going to be a problem for him. That aside, he also knew that kissing her then had simultaneously been the best and worst decision of the day. Bickslow knew that he was going to have trouble forgetting about it; telling himself that it meant nothing, that it was nothing at all.

He wanted those words to be true just because it would make his life so much easier, but he understood that that was just not going to be the way it went. In that moment, Bickslow had wanted to wrap his arms around the blonde and never let go. He could have stayed like that forever: his lips against hers. Time had stopped for him at that very moment, and oh, did he want time to stop again. He knew that much.

But that's not what made him so confused now. It was what she had said that had made him so confused.

 _"Don't apologise."_

 _What does that mean? Does that just mean she had no intentions of kicking me through a wall? Or that she had possibly liked it?_

Bickslow truly didn't know what the answer was, but he knew that he was mostly glad he had done it, despite the fact it seemed to be causing him more problems than expected.

* * *

Lucy smiled as she walked home. Being a Saturday afternoon, the streets were a little busy so her walk took a little longer than she had planned but she was too happy to care.

She eventually made it home and headed straight for her bathroom and to the mirror. She frowned when she looked in the mirror and found that she really did look terrible – her hair was mostly tangled as it hung down and her mascara had smudged under her eyes.

" _You look perfect."_

The words echoed in her mind as she stepped into the hot water of the bath and sat down slowly, sighing contentedly from the warmth.

Lucy's mind played back the previous events over and over, focusing on how _right_ it had felt when he had kissed her.

Unfortunately, she had also focused on something else he had said:

" _I just needed to do that, at least once."_

Lucy wondered what it meant. Did that mean he wanted it to happen again? Or was it just something he needed to happen once so he could move on? Her smile had turned to a frown as she began to think of it more, Sighing once again, she stepped out of the water that was now cool and wrapped herself up in a fluffy white towel before heading back into the main room of her apartment.

The blonde threw her hair up into a messy bun while it was still damp, then pulled on a pair of light blue denim shorts with a simple black tank top.

She sat down on her bed before deciding if she should head to the guild or not. There wouldn't be many people there since most would still be sleeping or staying in dark rooms to deal with their hangovers. Lucy figured Mira would be back cleaning up, and Levy would probably be reading at the guild so she decided she would go help out for the rest of the night.

* * *

Lucy walked through the doors to the guild and smiled when she saw Mira wiping down more mugs and glasses at the bar. She made her way over to that side of the room, walking past Gajeel who was flipping tables over on his own while Jet and Droy struggled to flip one together. She saw Wakaba and Macao sitting at their usual table while Max was sweeping around them again, and Nab was moving benches around so each table had benches on each side.

The blonde was about to take a seat at the bar to ask Mira what she could do to help when she heard the master's voice coming from just behind her.

"Ah, Lucy. Glad you're here."

Lucy turned to face him, "Just coming to see what I can do to help clean up." She said with a smile.

"I actually have something else for you to – Oh, Bickslow! Come over here." Lucy turned towards the door to see Bickslow frozen in place. She hadn't expected him to be at the guild that day, and apparently he had thought the same for the Celestial Spirit mage.

Bickslow made his way over to where Lucy and Makarov were with one eyebrow raised in question. He didn't have his helmet since he had left his usual attire in a locker at the back of the guild for the party.

He leant on a table opposite them with his arms crossed over his chest. Bickslow shot a quick glance towards the blonde who blushed lightly and he couldn't stop the corner of his mouth lifting up slightly.

Makarov cleared his throat, "Now, we've just received an urgent request from a town that seems to have been plagued with violent storms over the last week," he looked over the request form in his hands, "Cartervale. I believe you two had a job there last week? Did you notice anything strange about the weather?" The man looked between Lucy and Bickslow.

Bickslow frowned slightly, "I thought it was strange on the first day, but I couldn't tell why. It seemed to be better on the day we left though so I thought it was just a particularly bad storm."

Lucy looked at Bickslow. She could tell that he seemed worried again, because she had seen that face when she had asked about it before. She turned to face the master, "So do we head out tomorrow?"

"Well, no…" Makarov frowned, "Due to the distance and the time taken to get there, it would be best if we had someone there first thing in the morning rather than get there in the middle of the day. There's a train leaving in about an hour."

Lucy was the one frowning now, "I'm sure there's guilds that are closer to the town. Wouldn't it be easier for them to respond instead?"

"That would seem the logical thing to do, but no. Apparently there were more members of other guilds here yesterday than we noticed." The master chuckled to himself.

"Fine, but – wouldn't it be better getting an actual team rather than just the two of us? If it's an urgent request, something tells me that this is going to be a bit out of our league." Bickslow finally looked up from the ground as he looked at the master.

"Well, the only reason I'm sending you two off is because you're the only ones here that would do this kind of job. Both of your teams will be sent out tomorrow morning so they can join you later in the day. Like I said before, it would be best to have someone there first thing in the morning and the two of you have been there before, and you yourself said it was strange from when you were there." Makarov started heading towards the stairs to go back to his office before he turned to face the two again, "Now hurry up and get out of here to get home and pack before you miss the train!"

The few people scattered around the room had turned to look at the commotion since he had raised his voice, but went back to doing what they were doing almost immediately.

Bickslow sighed and pushed himself up from the table he was leaning on. He had only come in to get his clothes, and now he was being sent out on a job with Cosplayer. He headed towards the public baths that the guild now had and into the adjoining room with the lockers, finding the one where he had stored everything before walking out to the main room again.

"Come on, Cosplayer." Bickslow had said as the walked past Lucy who was standing at the bar talking to Mira.

"Fine, coming." The blonde has said as she started heading towards the door just behind Bickslow, "Bye Mira, bye Levy!" She waved as she exited the guild. The faint giggle of Mira could be heard as they walked out.

* * *

The two were walking in the same direction since their houses were relatively close, and they now walked side-by-side. Bickslow had put his helmet back on before exiting the guild and had the rest of his clothes tucked under his arm.

"So…" Lucy broke the silence as Bickslow looked down at her.

"We don't have to talk about it, if that's what you were going to talk about." Bickslow's eyes returned to the front as they kept walking. _She's right there, and I'm pushing her away before anything can happen… why? What am I even doing?_

Lucy's gaze dropped too after hearing the words, _does that mean he doesn't want to talk about it? Because it was and meant nothing?_ "Oh… okay then." Bickslow frowned slightly as he could hear the slight disappointment in her voice, "I was actually going to say that it's the first time I've ever seen you wear somewhat normal clothes. They look good on you." A light blushed formed on her cheeks as he turned back to face her.

Bickslow let out a short laugh, "Yeah, well. I had no choice since I left all of my stuff at the guild." He looked down at his choice of clothes for the day: dark blue jeans and a plain black shirt, "but thanks though."

"What for?"

"For saying I look good." He laughed again as he watched her blush more and couldn't stop the grin that was forming on his face.

The two walked in the silence for a little while more before they stopped where they had to head in opposite directions to go back to their own homes.

"I guess I'll meet you at the station in a bit then?" Lucy nodded as she started walking backwards while Bickslow had turned to the side, "and don't forget to bring warmer clothes this time," he had said with a smirk.

Lucy smiled, "and what if I want to wear your cloak instead?" Her smile immediately faltered and she blushed once again as Bickslow laughed, his wide grin on his face, "I-ignore that. I'll see you soon." Lucy mentally hit herself in the head as she turned around and walked towards her house. _Why would you say something like that?_

Bickslow turned and headed towards his own house with a grin. He had remembered that he had liked seeing her wrap herself up in it, and he had kind of liked how it had smelled like strawberries for the next few days – not that he would admit that to anyone.

As he walked towards his house, he realised that she seemed to be more comfortable around him now, and he didn't mind it. _Don't tell me she… no, it can't be. There is no possible way that_ she _likes_ me _._ _This is too confusing._

* * *

The train they were on was the last train for the day and it was relatively empty. They had gotten seats opposite each other, and Bickslow had made himself comfortable by propping his head up in his hand with his elbow on the table that sat between. He had been looking out the window until the train had left the station and realised that he wouldn't be able to look at the horizon for long since it was already sunset and soon everything would be dark.

Sighing, he leant back in his chair and looked at the girl opposite him, noticing that she had changed her clothes and was wearing something more suitable for colder weather this time.

Lucy looked up from the book she had been reading when she could feel Bickslow's eyes on her, "Is there anything I can help you with?" She asked with one eyebrow raised.

"Let's play a game." Bickslow leant forward and rested his chin in his hands as his elbows rested on the table.

"A game?" She closed the book and placed it on the table. "The last game I got involved in with you, you were trying to help Laxus take over Fairy Tail."

The Seith mage visibly flinched at the memory. Occasionally he would forget how much pain that had caused, and it brought all the horrible feelings and memories back up every time he remembered, "Right. Sorry, never mind then." He turned his head to look out at the sky that was mostly dark at this point. He could still make out the shapes of trees as they flew past.

Lucy frowned at his sudden change, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to…" She mumbled, "What's this game?"

He looked back at her before leaning back again and folding his arms across his chest, "Alright. It's not so much a game. Basically, we each get twenty questions and we can ask anything. Whoever doesn't answer a question first loses," he watched the blonde nod as she listened to him explain the game, "You can go first."

"Hmm, okay," Lucy thought for a moment. She had twenty questions and she could basically ask anything she wanted. Deciding that she probably wasn't going to use all twenty, she figured she could start with something easy, "Why do you want to play this game?"

"Because I figure I can get to know you since I know nothing about you, and it seems like a fun way to pass the time."

"Seems reasonable. I guess it's your turn now." She smiled softly at the Seith mage opposite her.

Bickslow –unlike Lucy— wasn't going to start with something simple. "Why aren't you and Loke or you and Natsu together yet?" He grinned as he watched her blush and look down, "Aw, don't tell me I've won already."

"No, you haven't," she looked back up to find him grinning still, "and I love them both, but not like that. Natsu is like my brother, and so is Loke even though he's one of my spirits. I could never see them as anything else." Truth was, she had once seen Natsu as something other than her brother, but that was long gone.

Bickslow laughed softly, "I don't think any of that has ever stopped him from expressing his love for you."

"I know," the blonde sighed, realising it was once again her turn, "Alright, how about… how old are you?"

"Is that what I should be assuming I wasn't frozen on an island for seven years, or what I technically am?"

"Technically. I sometimes forget about that whole thing, but then I look at Wakaba and Macao." She stifled a giggle as Bickslow smirked.

"Then that would make me 22 still. And what about you?"

"Technically?" She smirked.

"Yes, technically." Bickslow rolled his eyes, not that she could see since he still had his helmet on.

"Then I would be 18."

"Ah, so young." Bickslow joked. He knew most of the members of the guild were around that age, so that wasn't surprising to him, he just couldn't think of a question to follow up with.

"Unlike you," Lucy has said as she giggled with her hand covering her mouth, "Alright, what's your last name? Do you even have a last name?"

Bickslow folded his arms across his chest again, "Excuse me, I am not that old. Laxus is older than me, and my last name is Alderwood. What kind of person doesn't have a last name?"

The questions were mostly harmless, but there were a few that made Lucy blush, and there were one or two that made Bickslow glad he was wearing his helmet so that he could hide his own slight blush. The two were nearing the end of their allowed questions when Lucy decided she would ask something that she had been wondering all day:

"Why did you kiss me?"

Bickslow remained silent as he looked out the window. _Shit, I wasn't expecting that._

"No answer? Do I win yet?"

"Not that easy, Cosplayer." He had turned to the face the blonde once again.

"So? What's your answer?" She leant forward, leaning her chin on her arms that were folded on the table.

"Because I wanted to." Bickslow leant forward and leant on his own folded arms, mimicking her own posture as their faces sat only a few inches apart on the table.

"That's not really an answer."

"I think it is."

"I don't think so, but fine. Your turn."

Bickslow thought for a moment as he looked at her, thinking of his next question.

"Hm. Why didn't you stop me?" He asked with a smirk. He realised she had had plenty of opportunities to slap him or kick him through a wall or to the ground, but she hadn't. She hadn't done anything like that.

Lucy went to open her mouth to talk, but realised she didn't know what to say so instead closed it immediately as she blushed.

"Do I win then?"

"No. And because I didn't want to." Lucy mumbled as she turned her head slightly. She knew it was a terrible answer, but she didn't really want to confess that she had liked it.

"That's a terrible answer."

"Your answers aren't much better."

"Yeah, but I make the rules." He grinned as he continued looking at her across the table.

"That's not entirely fair then." Lucy sat up a bit and reached her hands forward. Bickslow could feel her pulling gently on the side of the helmet as she pulled it off and he closed his eyes, running a hand through his hair that was mostly flattened from the helmet, hearing the sound of it being placed on the table beside him.

"Why did you do th-?" He was interrupted as he felt hands on the side of his face, gently tilting his head up before he felt something soft on his lips. He opened his eyes slowly and realised they were Lucy's lips when he saw her eyes closed right in front of him, and he closed his own eyes again and enjoyed the feel of her soft lips against his own.

Lucy pulled away after a few beats and sat back down, leaning forward on her arms again as Bickslow did the same. _Why the hell did I do that?_

"So was that your actual answer?" Bickslow grinned. _If that was her answer, then I definitely liked that one_ , he had thought to himself.

"Maybe," She giggled quietly, "Alright. This is my last question."

"Bring it."

Lucy mentally prepared herself for what she about to say. Either way, she probably wasn't ready to either answer, but she couldn't think of anything else so she just went with it. She figured she was too far gone to care at this point.

"Is there…" She cleared her throat, deciding it was better to just get it all out and readied herself for the rest of the question, "I mean… do you… like me?" She said quietly. The question sounded so childish, but she didn't know how else to put it.

Bickslow sat up, turning his head to look out the window once again. _It's now or never, Bickslow._ Sighing, he ran his hand through his hair before bring his hand back to his side, "I guess so." He said quietly, still looking out the window. _I_ _guess so? What kind of answer is that, you idiot._

Lucy smiled as she looked down at the table. Bickslow could see her smile in the reflection of the window and he couldn't stop the corners of the mouth to lift up slightly. She figured he wasn't going to talk much for the rest of the trip and they were over halfway there, so she picked up her book and flipped to where she had her bookmark and began reading again.

* * *

The train arrived at the station just after 10:30pm and the two slowly made their way down the carriage to get off the train. The remainder of the journey had been in silence, and he was glad. It wasn't so much an awkward silence as it had been in previous times, but it was comfortable. Sure, he basically confessed that he liked her and that made him uncomfortable as all hell, but somewhere deep down inside of him, he knew that she felt the same way (at least a little bit, he figured), and that made him feel happy.

Fortunately, the two were not staying at the same inn they had the previous time they had come to the town. Instead, they were staying at one closer to the centre of the town and from what they could tell from the exterior, this one seemed a lot nicer than the other one.

The two walked in and were greeted by the cheerful receptionist, "Good evening. Were you requiring a room tonight?" The woman smiled at the two before her.

"Yes please, for two nights." Lucy smiled back at the woman.

"No problem, and was it just the one room or separate rooms?"

"Separate rooms." The Celestial Spirit mage and the Seith mage had said at the same time, receiving a questioning glance from the woman behind the desk to which Lucy just smiled sweetly again.

"Alright then…" The woman pulled two keys from a drawer and handed them to Lucy who had handed one to Bickslow, "Both rooms are down the hall to the right on the third floor, and they're both on the left-hand side of the corridor."

"Thank you!" Lucy had said cheerily as she headed towards the staircase that was to the side of the front desk with Bickslow following behind her. The two walked down the hall as they looked for their rooms that they had been assigned.

Bickslow had stopped when he found his door, and Lucy stopped just after him as she found her door, and they both entered their rooms at the same time. The rooms were surprisingly nice. Each had a double bed in the middle of the room with dark end tables on each side that matched the wood of the small dresser that sat at the foot of the bed. There was a grey armchair in the corner with a lamp and a small coffee table, and each room had wide glass doors that led to small private balconies that overlooked the pool and gardens at the back of the building.

Lucy placed her small suitcase on the bed before opening it and looking for something to sleep in. She sighed when she realised she had forgotten the pants to her pyjamas, so instead she just threw on a striped pink and yellow singlet that sat just above her hips.

The blonde went through her nightly ritual of brushing her hair and teeth and applying her favourite lotion to her arms and legs before she pulled the dark grey covers of the bed back and climbed in, looking around the room as she tried to think of something that would occupy her time since she had slept into the afternoon and was not feeling tired. She had gotten up to retrieve the book from her bag and was about to pull it out when she heard a knock on the door.

The door opened and Bickslow raised an eyebrow as he noticed her attire, "Uh… most people usually wait to answer the door if they're getting dressed. Not that I'm complaining or anything…" His grin widened as he saw her blush.

Apparently Lucy had forgotten her choice of clothes since she would occasionally sleep like that whenever her favourite pants needed to be washed, "Oh… uh… turn around or something!" She couldn't find anything to cover her lower half with, despite her underwear covering more than her bikini usually did, so instead she just climbed back onto the bed and sat cross-legged with the covers pulled over her legs.

Bickslow chuckled as he walked into the room and closed the door behind him. He looked around for somewhere to sit, but when he noticed the chair had her suitcase on it he opted to just stand, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest.

"So? Why are you here?" Lucy had asked once she had made herself comfortable again, "And can you please sit down somewhere or not stand like that, it makes me nervous.

"Sorry, I tend to channel my inner-Laxus sometimes." He smirked as he made his way over to the end of the bed, sitting on the corner of it. "Anyway, I'm not tired and I realised I still have one more question to ask since you went first."

Lucy leant back against the pillows, "So what's the question?"

"I don't know, I haven't thought of it yet."

"Then come back when you've thought of one." Lucy laughed as she picked up one of the pillows next to her and threw it at his face. She laughed more as it bounced off the side of his head.

"That wasn't very nice." Bickslow grinned as he picked up the pillow that had just been thrown at him and got up from the bed. He walked over to the other side and rested it against the headboard where it had originally been before he sat down and leant against the pillow.

"I thought I told you to come back when you had a question." Lucy eyed him as he sat down and made himself comfortable.

"You did, but I also wanted to do this." The Seith mage smirked before he placed his fingers around the blonde's chin, turning her head gently so it faced him and leant down, resting his lips against hers for a few short moments before pulling back and dropping his hand.

"And what makes you think that you could get away with that?" Lucy said with an amused tone as she blushed lightly again.

"I don't exactly know, but… you know now that I like you, and honestly, I like kissing you…" he mumbled before he looked to the blonde to see the slight blush forming on her cheeks and his grin widened, "and if you didn't like it, then you would have kicked my ass, and you have yet to do so which would mean that you did like it, and by extension, like me to some extent."

 _Woah, calm down there. Do you hear the words coming out of your mouth? Are you the same person right now?_ Bickslow pushed his somewhat annoying inner-voice to the back of his mind. In the space of twenty-four hours he had realised that he did have feelings for the blonde; woken up next to said blonde yet again; kissed the blonde; got to know the blonde a little bit; been kissed by the blonde; admitted to the blonde that he did like her; and kissed the blonde again. By this point, he had given up on trying to deny his feelings for her since they were out in the open now, and he realised that she at least reciprocated _some_ of those feelings.

"Someone's confident." Lucy laughed. She hadn't seen him be this relaxed around her all week, and she noticed that she too was feeling relaxed, and that made her smile.

"Very." He laughed when he felt a pillow hit the side of his head again, turning to see Lucy sliding down the bed from her sitting position and was now lying on her side with her head and shoulders propped up on several pillows.

The room sat in a comfortable silence for a while. Bickslow had been looking out through the open curtains in the room, thinking about the job that had been so important it required the Raijinshuu, Laxus, and Team Natsu, as well as thinking of what his last question would be.

Lucy had ended up getting up to retrieve her book before returning to the bed and was sitting up reading silently.

"I figured out what my question would be."

Lucy didn't look up from her book, but instead she closed it and placed it on the bedside table for sliding down the bed and turning the lamp off and getting ready to sleep, "and what is that question?" she said as she stifled a yawn.

"Will you get dinner with me?"

Lucy smiled into the pillow, "are you asking me out on a date?"

"Maybe?" He shrugged his shoulders slightly, "That was the general plan, but I usually skip the whole 'date' thing…" Bickslow's voice trailed off into silence.

"Oh… well, when were you thinking?"

"I haven't thought of that yet."

"You're really not very good at this." Lucy giggled quietly. _It's kind of adorable how bad he is with this_ , she thought.

"That is very true."

Bickslow could hear Lucy moving around next to him so he looked to his side, seeing that she was now lying on her side and facing away from him, apparently ready to go to sleep. He leant over to his other side and switched off the lamp that was on the table next to him and got up from the bed in the darkness.

"You never actually gave me an answer to going on a date with me." He said as she made his way over to the door, the moonlight from the open curtains illuminating the room enough for him to navigate the room.

Lucy sighed into her pillow, "Yes, I'll go on a date with you."

Bickslow couldn't stop the grin from forming on his lips. Deciding it was time to try and sleep himself, he placed his hand on the door handle, turning it and pulling the door open slightly, "Night, Cosplayer." He said as he walked out the door and pulled it closed silently.

 _A date is good, right?_

 _Crap. I've never been on a date._

 _What the hell do you do on a date?_

Sighing, he ran a hand through his hair as he walked back into his own room. He stared up at the dark ceiling once he was in his own bed. _I should have thought of this before I asked her out,_ he thought as he closed his eyes and rolled to his side. He would have time to think about that after the mission. Right now, he needed to sleep.

* * *

 **Ughhh. I re-wrote this chapter about a million times, and I don't know how else to do it. I know the whole train thing is terrible (especially the whole 'do you like me?' part), but the only reason it's still there is because I see both Lucy and Bickslow incredibly inexperienced and awkward when it comes to stuff like that. Please forgive me for the bad writing!**

 **Also, regarding their ages.**  
 **If we consider X791 as X785, then Lucy would be around 17/18, and Bickslow 22/23. According to the series timeline on the wiki, there's only 4 years between them (according to that, Bickslow was born in 763 and Lucy in 767 if my memory serves me correct), so if Lucy is 18 and Bickslow is 22, there's 4 years difference.**

 **For their birthdays, I'm having it around May-June-July. Since for those months, they were in the Celestial Spirit world, she would have missed her birthday by the time the GMG occurred, but I'm still treating it like she would have celebrated it. Not much is known about Bickslow, so to keep him at 22, let's just say his birthday is around January-February-March, since the Tenrou Team returned in April, so basically Bickslow was not able to celebrate his birthday, keeping him at 22 since he was still technically 'frozen' then.**

 **I hope that makes sense? If anyone wants to correct me on this 'theory' then by all means, go ahead! It honestly confused the hell out of me when I was considering it.**

 **Anyway, I hope you liked it!**

 **\- April**


	8. Chapter 8

**Firstly, I'd like to say thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. I'm always highly critical of everything I do that others will see, so it's reassuring to know I'm not doing terribly haha.**

 **Secondly, I'm going to apologise for this chapter too. I've never written a fight/action scene or anything of the sort (hell, I've never written anything like this IN GENERAL before), so it's weird, I'll do my best to improve for future chapters if need be.**

* * *

The two sat on a bench inside the station as they waited for the train with their teams to arrive. Bickslow sat with his head resting on his hand as he leant forward, seemingly bored with waiting. Lucy had been reading her book again, with one leg crossed over the other. She hadn't needed to wear Bickslow's cloak (as much as she wanted to), since she had dressed for the day in black jeans with her usual boots over the top, and she had her light pink coat on over her white and blue sleeveless shirt.

Being there in the morning had proved to be useless. The weather was much worse than it had been when they were there at the start of the week, and the strong wind and rain had made it impossible to do anything outside. The two had decided it would be best to wait for everyone else to arrive before they headed towards the mayor's house for the details for the job, since Makarov didn't have many to give them.

The train arrived at the station just after noon. Erza and Laxus were the first to exit, with Freed and Evergreen just behind them before Gray, Wendy, and Happy followed. They had all gathered around where Bickslow and Lucy now stood, all watching the door to the carriage they had all come from.

"I vote we just leave." Laxus had mumbled.

"Natsu will be out soon." Erza smiled, and sure enough Natsu sluggishly crawled out from the carriage and along the platform towards the group.

"Why did it have to be so far away?" Natsu mumbled as he collapsed onto the ground, still recovering from the motion sickness. Laxus just smirked to himself, pleased that his motion sickness wasn't as bad as the Dragon Slayer that lay before him.

* * *

The group made their way out of the station and stood just outside the main doors, all taking in the weather. Erza and Laxus had led the two teams, with everyone else falling behind them with Wendy and Lucy supporting Natsu as he recovered from the nausea. There was a break in the rain, leaving just the strong wind and the chill of the air.

Thankfully, the town hall wasn't very far from the station so they were able to get inside before it started raining again. The two teams had been escorted to a large room on the second floor with two black leather lounges in the middle of it, with a large oak desk sitting just behind the lounges.

The group had made themselves comfortable in the room as they waited for the Mayor to appear. Erza stood by the end of one of the lounges with her arms folded while Laxus stood by the other lounge, with everyone else sitting down.

"Ah, you must be the mages from Fairy Tail. I apologise for keeping you waiting." Everyone turned towards the door at the back of the room where the voice had come from. A small man about Levy's size, dressed in a bright orange suit, was walking towards the large desk.

Erza nodded, "I'm sorry, but we don't quite know the details. We only know that you required urgent assistance and you were having issues with violent weather, but this was the earliest that everyone could be here."

The mayor stood up from the chair and walked over to a window, motioning for the group to follow him, "Ah, indeed. We have been the centre of a storm for the last week. Many townsfolk that reported hearing loud noises from the forest to the north, and when the clouds seem to clear there is something that resembles the eye of a cyclone," Everyone looked out the window, sure enough seeing the storm clouds in the distance that vaguely resembled what he had described, "but without a wizard's guild or forces large enough to deal with anything, we've had to call for assistance from outside towns. Fairy Tail were the only ones to respond, so I apologise for the distance you all had to travel."

"Distance is nothing, as long as we can help, that's all that matters." Freed had decided to speak, the rest of the Raijinshuu nodding in agreement.

"Alright, let's go!" Natsu had yelled as he started running towards the door to leave the room.

Happy flew just behind him, chiming in with his usual "Aye, Sir!"

* * *

The group made their way through the town towards the northern forest. Carla and Happy had flown Wendy and Natsu ahead to see if they could spot anything, but they had yet to come back. Laxus and Erza were once again leading the group with everyone else falling behind them in silence.

The northern forest didn't have a trail, so when they arrived it was a matter of Erza leading them all in a single-file line while cutting away the thicker parts of the brush that seemed to cover almost the entire forest floor. Natsu and Wendy had returned before they all left the town and ventured into the forest, claiming that the rain was too heavy and it was hard to see anything through it.

They all made their way through the forest slowly. The sound of the branches and leaves snapping and crunching under their feet couldn't be heard over the heavy rain and thunder that seemed to get louder as they went deeper into the forest. The forest itself was dense, so they weren't getting as wet as they would have been were they out in the open, but the tall trees with the thick canopies seemed to block most of it so they would only get dripped on as if they were inside an old building with a leaky roof.

No one knew what to expect they'd find in that forest. Natsu had taken off after he had picked up on a scent, with Laxus following not far behind him but had stayed closer to the group. It was only when Laxus had run into Natsu who was standing still on the edge of a large clearing, with the rest of the two teams slowing down when they could see the two standing still.

"What the hell is that?" Laxus had murmured, staring up at what Natsu and everyone else was now staring at.

In the middle of the clearing sat what could only be described as the largest bird that any of them had seen, and none of them were sure if it could still be classified as a bird rather than a bird-like monster. The creature sat with its dark grey wings wrapped around its body, as it appeared to be sleeping. The feathers on the bottom of the wings were a shade of light yellow. Despite it lying on the ground, it still looked to be the size of a small house.

Everyone had stepped onto the clearing slowly and quietly as to avoid disturbing the large creature. Wendy looked up at the sky above them, straining to see through the heavy rain. She noticed the light grey circle, surrounded by the almost black storm clouds that seemed to spiral out, "Is that what the mayor was talking about?" She had said quietly, pointing up to the sky.

Everyone looked up at what the small dragon slayer was pointing at, with Natsu suddenly running off in the direction of the creature. Natsu had jumped into the air, "Fire Dragon's Iron Fist!" he had screamed as he landed on the bird's head. The creature had opened its eyes at the sudden sound and stood up, spreading its wings and hovered a metre or so off the ground. The bird made a sound that was louder than an entire flock of birds all screeching at the same time, and the movement of the wings was enough for the trees on either side of it to be pushed down and uprooted. Natsu had been sent flying off, and Happy was holding on to Lucy's leg to stop himself from being sent flying with the forceful wind the creature was generating.

"Open gate of the golden bull, Taurus!" Lucy stood at the back as Taurus appeared just in front of her, swinging his axe around before running off towards the bird with everyone else, "Go for the wings so it can't fly away!"

Taurus had been the first one to reach it but had been hit by what seemed to be a lightning strike that emanated from the bird's chest as soon as his axe was about to hit the creature, "I must go…" Taurus had said apologetically as he disappeared to the spirit world again.

Erza had immediately requipped to her Lightning Empress Armor as Laxus held out his arms, using his Thunder Bullets. The creature had screeched again as Laxus had hit one of its wings, with Erza apparently landing a hit on the other and forcing it to return to the ground.

Natsu had run up from behind the creature, landing a Fire Dragon's Roar to the back, while Gray had used his Ice Cannon to land a hit just below the creature's right eye.

The creature was unable to land any lightning-based attacks as it was being attacked from both the front and back, and couldn't focus on a single target. Wendy had used her Vernier enchantment as well as Arms.

Everyone was shouting various things for their various abilities and landing various attacks. Lucy had called out Sagittarius for the long ranged attack; Erza had requipped to her Black Wing Armor; Natsu was focusing his attacks on the back; Gray mainly using the ice cannon or his lance attack.

The creature was taking quite a beating from everyone, and it didn't seem to be anywhere near done with the group. Despite having injured wings, Lucy could tell it was trying to take off for flight again by the way they were moving. With a flick of her wrist, Fleuve d'étoiles had extended and had wrapped itself around the end of the left wing. The bird screeched loudly, and Lucy tried to pull back to stop the wing from moving so much, but she underestimated the strength the creature still had and was sent flying across the field, her back colliding the trunk of a tree with her whip uncoiling from around the wing and rolling across the ground.

Bickslow had frowned as he watched Lucy collide with the tree. He saw Wendy rush over to her side and returned his gaze to the creature, "Baryon Formation!" He had shouted, his dolls aligning and spinning around as they started to glow a bright green. The beam had hit the creature in the centre of the chest, pushing it backwards and into the trees at the far end of the clearing. Natsu had been thrown forward as it had moved, and was standing along with everyone else and trying to catch his breath, waiting for the bird's next move.

Everyone's hands went to their ears as it made a screech louder than any of the previous ones. They could hear the heavy wings flapping as it now hovered just in front of them.

"Wendy!" Natsu had shouted, deciding it was time to end it finally and give it everything he had.

The blue-haired dragon slayer moved away from the blonde, "Sky Dragon's Roar!" Natsu ran forward and into Wendy's roar, using the rotation and power from it to strengthen his own.

"Lightning Flame Dragon's Iron Fist!" Natsu had screamed as he came closer to the creature, landing his hit on the top of the bird's head as it screeched again. Everyone else had joined in, Laxus using his own Lightning Dragon's Roar; Evergreen using Fairy Machine Gun; Freed using his Destruction variant of Dark Écriture; and Gray using his Seven Slice Dance with the Ice swords that extended from his forearms.

The combined attacks seemed to finish the creature off as it feel back to the ground and formed a small crater from the weight of it. Those close enough to it had been sent flying backwards, namely Natsu, Freed, and Gray who were closest to the bird.

* * *

Everyone stood around in the clearing, panting as they all tried to catch their breath. Despite there being nine people there with all of them being members of arguably the two strongest teams of the guild, it had been a tough fight. The clearing itself had almost doubled in size along with the amount of trees that had been uprooted and pushed over in the surrounding area. Some were still smoking from being on fire, and there were multiple crater-like holes in the ground that had made it seem like Virgo had been let loose.

"So what exactly was that thing?" Evergreen had said as she pulled a twig from her hair.

"I remember reading something about a phoenix-like creature – lacking the fire, of course – that has been known for causing violent storms in specific areas. One hasn't been seen for nearly a century though." Freed said as he pushed himself up from the ground and walked over to where everyone was forming a small circle.

The group's thoughts were interrupted by Lucy's loud cry from one side of the clearing as they all turned to look in that direction. Erza and Wendy were trying to help the blonde stand since she hadn't been able to since she had hit the tree trunk, and the pain from trying to move was too much for her do so on her own. Wendy had tried to heal her, and the pain had gone down a bit, but she was confident it wasn't broken.

Gray and Natsu had made their way over to help Lucy stand without moving her too much. Bickslow had wanted to go over there, but Laxus had pulled him back after taking a single step. Instead, he just watched her team support her while he stood with his own team.

"Do you think you can walk, or do you want to be carried?" Gray had asked worriedly.

"I'll carry you, Luce!" Natsu had said before Lucy got a chance to speak.

"Let her answer, Flame-brain." Gray had said quickly, placing an ice wall right in front of Natsu, watching him run into it.

"What was that for, Ice-princess?"

"Guys, stop," Lucy sighed as they all turned to look at her, stopping their impending fight, "I don't need to be carried. If Erza and Wendy can help me walk then I'll be okay."

Erza and Wendy stood on either side of the blonde as she walked slowly with them holding her shoulders and stomach gently, wincing in pain with each step. Natsu and Gray walked just before them, with the Raijinshuu and Laxus at the front. Before they left the clearing, they had noticed that the 'eye of the storm'-esque cloud formation that sat above the field had disappeared, and the rain wasn't so heavy anymore.

The walk through the forest back to the town was longer, and Lucy felt guilty since she knew everyone was walking slower since she had been injured. No one had commented on it, and they all seemed to be tired out so they were in no rush to get back to the town. Bickslow had stopped worrying almost instantly when they had all finally defeated the creature and the weather had improved within minutes. He couldn't help but turn around and look at Lucy quickly every so often. He could see that she was in pain from the expression on her face, and he wanted to help her but he knew he couldn't.

"She'll be fine." Laxus had said quietly. He could tell his friend was worried about the blonde by the way he would turn around every so often before turning back to the front and frowning, occasionally kicking the odd stone that they walked over.

"I know." Bickslow mumbled.

The group had arrived back in town in the middle of the afternoon. The soaking wet and muddy group made their way back to the town hall, with the only noise being the murmurs from Evergreen and Freed, the quiet argument that Gray and Natsu were having, and the soft sound of the rain hitting the stone paths that was littered with small puddles.

* * *

The mayor was thankful for the group's work, and they had received a reward of a million Jewels, each person receiving 100,000J with the remaining 100,000 being deducted for the damage to the building that Natsu had done at some point.

Lucy was lying on her side in the bed in her room. Virgo had helped her clean herself up in the shower and Wendy had bandaged up the small cuts she had on her arms. The blonde couldn't see what her back had looked like in the mirror as it hurt to turn her head to look over her shoulder, but she figured it would be mostly covered in a dark bruise or it would be soon.

She had been resting peacefully when there was a knock on her door, "Come in," she had said quietly. She figured it would be the rest of the team, and sure enough the door opened and her friends piled into the small room.

"We come bearing gifts." Erza smiled as she placed a brown paper bag carefully on the table next to the bed before taking a seat on the chair in the corner.

Natsu and Wendy had climbed onto the bed next to her while Gray stood leaning against the wall next to where Erza sat.

Lucy sat up slowly, wincing in pain from the movement. She picked up the bag and opened it, smiling when she realised it was a bowl of warm soup from wherever everyone had just gone for dinner, "Thanks guys." Lucy said softly as she smiled.

"I'm sorry I can't help any more with the pain." Wendy said quietly as she looked down at the blanket she was sitting down to hide her frown.

"It's fine, Wendy. It is already feeling better thanks to you, it just hurts to move," Lucy smiled again before she took a spoonful of her soup, "this is really good!"

"So who do you think has the most bandages on them – Natsu or Erza?" Gray chuckled as everyone else slowly joined in.

"I win, of course!" Natsu said as he stood up on the bed quickly and pointed to Erza who was just smiling and shaking her head.

Lucy looked between the two. Natsu had one around his forehead, as well as both of his arms and his entire torso, and one ankle. Erza on the other hand had her left forearm bandaged, her elbow on her right arm and one going around her thigh on her left leg, "I think Natsu does win this one."

* * *

Bickslow could hear the laughter through the surprisingly thin walls. Suddenly the laughter had stopped and he could hear someone yelling over the maniacal laugh of what he could only assume was Natsu before the sound of something smashing against the ground, followed by some more yelling from everyone else in the room.

He had been sulking since he had returned to his room. He had wanted to go see how Lucy was doing, but of course he couldn't do that while her team surrounded her. Sighing, he got up from the bed he was lounging on and exited the room and made his way towards the room where Laxus was.

Laxus turned around when he heard his door open, seeing Bickslow walk into his room before he turned his attention back to the weather as he stood on the small balcony.

"Freed, get out." Bickslow had said as politely as he could muster to the green-haired mage that sat in the corner of the room. The man sighed and stood up from the chair with his book under his arm and left the room, mumbling something about Evergreen under his breath as the door closed.

Bickslow made his way out onto the small balcony and stood next to Laxus, placing his hands on the cold iron railing.

"I take it this is about Blondie?" Laxus said with a flat voice as he continued looking out over the gardens and pool, with the ripples caused from the rain visible on the surface. The grey sky would occasionally light up with the odd lightning flash in the distance and rumble of thunder.

"You already know the answer to that question." Bickslow mumbled.

Laxus smirked and turned to face the Seith mage, taking a step back to lean on the railing to the side of the balcony as he folded his arms across his chest, "So? Talk. You know I'd rather listen than talk."

The Seith mage sighed. Laxus was probably the only one he could talk to about anything since the man knew the most about the situation apart from himself, "I kissed her. Yesterday."

"Wait, what?" Laxus couldn't hide the shock on his face. He had known that his friend had realised his feelings for the blonde, but he didn't think that he would move on them; much less so soon after he had admitted them to himself, "I told you to _talk_ to her, not _kiss_ her.

"And then we got sent here, but then we kissed on the train again… and then I told her that I did like her after she basically forced it out of me…" Bickslow glanced at Laxus quickly before he looked at the gardens below him again.

"And?"

"And then I asked her out on a date later last night… and now I can't even go talk to her because of her stupid team. I don't even know what I'm doing… it just… felt right." Bickslow turned away from the railing and sat on the wicker chair that was just behind him. He didn't like being confused and second-guessing everything he did.

"You? On a date? Have you even been on a date before?" Laxus said with an amused tone. Sure, he was glad that the Seith mage had finally done something about the blonde, but he had never known the man to go on a date in all the years that he had known him.

"Like you can talk…" Bickslow mumbled.

"You could try talking to Ever. I'm sure she knows more about dates than Freed does… and I'm guessing you don't want to talk to Mira." Laxus could only imagine what Mira would do with that information, supressing the shudder that followed after the thought.

Bickslow pushed himself up from the chair slowly, "Maybe. I should probably go find Freed to tell him he can come back to the room." He walked back into the room as Laxus turned to look out over the gardens and pool once again, admiring the weather. _This guy has some weird habits,_ Bickslow thought to himself.

Evergreen's room was next door to where Laxus and Freed were staying, so he knocked on the door quietly before pushing it open. Evergreen was sitting on the bed painting her nails, and Freed was sitting on the chair in the corner reading again.

"Have you come to kick me out of this room too?" Freed looked up from his book to eye Bickslow.

"Nah, you can stay if you want. You just can't tell anyone what you hear." Bickslow shrugged. Freed was going to find out sooner or later if he didn't already know from Laxus or Evergreen, and he didn't think Freed would be the one to spill his secrets.

"You didn't get anyone pregnant, did you?" Evergreen chuckled at Freed's remark while she painted her thumb a pastel green.

Bickslow walked over to the bed before sitting next to Evergreen and turning to face Freed with a frown, "No, Freed," He turned back to Evergreen, "What exactly am I required to do on a date?"

Evergreen instantly turned her head to stare at Bickslow, "Is this for the same person who I think it is?" The Seith mage nodded as the Fairy Queen smirked before focusing on her nail-painting once again, "Well, I don't know much about her so I don't know."

Bickslow frowned, "You're no help at all. Now I have to talk to Mira when we get back."

"Who exactly are you talking about?" Freed asked with one eyebrow raised, realising that he had been left in the dark about certain thinks over the last week.

"Lucy." Evergreen had said almost instantly.

"Shut up, Ever." Bickslow mumbled.

"Lucy?"

"Yes." Bickslow sighed and fell back on the bed, crossing his arms under his head.

"When did that happen?" Freed asked as he closed his book and placed it on the coffee table.

 _It's going to be a long night_ , Bickslow thought to himself, readying himself to start the story from the beginning.

* * *

 **So if you haven't already guessed, I'm trying to draw out their 'relationship' so they don't just randomly jump into it, because... that's just no fun. So for those who want that to happen, I apologise. It's coming soon, I promise! But again, it's not something that's going to happen suddenly because I don't think either of them would do that kind of thing. (Semi-spoilers but not really?)**

 **Again, please review if you can! I love reading what you guys think of them! Tell me what I'm doing wrong/right/whatever is on your mind!**

 **As always, I hope you enjoyed reading it. :D**

 **\- April**

 **P.S Yes, I changed my username again. April's-works just wasn't cutting it for me.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Alright. It's up a little earlier this week. Just a reminder that I officially go back to uni in a month, and since it's a nursing degree I'm not sure how much time I'll have. Worst case scenario, it gets updated once a fortnight or month or something. I'll figure it out!**

 **CelticHeart13 - How to Date Anonymous. Oh my. I'm picturing him sitting at the very back in a disguise along with both Laxus and Ever. Even Freed would be there (following Laxus, of course). Every song you've mentioned so far is amazing. The Porn Star Dancing one made me laugh as I pictured Bickslow with his tongue hanging out whilst he was in a strip club with Laxus... I don't even know anymore.**

 **But 'awkweirdness'. Why isn't this a word to begin with?!**

 **Kurahieiritr JIO - I was honestly debating having Bicks scream/run or something but I feel like it would have been too soon for him to do something like that.**

 **I'm going to have some fun with Mira and Bickslow eventually, and I'm laughing about it now as I type this out. *laughing evilly***

 **Anyway guys, I hope you enjoy. The date will be in the next chapter, I promise!  
**

* * *

The group arrived at Magnolia station just after noon and they all headed towards the guild as they quietly chat amongst themselves. Freed had informed everyone that the bird-like creature they had fought was in fact called a Storm Phoenix and they were known to cause large, violent storms. Thankfully, they didn't have the regenerative abilities of the usual Phoenix, and they could all rest easy knowing that the town wouldn't be plagued by bad weather until Winter came around.

Lucy walked behind the group with Natsu and Happy as Wendy talked to Carla as Gray and Erza talked quietly. The Raijinshuu and Laxus were a few metres ahead, with Bickslow and Freed teasing Evergreen about Elfman – well, it was mainly Bickslow doing the teasing and Freed just agreeing occasionally. Laxus seemed to be off in his own world as he walked slightly ahead of everyone else.

"Is that how you treat someone who gives you advice?" Evergreen had crossed her arms as she kept walking.

Bickslow grinned as his tongue lolled from this mouth, "Freed was more useful than you."

"I have to agree with him there… I heard your advice, Ever. No wonder you and Elfman don't seem to get along half the time…" Freed smiled softly as he looked at his friends.

"We don't… I don't… Oh, just shut up, you two." Evergreen scowled as Bickslow laughed. Even Laxus smirked to himself.

The Seith mage had been in good spirits all morning. He had a date planned out thanks to Freed (surprisingly), and all he had to do now was find a time to talk to the blonde… preferably without all of her friends around.

Luckily, that time came sooner rather than later. Natsu and Happy had gone running into the guildhall as soon as the building was in sight, screaming about finding a dangerous mission with a good reward while Gray chased after him. Erza and Wendy had decided to go back to Fairy Hills first, while Laxus had mumbled about using the new bathhouses at the back of the guild while Freed followed, and Evergreen presumably went to go find Elfman at the bar.

While everyone else had been walking into the guild, Bickslow had fallen back behind the group and had been walking silently next to Lucy. Once the doors had closed, he moved an arm around the blonde to rest his hand on her shoulder and turned her away from the doors gently and started leading them through the outdoor café at the front of the guild and past the gift shop, stopping at a table that was far enough away from everyone out there.

Bickslow saw her wince as she sat down, a worried look on his face as he sat down beside her, "How are you feeling?" He asked quietly.

Lucy looked up at the man. She could tell that he was concerned from his tone and the slight frown. She smiled weakly, thinking that it was nice seeing that side of him, "I'm okay. It's still a bit sore when I move around a bit, but I can walk on my own at least."

"Well, I was going to see if you were free tomorrow night, but if you're still in too much pain then, we can go out another night."

Lucy blushed slightly as she realised he was talking about the date she had agreed to, "I think I'll be fine by tomorrow night. What should I expect on this date?"

Bickslow rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly, "Uh… can that be a surprise? I'd hate to ruin the fun," He grinned as his tongue rolled from his mouth, "but wear something nice, I guess."

"Something nice? Okay then." The blonde giggled as she reached for a napkin on the table and a pen from her bag, writing down her address on it.

"I'll pick you up to 8?" Bickslow looked down at her address on the napkin as she handed it to him before he folded it up and put it in a pocket on the inside of his cloak.

"That's fine."

Bickslow stood up from the table, extending a hand to Lucy to help her to her feet. The two walked around the tables and back to the guild doors slowly before he stopped them again just to the side of the doors, "Well, I'll see you tomorrow night then. I doubt I'll have a chance to talk to you before then." Bickslow leant down to kiss the blonde on her temple quickly, and just as he moved his head away, the guild doors burst open.

"LUCY?" Natsu had screamed, "Where did Lucy go?"

"I'm right here, Natsu…" Lucy said awkwardly as she took a step away from Bickslow, as he did the same. _That was close_ , she thought.

"Oh, there you are!" Natsu started running over to where the two stood, apparently not realising how awkward and embarrassed they seemed. He had also seemingly not noticed the Seith mage at all until he got closer, "Yo, Bickslow! What are you doing out here with Lucy?"

"Uh… we were just talking about the mission from last week," Bickslow was mentally thanking every God for Natsu being totally oblivious to everything around him and just generally being dense as he started walking past the Dragon Slayer and towards the doors that were closing slowly, "I'll see you around, guys."

"Well, come on, Luce! I found a job for everyone to do!" Natsu started leading the blonde into the guildhall.

"No, Natsu… we just got back and I'm still sore from yesterday…" Lucy sighed in defeat, realising that he wasn't listening as he dragged her towards the table where Gray sat.

* * *

Lucy spent the rest of the night at the guild talking and laughing with everyone. Gray, Erza, and Wendy had all said no to going on another job, and so did Lucy, leaving Natsu to throw a slight tantrum until Happy had pointed out the fact they could buy so much more fish if they didn't have to share the reward, and they shot out the doors to get started that night.

Lucy had just used her sore back as an excuse for not going with them because the probability of her getting hurt was very likely, and she didn't feel like being in any more pain.

That, and her impending date with Bickslow.

If someone had asked her a month earlier if she'd even consider going on a date with the man, she would have said no in a heartbeat. But then she noticed him looking over in her direction occasionally in the guild, and she found herself strangely curious and she would often find herself glancing over in _his_ direction occasionally.

And then Cana's cards had put them on that job a few towns over and she found herself dumbfounded when he didn't crack one perverted joke or act like his usual obnoxious, easy-going, jack-ass self that everyone in the guild had come to know and love - hell, even expect from the man.

Lucy knew that when she ended up waking up next to him in the bed that morning, she should have freaked out, but she couldn't bring herself to that. It had felt… natural, comfortable… _right._ She had originally told herself that it was only because she had gotten used to Natsu sneaking into her house and bed in the middle of the night, but she knew it wasn't, but much like Bickslow, she was pushing those thoughts to the back of her head.

Of course, when she had gone on her mission with Natsu before the guild party, she had forgotten all of it, but Natsu and his crazy ideas had gone and made her remember all of it and she realised she couldn't deny that there was something else there, especially when Gajeel had so bluntly put what Bickslow had been thinking when the Demon and Script mage couldn't. Her heart had leapt with the possibility of the Seith mage liking her after she had accepted her own feelings for him.

And all of it had almost nearly been torn down when she had almost walked away from him in his drunken state in the early hours of the morning.

But then he had kissed her and admitted that he liked her, and everything had changed again, because she remembered that after that it was like he was finally going back to his usual self, and he seemed genuinely comfortable around her. All it had taken was that one kiss and one day, and that made her happy.

"What are you smiling at, Lucy?"

Lucy blinked, remembering that she was still in the guild. She looked at Gray who was staring at her with curiosity, "Just some happy memories, I guess," She smiled brightly as she looked at the clock on the far wall and stood up, "I'm going to head home now, so good night, guys!" She waved at various people as she headed towards the doors as a few other 'goodbyes' echoed through the hall.

* * *

Bickslow turned his head as he heard the high voice of the script mage behind him saying 'Night, Lucy.' His eyes followed her as she walked towards the door; only turning back once the doors had closed behind her.

Something inside of him was telling him to chase after her to at least walk her home, just so he could be near her again, but he had to tell himself not to. _You can't go running after her. You haven't even gone on a date yet, and you've already kissed her several times and slept in the same bed twice. Even_ you _know that that's out of order and too fast… slow down!_

 _But when exactly have you done things in order?_

Bickslow shook his head lightly. Now was not the time to be having a mental argument with himself. He was in a good mood and he was with his friends, and there was no reason to let the rest of the night be anything other than fun.

He made his way over the bar, grabbing drinks for the rest of his table. Bickslow looked around the guild as he waited for Mira, noticing that it was strangely quiet. _Probably because there's no Natsu…_

He smiled as Mira placed the mugs on the bar in front of him, and as he was about to carefully pick them all up he stopped himself, and left them on the bar as he turned around the face the rest of the guild.

"Hey! What are we doing?" Bickslow yelled as he grinned, his tongue lolling from his mouth as many stopped to stare at the commotion, "This is Fairy Tail! It's too quiet in here! It's not Fairy Tail unless there's a party!"

There was a moment of silence as everyone seemed to look at each other, before they all raised their mugs in their hands in the air as loud cheers erupted from the hall.

Bickslow's grin widened as he picked up one of the mugs on the bar behind him and downed it all in one big gulp, laughing one of his crazier laughs (you know… the one that sounds more like a cackle) as he made his way through the now rowdy guild and back to his table.

"Welcome back." Laxus muttered as Bickslow returned to the table, smirking slightly.

"I never left." Bickslow laughed as he slid the mugs around the table and got ready to enjoy the rest of his night.

 _This is home._

* * *

Lucy walked into the guild the next morning, smiling as she saw Juvia announce another anniversary as Gray tried to escape her clutches while Wendy and Carla played with Asuka.

As usual, her first stop was the bar. Lucy took a seat next to Erza who sat holding a fork so tight her knuckles were white, "Uh… Erza, are you okay…?" She asked sceptically.

Erza's grip on the fork tightened, "Mira baked a cheesecake this morning. She said she'd bring me a slice when it's done, so I'm waiting for it."

Lucy laughed quietly as she shuffled on the stool, a little scared of what Erza would do with that fork is she were to say something else. Luckily, Mira walked out from the kitchen and towards the bar with the freshly made cake and she realised she was safe… for now.

"Good morning, Lucy! Yoghurt today?" Mira said she moved to stand in front of the blonde, pouring a glass of juice and placing it back down on the bar.

"Please," Lucy smiled, taking a sip of the juice, "Do you think Natsu will be back today, Erza?"

"Doubtful. Maybe tomorrow." Erza mumbled between pieces of cake.

Lucy sighed before taking another sip of her juice, "I hope he doesn't get into too much trouble on his own."

"He'll be fine. Happy is with him, and it's a job he can do easily on his own." Mira appeared behind the bar once more, placing the bowl of yoghurt with strawberry slices and oats before the blonde.

Lucy ate with Erza who was onto her second (or was it third?) piece of cake for the morning, silently flicking through the newest edition of Sorcerer Weekly as Cana mumbled, slumped over a barrel next to her. She was interrupted as the guild doors were suddenly flung open as Gajeel stood in the doorway looking furious.

"Where the hell is he?" He demanded, looking around the guild. Everyone in the room seemed to stop and look towards the Iron Dragon Slayer.

"He's not here yet, Gajeel." Mira said cheerily.

"Hmph." Gajeel kicked the doors closed as he walked over to where Levy sat behind a tower of books.

Lucy glanced around curiously before she turned back to Mira, "What did I miss? Who is he looking for?"

Mira stopped wiping down the glass she had in her hands, "Oh, that's right. You left before that happened."

"What happened, Mira?"

The Take-Over mage shrugged as she smiled again, "The guild got a little crazier after you left… Bickslow may have started it, but it would have happened sooner or later…" She picked up another glass, starting to wipe it down.

"You missed the good part." Erza chimed in, pushing her empty plate away.

Mira sighed, "Well, Gajeel decided to start singing but Bickslow infused one the souls in his possession with his guitar… and then it may have broken itself on Gajeel's head…"

"Thank God for that, too." Cana mumbled as the other three women at the bar turned to look at her.

"He's not that bad," Mira giggled, "but Bickslow ran out laughing pretty soon after and Gajeel didn't chase after him."

Lucy blinked a few times, _so Bickslow's back to his old self, huh?_ She thought, "Well, I'm honestly with Cana on this one." The blonde giggled as she stood from the stool and started walking away from the bar.

* * *

Lucy had sat next to the small Script mage as she poured over the blonde's newest chapter in her story. Lucy occasionally looked up from her own book that Levy had given her whenever Gajeel would start drumming his fingers on the table, muttering furiously every time the doors to the guild opened.

Lucy had just returned from the bar with a strawberry smoothie in her hands and was in the process of sitting back down and placing the glass on the table when Gajeel suddenly stood up, "YOU!" The man was pointing towards the wide open doors as Lucy tried to stop her drink from spilling everywhere as she almost dropped it at the sudden sound.

"Oh… crap." Bickslow muttered as he gulped, standing motionless in the door, but ultimately ready to bolt in a second.

"Gajeel, don't." Levy said pleadingly as she had somehow wrapped her arms around the Dragon Slayer as she tried to hold him in place, even though the man could get out of her grasp without even trying.

Bickslow was cautiously making his way over to the table, seeing that Levy had restrained the man for the time being.

Lucy looked between the two men with her eyes wide. Gajeel still looked furious as his fists clenched by his sides as Levy loosened her grip, and Bickslow was smirking, obviously still finding it entertaining.

"How's your head?" Bickslow's smirk turned into that wide grin that he was known for, as Gajeel growled and tried to punch him in the face, only to be dodged by the Seith mage as he ran out the guild laughing maniacally with Gajeel chasing after him.

"Gajeel!" Levy called after him as she regained her balance against the edge of the table, before she went chasing after the two.

"W-wait! Levy!" Lucy scrambled from the table, not wanting to be left alone, and headed outside like many others who were in the guild at the time.

Bickslow was laughing as he ran around the outdoor café, successfully dodging all of Gajeel's club attacks which was just making him all the more furious. It went on like that for a few minutes; with Bickslow dodging, ducking, diving, hopping, and weaving his way through the tables that were now mostly broken.

The Seith mage was aware of the crowd that had gathered around the doors and he didn't care since he found it all entertaining, but it was only when a certain blonde made her way to the front and he caught her gaze that he had lost focus, and he suddenly felt something being shoved against his side before being sent through the brick and iron fence that surrounded the guild as he went tumbling to the ground with the bricks and the iron rods.

Quiet gasps came from the crowd, many just shook their heads and turned to go back into the guild and get on with their day, while others just stood motionless and some had moved forward to see what was going on behind the wall.

Levy had been the first to go, with Lucy just behind her. The small Script mage was once again trying to pull Gajeel back, despite him having already pulled Bickslow to his feet to have him pressed against the solid part of the wall next to the gate as he held him by the collar of his shirt.

"Gajeel, don't. Let him go." Levy pleaded as she tried to pull him away.

Gajeel looked over his shoulder slightly before relaxing his grip on the Seith mage, turning back to glare at him, "You owe me a guitar." The Dragon Slayer brought his arm back to his side as he turned away and gave in to Levy's attempts at dragging him away.

Bickslow grinned again, "Well, why didn't you just say that in the first place?"

Before anyone could react, Gajeel had turned around and punched the Seith mage in the nose, pushing his head back into the wall where a small crack in the bricks was now located, before shrugging off the bluenette and walking back into the guild.

Levy had her hands over her mouth as her eyes followed Gajeel, giving one sad look to Bickslow who now sat on the ground holding his nose before turning to head back into the guild like everyone else.

Lucy stood on the pavement for a few moments, looking down at Bickslow with a frown as he chuckled softly to himself.

"That is one thick wall," He said quietly, still laughing slightly.

"Can you walk?" Lucy stepped forward, extending her arm to Bickslow who grabbed her hand with his not-so-bloodied hand, pulling himself to his feet with her help. He nodded once he was on his feet, "Go find Wendy."

She walked over to the scattered bricks and picked up the helmet that was lying amongst them before dusting off the dust from some of the shattered bricks. Lucy turned it over in her hands as she walked back over to Bickslow who was slowly making his way towards the gates, sighing when she saw half of the visor part of it had been broken off.

Lucy passed it to Bickslow as they walked through the gates. She frowned at the sight of him; the hand holding his nose was covered in blood that ran down his arm and his face and neck. His clothes were torn up on the side that had gone through the wall, with a large cut just above his elbow visible through one of the tears.

Lucy could see the cold glare that Gajeel was giving Bickslow as they walked back into the guild, and he could see the smirk that had formed on Bickslow's face. She shook her head lightly as she made her way to where Gray and Erza were sitting while Bickslow headed towards the small infirmary.

She knew that Bickslow was one for generally shrugging things off with a laugh because of his light-hearted nature, but she still wondered how he could manage to laugh and smile through that, and he hadn't even tried to defend himself from it, and she realised that he had just thought of it as a game… a game that he had lost… or maybe he thought he had won? Lucy really wasn't sure.

Sighing again, she stood up from the table with Gray and Erza and made her way over to her forgotten smoothie. She would have time to wonder about Bickslow's sanity another time.

* * *

Bickslow sat on one of the beds in the small infirmary, mindlessly rubbing the large bump that had formed on the back of his head. He looked at Laxus out of the corner of his eye when Laxus walked into the room just as Wendy left, throwing a bundle of clothes at him that just flopped onto the bed.

"Was it really worth it?" Laxus said flatly as he sat on the lounge next to one of the beds, crossing his arms over his chest.

"It was fun," Bickslow said as he stood up and pulled the curtain around the bed just enough so Laxus wasn't seeing him change, "did you get these from my house?" He eyed the shirt for a moment before he pulled it over his head, the sleeve on one arm resting uncomfortably on the bandage around his elbow from the large cut he had received from what he assumed to be the top of one of the iron bars.

"Yes, and I don't see how you could find that fun. Granted, I found it fun to watch, but you're more twisted than I am sometimes…" Laxus mumbled as he looked towards the door, hearing the footsteps as they got closer.

Bickslow finished pulling on the black jeans from the pile of clothes, "Perverted, occasionally, but twisted, not really," he stuck his head around the curtain to see Laxus walking out of the room – most likely with a smirk on his face – and Lucy standing next to the doorway with an eyebrow raised in question, "Uh… that's not… how much did you hear?" He frowned as he pushed the curtain back and made his way back to the bed he been on before.

Lucy moved to stand closer to the bed he was sitting at, and her blank face turned to a slight frown when she saw him wince slightly as he brought a knee up to his chest to pull on his shoes, "You're an idiot."

"Sometimes." He mumbled as he brought his other knee up.

"No, really. That was really idiotic provoking Gajeel like that," she paused for a moment as she watched him put his leg back down so both feet were resting on the ground as his hands held the edge of the mattress, "I'm not saying that he didn't deserve getting his guitar broken… but maybe not on his head. And you deserved getting punched in the face, I'm sorry." She tried to stop the slight smirk that was forming, but she was doing a bad job at it. Lucy had planned to go into the room to tell him how stupid he was, but… she couldn't. As disappointed as she was with him, she couldn't deny that it was a little entertaining to see Bickslow get what was coming to him. Plus, Gajeel was still fuming about his broken guitar, which was entertaining alone.

Bickslow laughed gently, wincing again slightly at the pain in his side. He noticed the slight frown on her face as he did so. He leant forward off the bed slightly and reached out and grasped her wrists, pulling her closer to where he sat, "I'm sorry for pissing Gajeel off-"

"No you're not."

"-but are we still on for tonight?" Bickslow wasn't going to lie; he was pretty excited for their date. But he wouldn't be all that surprised if she cancelled it after his little stunt, but he really hoped she didn't. He'd had to get up earlier than usual that morning to make sure he could get a reservation for that night, and he was glad that Freed knew the owner since it was usually hard to get a table.

She stood back a little bit as she raised an eyebrow in question, "Didn't I just see you get sent through a brick fence? Are you even okay?"

Bickslow let go of one of her wrists to wave his hand, dismissing her question it seemed, "This is nothing. I'm fine," he brought his hand back down, "So are we?"

Lucy thought for a moment. She realised that she wasn't all that surprised he said he was fine, and he did seem fine for the most part. If anything, it was a glorified school-yard fight between teenagers – albeit slightly destructive teenagers – and she had known Bickslow to be fairly resilient despite not actually being excessively strong himself (according to Loke, anyway).

"Fine. But you have to promise me something."

It was Bickslow's turn to raise an eyebrow,

"No more smashing guitars on Gajeel's head. Or smashing guitars at all."

"What if it really needs to be done before everyone's ears start bleeding?"

"Bickslow." The beginnings of a cold glare… one that would surely terrify Bickslow was forming.

"Fine." He grinned as he stood before gently pushing the blonde towards the door, "You should go first. I already have Mira giving me weird looks thanks to Ever."

"How much does she know now?" Lucy asked as she moved closer to the door on her own now.

"Not as much as she wants to," He moved around the room to gather up his usual clothes that were now either torn, had bloodstains on them, or dust from the bricks, "I'll see you later."

"Alright…" She pulled the door open before turning back, "and stay away from Gajeel… and guitars!"

Bickslow smirked as the door closed. _Well, at least she didn't yell… or cancel the date._ He moved over to where a mirror sat in the room, noticing the slight bruise forming around his nose. Frowning, he turned to the side and lifted up his shirt, revealing the large, dark, and tender bruise that had already formed from where Gajeel had hit him with his iron club. The mark went from the middle of his rib-cage to just below his waist, spreading more towards his front based on the angle he had been hit at. He poked at in a few times, wincing at the pain.

 _Well,_ mostly _fine._

* * *

 **Bickslow, Laxus, and Gajeel are more or less going to be the guys that are actually best friends despite hating each other most of time, because they're all in/going to be in similar situations (I'll get there... eventually). This chapter was basically another filler chapter, but I hope it wasn't too terrible.**

 **Anyway, remember to leave a review if you can!**

 **Also, chapters for A Peculiar Situation will probably be going up around the same time as these. The chapters are shorter, so there might be two chapters a week for that. And yes, it's another BixLu fic because they're just fucking adorable, okay? (Excuse my language).**

 **\- April**


	10. Chapter 10

**What is this?! Two chapters in two days?! Hehehe. I may have had an ulterior motive to upload Chapter 9 yesterday. ;)**

 **Sooooo, I feel kind of terrible now, because I think I've been hyping up the whole date thing a bit? And it's not even that spectacular! I barely did anything on it, but... I will say that there will be more dates in the future (duh), so I apologise if it's disappointing.**

 **Shattered-nightmares712 - I honestly don't know if it's that hard! I only started the course last year but I got sick and ended up having to defer my course for a year, so I'm technically starting my first year in a month! I've heard it's a little frustrating because of the hours for prac and then shift work etc., but I think it will be worth it! Also, if you mean the specialty, I'm thinking either Surgical or Pediatric, depending on whether or not I can put up with kids by the time I'm done with the course haha. It's still a while off, so we'll see!**

 **CelticHeart13 - Oh, I see what you did there with that pun. ;)  
Oh... Gajeel as Iron Man... I... may end up using that in my other story! If you let me of course? Heheh.  
And I'm sorry - no Natsu freaking out. The 'reveal' will be much more entertaining, and cute. I promise! (Sort of spoilers?)**

 **Thank you guys for comments on the personality/lack of OOC-ness! There's always going to be moments where they are OOC (Bickslow actually dating/having feelings? Come on...), but I'm glad you're finding it okay! I'm also glad that you seemed to enjoy the Bickslow and Gajeel scene. That was fun to write, I admit. I see them both as just massive pranksters (and softies) at heart, and it's more a less a war to find out who is the better one? Who knows.**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter! It's... I don't know. It's just another chapter that's 'there' and doesn't do much imo.**

* * *

Lucy paced her living room, staring up at the clock on the wall every minute or so. She found herself standing in front of her mirror once again, _Oh God, what if this isn't nice? What if it's too fancy? What if it isn't fancy enough?_ She began smoothing out her clothes and fiddling with the light-tan coloured cardigan she had over it.

The dress was a navy blue 'V'-neck halter that hugged her top half until the material that formed the straps folded over around her waist where it hung loosely, reaching her mid-thigh. The heels were the same colour as her cardigan, and the three parallel strips ran around her ankle; just before her toes; and around the middle of her foot, keeping them secure on her feet.

Lucy fiddled with the sleeves on the cardigan, pushing them up to her elbows and pulling them down to her wrists over and over. _You look fine, Lucy. Calm down!_ She told herself as she began fiddling with the sections of her hair that framed her face. Lucy sighed before turning to sit on her couch to stare at the clock.

 _7:46pm._

 _That means he won't be here for another fourteen minutes, if he really meant 8pm._

 _What if he's one of those people who get to places early?_

 _No, no. That can't be him. He made a point of getting to the train station at the last possible minute._

Pushing herself up from her lounge, she walked over to her kitchen, filling up a glass of water before sitting on her bench and stared at the ground while mindlessly taking small sips.

 _Relax. It's a date. With Bickslow._

 _A date… with Bickslow._

Lucy didn't know whether to be excited or scared about it, but she had a feeling she should feel more excited than anything. After all, she had agreed to it, and she had been nervous about it all day before she left the guild. _It was going to be fine_ , she told herself again.

* * *

Bickslow walked through the streets of Magnolia. He knew he had left too early, and he knew that Lucy's house was only a few streets over and would take only a few minutes to walk there, so he found himself finding a longer route to kill the time. Despite this, he still found himself walking along Strawberry Street a few minutes later, apparently having walked faster than he had originally planned.

 _What if I'm still too early? What if she's mad I'm too early…_

"Do you think I'm too early?" He said quietly as he crossed the bridge over the canal.

"Early! Early!" The dolls chirped as they flew around his head some more.

Sighing, he found himself staring at her building. He lifted one of his arms slightly as he balled his fist. The white glow emanating from the centre was barely escaping between his fingers as he moved the souls out from each of the dolls as their bodies disappeared with a dull flash and returned to what Bickslow referred to as his 'toy box', before opening the main door to her building and heading up the stairs.

Bickslow stood outside her door, staring at the wood-grain of it before his gaze flicked to the clock that hung just down the hall.

 _7:53pm._

 _That's fine, right?_

He looked down at his clothes once more, smoothing out the tiny creases in the burgundy dress shirt he had on under his black suit jacket. He was honestly surprised when he found that he actually owned a normal suit and shirt when he was going through his wardrobe.

 _Alright, you can do this._

Rolling his shoulders, he lifted his hand up to the door to knock on it lightly. He heard what sounded like a small shriek, followed by a quiet thump from within her apartment before the door opened a few seconds later.

"Hey," Bickslow grinned as he looked down at the blonde in the doorway, "You look great." _Good. Fantastic. Awesome. Perfect? Yeah, let's stick with great._

"Thank you," Lucy blushed slightly before looking over his choice of clothes, _Damn, he owns a normal suit?_ _Where was_ that _at the Grand Magic Games ball?_ She thought to herself.

"So… are you ready to go?"

Lucy nodded as she stepped back into her apartment, picking up her keys and her black bag and placed it over her shoulder, letting it hang level with her hips and pulling the door closed behind her as she stepped into the hall.

The two walked down the quiet street that was illuminated only by the street lamps that littered the path.

"So, where are you taking me?" Lucy asked as she turned to step onto the edge of the canal.

"A small restaurant not too far from here." Bickslow frowned as he watched her step onto the edge, "Is that even safe, Cosplayer?"

Lucy giggled as she continued walking on the edge of the canal, "It's perfectly safe, and are you ever going to stop calling me Cosplayer?"

"Unlikely."

* * *

Bickslow pulled out a chair for the blonde once they reached their table at the restaurant, "Such the gentleman." Lucy had said as she sat down on it.

"Like I've said before, I can be if I want to be. Do you not want me to be one?" Bickslow smirked slightly before he shrugged off his jacket and hung it over the back of his own chair before sitting down and rolling his shirt sleeves up to just below his elbows.

"No, I like it." Lucy smiled as she looked out over the canal. The restaurant was situated on the edge of the canal, with their table pushed against the ivy-lined fence that surrounded the outdoor seating area.

A waiter came out a few moments after they had sat down, placing their menus in front of them and filling the empty glasses with white wine before turning away from the table.

Lucy looked up from her menu to take a sip of the wine before her gaze flicked over to Bickslow who was still looking down and reading his own menu. Despite the only light in the outdoor area coming from the candles that sat on each table and the streetlamps in the surrounding area, she could see the darker bruise around his nose before it disappeared under the mark that sat between his eyes and it reminded her of the question that she had forgotten to ask during the game on the train.

"Is it a mark or a tattoo?" She asked as she closed the menu and placed it on the edge of the table.

"Huh?" Bickslow looked up from his own menu and met her gaze.

"The figure on your face," Bickslow ran a finger down his nose as he realised what she had meant, ignoring the light pain from the bruising, "Is it a mark or a tattoo?"

He leant back in his chair as he folded his arms across his chest, shrugging, "It's not a tattoo. Apparently I was born with it, so I always assumed it had something to do with my magic." Bickslow picked up the menu as he leant forward again to continue reading it.

Lucy nodded as she picked up her wine glass, "So do all Seith mages have similar marks?"

"Some do, some don't," He paused as he picked up his own glass, "But I figure that's what makes me all the more awesome."

* * *

Lucy and Bickslow found themselves wandering through a park on the opposite side of town somehow, apparently having gotten lost in their conversation after leaving the restaurant.

Being just before midnight, the park was empty. Lucy almost instantly pulled off her heels and started walking across the grass with her shoes hanging from her hands, making a beeline for a bench that sat under a tree.

The blonde sat on the bench, placing her shoes next to her as she swung her feet out before her while looking up at the sky, disappointed with the lack of stars out for the night. Bickslow sat down on the bench next to her before leaning back to look up at the sky too, wondering what could be so entertaining about looking at an almost blank sky.

"Bickslow?" Lucy said quietly.

The Seith mage lowered his gaze to look at the blonde, "Yeah?"

"I was just… I just noticed that you seemed a little uncomfortable whenever the waiter came over to the table at the restaurant. You wouldn't speak much and you seemed to look away or down at the table whenever someone came over."

Bickslow frowned as he leant forward and looked down at the grass, "Sorry." He mumbled.

Lucy found herself looking down at the grass also, "Was it because you didn't have your visor?" She asked quietly, "I was just wondering… just in case it was my fau-"

"It wasn't your fault. It never could be your fault." Bickslow looked up from the grass to look over to the blonde next to him. _How could she think it was her fault?_

"Oh… well, if you don't want to talk about it then that's okay." Lucy pushed herself up from the bench, holding her shoes in one hand as she held the other out to Bickslow as she smiled, "Come on, you can walk me home." Bickslow nodded as he took her hand and stood up from the bench, walking in a comfortable silence.

 _This feels… nice?_ Bickslow thought as he realised that he was still holding her hand as they got closer to her street. _Maybe I should let her let go…_ Bickslow loosened his grip slightly, just enough for her to be able to remove her hand if she wanted to, but instead she just gripped his hand tighter as she stepped onto the edge of the canal once again. _Well… that settles that_ , he thought to himself as the corners of his lips lifted up into a small smile.

"Alright, I have one more question." Lucy said, breaking the silence between them as they continued walked.

"You're full of questions tonight, Cosplayer." He said as he turned his head to the side to watch her.

"Is that a complaint?" She said with a slight frown.

"Nope. What's the question?"

"How come I haven't seen those dolls of yours floating around you lately?" Lucy stepped off the ledge and back onto the path as they passed the bridge, only to step back onto it once they were past it.

"Hmm," Bickslow brought his free hand up to his head, scratching the back of it through his hair, appearing to be in thought, "You mean these ones, right?" His five babies seemed to drop down from the sky to hover around his head before they moved to fly around the blonde.

Lucy jumped as one flew past her head while another flew past her leg before they all went to hover around Bickslow as they usual did.

"But in answer to your question, I guess I just don't find myself needing them around me all day anymore since I'm spending more and more time at the guild." Bickslow moved the souls out of the dolls once again as their physical bodies returned to the 'toy box'.

Lucy frowned as she watched him disappear. "Do they have their own names? Or are they just your 'babies?'"

Bickslow nodded, "They have their own names. I'll tell you them another time, don't worry." He noticed that she was still frowning as he looked down at her again, "Hey, stop frowning. I only did that because I'm pretty sure this is your house."

"Fine," Lucy sighed as she stepped off the ledge again and crossed the path to the main door to her building, smiling as Bickslow stepped in front of her to open the door and heading up the stairs with Bickslow trailing just behind her.

Lucy dropped her shoes on the ground outside her door as she looked around for the key to her door in her bag.

"So, how did I do?" Bickslow said with a grin.

"Are you asking how well you did on the date?" She raised an eyebrow as she looked up from her bag, only to see Bickslow shrug, "You did fine." The blonde laughed quietly as she pulled the key from the bag.

"Well, is that 'fine' as in I get a second date?" Bickslow took a step forward as he looked down at the blushing blonde before him.

"I-I suppose so…" She said with a smile as she looked up and met his gaze.

"Good." He quickly wrapped his arms around her waist and lifted her up, holding her close as he ignored the pain that ran through his side from the pressure. His grin widened at the shocked expression on her face before he moved his head forward, pressing his lips to hers gently, leaving them there for a moment while leaning them back slightly.

Lucy rested her hands on his chest as she closed her eyes, feeling Bickslow's arms tighten around her as he pulled her closer. She didn't care about the dull pain in her back, and she was glad that he was holding her up because she felt like she wouldn't have been able to stand on her own at that point.

She felt his lips slowly start to move against her own and soon enough found herself doing the same, feeling herself get lost in the way that he smelled. It had changed slightly. The overwhelming cinnamon wasn't as strong, but she felt it was still there. She still couldn't quite pick out what it was, but she didn't care all that much at that particular point in time.

Bickslow pulled his head back slightly, Lucy doing the same and leaving just a few inches between them.

"Much easier this way." The Seith mage grinned once again as he loosened his hold around the blonde while still holding her close.

Lucy found herself smiling softly, "Well, I don't think you're supposed to do that on a first date." She let out an airy laugh.

"Is that a complaint?"

"N-no…" Lucy blushed slightly as she looked at her hands that sat flat against his shirt, "but can you put me down now? It's kind of hurting my back to stay like this."

Bickslow almost instantly lowered the blonde to her feet gently, straightening up as he brought his hands back to his sides, "Oh crap, sorry. I forgot… are you okay?" His grin was replaced by a look of worry.

"I'm okay." She smiled once again, watching the worried look on his face slowly disappear. Lucy bent down to pick up her shoes as she turned to her side, placing her free hand on the door handle, "Thanks for tonight, Bickslow."

He brought a hand up to the back of his neck, realising that it was slowly becoming awkward, "Y-yeah," _Did you just stutter?_ "Well, it's late so… I'll be off… I guess." He started turning to the side, realising that he really didn't want to leave all that much, but he had to.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Lucy said quietly as she turned the door to her apartment, pushing it open slightly, "Good night, Bickslow." She smiled softly as she pushed the door open to walk into her apartment.

"Night, Cosplayer." He said with a wide grin, watching her walk into her apartment and closing the door before he turned to walk down the stairs.

"Fuck." He said quietly once he had made it outside. Bickslow shook his head as he walked down the dimly lit street.

 _I'm going to end up falling for her one day._

And then he realised that he had no idea what that meant, or what that was supposed to feel like, or if he already _was_ falling for her. He couldn't be, right? You weren't supposed to think about that after the first date.

" _Fuck."_

* * *

Lucy sat at the table with the rest of her team with her legs crossed as she slowly sipped away at the strawberry shake in her hand. Natsu had come back early that morning and was resting his head in his open palm while he leant forward, picking at the pile of bones on the plate before him from the lunch he had just finished.

"Erzaaa. Come on, I'm bored!" Natsu groaned as his head slipped from his hand and hit the table.

The red-haired mage just shook her head as she lifted the tea cup up to her lips, "No, Natsu. You only got back two hours ago."

"Yeah, even you need to rest sometimes." Gray said quietly as he leant back and folded his arms across his chest before turning his head to face Lucy, "And where did you disappear to yesterday? You left earlier than usual."

Lucy froze, realising that she hadn't thought of an excuse if anyone asked her where she had been… _Oh, you know. Just on a date with the guild's resident pervert, who – as it turns out – is actually not that much of a perv._ "Uh, my back was starting to get a little sore from the benches and I guess I didn't get much sleep the night before so I went home early." The blonde said with a slight smile. _That's believable, right?_

"Hmph, well." Gray unfolded his arms, leaning forward on the bench slightly, "Are you gonna be coming with us on the next job?"

Lucy nodded as she took another sip before Happy flew over to the table and dropped a pile of request flyers, with Natsu picking up a few while Erza, Gray, and Wendy each picked up one, quietly reading them to themselves.

* * *

Bickslow walked into the guild late in the afternoon with one hand over his mouth as he stifled a yawn, and the other holding a guitar case. He had spent most of the day walking around Magnolia looking for a music store that stocked guitars that weren't pink or purple. The Seith mage figured the Dragon Slayer wouldn't take too kindly to receiving a hot-pink guitar. Maybe _he'd_ be to get a guitar smashed on their head.

He spotted Gajeel sitting next to Levy. The bluenette seemed to be deciphering a code and muttering to herself quietly while Gajeel was noisily crunching on scrap pieces of metal while Lily was staring at the bowl of kiwifruit that sat in front of him on the table.

Bickslow walked up to the table with a grin, slamming the guitar case down on the table before Gajeel, making the kiwis in the bowl all launch into the air for a moment, "Done. One guitar." His tongue lolled from his mouth as his grin widened.

"Guitar! Guitar!" The dolls hovering around his head echoed.

Gajeel narrowed his eyes, staring up at him before looking down at the guitar case, flicking the locks up and opening the case. He nodded slightly, seemingly surprised that the case actually contained a guitar.

"What? Not even a thank you?" Bickslow frowned slightly as Gajeel looked back up.

The Dragon Slayer opened his mouth to speak, but before he could say anything, the small Script mage next to him chimed in, "Gajeel, play nice." Gajeel grunted in response as his mouth closed and returned his gaze to the black guitar and lifting it up and examining it more.

"Yeah, listen to your girlfriend." Bickslow said with a smirk as the dolls echoed the last word as Levy blushed before she returned back to her pile of books and decoding.

"I wonder what yours would think if she knew you were getting yourself into more trouble." It was Gajeel's turn to smirk as Bickslow's instantly faltered, his eyes narrowing.

"Huh? Whose girlfriend?" Levy looked up again, looking between the two men.

"No one's." The Seith mage said quickly as he turned to begin walking to where Laxus, Freed, and Evergreen sat, which unfortunately happened to be at the next table. _She's not even… damn it, Gajeel._

Gajeel smirked once again as Bickslow sent one last glare towards him as he started walking. Levy turned to the Dragon Slayer next to her, apparently forgetting the conversation she had had with Lucy a few days earlier, "Huh? What's going on? Who were you talking about?"

"Nothin', don't worry, Shrimp." Gajeel smirked again, shaking his head slightly as he began to start tuning the strings on his new guitar as Levy went back to her books again.

* * *

Lucy sat on the bed in the hotel room with her legs crossed under her as she hugged the pillow, resting her chin on the end of the pillow. Wendy sat on the end of another bed as she brushed her long hair, and Erza sat on another, polishing her armor.

The blonde sighed. All day she had been thinking of the Seith mage and the date from the previous night. She sighed quietly, realising that she had said she would have seen him in the guild today, but her team had left before he had arrived. Sure, 'I'll see you tomorrow' is just a saying, but she genuinely felt sad that she didn't get a chance to see Bickslow before she left.

 _Why the hell am I sad? It was only one date? Sure… a really great – surprisingly - first date_ (not that she had anything to compare it to) _, but still… I think I… miss him?_

Lucy looked to the clock on the wall before pushing her chin into the pillow more, "Guys,"

Erza looked up from her armor in her hands, "Yes, Lucy?"

"What do you guys think of Bickslow?" Lucy looked between the bluenette and the red-haired mage on either side of her, who both appeared to be considering the question.

"Why do you ask?"

Lucy shrugged, hugging the pillow tighter, "I don't know. When we went on that job the other week, I guess he just seemed different and it was making me curious." Sure, it wasn't the _whole_ truth, but it was close enough, "I'm just wondering what you guys think of him, since Erza, you've been in the guild longer than me, and Wendy, you got paired with him before."

"Hm," Erza looked back down to her armor, beginning to polish the shoulder-plate again, "Well, he never really seemed to be in the guild very often – none of the Thunder God tribe were, actually – but after the battle of Fairy Tail," she frowned slightly as she recalled the event, "he seems like he's made an effort to be better towards his comrades, like they all have, really. I know he's a strong mage, and he's a decent person like the rest of the group. I guess I don't know all that much about him… although, I do know he is a bit… odd, sometimes." Erza shrugged as she picked up another piece of armor that set next to her.

"I guess so," Lucy turned her head towards Wendy, "What about you?"

The young Dragon Slayer placed the hairbrush on the small bedside table, "He was quieter than he usually seems in the guild, but he was nice to me. He got himself hurt to protect me," Wendy picked up her own pillow to hug it tightly, "but I guess I don't know that much about him either."

"I thought as much." Lucy sighed again as she put the pillow back at the end of the bed before climbing under the covers and Wendy did the same in her bed. Erza was packing her armor away into one of the many suitcases that sat against the wall, "I guess it's good though."

"What is?" The requip mage turned off the lamp next to her bed as she climbed into her own, leaving the room a little darker.

"That they all made an effort to open up to the guild after Laxus was excommunicated," Lucy reached out to switch the lamp off between hers and Wendy's beds, "Even though it was technically so long ago, they all seem troubled by it sometimes." She frowned as she remembered Bickslow's reaction when she had brought it up by accident, "I don't know, really. I guess I'm just glad that everyone forgave them and they were able to open up to everyone."

Erza smiled into her pillow, "Family will always forgive family."

* * *

 **I hope it wasn't too bad! Like I said, there will be more dates in the future so that's why I didn't do much about it. It was kind of just more feelings and stuff, plus Gajeel's little comment about Lucy being Bickslow's girlfriend and Levy not paying attention... I just couldn't help myself with that.**

 **Blah, blah. More rambling. More feelings in the next chapter (lots of feelings because it's cute).**

 **You know I love them reviews. ;)**

 **\- April**


	11. Chapter 11

A week and a half.

A week and a half had gone by, and August had come to an end and it was now September. Lucy stretched her arms above her head as she stepped onto the train platform with the rest of her team. _It's good to be back_ , she thought.

"Don't forget about that cake, Natsu." Erza shot a threatening look at Natsu as they walked down the platform towards the exit.

"Yes, yes. I know." The Dragon Slayer let out a loud sigh. The only reason they had been gone for the past week and a half was because Natsu had bribed Erza with cake. Specifically, strawberry cake. The scarlet-haired mage was so excited about the cake that she had let Natsu drag them all out of the guild a few hours after he had got back from his solo mission.

The best part was that nothing got destroyed. They had accepted a total of four jobs in Shirotsume, and they were all fairly simple. Somehow, the job that should have been the easiest ended up being the most problematic, mainly because it entailed sorting out an over-stuffed mailroom, but a few letters got burnt or torn up… or turned into a paper plane.

But a few letters aside, nothing got destroyed. Lucy was still trying to get over the shock.

Lucy walked into the guild with Gray, Wendy, and Carla since Erza had dragged Natsu to her favourite cake shop to make sure he got the cake. As soon as they were through the doors, a blue-haired mage flung herself at Gray.

"Gray! Juvia missed you!" She cried as she tightened her grip around Gray as he sent Lucy and Wendy a pleading look.

"Uh… okay…" He tried to push the bluenette off of him, only for her to tighten her grip.

Lucy laughed as she made her way to the bar, leaving Gray with Juvia after Wendy and Carla had gone to sit at a table. The blonde looked around the hall as she made her way there. Macao and Wakaba sat at one table; Gajeel and Levy at another with Jet and Droy hovering close by; Nab was at the request board; and the Connell family sat at another, smiling at their daughter who was shooting at a few cups that had been lined up at the end of a table.

But she realised that the person she had been hoping to see wasn't even there. Neither was the rest of the team or their fearless leader. The blonde sighed quietly as she got closer to the bar, taking a seat before Mira.

"Welcome back, Lucy!" The bright smile that Mira almost always had was infectious, making Lucy smile too as she was greeted by her friend, "Where are Natsu and Erza?"

"Off to get cake."

Mira nodded as she turned to move a stack of plates, "Did you want your usual?" She turned her head over her shoulder to look at the blonde.

"Hm, do you have any of the strawberry tea today?" Mira nodded with another smile as she disappeared into the kitchen, leaving Lucy at the bar alone. She turned on the stool to look around the guild once again. She knew Erza and Natsu wouldn't be back yet because she would have heard them, but as her eyes scanned the hall, she realised that it was emptier than usual. The usual number of countless faces that she hadn't put a name to was significantly lower than normal, making the guild seem quiet.

"Here you go, Lucy." Lucy turned back to face the bar as Mira placed the cup in front of her. She could see the steam rising from the red liquid.

"Thank you, Mira!" The blonde picked up the cup, blowing on it gently to cool it down slightly before taking a sip, smiling slightly as the warm liquid slid down. _It's been a while since I've had this_ , she thought. Lucy placed the cup back down on the saucer gently, "Say, Mira," The white-haired mage turned to look at Lucy, "where is everyone today?"

Mira looked over the guild, "Well, Master is at another meeting, and there's been an abundance of requests coming in the last week." Lucy took another sip of her tea as Mira moved to pick up the large book of all the past requests and teams, "Elfman and Lisanna have gone to… ah! Web Valley; I believe Cana found a fortune telling one for today; Gildarts came in to pick up another S-Class request; Laxus and the Raijinshuu left a few hours ago to deal with some dark guilds that have popped up recently." She closed the large book with a sigh and placed it back under the bar, "Even Nab was gone for a few days. There's just so many people out, but at least it's quiet for a change." She smiled once again as she picked up a tray with large mugs on it before heading over to where Wakaba and Macao were chatting.

 _A few hours ago._

Lucy sighed as she picked up her tea and headed to where Gray sat – somewhat uncomfortably – with Juvia. She didn't even know why she was so bothered about the fact that Bickslow wasn't in the guild. It wasn't like she could talk to him, but she figured it was just the idea of being around him. With a smile, she sat down opposite Gray and told herself to stop worrying. She'd only been on one date, so she figured she shouldn't be missing him _so_ much.

But she did regardless.

* * *

Bickslow sat on the floor with his legs crossed in amongst the now destroyed building; his chin resting in one palm. Evergreen was standing a few paces away as she examined her nails, muttering to herself when she realised she had broken one, while Freed stood next to Laxus near the bar that had a few somewhat electrified people on it.

"Well, that was boring." Bickslow murmured as he looked around at all of the people lying on the floor in unconscious heaps.

"Dark Guilds are so lame and weak." Evergreen put one hand on her hip as she changed her posture, leaning on leg more than the other.

Laxus grunted quietly as all eyes went to him, "Only because they don't know what it means to be in a guild with friends and family."

"Oh, Laxus." Freed clasped his hands together as his eyes started to water while Evergreen just smiled and Bickslow grinned with his tongue hanging out.

The Dragon Slayer turned his head slightly; avoiding the looks they were all giving him, "We should go." He picked his large coat up from where it sat on the floor near the entrance and shook it to get all of the dust and debris off before throwing it over his shoulders and heading out of the ruined building.

Bickslow winced as he pushed himself up from the ground before jogging to catch up to the rest of the team. The bruise on his side had faded considerably in the last week and a half, but it would still hurt when moving occasionally.

"So where to now, Laxus?" Freed asked once Bickslow had caught up, walking behind the other three.

"Spend tonight at an inn, then we'll leave first thing tomorrow." He muttered.

"I'm not sharing a room with Ever again. Last time I saw her with one those weird face mask things she sleeps with sometimes, I had nightmares for a month." The Seith mage grinned as Evergreen turned to shove him.

Laxus sighed as they continued walking through the forest and towards the town, he didn't feel like getting involved with the three of them so he just lifted up the sound-pod headphones and drowned them out until they got back to the town.

* * *

The town was relatively small and unfortunately the only room left in the single inn was a large group room with four beds. Somehow, it seemed to work in their favour since Bickslow didn't want to share with Evergreen; Evergreen didn't want to share with Bickslow; Freed didn't want to share with Evergreen _or_ Bickslow; and Laxus just wanted them all to shut up.

So at least this way, no one really got what they wanted. Well, maybe Laxus, because they managed to stop arguing for a few minutes.

"So, Bicks…" Evergreen moved off of her bed to kneel on the one Bickslow was lounging on, "It's been a while since I've painted your nails. Maybe pink, today?"

The Seith mage rolled off the other side of the bed in a surprisingly graceful manner, "Stay away from me with the pink nail polish!" He held his hands up before him defensively.

"Aw, but Bickslow!" She pouted as he lowered his hands to his side, "I'm sure Lucy will like it!"

Bickslow glared at the woman and the mischievous grin she was now sporting before he climbed back onto his bed, crossing his legs under him as he moved the pillow from behind him, only to have Evergreen steal it once it was within her reach, "Go get your own," he reached out to pull his own pillow back before hugging it tightly, "and shut up." He turned his head slightly as he leant his chin on the pillow.

"Does Elfman let you paint his nails?" Freed moved from his own bed on the other side of the room to sit next to Evergreen.

"What do you think?" She looked down as she painted her own nails.

"Can you both get off my bed?" Bickslow said as he leant back more, resting his back against the wall. _It's getting awfully crowded here_ , he thought.

"No."

"So, did you think of something for your second date?" Freed's gaze lifted from Evergreen's nails.

"This again?" Bickslow sighed, "Didn't you ask me about this a week ago?"

"Exactly. It was a week ago. So, have you?" Evergreen moved closer to Bickslow, only for him to wish he could sink into the wall.

"No…"

"What about dinner again?" Freed asked.

"You can't repeat a date," she turned to Freed as he turned back to her, "maybe a picnic?"

"No… not for a second date. Maybe a show?"

"Perhaps, what about a tour of sorts?"

Bickslow looked between the two as they bounced ideas off of each other for _his_ date, "I'm still here, you know…" _Shouldn't they be talking to_ me _about this, rather than each other?_

"You could always just ask her what she wants to do." Everyone else turned to look at Laxus who seemed bored with the conversation topic yet again.

"That's actually not a bad idea…" Freed and Evergreen shared a look as they thought it over, apparently deeming it suitable. They turned back to Bickslow who stared back with an eyebrow raised in question.

"Huh?" Bickslow stared at the two again, realising that they had basically decided what he should do on his date for him.

Evergreen moved closer to Bickslow once again, "Let her decide what she wants to do. It can be more of a casual date, rather than formal."

"But we still need to find a time for it to happen." Freed held his chin in his hands as Evergreen turned back to him.

The Seith mage reached out to push Evergreen off of his bed, watching as she climbed into her own bed that was next to his as Freed stood to walk to his own on the other side of the room, "How about I just let you two go on the date for me?"

"Don't be silly." The two said at the same time as they both shot a glare at Bickslow.

Laxus groaned as he reached out to switch the lamp next to his bed off, "You guys can decide who gets to go out with Blondie tomorrow." The three stopped arguing and turned to the Dragon Slayer, "We need to leave early in the morning, so can you all just shut up and go to sleep?"

The room sat in silence as the remaining light went out, leaving the room in darkness as they all lay silently in their own beds. Bickslow picked up the spare pillow that sat at the end of his bed and threw it in the general direction of where Evergreen was. He knew he'd hit her when he'd heard the muffled cry and he couldn't stop the laugh that followed. He had been too busy laughing to realise he was lying dangerously close to the edge of the mattress, and he only noticed when he had rolled off and landed on the floor with a loud 'thud' after Evergreen had thrown one back at him as it hit him square in the face.

"Serves you right." She mumbled as turned to her other side.

"Yeah, yeah." Bickslow laughed again as he climbed back into his own bed, making himself comfortable again.

The talk of Lucy had made him realise that he missed her. Bickslow stared up at the dark ceiling, thinking of how he had reached this moment. This moment where he found himself missing the blonde more than ever, and missing being around her. He didn't care that he couldn't talk to her in the guild; it was just knowing that she was there. He couldn't even deny that when he had been alone with her, he had been undoubtedly happy and it had only been a few times.

He rolled to his side with a quiet sigh. _Just a few more days. A few more days and you'll be back and you'll be able to see her again, and you won't miss her anymore._

* * *

 **Well, this chapter was considerably shorter that the others, but that was only because I didn't want to have another date right after the other.**  
 **Anyway, please remember to leave a review!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Wewww. So to make up for Chapter 11 being incredibly short, I give you Chapter 12 which is a little bit longer than the other chapters (7k rather than 5k because I got a little carried away). This is also the last chapter I've written, so I am no longer ahead which could prove to be a problem since this chapter took me wayyyyyy longer than I wanted to (I've been working on it for like 2 weeks or something).**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoy it!**

* * *

Bickslow yawned as he stepped into the guild that morning. Laxus had pushed them all onto the earliest train out of the last stop on the 'Destroy the Dark Guilds Tour' and over four days, they had been over about half of Fiore, and they were exhausted.

Since their last stop had only been one town over (since they had started with the town the farthest away to make their way back), they'd arrived in Magnolia just after 8AM, and since he had no intentions of going to the guild that early, he'd had time to go back to his house and shower.

But staying at his house after that had proved to be boring, and so he found himself in the guild at a little past 9AM. He was shocked to say the least at how empty the guild was in the morning (compared to what it was usually like when he arrived at around noon).

Bickslow sat with the rest of his team. Laxus and Freed sat opposite him while he sat next to Evergreen. The two seemed to be in an argument, but Bickslow wasn't paying much attention to it. He looked around the guild as he rested his chin in his palm. The Strauss siblings were bickering at the bar with Kinana; Gajeel was napping on a bench that was covered in books; Natsu was snoring on another bench while Lucy was laughing with Gray and Wendy. All three of the Exceeds were nowhere to be seen, much like Erza, but that wasn't all that surprising these days.

From where he was sitting, he could look at Lucy without having to turn his head, so it worked out for him. He saw her look towards him and grinned. She was still laughing with her team as she looked over, but her smile got brighter somehow when she had looked over, and that made Bickslow happy. This is what he had missed without even realising it.

"What are you grinning at now?" Laxus looked across the table through narrowed eyes. Seeing that the Seith mage had no intentions of answering (but Laxus believed he already knew the answer), he turned his head slowly to look behind him.

"Hey! Don't turn around!" Bickslow kicked his leg under the table, but he wouldn't have been surprised if it felt more like a light tap to the man. The blonde's head shot back around after he saw Lucy blush and turn away.

"Don't kick me." He mumbled as he shot a look across the table.

Suddenly, Bickslow jumped up from his seat slightly as there was a sharp pain in his hand as he grasped it with his other one. He'd felt that pain too many times before to know what it was, "Don't electrocute me, Sparky!" He was shaking his hand in front of him.

"Be grateful it wasn't your tongue."

Lucy giggled behind her hand as she turned back to Gray who was eyeing her curiously, "What's so funny?"

She shook her head lightly before she picked up her drink, "Laxus electrocuted Bickslow."

"Tch, he probably deserved it."

* * *

Bickslow was drumming his fingers on the table impatiently. He didn't know what you could do at the guild in the mornings. He couldn't drink like he usually did – not that it seemed to stop Wakaba or Macao, but even Bickslow had standards when it came to that. He couldn't go home and sleep since he was already awake, and he couldn't mess around with anyone and cause trouble because there weren't that many people in the guild. He would leave Gajeel alone for a while – until he was sure he wasn't going to get punched in the face again, and he had learned the hard way when it came to messing with Laxus or Evergreen.

So if he couldn't mess around or piss anyone off, what was there to do?

He looked over at Lucy again before he turned to Freed who was arguing with Evergreen still, "Yo, Freed. What's the time?"

The green haired man stopped mid-sentence before pulling a small pocket-watch out from his coat, "10:15AM."

The Seith mage sighed before he turned to look back at the blonde for a second, and then turned to look at where Gajeel was lounging, surrounded by books. He watched as the small script mage came from behind the tower of books, carrying a pile of books that went over her own head. He continued watching as she headed towards the archive on the other side of the guild, waiting until she had disappeared behind the door before he stood and made his way over to Gajeel.

"I need your help." He said as he looked at the Dragon Slayer opposite him.

Gajeel sat up and took a handful of the bolts from the bowl on the table, throwing them into his mouth, "Why should I help you?"

"Because I will do anything you want if you do this."

"… I'm listenin.'" Gajeel leant forward on the table, resting his head in his palm.

"I need you to find a way to get Lucy outside." Bickslow lowered his voice slightly as he stared at Gajeel.

"Why can't you just ask her to go outside yourself?" He took another few bolts from the bowl.

"Because if _I_ go and talk to her, it's going to look weird. Less weird if you do it, or somehow get Levy to do it."

"I'm sure there's other people here that could do that."

"I wouldn't be asking you if there was another way. And besides, I know you're the one who told Lucy I liked her, because she told me. And how did you even find out?" He narrowed his eyes behind his visor as Gajeel smirked.

"Alright, alright." The Dragon Slayer leant back as he folded his arms across his chest, "but you have to do something first. If you do that, I'll help you. And you'll still owe me a favour." The smirk turned into a wicked grin as he waited for the Seith mage's response.

Bickslow eyes remained narrowed under his visor. It was proving to be troublesome just to talk to the blonde, but… he figured it was worth it. Surely whatever Gajeel was planning wasn't going to be that bad, right?

"Fine. What do I have to do?"

"Go and kiss Bunny Girl." His grin widened as Bickslow's jaw dropped slightly.

"Are you fucking insane?" _Why would he say something like that? Of all things he could make me do, this was definitely up there on the list of things that sucked._

"Gi-hi. Is that goin' to be a problem, Soul Boy?"

Bickslow grit his teeth slightly, "Yes."

"Looks like you don't need my help, then."

Bickslow stood up from the table as he looked around the room once again. He couldn't get Laxus, Freed, or Evergreen to do it for him, since they didn't really talk to the blonde. He couldn't get Levy without explaining it to her, and anyone else involved him explaining it. And that was something he didn't want to do.

Kissing Lucy was no problem for him – _that_ much he knew – it was just doing so in the guild. That was the problem. Mira was still at the bar, and just when she had finally stopped giving the man weird looks, he was going to make his life even worse. Natsu was still asleep, so that was a good thing. He wasn't entirely sure what his reaction would be.

"You better come up with a good reason." He said as he glared at the Dragon Slayer once again who nodded as he ate another handful of bolts.

He shook his head as he made his way over to where she sat. _I can't believe I'm doing this._

Lucy looked up as she saw Bickslow walking towards the table, and her eyebrows rose as she realised that he was actually coming towards her table, not just walking past it.

"Cosplayer." He came to a stop next to the blonde as Wendy and Gray looked up at him.

"Bicks-?" She was interrupted as he leant over the table, taking her face in his hands and pressing his lips against hers in one surprisingly swift motion.

 _1… 2… 3… not too long, or it's going to be too weird and you can't explain that._ He pulled away and stood up straight again, grinning as his tongue rolled from his mouth. Everyone in the guild seemed to be picking their jaws up from where they sat at the ground, and he realised that it was impossibly quiet, and he wondered if he had maybe kissed her a little longer than he should of. He looked around slowly; Mira had her hands over her mouth, much like Evergreen. Laxus looked more shocked than Freed, and Gajeel was smirking.

He cleared his throat, raising an arm and pointing at the smirking man, "Pay up, bitch!" _At least this way it seemed more like a dare or something… right?_ He just wanted that awkward silence in the room to and, and it was the only thing that came to mind at the time.

Gajeel stood up quickly, knocking over a few piles of books on the table as he moved it slightly, "The hell?!"

"You can have it back later," Bickslow whispered as he got back to the table. Gajeel scoffed as he reached into his pocket, pulling out a random Jewel note and shoving it in the outstretched hand, "now do your part."

Gajeel watched as the Seith mage walked out of the main doors while everyone went back to their business and the noise level rose slowly. He decided he'd wait a while before thinking of an excuse to get the blonde outside, and it was going to be fun to make Bickslow wait.

The Dragon Slayer stood to start picking up the scattered books on the floor, piling them all up on the table again when the bluenette had come up to the table, "Gajeel! They're not in order anymore!" He shrugged as he sat back down, grabbing another handful of the bolts, muttering about books under his breath.

"What the hell was that?" Gray had asked once the guild had gone back to normal.

Lucy shook her head. She could feel the heat on her cheeks, and she knew she was probably the colour of Erza's hair. "How am I supposed to know?" Because she really had no clue what that was. He wouldn't even talk to her in the guild unless she was around someone else, but he had kissed her, and then acted like it was part of a game. "Can we just not talk about it anymore?" She took a sip of her juice, making a mental note to ask Bickslow about that another time.

* * *

About half an hour had passed since Bickslow had walked out of the guild. Gajeel figured enough time had passed, and he was getting annoyed with Levy's fan boys who were sitting behind them sniggering since Levy had lectured him on the correct ways to organise books. He'd had enough time to think of a way to get her out of the guild, so he just had to put that plan into action.

He stood from the bench carefully, actually making sure not to knock over any of the neat piles of books, and made his way over to where the blonde sat.

"Oi, Bunny Girl. I need your help." He stood at the end of the table with his arms crossed.

The blonde looked up, "O-okay? What can I do?" _Why on earth does he need my help?_

"I need one of your spirits for somethin.'" He turned to head towards the doors before looking back over his shoulder, "So you goin' to help or not?"

Lucy looked towards Gray who just shrugged before she raised herself from the bench, "Sure." She said with a smile before she followed him out of the guild.

Gajeel stopped just outside the doors, looking around the outdoor café for the Seith mage. He spotted him leaning his back against the edge of the table while his elbows rested on it.

"I thought you said you needed help with something?" Lucy asked when she realised that they were not actually leaving the guild and were instead walking towards the far side of the outdoor café.

Bickslow turned his head at the sound of her voice and saw the confused look on the blonde's face before he saw the smirk on Gajeel's. He stood up as they got closer and picked up the Jewel note that was sitting on the table.

"Took you long enough." He mumbled as he handed the money over.

"You never said when." Gajeel grinned as he put the money back in his pocket and turned around, heading towards the gates.

Lucy looked between the two, still trying to figure out what exactly was going on, "Did you even need my help at all?" She called out to the Dragon Slayer.

"Nope." He had said with another grin as he walked with his hands in his pockets and through the gates.

The blonde turned back to face Bickslow who still seemed to be staring at the gates. She reached out to shove him slightly, "What the hell was that about?"

Bickslow sat down on the bench again, "Uh... I wanted to talk to you, and I couldn't really do that in the guild."

"That didn't seem to stop you doing something else."

"Hey, I didn't want to have to do that, but that was part of the deal."

"Yeah, sure." She laughed softly before she turned her head slightly and bit her lip, "I-I missed you, you know? Is that weird?"

He looked around the area quickly, making sure that there wasn't anyone nearby or looking in their direction before he lifted an arm to wrap it around her shoulders, pulling her in to his side. "If that's weird, then I'm weird."

They sat quietly for a few minutes, just enjoying each other's company. Lucy knew she shouldn't have missed Bickslow that much that early, but she didn't care all that much. She liked him, and she liked being around him, and he had missed her too, so that's all that mattered.

"Let's go do something." Bickslow said quietly as he lifted his arm and brought it back down to his side.

Lucy looked up, "Like what?"

"I don't know. Just something. Let's go somewhere."

"What about everyone else? In the guild?" She raised her eyebrows, wondering where it had come from all of a sudden.

"Fuck 'em," Bickslow grinned as he stood up, pulling the blonde to her feet with him, "and I believe I owe you another date, anyway."

Lucy nodded, blushing slightly, not that she entirely knew why she was still feeling slightly nervous.

The two started walking down the main street in Magnolia. At some point, their fingers had intertwined on their walk, but neither had paid much attention to it, acting like it was one of the most natural things in the world. Lucy's arm was bent slightly at the elbow due to the height difference which she was beginning to dislike.

She turned her head to the side and looked up at Bickslow, "So, what are we going to do?"

"Whatever you want to do." He'd had Evergreen and Freed on him for the last three days, constantly reminding him that he would have to ask her what she wanted to, and to make it 'fun' and 'casual' and 'light'. And he was going to and try and do just that. Fun he could do, he knew that much.

"Really?"

"Yes, really. Anything you plan, I'll take it like a man." He grinned as he turned to look at her again as she laughed softly.

"You've been hanging around Elfman too much."

"I have not." He rolled his eyes under his visor, "That guy is constantly going on about manliness, and he's not even a man. He's a freakin' beast." _Probably why all of his take-overs are beast souls_ , he thought.

"… Anyway," she laughed again, "let's just head towards the markets or something."

"Fine by me." They turned down a street to start heading towards the market area before Bickslow turned to look at Lucy again, "so what exactly have you been up to in the last two weeks?"

Lucy sighed, "Nothing much. We spent a week and a half in Shirotsume doing a few small and menial jobs, and then I was just around the guild for the last few days. What about you? I heard you were dealing with some of the dark guilds?" She looked up again.

Bickslow nodded, "Ah, yes. It makes me wonder how they can call themselves guilds at all. I spent more time giving Ever hell than anything. Can you keep a secret?" He looked down with a wide grin as the blonde raised an eyebrow, "Laxus occasionally lets Ever paint his nails. Mostly yellow, for whatever reason."

"Laxus? Really?" He nodded again, "Wow… that's… not what I expected." She looked down at their entangled hands before she brought them up to look at them, noticing that he had gone back to the black polish that he occasionally donned, "and can you really talk? I mean… why do _you_ paint your nails?" She gestured to his nails again.

"Some things are best left unanswered."

* * *

They walked through the markets area, stopping to look at each small store and observe the small trinkets they each sold. Lucy had bought a punnet of strawberries at some point, and Bickslow really had no idea when that had happened.

Suddenly, the blonde had run off into a bookstore and Bickslow silently followed. To anyone else, he'd seem like he was bored or at least disinterested, but he wasn't. The truth was that being around Lucy made him happy, because he really did like her. But at the same time, he was nervous. He had said he owed her a date, and so he was treating the day like a fun, casual date. Freed and Evergreen had only told him what to do – or what not to do – but they never mentioned what he should say – or not say – or talk about.

It ultimately came down to the fact that Bickslow felt he needed to live up to some sort of expectations if he wanted to continue going on dates with her.

"So I take it you like books?" He asked as he followed her around the room, watching as her finger trailed along the books on one of the shelves.

"Mm-hmm."

Lucy made her way over to where the magazines and various event flyers sat, picking up a few random booklets from the rack before she spotted one at the top frowning when she realised it was just out of her reach. _Why would they make the display so tall?! No one can even reach that!_

Nevertheless, she stood on her tiptoes and reached her arm up and tried to get it. Bickslow stood behind her smirking, deciding to wait a few seconds before he lifted his own arm up to pick up the one she had been reaching for.

Lucy blushed as he handed her the flyer before she looked down at it to open it up. It was an advertisement for the new exhibition at the museum. She held it up to Bickslow, "Want to go to this?"

"A museum?" _A museum. Of all things, it was going to be a museum. I hate museums._ "Sure. But food first."

"Right. So where do you want to go?" She asked as she folded up the flyer and placed it into the small bag on her side.

"Well…" They walked out of the small store and back onto the busy street of the market area. Bickslow folded his arms across his chest again, looking down the street that had every second store as a café or something similar.

* * *

The two ended up at a small café on a corner. From where they sat against the window, they could see the fountain that was in the centre of the square. The trees and benches surrounding the area made it rather nice, which was a change from the loud, bustling streets that ran off each side and made up the market area.

They decided on a lighter lunch, with Lucy eating a fruit salad while Bickslow had what resembled fried rice, but with more 'healthy' ingredients. When she had asked what it was, he had shrugged in between mouthfuls, explaining that he had just pointed to a random thing on the menu and that it was pretty good.

"So," she placed the fork on the napkin and moved the empty bowl aside, "you said you were going to tell me the names of your beloved babies last time."

"Oh, yeah. Later." He took the last spoonful from his bowl, "Not in here."

"Alright, fine." She leant on her elbows with her chin between her hands, staring across the table at Bickslow. His visor covered half of his face as usual, so it was hard to tell what he was thinking or feeling half of the time, but she noticed the slight smirk on his lips which reminded her of another question she had yet to ask, "Why did you get the guild mark on your tongue of all places?"

His smirk changed to his usual grin, one that showcased the guild mark in question, "Because, why not?"

Lucy narrowed her eyes slightly as she continued staring across the table as Bickslow leant back in the chair, folding his arms.

"Not gonna take that answer, huh?" She shook her head slightly, "Didn't think you would." Bickslow sighed quietly, "It basically just came down to the habit I have for sticking my tongue out whenever I talk or whatever, and not being able to decide where I wanted to have the mark anyway, so I was basically just like, 'you know what? Fuck it.'" It was mostly the truth. Bickslow failed to mention Laxus' involvement, but he had learned not to spill smaller details like how the guy had told him to get it on his tongue when he couldn't decide. Things like that weren't helping with the whole 'the Raijinshuu are all in love with Laxus, that's why they follow him everywhere' theory, when it was really just Freed who was in love with him (as much as he tried to hide it).

Just then, the waitress came up and placed the small book with the bill on the table before she picked up the empty bowls and glasses and walked away once again. Lucy reached out to pick it up, only to have it snatched away before she could reach it, "Hey!" She said with a frown.

"Don't even try, Cosplayer." Bickslow shook his head as he opened up the small book.

"You don't have to, you know…"

"I want to." He stood up as he placed the book back down on their table, "We should probably go. What time does that tour thing start?"

"I think it said 1PM."

Bickslow glanced at the clock above the door, seeing that it read 12:40PM, "Yeah, definitely time to leave."

* * *

"So are you going to tell me their names now?" She asked as they walked down one of the quieter streets of Magnolia.

Bickslow stopped walking and stared straight ahead. _Why the hell do I keep forgetting about that?_

"Something wrong?"

He blinked, "Huh?"

"You stopped suddenly…"

"Oh, right. No, no. Nothing's wrong. I was just thinking about something." He brought a hand up slightly, balling it up into a fist as his palm started to glow with a white light. The dolls seemingly dropped from the sky to hover around him. "Cosplayer, babies. Babies, Cosplayer." He grinned as they went to spin around her head again, watching as she curiously observed them.

"Cosplayer, Cosplayer!" They chanted.

"Anyway – names." He looked up at the dolls that had gone to hover around her, rather than himself. Bickslow pointed to the one with the angry expression as it moved to hover in front of the blonde, "That one is Pippi," he pointed to the next one as it went to replace Pippi, "That's Poppo."

"I'm sensing a pattern here." She mused.

Bickslow nodded as they continued shuffling around in the air, "The happy one is Pappa. And then those two are Peppe and Puppu."

Lucy looked up at the small totemic dolls floating above her. She had always been curious about them, since in a way they reminded her of her spirits that she held so dear. She had noticed their strange habit of repeating the end of phrases, but she realised she didn't know all that much about them.

"So these are all souls, right?"

He nodded as he looked down at her, watching her observe them with interest.

"So… how do you like… you know… _get_ them?" Lucy blushed as she turned her head away slightly.

"You mean, how I managed to get them under my manipulation?" He continued watching her. Very few people seemed to show an interest in his magic, especially after they found out that part of it allowed him to control living humans. He was aware that some called it 'creepy', and he had thought the same for a while. But it was something that he grew up with, so it came to a point where he needed to just get over it and embrace it.

But here she was wanting to know more about his magic, and she didn't seem put off by it in the slightest. Bickslow remembered the question, and he had to stop and think about it for a second. It had been an incredibly long time since someone had asked anything similar, and even then he hadn't been able to answer it completely.

"Uh… it's kind of a hard question, I guess. Seith magic allows me to seal wandering souls into objects, so each of those ones above your head are wandering souls that I can control. To an extent. No matter what I do, they seem to have a mind of their own sometimes." He paused again, realising he hadn't really answered the question. _Damn it, why did she have to ask such a difficult question?_ "But if you're asking how they came to be as part of my immortal troop of dolls, then… I don't really know. Came across a soul, picked it up and put it in something else. It's been a while since I've come across one so I can't really remember, but I'm really just a glorified puppeteer."

"Puppeteer!" A few of them chanted.

Which was the truth, mostly. Wandering souls that were able to be manipulated were incredibly rare, and the last one he had obtained was when he had technically still been a teenager, so he really couldn't remember the details. He had five of them under his control, and he had been fine with five so he found no need to go and seek out a sixth, but again, he would have been incredibly lucky to find a sixth.

"So… you're saying that you're essentially a glorified puppeteer with an immortal army?" She turned to look up at Bickslow with a smile.

"Exactly." Bickslow laughed loudly as he grinned, ignoring the questioning looks the people on the street were giving him, apparently confused about the sudden noise from the man. The Seith mage was used to the occasionally stares he got, but he didn't care. That's usually what happened when you acted the way that Bickslow did. Between the laughing; the magic; and the armour, they had plenty to gawk at. Not to mention the whole tongue thing.

But that's just the way he was. He wasn't going to change it for anyone, because he didn't care what anyone thought about him. Except for Lucy, that is, but she didn't seem to care too much and that's all that mattered. She was there because she didn't care what anyone else thought, because she liked Bickslow for Bickslow – or so he could hope – and that made him happy.

"Right, so now that we've established I'm the commander of an immortal army, what exactly is this exhibition thing anyway?" He'd asked once the museum was in sight.

"It's a travelling exhibition apparently. The booklet said it was a large showcase of ancient artefacts from Fiore and the surrounding countries. It just seems like a good way to waste the afternoon, don't you think?" She looked up at Bickslow as they started walking up the steps to the museum.

He shrugged, "I guess so." Bickslow really was not looking forward to it. He hated museums with a passion. They were boring, and he didn't do boring. But he had agreed to it, so he was going to be a man about and stick with it.

* * *

"And here we have a marble statue of…"

Bickslow rolled his eyes under his visor as the monotonous voice of the museum guide started rattling off about yet another marble statue. He had been counting them, and in that hall alone, he was already up to twenty-seven. Twenty-seven statues of old guys with wicked beards that all looked the same in their stupid togas.

He felt like he had been following around that group for a year – when it was really just three hours – and he had hated every second of it. Three hours of following around a group of children and elderly couples who have nothing better to do with their life. If his headache wasn't from the screaming kids, it was from the voice that just went on and on about whatever they were supposed to be looking at; whether it be a statue, a painting, a mast from an old ship; or a piece of a broken bowl.

It was boring, and Bickslow was bored out of his mind.

But he had Lucy next to him, and he had told himself to not act like the 'manchild' he usually was and act like he was at least a little bit interested, but that plan had proved to be harder than he'd expected after the first fifteen minutes of listening to the museum employee prattle on about some disturbing past he hadn't paid much attention to.

Lucy had almost sighed in relief when the tour guide had exclaimed the tour was officially over as the group disbanded and headed in separate directions. Now, she wasn't the _biggest_ fan of museums or anything of the sort, but that's not to say she didn't enjoy them because she did find the historical aspect of them interesting occasionally, but she had found that exhibition incredibly dull and boring, which was a little surprising to her.

Lucy wasn't stupid, either, and she knew that Bickslow wasn't enjoying it and he had made that quite obvious when he had yawned quite loudly at one point and been shushed by everyone else on the tour, and he hadn't made a single noise after that. Lucy wasn't all that surprised that he'd found it boring, because she'd had a feeling he wouldn't enjoy going to a museum. Bickslow just didn't seem like the kind of guy who spent his free time going to exhibitions, and Lucy was right in assuming so.

Nevertheless, she was still a little proud of him for putting up with it for a full three hours.

They made their way out of the building quietly and onto another bustling street in Magnolia. "So…" Lucy said quietly, "What did you think?"

"What did I think?" She nodded as he looked down, thinking about how to answer it. _Oh, well… I'm pretty sure I fell asleep while standing a few times, and I have a headache from all of those screaming demons, so what did I think? I thought it was fucking terrible. No… you can't say that,_ "It was alright." He said with a shrug.

"Well, I thought it was quite boring."

He stopped suddenly as he stared at the blonde, "Huh?" Was all he could manage. _She thought it was boring? Doesn't she usually like that kind of stuff? What?!_ And then Bickslow saw the smile she was trying hard to contain, and when it finally broke out into a grin and she couldn't supress the giggle that came with it, he couldn't stop his own wide grin. What could he say? Her smile was contagious.

"You knew, didn't you?" He asked as they began walking again.

"Yup. Figured it out when you yawned and got told to shut up by a bunch of 10 year-olds."

Bickslow shook his head. _That's why she asked_ , he thought. _She knew the entire time._ "Yeah… well, sorry. I didn't really want you to know, but obviously that didn't work at all."

"You should have told me," She murmured, "We could have done something else instead…" Lucy trailed off into silence as she stared at the stones that made up the street. She felt bed for making Bickslow do something he clearly didn't like, even though he had put up with it without a single complaint.

Bickslow stopped them again as he placed his hands on Lucy's shoulders, turning her so she was facing him, "Hey," He said quietly as she still looked at the ground, "It doesn't matter, okay?"

"Yes it does. If you didn't like it we could have done someth-"

"It doesn't matter because I got to the spend the afternoon with you which is what I wanted to do in the first place. I didn't say anything because I really didn't care all that much."

"I…" Lucy didn't know what to say. He'd kept quiet because he just wanted to spend time with her, and that was surprisingly sweet, considering it was Bickslow who had said it. But on the other hand, he had proved to be full of surprises when it came to being nice and unexpectedly caring, and it was a side of Bickslow that Lucy didn't even think existed, and she was still trying to figure it all out. "I still think you should have told me." She finally said quietly.

Without thinking, Bickslow wrapped his arms around her back to pull her in against his chest. He felt terrible. He hadn't meant to make her upset over something so small and trivial, but he had. Bickslow thought he was doing the right thing by not telling her that he hated it, but apparently he had been wrong. He seemed to have done more harm by not telling her.

"I'm sorry." He admitted as he moved his head down and forward so his chin was resting on the blonde's head, "I promise to tell you when I'm bored out of my fucking mind."

Lucy smiled into his chest as her own arms moved to lace around his waist before she clasped her hands together behind his back. A part of her felt like she could have stayed like that for hours. It was comforting and somehow made her feel like everything in the world was going to fine, even though she knew she had no reason to think otherwise and that confused her.

It was warm and she was content just standing there for a bit. Something about it was different though, and she couldn't quite put her finger on what was so different about it. It was warm, but not overly warm like Natsu's that made her feel like she was on fire. It wasn't exceedingly tight like Erza's occasionally were and Lucy would end up with a headache from getting her head slammed against her armour. It wasn't the kind of hug she'd get from Gray that would be weak just in case a certain blue-haired mage was lurking, and it wasn't the kind she'd get from Levy just because she hadn't seen her best friend for a few days.

It was something else entirely, but she decided that it's what a hug _should_ be. It was at that moment Lucy realised why it was so different and that's because it wasn't from Natsu or Erza or Gray or Levy. It was from Bickslow. It was different because he cared about her and _for_ her. It was different because he was sorry, and that's what he was conveying to her through holding her like that. Lucy realised that he had wanted her to know that he cared.

She felt almost silly now. She had gotten upset over something small and relatively meaningless, but regardless, she really wished Bickslow had told her. Lucy had so far enjoyed the time that they had spent together, and she really did want to spend more time with Bickslow. She was enjoying learning about him, and despite getting slightly upset over the entire museum situation, she realised it was okay. You were supposed to learn about people when you go on dates with them, and she had learned something from it.

"You better." She mumbled into his chest with a slight giggle before she pulled away slightly, "Come on, we should probably be getting back to the guild now."

"I guess. Your team is probably wondering where you disappeared to."

"They think I'm helping Gajeel with something… well, they should be thinking that." She mumbled as they began walking again.

"Yeah, but he'll be back in the guild by now."

She looked up at him, "How do you know?"

"Because he's always there," Bickslow shrugged, "and besides, he didn't take Lily with him when he left, so he had no intentions of going out for very long."

 _That's right… he wasn't with Lily when he'd left…_

The walk back to the guild was filled with laughter as they discussed what they hadn't liked about the exhibition. Bickslow had stuck with saying he hated it all while reiterating the fact he only liked it because Lucy was there, but they did manage to agree that the tour guide was most likely one of the worst parts of it.

As they crossed the main gate and into the courtyard, they slowed down. Lucy looked up as they walked to the one side of the area that was mostly hidden from sight should anyone decide to burst out of guild doors.

"So…" Lucy said quietly as she blushed. She was basically about to ask him for another date, and she'd never done that in her entire life. _How do you even ask someone to go on a date? Would it even really be a date? Oh God, Lucy, you're too nervous. What if you mess up the words?_

"So…" He echoed as he turned to lean his back against a wall before he folded his arms across his chest.

"Are you going to be here Saturday?" She asked a little too quickly, making it a slightly slurred mess.

He grinned slightly, "That depends on what you say next." Bickslow had an inkling as to what she was trying to say, but for some reason he didn't feel like making it easy for her, so he decided to have a bit of fun with it. _Hopefully she'd still get around to asking, if that's what she was going to talk about anyway…_

 _What does that mean? Does that mean he's going to be in the guild on Saturday? Or does it mean he'll be out with his team by then? Why couldn't he just give a simple answer?!_ "Uh… well, if you'll have to change things around then it can wait, I guess…" She trailed off as she looked at the ground awkwardly. _This is too awkward. How did he manage to do it so easily after the first date?_

"I'll be here."

She looked up, giving him an unamused look as his grin widened, "You couldn't have just said that?"

"Nope. So?" _Ah, she's adorable when she's nervous_ , he thought. _Not so much when she looks like she's ready to send you through a hall. Still adorable nonetheless._

"So… I was thinking maybe you could come over for dinner…" Lucy felt her face heating up so she looked to the ground again, "I mean… I could cook…"

"What time?"

She looked up to meet his grin, "O-oh…" Lucy realised she had half been expecting him to say no for some reason, but as she thought about it, she knew that that made no sense. He'd put up with a three hour museum tour just because he wanted to do something with her, so why would he say no to dinner? They'd already done that before… _Oh, God. This is hard, she thought,_ "Maybe around 7pm?" She said quietly.

"Sure," Bickslow pushed his back from the wall, "So I guess I'll see you inside?" He said over his shoulder as he took a few steps towards the doors.

Lucy remained standing where she had been before. She nodded, "Yeah, I guess."

He had almost got to the door before he turned around to face the blonde who was still standing there, now staring down at the ground, "One other thing…"

"Hm?"

"This." He murmured before he grinned briefly. Bickslow raised his take her face in his hands, gently lifting her face up as he brought his own down and tilting his head slightly before pressing his lips to hers as gently as he always did. His hands dropped down to sit just below her waist as her own came to rest in a similar position. Bickslow had to remind himself to not draw it out, as much as he wanted to.

Lucy's hands dropped back to her own sides as Bickslow turned his head away slightly, breaking the kiss, "You're adorable when you get shy, Lucy." He whispered into her ear, sending a slight shiver down her spine when she could feel his breath against her ear.

And then he had dropped his hands, turned, and sauntered off towards the doors, presumably with that wide grin he was known for, leaving Lucy standing there once again.

She stood watching the empty space where he had just been. _How does he do it?_ She thought. _How can he just always be so… confident? And how could he do_ that _?!_ Lucy didn't even register the fact that Bickslow had used her actual name rather than 'Cosplayer', but when she did, she completely froze.

 _That was the first time he's ever said my name on purpose._

* * *

 **I don't know, I don't know.**

 **Hopefully I'll have Chapter 13 ready for next week, but who knows now.**

 **Please remember to review!**

 **\- April**


	13. Chapter 13

**Another shorter chapter, but the shorter ones I can get out quicker so it works out.**

 **On another note - I managed to write two chapters for two different stories today, so my brain has completely checked out by this point, honestly. I'm honestly surprised I didn't manage to include Ingrid anywhere in _this_ chapter. **

**Anyway - thank you so much for the reviews on the last chapter/s. As always, they mean the absolute world to me.**

 **I hope there's not too many errors in this. It's late (well, it's like 11pm but like I said, I've done too much writing today and I can't do any more), and I can't proof-read this again. Knowing me, I'll probably read it on my phone as I lay in bed and I'll come across a million errors.**

 **Moving on, I hope it's okay and you enjoy it!**

* * *

"Where the fuck did you disappear to? And what the hell was that spectacle before that made the demon pass out?" Laxus demanded as he took a sip from the mug.

"Uh… out, I guess?" Bickslow replied as he took a seat opposite the blonde man, taking a sip from his own mug as he did so, "And Mira passed out from that?"

"Yeah, and then she went on and on about how you two make a cute couple." Evergreen chimed in when she took a seat next to Bickslow, "Oh, and then Elfman said it wasn't very manly."

"Of course he did…"

"Uh… slight problem," Freed said warily as he looked at something behind Bickslow and Evergreen, "A couple members of Team Natsu are heading this way…"

Bickslow turned his head over his shoulder and sure enough, the namesake of the team and Titania were heading his way and they looked just about ready to send him to an early grave. _Who the fuck told those two?!_

He picked up his mug and took a very large gulp before looking up at Natsu and Erza who now stood at the end of the table. _What's that saying about liquid courage?_ "What's up?" He asked with a grin.

"How dare you steal Lucy's first kiss like that!" Erza yelled as she held a sword to Bickslow's throat.

 _Woah, where the fuck did that sword come fr- nevermind; it's Erza._

He looked at the dangerously sharp edge of the sword that he could just feel touching the fabric of the hood before he looked up at the threatening look Erza was giving him. His throat suddenly felt dry as he licked his lips, his grin faltering. _So much for liquid courage,_ he thought. One wrong word, and he'd very likely become a human kebab. Natsu would most likely be the one to do the grilling if that became the case.

"I uh… huh?" He replied. _Wait, what? What was that about stealing a kiss?_ "Really? Cosplayer had never been kissed?" Well… she had been before that… also by him.

Erza shook her head as she withdrew the sword some, "No, _Lucy_ had not."

"Well, at least her first kiss was good th- alright, alright…" He held his hands up in surrender as Erza pressed the sword against his throat again. Apparently no jokes were allowed.

"Right," Freed cleared his throat, "It won't happen again, will it, Bickslow?"

Bickslow noticed the look that Freed was giving him from across the table. _Thank God for Freed._ He shook his head before he looked to Erza and Natsu, "Nope, never again."

"Good." Erza said as her scowl lessened, withdrawing her sword once again. "Apologise to Lucy."

"Will do."

"Today."

"Yup." He nodded as he reached for the mug again, taking yet another large gulp as Erza turned and headed towards her table where Lucy sat with her head on the bench.

Natsu was still standing at the end of Bickslow's table with his arms folded, "Natsu?" Bickslow raised his eyebrows, wondering what the Dragon Slayer was still doing there. Natsu leaned in so close that Bickslow could feel the heat radiating from him, instantly making him sweat under all of his clothing. _Damn, did it just go up 30 degrees?_

"Don't underestimate a dragon's nose." He said in a low voice that sent a shiver up Bickslow's spine.

And then Natsu turned and headed towards his own table with his arms folded behind his head.

"Well then… I didn't see that coming." Laxus muttered as he picked up his mug, "But really, did you _have_ to choose the girl with the craziest team?"

Bickslow was still too shocked to respond. One, he was still trying to figure out how Erza and Natsu had known since Erza wasn't in the building and Natsu had been asleep. Two, what the hell was that that Natsu had just said?!

On the other side of the room, Lucy looked up from the table as Erza and Natsu sat down. "You guys, you didn't have to do that…" She sighed as she rested her chin on her folded arms.

"Nonsense," Erza replied matter-of-factly, "One's first kiss should be meaningful; not with someone you barely know as part of a game."

"It's fine, really." And it was fine, because it wasn't actually her first kiss – not that they knew that, of course. It was fine because she really did like Bickslow.

"He should apologise by tonight," Erza said as she sipped at her tea, "If he doesn't, then he will know just how sharp my swords are." A devilish glint shone in her eyes as Gray leaned away slightly and looked at Natsu across the table.

"Natsu? You okay?" He asked. He looked like he was thinking. Thinking! Of all things, that was not one that Natsu did very often.

Natsu looked up from the burn mark he was looking at on the table, "Huh? Oh… yeah," He mumbled as he looked down again, "Just thinking about something."

 _Why did Bickslow smell so much like Lucy?_

"Who are you and what have you done with Natsu?"

"Ha-ha. Very funny, Popsicle." Natsu said, rolling his eyes.

"Oi. What was that, Human Clothes Dryer?"

Lucy rolled her eyes as her head dropped down to the table again, blocking out the two of them who had entered yet another round of insulting each other.

* * *

Bickslow had left the guild for the night. He stared at the cobblestone that made up the path, playing back a certain something that someone had said.

 _'Don't underestimate a dragon's nose.'_

 _What the hell was that supposed to mean?_

And then he remembered what Laxus had said after he'd let Lucy wear his cloak for that job a few weeks back. _Strawberries_. As the realisation struck, he brought an edge of his cloak up to his nose. _Nope, not strawberries._

So if he didn't smell like strawberries, then what the hell was Natsu tal-

His thoughts were cut short as he suddenly found himself on his back on the cold path and staring up at the scarlet-haired mage who was pointing yet another sword at his throat.

"Forgetting something?" She asked with mock politeness. The whole sword-at-throat thing wasn't helping. She was fucking terrifying.

Bickslow swallowed as a hand reached out to grab the sword as lightly as he could. Despite that, he could feel the edge cutting into his hand as he pushed it away from his throat. "Uh… probably?" _One wrong word and you're dead. You know that, Bicks._

Erza moved so Bickslow was free to stand up, "You owe Lucy an apology."

"Oh… that. Right, yeah. Forgot about that…" He mumbled as he looked at his hand. The thin cut that was already dripping blood down into his gauntlet on that arm. That was the second time Lucy had indirectly been the cause of his injury. Well, the whole incident with Gajeel had been caused by his own stupidity, but he got distracted by the blonde. That had to count for something, right? Now he had cut himself on Erza's blade over kissing her in the guild. And then he realised that Gajeel had something to do with both of those incidents…

 _No, no. It's not Lucy's fault for that. Both were from my own stupidity. And Gajeel. It's all Gajeel's fault._

"Come on. Lucy's house is just down here. You can apologise now."

 _Yeah… I know where she lives._ "If I must…" He muttered as he followed the Requip Mage down the dark street.

* * *

Erza knocked on Lucy's door and the blonde pulled the door open only a moment later.

"Erza?" Lucy blinked as she stared at the red-haired woman before her, "What can I- Bickslow?" She looked towards the figure that moved from where he leant on the wall and into view.

"Cosplayer." Bickslow grinned.

"Apologise. _Now_." Erza said as she turned to glare at Bickslow.

He rolled his eyes from where he stood leaning against the doorframe, looking at his hand that was still bleeding, surprisingly. "Fine," Bickslow turned his head to look at Lucy who stood in the doorway, apparently still confused by everything, "I'm sorry for stealing your first kiss like that. Maybe I should steal your sec- will you stop with the swords already?!" He shouted as he backed into the wall again.

" _Bickslow_." She narrowed her eyes at the Seith mage.

"Okay… I'm sorry, jeez…" His hands went up in surrender once again before he lowered them to push the sword away from his throat yet again. "Damn it," He hissed when his already injured hand began stinging again, the blade pushing deeper into the cut that was already there. _That was a bad idea_ , he told himself.

Lucy finally blinked as Erza sent her sword of choice back to her magic space, nodding in approval to herself before turning back to Lucy who was still standing dumbstruck in the doorway, "I apologise for stopping by so late, Lucy."

"I-it's fine, really," Lucy looked towards Bickslow who was holding his bloodied hand up; the occasional drop falling to the floor, "You need a bandage for that…"

"I'm fine," Bickslow muttered to himself before looking to Erza, "Can I go now?"

"No, you can't." Lucy cut in before Erza could speak, "I have some bandages here, just come inside." She turned and disappeared inside the apartment.

Erza sighed as she shook her head, her hand extending out to grasp Bickslow's arm as he moved off the wall and towards the open door, stopping him in his tracks, "Stay out here."

"O-kay…" _Not that it matters since I'm going to be coming back on Saturday night…_

Lucy returned a few moments later carrying a small basket. She looked at the two with an eyebrow raised, "Not coming in…?"

Bickslow shook his head as Erza glared at him before she turned to face Lucy with a smile, "You're too kind, Lucy."

"It's nothing." Lucy looked around the hall for a moment before her eyes focused on the stairs railing, "Can you sit on the railing?" She asked as she turned to face Bickslow.

Bickslow moved to sit on the railing that separated the stairwell and the landing; his feet hanging a few inches from the ground. Lucy placed the small basket on the railing just next to him as she picked up a small towel.

"Hand." She said simply and he raised his hand, her wrist reaching out to hold his own as she pulled his hand closer.

Erza unfolded her arms as she took a step towards Lucy, "It's late, so I should be heading home myself. Are you okay here?"

Lucy nodded as she brushed the wet towel across his hand; the fluffy white fabric suddenly becoming tinged with red and pink, "I'm good."

"Are you sure?" Erza eyed Bickslow curiously who was still too busy looking down at his own hand.

"Yes, Erza," The blonde rolled her eyes as Bickslow flinched, the towel pressing into the cut, "If he tries anything, I'll scream loud enough for you to hear and let you turn Bickslow into a human target."

"Can I object to that?" He interjected. _Damn, Cosplayer's cold._

The Requip mage headed towards the top of the stairs as she nodded, apparently happy with Bickslow becoming a human dummy if he were to do anything, "Right. Well, good night." She waved as she headed down the stairs.

Bickslow looked over his shoulder, waiting for the red hair to disappear out of sight and preferably out of the building.

"I tried to stop them in the guild earlier." Lucy said quietly as she continued cleaning his hand with the now mostly red towel, "They didn't listen, of course."

He flinched again as she pressed into the cut again, "It's alright. That hurts, Cosplayer."

"I'm sorry."

The only sound in the room after a while was the sound of the second hand ticking on the clock above the stairs. Lucy would lift up the towel she had pressed to Bickslow's hand every minute or so, checking to see if the bleeding had stopped or at least slowed down enough.

"So uh… first kiss, huh?" He said quietly as the corners of his lips lifted up slightly.

Lucy blushed as she lifted up the towel again, "Y-yeah… I never really got a chance to bring it up. Sorry." She put the towel back into the basket as she rooted around in it, looking for the small bottle that Wendy had given her a few months earlier.

Bickslow shrugged, "It's not as important as everyone makes it out to be."

"How so?" She asked as she twisted the lid from the bottle with her teeth, pouring a little bit of the green liquid onto the cut. He grit his teeth slightly from the sharp pain that ran through his hand, instantly trying to pull his hand away again, "I'm sorry. It's a deep cut. This will help stop it getting infected."

"I know." Bickslow replied quietly. His free hand went up to the back of her neck and she looked up inquisitively at the contact. He smirked, "And it's the ones after that count."

He leant forward as he guided Lucy gently towards him and pressed their lips together once again. Bickslow had a problem. The more time he spent with her, the more he wanted to do _that_. But their alone time had so far been limited, and he really wanted to spend more time with Lucy. He just had to find a way to do so.

Lucy pulled back just enough to leave a hair's breadth between their lips, "I'm beginning to see your point." She whispered before pressing her lips to his for the briefest of seconds before pulling back completely, her eyes going towards the basket once again as she screwed the lid back on the bottle with the green liquid.

Bickslow grinned. In such a relatively short amount of time (considering they'd only had their second date that very day), it was like Lucy had stopped being as shy as she originally had been when around him. Sure, she still had her moments – which Bickslow found adorably, honestly – but it was okay, because if she was slowly getting more comfortable around him, then it meant that they were getting closer.

Right? Right.

Bickslow found himself liking her more and more as he spent time with her. And again, it had been such a small amount of time, but the same thought that he'd had when walking home after their first date had echoed in his mind again at that moment. He was going to end up falling in love with her one day. Bickslow knew that.

And that fucking terrified him.

It was ridiculous that he was already thinking that. Fuck, it hadn't even been a month. Two dates. Several kisses that were _way_ too short. A whole bunch of 'tell me about yourself' that no one should find interesting. Time. Not enough time. Not enough time spent with _her_.

Bickslow was terrified and confused, honestly. He didn't understand any of it. He didn't believe in that 'love at first sight' nonsense that Mira would occasionally dribble on about. Hell, he didn't believe in 'love' at all.

He didn't believe in love in general until he'd kissed her, and then everything had changed. He knew it was stupid. That, he did know. You weren't supposed to _know_ you're going to fall in love with someone. That just didn't happen. He'd heard Evergreen's incessant complaints about how the girls in her romance novels had almost always fallen in love as soon as they locked eyes across the room with some leather-jacket wearing moron, or vice versa.

" _You can't fall in love at first sight! It doesn't happen that way!"_ She would always whine. _"It's gradual. It happens later, and when you know it's supposed to be like, 'duh, of course I love them!'"_

So why the hell was he so set on believing he was going to fall in love with one Lucy Heartfilia one day?

He didn't know, and that's what was making him confused.

" _One day._

" _One day you're going to wake up and realise you've hopelessly and irrevocably fallen in love with them. And until that very moment when you do realise, none of it is going to make any sense. You'll question whether you do or you don't for a long time._

" _But one day; one day it will all make sense."_

Remnants of conversations he'd had with his mother as a teenager surfaced in his mind. Remnants of conversations he'd long forgotten just because he'd never been interested in all of that. After all, he hadn't believed in love, so why would he need to remember any of it?

Oh, but with Lucy. If he were ever to fall in love with someone, it would be her. It would be Lucy Heartfilia of all people, because that's just the way the universe worked. The girl who was more or less the complete opposite of him. The girl who was the heart of Fairy Tail whether she knew it or not.

The girl he'd fought in the whole Battle of Fairy Tail fiasco.

No… no. He couldn't fall in love with her. Not couldn't. _Shouldn't._ He'd caused her enough pain for a century. You can't fall in love with someone who you've hurt.

 _Well, you can; they just won't love you back._

But what if one day, she did love him back? What then?

 _One day…_

And then Bickslow realised something.

It wasn't just him _knowing_ he was going to fall in love with her; it was him _wanting_ to fall in love with her. He wanted to wake up one day to realise he was in love with someone. He really did.

And he wanted that someone to be Lucy.

But until that day came around, he couldn't do anything. _One day, it will happen._ Until then, he had to keep those thoughts to himself, because he knew they were stupid. If they terrified him, they were surely going to terrify someone else.

 _One day…_

He'd been so lost in his thoughts, that he hadn't noticed that Lucy had finished with his hand until she spoke.

"Alright. All done!" She'd said with a smile. Bickslow looked down at the bandage that was tied around his hand. "You should still go see Wendy tomorrow."

He nodded as he balled his hand up into a fist then stretched it out, testing the movement of it. "Will do. Thanks."

Lucy gathered up everything and put it all back in the basket neatly. Turning her head, she looked up to Bickslow again, "And what exactly were you smiling about?"

"I was smiling?"

Lucy smiled, "You were grinning like a fool. Last time I checked, no one smiled like that when they were getting bandaged up."

 _Of course I was grinning._ Especially _like the fool that I am._

"Maybe it had something to do with what I was thinking about?" He replied as his grin grew wider.

"Well, what were you thinking about?"

"Do you really wanna know?"

"I guess…"

"Are you sure?" He asked again as he stood up, towering over the blonde.

"Maybe n-"

"You."

"Huh?" She blinked a few times, looking up at Bickslow who was smirking.

"I was thinking about you. And how awesome you are."

She blushed as she looked around the room, reverting to her shy self again, "O-oh…"

He laughed softly, "Yeah. Anyway, I should get going. Will I see you at the guild tomorrow?"

"Natsu and I are heading to Hargeon tomorrow morning for a job. I'll be back on Saturday afternoon though."

"Well, I guess I'll see you on Saturday then."

Lucy nodded as he turned, "Yup. Remember, 7pm!"

"I won't forget, trust me." He laughed with a wave as he turned and headed for the stairs, "Night, Lucy."

 _Wait? What? No goodnight kiss? Since when did he hold out? Did I even want him to kiss me?_

 _Hell yes, I did!_

"Hey!" She called as she folded her arms across her chest.

He stopped on the second step down, "Yeah?"

"Aren't you going to like… you know… kiss me?" She blushed furiously as she looked to the ground. _Oh, God, that's embarrassing. I should have just left it…_

Bickslow grinned as he moved over to the railing he had been sitting on before and rest his arms on it, "What? Haven't I already kissed you like… three times already today? Isn't that enough?"

"No."

"Then come over here." He said as she unfolded her arms and walked over to where he stood against the railing. With him standing on the stairs, Bickslow stood only an inch or so above Lucy. It was a weird feeling for Bickslow; that was for sure.

As soon as she was close enough, his hands went to her waist, pulling her against the railing as their lips met once again. Lucy's hands rested on his shoulders as she leaned in closer, getting lost in the feeling of his lips moving against hers, and _Oh, God the smell. How is it possible for someone to smell so good?_ She asked herself again. Lucy knew she was getting too used to it already. Too used to Bickslow. Too comfortable.

 _But none of that is necessarily bad, right?_

And then of course it had to come to an end, but all good things must come to an end at some point, and kisses were some of those good things.

"Happy now?" Bickslow asked as he kissed her quickly once again.

"Yes."

"Good," He grinned, "But I really should be going now." Bickslow stepped back as he dropped his hands to the railing; Lucy's going back to her sides. She nodded, "Night, then." Another quick kiss on her cheek as he started hopping down the stairs – two, three steps at a time.

"Good night, Bickslow." She said as she leant her elbows on the railing.

Bickslow stopped at the bottom of the stairs before turning to look up to the third floor landing with a grin, "See you Saturday, Cosplayer."

As soon as he was gone, Lucy picked up the basket she had used and headed back inside her apartment for the night. She completely forgot about the small pools of blood that had dried in various places on the floor. She was too happy at that moment, and for the first time in a long while, she was going to go to bed with a smile on her face.

* * *

 **Oh God. So _that_ happened. Honestly, I don't know how. It just did.  
Ah, fuck it. I thought some of it was cute. I was fangirling at my own work for a bit, so I might be going crazy.  
But really, let's just ignore the word vomit that was this chapter.**

Also... Natsu. Muahahaha.  
Yeah. I'll come back to that next chapter.

 **Basically everything in this chapter had nothing to do with where I want this story going. It just happened. That being said, my overall plan hasn't changed at all. :D**

 **Soooooooo, as always, please remember to review!**

 **With that, I go to bed, so good night!**

 **\- April**


	14. Chapter 14

**Yay for a long(er) chapter! I'm finding it easier to just sit down and type instead of having set days where I'll release chapters, so instead of releasing S &S on Sundays as I was originally doing, I'll be putting chapters up whenever I've finished them. At best, it will be twice a week, but I should be able to get 1 per week done for the next 2-3 weeks, and then we'll see what I can do since I'll be at university (but I'll only be there for 3 days a week). **

**Anyway - thank you again for the reviews on the last chapter. So many feelings and ugh, sometimes I don't know what I'm doing. That applies for me writing kissing scenes, too, by the way. I'm like that dog at the computer image/meme.**

 **CelticHeart - Thanks for the songs! Hehehe. And don't worry, I'm fangirl squealing with you (which is totally weird considering I'm the one writing this...).**

* * *

The last two days had exhausted Lucy to the point where she just wanted to get home and collapse onto her bed and sleep for the next week. But no, she couldn't do that.

Because Bickslow was going over to her house for dinner that night, and she was actually pretty excited about it. Lucy had no idea what she was going to cook, but she'd figure that out when she got home – _if_ she managed to get home.

It was early-afternoon as the blonde trudged along a street in Hargeon with her pink-haired partner and his blue Exceed. She yawned loudly as they ascended up the steps towards the station. A simple catch-and-arrest mission wasn't supposed to be hard – or take any longer than a day at most; but somehow, it had turned into a giant game of hide-and-seek around the port town.

As Lucy, Natsu, and Happy tried to catch some con artist, they somehow managed to get themselves into trouble with an incredibly large group of thieves and found themselves hiding from them.

Of course, Natsu was sure he could take all 100+ of them on at once, and Happy was cheering him on as usual, but Lucy… no. Lucy didn't want any part of that, so before Natsu even got a chance to utter his famous catchphrase that he charged into a battle with, the blonde had dragged him into an alley by his muffler.

Fortunately, they'd managed to find said con-artist and deliver him to the mayor without getting themselves caught by the large group of thieves that were still looking for them even though it was now the day after.

So as they waited for the boarding call for their train, Lucy rested her head on Natsu's shoulder. "Natsuuu, I'm so tired." She whined as she felt his hand come to rest atop her head.

"I know, Luce."

His nose picked up on something; something he didn't quite like. Lucy smelled… different. Like… something else. Someone else?

 _Bickslow smelled like Lucy._

 _This isn't good…_

Natsu had heard the rumours of Bickslow liking someone – which itself was rare, because it was a well-known fact that the guy didn't like people – but he hadn't paid all that much attention to it. Who cared if he liked someone?

But… what if that someone was Lucy?

And what did it matter, anyway? So what if he liked Lucy. It's not like Lucy could like Bickslow. Right?

 _But why the hell did Bickslow smell like Lucy?!_

 _And why does Lucy smell different?_

 _WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!_

"Luce," Natsu said quietly, turning his head slightly to look down at the blonde hair that was rubbing against the side of his face.

"Mm-hmm?" Came her mumbled response.

"You smell different."

She lifted her head suddenly, her brow furrowed in confusion, "Huh?" _I smell different? What the hell?_

"You smell different," He repeated as he shrugged his shoulders, "And Bickslow smells like you."

 _Oh God… no… no… Natsu can't have figured it out. Not Natsu,_ "Where are you going with this…" She said cautiously.

"I dunno. Do you like him?"

"W-what?" She took a step back in shock. Sure, it was like Natsu to be blunt and get to the point, but… she didn't think she was ready to say 'Yeah, I like Bickslow. I like Bickslow _a_ _lot_ ,' just because of what she'd seen Erza do when he wouldn't apologise for kissing her.

He turned as he heard the boarding announcement, "Never mind."

She watched as he headed towards the carriage door, blinking a few times as she tried to figure out if she was actually awake or not. Natsu never acted that way. It was like he was almost trying to watch his tongue; as if to _not_ put his foot in his mouth for once. That just wasn't what Natsu did.

That wasn't even the worst part. The worst part was that it was like he'd already figured it out, and Lucy didn't know how – especially just from his nose alone.

* * *

The train ride back to Magnolia had been slow and arduous to Lucy. Her best friend who was lying on the chair opposite her was ignoring her (and it wasn't just the usual silence since he was usually too nauseous to speak), and she didn't know why. _Why was he being like this?_

So when the train pulled in to Magnolia Station at a little after 3:30PM, Lucy was a little glad that it was over. She didn't think she'd be able to handle another minute of silence aboard that train.

As Natsu staggered out of the carriage and they began to head their separate ways, he stopped. "Are you going to the guild?" He asked as he looked over his shoulder.

Lucy turned at the voice, a little shocked that he was talking to her then. She shook her head slowly before she looked up to meet Natsu's gaze, "Not tonight. I'll see you tomorrow, Natsu." She said quietly as she smiled.

"Bye, Lucy!" Happy chimed in from where he stood next to Natsu.

Natsu just looked down to the ground. He felt like he'd stepped into territory where he shouldn't have, which rarely happened. He realised that Lucy obviously didn't want to talk about whatever it was she was doing with Bickslow – he didn't really want to think about what that could be – but he knew she'd talk when she was ready. They were best friends, and she'd always come to him when she needed to talk and she told him almost everything that was going on.

 _So why should now be any different?_

 _She'll tell you when she's ready_ , he told himself as he looked up again. "Later, Lucy!" He grinned with a wave of his hand as she turned again, meeting his smile with her own before she headed towards the other end of the platform.

 _Yeah. She'll tell you about whatever is going on involving Bickslow… eventually._

* * *

Lucy stared at her couch for a solid 10 minutes a little later that afternoon. She'd since changed, so as she stood there in her black leggings that ended just below her knees and her oversized baby-pink woollen sweater, she considered whether she should take a nap before she had to start getting dinner organised and changed once again.

She stared at the salmon-coloured lounge. _Oh, it just looks so warm and inviting_ , she thought. The two small white cushions that sat in the corner would be so soft, and the grey blanket that hung over the back of the lounge would keep her nice and toasty and warm if she were to wrap herself up in it…

"Maybe just for an hour?" She mumbled to no one in particular (since she was alone in her house).

So as she took a step towards the lounge that was beckoning her to come closer, her fingers briefly touched Horologium's key; sending a silent message to her clock spirit to wake her up in an hour's time.

A knock on her door woke her from her slumber, so as she sat up, the grey blanket pooling around her hips as she did so, she yawned and stretched her arms above her head. _It mustn't have been an hour yet if Horologium hasn't woken me up_ , she thought as she walked over to the door, smoothing her hair down with her hands as she did so. She yawned again as her hand came to rest on the handle. She felt a little more refreshed after her nap, but she still felt like she could have slept for a week.

She pulled the door open, revealing Bickslow who was clad in dark jeans and a dark blue long-sleeved shirt with the sleeves pushed up to his elbows.

And of course that hood and visor combo he was rarely seen without.

"Bickslow?" She said quietly, "Aren't you a little… early?"

He blinked a few times under his visor, "Huh? What are you talking about? It's like 7:30. I got caught up at the guild, so I'm technically late…"

"7:30?!" Her voice rose a few tones and she turned and looked at the clock on the wall behind her. _Crap, it really was 7:30. Why the hell didn't Horologium get me up?!_ She turned around to face Bickslow again. The corners of his mouth were twitching in amusement, "Uh… right, sorry. Come in." She stepped aside, leaving him enough room to get through.

He chuckled quietly, "I would say that I was sorry for being late, but it looks like you forgot." Bickslow brought up the bottle of wine he was holding behind his back, "Also, I brought this. I don't know. You're supposed to do that kind of thing, right?" Because he still didn't understand or know any of the usual conventions of a date. He was winging it, mostly. Evergreen and Freed weren't as much of a help as they thought they were.

"I didn't forget," She huffed as she took the wine and read the label. _Damn, that's nice wine,_ she thought to herself, "And I was… asleep…" Lucy blushed as she scurried into the kitchen, placing the bottle on one of the counters as she thought about what the hell she was supposed to do for dinner.

Bickslow was grinning by this point, still finding it amusing that she had fallen asleep and he had woken her up. He walked further into the room slowly, looking around at everything. The first thing he noticed was the pink. _So. Much. Pink._ Pink walls, pink bed, hell – the lounge was kind of pink, too.

And the books. There were so many books. Lucy owned more books than he did, and that was saying something since the only things he ever received as gifts from Freed were books.

And he hadn't read a single one of them in all the years he'd known the Rune mage.

Bickslow moved over to the desk that was at the end of her bed as he spied the stack of papers on it. _What's this?_ He picked up the page on the top of the pile, bringing it up as his eyes skimmed the words. _Is this a story?_

He turned at the gasp from the other side of the room, and suddenly the blonde was standing before him. "D-don't read that!" She stuttered as she reached up to grab the page.

"Why not?" He held the page up and out of her reach, grinning as her blush turned into the most adorable pout he'd ever seen in his life.

"Because I don't want you to. It's embarrassing…"

Bickslow looked to the page in his hand and cleared his throat rather dramatically, " _'Once upon a time…'_ " He started reading the words on the page. _Ah, so it_ is _a story._

"Bickslow… please don't read it."

He put the page down back on the pile it had come from as he sensed the discomfort in her voice. His uninjured hand went to sit on her waist as he lowered his head. "Did you write it?" He asked quietly and she nodded. "Can I read it one day?"

She looked up suddenly, a little shocked that he would _want_ to read her story. "You'd actually want to?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I?"

"I don't know. I haven't even finished it yet…"

"Then I'll read it when you've finished it," he leaned in closer, "that is, if you'll let me."

"Maybe…" Lucy whispered. Only Levy had read what she had so far, and the Script mage seemed to like it. But with Bickslow wanting to read it, she suddenly felt extremely self-conscious of her work. _He wouldn't hate it if he read it, right?_

Bickslow grinned as he leant down even further, their faces only an inch apart, "Good enough for me." And as he went to kiss the blonde, she shook her head as her hands came to rest flat on his chest, pushing him back slightly, "Hey, now…" _First she complained I didn't kiss her, and now she's not letting me?!_

"Nope. Not until that… hood-helmet-visor- _thing-"_ Lucy gestured to the article of 'clothing' on his head that he almost always had.

"Thing."

"-goes."

He raised his eyebrows under his visor, "Really?"

"Really."

Bickslow sighed. _The things I'll do for you, Cosplayer._ So as he unclipped the visor and placed it on the desk to the side, he pushed the hood back enough to let it fall the rest of the way off, leaving the purple crest and the rest of the material to gather around the collar of his shirt.

"Now can I?" A smirk played across his mouth as Lucy nodded, and Bickslow leant down once again, pressing their lips together a little firmer than usual. They stayed like that for only a few seconds; lips not moving a single millimetre. As they pulled apart, he rested his forehead on hers and whispered, "Hi, by the way." Another smirk.

Lucy blushed – something that Bickslow was honestly getting used to seeing. "Okay, so. Small problem." She said as she laughed nervously.

His brow furrowed in confusion. _Problem?_ "Hm?"

"So… since I kind of… fell asleep," she mumbled as he grinned again, "The stuff I had planned for dinner isn't going to work now since I was supposed to start getting it ready like an hour and a half ago…"

"Hmm… that really is a bit of a problem," He lied, of course. As much as he loved food (Freed knew that first hand), he wasn't there for the food. He was there for the blonde, "But I have a solution to that problem."

"As long as it doesn't involve you doi-"

He remembered a certain cake store that was always open late a few streets over, and well… cake seemed like a good solution. "Chocolate or vanilla?"

Lucy blinked as she tried to understand the question. More so as to _why_ Bickslow was asking, "Huh?"

"Which one do you prefer?" He stepped back as he picked up the visor from the desk before turning back to face the blonde who was quite clearly confused by the question. He seemed to be confusing her a lot lately – something he had to admit was a little entertaining.

"Uh… vanilla, I guess? Why?"

Bickslow turned and headed towards the door, leaving Lucy standing there. "I told you I have a solution," He grinned as his tongue lolled from his mouth, "I'll be back in a bit."

 _Wait, what?_ "What? Hey!" She took a step forward as he pulled the door open, "Where are you going?" _Was he really leaving?! In the middle of what was technically supposed to be a date?!_

"Leave the door open?" He called and then the door closed behind him, leaving the blonde alone in her apartment.

"O-kay?" She let it hang in the air as she looked around the empty apartment. _What the hell had just happened?_

* * *

Bickslow had the box housing the cake balanced on two of his Babies as he climbed the stairs, pushing his hood back again as he reached the third floor landing.

He pushed the door to her apartment open tentatively. Bickslow was half expecting Lucy to be just on the other side, standing with her weight on one leg and her arms folded, ready to scold him for leaving during their date. That was something he deserved, and he knew that. He hadn't realised how much of a stupid idea it was until _after_ he'd already left her building, and he wasn't one for running back with his tail between his legs.

Which led him to imagining how he'd look with a tail.

But no. Lucy wasn't waiting for him on the other side of the door. Instead, she was lying on the lounge with her head towards the door and didn't look like she had noticed or cared (maybe a bit of both?) that he had returned.

Bickslow crept towards the lounge. As he did so, he noticed that on the coffee table just in front of the L-shaped lounge sat the wine he had brought over, alongside two glasses; one of which was half full while the other was empty.

He slightly hovered over her from where he now stood at the end of the lounge. Her forearm was covering her eyes and her breathing was steady. Bickslow came to three separate conclusions: she was either asleep (not that he could understand how that could be possible since he had only been gone for 20 minutes at most), she really hadn't noticed he was back, or she actually knew he was there and was just waiting for the perfect moment to scare him half to death. Lucy didn't seem like the type to do the third, so it was either the first or the second.

As he knelt down at the end of the lounge above her head, he spoke quietly, "Lucy."

The blonde jumped up at the sudden noise, and as she tried to sit up, her forehead collided with something hard.

No… not something else. _Someone_ else.

She rubbed her hand on her forehead as she successfully sat up on her second attempt, turning to sit on her knees on the lounge.

"Nice, Cosplayer…" He grumbled as he rubbed his own forehead, shaking his head slightly as he remained in his crouched position.

"Oh God, Bicks," Lucy said quietly as she dropped her hand from her forehead to her mouth, trying to hold in the giggle that was attempting to escape. It was a little funny. She would be the first to admit that. If she had been paying attention, she would have heard her door open or even heard him walk up, but no, of course that hadn't happened. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know you were there." She managed to get out as she began laughing.

He couldn't help but smile as he shook his head again, "I gathered that."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Anyway," The two totems that supported the box moved to hover directly above him before their bodies disappeared, dropping the box in his hands. "I told you I had a solution." Bickslow flipped the lid on the box, showing the large vanilla cake topped with _a lot_ of whipped cream and strawberries, plus the strawberries and cream that were sandwiched between the two layers of the cake.

Lucy raised an eyebrow, "Cake?"

"You sound like you've never had cake for dinner before."

"That's because I haven't." She said as she got up from the lounge and walked into the kitchen on the other side of the room.

 _Who hasn't had cake for dinner before?!_ "You've been missing out." He called towards the kitchen as he took a seat on the lounge, placing the box on the coffee table.

As Lucy grabbed the plates from the cupboard, she thought about how their last date hadn't exactly gone so well (since Bickslow was dying from boredom, or so he said), but they had turned it around to make it so it wasn't a complete disaster. Lucy realised that that's what was happening then, also. She'd fallen asleep and completely forgotten to get dinner organised so her plans had fallen through. Not to mention her attempting to sit up and colliding with his head – which was partly Bickslow's fault for being there in the first place.

But they were making it work and trying to avoid turning the night into a complete disaster.

"So," Lucy said as she sat on the lounge next to Bickslow with one leg folded under her, "how's your hand?"

Bickslow took the plate with the slice of cake on it that the blonde offered him, placing his glass back down on the table, "Better," He lifted up his hand, showing Lucy the red line that went across his hand, "as long as I don't find myself pushing away any more swords in the near future, it will be fine."

Lucy nodded, "That's good."

"Yeah. So anyway, how was your job?" Bickslow asked as he took a forkful of the cake.

"Frustrating." She said with a sigh. Frustrating really was putting it mildly, but she went on to explain the last day and a half to Bickslow regardless, and it made him shake his head a few times or laugh. Whether that was at her expense or something else, she wouldn't know.

Unfortunately, as she retold the events of her job, she remembered her short but uncomfortable conversation with Natsu from earlier that day.

But she wasn't going to dwell on that for the time being. No, she was going to enjoy spending time with Bickslow.

* * *

Later, Lucy shamefully realised that they'd eaten the entire cake and washed it down with the rest of the wine. Bickslow didn't seem to care. If anything, he found Lucy's reaction to realising she'd eaten half a cake incredibly entertaining.

"I'm actually kind of impressed, to be honest." He'd laughed as she put her face in her hands.

Lucy shook her head, "You shouldn't be."

"Hmm, note to self:" Bickslow pulled her hands away from her face, "Lucy likes cake."

 _He did it again. Lucy instead of Cosplayer._ She looked up and saw the smirk that graced his mouth. The smirk that just screams how he knows exactly what he did, just by saying one name. She felt her heart beat faster and she could have sworn her hands had started sweating as he leant in, bringing their faces even closer.

And then his lips briefly brushed against hers before leaving a small gap between them again. "Yeah… I uh… I guess I do." She whispered against the ever-present smirk as she felt the heat in her face rise, and then the blonde closed the small gap between them again as she pressed her lips to Bickslow's.

Bickslow was stunned for the briefest of moments at the new intensity that came from it, but it was the shortest of split seconds. A hand went to rest on her waist as the other went to the back of her neck. He felt a hand come to rest on his shoulder and the other to his side, and suddenly he realised they were leaning backwards towards the lounge. He didn't know if he was subconsciously pulling them back, or if Lucy was pushing then.

 _Oh, who fucking cares? Just go with it_ , he told himself as he deepened the kiss further.

Lucy felt Bickslow pull her bottom lip into her mouth, and then his to- _holy shit, was that his tongue?!_ Her mind started to freak out, but regardless, she opened her mouth slightly as her mind descended into another round of freaking out. _Yup, definitely his tongue. Holy shit._

The worst part was that she had no idea what she was doing. The countless romance novels she'd read over the years never explained in enough detail. The blonde needed a 'How to Kiss 101' book. But no, they didn't exist – not that she knew of, anyway.

So instead, she just tried her best to mimic Bickslow, but she felt like she was failing epically regardless.

Aside from that, the only word that came to mind then was 'pleasant'. Something about it was pleasant, and that surprised her. She expected it to be gross and weird – which, she had to admit that it was. Hello? She had someone else's tongue in her mouth.

But it was overwhelmingly _pleasant_.

So there she was in her apartment, half lying on top of Fairy Tail's resident Human Possession Seith mage/possibly one of the most perverted ones in the guild (and there really were a lot of them… including Natsu and Gray), and making out with him.

It was something she'd never expected to happen in a million-and-one years, but it was happening.

Because screw it, she liked the guy.

And then when they both apparently decided it was time to end the pleasantness, a part of her wanted to run away and hide in a hole somewhere to hide from the embarrassment. The other part, however, wanted to stay right there. Laying on top of Bickslow. And her lounge. Sort of. A mix of the two at the same time, really.

But even if she had any intentions of running and hiding, she wouldn't have been able to, simply because Bickslow had at some point moved his arm so that it was wrapped around her back, and she didn't mind it. Not one bit. Lucy was content like that.

"I need to talk to you about something." Lucy had said quietly as she moved to rest her head on his shoulder.

Bickslow grabbed the small cushion that sat just next to where he lay on the couch, moving it so that it was behind his head before he moved his free hand to rest on it, making himself a little more comfortable.

 _Talk? Why does that sound bad…?_

"What about?" He replied, trying his best to smother the panic that was growing inside of him.

Lucy sighed as she propped herself up on an elbow, meeting Bickslow's gaze, "I like… _this_ ," A blush spread across her cheeks as her eyes briefly flicked elsewhere in the room before returning back to Bickslow. _No, no. You've gotta talk about it. Don't be shy now._ "I mean, I like whatever _this_ is that we're doing, and I really do like you…" _Dating? Seeing each other? Hanging out? Yeah. 'This' is just a lot better,_ she thought.

"I sense there's a 'but' coming." Bickslow was fist-pumping internally. _It's a thing! And she likes me!_ He felt like a teenager at that moment, which really wasn't all that different from how he usually was.

She nodded, "But… I don't want to tell anyone… yet."

"Yet?"

"Yet. Just because I'm fairly certain you'd have a few hundred swords pointed at you…"

"H-hundred?" Just one sword pointed at him two days earlier had been terrifying, but _multiple?!_

"And turned into an ice cube or something… and then you'd probably be burned to a crisp…"

 _That sounds… like Fairy Tail. Charming. Absolutely charming. Not at all dangerous or terrifying. Oh, who are you kidding – you're a member of Fairy Tail; you knew what you were getting in to,_ he thought."Not all at once, right?"

"Uh… maybe?" Lucy laughed nervously at the mental image of Bickslow being surrounded by the members of her team – all looking equally as menacing and pissed off. Unfortunately, the thought of Bickslow being burned to a crisp by Natsu reminded her of something else… something that she really did need to talk about. "But that being said…"

"Go on."

She considered the plan once again. The plan that was probably going to end badly for everyone involved no matter what.

If Natsu had already figured out there was something between her and Bickslow, then wouldn't it just be easier to tell him straight out that she liked him and there was a 'thing' between them instead of having Natsu try and figure it out on his own? Because God knows that if he found out on his own, then all hell would break loose.

She just wanted to make the 'hell-breaking' a little more… bearable.

So it wasn't really a terrible plan… right? She just had to keep telling herself that.

"I do think I should tell Natsu though. He said something weird this morning…" She trailed off into silence.

Bickslow tensed at the mention of Natsu, instantly reminding him of what the Dragon Slayer had said to him in the guild previously. "Uh, did that 'something weird' have anything to do with dragon senses?"

"Oh, God. He didn't say anything to you, did he?" The panic was evident in her voice. Lucy didn't want to think about what Natsu could have possibly said to Bickslow. It couldn't have been good, that was for sure.

"He said something about not underestimating a dragon's nose." Bickslow mumbled. Lucy dropped her head back to her shoulder as she groaned, apparently knowing what it meant. "What did he say to you?"

 _That you apparently smell like me. No, you can't say that. It sounds weird if it comes from anyone apart from a Dragon Slayer._ "More or less the same thing, but he knows there's _something_ going on."

"Well…" _So Natsu knows something._ Bickslow expected Natsu to be the last to figure anything out, but no, it couldn't happen that way. He thought about Natsu's possible reactions to finding out that he was doing 'something' with Lucy (he had no idea what to call what they were doing, so it was just going to stay as 'something' for a while), and none of them ended with him living. Well, not in his mind anyway. "If you do tell Natsu, I'd recommend not doing so in the guild… and making sure I'm not anywhere in the vicinity. I kind of value my life."

"I'll try. Are you okay with not telling anyone else though? Apart from the people who already do know… and who exactly is that, by the way? Apart from Gajeel."

"It makes sense to not tell anyone, so I'm fine with it," And he was, just because he really did value his life. There was a very high possibility that half of the guild would freak out at the news, and the fair majority of those would probably want his head on a stake – whether it be from jealousy, because he wasn't an idiot; he'd heard half of the guys in the guild talk about how they'd love to take her on a date (or do _other_ things), or just from the countless number of people who probably still held a grudge against him for the many pranks he'd pulled over the years. "And the only other people who know are Laxus, Freed, and Ever."

"What about Mira?"

Bickslow let out a short laugh. "Mira is still trying to get me to admit that I apparently have a crush on you." Which, was something he wouldn't admit – not for a while, anyway – because it wasn't exactly true. Almost every single time he'd been up to the bar, she had pestered him about it and every single time he had denied it. He would continue denying it.

Lucy sighed quietly, "Mira could prove to be a small problem."

"She'll forget about it. I'll handle her." Just one well-thought response and there'd be no more questions. Bickslow just had to think of what to say without making it worse.

As the conversation topics changed over the course of the night, Lucy found herself tired once again, but she didn't want to ask Bickslow to leave. She was enjoying getting to know even more about him (and vice-versa), and she was actually quite comfortable.

Not to mention happy. She was happy because she'd actually admitted _out loud_ that she liked Bickslow – _to_ Bickslow. Lucy couldn't even remember if she'd said it out loud to herself before, but that didn't matter anymore because it was just a step forward. A small step forward, at that, but it was still forward. She realised that that small step forward was a step towards it actually going somewhere… towards an actual relationship, perhaps.

And that actually scared her. It scared her, but it excited her because she liked Bickslow.

So as they continued learning more about each other, Bickslow realised she'd never talked about her family much. He'd heard bits and pieces about it when he'd been in the guild occasionally, but he never paid much attention to it. He just knew she was a Heartfilia – a name he learned he should have known, but didn't. But he wanted to hear about her family _from_ her.

"Tell me about your family." He said quietly.

 _My family? Doesn't everyone in the guild already know everything about my family?_ "Well, what do you want to know?" Because really, it was a strangely vague question. She didn't know if Bickslow meant her actual family, or just her family's old business. Both had completely different answers.

"Like your parents and stuff, I guess. What are they like?"

Lucy shifted a bit as she grew uncomfortable. _He doesn't know?_ "There's not much to tell then. Both of my parents died…" She murmured.

 _Shit, nice one, Bicks,_ he mentally slapped his hand against his forehead. Trust himself to say something stupid like that. "Oh. I'm sorry… I didn't know…"

"It's okay." Lucy stifled a yawn. "My mother died when I was young, so I grew up with my father. She was a Celestial Spirit mage too, so that's how I have contracts with a few of my Spirits since she passed them on to me. She was always so kind and caring; especially to her spirits. I always thought she was an amazing mage, and I still do, I guess. But she grew ill and was forced to retire from using magic."

"She sounds amazing." Bickslow said quietly.

Lucy smiled softly, "She really was. My father, though… He passed away about a month before we all came back from Tenrou Island. I honestly spent a lot of my life hating him. I always thought he didn't care about me; only caring about the company, but I eventually understood why he'd done that but by the time I'd understood, it was too late to apologise for the way I'd treated him after I joined the guild."

Bickslow remained silent, not wanting to say anything else that would make him want to bang his head against a wall. Instead, he tightened his hold around her waist, pulling her closer against his body. It was the simple things like that he hoped would show her that he cared.

"Anyway," Lucy's voice had perked up a little from the previous tone, "What about yours? I've never once heard you mention anything even remotely close to a family."

"No need."

"How come?"

"'Cause Fairy Tail's my family."

Lucy propped herself up on her elbow again, "The guild is my family too, but what about your parents? Siblings? Anything?"

"Well, I mean, I haven't seen any of them for something like thirteen years now." Bickslow sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. He was never fond of talking about his family. In fact, he made a point of avoiding it all-together, but it was only fair he talked about his since Lucy had talked about hers even though it was a sensitive subject. "But, my parents. Let's see…

"My dad was a member of the Rune Knights. He'd come home all the time and tell stories about his day and how the council was always having to clean up after the mess that this crazy guild called Fairy Tail had caused."

Lucy giggled. _So Fairy Tail was causing trouble for the council even back then? That's not all that surprising._

"My mother was the kind of person who was just somehow good at everything. She absolutely loved reading and she would spend a lot of time cooking. If she wasn't reading or cooking, she was most likely yelling at me or my dad for doing something stupid, or just at me for messing with someone. But they died when I was 16. I guess they got caught in the crossfire between a few Dark guilds a couple of towns over from where we lived."

"I'm sorry to hear that…" Lucy murmured.

He shrugged slightly, "Nothing anyone could do about it. Anyway, so that left me with my sisters."

"Sisters?"

"I have two sisters. They're twins, actually, and they're terrible. Well, they used to be. To _me_ , anyway. But I was horrible to them, so it worked out."

"Who'd they look like more?" Lucy asked through a yawn, making Bickslow chuckle.

 _So many questions._ "They looked exactly like my mother, but they got the hair from my dad's side."

"Is that where the blue hair comes from?"

"Yup."

"Mohawks and all?" She mumbled.

Bickslow laughed again. He was having a hard time picturing the sisters he hadn't seen for thirteen years with _his_ hair, but what he did picture wasn't very pleasing to the eyes at all. "No way. But anyway, I haven't seen them for a long time now. I left a few months later when I turned 17. Found myself in Magnolia and staring at the guild doors."

"Do you ever miss them?"

Bickslow actually had to think about his answer. He'd thought of his actual family only a handful of times, and they were usually just when he'd find an old photograph of the entire family when he was cleaning out his wardrobe or drawers, or when it was one of their birthdays. Even though it had only felt like five years to him, it had been thirteen for them; for his sisters that he'd mostly hated, just because they were his sisters. You never got along with your siblings.

But did he miss them? He realised he didn't, and he knew he should've felt at least a little guilty about it, but the truth was that he didn't actually _need_ to miss them. He had the guild, and he had his team. Freed and Evergreen were his family, as well as Laxus.

Fairy Tail was a family. They were _his_ family.

"Not really."

* * *

When the room fell into a comfortable silence a short while later, he craned his neck to look at the clock on the wall to the side of the lounge.

12:48AM the clock read, and Bickslow figured it was probably time to go.

"Lucy?" He said softly as he looked back to the blonde. No response. _Did she… did she fall asleep?_ Bickslow lifted his head off the pillow, moving just enough to see that her eyes were closed. She was out like a light, and Bickslow didn't know what to do.

On one hand, he started freaking out because she'd fallen asleep on him and he didn't want to wake her up by moving her. On the other hand, he wondered what she would think if he'd managed to move without waking her up. Would she think he was being an ass by leaving without saying anything? Bickslow had done that all too many times before, but never with someone he actually cared about.

Hell, it was the silent rule when it came to his usual lifestyle. If he'd gone back to the girl's house, he'd either leave straight after or before she woke up. The same applied if they went back to his own house, just vice-versa.

But with Lucy… it was different. She wasn't just some random one-night-stand he'd never have to see again. He hadn't even _slept_ with her, and he really had no intentions to (not any time soon, anyway, which was surprising to even himself). He wanted to know her and everything there was to know about her. He didn't want to screw it up by doing something stupid like leaving or not leaving.

So, the question was: what was he going to do?

 _I could always… stay. And let her sleep…_

 _Yeah, I'll just stay here… She'll probably wake up in a bit when she's realised she's uncomfortable and I'll just leave then._

And so Bickslow pulled the blanket that sat over the back off the lounge off and draped it over her and part of himself. A part of Bickslow was telling him to just leave even though he'd already made up his mind. It was the part of him that was painfully aware of how uncomfortable he was. One foot was flat on the ground with his knee bent, and the other foot was hanging off the end of the lounge.

Bickslow would occasionally find himself hating that he was incredibly tall, and this was one of those moments.

But it was the other part of him that was agreeing with the decision he'd already made. The part that reassured him that Lucy was comfortable – at least she looked it for the time being – and that was enough for Bickslow to stay. She looked too peaceful when she was asleep for him to even think about disturbing her.

So as he shifted ever so slightly in an attempt to make himself just a tiny bit more comfortable, he stared up at the ceiling, with one arm behind his head on the small, white pillow, and the other around her back.

* * *

Bickslow's plan failed.

Well, not so much _failed_ , it just didn't go as planned.

Lucy hadn't moved for the rest of the night, and Bickslow had eventually fallen asleep when he was tired enough.

When the blonde woke up to the sunlight streaming in through her window on the other side of the room, she had a minor panic-attack when the light wasn't shining directly in her eyes like it usually did, and her first thought had been that she wasn't even in her own apartment.

But as she opened her eyes and propped herself up on her elbow again, she realised that she was in her apartment; she had just used Bickslow as a pillow.

As she sat up completely, Bickslow stirred at the movement. Sure, he'd fallen asleep, but the overwhelming discomfort from sleeping in such a position had only let him go into a light sleep.

"Did I… Did I fall asleep… on you?" Lucy asked quietly, turning her head to the side as she blushed.

"Yeah." He replied as he stood up. _Ah, I can move again!_ He stretched his arms above his head as he yawned, the hem of his shirt rising slightly above where it sat over his jeans. He smirked when Lucy's head turned again, her eyes trailing down to the skin that was now visible at his hips, the blush instantly coming back as she turned away. _I saw where you were looking._

"I uh… sorry…" She mumbled.

Bickslow shrugged as he dropped his arms, "Anyway. I should probably leave. Freed said something about a job yesterday, so I need to go find him." He stepped over to where she was sitting on the lounge still.

"Oh, okay." Lucy said as she looked up, "Will you be in the guild later?"

"Probably not." He stepped back as Lucy stood up, "So I guess I'll see you… whenever I see you next." Bickslow smirked.

"I guess so."

"Yeah, anyway. Time to go." He leant down, pressing a kiss to her cheek lightly before turning and heading towards the door. "Later, Lucy."

"Bye, Bickslow." Lucy said as she smiled, turning and heading towards the bathroom on the other side of the room.

Bickslow glanced at the clock on the wall as he picked up his visor from the table near the door. _8:43AM. Freed would definitely be at the guild by this time._

So as Lucy disappeared into the bathroom, Bickslow pulled her door open. Unfortunately, the empty landing of the third floor was not the sight that greeted him.

Instead, it was Natsu with his arms folded across his chest, glaring back at him which made Bickslow feel like the Dragon Slayer was staring into his _own_ soul for a change.

* * *

 **This is what happens when I let the characters go their own way. Well... Natsu finding out, anyway. That was never planned, but it's fun.**

 **Did I mention I can't write kissing scenes? Like AT ALL. I cringe when I re-read these sometimes.**

 **Anyway, I proof-read this late again and I honestly just wanted to get this chapter finished tonight so I can go to bed and work on _A Peculiar Situation_ tomorrow, so if there's any errors, I apologise. **

**With that being said, please remember to review! Criticism/fangirl squealing/even just a 'hello' and I'll love you forever! Hehe.**

 **\- April**


	15. Chapter 15

***giggles* All of your reviews made me smile! Now, for the multiple replies.** _  
_

CelticHeart - Oh God. I love all of the triplets' works, I really do. Especially Gem's BixLu one... I have no words. *melting from my feels*  
I know I've mentioned the OOC thing before, but it's kind of at that point where it's hard not to have them OOC, but I'm still trying, so thank you. :D

Kurahieiritr JIO (Just Kura JIO from now on because... well, it's hard to remember without copying + pasting) - I've already had to revise my overall plan for this because of the way things have turned out, and I laugh to (and at) myself when I think about ways to make it entertaining. But in regards to keeping Bickslow alive... well, we need that to happen, duh. We can't have Natsu going on a rampage. :P

Swallowmysoul - I know I sent you a message about this, but when I read your review, I was sitting with my friend and I burst out laughing. Well done, haha.

 **As always, I hope you all enjoy it!**

* * *

 _Oh, fuck. Did it just get really hot again? This is not good. This is not good._

 _This is not fucking good._

Bickslow shuffled awkwardly in the doorframe as he stared back at Natsu, not daring to break eye contact with the Dragon Slayer. He had a feeling as soon as he did so, he'd be on the floor, on fire, or dead. Or perhaps all three at once, who really knew?

A part of Bickslow wanted to just push past the guy and run away – far, _far_ away, but running would just make things worse. He knew that. The other part of him wanted to just try and talk his way out of it, try and make Natsu believe it was just a quick stop-by that morning for a job, or something, but he knew that wouldn't work either. Based on what Lucy had said, Natsu already knew something, and his leaving Lucy's apartment at 8:43AM was, well… it wasn't good for anyone, really.

So as he fiddled with the visor that he had in one, he turned his head slightly (making sure not to break eye contact because he really did value his life), he called into the apartment, loud enough for the blonde to hear – wherever she may have been, "Lucy…"

"What?" Lucy called from the bathroom. She'd thought Bickslow had already left, but then again… she hadn't heard the familiar click of her front door closing as she went into the bathroom. After all, it was just a curtain separating the two rooms.

"You uh… have a… visi-" Bickslow was cut off by something hard – and incredibly fucking hot – being pressed into the side of his jaw, and then he was on his back on the floor inside Lucy's apartment. He'd blinked, and he'd been punched by Natsu, or so he could assume. He could vaguely feel the broken coffee table he was apparently laying on, and he was a little glad that they'd moved the empty glasses and the wine bottle the night before.

Oh, but his jaw was absolutely killing him. His hand went up to rub at the spot that Natsu's fist had collided with, and it dawned on him that Natsu had gone easy on him. Bickslow had fought Natsu before, and he'd punched by the guy multiple times, but that then… he had been holding back, and it still hurt like hell.

Suddenly, Natsu was over him and had Bickslow pulled up by the collar of his shirt and his other fist balled up a mere inches from his face. He was just itching to punch the Seith mage again – like a lot of people in the guild, Bickslow knew.

At the sound of furniture breaking, Lucy wrapped the large, white towel around herself and rushed out into the main room. She hadn't heard what Bickslow had said because he hadn't had a chance to finish the sentence, and when Lucy saw the Seith mage and her Dragon Slayer of a best friend on the floor (on top of her coffee table which she had only just replaced a month or so earlier), she understood why Bickslow hadn't been able to finish his sentence.

"Natsu?!" Lucy squealed, "What the hell are you doing?"

Both sets of eyes went to the blonde who was standing just in front of the curtain that separated the bathroom and the main room.

She was in a towel.

 _She just has to be wearing a fucking towel._

Bickslow's gaze returned to Natsu. A low growl was resonating from his chest and Bickslow knew he'd already jumped to the wrong conclusion. He dropped his hand from his face to raise them both in surrender, "I swear it's not what it looks like!" He yelled at Natsu who was staring back at him with renewed anger.

Natsu's grip around his shirt tightened and his other fist hovered above his face. _Lucy's in a towel and Bickslow was just leaving her place. What the fuck is going on?!_ "You…" Natsu growled in a low voice.

"Natsu! Stop it! Let him go!" Lucy shouted as she stepped forward and close enough to wrap her arms around Natsu's waist, attempting to pull her off of Bickslow (or at least to give him a hint).

"Not until someone explains what the fuck is going on here!" Natsu screamed frantically as he looked over his shoulder at the blonde who was still trying to pull him away from Bickslow.

More than anything, Bickslow just wanted to get out of that apartment and away from Natsu. He was fighting the urge to just yell it out to the pink-haired Dragon Slayer that was sitting over him, but Lucy had already decided she'd tell him and Bickslow didn't want to be anywhere near Natsu when that happened. If Bickslow were to blurt it out that he was 'sort of dating Lucy' then he'd probably be sent through the floor and into whoever's apartment it was on the floor below.

But with Lucy coming out in a towel and his leaving (well, getting caught leaving) in the morning, it had probably just made things a lot worse.

"Just get off of Bickslow, and I'll explain, alright?" Lucy said as she continued pulling with her arms around Natsu's middle. "Please, Natsu."

Lucy felt terrible – mostly for Bickslow just because he was Natsu's current target. But it got Lucy wondering; if this was Natsu's reaction to just finding him leaving her apartment in the morning, what was he going to think when he found out they were, well… kind of dating? Would he flip out on her? _No, no. Natsu wouldn't do that_ _to me_ , she told herself.

Natsu's grip on Bickslow's shirt eventually loosened and he stood up, stepping away from him as he shrugged Lucy off of him. Natsu wasn't happy, oh no. Not one bit. He'd come to tell Lucy he had a job that would be perfect for them to do for the day since it was in Magnolia, but he didn't care about that anymore.

No, he just wanted to find out what was going on.

Natsu continued glaring at Bickslow as he got up slowly. "Get out." He said in a low voice.

 _This is my chance! This is my chance to escape! Run for your life, Bicks! Don't look back!_ Bickslow only nodded as he headed towards the door at lightning speed, "Don't have to tell me twice." He mumbled under his breath. Bickslow didn't even remember to pick up his visor that he had dropped just by the door when he'd been spent to the ground. He just wanted to get out of there, and fast.

Natsu stared at the closed door for a while, his fists balled up at his sides. Telling Bickslow to leave was his kindness for the day and all of his thinking put in to one moment. Bickslow was Natsu's friend, but… he had a feeling he wasn't going to like whatever it was Lucy had to explain, and as he probably would have ended up punching Bickslow a little – a lot – harder, and then he'd have to deal with Lucy.

"Natsu…" Lucy said quietly as she took a seat on her lounge, patting the spot next to her, motioning for her friend to sit down. As she placed her hands in her lap, she realised she was shaking. _Why am I so nervous?_ She asked herself, _telling Natsu will be a good thing. Telling your best friend is a step forward… but if he freaks out even more then maybe it won't be…_

As she took a steadying breath, she lifted her gaze to meet Natsu's. His eyes were flickering with rage and she could feel the heat coming from him; something she'd come to know as what happened when he got pissed off.

"You asked me yesterday if I liked Bickslow." She said as she rubbed her hands together absent-mindedly.

Natsu blinked a few times, his blank expression that he usually wore immediately returning. "Huh? I did?"

Lucy couldn't help but smile weakly. Natsu had his moments, but he was clueless, and Lucy loved it either way. "Yes, silly. You said I smelled different and that Bickslow smelled like me, and that's because I've been spending time with him lately. I like him." She shrugged.

"…why?" _So Lucy_ does _like Bickslow… what the hell?!_

"Because…" Lucy froze. She didn't actually know the answer and she hadn't really thought about it either. She knew there were already plenty of thinks she liked about him, but none of them were necessarily reasons as to _why_ she did. She had never ever expected to actually have feelings for Bickslow, but it had happened, and she didn't know why. "I don't know."

"How can you not know why you like the guy? Are you sure that you even do?"

"Well… yeah. I've never done this before, but I know that I do like Bickslow. I like him a lot."

Natsu rested his head on Lucy's shoulder as he sighed. "I don't like it." He mumbled. It was the truth. He didn't like that Lucy liked Bickslow, and he didn't like that Bickslow liked Lucy. He didn't really want to accept it, either.

But Lucy didn't lie and he was her best friend. So if she said she liked Bickslow, then she did.

"I know you don't," Lucy said softly, "and I didn't expect you to. But… that being said, I'm only telling you now because you already knew something was going on and I didn't want you to find out on your own and get the wrong idea… but I guess that kind of already happened."

"Are you gonna keep hanging out with him?"

"Yes."

"How long have you been hanging out with him?"

"A few weeks, I guess."

 _A few weeks?! Why didn't I know anything about this earlier?!_ "When he kissed you in the guild…"

Lucy smiled softly, "No, it wasn't the first time."

 _No wonder she wasn't freaking out about it…_ "Alright, fine, but why was he leaving when I got here?"

"I uh… I kind of fell asleep… on him…" Lucy mumbled as she turned her head, blushing slightly. She didn't know why Natsu was asking so many questions, but she was going to answer them all either way. _Questions are better than screaming and jumping to conclusions, right?_

Natsu raised an eyebrow as he lifted his head from her shoulder, noticing the blush across her cheeks, "You fell asleep _on_ Bickslow?" Lucy nodded as she looked down at her hands, "Okay… so why are you in a towel?"

Lucy finally realised that she was still in a towel and she could only assume what Natsu was thinking. Hell, if it had been Erza at her door instead of Natsu, Bickslow would already be dead.

"Because I was about to go and have a bath before you decided to break my coffee table!" She said as she folded her arms.

"So you didn't… you know…"

Lucy gasped. "What? No!" She shrieked, shoving Natsu's shoulder.

"Well, he has a reputation, you know!"

"I know that!"

The room fell into silence for a few moments as they both looked down at the broken coffee table. Neither really knew what to say. Lucy was glad that Natsu wasn't really flipping out, not to mention a little surprised that he even asked whether she'd slept with Bickslow… but to be fair, he did have that kind reputation and Lucy had heard stories. She'd heard Mira complain once when she'd tried setting Bickslow up with someone and he'd decline so Lucy had asked why she had been so irritated by it, so she'd known that Bickslow never dated people long before they'd, well… started dating, sort of.

But Lucy had forgotten that. She didn't need to remember it because at the time, Bickslow was just that guy who was a part of the Raijinshuu and had an interesting personality with even more interesting habits.

That wasn't to say that Bickslow wasn't the same person anymore, because he was; it was just that Lucy began to wonder why they were dating, sort of. He hadn't even tried to sleep with her, and even if he was, it seemed like a lot of effort just to have sex with one person.

So Lucy found herself questioning if Bickslow did actually like her, even though he said he had at the very beginning of it all.

"And it wasn't me who broke the table." Natsu said, the amusement evident in his voice. "Technically it was Bickslow who did."

Lucy laughed airily, "You're the one who pushed him into it."

* * *

When Bickslow walked into the guild a little while later, he quickly made his way over to where Laxus was sitting at their usual table. Evergreen was swatting Elfman with her fan as Mira and Lisanna giggled, and Freed was… well, Bickslow had no idea where Freed was.

"Fuck." Bickslow said quietly as he sat down opposite Laxus, causing the blonde man to raise an eyebrow. "Is it too early to drink yet?"

"Eh? What's with the clothes?" Laxus asked, noticing how Bickslow's hood was down and he was wearing jeans and a sweatshirt rather than his usual get-up.

Bickslow looked down at his own clothes when Laxus brought it up. _Fuck._ _Forgot about that too._ He hadn't actually been to his own home yet; he'd gone straight to the guild and didn't realise he'd left his visor back in Lucy's apartment until he was walking through the main gates.

"Forget the clothes. I fucked up. Where's Freed?"

"Hm? What'd you do this time? Got someone knocked up?" Laxus asked as he smirked before lifting a piece of bacon up to his mouth.

"What? No. Why do you all keep assuming that?" Bickslow leant across the table to snag a piece of bacon from the mountain of it that Laxus had on his plate.

"Because it's a miracle you haven't yet." The Dragon Slayer mumbled, sliding the plate away from the Seith mage, lest he steal any more bacon.

Bickslow considered it as he took a bite from the strip of bacon. It wasn't like Laxus was wrong, because it was actually pretty damn true. But surely, if he ever did manage to get a girl pregnant, surely they'd come and find him, right? It wasn't like there were many people to confuse him with in Magnolia.

But that being said… who would actually want Bickslow to be an actual father? Whether by accident or not?

 _Nah, they'd come find me. Surely. Right?!_

With a shrug, he said, "Eh, true." Shoving the rest of the piece of bacon in his mouth, "Anyway, seen Freed?"

"Nope. I'm only here because he mentioned he found a job, but he hasn't showed up yet."

"Son of a bitch…" Bickslow muttered as he rested his hand in his palm. _Damn it, Freed. You're supposed to be my saviour right now!_

"So what exactly did you do?" Laxus asked as he leant back on the bench, resting his arms over the back of the chair.

"Gi-hi, do tell."

Bickslow turned his head slightly to see Gajeel take a seat next to Laxus on the opposite side of the table, his usual smirk on his face. _Damn it, he's been listening again._ "Kind of… stayed at Lucy's last night." He mumbled, just loud enough for the two Dragon Slayers to hear him.

"Damn. Didn't expect you to be irritated about getting laid."

Bickslow raised his head from his hand, raising his eyebrows as he stared at Gajeel. "Huh? I'm not- I mean, we didn't."

"Really? Then what did you do; sleep?" Laxus chuckled, "Yeah, sure."

"Yes."

"Aren't you two like dating or somethin'?" Gajeel asked as he leant forward, a little shocked to hear that Bickslow could actually spend a night with a girl and not sleep with them.

"Sort of? Kind of? I don't even know. Why does that matter anyway?" _Why does it matter if we're dating – sort of – anyway? Even if we weren't, if she got drunk enough she probably woul- No, Bicks. Stop that train of thought. You don't want to do that that way. But what the hell is Gajeel talking about?!_

"How many dates have you gone on?" Laxus asked.

"Uh… like three, I guess?"

"And you stayed at her place…"

"Where the fuck are you going with this, Laxus?"

Laxus and Gajeel shared a look before they both turned to stare at the Seith mage. "You don't know about the three-date rule?" Gajeel asked as he grinned.

"Rule?" _What the fuck are they talking about?!_

Gajeel shrugged as he leant back on the bench and folded his arms across his chest, "You're supposed to have sex on the third date, you moron."

"The fuck? That's a thing?" _WHAT KIND OF RULE IS THAT?! No, no. No one had any intentions of sleeping together. Apart from actual sleeping, which was an accident._

"I'm surprised you didn't know that." Laxus mumbled.

"Shut up…" Bickslow muttered as he returned his head to his resting position in his palm before he shot up again, looking between the two Dragon Slayers opposite him, "Wait, hang on. Why the fuck should I be listening to you two anyway?"

"Eh?" Gajeel's eyebrow shot up questioningly.

"You," Bickslow gestured to Laxus with his hand, "are possibly the most socially awkward person I know."

"Watch it, Bicks." Laxus warned.

"You know less about dating and everything even related to it than I do, which is saying something." Bickslow turned his head to face Gajeel, "And you; when the fuck are you going to do something about Levy? Jesus Christ, dude. The girl's been in love with you for God knows how long and watching you two avoid it is painful."

"Oi!"

"You know he's right." Laxus chuckled as he picked up another piece of bacon. Gajeel only slouched in the chair as he muttered under his breath about the small Script mage.

Bickslow sat back as he folded his own arms across his chest. "I'm not listening to either of you two when it comes to my relat-"

"Oi, Shrimp. Come over here for a second." Bickslow was cut off as Gajeel turned where he sat, leaning over the back of the chair and towards Levy.

The small bluenette looked up from the book she was reading and removed her gale-force reading glasses, placing them on the table, "Huh?"

Gajeel rolled his eyes, "Just get over here, will ya?"

"I have no idea what's going on right now." Bickslow muttered as he stared at Gajeel and Levy who was getting up from the table next to theirs.

"I was reading up on ancient sym-" Levy was cut off as Gajeel suddenly pulled her in by the waist and into his lap. Her squeal was muffled as Gajeel crashed his lips against hers, and the guild was silent for a moment.

Bickslow and Laxus sat there baffled as everyone in the room turned to watch the Dragon Slayer and the Script mage. Jet and Droy's cries could be heard over the cheering that erupted from the hall, along with Cana's whistle.

Laxus cleared his throat and the two pulled apart. Levy's hands were still laced around Gajeel's neck when she turned at the sound and instantly turned a shade of dark red. Another squeal and she jumped off and ran back to her table, picking up her book and glasses and then hurrying out of the guild.

"Uh… well…" Gajeel looked around the room a few times, then to the doors, and then to Bickslow and then to Laxus with a wide grin, "I gotta go."

Bickslow turned his head over his shoulder as he watched the Iron Dragon Slayer rush out of the guild. "I'm still not listening to you!" He called before Gajeel had left the building. _Damn. Didn't expect that…_

Laxus waited until the guild had returned to normal (or as normal as it's going to get for Fairy Tail) and then turned his attention back to Bickslow. He really just wanted to know how he'd fucked up, and how it involved Lucy. "So what happened with Blondie?"

"Oh, right… that." Bickslow said quietly as he looked down at the table, "Well, as I was leaving this morning, I opened the door to leave her apartment but… Natsu was kind of standing on the other side of the door."

Another piece of bacon went into Laxus' mouth as he smirked slightly. "Damn…"

"Yeah. Damn. Anyway, so Lucy is kind of, well, most likely, telling him right now. About us."

"Seriously?"

"He did already know something was going on though…" Bickslow mumbled. "So if you see him coming in through the doors, can you let me know so I can go and run out the back?"

Laxus scoffed, "No. You got yourself into this mess. Deal with it yourself."

"Ass."

"Yes, but Lucy will talk him out of killing you; especially if she actually does like you."

"Hopefully…" Bickslow mumbled as he rested his head in his palm again. _Hopefully Freed will be here by the time Natsu gets to the guild… if he comes into the guild at all._

* * *

As Natsu and Lucy walked into the guild a little while later, Natsu immediately searched for the Seith mage and grinned wickedly when he saw him sitting with Laxus. Lucy had only told him that he couldn't kill or seriously hurt Bickslow. She said nothing about threatening…

As Natsu veered off to the table and Lucy towards the bar to get breakfast (which was the only reason why they were in the guild that morning anyway), Lucy stopped, "Natsu…" She'd said as a warning.

Natsu looked over his shoulder at his frowning friend, "No killing or hurting, I got it." And he really wasn't going to kill or hurt Bickslow. He already felt bad about punching her sort-of but not-really boyfriend/date (he couldn't understand it since Lucy wouldn't explain it), but he would threaten him.

As Lucy's best friend, that was his job – or so he had decided. He still didn't like that Lucy actually liked Bickslow or that Bickslow liked Lucy (because it was Bickslow, and the guy had a reputation for a reason), but Lucy had so bluntly told him that she didn't care, so he'd have to get over it – without killing someone.

So as Lucy finally went off to see Mira to get something before they left for their job for the day, Natsu made his way over to Laxus and Bickslow. Laxus was smirking when he realised Natsu was coming and Natsu's anger level instantly started rising again. He'd found out that only the other two members of the Thunder God tribe, Laxus, and Gajeel knew, so he was the last to find out among the Dragon Slayers (apart from Wendy). _Damn it, I should have been the first to know!_ He'd told himself earlier.

But he had to remind himself that it wasn't really about him. Lucy didn't want him to tell anyone – including Happy, which he thought sucked because he told his partner everything – so he wasn't going to. He'd keep their secret, but he wouldn't be happy about it. That's just what friends did.

"Yo, Bickslow!" Natsu said rather cheerfully as he sat down on the bench next to Bickslow, placing his arm over the taller man's shoulders.

Bickslow tensed when he felt the heat from the arm through his shirt and the familiar voice. _Oh, fuck…_ _am I about to die? No, no. He wouldn't kill me in the guild._

"Natsu." He said in greeting.

"Hey, where's your visor?"

Bickslow narrowed his eyes as he turned his head to glare at the grinning Fire Dragon Slayer, "You know exactly where it is." He said in a low voice.

"Hm…" Natsu brought his fingers to his chin in mock contemplation before his hand shot up in the air as he grinned again, "Aha! Right here!" He exclaimed as he reached into his pocket and brought out the piece of metal, dropping it on the table in front of Bickslow.

Bickslow's hands instantly scrambled to pick it up from the table, pulling his hood up and clipping it on again. It wasn't like he needed to have it on all the time, but he'd had it for so long it was more of a comfort thing. Sure, he was comfortable enough around certain people and the guild for short periods of time, but he always preferred it; especially at times when he didn't want people to read his emotions, and right then was a prime example. He didn't want Natsu to think he was scared… but he probably already knew. "Thanks…" He mumbled.

"Anyway…" Natsu's arm went back around Bickslow's shoulders as he leant in, lowering his voice, "If you fuck with Lucy or hurt her, I'll burn that guild mark off and then make your life a living hell for as long as you live."

"I…" Bickslow's throat felt dry as he tried to form his response and he found himself wishing that he was being killed or at least beat up by Natsu. He didn't think a threat could be so terrifying, but then again, it was from Natsu and it had something to do with Lucy. He realised he should have expected something like that from the Dragon Slayer. "I wasn't planning to." He finally said quietly.

Natsu sat back up straight as he grinned, "Good!" He stood up as his arms folded behind his head and turned towards the bar, "See you around, Bickslow." He said over his shoulder as he continued smirking.

"You do realise you basically just got permission from Natsu to actually date her, right? That's as good as it's going to get." Laxus murmured as he turned to look at Bickslow who looked a little dazed and confused.

"Huh…" Bickslow said as he stared at the table. He realised Laxus was right; Natsu hadn't killed him and he didn't freak out and do something crazy like Bickslow had sort of expected, which meant Lucy had at least talked him down from it and that was a good thing.

 _Because it means she actually does like me – well, enough to save me from Natsu._

Even though he had more or less received the Dragon Slayer's 'blessing' to continue seeing Lucy, he was still terrified of him.

But despite being terrified, he couldn't stop the grin that would become plastered on his face as he leant back against the back of the chair, folding his arms across his chest once again.

Lucy liked him enough to keep Natsu from killing him, and that made him incredibly happy.

* * *

 **Okay... so... I'll explain where Happy was in the next chapter and why I'm not having him find out from Natsu (he'll find out soon on his own).**  
 **Also, the GaLe/Gajevy moment... yeah, well. That happened. I wanted them paired, and I thought it was fun. In my head, Gajeel was more or less like, 'well, fuck it,' and yeah. GaLe!**

 **I was hoping to get this chapter out a little earlier in the week, too, but... eh, I was working on A Peculiar Situation for a couple of days and then this was giving me problems.**

 **This one is probably also way more OOC than the rest (especially the whole Natsu not going on a rampage), but... that's just what happened.**

 **\- April**


	16. Chapter 16

**Okay, really short chapter and I apologise for not having this up sooner. From this point forward, I'll just get up chapters, well... when they get up. Uni starts next week and I've already busy from getting everything organised so yeah, sorry.**

 **As always, I hope it's okay!**

* * *

Natsu hadn't brought up the whole Lucy-possibly-dating-Bickslow thing since they'd left the guild for their job and neither had Lucy. For a while, things were just normal again and they both relished that fact. But as they walked along the crowded street in the late afternoon, the sky having already been tinted with orange and pink hues, Natsu had one more question to ask.

"You're not gonna leave the team, right?" He asked as he walked alongside the blonde, his arms folded behind his head.

Lucy looked up suddenly, "What? Of course not!" She replied. _How could Natsu think I would?_ "I'd never even think about leaving." She finished with a smile.

"Good!" Natsu exclaimed as his mouth broke out into a grin. The team just wouldn't be the same without his blonde friend, and everyone knew that.

As the guild building atop the hill came into the sight, Lucy once again found herself thinking about how well (surprisingly) Natsu had taken everything. He had asked questions and he had listened to everything Lucy had said. Sure, he'd made it apparent he didn't like it, but he'd put that aside. He'd put his newfound hatred for the Seith mage aside because of Lucy.

He hadn't hurt him in any way (albeit Natsu knew he had terrified the guy) because of Lucy, and she was glad for that. Lucy honestly thought telling Natsu would be the end of the world, but it wasn't all that bad. Natsu had surprised her.

As the two walked into the guildhall a little while later, Natsu and Lucy instantly went over to where Happy was sitting atop the table with Carla, Wendy, and Gray.

"Hey, Happy!" Natsu called with his usual grin as he took a seat opposite Gray. "Ready to go fishing?"

Lucy sat down next to the pinkette, remembering how her day had been strangely quiet; no 'aye' or tongue rolling from the blue Exceed every few minutes. Not to mention the constant comments on the blonde's weight, which she really did think were only said because Happy knew it pissed her off. _Eh, he's a cat. What can you expect?_

"You're going fishing?" Lucy asked as she raised an eyebrow slightly, "Isn't it a bit late?"

"Nope!" Natsu said with a laugh as he stood up, "Come on, Happy!"

"Aye!"

Carla sighed loudly as Happy and Natsu finally disappeared through the doors, causing Wendy to chuckle nervously. "About time he goes away." Carla muttered.

Lucy smiled slightly. It wasn't a secret that Happy had a habit of hanging around Carla whenever he could because he liked the white Exceed, but Carla, well… she didn't like him as much. Lucy had asked Natsu where Happy had been before they left her apartment for the guild that morning and Natsu had seemed a little disappointed his partner had ditched him for Carla for the day. He was a cat, so he was allowed to hang out in the female dorms all day.

So as Natsu and Happy made their way out of the bustling town in the early evening and into the quiet forest on the outskirts of Magnolia, the blue Exceed smiled devilishly as his head turned towards Natsu, continuing their walk. "So did you talk to Lucy?" He asked.

Natsu sighed as his arms folded behind his head again. Lucy had made him promise not to tell Happy about her and Bickslow, and as much as it hurt him to lie to his other best friend and partner in crime, he would do so. "Yeah." He said quietly.

"So does she like Bickslow?" Happy asked as he flew to sit down on the edge of the pond. He had been there in Hargeon when Natsu had originally asked if she had liked Bickslow, so Happy was still a little behind when it came to Lucy's love life (or lack thereof for the most part). That being said, he wasn't as dense as Natsu was when it came to most things, so the blue Exceed had already figured there was something going on.

Natsu cackled as he sat down next to Happy. "Nope."

* * *

The end of the week came around fairly quickly. Lucy had spent her time divided between sitting in the guild with the rest of her team and sitting at her desk at home, constantly throwing crumpled up pieces of paper to a wall or the floor behind her. She had her rent covered for the next two months so there was no need to go out on any jobs for the time being, plus, she really needed to work on her book (and it was a nice way to kill time when she didn't have much else to do).

Bickslow, on the other hand, spent most of the week with his team in Clover after Freed had eventually graced them all with his presence later on Sunday morning.

But it was now late Friday morning and Bickslow found himself staring at the request board near the guild doors. Well, not so much the board itself; it was the blonde who was standing in front of it and had been doing so for the last five minutes.

He found himself debating if he should go and talk to her, much like he had the previous day when he spent his afternoon in the guild drinking way too much as usual, but every time he'd looked over in that direction, Natsu had sent him a look that really just made him want to run away, and far away at that. But he remembered what Laxus had said on Sunday; that he basically had permission from the pink-haired Dragon Slayer to continue dating her.

But then again, why should he believe what Laxus said? The guy was the definition of anti-social and it wasn't like he had any experience with relationships and dating either.

 _Fuck it_ , Bickslow thought as he looked towards the board once again. _You missed your chance to do so yesterday, so do it now. I mean, what's the worst that could happen?_

The Seith mage rose from where he sat, "Going to go find a job." Bickslow mumbled.

Freed looked up from his Level 2 Rune Shorthand Examination book he had been reading, sending a curious glance in Bickslow's direction. "But we just got back the other day…?" He said quietly. Freed was a little confused – Bickslow rarely chose the jobs they went on. It was more of a case of him saying 'sure, whatever' or 'fuck off, that's a stupid job' to any that himself, Evergreen, or Laxus suggested. Mostly the former though.

"He's not looking for a job." Laxus mumbled as he turned his head to look at the request board near the doors.

"Huh?" Freed turned in his seat to look towards the board, placing his book back on the table. "Oh…" He said quietly when he finally understood.

Bickslow stood between Lucy and Nab at the board. He looked towards Nab out of the corner of his eye. He had to find a way to get rid of the guy before he could even think about talking to Lucy. So as Lucy continued looking over the requests – much like Nab who was still looking for a job that only he could do, Bickslow skimmed over a few of the requests in front of him.

 _Dark guild, dark guild, bandits, security, find a lost object, blah blah blah. None of these are good._

And then one caught his attention. Bickslow pulled it from where it was stuck at the top of the board and thrust it into Nab's vision. He hadn't actually read it all – something about a wild animal, blah blah blah. Right up Nab's alley, right? "This one seems like it would be your kind of job." He said quietly as Nab took the request flyer from his hand, reading it carefully.

Lucy's eyes went wide when Nab's face suddenly lit up and he lifted the flyer into the air, staring up at it with a wide grin.

"Yes!" Nab exclaimed as he turned to face Bickslow, "This is it! This is the one!" He said as he moved to wrap his arms around Bickslow, "Thank you, Bickslow!"

Bickslow laughed as he pat the man on the back before pushing him off of him, "Alright, alright. Just go already."

"Of course, of course." Nab said as he looked towards the flyer once again before turning to face the bar, "I'm going out on a job!" He yelled over everyone in the hall before running through the doors and out into Magnolia. A few cheers erupted in the hall, as well as a few people shouting 'about fucking time' or 'have fun'.

"What was that about?" Lucy muttered as she turned to look at the requests again – because really, she didn't understand what had happened. _Was Nab really going out on a job?_

Bickslow shrugged as his head turned to look down at the blonde before reverting back to the board. He couldn't make it seem like he was there to talk to her. No, he had to make it seem like a conversation because they were discussing jobs or something. People in the guild did that, right? He didn't really know.

"You wouldn't understand. It's a Seith bromance thing." He finally said quietly.

Lucy raised an eyebrow, "'Seith bromance?' Wait, Nab uses Seith magic?" Lucy had always wondered what type of magic Nab had used, but she never expected Seith magic.

"Yup."

"Huh… I never would have guessed that." She continued looking up at the numerous flyers that littered the board, trying to find something suitable for the afternoon she had promised to spend with Asuka and Natsu. "So is he a glorified puppeteer too?" She asked quietly as a smirk played on her lips.

Bickslow couldn't help but break out into laughter, warranting a few questioning glances from people around the hall (Natsu included). "No," He managed to choke out. Then, as he got a hold on his laughter and quieted down again, he said, "It's not the same. Different forms of Seith magic."

"Right…"

"Anyway…" Bickslow glanced over his shoulder, instantly tensing when he saw Natsu's cold (surprisingly) glare from where he sat with the rest of his team. Bickslow wouldn't have been surprised if Natsu was listening to their conversation. With a slight smirk, he turned back to the board, looking at the blonde from the corner of his eye. "Doing anything tonight?" He asked quietly.

"Not tonight, no." She smiled slightly when she found the perfect job for the afternoon before reaching up to pull it down from the board, examining it more as she brought it closer to her face.

"Dinner, then?"

"Sure. Pick me up at 7?" She asked as she stepped away from the board, turning to head back onto the main floor of the guild.

Bickslow nodded as he continued to look up at the requests, not actually reading any of them. "7 it is."

So as Bickslow remained at the board and Lucy presumably went to sit with the rest of her team once again, it occurred to Bickslow that he hadn't really thought about the plans for that night. Hell, he hadn't actually planned on asking her to dinner again; he'd just wanted to talk to her.

But dinner was okay. Dinner was fine.

He just didn't know where dinner would be, because he hadn't thought that far ahead. So after waiting a somewhat reasonable amount of time to not draw any suspicion to himself, he turned and headed out into the Magnolia again. He had to find a restaurant, and that was going to prove to be difficult, he realised.

He knew where every single bar and strip club was, but not nearly as many of the restaurants that littered the town.

 _Damn it. This is hard._

* * *

 **Next chapter is longer, I promise. But again, I have no idea when it will be up.**

 **\- April**


	17. Chapter 17

**Ahhh, yay for longer chapters! Honestly, this chapter was going to be twice as long but when I saw the length, I realised I needed to split them up so I'll get to work on that next week maybe.**

 **As usual, thank you guys for the reviews that always make me chuckle a little bit in the morning.**

 **Anyway, I started uni yesterday so I've been incredibly tired over the last couple of days. Tuesday is an incredibly long day for me, class and transport wise (about 12 hours, so that kinda sucks), and it's Tuesday night here so I apologise if there's any errors with this! I can guarantee there's mistakes I've missed, but I wanted to get this chapter up tonight so I shall re-read it tomorrow morning before I head off to uni and update it then.**

 **That being said, I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

Unlike the first time, Bickslow was running late to picking Lucy up. Well, sort of. He'd made the reservations at the restaurant for 7PM by mistake and he was supposed to be picking her up at the exact same time. It wouldn't have been a problem if the restaurant didn't happen to be a twenty-minute walk away.

So as he climbed the stairs to her third floor apartment, three steps at a time, he glanced over at the clock that hung on the wall. 6:48pm it read, and Bickslow realised he'd screwed up. The five wooden dolls that housed the souls in his possession were hovering behind him, actually silent for once. He hadn't planned on using his babies for transportation purposes with Lucy – ever. Well, at least not for a while, but to get to the restaurant in time, he'd have to. He just hoped she'd take it well and not freak out, which was entirely possible.

He knocked on the door three times and waited for the blonde to open the door, which she did a few seconds later and he couldn't stop the smile that spread across his face. Whenever he saw her and was actually able to talk to her, he was overcome by a sense of happiness. In the few short weeks they'd been, well, sort of dating, seeing Lucy had quickly become on the best parts of his week, if not the thing he looked forward to the most.

"Hey," Bickslow said almost breathlessly as he looked her up and down; the dark teal dress that hugged her in every right way and made Bickslow wonder how she didn't constantly have guys hitting on her and falling for her. Then again, it was entirely possibly she did and she just ignored it or they did so discretely. Bickslow never really paid much attention to it, really.

"Hey," Lucy replied with a smile as she pulled the door closed behind her after grabbing her bag and heels from where they sat next to the small table just inside her apartment.

Bickslow stepped back, giving her room as she bent down to put on the grey pumps. He raised an eyebrow when she straightened up as he looked up from the shoes, "Damn, do you think you're tall enough now?" He said, his voice hinting at his amusement.

"Well…" She said quietly as she stepped closer to Bickslow, seeing just how much the heels had raised her up, "If you didn't make me feel like such a dwarf when I'm around you, then I wouldn't have to wear 5-inch heels."

"Dwarf! Dwarf!" A few of Bickslow's babies chanted, making Lucy giggle slightly.

Bickslow rolled his eyes as his hands went to her waist, smoothing over the loose ruffles as he lowered his head (considerably less than usual) to kiss her gently. "Maybe you should wear heels more often." He whispered as she pushed back on his chest slightly.

"Hmm. Just for that I'm considering not wearing them."

"Well, you can consider that another time," He said with a smirk as he glanced at the clock for a second and then back down to the blonde, "because we really should be going now."

So as the two made their way downstairs (albeit Lucy a little slower on the stairs part. She was never really fond of stairs when wearing heels) out into the dimly lit street her building was situated on, Bickslow stopped just outside the main door to her building and in front of the canal.

"Okay, kind of a weird question," He started, causing the blonde to turn around before she could step onto the ledge of the canal. "Do you, uh… trust me?" He asked, meeting her questioning gaze.

Lucy tilted her head as she walked towards Bickslow slowly. _What kind of question is that?_ "Why?" She asked back.

"Just… yes or no." Bickslow said firmly. A small part of him didn't like himself for pressing the issue, but he needed to know if she did. He didn't think he'd given her a reason not to trust him – well, lately, anyway; but it was still entirely possible she didn't. Hell, he wouldn't trust himself if he were her.

After a few seconds, Lucy slowly nodded her head, and with a shrug she said quietly: "I suppose, but why do you ask?" And it was the truth. She did trust Bickslow, but she'd had to think about it and she didn't like that fact. She'd never really had to think about whether she trusted someone, but then again no one had ever asked if she trusted them. It wasn't like she had been in an internal argument with herself over whether she did actually trust the man or not because she had no reason not to, but regardless of that fact, she was suddenly a little worried about why he had asked.

Bickslow waited a few moments, trying to read her expression. "Are you sure?" He asked. He had to make sure _she_ was sure. He needed her to trust him enough to feel safe.

"Yes, of course I am. Until you give me a reason not to, I'm going to trust you," She said as she narrowed her eyes slightly. "Now tell me why you wanted to know this. Please."

 _Ah, fuck. You shouldn't have pushed it_ , Bickslow told himself. _Now she's mad. Good job._ Bickslow knew Lucy didn't lie – that was one thing he'd always known. If she said something, she meant it, but he still needed to know; to hear her actually say it, because after all, trust was important.

Bickslow quickly bent down, one arm going behind her legs as the other went behind her back and lifted her up as she made a sound that resembled a squeal. "What are you doing?!" She said frantically as she looked down to see all his babies lined up and hovering just above the ground.

"Uh, well… remember how I said we had to get going now?" He asked as he stepped up, pulling Lucy closer as he did so and smiling slightly when her arms wrapped around his neck to pull herself up more and shifting slightly in his arms. She nodded as she looked down again, seeing the ground slowly get further and further away as they rose into the air. "I might have accidentally made the reservations for 7pm and the place is like a twenty-minute walk from here…"

Lucy thought for a moment as she looked down at all of the rooves of the buildings they were passing over. She understood then why Bickslow had felt the need to ask if she trusted him – he'd needed to know if she trusted him enough to do _that_. She started laughing quietly as she realised this, causing Bickslow to look down with his own smirk.

"What are you laughing about now?" He asked as he held back his own laughter – something about her laughing was incredibly contagious, but he wasn't complaining.

"You know, I'm using to 'flying', so to speak."

Lucy watched as he tried to figure out what she'd meant by it, waiting for the moment when he realised just how silly the entire thing had been. It had taken Bickslow a few seconds, and then when he did, he groaned as his head went back before he started laughing, mostly at himself. _You're a fucking moron, Bicks,_ he told himself. Of course she'd have no issues with transportation via, well… the babies. If she trusted a damn flying cat, then it would be a no-brainer that she'd trust him with essentially the same thing. "Of course you are."

* * *

Bickslow and Lucy found themselves aimlessly walking throughout the dark streets of Magnolia at a little past 9PM. The restaurant closed at 9PM and they'd among the few remaining diners to be pushed out the doors as the owner locked up for the night.

Lucy didn't seem to mind that the restaurant had closed, but Bickslow had made his confusion and frustration evident with his protests. He didn't understand why the place had closed so early – despite Lucy telling him that it really wasn't that early, but then again Bickslow usually frequented places that were open until the early hours of the morning that generally held no class.

But a two-hour dinner date wasn't long enough for either of them, especially when they hadn't talked for basically a week.

"So what do you want to do now?" Bickslow asked as they continued walking at their slow pace, drawing out their time together if the night were to come to an end after two hours.

Lucy shrugged as she looked down at cobblestone path. She didn't know what she wanted to do. She didn't know what there was to do at 9PM. The majority of places were closed, bar the numerous clubs and pubs that sat on almost every street; but those kind of places weren't really her scene, so those were out of the question. Lucy only knew that she didn't want to go back home just yet.

But then she remembered something – she'd never actually seen Bickslow's apartment. Well, she had, but she'd only seen his bedroom and she hadn't paid too much attention to it since she was mostly too busy trying to run out of there at the time. She knew they were heading in that general direction despite not remembering his exact building –just the street– because her apartment was in the same direction.

Bickslow had seen her apartment; hell, he'd stayed the night because she'd fallen asleep on him (again), so it was only fair she got to see his apartment. Right?

"Can I see your apartment?" She asked as she looked up.

He looked down in slight shock, not expecting the question at all. "You've already seen it, haven't you?"

She shrugged again, "Technically, yes, but only for a few minutes so I didn't really see any of it."

Bickslow thought it over for a moment. It wasn't like he had anything to hide in his apartment because in reality, he didn't do much in it other than sleep, shower, occasionally get drunk, or, well, fuck. The only reason the place had the amount of furniture and random junk in it that it did was because Evergreen had decided he needed to live in a place that was 'lavishly decorated', just to give the illusion he actually spent time there. That, and he needed somewhere to store the countless books Freed had given him as gifts over the years.

But it would only be fair that Lucy see his place since he'd seen hers the week before. So with a shrug, he looked down again, "Fair enough." He said as he laced his fingers through hers and pulled her down a slightly darker and narrower street. "So anyway, I forgot to ask earlier…" He started, lowing his voice slightly.

"Ask what?" Lucy wondered what it was he could possibly ask. Their conversation topics over dinner had covered everything from the week and the job Bickslow had gone on, to Lucy finding out that Levy had most likely run off with Gajeel somewhere since nobody had heard from the two of them. When she'd heard it, she had been a little surprised, but not all that much, really. She did, however, find it interesting that Bickslow was taking credit for their 'getting together', but he wouldn't elaborate on how he had done it, only saying he'd said something and the next thing he knew, Levy was sitting on Gajeel's lap opposite him and making out in the middle of the guild.

But that aside, she didn't know what Bickslow could possibly ask. He tended to ask some weird things, she noticed.

"Well… How's Natsu with this…like, us, I mean." He asked quietly as he turned his head away in an attempt to hide his blush. He'd just referred to them as an 'us' and he didn't know if that was the right thing to do. Hell, he didn't really know if it was an 'us' kind of thing because all he knew was that they were sort of, kind of dating.

Lucy giggled as he turned his head away. She couldn't remember ever seeing his face being even close to any shade of pink or red. A part of her didn't even think it was possible for the guy to get embarrassed or feel awkward enough to blush, but it had happened over calling themselves an 'us', and at that moment, she'd felt her heart beat just a tiny bit faster. "I saw that." She choked out over laughter.

"It's dark; you didn't see anything." Bickslow mumbled as he led them down the street his building was on. He was thankful a few of the lamps that lined the street hadn't been working for a week and a half, just so she couldn't see the God damn blush that was refusing to leave. _What is this, Bicks?! You don't blush. Ever,_ he told himself.

"It's not that dark." She laughed again she looked around the street as they walked, seeing the slightly familiar surroundings. "But…" She said quietly, all hints of laughter gone, "Natsu doesn't like _us_ …"

"Now you're just mocking me." He mumbled, although Bickslow did have to admit that hearing Lucy refer to themselves as an 'us' – whether it was just to mock him or not – did have a certain ring to it.

"But… he knows I don't really care what he thinks about _us_." Lucy smirked as she put emphasis on the 'us' again before she pulled them to a stop. "But it does sound kind of nice." She mused.

"What does?" He asked as he glanced up over her head to see his building behind her before going back down again and meeting her gaze.

"'Us'."

He flashed a grin at the sight of her slight blush he could just make out. There she was, basically saying the exact same thing he'd been thinking just before and he could only wonder just how she'd done it. It wasn't the first time it had happened either. The first time was when they were on the train heading towards the job they had been put on and he hadn't thought much about it at the time, but since then, it had happened a few times and it was, well… he thought it was a little weird how she'd somehow be able to say exactly what he had been thinking.

But he didn't care that it was weird, because it wasn't the fact she was able to do it that mattered at that moment. In that moment, it was what she had _said_ that mattered.

So as he lowered his head, his mouth just a hair's breadth from hers, he whispered, each syllable causing his lips to brush against hers, "It does."

* * *

The first thing Lucy had done when Bickslow had pushed the door to his apartment open was kick off her heels right next to the door, making Bickslow chuckle as he disappeared down the short hall where Lucy remembered his bedroom to be. But her feet were killing her. It wasn't like she hated wearing heels, because she loved them just as much as she loved her boots; it was just the fact she rarely wore ones _that_ high.

Bickslow's apartment, in Lucy's opinion, was somehow simultaneously so his, yet at the same time, it didn't seem like it was his apartment. The sleek furnishings – black leather lounge and the dark wood coffee table above the grey fur rug, not to mention the glass and dark-wood dining table and the white stools at the breakfast bar. All of that, Lucy saw as being his kind of thing.

It was the wall of books and the desk in the corner that surprised her. Floor-to-ceiling bookcases filled with countless, if not hundreds of books of all genres and sizes. She'd never pegged Bickslow as the type to read, but that being said, she was still learning things about the man.

She walked along the bookshelf, her finger tracing over the spines of the books as she read the names. Some of the books were some of her absolute favourites, while others she had never heard of it and they either looked too 'out there' for her liking or they actually looked decent.

Bickslow emerged from his bedroom shortly after, his jacket off and his shirt un-tucked. He watched Lucy from his kitchen as he filled up a glass with water. "Do you want anything?" He asked from the kitchen.

"No thank you," Lucy said as she looked over her shoulder and then back to the books, continuing with tracing her finger along each of them. "Hey, I didn't know you read."

"I don't." He replied as he moved to stand next to her at the bookshelf, folding his arms across his chest.

"So why do you have so many books…?"

"Freed." Bickslow said simply. "He's been trying to get me 'more literarily inclined' or something like that for years."

She pulled one of the books down and began to flick through the pages slowly, skimming over a few lines here and there. "This one is really good," Lucy mumbled, "It's one of my favourites, actually."

"Never read it." Bickslow mumbled in response, watching as she placed the book back on the shelf and moved over to the desk in the corner and picked up a heavier book – a book on Seith magic.

And then she took the book and went and sat on the lounge with her back against the side armrest.

"You're actually going to read that?" Bickslow asked as he raised an eyebrow. He was still a little confused as to why she'd picked the book up in the first place. It wasn't an interesting book; hell, he thought it was possibly the most boring book he'd ever opened.

She nodded, "Mmhmm. I want to know more about it…" She said quietly as she looked down into the book, hiding her slight blush. It wasn't like she couldn't just go to the guild library and read any of the books on Seith magic there, because she could. She'd be lying to say she wasn't incredibly interested about it too, because she wanted to know more about Bickslow, and by extension, that meant getting to know what kind of magic he used.

But if she wanted to find out more about Seith magic, then Bickslow wasn't going to stop her. He would let her sit there until four o'clock in the morning reading it if she really wanted to and he wouldn't really care whether it would be spent in complete silence because regardless, it would be more time he'd be able to spend with her, and that's what he cared about.

* * *

So she read, and she didn't know she had been reading for so long until she started yawning and Bickslow took the book away from her. She reached into her purse on the coffee table and let her fingers ghost over Horologium's key, telling her that it was a little past midnight.

Lucy stood up from the lounge and swung the strap of her bag over her shoulder and walked over the door slowly, picking up her heels in one hand.

"Well…" She said quietly, walking back over to the lounge.

"Well…" Bickslow echoed as he pushed himself up to lean on his elbows on the lounge.

"Well… it's late, so I should probably… go…" Lucy said quietly and slowly, honestly just trying to draw out her time there – with Bickslow, and… well, the book.

Bickslow held his eyes closed for a moment as he pushed himself up further to lean back on his hands. He didn't want her to leave, that was for sure. "Or… you could stay…" He said quickly, barely a whisper.

"What? I…" Lucy started, her eyes downcast, staring at the rug beneath her feet. _Did he just invite me to stay the night…?_ And then she found herself wondering again if it was because he had, well… ulterior motives. She wasn't ready for that. Not at all. But she didn't really want to believe that that was all he was after, either. With her face as dark as Erza's hair, she looked around at the room (anywhere but Bickslow) while her eyes remained slightly downcast. "I… I'm not…" She stuttered, not being able to form an actual sentence.

Bickslow had to stop himself from slamming the book against his forehead repeatedly. He still didn't understand the conventions of dating, but based on what Gajeel and Laxus had said about the oh so stupid (in Bickslow's opinion) third-date rule, he could only guess that by saying Lucy could stay, he'd made it seem like he wanted to sleep with her.

But it wasn't like he didn't want to, because he did, and he had wanted to for a long while. She was Lucy Heartfilia for God's sake – half of the guild probably wanted to sleep with her (Laxus included, at a time). Despite that, Bickslow honestly didn't give a fuck whether he had sex with Lucy Heartfilia or not, he really didn't.

The problem was that Lucy didn't know that, and as Bickslow watched her struggle with her words and take a single step back, he knew that. _God, you're an absolute moron, Bicks._

Bickslow scrambled up from the lounge and moved to stand before her, back to towering over her since she wasn't wearing her shoes. His hands brushed down her arms before they came to rest just below her elbows as she lifted her head, still not looking directly at him. "I'm sorry," He said softly before tilting his own head down to rest his forehead against hers. "It was just a thought."

Lucy sighed, "I know, I just… I've never…" _Oh, you know. Just never had sex with a guy, let alone date one. Yeah, say that and you probably never will, you idiot,_ her inner voice screamed at her.

"I know," And Bickslow did know, even without her saying it. By his reasoning, it was pretty safe to assume she was a virgin considering _he'd_ been her first kiss (something he had to admit he was pretty happy about in his own weird way), so he knew that it was extremely likely she didn't want to have sex with him (yet, he had to hope), and that was okay, because Bickslow didn't care. "But I only meant actual sleeping. And talking. Or whatever. Mostly sleeping."

 _Actual sleeping. He meant just sleeping and you automatically just assume it was just his reputation speaking for himself. God, I'm such an idiot._

And in a way, Lucy was a little surprised, but at the same time, Bickslow had proved to be full of surprises; he was a man shrouded in mystery, or, as her author's mind like to put it: his true self was hidden behind a mask (something which Lucy thought was pretty darn accurate considering his usual visor get-up).

But she thought about actually staying the night. At Bickslow's apartment. With Bickslow.

It wasn't like she hadn't spent the night with the man before, because she had. Granted, they'd all been mostly accidental (the hotel scenario a few weeks prior was just something else entirely), but they hadn't been terrible. She had to admit, he was a surprisingly good human pillow.

And spending the night with Bickslow, well… it would be a step forward, right?

So after a few moments of silence, she finally lifted her eyes to meet Bickslow's (the ones that she was finding she couldn't get enough of seeing like that), "…Just sleeping?" Lucy asked quietly.

"Just sleeping." Bickslow answered with a grin, knowing that she'd decided to stay, and that, he couldn't help but be happy about. Steps forward.

Before Lucy could even move to get past Bickslow and go back to sitting on the lounge with the book on Seith magic, he had bent down just enough to wrap an arm around her waist to throw her over his shoulder while one arm held the back of her legs.

"Hey! What… what are you doing?!" Lucy squealed in surprise as she dropped her shoes before clinging to the fabric at the back of his shirt. "Put me down!"

"Nope." Bickslow said as he chuckled before heading towards the kitchen and the short hall just next to it.

"Wait! Wait. Stop." Lucy said as she lifted herself up slightly, one arm still grasping his shirt as the other held on to the wall, stopping them before he got too far.

Bickslow tiled his head back. "What?"

"I have one condition." She said flatly, though Bickslow could swear he saw a slight smirk.

So he smirked back. "And that is…" He drawled.

"I get to read more."

Bickslow rolled his eyes as he began walking backwards, only turning when he nearly tripped over one of the heels that Lucy had dropped. He really didn't understand what her fascination with the book was, but he wasn't going to argue. He'd only taken it off her in the first place because he'd gotten bored of watching her yawn. Hell, it was making _him_ tired. But that didn't stop her from obviously wanted to read for God knows how many hours more, but Bickslow was still going to let her sit there and read it for however long she liked.

So when he almost begrudgingly lowered her to the ground, throwing the book towards the centre of the bed before he did so, he remembered that he'd wondered what she'd look like in one of his shirts, because let's face it, he really liked seeing her wrap herself up in his cloak. Bickslow laughed as he turned to look at where she was standing next to the door, once again wrapping herself up in the cloak that had been hanging on the back of the door, the fur trim brushing up against her nose. "You good there?" He said with a grin.

"Mmhmm!" She nodded, smiling into it and enjoying the warmth.

He went over the drawers, opening up one of them as he turned his head over his shoulder, "Are you fine with a shirt?"

"If it smells like you, then yes." She blurted out without thinking, instantly feeling her face heat up and wanting to hide under the cloak forever.

 _If it smells like me?! Oh, whatever, just go with it._ "Alrighty then…" Bickslow mumbled with a chuckle as he rifled through his clothes before pulling out a light grey shirt and tossing towards the blonde. "Bathroom is just behind you so you can change in there." He said, pointing at the door just to the side of her.

When Lucy came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, holding the hem of the shirt down by her thighs as she kneeled on the bed. "A Fairy Tail shirt, really?" She said, slightly amused by his choice of shirt for her to wear.

Bickslow shrugged with a slight smirk as she crawled onto the bed more, crossing her legs under her as she opened up the book again and placed it on the bed just in front of her. "So now you're going to ignore me for that book?" He said as he rolled onto his side, propping his head up in his hand.

Lucy leant forward, her elbows resting on her knees and on top of the blanket. "Maybe." She said, reaching down to turn the page.

"So you're more interested in a book than me?" He said as he tried his best to sound hurt, even though he couldn't stop smiling.

Lucy looked towards Bickslow from the corner of her eyes, seeing the slight smirk before returning to the book in front of her. She knew he didn't care much (although she could tell he was trying to act like he did). But it wasn't like she was going to ignore him, not intentionally, anyway, so she'd just go along with it for the time being. "Yes." She said flatly.

"Noted." He chuckled.

* * *

"That's pretty cool." Lucy mumbled as she turned the page, yawning slightly.

"What is?" Bickslow asked, pressing the side of his head into a different spot on the pillow.

"You can put the souls you control into pretty much any object or thing as long as they're not living or exceptionally heavy."

"I know." He replied with a lazy smirk before putting one of said souls into the book on the bed, lifting it up and making it hover just out of her reach.

"Hey!" She whined, moving to kneel where she had been sitting to try and pull the book back down, only to have it move higher and completely out of her reach. "Show-off." She mumbled, sitting back down and folding her arms.

Bickslow chuckled quietly. "Come here," He mumbled, moving his arm to pull the blonde down and into him before pulling the blanket up higher. "You know, I never thanked you." He said quietly as he wrapped an arm around her and pressed a light kiss against her cheek.

"For what?"

"For keeping Natsu from killing me." Because really, Bickslow figured she'd had to have at least talked him down from it (for the time being) and that was definitely something to be thankful for.

Lucy smiled as she rolled more onto her side, one finger lightly trailing down Bickslow's chest before she dropped it to rest on the mattress. "You're very welcome." She said with a slight giggle before leaning in and pressing her lips to his.

Bickslow pulled her tighter against him as she kissed him. He could feel her hand come to rest lightly on the side of the jaw as he rolled her onto her back, partly leaning over her. He didn't know what it was, but every time he touched her or held her, he didn't want to let her go; every kiss that he never wanted to end. He couldn't get enough of _her_ , and he didn't understand how he'd got to that point so quickly. The best part to Bickslow was that he didn't have to try and stop himself; to tell himself he can't sate what was well on its way to becoming an addiction, because if Lucy had shown any sign that she didn't want any of it, that she didn't want him, then he would have stopped in a heartbeat.

But she wasn't and she hadn't.

Internally, a very big part of Lucy was screaming at herself; telling her she shouldn't really be there with Bickslow, especially in his bed. But, she was blocking it out. She knew she wanted to be there, with Bickslow, in his bed, reading about Seith magic. More than anything, she wanted the voice inside her head to just go away once and for all, because she liked Bickslow. A lot. She liked spending time with Bickslow, she liked getting to know the enigma that he was, and hell, she liked kissing him. _A lot_. And fuck, did she _really_ like his tongue in her mouth. That was something she still didn't understand.

"Biiiiiicks." She sang almost breathlessly as she pulled her head back, her fingers still tracing lightly over his jaw.

Bickslow smirked briefly before kissing the side of her jaw for just a second. "You want the book back, don't you?"

"Yup." She noddled with a slight giggle before rolling over as she caught the book drop down to the bed beside her out of the corner of her vision.

Bickslow propped himself up on his elbow, looking over her shoulder as she flipped through the pages. "Why do you want to read it so much?"

"Because it's interesting," She said simply. "And I want to learn more about your magic. Do you have a problem with that?" She said, turning her head over her shoulder slightly to see the slightly confused expression on Bickslow's face.

And he really was a little confused. For most people, when it came to Seith magic, they generally didn't bother to learn about it; partly due to its complexity, just because of the nature of Seith magic. But Lucy didn't seem to care about either of those. She wanted to know more, and by extension, that meant she wanted to know more about him. Bickslow was fine with that.

So after a moment's pause, he lowered his chin to rest against her shoulder before he whispered, "Nope. Carry on."

So Lucy did the same as before; she read silently (for the most part), occasionally getting Bickslow to explain a concept that she didn't quite understand. And in a way, she was glad he was fine with her learning more about it. She understood that everyone had their secrets, and for some people that was their magic, but Bickslow wasn't one of those.

As his nose brushed against the side of her neck before lightly kissing the spot just behind and below her ear, making her shiver slightly the first time he'd done so, he looked over her shoulder again. "What are you reading about now?" He asked. Bickslow had seen her occasionally skip complete chapters, or sections of them, apparently not interested enough in it (which Bickslow wasn't surprised about, because really, half of the stuff in that book was just the ramblings of the author).

"Figure Eyes." She mumbled, already too lost in the chapter. It was the aspect she was most intrigued about. Lucy had only see him use it once - hell, he tried to use it _on_ her, so she didn't know all that much about it. Nothing at all, really.

He tensed at the mention of it, subconsciously pulling her in a tad closer. It was the aspect that was the most misunderstood, and there was a good reason for it. Bickslow knew that better than anyone. He didn't like having to use that part of his magic and he rarely did.

And Lucy felt him pull her in just a little bit closer and she briefly wondered if she should just close the book and call it a night, but she knew she couldn't. Lucy knew there were misconceptions in regards to that aspect of his magic but she'd never know what was truth, what was a plain lie, and what was just a little bit exaggerated. She wanted to know what was what, and that book had the answers. She felt another kiss on the back of her neck as he relaxed again, and as she sighed somewhat contentedly, she turned the page and delved into the chapter again.

Bickslow was half asleep, resting his face in the crook of her neck as she read. He wanted to sleep, knowing that it was somewhere around two o'clock in the morning, but he couldn't. He was too anxious. He knew what chapter Lucy was reading – what she was learning about, and he knew that she'd eventually ask him about it. Bickslow knew for a fact that that particular chapter of the book was badly written – he'd read it countless times himself. It was _his_ magic. He knew almost everything there was to know about it, but _that_ chapter, it had confused the living hell out of him and that was saying something.

He just had to wait for Lucy. Once she'd asked whatever it was she wanted to ask, he could sleep and let her continue reading or whatever it was she decided to do after.

And then after a little while, with her brow furrowed in confusion at what she'd just read, she closed the book and placed it on the nightstand before reaching up to switch off the lamp. "Bickslow?" Lucy whispered as she roller to her other side, Bickslow lifting his arm up to let her move.

"Yeah?" He said quietly, rolling over to the switch off the lamp behind him.

"I don't… I don't quite get it. I mean, it's almost as if that chapter is contradicting everything it mentions." She sighed as she pressed the side of her head into the pillow, pulling the blanket up to her shoulders.

Bickslow made himself comfortable again, the room just light enough for him to make out her features. "I know," He mumbled. "What do you want to know?" Because really, it wasn't up to him to deny her information she obviously wanted to know. He couldn't do that to her.

"Control." She mumbled as she furrowed her brow once again, thinking back to the words the author had used that had made her so confused. "I mean like… ugh, this is hard." And it was, because she didn't want to use the wrong word or say something the wrong way. Based on what she'd read of the book, Lucy knew that that aspect of Seith magic was a touchy subject for those who used the Human Possession variant of it, and she didn't want to hurt or offend Bickslow from asking something the wrong way. It was supposed to get her closer to him, not the other way around.

And Bickslow knew she was having trouble finding the right words. "Just say it." He said, a little harsher than he'd planned.

A sigh escaped her lips as she closed her eyes for a few seconds. "Control is learned, right?"

"Yes." He replied simply.

"But… someone could still lose that control, despite having learned how to control the… activation?" She opened one eye, trying to see Bickslow's reaction in the dark. That was the part where it got hard and she got confused, and that was the part where she needed an actual Seith mage to explain it. It just sucked that the only Human Possession Seith mage she knew happened to be Bickslow and she really didn't want to say something stupid.

"Yes."

"So… isn't that more or less saying the user hasn't really learned how to control it?"

"Sort of."

A long moment passed as Lucy put all of the information together in her head, putting all of the pieces that Bickslow had confirmed or explained where they belonged or 'tossing' out the pieces that her mind had put question marks on. Bickslow hadn't said much, only saying the bare minimum to answer her questions, but Lucy felt like she'd understood something else from it. Something he didn't want her to know, perhaps?

But she wanted to know.

"Bicks?" She finally said in a quiet whisper having formed her next questions in her mind.

"Mmhmm." He hummed into the pillow.

"…Do you have control?" She said as softly as possible, not realising she was fisting the pillow cover in her hand.

And not a single part of Bickslow had expected her to ask that question. He'd thought she was done, but he realised he should have known better. Of course she was going to ask that; Hell, he had basically already answered that question, unintentionally of course as he thought about his previous answers.

"Yes." He said after a short pause.

Lucy pulled her bottom lip into her mouth as she found herself in a mental argument with herself over whether or not she should ask what she wanted to. She had a feeling it was going to be a question Bickslow wouldn't particularly want to answer, but… if she asked and he didn't answer, would she be okay with that? _Yeah, I would be_ , she told herself. If anything, it would show the line that wasn't ready to be crossed, and she would be okay with just sitting on it for a while.

"But you can lose that control, can't you?" Lucy said, barely a whisper.

 _Fuck, fuck, fuck._ Every muscle had tensed up and for the first time, he was glad he wasn't touching her – even just his arm resting over her and she'd know just how much that question had effected him.

And the worst part was, Bickslow realised, was that it was just that - it was a question. But it was a question with an answer that even he didn't like. It was an answer that would most likely make Lucy lose all trust in him and he really didn't want that, not so soon after gaining it. But if she lost trust in him, would that mean he'd lose her? Hell, he didn't even _have_ her!

He could lie, but then he'd have that hanging over his head and if (or when) he decided to come clean with it, everything would be so much worse. Lying was out, it seemed.

He could just not answer it, but silence often spoke louder than words, so that was out too.

So what was he supposed to do?

Tell her the truth, that was what. The truth that he didn't want to say because he could potentially lose the girl whom he cared about, and he wasn't ready for that. He didn't think he'd ever be ready for that, and that's something that scared him.

But time was up. He had no choice but the answer the question. So finally, he closed his eyes after staring at the dark outline of the blonde lying merely inches from him, he answered the question.

"Yes."

And when Bickslow rolled onto his stomach and facing away from her, Lucy took it as a sign he didn't want to talk about it anymore, and that was something she was fine with. He'd answered her questions and that was what she wanted. She didn't care about the answers, not really, anyway. She didn't care that there was a possibility Bickslow could lose control – briefly, as the book had actually stated – because she trusted him.

But she didn't want to say any more, not when she knew she'd already said too much that night. Instead, she'd leave it, partly because her tiredness had hit her like a freight train as soon as she'd closed the book.

So with a silent goodnight to the Seith mage beside her, she closed her eyes and embraced the feeling of falling asleep next to Bickslow intentionally.

* * *

 **Again, I know there's going to be a few (a lot) of errors in this. I'll have them all fixed in the morning, but like I said, I just really wanted to get this chapter out because honestly, it made me a little excited.**

 _ **UPDATE: YAY FOR FIXED MISTAKES! I hope I got them all. I was reading this on my phone last night and I was shaking my head at how many things I missed. Oops. ;)**_

 **Just another reminder that due to study commitments, this will NOT be updated on a regular, weekly basis. I'm hoping for every two-three weeks, but we'll see as the semester progresses. So please don't hate me if I disappear for a few weeks!**

 **Anyway, time for me to go to bed! Please remember to review (if you can, I'd honestly love you forever).**

 **\- April**


	18. Chapter 18

Lucy rubbed at her eyes with one hand as she awoke the next morning before tucking the hair that had fallen across her face behind her ear. A stretch behind her to paw at her keys on the nightstand allowed her to brush over Horologium's key and a lazy smile crossed her face to know it was only a little past 9:00AM. She was usually in the guild by that time, but she didn't care she'd slept 'late' that morning. After all, she'd read for most of the night.

She shifted in the bed slightly, only to have Bickslow subconsciously pull her closer to his side. It was then that Lucy realised the shirt (that was really more like a dress) had ridden up in her sleep, leaving Bickslow's arm draped across the small of her back lazily. But she didn't mind. As long as his hand didn't roam any higher or lower ( _definitely_ not lower), she was fine with it.

But Bickslow was still asleep anyway, still unaware that he'd moved in his sleep just to be closer to her.

Lucy looked at the peaceful form beside her. There was something about seeing people asleep that warmed her heart. When people were asleep, they were exposed, and even the strongest of her friends all looked peaceful when they were completely asleep. Lucy had always thought that even if you'd had the worst of the days, there was always something to look forward to. That was sleep. It was the one time she could just forget about everything that had happened, and be truly at peace, even without realising it. And Bickslow really did look like he was peace.

A small smile crept across her face as her eyes roamed up to his hair – strands of blue at all odd angles, some even covering a part of his forehead. And then she focused on the mark that covered a fair share of his upper face. Curiosity got the better of her as she slowly raised a hand from where it had been resting on her pillow and she ran a finger lightly down the mark, from where it began at the top of his forehead and down to where it ran onto his nose. She didn't know what to expect, texture wise, anyway. It wasn't rough, nor did it feel any different to that that was unmarked and she was pleasantly surprised.

Bickslow shifted slightly at the strange tickling sensation running down the bridge of his nose. His nose crinkled up at it, only to be followed by a giggle from a blonde that was apparently still next to him. He opened one eye slowly and it was at that moment, he knew the days that he could wake up next to Lucy were going to be good days; the days where the first thing he would see in the morning would be her smile.

"What are you doing?" He asked quietly, still laden with sleep.

"Nothing," She replied, her smile faltering as she remembered the previous night's awkwardness. She'd decided she'd leave it then, but that was only because she was tired. Now, she wasn't, and since she'd remembered it, Lucy knew she'd have no way of getting it out of her head until she talked about it. She just didn't know how painful that conversation was going to be. "Look, um… about last night…" She mumbled.

 _Fuck. I was hoping she'd leave that,_ Bickslow thought as he finally realised where his arm was. He'd wanted to leave his arm there, draped over her as he could feel the warmth coming from her skin, but he knew he couldn't. Not when there was the issue of whether or not she still trusted him. He moved his arm to join his other one under his pillow, folding them over each other as he shifted to get comfortable again, waiting for Lucy to finish her sentence.

"I… I'm glad that you answered every single one of my questions, I really am, because I know I asked you some that you didn't really want to answer… but… I just…" She said quietly, trailing off.

 _I just don't think I can trust you? Is that what she's going to say?_

Bickslow moved to the edge of the bed, placing his feet on the black rug below the bed before he stood up to make his way over to the drawers by the end. If Lucy was going to say what he thought she was, then he didn't want to be only a few inches away from her, just because he wouldn't want her to see that it would hurt him. The guy who always laughed everything off, never caring enough to get hurt by anything, would get hurt by her losing trust in him over something he couldn't control. And he laughed, internally, because that was the problem. It would be over control, control that could be lost at any time, should he lose focus or have something thrown at him complete unexpectedly, and he hated that.

He shrugged a shirt over his head as he stood with his back to the bed, still waiting for her to finish as he mentally braced himself for the words he didn't want to hear.

A quiet sigh escaped her lips as Lucy sat up, folding her legs under her as the duvet pooled around her hips. "I just… I feel like you didn't want me to know about your magic too much, not your eyes, anyway."

 _…Huh?_ Bickslow turned his head to see the bed from the corner of his vision. _Where is she going with this?_

Lucy continued quietly, "But… I just want you to know that I don't really care, and if you don't want me to learn more about Seith magic, then I won't."

 _She… doesn't care? What?_

Lucy watched and waited for Bickslow to do anything or make a single sound. She was starting to get worried and she didn't like that. _What if I said the wrong thing? What if I made things worse? Oh God, what have I done?!_

Bickslow stayed motionless for what felt like hours when in reality it was only a few minutes. His head was working overtime with trying to understand what Lucy had said. He was still trying to figure out what it was she didn't care about – was it him, or was it the fact that there was a possibility he could lose control of his magic? Only one of them was good, and he would be lying if he said he wasn't curious as to which it was.

"What…? I don't…" He muttered, still not looking at her.

Lucy sighed quietly. It was hard to talk about something when you were really only going on what you thought someone felt like and thought about something, it really was. The problem was that it wasn't the kind of situation the two could sit down and talk about it openly and Lucy knew that. She knew there was a serious reason as to why Bickslow was acting the way he was and she wanted to help him. She wanted to be able to sit down and talk about it openly, but she didn't know if Bickslow would go for it.

"Bickslow, sit, please." She said quietly, because she wasn't going to try and talk to the guy if his back was facing her. Not a chance. So when he remained standing, still not having moved a muscle, Lucy narrowed her eyes as she pointed to the vacant spot on the bed beside her. " _Sit_." She said firmly.

And boy, did Bickslow sit, although still with his back to her which was something that Lucy still didn't like, so she moved to kneel on the bed, letting the blanket fall down more and expose the tops of her thighs, she placed her hands over Bickslow's shoulders and pulled him down to lay on his back. Bickslow hadn't been expecting her to do that in the slightest, but if he had, he definitely would not be on his back and staring up at Lucy who hovered over him, her hair falling down and into his face. He just… didn't know what to do, or say. He had nothing at that moment, and that was rare. His mind was just blank.

"Now, Bicks," She said as she tucked her hair behind her ears as she leant back slightly, leaving her hands by his head. "We're going to talk about this, and by that I mean _you're_ going to talk, because I was trying my best last night to avoid offending you in any way, but that seemed to have failed. I tried to explain that I don't care, but do you know how hard it is to try and understand something when someone won't talk about it? It's really fucking hard, okay." She took a deep breath to calm herself down, and then, "I just want you to talk about whatever it is that's worrying you, but… if you really can't, then tell me so I can leave."

"So much for wanting _me_ to talk…" He mumbled, only warranting a small smile from the blonde above him. He took a few moments to think about it, even though he already knew he'd have no choice but to talk about it. Bickslow didn't want her to leave – in whatever way she meant by that. That was one of the last things he wanted. So that left him with talking.

There was really only one thing that was bothering him, and that was whether or not she still trusted him – enough to be around him, anyway. There was a very big part of him that still didn't want to know the answer, but again, he needed to know.

So when he was certain Lucy was going to get fed up of the silence and walk out anyway, he finally tilted his head back into the mattress just enough to look her directly in the eyes, only to be surprised when she didn't look away.

"Do you trust me?" He asked quietly.

"Yes." Lucy replied without a flicker of doubt.

"Why?"

"Because I have no reason _not_ to trust y-"

"Yes you do." Bickslow interrupted.

"No, I don't. You're still missing the point, Bickslow." She said flatly as she folded her arms across her chest.

But Bickslow, in the somewhat stressed state he was in, had completely forgotten about the point. He didn't know what the point was, not even a tiny idea of what it was. "You shouldn't trust me. Seith magic is unsta-"

"Bickslow," She cut him off, "I don't care. _That's the point_." And Lucy really didn't think she'd have to basically lay it all out for him. She knew he was smart – smarter than he let on because there was no way in hell that Laxus would 'socialise' (or whatever it was that Laxus did, aside from electrocuting his team when they pissed him off) with imbeciles or idiots. It was probably why he hated Natsu so much.

And Bickslow was slowly beginning to understand what she'd meant. Sure, still didn't get it completely, but he was getting there and he wasn't as worried about the possibility of Lucy deciding that they should stop doing whatever it was they were doing (something that would probably always remain a mystery to the pair).

After a moment's pause, Lucy continued, "I don't know everything about your magic yet, but I want to. That includes your Figure Eyes. And do you want to know why?"

"Not really…" He mumbled, a little afraid of what the reason was.

"Because it's a part of you." Her hands came to rest on the mattress on either side of his head again as her hair came loose from where it was tucked behind her ears. "I don't care that there's a _chance_ you can lose that control you have over it. I don't care what the likelihood of that happening is, and I don't care that you think I shouldn't trust you, because I do.

"I trust you because you know more about it. It's your magic and you know exactly what your limits are when it comes to it." Lucy tucked her hair behind her ears once again with a quiet sigh. The plan was to make Bickslow talk, but there she was, rambling on about it and barely letting the man get a word in (not that he really had anything to say and Lucy knew that deep down). But regardless, she felt like she was getting somewhere, finally. It hadn't even been a month and they'd already crossed over to the 'we're gonna sit down and have a mature conversation about this when it's really just you (Bickslow) being a complete idiot' part. It wasn't necessarily bad; it was just… new. New could be good.

"The point I tried to make is that whether or not you want my trust, you have it, and I know I've said it about a million times already, but I really don't care, and I really hope you understand that now." Lucy said quietly.

Bickslow honestly felt like a complete idiot. Lucy had been right – he did know what his limits were, and that included knowing exactly what it would take for him to ever lose control over that aspect of his magic. Bickslow realised he'd made it seem like the chance of ever losing that control was something that was incredibly likely, when in reality, it was rare. That was the problem with that chapter in the book – it failed to list the common reasons for Seith mages to ever lose control, along with forgetting to mention that it was a brief occurrence. Not only that, but never once had that book said anything about Seith mages who _had_ established control (which if you thought about it was probably never a good word to use) and ever losing that said ability to control their Figure Eyes. Bickslow was one of those who'd learned how to control it, and that meant the chances of him ever losing that control were incredibly slim.

More than anything, he hated himself in that moment. But self-hatred aside, he was happy. He was happy because Lucy had taken one of the many cons of his magic in stride and she just didn't care. She trusted him, and that was what he'd wanted.

He ran his hands down his face as he groaned into them, before he spread his fingers over his eyes and looked up at the blonde who was still hovering above him. "I feel like an even bigger idiot than I usually am right now." He mumbled when he dropped his hands from his face.

"That's because you are." Lucy said with a quiet giggle before she lowered her head as her hands went to either side of his face and with her blonde hair cascading around his head, she kissed him softly. "Do you get it now?" She whispered as she lifted her head again.

"Yeah," Bickslow said quietly as he tilted his head back more, "But you know what the worst part is?"

"What?"

"The likelihood of me not being able to control it is incredibly low, so I was really just worried over nothing and making a big deal for no reason." And it was the first time Bickslow had ever said it out loud, and that was because _he_ trusted Lucy. He was comfortable enough now to be able to talk about it.

Lucy smiled as she pushed herself up from her knees to move to the edge of the bed. "I figured, otherwise you'd constantly be wearing your visor." Bickslow was a little shocked, and there were two reasons for that. The first reason was that he'd sat up to rest on his elbows as she got off the bed and he'd done so in time to see the shirt that had apparently ridden up fall down to cover the dark purple lace panties she'd been wearing. What could he say? He liked lace.

Secondly, once again, Lucy had somehow known more than she'd let on and purposely waited until the perfect time to let whatever it was she had been holding on to be known. Bickslow realised that she'd just been waiting for him to say it himself, and in a way, he was a little grateful.

"Also, I'm using your shower."

* * *

Lucy sank down into the warm water of the female bath at the guild. Levy and Gajeel had decided to return to the guild after almost a week, and before the poor girl could even take a seat at a table, Mira and Cana had decided to drag her to the baths. It didn't take very long for everyone else to get the message and soon they all ran off to join Levy, Mira, and Cana in the baths. What could Lucy say? She just really wanted to hear about Levy's week with Gajeel, much like everyone else.

Unfortunately, they had still yet to realise that anyone who was using the male bath on the floor below could hear anything that was going on.

"So, now that our little Levy has stepped up her game and got a man, what about our other favourite virgin?" Cana said mischievously as she turned to the blonde beside her.

Lucy blushed furiously as she tried to form her words, only to fail dismally. "I… I…" She managed to squeak out before sliding down to dip her head below the water, just wanting to hide for a few seconds. She could hear the giggles from the women around her in the bath from below the water. As she broke the surface of the water and made herself comfortable again, bringing her knees up, she pushed her hair back and out of her face, ready to deny any questions about whether or not she was seeing anyone.

"Holy shit, is that a hickey?!" Came from Cana as she sidled up to the blonde, grabbing her hair and pushing it back out of the way to examine the mark on the blonde's neck.

Lucy squealed as she tried her best to tilt her head to be able to see whatever it was that was on her neck, only to realise she wouldn't be seeing it unless she had a mirror. _A hickey?!_ _When the hell did he do that?!_ "What?! No!" She shrieked as she swatted Cana's hands away, covering the side of her neck with a hand. _Damn it, no wonder he said to wear my hair down!_

"I bet it's from Natsu." Mira giggled as she stepped down into the bath.

Lisanna turned to her sister with an equally as mischievous smirk, "Or Gray."

"Love Rival?!" Juvia said almost mournfully just from the thought of her beloved touching another woman.

Lucy was slowly sinking down into the water the longer it went on. She couldn't tell if her face was so hot because of the steam from the water or the fact that she was most likely blushing profusely. There was no way she'd be able to deny the fact she was seeing someone, and there was no way she'd tell any of them who it was actually from. Not any time soon, anyway.

"So? Who did it?" Cana asked as she took a drink from the tankard that was sitting just to the edge of the bath.

Lucy only shook her head as she stood up and stepped out of the bath, picking up her towel as she wrapped it around herself and made her way over the changing rooms. She could hear the sounds of everyone else getting out of the bath to follow her, having decided that they really wanted to know about the blonde's love life.

"Are they in the guild?" Erza asked, though everyone knew it wasn't just because she was curious. It was because the scarlet-haired mage was most likely going to run a through sword through them.

But Lucy was just going to remain silent. She wasn't going to flat out say no to anything, nor was she going to confirm anything. She would say nothing, because she knew that if she did say something, there was the chance she'd let something slip and that was what the group was hoping for.

* * *

Bickslow was leaning against the bar with Laxus by the time they all came downstairs, Lucy being surrounded by the group of women who were giggling and whispering to each other. Laxus turned his head to glare at the group as they came closer to the bar, listening intently to the questions coming from all of them. "This will be interesting…" He muttered before taking a drink.

Bickslow could only raise an eyebrow, wondering what his friend could possibly mean, but he watched as they all took a seat at the bar or stood around it, Cana taking the seat next to him with the blonde next to her. It was then that he finally understood why Laxus had said it would be interesting.

"Come on, just tell us already!" Cana whined as she rested her head in her palm.

"We all know it's Natsu, there's no point of hiding it." Mira said as she moved to stand behind the bar, lining up the dirty glasses and picking up a rag from behind her.

"I still think it could be Gra-"

"No!" Juvia interrupted the youngest Strauss, still not entirely willing to think about that possibility.

And Lucy could only sigh as she rest her head in her hands. "I never said they were in the guild." She finally said quietly, breaking her oath of silence. There was no way she was going to let two of her best friends get brought into the mess she had unintentionally created (well, it was really Bickslow's fault, she decided).

"But you never denied it." Levy said.

Bickslow sat there amused the entire time. It was only when they had started listing off the names of all of the guys in the guild that could be potential 'secret boyfriends' did he lose his smirk. But then he remembered he'd never be on that list anyway, so he could go back to listening to Lucy get hounded with questions.

"Seriously, it has to be Natsu." Mira stated again.

Lucy shook her head. "No." She wasn't going to remain silent, and she wasn't going to give anything away. No, she'd go along with the little game they had decided to make out of it. "And it's not Gray, either." She said as she looked towards Juvia and then Lisanna, one of them smiling while the other had a face masked with confusion.

"What about… Laxus?" Cana said with a devilish smirk as she turned in her chair in time to see Laxus choke as he took a sip.

The Dragon Slayer glared at the brunette, "Fuck off." He muttered.

"Oh! Maybe Freed?" Levy mused as everyone at the bar turned to the small bluenette. There was a moment of silence before they all burst out into laughter, Laxus included. "Yeah, maybe you're right…" She finished with her own giggle.

And it went on for a while. Lucy was running out of ways to say 'no' and she was getting a little irritated by how persistent they were. As the list went on, Bickslow found himself tuning out as he wondered just why he wasn't even considered. He knew he wasn't going to be, but he kind of wanted to know _why_. What was it about him that made it so?

"Aren't you forgetting someone?" Evergreen muttered from where she stood next to Lisanna and Elfman (who at some point had decided to join in on the conversation, though he wasn't too happy about being put on 'Lucy's list'). They all turned to the only female of the Raijinshuu. Lucy wondered just what she was doing, and so did Laxus. Bickslow, on the other hand, had stopped paying attention completely and had no idea what was going on. "Maybe it's Bickslow?" She finished with with her wicked smile.

Suddenly, Erza's favourite short-sword had appeared in her hand and Laxus had to elbow the Seith mage in the side to get his attention.

"Hey! What was that for!" He hissed at the blonde who tipped his head towards the group of women who were eyeing him curiously (though Evergreen was smirking so he instantly knew that whatever was going on, the self-proclaimed Fairy Queen had something to do with it). "What?"

And then they all looked between themselves as they leant in over the bar, "I mean, he did kiss her the other week…" Mira said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, but it was a dare or something." Lisanna chimed in.

"You're forgetting something important here." Cana said as she shifted in her seat as they all turned to look at her, Lucy included. "There is no way that Lucy would ever date Bickslow, and let's not forget that Bickslow doesn't date."

Bickslow shrugged, "She has a point."

"See?" Cana gestured to the grinning Bickslow beside her, "It's not him."

"He only said you had a point, not that you were right." Evergreen said from the other end of the bar, warranting a glare from the Seith mage and she knew it.

"It's the same thing." Bickslow said, "Trust me, if I ever started dating someone, you'd know about it."

And when they were all certain that Lucy's 'secret boyfriend' wasn't the Seith mage, they all frowned slightly. Between them, they'd gone through almost every male in the guild (including some of the ones that weren't even available) and they'd still come up with nothing. Lucy hadn't had a chance to get a word in once Evergreen had involved Bickslow, but she hadn't had to. They'd shut it down themselves.

So with a small smile she shrugged and rested her head in her palm. "I never said he was in the guild."

* * *

 **First week of uni was slow and I managed to get all of my classes over the first three days of the week so I was able to get this up early. It didn't turn out how I'd originally planned, but... eh. As usual, hope it's okay. Not good with the whole 'talking about feelings' things.**

 **Also! Thank you so much for 100 favourites!**

 **Now to go have some fun with _A Peculiar Situation_! :D**

 **\- April**


	19. Chapter 19

Whenever Bickslow walked into the guild over the next few days, he was greeted by the most creative of rumours regarding the news of Lucy seeing someone. He had no idea how any of them had been started but he'd had a feeling a few of the guys had played a part. After all, he knew just how much could be heard from the male bath and he also knew that the entire thing had started in the bath. Yes, he'd learned that after Lucy had told him off for giving her a hickey – although, in his defence, he had been half asleep at the time and hadn't realised he'd done it until the morning which was why he'd told her to wear her hair down. He'd never expected anyone to see it.

But on this day, the rumours seemed to have spiralled out of control even more and some of them actually made him laugh. His new favourite was that Lucy was simultaneously dating Gray and Gajeel, and let's not to forget the one where she was sleeping with Gildarts.

He couldn't help but feel a little sorry for her since after all, it was ultimately his fault the rumours had started. Not that he was ever going to be sorry for leaving that kind of mark on her; he'd just have to find more creative places.

But that aside, he had another problem. The few times they'd talked since then, every conversation had ended with her saying she'd 'see when she was free' for dinner and that left Bickslow wondering just what the hell was going on. With every other date there hadn't been an issue with someone being busy, and half of them had just been a 'go with the flow' kind of thing.

If not being able to touch her was frustrating (seriously, he didn't even understand what was going on there), then it was the fact that Mira had convinced her to go out with herself, Lisanna, Levy, and Cana. The only reason he'd known about that was because Laxus had overheard it (whether he'd done so on purpose was a mystery).

And so as Gajeel sat down next to the Seith mage like he'd been doing a lot during the week (it was somewhat fitting the Dragon Slayer's girlfriend was best friends with the girl his own best friend was dating), he decided he was fed up with the grumpier than usual man. It hadn't been part of his plan to share that he knew exactly what the blonde was doing, but he liked meddling.

"She's playin' Hard to Get." Gajeel said with his usual smirk.

"Eh?"

"The Demon and Shrimp talked her into it after you decided to give her a hickey."

"It was unintentional." Bickslow muttered. _But Hard to Get? What the fuck?_ It wasn't that he didn't understand what she was doing, because he did. He knew exactly what it meant, but he didn't understand why.

Gajeel shrugged and put an arm over the back of the bench, absentmindedly unscrewing one of the bolts from the back of it. "You do know they're goin' to a bar in Hargeon later, right?"

"I heard."

Laxus sighed as he pulled the Sound-Pod from his ears, dropping it on the table as he lowered his chin to his palm. It was almost as if since he'd starting dating (or whatever the fuck it was that they two were doing – Bickslow couldn't give Laxus the answer to that question), he'd reached a new level of stupid. If anything, he'd thought the blonde would make him less stupid. But he was seriously missing the point of what Lucy was doing and he was frustrated at how much he had taken an interest in it.

"She's only doing it to see how interested you actually are."

But Bickslow was certain Lucy knew just how interested he was in her. Maybe he'd been wrong? _In that case_ , _two can play at that game then_ , Bickslow thought. If Lucy was trying to see where they stood, then he'd go along with it. After all, it was a game and Bickslow liked games.

* * *

Lucy was not looking forward to her night, not one little bit. She sat in the train compartment with her friends as they headed towards Hargeon. Mira was giggling over finally getting a girl's night out after such a long time and Cana was just happy to have some more drinking buddies.

But Lucy wasn't really interested in any of it. She was still wondering why she'd let Mira and Levy convince her to play 'hard to get', whatever that meant. It wasn't like she needed to make sure she had Bickslow's attention because to her, it was pretty evident she did. But on the other side, it wasn't like they'd had exclusively stated that they weren't going to see or date anyone else, and that was the main reason for her being dragged along to Hargeon. Somehow, she'd let her friends believe that she wasn't the least bit serious about her 'relationship' with the man and that it was still in that 'testing the waters' stage, and she really didn't think it was.

The problem was that Lucy didn't really want to have that awkward 'what are we?' conversation with Bickslow, just because for the time being, she was fine with whatever they were doing. She was inclined to just admit to herself that what they were doing was 'dating', rather than 'sort of, kind of dating', but she'd need to finish up with the 'playing hard to get' game that her friends had insisted she try.

And you'd think that a night of dancing and drinking would make her happy, but it wasn't. So far she had spent the vast majority of her night sitting at their booth, sipping away on the drinks that never seemed to stop coming. She knew that she was supposed to be getting drunk enough to at least act like she was single, not to mention that if she did get drunk, there was a high possibility of her blurting out who it was she was actually dating.

But the blonde knew she was ruining everyone else's night, so as she downed the rest of her drink, she slid out of the booth as she took Levy's hand and dragged her over to the crowded dance floor, the two Strauss' and the adopted Strauss soon following after the pair. She was going to enjoy the rest of her night, even if it meant waking up with a killer headache.

* * *

When Bickslow pushed the door to his apartment open later that night, he'd intended to just have a shower and go to bed – his usual routine, but as he was closing the door behind him, he looked over to the bookshelf; the same bookshelf that rarely got touched and he never thought about. He slowly made his way over to it, still not sure what he was doing, but there on the shelf, exactly where she had left it, was one of the books Lucy had pulled out when she had been there a few days earlier.

Bickslow picked up the book, flipping it around in his hands to read the front of it and then the back of it, instantly remembering why he even had that book in his possession. It wasn't one of the many books that Freed had given him and it wasn't one of the books on Seith magic or Rune magic that he also owned. No, it was something he'd forgotten he even had and he could feel his heart start beating just a tiny bit faster when he remembered what it was.

It was his mother's favourite book.

The very same book that he'd grown up seeing her read almost religiously and it was one of the few things he'd taken with him when he'd left after their death. His hand wiped the dust from the cover before his fingers light traced over the slightly worn cover.

He was suddenly finding it difficult to breathe and he could only slam the book back down on one of the shelves as his hands reached out to steady himself. His chest hurt and he could hear his heart beating in his ears. He kept his eyes shut as he dropped his head, trying to steady his breathing. Even though there was no one around, he still hated what he knew was happening.

He hated lots of things, really. He hated the way he was feeling and he hated the way that he was losing control. That was the thing with his control – it was incredibly unlikely because Bickslow rarely felt like that and so far, that was the only thing that seemed to push him over that edge. As he felt his eyes starting to burn the insides of his eyelids, he shut them even tighter, pressing his forearm against his eyes as he leant on the bookshelf.

And after a while of him trying to calm himself down, even though the pain in his chest was refusing to leave, he could finally drop his head again, and as he did so, he felt but a single tear slide down and he knew exactly what it was.

For the first time in what was really only five years to Bickslow, he genuinely missed his parents.

There was a reason Bickslow was the way he was – laughing everything off and not caring about things, and that was because if he ever let himself feel like the way he was feeling in that moment, he would lose the control he had over his eyes. And it's not like it was all bad, because he'd generally always been the kind of person to have fun with everything and anything, it was just that after his parents' deaths, he had to take that to a new level.

In the year following their death, he was constantly having to remind himself that he couldn't let anything get to him. If something were to hit him unexpectedly and he let his emotions take hold of him then the control that he'd worked so hard to get would be gone. Bickslow had always hated how that felt and he still did. He couldn't put into words how it felt to lose something that was yours, for however briefly it may be.

He just couldn't get overwhelmed.

But it wasn't just the first time in five years Bickslow had missed his parents; it was the first time he _ever_ had.

After their death, he'd closed himself off, and that was for the safety of others and himself. And in his own weird way, Bickslow could only be a little glad that it was hitting him then and not when he was still a teenager. He'd had time to accept it and he had a home and he was happy with everything that he had going for him. He'd have been a lot worse if he didn't have any of that.

Bickslow slid down the floor, not having the energy to stand anymore, and he stayed there for a long time. For the first time, he felt like something was missing from his life, and he knew that was his parents; his actual family. But he also knew that it was just his emotions getting the better of him, being too overwhelmed and making himself believe it was worse than it really was.

Then, when he'd finally calmed himself down enough so that he could actually breathe and he'd stopped shedding tears (something he would refuse to admit ever happened if anyone ever asked him), his thoughts returned to the book – the book that had started it all.

It wasn't just his mother's favourite book; it was one of Lucy's too. And he didn't know what it was, but somehow, just thinking about that made the ache in his chest fade just a tiny bit. It was then that Bickslow decided that he wasn't going to be playing any games when it came to her – not a single one. Sure, he would still have his fun because that's just who he was, but it wasn't going to be a game.

Slowly, Bickslow pushed himself up from the floor and made his way down to his bathroom, throwing his cloak on the bed and pulling his shirt off over his head as he walked. He just wanted to move on from the night's events and go to bed.

Although he didn't realise it at the time, there would be something that drew his attention and would stop him from sleeping as much as he'd planned that night.

* * *

Lucy awoke the next morning with a pounding headache just like she'd expected and she really just wanted to spend the day in bed, or on her bathroom floor; either would be fine with the blonde. She'd ended up drinking the most out of her friends and she didn't really know how that had happened. The last thing she could remember was kicking some guy who got a little too close to her, getting herself and her friends kicked out of the bar in the process. The rest was in bits and pieces but the more she thought about her night, the more her head hurt and the more she wanted to throw up.

But no, she couldn't spend all day in her apartment, preferably next to her toilet. At some point she could remember promising Levy she'd be in the guild the next day – before noon, as explicitly stated, she could remember that part – and Lucy wasn't one to go back on promises.

So the blonde heaved herself up from where she was laying on her bed, still in her clothes from the night before, and made her way slowly to her bathroom. Usually, she'd just take a bath, but she absolutely hated baths when she was hungover. Showers were always the way to go and it was one of the rare times her shower ever got any action.

A quick glance towards her clock once she'd gone about her usual morning routine (though a lot slower than usual) and she was confident she'd arrive at the guild before noon, which was all that mattered at that point, really.

And then, as she pulled her door closed behind her and locked up her apartment, she turned and made her way towards the beginning of the stairs, only to stop when she saw a book balanced on the railing separating the stairwell and the floor she was standing on.

Lucy stared down at the large book with the deep red cover adorned with black accents on the spine of the book and on the corners. She picked up the book, almost dropping it when she realised just how heavy it was, and she pulled the folded up piece of paper that was sitting on the cover.

She looked down at the book in her hands as she tucked the paper behind it, deciding to come back to that in a second. She smiled when she saw the title: _The Complete History and Workings of Seith Magic: Human Possession, Volume 1_. Her fingers traced over the slightly worn cover, faded with age and slightly torn in the corners, but Lucy didn't care. She'd always thought that the more used a book was, the better it was. She flipped the book open, flicking through the pages until she reached the information she'd wanted. _'First published: X702.'_

Her mouth opened in shock slightly, trying to figure out how Bickslow had managed to get his hands on a ninety-year-old book. But she could always ask that later, so as she placed the book back down on the railing gently, she pulled the note out again and unfolded it, reading the words written in the messy scrawl.

 _ **I realised I don't mind if you want to learn more about it, but I also don't think I'd be able to stop you from finding out more even if I tried.**_

 _ **So if you really want to know everything there is to know about it, then this will help.**_

It wasn't signed as being from Bickslow but she knew it was from him. Who else would give her a massive book on Seith magic?

Lucy was extraordinarily glad Bickslow was fine with her learning more about Seith magic. She had been prepared to sneak off to the library in the guild at night to read what few books they had with information pertaining to Seith magic (even Bickslow had more books on it than the guild did), but she didn't have to do that.

But then she remembered what day it was. As of that day, it had been a month since their first date. She knew it wasn't something to be celebrated (although she was in her head because she never in her wildest dreams expected to be dating Bickslow - still) but she could still be happy about it.

Now, whether or not Bickslow knew that little detail was something else. Lucy didn't think he did and he didn't expect him to either so she didn't think of the book as being anything other than an extremely thoughtful gift that said he trusted her, which was something they hadn't discussed, not that she wanted to ask either.

Little did she know that Bickslow knew exactly what the date was and it was part of the reason he'd gotten up earlier than usual just to go and find a book on Seith magic for her, because he knew she wanted to know more about it. But Bickslow too knew that it wasn't something to be celebrated, but much like Lucy, he could still be happy about it and celebrate it in his head.

* * *

Laxus, Evergreen, and Freed all turned to stare at the the guild's resident Seith mage who had just walked through the doors and into a table. Now, that was something that none of them had see because the guy was almost the complete opposite of clumsy – he was an acrobat, he didn't walk into a tables.

Not unless he was too busy reading a book and not watching where he was walking.

So the three watched in complete shock as he came to sit at their table, turning a page as he continued reading, not even muttering a greeting or grinning. Nothing.

Now, Bickslow didn't read, but after staring at the ceiling in his bedroom for God knows how long the night before, he'd pushed the sheets back to climb out of his bed and go back out to his living room to collect the book that had had more of an effect on him that he thought a book ever would or could.

He didn't even know how long he'd read for because from the moment he read the first word of the first chapter, he had been completely sucked in. Next thing he knew he was a quarter of the way through the book and the beginnings of the sunrise was peeking through his curtains.

So he'd begrudgingly put the book down because he knew if he didn't get any sleep then he was just going to be even more miserable than he already was.

But he didn't get much sleep, only a few hours at most and he had things to do; books to buy.

And he really hoped that Lucy liked the book. It didn't matter to Bickslow that it was expensive - money was never an issue to the Seith mage, because it was a genuinely well-written book. Even Bickslow had read it, and sure, it had been when he was a teenager, but it was probably one of the only books on Seith magic that flat out stated that there was a lot of cons and misunderstandings associated with that magic, so if Lucy said she really wanted to know everything there was to it, then she needed to know that about it.

So as he sat in the guild, staring down at the book on the table and vaguely aware that his friends were giving him some weird – yet deserved – looks. After all, he was reading a book.

"Bi-?" Evergreen had started, only to be shushed as Bickslow's hand went up, motioning for her to wait. She didn't like that very much at all, but she was honestly still too shocked to comment on it.

Slowly, a cocky grin spread across Freed's face. After all those years, maybe, just maybe, Bickslow was finally taking the Rune mage's advice. And it wasn't just that he was reading a book – willingly, at that, but he actually seemed to be enjoying it thoroughly. So as he folded his arms across his chest and looked towards his teammates, he said with a shrug, "Looks like I-"

"Shh!" Came from Bickslow as he turned his head to glare at the green-haired man. The one time his teammates and friends decided to not to be quiet was the one time he really wanted them to be. He was on the verge of just giving up and going to the library in the basement – at least he'd be able to read in peace there.

* * *

Lucy strolled in right at 11:58AM; something she was quite proud of. She was still feeling too nauseous to stop by the bar to get something from Mira (that and she didn't really want to be reminded too much of what she'd done the night before) so instead she made a beeline to where Levy was sitting, huddled over a stack of papers with her pen in hand. Out of everyone, the small women had had the least to drink so she was able to go about her day with just a small headache.

So as she plopped herself down on the bench opposite her friend, her head instantly hit the table as she folded her arms around it. It was too loud and too bright in there.

"Morning, Lu." Levy said ever-so cheerfully as she glanced up from the pages she was going over. Lucy could only groan into the table in response before picking her head up to rest in her hand.

"Gi-hi, Bunny-girl had a bit too much to drink last night, I see." Gajeel said with his usual grin as he turned to lean over the back of the bench he sat on (which just so happened to be next to Laxus, not that Lucy had realised that).

And before Lucy could even tell the Iron Dragon Slayer to shut up, the sound of a book being slammed shut stopped her. "Alright, that's it," Bickslow declared as he stood up and glared at those around the table, "You fuckers are too noisy."

Gajeel and Evergreen sniggered as the Seith mage made his way to the stairs leading to the basement. It was a rare sight to see the man act like that so they always relished when it did happen.

It didn't take very long for it to go back to normal – Gajeel had switched tables to sit next to the Levy and Evergreen had gone to the bar, presumably to yell at Elfman some more. Lucy still didn't really understand what had happened and why Bickslow had randomly decided to go downstairs, but her head hurt too much to think about it.

She sipped at the water that Mira had brought over before she returned to the bar with a giggle at Lucy's expense and she looked up only to find Levy staring at her intently. Gajeel could only wonder just what the bluenette was planning, because he knew she was planning _something_.

"We should go on a double date!" Levy said enthusiastically.

"Eh?" Gajeel and Lucy said in unison.

"What?" She asked as she looked to both of them with a shrug, "It would be fun! I'd get to go on an actual _nice_ date with Gajeel," She glared at the man who was slowly inching away from her on the bench, "and I'd get to find out who this mystery man is. It's a win-win."

"…For you, maybe." Lucy muttered as her finger ran around the rim of the glass. _A double date? There's no way Bickslow would go for that kind of thing._

"Oh, come on! I'm your best friend, I should know these things!"

"I don't know…" It wasn't like Levy wasn't her best friend, because she was. Her best _girl_ friend anyway, but she wasn't entirely sure she was ready to let anyone else know about her relationship with Bickslow. It wasn't an issue of trusting Levy to keep it a secret because she knew she would. Lucy didn't even have to worry about Gajeel telling anyone because he already knew, and she had to admit she was a little surprised that he hadn't even told Levy.

As she thought about it, she realised it would just be a matter of getting Bickslow to go along with it. She'd never really asked if Bickslow cared that they weren't telling people, but he'd never seemed like it was that big of a deal if they told people or not, too.

But if it was just one more person, then what was the harm?

"Who else are you going to gossip to about your sex life?" Levy whispered as she leaned across the table, winking at the blonde whose cheeks were tinged with pink.

"Shrimp…"

But Levy had a point, Lucy realised. Gossiping over boys was something she would definitely enjoy – not so much the part related to her sex life because it was non-existent, but it would still be fun.

And besides, it had nearly been a week and she was getting frustrated with the game she was playing. She wasn't going to pretend to be busy anymore and fuck it, she was going to kiss him because she was beginning to have withdrawal – something that was probably _not_ good.

"Okay then." Lucy said with a smile as she looked towards the squealing bluenette and the shocked Dragon Slayer before he muttered something under his breath and returned to Laxus' table.

"Really?!" Levy said excitedly as she clasped her hands together. Lucy nodded and the Script mage squealed some more, not even trying to contain her excitement. "This is too good! When should we do it? Oh my gosh, am I going to be the first to know? I'm so excited!"

Lucy giggled at her friend. It was nice to see how excited she was just from being able to see who it was that Lucy was dating. She found herself looking forward to what her friend's reaction would be once she'd found out who it was – that was something that was going to be entertaining considering Levy would be the only one at the table who wouldn't know until that very moment.

She thought for a moment. She didn't really know when Bickslow would be free and she didn't know if his team had any jobs lined up for the end of the week. She still didn't know if Bickslow would like the idea of going on a double date, but hell, she wasn't going to tell him that part. That could be a surprise, she decided.

"What about tomorrow night?" She asked Levy. had

"Yes! Tomorrow is fine!"

"Good," Lucy replied, "I'll let you know the place and time tomorrow morning, but for now, I need to go and get something from the library and then I'm going to go back home." She said as she raised herself from the bench slowly.

"Yes, yes, fine! Go and sleep!" Levy said as she reorganised the papers on the table, trying to find where she'd put the pen. "Ah, this is so exciting!" She said with another squeal as Lucy walked towards the stairs shaking her head.

* * *

Bickslow was sitting on the floor with his back against one of the many shelves in the basement archives. The chairs that room had had always been uncomfortable so on the rare occasion he went down there, he chose the floor over the old chairs. On this particular day he was sitting between the shelves that housed the books no one really read – those were the books on the various types of magic.

In front of him sat the shelves that had once been designated to Celestial Spirit magic and were now empty and covered in dust after Loke had decided to burn them all.

He'd sat there just because it was quiet. He wasn't going to get disturbed because the vast majority of the guild were out on jobs for the day or rest of the week, and to tell the truth, he was still feeling slightly miserable for the previous night's events that had revolved around the book that sat in his hands.

But once again he was mostly lost in the text, nearly half way through it by that point. He could hear someone's footsteps at the end of the isle and coming closer but he didn't bother looking up. Someone would be stupid to comment on the fact he was reading, in a library of all places.

He didn't look up until he felt someone slide down to the floor next to him, that is, and he closed the book after making note of the page he was up to. For her, he'd stop reading, for a while, anyway.

"I thought you didn't read." Lucy mused as she plucked the book from his hands, a smile spreading across her face when she saw what book it was.

"I don't, but this is different." He said quietly before he glanced up at the empty shelves before him. "Did you uh… get the book?"

Lucy's smile grew wider as she dropped the book back in his lap and shifted to rest her head on his shoulder. "I did," She said as she stretched her legs out before her on the floor, crossing her ankles. "And you have no idea how unbelievably happy it made me."

And again, Bickslow could feel the ache in his chest beginning to dissipate and for just a moment, he could forget about just how miserable he was still feeling, because her being happy made him happy. "I'm glad it made you happy." He said quietly with his own small smile, "Anyway, how was your night?" Bickslow asked, desperately trying to think of ways to keep her in the library just so he could spend more time with her. He was over the barely 2-minute conversations they'd had during the week. It was just anything to get her to stay.

Lucy groaned as she lifted her head, wondering just how she'd managed to forget about the pounding headache she'd had since she'd woken up. "I honestly don't even remember much of it. Only bits and pieces."

"Hung-over, I take it?" He chuckled.

Lucy nodded, "Very much so. I drank way too much; I remember that part." She said thoughtfully, replaying the small fragments of her night in her head as she ignored the pounding headache. "I got us all kicked out of the place we went to though."

Bickslow was having a hard time picturing the blonde drunk enough to do something that warranted getting kicked out of a bar. He'd been kicked out of places plenty of times but never had he ever seen Lucy get drunk. He realised it would be an interesting sight. "I'd really love to know how you did that." Bickslow said as he laughed, apologising when the loudness made the blonde lean away slightly.

"Well… I think some guy was getting a bit too… handsy, and close. So there's a possibility I kicked him into a few other people… and a table."

"Wow, remind me not to get too close when you're drunk…" He mumbled.

"I think I'd spare you, but that's one of the only things I remember. I feel like Loke might have tried to be my saviour at one point though…" Small parts of her memories of the night were littered with images of her lion Spirit – one of them with her sitting in his arms and she honestly had no idea how that'd happened. She didn't really want to remember, either.

But Bickslow wasn't exactly too thrilled about that part, especially when he knew that the stupid cat was in love with Lucy. Hell, he'd teased her about it countless times. Even though he knew that Lucy didn't reciprocate those feelings towards her spirit, he still didn't like it. "Maybe you should have left that part out…" Bickslow mumbled as he turned away slightly.

Lucy stared for a few seconds trying to come up with a reason as to why she shouldn't have brought up the part about Loke possibly being her saviour (since she couldn't quite remember what had happened apart from the small bits and pieces that made no sense), but suddenly, a light bulb went off in her head and she finally got it. It was because it was _Loke,_ and maybe, just maybe, it was jealously coming from Bickslow.

"Don't tell me you're jealous." She enquired, moving to lean over him slightly.

Bickslow could see her hovering closer to him from the corner of his vision, including the slight smirk on her lips. "So what if I am?" He mumbled, briefly glancing towards her.

She pressed a kiss to his cheek as she leant in even further and then whispered next to his ear, "I think it's sweet."

A slight shiver coursed throughout him and he didn't know why. He'd had plenty of things whispered in his ear throughout his life, many of which would make anyone other than himself instantly turn a dark red, but never once had it made him do that and never once had Lucy done it and he was honestly a little confused. The blonde was suddenly acting weird (in an incredibly good way, he realised), and he didn't know why. "Are you sure you're not still drunk instead of hung-over?" Because really, that would probably explain the new behaviour.

She shook her head as she grinned, "Nope. Just in a good mood today. Anyway, you heard about my night, so how was yours?"

And Bickslow couldn't answer straight away because he didn't know _how_ to. He didn't think it was fair to tell her about his night – not yet, anyway. He didn't want her to feel sorry for him like he knew she would and he didn't want to burden her, because that's what it was – a burden. His delayed grief was _his_ burden and he didn't want to have anyone else deal with it, least of all Lucy.

But Lucy's smile faded when he didn't answer and remained silent. She looked down to see him fiddling with the corners of the book cover, but that wasn't what worried her. It was when she saw when she looked back up. She saw something she'd never seen on his face, something she didn't understand. The visor he usually wore that could usually mask his emotions was gone, sitting on the floor next to him to be precise.

It was almost as if there was something that had once been hidden had emerged but she didn't know what _that_ was. "Bicks? You okay?" She whispered.

He nodded slowly before looking up to see the concern on her face. He hated that he'd done that. "Yeah, sorry," He said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes and Lucy saw it, "I'm okay. Just an… eventful night, I guess."

"Gonna tell me about it?" She asked, resting her head on his shoulder again.

"Not today." _Maybe one day…_

"Okay," She said quietly, watching as Bickslow opened the book in his lap and flicked to the page he had previously been on. "Any chance you're free tomorrow night?"

"Most likely."

"Great," Lucy said, picking her head up and pushing herself up to her knees once again, "Come by my place at around 6:30pm, and wear a suit."

He raised an eyebrow, "Going to tell me what for?"

"Nope. It's a surprise." She said as a grin broke out, suddenly finding herself eager for the planned double date. So as she raised herself to her feet, she instantly regretted doing so quickly, feeling her head spin (or was it the room?).

"Careful…" He muttered as the blonde swayed before steadying herself on one of the shelves.

"I'm fine," She said with a slight giggle before bending down, taking one side of his face to tilt it up and kissing him quickly. "Anyway, I need to go lock myself in a dark room for the rest of the day." Because really, if she didn't leave she would probably be happy just sitting on the cold floor of the library for a while longer and she'd really have no way of explaining herself out of that one should anyone actually walk into the library.

So as Bickslow went back to his book, hoping that Lucy having something planned for the following night meant she was done with her game, the blonde weaved her way through the noisy guildhall and made sure of avoiding Levy, just because she'd said she was going to get a book, and well, she hadn't come out with a book. She'd forgotten about that part and it was too late to go back so she just had to hope that the Script mage wouldn't notice that little detail.


	20. Chapter 20

**Okay, honestly, I don't know how I've been able to get so many chapters out so quickly this week, but I'd be lying if I said I'm not having fun writing this, because I am.**  
 **Anyway, time for some badly written... well, stuff. You'll see what I mean. I'm new to writing anything even to related to that, and writing in general, so be kind, please. :P**

* * *

When Bickslow knocked on the door to Lucy's apartment, he expected the door to open with the blonde dressed and ready to go like she usually was when he picked her up. But that's not what happened that evening. No, instead he was greeted by the sight of the blonde with a towel wrapped around her body, hair and makeup done, and holding two coat hangers in front of her, each one with a different dress.

"Which one?" She said quickly, getting to the point.

"Uh…" _Is she really asking me this question? What the fuck?_ So he stared at the dresses she held in each hand. In one hand, she held a white dress that to Bickslow honestly just looked too fucking confusing to wear, just based on the straps alone. In her other hand she held the navy blue dress that he instantly recognised as the one she wore on their first date. "Blue one." He muttered as he pointed to the dress.

So when she slammed the door less than a second later, Bickslow sighed and moved to sit on the railing. He didn't even have time to glance up at the clock and hope that she wouldn't take too long to finish getting ready (not that he knew when or where they were supposed to be going) because the door opened less than a minute after that with Lucy all dressed and ready to go.

"Sorry, I couldn't decide." She said with a smile, pulling the door closed behind her as Bickslow stood.

"Always choose that one."

She raised an eyebrow as they walked down the stairs, briefly raising her eyes to glance towards Bickslow, "How come?" She asked.

Bickslow shrugged, "'Cause it looks good on you," Which, it did, much like everything else she wore, "and you wore it on our first date." He finished quietly with a corner of his mouth upturned.

"I didn't think you'd notice that." And Lucy couldn't help but smile, because if he'd remembered what dress she'd worn from a month ago, then maybe, just maybe, he was falling in love with her, just like she'd realised she was with him, which was something she'd only come to realise that very morning and was still trying to get her head around.

* * *

When the waiter led them to the table at the restaurant Lucy had chosen, Bickslow stood motionless staring at it. It wasn't the fact that the table was located in the somewhat private section of the dining area because that was something they probably should have been making sure of since they'd started dating. There was just more of an importance to do so now that the guild was aware Lucy was dating someone, and Bickslow still wasn't ready to die. Not yet, anyway.

It also wasn't the fact that there was a single white rose on the table with red candles on each side which honestly just made him feel like he had missed a cue of some sort because the entire atmosphere of the restaurant made him feel like he was drowning in the romance of it all. And it wasn't like Bickslow didn't do the whole 'romance' thing, because he thought that when it came down to it, he could be a pretty romantic guy. When he tried, anyway. But the rose and the candles was on a whole new level. He didn't do that kind of romantic. Well, he wouldn't unless Lucy had wanted him to, which he really didn't know and it wasn't the kind of thing he could just ask.

But as he looked around at the other tables in the room and the other diners, he realised each table had the same kind of set up, so he could feel a little bit better about that, at least.

It was the fact there were four chairs. And four menus, one of which the blonde was reading over. When Lucy glanced up from the menu and told him to sit, he did, next to her, of course. Then, leaning over slightly, he asked in a low voice, "Why are there four chairs?"

He missed her mischievous smirk as he glanced at the canal through the large windows just next to them, "Because we need four chairs." Lucy said quietly.

"Last time I checked there was only two of us."

"Not tonight."

And then he froze, staring at the two empty chairs on the opposite side of the table. His mind instantly crossed over into thinking she was into some incredibly kinky shit (what could he say? He'd kept his perverted nature on a leash and it was slowly re-emerging), but he instantly scratched that thought when he remembered who it was he was actually dating. _Nah, not her style_ , he assured himself.

No, he realised it was something much worse. It meant he'd been dragged along on a double date. That, or it was something he couldn't even begin to fathom how terrible it could be.

But a double date. That meant she had planned on telling someone else, because as far as he knew, they didn't really know any other 'couples' where both parties knew about them dating. Hell, at the time, the only couple he could only think of was Evergreen and Elfman (no matter how much they denied having a relationship, the entire guild knew they were in one), and he instantly blanched at the thought of the giant 'man' and the stone goddess herself sitting opposite him for a night.

"I realise I'm not going to be able to get out of this now, but please, _please_ tell me that it's not Ever and Elfman." He begged as Lucy flagged a waiter over to the table.

"It's not, but I'm also not telling you who it actually is." She said with a smile. If she'd told him that it was Levy and Gajeel then it would ruin the surprise. Well, Bickslow's surprise, anyway.

Bickslow groaned as his head hit the table, making the glasses move slightly. She was torturing him and she knew it. He'd never thought the woman was capable of being evil but apparently she was.

So when the waiter came back a few moments later with the wine that Lucy had just ordered before asking Bickslow if he'd wanted his glass filled, he decided that wine wasn't going to be enough to get him through the night. No, he needed something with much more alcohol in it.

They still had a few minutes before Levy and Gajeel were set to arrive so Lucy turned to Bickslow just as he downed the drink he'd ordered as soon as the waiter had placed it on the table, earning a questioning glare from the man as the glass stood empty with all but an ice cube in it.

"I'm sorry for not telling you about this, though." She said quietly, taking a sip of her wine. "I figured that if you'd known you wouldn't have agreed to it…"

"That's true," He mumbled, watching as the waiter disappeared with the empty glass and waited for him to return with another, "But still, if it involves telling someone about us, it would have been nice to know first…" Because really, if any of it ever made its way back to Erza somehow, he'd be living a very short life. He had to know that the people who did know about him dating Lucy weren't going to let that happen.

* * *

Gajeel had been muttering under his breath about dates the entire time they'd been walking to the restaurant. It went unnoticed by the giddy bluenette next to him which was probably for the best since he was certain he'd let 'mother fucking soul bastard' slip a few times.

So when they finally rounded the corner and into the large building on the edge of the canal, he stopped and fiddled with the tie that Levy had made him wear. He hated ties. He hated suits. He hated dates.

But damn it, he didn't hate Levy.

The Script mage's excitement level seemed to rise exponentially as a waitress led them through the dimly lit room filled with couples and groups, all enjoying their romantic evenings. She couldn't tell if she was excited about having an actual, sort of 'proper' date with Gajeel (because in the short time they'd been, well, dating, they'd never once been out to dinner or anything of the sort), or if she was excited about seeing who the mystery man was that had given Lucy a hickey the week before.

"Shrimp, calm down or you're gonna explode." Gajeel whispered as he held onto her arm, still following the waitress. The Dragon Slayer had to admit he was a little anxious to see how she'd take to finding out just who it was Lucy was dating since after all, she'd known the guy liked her a month earlier and she'd never once made the connection.

Levy took a steadying breath, "I know, I know. I'm just so excited!"

And then the waitress stopped and she gestured to the table with the two empty seats by the window. A wicked grin spread across Gajeel's face as he turned to look down at the small woman standing next to him. She'd stopped in her tracks as she stared at who was sitting next to her best friend.

Levy had honestly been expecting to see pink hair, or maybe black, but not _blue and black_. A hundred different questions popped into her head all at once as she slowly unfroze, remembering how to move. And in an instant, she had reached for the blonde's hand and began to drag her towards the bathrooms as she yelped in surprise.

"Fuck me…" Bickslow muttered under his breath as he picked up his glass again.

"That's what she's for, isn't it?" Gajeel said as he took the seat opposite Bickslow, smirk in place.

"Shut up," He muttered again before leaning across the table, "You couldn't have warned me about this today? Or yesterday?" He hissed, keeping his voice low to not draw any more unneeded attention. Because really, he'd expected Gajeel to already know about and just been dragged along. The guy knew everything.

"Strangely enough, Bunny is fucking terrifying, so no!" He hissed back, glaring at the Seith mage before leaning back in his chair to pick up the drinks menu. "What are you drinking?" Because Gajeel was also aware he'd need something other than wine and metal to get him through the night.

Bickslow straightened up, picking up his glass as he swirled the amber liquid around, "Scotch. And a lot of it." He said flatly as he quickly gulped down the rest of it, smiling slightly when he saw the waiter coming back with another glass, as per their agreement.

* * *

"Surprise!" Lucy said awkwardly as Levy shoved her into the bathroom.

"Bickslow?!" The Script mage shrieked, " _Bickslow?!"_

Lucy shrugged as walked along all of the cubicles in the bathroom, making sure that they were alone before she turned with a slight smile. "I know, right?" She shrugged, because really, it was Bickslow – it was a very valid reason to be shocked.

"How long have you two been dating?!"

"A month."

Levy's mouth opened slightly in shock, "A month? You two have been dating a month and I only just found out? Lu!"

"I know! I'm sorry but it's not something I could just tell everyone about, you know?"

"Wait, so…" Levy mumbled as she looked down at the ground, her brain trying to understand everything, "Does anyone else know?" She asked and the blonde nodded. The bluenette's excitement level dropped when she realised she wasn't the first person to know about it, but she also knew her best friend, and if she was only finding out now then there was a very good reason for it. "Who?" She finally asked.

Lucy lifted her fingers as she stared at the ceiling, thinking about who it was that actually knew. "Uh… Well, Laxus, Freed, and Evergreen apparently know, though I don't know how long they've known for." She said, counting off fingers as she went.

And then Levy remembered back to when they'd all just found out Lucy was dating someone and how Evergreen had suggested Bickslow. "So that's why Ever suggested Bickslow!" She said she folded her arms before biting on her thumbnail, wracking her brain for anything else she should have noticed.

"Natsu had to be told not too long ago, and then somehow Gajeel found o-"

"Gajeel knew?!" Levy shrieked.

Lucy nodded before her friend turned and headed out of the bathroom, "Hey, wait!" She called as she followed the bluenette back out to their table.

Gajeel could see the furious Script mage heading towards him from the corner of his vision. He picked up his drink, taking a quick sip. "Oh fuck…" He muttered before she took the empty seat next to him.

"You knew? And you didn't tell me?" She hissed as Gajeel leant in the opposite direction and away from her.

"What? I don't go spreadin' other peoples' secrets…" He replied truthfully. With the amount of things he knew about people in the guild, he could probably get rich from selling them to the highest bidder, whoever that may be. There were plenty of things he shouldn't have heard, but he hears everything. Sometimes more than he wished he did.

Levy pulled her chair in, making herself comfortable as she picked up the menu, "How long have you known then?" She asked quietly and in a surprisingly calmer manner.

"I don't know." He said with a shrug.

As Bickslow and Lucy silently watched the two from the across the table, he leaned in to the blonde's ear and whispered, "So is she going to kill me?"

Lucy giggled quietly as she watched the Script mage suddenly lose her calm once again before turning to Bickslow's ear as he too watched, his eyes suddenly going wide, probably realising just how terrifying the small woman was. "Probably not, but I'm not too sure about Gajeel."

Bickslow shrugged, "Probably wouldn't be the worst thing to happen." He muttered, only to receive an elbow to his arm for apparently even thinking about Gajeel being murdered brutally (probably) by Levy.

And when the waiter had brought out the dinner menus and Levy had stopped yelling (quietly, at that) at Gajeel, Bickslow could feel someone staring at him from across the table as they read their menus. He glanced up to see Levy staring at him and Gajeel staring at her. "What…"

"A month, huh?" She mumbled, her chin pressed into her clasped hands.

"Yep…" Bickslow mumbled, not noticing the slightly surprised look on Lucy's face.

"You two have actually managed to keep it a secret for a month."

He dropped the menu to the table as Lucy looked up from hers, staring intently at her friend. "Yes."

"But _why?_ "

"Why what?" He replied.

"Why keep it a secret?"

Lucy dropped her menu as she looked across the table. "Because he'd probably end up with a few hundred swords through him." She said, taking a sip of her wine. And really, Erza was the only real problem they faced. She would be able to deal with Gray (if and when the time came, and she really hoped it would be a _when_ not an _if_ ), but not Erza.

"That pretty much sums it up." Bickslow said with a shrug. _Couldn't have said it better myself._

"But surely she wouldn't take it that badly…" Levy said quietly as she picked her menu up again.

"She would." They said in unison.

* * *

So as the night went on, rather slowly for Bickslow and Gajeel after the two girls had decided they were to only drink water for the remainder of the night since neither wanted to deal with drunk dates, more questions got asked and answered and slowly, Levy came to realise that the pair wasn't as weird as she'd thought earlier that night.

Sure, the fact they were dating was incredibly weird, but it was a good weird. That was the only way she could describe it. Levy had known Bickslow long enough to know that the way he acted around Lucy was not the way he did in the guild. And it wasn't like it was a complete personality change either. It was close enough that it was still very much Bickslow, but different enough to be able to notice the small changes.

And it was the more Levy thought about it, the more she realised just how much had been subtly different in the last month. It was the small things that most wouldn't notice unless they really thought about it. Things like how he had mostly stopped the crude jokes and hitting on Cana when he was drunk enough (but she flirted back so she'd always thought the two of them had some weird relationship going on).

Or it was how Bickslow had just been generally happier, and she wasn't the only one who had noticed. There'd been a few people commenting on it as of late and generally when he got like that, he had a few pranks lined up. But from what everyone could tell, the guild's prankster had stopped for the time being and some even wondered if he was actually growing up, finally.

Not to mention the fact he'd been reading in the guild for the last two days and that was something Levy had never seen.

Levy thought back to just over a month earlier – to the last guild party, to be precise. She'd remembered Bickslow possibly liking Lucy, but she'd only gotten involved in that to tease her friend for a bit of fun. She'd never once expected Lucy to like him, let alone Bickslow actually take anything seriously. If anything, she'd assumed it was just Bickslow wanting to sleep with her and that wasn't exactly something that surprised her.

But over the course of the night, Levy had seen the way Bickslow had looked at Lucy when she hadn't been looking and the way he smiled when she'd said something positively stupid (which happened more and more often as her glass got refilled) or said something that was just slightly entertaining.

It wasn't the same man who took nothing seriously and as Cana had so eloquently put it the week earlier, didn't date. Bickslow didn't consider Lucy a game and Levy could see that and by the way Gajeel had been watching them over the night, she knew he'd noticed it too.

Bickslow was taking dating Lucy seriously and Levy could see that just from the way he looked at her. Lucy was the reason he'd been happier over the last few weeks and she was the reason he was smiling then, and as she observed, she couldn't help but be happy for her friend, and hell, for Bickslow too.

In their own weird way, they were good. There was something about them that worked, and whether or not Bickslow had realised it yet, he was falling in love with her. She could only hope that Lucy was falling in love with him.

So as what none of them expected to be a surprisingly good night came to an end as they all made their way out of the restaurant and into the Autumn night, they stopped just outside the doors and on the edge of the canal.

Levy huddled into Gajeel's side, her arm wrapped around his middle as his arm draped over her shoulder. "We should do this again!" She exclaimed with a wide grin.

"No." The Dragon Slayer and Seith mage said simultaneously, warranting a short laugh from the blonde.

"Aw, come on. It wasn't that bad." Lucy said, playfully shoving Bickslow's arm.

He shook his head before looking down with a grin in place – the same grin that Levy had been observing all night. "Would have been better if you had let me drink." And it would have, had he not been drinking water for the last 3 hours, but he did have fun; only because Lucy had been positively overflowing with happiness and that was something he'd probably never be able to see enough of.

"Now kiss!" Levy said, giggling as Gajeel groaned, trying his best to turn them around to head home.

"Come on, Shrimp." He mumbled, giving up when she surprisingly wouldn't budge and picking her up to throw her over his shoulder. There was no way he was going to be sticking around for that.

Bickslow chuckled when he saw the look on Levy's face, seeing that she was completely serious. _Ah, what the hell_ , he thought. He was still a little tipsy and he'd honestly been wanting to kiss her all night. So swiftly, he took her face in his hands and tilted his head, pressing his lips against hers, vaguely hearing the squeal from Levy as Gajeel carried her away.

And Bickslow realised that kissing her in the middle of the street was probably not the best idea but he didn't care all that much. He'd missed being able to do _that_ when she'd been playing her game and he was glad that she seemed to be done with it.

Lucy, in her own slightly tipsy state, was feeling a little more daring than usual and she swore she heard a quiet moan come from Bickslow as her tongue slipped against his, something that she never really started – it was usually _her_ following him.

But goodness, she'd missed that. She hated that she'd ever let Mira and Levy convince her to play that stupid 'game' in the first place. She didn't need to get him to chase her and want her, because hell, if he was doing that then she already pretty much had him. Whether or not that was supposed to have happened in just one month's time was irrelevant to her.

As his hands dropped down to her waist and pulled her against him, her hands went up to his head, loosely tangling in the blue hair as he pulled his head away, "Stay at mine again." He whispered, not really making it a question.

She nodded, "Need to stop by my place first, though." Because as much as she enjoyed sleeping in a shirt that was several sizes too large for her, she really preferred her own clothes and she could only pale at the thought of what Virgo would have her wear should she ever ask her spirit for something to sleep in if she hadn't already picked out her own clothes to have her bring.

* * *

Before Bickslow could even hear the sound of his front door being closed after he'd kicked it so, he had Lucy halfway down the hall towards his bedroom. His lips barely left hers; only when he'd pushed her down into the mattress of his bed as she let out a slight giggle before his lips came crashing down again.

He stuck somewhere between wanting her and needing her and he didn't know which he was closer to, not that he really wanted to know anyway.

And just as she sucked his bottom lip into her mouth and he really couldn't help but moan against her mouth, his mind screamed 'Stop' at him over and over. Because somewhere, he knew that if he didn't stop before anything really started, he was going to have a hard time stopping at a later point. Bickslow was well aware that there was a very big possibility that what was going on was heavily influenced by the fact they'd both been drinking, or so he thought, anyway.

So as he rolled off of her, ignoring Lucy's whines of protest as he unbuttoned his shirt, making his way over to his drawers. If it had been anyone else he wouldn't care if they'd been drinking – hell, half the time it made it more fun. But then again, he'd never actually cared about any of them. Everything about Lucy was different, and that meant going about things a different way. As Bickslow was finding out, not all of that was bad.

But Lucy hadn't really wanted to stop. The assertive side of Bickslow that she'd always known was there was finally coming out and she'd be lying if she'd said she wasn't the least bit attracted to it.

That also wasn't to say that she wasn't just a little tiny bit glad it had stopped. She had been drinking after all, only enough to get her slightly tipsy, but she still knew that making out with the guy she had feelings for was probably not the _best_ idea, especially when that someone was Bickslow.

So as she summoned her beloved maid spirit, smiling when she appeared with her chosen pyjamas in hand, along with her hairbrush and toothbrush. Lucy was still a little bit surprised she hadn't swapped her clothes out for something much more risqué, but no, Virgo had been good and stuck with the light pink shorts and the purple tank-top.

And as Bickslow waited, wondering just how long it took to get changed, he got bored and picked up the book that was sitting on the nightstand. He was nearly finished with it by that point but before he could even finish the first page, still making himself comfortable with his back against the headboard, the bathroom door had opened and Lucy had climbed back onto the bed.

"You know," She mumbled, slowly lifting the book from his hands and placing it on the nightstand again before climbing over his lap, smiling at the slightly shocked and confused expression on his face. "I wasn't done with you."

Part of the reason she'd taken so long in the bathroom was because she had been trying to convince herself that she should take what she wanted, just for once. Lucy was rarely one to want things enough to take them, but Bickslow had become one. She knew that if she hadn't been drinking just a little bit then there'd be know way in hell she'd be straddling his lap like she was in that current moment, but she could only remind herself that it was just the liquid courage flowing throughout her veins that let her even do it.

But all fight lost Bickslow when she pressed her lips to his again and in an instant, he'd rolled them over so she was on her back and he was over her. He had to reassure himself he'd control himself. He'd stop before things got out of hand and went somewhere that she didn't want to go. He could do that, he reminded himself.

His hands ran down her sides, pushing up the soft fabric of her tank-top just enough for his hands to sit against her hips as her arms looped around his neck. Just the feel of her soft skin and the way her lips somehow always vaguely tasted like strawberries was enough to put him on the verge of going insane, but he held onto that last sliver of self-control with all he had.

But when she let out the quietest of moans as he sucked on her bottom lip, it was all it had taken for the part of him that was stuck between wanting and needing her to come back out.

His lips trailed across her jaw, smirking slightly when she tilted her head back and into the pillow. As his nose brushed the spot just below her ear she smiled lazily, "No hickeys." She mumbled.

"And what if it's somewhere that won't get you in trouble?" Bickslow mumbled between light kisses, starting just below her ear and down to her shoulder. It was all about creativity now.

But Lucy couldn't even answer, not that she'd needed to because somehow, Bickslow already knew the answer. This was the man that knew exactly what he was doing and it came from what Lucy could only assume was years of experience of doing… well, that. Even though Bickslow was usually confident, the confidence he had then had a different aura to it. It was almost arrogance, but holy hell, could he pull it off, and she figured it would probably be the only time she'd consider it even remotely attractive.

"Like… here." He murmured, pushing the thin strap over her shoulder to the side before sucking on the soft skin gently, not long enough to leave much of a mark.

"Maybe…" Lucy whispered before pulling his head back up and capturing his lips in another searing kiss.

But it didn't last long, and as he pulled his head back, she saw the smirk that was firmly in place before he was down by her hips. She could hear her heart beating in her ears and she felt like her face was on fire. Lucy could vaguely recognize that things were quickly progressing and heading towards something she still wasn't quite ready for. Granted, it had crossed her mind once in the last week, but she wasn't there. Not yet. She knew she had a line, somewhere, but they weren't there. Yet.

"Maybe… here?" Bickslow murmured against the side of her hip, eliciting a small gasp from the blonde.

And back up.

That last sliver of control that was very quickly being lost was all that kept him from seriously doing things that he'd honestly wanted to do to her – _with_ her – for a long time.

But they weren't there. Yet.

And then, her hands started to wander on their own accord, down over his bare chest and his sides, until she reached the waistband of his boxers. They hovered there for a while and she was aware of what she was doing, and even though she didn't really know why she'd done it, she was simultaneously getting nervous and excited. She could see the line that she didn't really want to cross and it was coming up fast.

Bickslow could feel her hands against his hips, and he was okay with that. They were fine there. But then, when she tentatively slipped her fingers past the elastic, he stopped. That was the line that wouldn't be crossed. Not yet.

And even though there was a part of his body that really disagreed with himself on the matter of stopping, his brain (thankfully) won that battle. He grabbed her wrists, pulling them away before pinning them to her sides. "We're not doing this." He murmured, finally sitting up and rolling to his back.

But Lucy was honestly glad it hadn't progressed. Even though there was a small part of her that had wanted it to, she knew, even in her less-than-sober state, that she didn't want it yet. That was the key word – _yet_.

* * *

 **Is it time for me to come out of the hole I've been hiding in now? I hope it wasn't too bad. You know, it's still getting there, and I'm aware things have kind of jumped into new territory, relationship wise, but that kind of just happened. I feel like I need to explain a few more things in the next chapter, but I have more things to deal with in that.**

 **Can I just say that either in the next chapter (21) or the chapter after that (22), there's definitely going to be some citrus-y good(bad)ness, so don't say I didn't warn you. That might take me a little longer to get out since I'm going to be going over it a million times to make sure it's not god awful.**

 **Anyway, as usual, I hope you enjoyed the chapters from today. :)**

 **\- April**


	21. Chapter 21

**I... don't even know how I'm still functioning at this point. I've been sitting here with soundtrack playlists on all day, every day (when you study music and music theory for 7+ years, you become a music nerd and instrumental music has always been my weakness), mainly the 'emotional' and 'heart-wrenching' ones, and honestly, I think that might be the part of my inspiration LOL.**

 **Anyway... I think I have a new record. Three chapters in one day. Don't be surprised if Ch 22 goes up today or tomorrow haha.**

 **With that being said, I apologise in advance.**

* * *

September came to an end as October rolled in, bringing a slight Autumn chill with it. The days following their double date had been spent in a sort of euphoric state of bliss, partly because there had been a hell of a lot of making out. No dates or sleepovers, just lots of kissing and a whole lot of not being able to know whether it was a want or need kind of thing.

Bickslow wasn't complaining about it and neither was Lucy but the difference was that each time after that night where the line had come running up, they were able to stop before it got even remotely close to being crossed. They'd come to a silent understand that it shouldn't and wouldn't be crossed. Not yet, anyway.

Although Lucy was incredibly close to completely wanting to. There was still a small part of her that was telling her to wait because she really wanted to make sure that they were both serious about what they were doing, and they had still yet to have that conversation and she really didn't want to. They were happy just dating. The need to have that conversation wasn't great either because they'd both admitted to them themselves that they were taking it seriously enough to avoid talking about it.

But Bickslow also knew that each time they'd been together since then, that line was getting pushed further and further back. He realised he'd been slowly testing her limits, seeing what he could get away with before she made them stop, and so far, that had only happened once, but she'd ended up with a hickey just below where her more conservative shirts usually covered her breasts so it was more of a win for him than her.

There was also the problem of them being less careful than they needed to be. After finding Bickslow in the library alone once again, Lucy had pushed him to the back corner in the section that no one ever visited, and well, it hadn't taken very long for her to be pushed up against one of the shelves with his mouth on her throat.

But it also hadn't taken very long for them to get caught. It had been by Freed, so it honestly could have been worse. Bickslow was able to laugh it off because of his friend's flustered expression, but Lucy made it clear there was to be no more of _that_ happening in the guild, and Bickslow could only agree since after all, had it been anyone else, Erza would surely find out.

And then Natsu had made a surprise visit (surprise to Bickslow, not so much to Lucy as it turns out) to Lucy's apartment one night after he'd run into her (somewhat on purpose, he'd have to admit) on his way home from the guild, much like she had been. So imagine Bickslow's surprise when he pulled his lips away from the blonde's while leaning on her bed (honestly, he didn't know how they'd got there, but it had happened) and looked up to see a Dragon Slayer sitting in the window.

Oh yeah, and then there was Happy to deal with who was flying just behind Natsu, his little blue paw over his mouth as he held back his mischievous laugh. Bickslow finally understood why Lucy called him the devil cat occasionally.

So as Natsu and Happy finally climbed through the window to join the pair on the bed, Natsu glaring at Bickslow and Happy flying around singing 'she llllllikes him!' over and over again, Bickslow went out the window, jumping down onto his babies that had lined up just below it in the chaos that followed from being, well… caught. He'd made it out just in time to avoid being set on fire and was just able to make out Lucy yelling about how apparently no one was able to use a door.

And her apartment at that point had honestly been chaotic. Happy was mad at Natsu for lying about Bickslow and Lucy and Natsu was mad at Bickslow and Lucy was mad at everyone.

They quickly got over it when Lucy offered the damn cat a fish just to get him to keep his mouth shut about it, and he obliged. Anything for fish.

But then as the guild started preparing for Fantasia, almost everyone getting involved in some way since it was the first time the guild was taking part in the festival since the core members had gone missing on Tenrou Island, Bickslow became very distant very quickly.

So himself, Laxus, and Freed had decided to leave for the week leading up to the dreaded day of horrible memories without a single word to Lucy, and he felt bad for leaving like that (even though it had been his idea to find a job to get them out of Magnolia for a bit), but he also couldn't talk to her.

Evergreen didn't seem to mind the boys all leaving. In fact, she seemed quite happy they'd left, leaving her to work on her own part of the parade in peace.

Lucy sat in the guild all week, watching everyone work and make themselves busy around her. With so many new members from them winning the Grand Magic Games, there were almost too many people and not enough things for people to do. So she wouldn't be taking part in that year's parade, and she was fine with that. She'd be able to just enjoy the festivities for the first time, and hopefully, she'd be able to do so with Bickslow – assuming he was back by the day the festival came around.

* * *

And so, on the day of the dreaded festival (in Bickslow's opinion), Lucy walked into the guild in high spirits, enjoying the buzz from all of the energy surrounding her. In the morning, she helped add the finishing touches to some of the floats as she waited for the Miss Fairy Tail Contest to begin. She wasn't taking part in that year's contest, purely because there was so point. Between Erza and Mira both entering again, there was no way she'd have even a chance of winning.

But she was fine with that. She was fine with just enjoying her day and waiting for Bickslow to get his lazy ass out of bed and come to the guild. The blonde knew they'd returned since she'd spotted Freed helping Evergreen with something, but she didn't know the guy had no intentions of leaving his apartment that day, let alone his bed since he'd left before she could even fully realise that he'd been distant. To her, everything was fine.

So Lucy waited, then waited some more. The Miss Fairy Tail Contest had come to an end, and even though the results wouldn't be released for at least another week, everyone in the audience knew that Erza had won. She wore a cat costume for crying out loud.

Bickslow never came in to the guild, and when Lucy had gotten bored of waiting around for him to maybe/maybe not show, she gave up and headed towards his apartment. She hadn't seen him for a week and she missed him, she'd be lying if she said she hadn't.

Being that it was early afternoon, the festival was in full swing. Thousands upon thousands of people had flocked to Magnolia and each person was enjoying what the town had to offer in terms of entertainment. Between the children laughing and pointing at the large balloons atop the buildings or the ribbons that were tied to the trees, Lucy couldn't help but smile. This was why she loved Magnolia and why she loved her guild. There was always something to smile and laugh about and she really couldn't help but think of Bickslow (it didn't help that she was already thinking of him, given that she was on her way to his apartment). He was always smiling and laughing about something.

When Bickslow could hear the faint knock on his front door, he ignored it, pressing his face into the pillow even more. Whoever it was, if he ignored it, they'd leave him alone. He wasn't in the mood for people, especially not on that day.

"Bicks?"

He groaned into the pillow when he heard her voice. Of all people, she was the one he couldn't deal with. The last week had been hard on him – harder than he ever could have imagined. Between self-loathing and missing her, he felt terrible. Terrible wasn't even the right word, because he didn't know what to call it.

Bickslow had let himself forget something crucial – the fact that he'd hurt her, one too many times. He'd been too happy with her to remember the fact that on that very day, technically 8 years earlier, he'd done some things he really wasn't proud of.

He didn't deserve her – that much he knew, but at the same time, he was too selfish to leave her, let her be with someone who actually deserved her and wasn't, well… him. He cared about her too much to do that, and even though he knew she'd forgiven him for everything, he couldn't forgive himself.

"It's like two o'clock, what are you still doing in bed?" She asked, laughing as she knelt on the bed.

He didn't care that it was two o'clock in the afternoon, not one bit.

"Come on, get up," Lucy said, lightly shoving his back as he faced away from her. "Come and enjoy the festival with me."

"No." He mumbled into the pillow. He couldn't see how the smile had instantly left her face and she stared at his back in confusion.

"Don't you like the festival?" She asked quietly, leaning down to rest her head in the crook of his neck. From that angle, she could see his face and how his eyes remained closed. Her hand came to rest on his arm and she could feel just how tense he was. She didn't understand it but she felt like there was something going on that he wasn't telling her about.

But he opened his eyes, looking back at her through the corner of his vision. "Please don't." He said in a low whisper. He hated that she was so close and yet couldn't reach out and touch her because more than anything, that's all he wanted to do. Just to be able to kiss her and forget what he'd done once upon a time.

Because that's what happened when he was around her. Everything that hurt, usually got better. Because of her. She was his source of happiness and she didn't even know it.

But not that time. She wasn't making him happy; she was making him feel worse, and that was something he couldn't let her know. Despite knowing he was being a selfish bastard by not wanting to leave her – not wanting her to leave him – he couldn't bear to see or think about how much she'd be hurt, just from knowing that he was making him feel worse. He had to keep that from her, but he also had to get her to leave and that was one of the things that hurt the most.

Lucy sat up abruptly having seen how dark his eyes had gotten. She'd noticed before that the red always got darker when he wasn't in the best of moods but that then had almost scared her. Lucy was perceptive, and even though Bickslow was always hiding what he really felt, she swore she saw a flicker of pain in his eyes.

She wasn't even going to bother asking him what was wrong because she knew he'd say nothing, he always did. But that didn't stop her from wondering just what it was that had made Bickslow like that – for him to obviously not want her there, and that hurt because what if, what if _she_ was the reason he was hurt? She could only hope that that wasn't the case.

So instead, she'd give Bickslow his space since she knew he needed it. So she wouldn't be able to enjoy the festival with him; it wasn't the end of the world and she could always enjoy it by herself or with her team before they had the parade. Lucy had only thought that it would be a good way for them to spend some time together. The streets were crowded enough that day for them to avoid drawing enough attention to themselves with all of the focus being drawn to the festivities themselves.

"Well," She said quietly, sitting back on her heels on the bed, "I feel like you don't want me here right now, but maybe you'll come out for the parade?" She whispered. She could only hope his mood would improve by the evening.

 _No chance_. "Maybe." He lied, mumbling into the pillow again.

A weak smile spread across her face before leaning back down, pressing a kiss to his cheek softly, "I'll be back later either way."

"…Fine." But he wasn't going to be here, especially not if she was coming back. He'd be out, somewhere, probably trying to convince himself to do the somewhat selfless thing and let her be with an actually decent guy, even though that was the absolute last thing he wanted. He still wanted to be that actually decent guy that deserved her, but the truth was that he'd never come to close to that.

But for the moment, he could only be glad she was leaving him alone. He still had a few hours to sulk in his bed before he'd have to avoid her and remain oblivious to the fact he'd hurt her just by his words in the space of a few minutes.

* * *

No matter how much Lucy tried, she couldn't bring herself to enjoy walking around Magnolia in an attempt to enjoy her afternoon so it didn't take very long for end up back in the guild, sitting at the empty bar as her finger ran around the rim of her glass.

She really couldn't help but feel like she was the reason as to why Bickslow was acting the way he was. Maybe, just maybe, it meant he didn't want to see her anymore, and God, did she hope that that wasn't the case, because she didn't want to stop seeing him.

She didn't even want to think about the possibility of them, well… breaking up, because honestly, it would probably break her heart. She knew that if that did end up happening then it would be her own fault for letting herself get so attached in just a month and a half, but she couldn't stop herself from doing so.

Occasional glances were sent towards the bar from those who were running around the guild, making sure everything was in order for Fantasia. People were wise to avoid the bar and Lucy was honestly grateful. She wanted to be alone, but she didn't want to go home.

But Laxus had never been wise. He'd watched the blonde from where he stood on the second floor. He may be silent, but he wasn't stupid. He watched his guild, he knew what went on. He also knew that his dumbass of a best friend was the reason the Celestial Spirit mage was sulking at the bar considering he'd just put up with _him_ sulking for the last week. "They're fuckin' perfect for each other," he said bitterly under his breath before turning for the stairs.

Lucy glanced up slightly when she felt a presence next to her, not in the least expecting to see Laxus of all people leaning with his elbow on the bar whilst looking back over the guild.

"What's wrong with you?" He mumbled, glancing down at Lucy.

Lucy shrugged, "Nothing. Why do you care anyway?" Because it was unlike Laxus to care about how she was feeling.

"I don't, but you're kind of making it impossible for anyone to come to the bar…"

"Oh…"

Laxus looked over the guild once more before glancing down to Lucy again and lowered his voice, "I'm going to assume that you just went to see Bicks," He took her shrug and muttering something incoherent under her breath as a yes, "Listen, I know it seems like he doesn't like you right now, but that's not the case."

"Sure seems like it." Lucy mumbled.

"He hates himself, not you."

She looked up from the glass, "But even if that's true, I don't see why. He won't even talk to me…"

"You're a smart girl; you'll figure it out on your own," Laxus paused, ignoring the fact he'd just complimented the blonde before leaning down closer to her ear, "But seriously, I'll kill you if you tell anyone about this conversation." Because really, if people were to find out he cared about his guild mates then he'd be screwed. He had a reputation to uphold.

And she smiled weakly at it before whispering, "Thanks, Laxus." She still didn't understand how she was supposed to figure out why Bickslow apparently hated himself, especially when he didn't even want to talk to her.

She just had to hope he'd be fine by the evening. Fine enough, anyway.

* * *

But he wasn't. He hadn't even been in his apartment when she'd come back that evening and Lucy didn't know where he'd gone. He just wasn't there.

So as she walked around the now empty streets of Magnolia aimlessly, staring down at the ground, all she could think about was how Laxus had been wrong. To her, it really did seem like Bickslow didn't like her anymore. Hell, it meant she had been wrong, because up until the day he'd left a week earlier, she'd thought they were fine.

But maybe, just maybe, she'd been missing something. Maybe she got too attached to see the signs? Who knows. All she knew was that she'd been wiping the tears from her face for the last half an hour.

She just kept walking, not heading anywhere specific. She could hear the crowds that had amassed around the central path, all waiting for the return of the Fantasia parade. She should have been one of the people down there, waiting for her friends and her guild mates, but she couldn't.

She just kept walking until she couldn't hear the crowds and the tears had stopped.

She kept walking until the five, small totems that were distinct to only one person floated down in front of her, joining together and lining up just above the ground. Lucy looked around at the buildings, a small glimmer of hope just from knowing Bickslow was somewhere nearby. His babies never strayed too far from him.

She looked over every building and shop sign in her vision, only stopping when she saw the familiar architecture of the town's most preferred toy shop. She could see the shape of Bickslow sitting by the flag pole at the very top, his back to her and looking over the town.

Lucy looked down at the five dolls again. They seemed to be waiting for her to get on, but she'd never done so on her own. The few times Bickslow had held her were fine, but on her own, it was something else.

But as she glanced up towards the building again, she felt like she was beginning to understand everything, just a tiny bit. She didn't just want to understand a tiny bit; she wanted to understand it all. And hell, if it really was going to be the end of whatever it was they were doing, then she wanted to know why. So with caution, she stepped up onto the totems, shaking slightly as the two on either end separated, coming to rest under her palms as they lifted her slowly into the air.

* * *

Bickslow didn't know how or why he'd come to be sitting atop the hobby shop, looking out over the town with his legs dangling over the edge, but it seemed kind of ironic that the place he'd ended up going to to avoid Lucy was the one place everything had started.

He'd watched the sunset from where he sat and how each district in Magnolia lit up in a clockwise rotation. He could see how the central path was lit up like a Christmas tree and when he looked up, he could see the stars that lit up the sky.

More than anything, he wanted to know what to do. He'd hoped that getting out of his house for a while would help him figure it out, but like he had been all week, he was having a hard time with it.

But fuck, the worst part was that he knew the _right_ thing to do was to let her be with someone who deserved her, because that wasn't him. He just didn't want to let her go, and he knew he was being selfish. What could he say? He was a selfish person.

But even though it hurt him to admit it, he was slowly beginning to accept that he had to.

For her.

Because for her, he'd really be willing to do anything, and if that meant letting her go and be with someone she could actually love one day – because that was never going to be him, he knew that – then he'd do it, no matter how much it hurt him.

But Bickslow still didn't want to talk to her. Not yet, at least.

No, just for one more night, he wanted to prolong what he was calling the inevitable and think about the last month and a half.

The last month and a half where he'd honestly been happier than he ever thought he could have been. And sure, there'd been a few times where it had been a little rough, namely regarding his magic, but they'd got past it.

In the last month in a half, Bickslow had changed more than he thought was humanly possible, but he liked to think it was for the better. And it was because of her.

In the last month in a half, Bickslow had realised just how happy she made him, and honestly, just thinking about that fact made him just a little bit happy, even though in that moment, he was more miserable than he thought he could ever be. Every time he looked at her when she wasn't looking, he couldn't help but grin. At her, with her, whatever. Just _her_ was enough to make him smile by that point. And her laugh – Oh God, did Bickslow love her laugh. Whether she was laughing at him or with him or something else, it didn't matter.

But every time he looked her when she wasn't looking, or even when she was looking, really, he could feel his heart start beating just a tiny bit faster. More than anything, he still wanted to fall in love with her.

But it wasn't a matter of waiting for it to happen anymore. It wasn't going to happen one day. Any day. Ever.

One day was never going to come, because he had to let her go. He didn't deserve her.

And boy, if he didn't already hate himself for the things he'd done in the past, he hated himself even more for being so stupid. He'd been stupid to believe that one day, he'd get to the point where she was actually his, or that she actually loved him. It was stupid.

Bickslow didn't date.

The entire thing was really just a disaster waiting to happen.

That's what he had to tell himself, at least, because there was still a part of him that was telling him to just go, 'Fuck it.'

But he couldn't. That just wouldn't be fair.

Bickslow had been so preoccupied with his thoughts that he didn't notice his babies go missing for a while. They did that occasionally, usually when he was lost in his thoughts, as he'd learned. There wasn't anything he could do about it. Usually they just went and picked on some kid or something.

He shrugged it off though, just because he honestly didn't care.

So he leant back, his back resting against the cold stone so he could stare up at the stars that got brighter the later it got. One day, he was going to learn how to point out the constellations.

One day.

And so he stared up at the sky for God knows how long. He didn't think it was very long, but after a while, he saw something moving in the corner of the vision and he lifted his head to see the one person he didn't want to see sit down on the edge, her legs dangling over next to his.

 _Fuck_.

* * *

 **Ruining my own life, one chapter at a time. Like, I had this part planned out from the beginning, but it wasn't supposed to turn out like this LOL. I feel like it got really depressing, really fast.**

 **\- April**


	22. Chapter 22

Time seemed to have slowed down as they sat there, staring at the town they called home for what felt like forever. They were both aware of what was going to happen, but neither wanted it.

But Bickslow really needed to get it over with, because the longer he sat there, the more he was inclined to just go, 'Fuck it.' But that wasn't the right thing to do. He had to believe that the right thing to do was letting her go, no matter how much it hurt him to do it.

"You shouldn't be here." Bickslow mumbled as he looked at the blonde next to him from the corner of his eye.

"Why?" She replied quickly, not looking up.

"Because I don't want you here."

She could feel the sting of tears in her eyes as her knuckles tightened on the edge of the stone by her legs. "So… you don't want me then?" She said, holding back the tears.

 _You couldn't be more wrong,_ he thought, looking away. He knew she was so close to leaving; close to it being done and he wouldn't be able to do anything about it. It was what had to be done.

Lucy took his silence as a 'yes', bringing her knees up. "So that's it? It's that simple?" She whispered as she stood. Because if that was the case, then she didn't think there was anything she could do about it.

But Bickslow still couldn't answer. He was ready to let her believe whatever it is she wanted to believe, just because he couldn't lie.

"Right then…" She whispered again, wiping her hand across her cheek as she turned. It was done; over. She didn't know how it had happened so suddenly. Maybe he realised he was bored? Because after all, everything was a game to Bickslow. But she stopped, looking over her shoulder before she could even walk away, "You know, it's funny. I thought I was actually falling in love with you. Guess I was stupid." And she didn't care how stupid it sounded, because they were done; there was no point of hiding it.

Hey, maybe she'd be able to look back on it one day and laugh about it.

And just like that, everything stopped for Bickslow. He knew at that moment that there was no way he was going to be able to let her leave like that – at least not until he'd explained it, because fuck, was he regretting everything.

So his hand caught her wrist before she could get too far away. "Wait." He said, barely a whisper.

"Bicks, please…" She used her free hand to wipe away the tears, not even trying to hold them back anymore. Everything just hurt, way too much.

And he could hear it in her voice - just how much he'd hurt her. Hurting her had never been part of his plans, but he hadn't thought it through completely. It was too late for that now, but he could at least try and make it better. "Just sit, please. Let me explain it."

"There's nothing to explain. I get it."

He finally looked up, finally seeing her face that made his chest hurt all the more, "Trust me, I do. Please."

Even though Lucy had no idea what could possibly need to be explained, she sat back down anyway, because she still cared about Bickslow even though the man had essentially just broken her heart in two.

He ran a hand through his hair as he took a shaky breath. There was no way the things he was about to say would be easy to get out, but they needed to be said, just because he didn't think he'd be able to cope with Lucy hating him. Maybe, just maybe, if she understood why, then it wouldn't be as bad as it currently was.

"This is going to be really hard for me, so please, just bear with me for a bit." He said quietly. He waited for her to nod slowly before he went on, taking another shaky breath. "This… this isn't because I don't want you, because fuck, it's the complete opposite of that; it's because I don't deserve you."

"What…?"

Bickslow sighed, "I just don't deserve you. I've done some pretty terrible things to you in the past, and yet somehow, you're still here and I don't know why. I let myself forget everything I'd done, forget everything that had happened on _this day_ and I just…" He trailed off, looking down at the small cracks in the stone beneath him. "You deserve someone who isn't me." He murmured.

Lucy raised her hand to touch his arm, and just before her fingers could feel the fabric, she pulled her hand back. She had to remind herself she couldn't do that now, even though she wanted to.

But more than anything, she was mad at Bickslow. Not for breaking her heart, but instead for acting like he got to decide who _she_ deserved. That was for her to decide and her alone.

"I hate myself more than you could know right now because for the last month and a half, I let myself believe that I was good enough for you."

And that was where Lucy drew the line. Even though she just wanted to go back home and curl up into a ball and cry herself to sleep, she couldn't, because she couldn't sit there and listen to Bickslow say that he hated himself.

"Bickslow, you don't get to choose who I deserve, and you also don't get to sit there feeling guilty over things that happened _eight years ago_."

"It was only one year for us…" He mumbled, shifting uncomfortably.

"Technicality," She corrected him, "The point is, it's in the past. I thought you knew I forgave you for that. Everyone has."

"I know, but it's still stuck in my head. I can't just move on and pretend like it didn't happen." _Because you'll constantly remind me of it and I don't think I can handle that._

"Then don't pretend it didn't happen. Find a way to turn the bad memories into good ones."

He leant back again, staring up at the stars once again. "Nothing good happened then."

And momentarily, Lucy could forget just how upset she was, and it was all because Bickslow was the one who really needed things explained to him. Without thinking, she sat up to move to straddle his hips and her hands to each side of his face as she ignored the confused expression on his face.

"You met me on this day, didn't you?" And sure, it had been under pretty terrible circumstances, but that didn't matter.

"Yeah… which is why this day kind of sucks…"

Lucy shook her head, "If you hadn't met me then, then maybe we wouldn't be here, and I don't know about you, but I was pretty happy over the last month and a half."

The corners of his mouth upturned slightly, because she was right. Maybe something good had come out of that day? But then the slight smile he had was lost when he thought about just how happy he had been with her, but that was gone, and it was his fault. "You have no idea how happy you made me." He whispered sadly, because he already missed that happiness.

And Lucy didn't like seeing Bickslow sad, just like any normal person doesn't enjoy seeing someone they care for sad. Even though she knew the pain was still there; that he'd broken her heart, she still felt like she could forgive him, just because she wanted to believe that there was a slight chance that maybe, just maybe, it didn't have to end that way.

The way Lucy understood it was that Bickslow was doing what he _thought_ was right for her, even though he didn't want to. What Bickslow didn't realise was that Lucy didn't think that was the right thing, because she still thought that was Bickslow.

"Do I still make you happy?" She asked, because if she still was able to make Bickslow happy, then she couldn't see a reason for it to actually be the end.

"Yes." _And you always will, because as long as you're happy, I'm happy._

"Do you still want me?"

"You know I do."

"And do you deserve me?"

"No."

Lucy frowned slightly. Even though she hated his answer, she wasn't done with her questions. One terrible answer she could deal with.

"But do I deserve you?" Because she felt like she did.

And Bickslow couldn't answer that with a simple yes or no, because neither really worked. But regardless or whether they worked or not, he knew that neither was the answer she wanted. "I can't decide that." And she smiled at that, just for a second.

"So why did you break my heart?"

And suddenly, all of the pain was back. He was painfully aware of how much he'd hurt her, just from that day alone, and it had really never been his intention. He closed his eyes, wanting to shut out the sight of her above him. He could see in her eyes that it was really the truth – that he'd broken her heart, and he was at the point where he was so close to losing his control.

He was a mess right then, on the verge of being overwhelmed from everything he'd caused and that meant losing control, and he still didn't want Lucy to ever have to see that.

It was the same thing as with his parents – the sudden tightness in his chest and not being able to breathe, heart beating a million miles an hour. But it wasn't his parents he missed then, it was Lucy.

"Because I thought it was the right thing to do." Bickslow mumbled, still not opening his eyes.

"You thought it was the right thing to do? To break my heart?" And she didn't believe that, she just needed him to see what it sounded like to her. Because once he could see things from her perspective, then maybe, just maybe, they'd be able to get through it.

And hearing her say like that made him realise just how absolutely stupid he had been. He pushed his head back into the stone as he covered his eyes with his forearm. "God, I'm so sorry. I never… I just… I'm sorry." He blurted out as he tried to steady his breathing.

"Bicks?" She said quietly as she watched how his chest was rising and falling quickly and how he'd pressed his arm across his eyes. She'd read bits and pieces of the book on Seith magic and even though a lot of it she didn't understand because she still had a lot to learn about his magic, the one part she'd understood was where it mentioned the most common reasons for Seith mages to ever lose control, the most common cause being when the mage experienced a wide range of strong emotions in a short period of time. They'd lose their focus and thus their control. She could only assume that's what was happening, and she was worried. "Eyes?" She whispered.

All he could do was nod slowly. He knew she'd been reading the book because she'd brought up small facts every now and then that she thought were interesting, but he never knew just how much she'd read.

But Lucy still trusted him, even though she was witnessing him lose his control. It didn't look pleasant – he almost looked like he was in pain and she hated seeing him like that.

"Bicks, look at me." She said quietly, trying to lift his arm.

"No."

So when he resisted, she stopped but kept her hand around his wrist. "Bickslow, please. I trust you." She whispered, because that was the point – she still trusted him. She'd read enough of the book to know that more often than not, it wasn't the actual Figure Eyes activating, it was just their ability to be able to see souls being activated, and that was one of the main misconceptions about Seith magic. Because that part of their magic was inextricably linked to Figure Eyes. Many who didn't know about it just assumed that it was their Figure Eyes and that being able to see souls was a constant thing, when in reality, it wasn't.

Bickslow didn't know she knew that much about it. Most of the time it was just easier to go along with what people assumed and since not many people cared about Seith magic, it didn't matter if he corrected the few people that had ever asked him about that, because one person trying to prove that everything the average person believed about Seith magic was wrong wasn't going to have an effect on the stigma that had been around for decades, even centuries. There was just no point.

But just hearing that she trusted him was enough to calm him down a tiny bit, because Lucy could always somehow make things better. Somehow.

"Look at me," She whispered again, lifting his arm slowly when he finally let her before her hands returned to the sides of his face. "Please."

He knew the difference between his types of magic so he knew he wasn't going to take control of her should he open his eyes, but it was still never fun to experience.

But he still wasn't going to argue with her. Not anymore. He was done with doing anything that would come to close to hurting her.

So Lucy watched as his eyes slowly opened, blinking a few times as he adjusted to the slight glare that he always got when he first started using it. She smiled slightly when he finally looked her in the eyes and for the first time, she got to see how different his eyes were when he was using his magic.

She'd always loved the shade of the red they were and how the concentric rings were barely a shade darker, but she looked at how bright the green was too, and how if she looked closed enough, she could see how it was more of an overlaid colour with the red undertone peeking through.

He'd never made much of point of using his magic unless he was in a fight, but he'd also never had someone so close to him whilst he was using it, let alone looking him directly in the eyes. No one had ever done that before because he'd never let them. No one apart from her.

And somehow, just by the way she as smiling and looking at him right then, he felt like that he actually deserved to be with her, just a little bit. He'd broken her heart yet she was still there.

Slowly, he lifted a hand to cup her face, his thumb brushing across the top of her cheek. He honestly didn't think he'd be able to let her go like that, not with the ways things were in that moment. And even though deep down, he knew he didn't deserve her and probably never would, he still wanted her; more than she could know. Bickslow could only hope that wanting her would be enough, that it wasn't too late to fix things because hell, had he fucked up.

He guided her face down, his other hand going to the other side of her face as her lips finally touched his softly. He didn't think they'd ever shared a kiss so full of emotion, so tender, and he didn't want it to end. But he pulled away, just enough to whisper, "I'm so sorry."

Suddenly, there was a loud booming noise coming from above and they both sat up to see what it was. Spelled in the night sky above the central path were the words 'Fairy Tail', crackling away between the fireworks and the guild logo made of fire, signalling the end of Fantasia. And she smiled softly, because when she turned back to Bickslow, he was smiling slightly at the same sight.

"Bickslow…" She whispered, looking down at her feet hanging over the edge of the stone sign. "I don't… I don't want this to be the end."

And even though they were the words he wanted to hear, to let him know that they could find a way to fix things, there was still a part of him that didn't believe it would work. "But I've hurt you. How can you even stand to be around me?" He whispered sadly.

"Because I know that you're sorry, and I… I have to believe that if we try, we'll be able to get past this."

"I…" _She wants to get past this? How, how in the world will that ever happen?_ "I don't think I'll be able to, even though I want to."

"Then let me help you, so we can _together_."

 _Together_.

The word echoed in his mind, over and over. Because if she was there with him, he felt like everything would be okay. Because if they were together, he felt like he didn't have to worry about anything else, because she would be all that matters.

"How do you do it?" He muttered, seeing the blank expression on her face at his question, he continued, "How do you make me feel like I'm good enough for you? After everything."

And she smiled, because slowly, she realised she was getting through to Bickslow, and they were one step closer to being able to find a way to get through things. "Because maybe you are?

"I really wish I was." _Because if I was, then everything would be so much easier and none of this would have happened._

"But what about me?" She asked, moving to rest her head on his shoulder as they both continued to watch the fireworks, "What if I feel like I deserve you?" Because somehow, she felt like _she_ deserved _him_.

"Then you're an idiot, 'cause you deserve someone better than me." He mumbled.

"I don't want someone better than you."

And slowly but surely, Bickslow was beginning to see just how much Lucy was trying – trying to help him understand how much he meant to her. But he'd still gone and screwed it all up, because he was an idiot, and he knew that. Even though he'd made things worse, he realised she was willing to trust him and forgive him – again.

Because she'd been falling in love with him.

"Did you mean it?" He mumbled, because if she really had been, then maybe, if they could fix it, the dream of one day wouldn't be, well… that; a dream.

"Mean what?"

"Were you really falling in love with me?"

Lucy sat up abruptly with a short laugh, wiping away the dried tears. She felt silly – you don't just tell someone you're falling in love with them, not unless it's said as parting words, which when she'd uttered it, that's what they'd been. And that wasn't even the worst part. The worst part was that even though he'd broken her heart and she felt like just being able to talk it through was helping it be mended, she still didn't think she'd stopped falling in love with Bickslow. Because even though he'd been the cause for her pain then, she felt like he was still the reason for _her_ happiness.

She didn't want someone better than Bickslow because she still felt like there wasn't anyone better than Bickslow. And maybe, just maybe she was feeling that way because she herself was a mess, but over everything, she still didn't want things to end. In such a short amount she'd grown so attached to him and even though he'd broken her heart, somewhere deep down and somehow, she knew that he could fix it too.

"It was stupid… I shouldn't have said it…" She mumbled.

And with each second passing by, Bickslow could feel things already starting to get better. Only slightly, but better. His hand came to rest softly against her cheek as he turned her to face him again, and he kissed her. He couldn't have stopped himself if he tried, because even though she hadn't actually said 'yes' or 'no', he knew that she had been falling in love with him, because Lucy didn't lie. He knew that about her.

A surge of happiness went through him. She'd been falling in love with him. _Him_ , of all people. It was the thing he'd been hoping for since the beginning yet never truly expected her to come close to it.

But fuck, he still didn't want things to end either, and he realised he probably never would. He wanted to fix things. He was going to fix things, he knew that. He was going to be selfish and hold on to what he wanted: her.

Bickslow realised he'd been wrong. He'd been wrong about lots of things, but one of the most important things was that he'd been wrong to think that she was the reason for his pain that day. Lucy could and would never be the cause of pain. Nothing was her fault. It was all his. He'd been hurting himself – trying to convince himself that letting her go was the right thing, when he knew now that it wasn't. He'd been hurting himself by remembering the bad things. The things he'd done.

But those things were in the past. The past didn't matter, because right then, she was there and she was still with him. Even after everything.

And even though it hurt, he was smiling, because she was there, and she was the source of his happiness. She always would be.

Bickslow knew then that he'd be able to move on from the past. And sure, it would take a while which he accepted, but she'd be there helping him through it. She'd help him remember the good things – like the fact that he had met her on that day, and even though back then he'd thought she was weak, he knew that he was the weak one, not her. She'd never been weak.

And maybe, if none of that had happened, eight years ago - if he decided to believe in all of that fate and destiny bullshit - then maybe they wouldn't be there then, and maybe the last month and a half wouldn't have happened, and that was one thing he never wanted to forget.

So as he rested his forehead against hers, he whispered against her lips, "It's not stupid."

And it really hadn't been stupid, because it made him realise that it wasn't just him wanting her to be with him right then, it was him needing her to stay.

"Please, don't go."

Just hearing Bickslow ask her not to leave was enough for the tears to start rolling down her face again as she wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder.

Even though everything still hurt, Lucy knew it would get better, because they were going to get through it. She'd help Bickslow find a way to forgive himself because she knew he wouldn't on his own. He needed her to help him see that he could, and that, she would be there for. Because she was going be there for him.

"I'm not going anywhere." Lucy mumbled into the fabric of his shirt as his arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her in and holding her tight.

They stayed like that, sitting in silence in the same place they'd met technically eight years earlier. They stayed until the fireworks had long finished and the festival had come to an end as everyone went back to their homes.

And so, after a while, Lucy turned her head on his shoulder to look up at Bickslow, "Now, I don't know about you…" She said quietly with a small smile, "But I've had a pretty stressful day, and I'd really love to just go home."

Bickslow nodded as he pulled her to her feet gently. He couldn't have expected to be able to sit up there all night holding her, it was an unrealistic expectation, but he could take her home. He'd do whatever she wanted.

But when he started looking over his shoulder and turning slightly with his brow furrowed in confusion, Lucy looked up again and asked, "What is it?"

"I… I have no idea where the babies are." Because through everything, he hadn't noticed them disappearing again on their own because it was just one of those times where they did their own thing. "I lost my babies." And he laughed – mostly at himself, but it was enough to get Lucy to smirk and laugh along with him, even if it was over something silly.

But either way, he liked it.

* * *

 **TL;DR -**  
 _ **B: I want to break up with you.**_  
 _ **L: Nah, mate.**_  
 _ **B: Ok.**_

 **Okay, but seriously, this was... messy. I can't even go into the whole 'break up' thing because I'm evil.**

 **CelticHeart13 - I FUA. Oh lord, I laughed so much. Someone make that a longer one-shot *hint hint* ;)**

 **And everyone else who reviewed the last chapters - thank you so much! They were so fun to read!**

 **Also, just gonna put this out here again... next chapter... citrus. If you're not a fan of lemonade (or if you're too young to enjoy it...), then go drink some coke or water or something.**

 **Until next time, my friends!**

 **\- April**


	23. Chapter 23

**Spending a day in bed with a cold makes it easy to work on chapters since I'm not going to get any productive study done when I'm sick.**  
 **That being said, I've also gone over this a million times in the last two days just to make sure it's not awfully written.**

 **As usual, thank you all for the lovely reviews.**

 **And... Time for the badly written citrus. Never have I ever written anything like this, so if it makes you cringe, I apologise. LOL.**

* * *

When Lucy had said she wanted to go home, she didn't mean hers, because that would involve being alone and that was the last thing she wanted.

So as she lay there, curled up against Bickslow as his hand lightly traced up and down her back, over the grey and pink Fairy Tail shirt that was basically hers by that point anyway, she was content. Watching the way his chest rose and fell with each slow breath; feeling how he'd every so often press his face into her hair.

There was no place she'd rather be in that moment, because even though Bickslow had hurt her, he was also the one who was making her feel better.

And Bickslow really had no intentions of ever letting go of the woman in his arms. Not unless she really wanted him to, and she didn't. He knew that. Even though he knew he wasn't good enough for and he probably never would be, with her there with them, he felt like he was, even if it was just a fleeting thought. But that didn't matter, because Lucy wanted him either way. She chose to stay after the day he'd put her through, and he honestly couldn't have been happier about that.

"You're perfect, you know that?" He mumbled into her hair, because really, he didn't think she knew just how perfect she was.

"And you're stupid." She replied lazily.

"Harsh…" _But granted._

She sat up slowly, a smile spreading across her face as she moved to sit over him, her legs on either side of his waist as she leant down, taking his face in her small hands. "But," She whispered, "You just so happen to be a stupid idiot that I care about a lot."

And she brought her lips down to his, trying her to best to convey just how much she cared about him into one single kiss. One slow and drawn out kiss that got so filled with emotion so quickly. As her hands went up, tangling in his hair like it usually did, Bickslow's went to her waist, pinning her against him before he could roll them over, his knee between her legs.

As he hovered over her, one hand on her waist as the other held himself up, he pulled away slightly. "You know I'm probably never going to let you go now, right?" He mumbled against her jaw.

She smiled as kiss after kiss was placed against her jaw and neck. She'd missed that – missed him doing that. "Fine with me." Lucy murmured.

Bickslow sat up suddenly, sitting back on his knees as he looked down at the tangled sheets they were sitting on. "Promise me something." Bickslow whispered, almost sadly.

She sat up slightly to lean on her elbows as she looked up at Bickslow, seeing how his hands were fisted over his knees. "Anything."

"Promise me… that if I ever hurt you; if I ever break your heart again, you'll leave, and you won't look back." Bickslow didn't want to believe that he could ever do that again, but he would. One day. Because he was stupid and he did stupid things. He didn't want to believe that he could ever be stupid enough to leave _her_ again or even consider leaving her again.

And Lucy didn't want to believe he could do it again either but she could see just how painful it was for him to even say it. It meant that in the scenario where it did happen – where she got hurt again, he would rather her leave and forget about him altogether. He'd rather see her move on and deal with the pain himself. He didn't think he'd ever deserve her forgiveness, not again.

That's what Lucy saw in Bickslow then and in a way, she didn't want to make that promise, because she didn't want to believe that she'd ever have to make true on it. But she saw that Bickslow needed it. She knew that he needed her to say the words.

So, quietly, she did. "I promise."

And then, when he felt her hands just above her wrists, he looked up from the sheets. "Promise me that you'll forgive me." Because if anything, that's the one thing he needed. Because if she could forgive him, he could forgive himself. Eventually.

"I promise." She said again. That was one she didn't have to think about, because already, she'd forgiven Bickslow. Mistakes were easy to forgive.

Somehow, Bickslow felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he knew that everything would be fine. Everything would get better and they'd get to a point where nothing hurt and they were fine again.

It didn't take him long to be back over her and pushing her back into the mattress with his lips pressed firmly against hers. He needed to feel her beneath him, because God, had he missed that so much in just a week. But Lucy had the same idea, and that was all that mattered to him in that moment.

Just the feel of their mouths moving together with determination was enough to make him forget everything, because none of it mattered. The feel of her tongue brushing against his with each timid movement and the way her hands always traced up his arms and down his sides. He'd missed it all, and only in a week.

But then Bickslow was back lying on his back with her over his hips and her hands tangling themselves up in his hair. He'd always hated people touching his hair, but not her.

His hand ran up and down her thigh slowly, enjoying the feel of the silky flesh beneath his fingers as his other went to her hip, pushing the fabric of the shirt up and out of the way.

When she rolled her hips against him he couldn't help but moan into her mouth. He'd come to simultaneously hate it and love it whenever she'd done it. She'd always done it just to torture him because she knew exactly what it did to him.

Her fingers trailed down over his bare chest, slowly tracing over every ridge between every muscle, rolling her hips again and eliciting yet another moan from the man. And down her fingers went until she reached the waistband of his boxers again. Lucy knew exactly what she was doing and she knew exactly what she wanted. She wanted Bickslow, plain and simple, and he was right there below her.

As she moved back on his legs and hooked her fingers under the elastic and sat up slowly, Bickslow grabbed her wrists, stopping her from going any further. "We don't-"

He was cut off as Lucy leant down again, kissing him softly and just for a second. "But I want to," She whispered, ignoring the way her heart was pounding in her chest, "Because I want you. In every way."

It was enough for Bickslow to forget how to speak, not that he thought he could at that point anyway. He had no argument for it and he couldn't even try and say that he didn't want her, because God, did he. So instead of words, he could only nod as he let go of her wrists. Suddenly, _he_ was the one who was nervous. When he'd pictured how it would all play out when they finally got to that point (and yes, he'd pictured it. He couldn't help it when she teased him), she was the one who was nervous, not him.

Lucy's hands hooked under the band once more, and when she slowly started pulling the fabric down she had to steady her breathing when she felt like her heart was going to stop just because it was beating so fast. She was nervous, but she wasn't scared.

When his boxers were thrown to the floor by the bed, Bickslow sat up on his elbows, watching as the blonde's hand slowly came up and she palmed down the hardening length before he threw his head back, "Oh, fuck… Lucy…" He groaned. Just one touch and she already had him pining.

She got bolder, wrapping her hand around him with her fingertips only just touching, running up and down his manhood a few times. She had no idea if what she was doing was right but the way he'd moan her name made her think she was doing something right.

And even though Bickslow could have stayed there in a mixture of awe and shock and bliss, he needed more. He caught her hand, pulling it away from himself as he lifted up her shirt, up and over her head before throwing it to the floor, somewhere.

He pulled her down against him, his arousal pressed between them and the friction was enough to drive him insane. His hands brushed up her sides and back, needing to feel over every inch of her, before grazing the sides of her breasts and back down to her waist, flipping them over in an instant.

He had to sit up for a second, just to admire the woman sprawled beneath him in just the bright blue lace panties – something he'd come to learn she had many, _many_ pairs of. But fuck, was it a sight. Her slight blush that was barely visible in the dim light from the single lamp on in the room, and the way her chest rose and fell quickly with each quiet breath.

It was all it had taken for something to switch on inside him. All nervousness he'd thought he had before was gone. _This_ was what he could do; and hell, he knew he was good at it.

Bickslow leant over her again, capturing her mouth instantly and pushing her tongue past her lips as she moaned quietly, arching into the way his hands were cupping and massaging each breast. Never had she ever thought hands could feel so good.

And somehow, it was like Bickslow had heard that thought and his hands went back to her waist, squeezing both sides gently as he trailed kisses down her neck, lingering when she tilted her head back with quiet whimpers. Every touch, however brief it may be, was driving her insane and Bickslow loved that. He loved that he could do that to her.

He was teasing her; drawing it out; anything to make that moment last as long as possible. Bickslow wanted to cherish it, almost. It wasn't just some random woman he'd met at a bar and wasn't going to see ever again – it was Lucy, and God, he never wanted to _not_ see her again. He was taking his time, something he never did.

His hands trailed downwards, over the lace on each side of her hips and down her thighs and up again, over and over.

"Oh, fuck." Lucy moaned as his tongue flicked over a nipple, pulling it into his mouth, a hand roughly fondling her other as he held onto her leg, keeping it bent as he leaned over her.

And then he moved himself up, drowning out the whimper she made from the loss of contact with his mouth as his hands pressed into the mattress, holding himself up. "Not too late to stop." Bickslow murmured, watching her face for any flicker of doubt. But it never came and as she shook her head, his lips captured hers again as his hands began roaming lower and lower, ghosting over her stomach before running over the thin fabric of her panties.

Pulling his mouth away from hers, almost reluctantly (but he really had other places it needed to be), he shuffled down the bed as his hands found her hips. Slowly, painstakingly slowly, he began to trail kisses down her torso, the valley between her breasts and down her stomach. Each one made Lucy feel like her stomach was doing somersaults.

Bickslow had to fight the urge to just rip the thin blue fabric from her body as he hooked his fingers under the sides, rolling them down and over her hips slowly, never once stopping the kisses.

Lucy sat up on her elbows, and as she raised her hips just enough for Bickslow to finally pull her underwear down over them, she caught the slight smirk as he raised his eyes. Her heart stopped – just for a second – because there, in Bickslow, she saw a glimmer of his usual self. And after their day, she'd needed to see that. She'd needed to know that it was possible for Bickslow to get back to that because seeing him depressed and hating himself hurt her more than him breaking her heart. She needed to know that he'd be able to forgive himself, and just from a small smirk, she knew then that it was possible. And even though it was only a small part of her telling her so, she knew she was going to be part of the reason as to why he could.

As the small piece of lace finally slipped down over her ankles, Lucy became aware of just how exposed she was. But she wasn't embarrassed, because the way Bickslow had looked at her made her realise just how much _he_ wanted _her_. There was no doubt, no voice screaming in her head to stop, nothing. Just desire.

She arched her back as his fingers ran up her folds, moaning as he pulled his mouth away from her neck, because her neck was not where he wanted his mouth to stay. So he slid down the bed, nestling his shoulders between her legs as he kissed down over her stomach again, and lower. Lower until it was his tongue running over her folds rather than her fingers as she overwhelmed his every sense.

 _Fuck…_ was all that came to Bickslow in that moment as he closed his eyes, hooking his arms around her legs and pulling her closer. _More._ Honestly, if it wasn't the actual fucking part Bickslow loved so much, it was _that_. The way women would scream his name as he sent them over the edge, usually just with his tongue alone, he loved it. He knew it was weird that he got such a rise from it, but none of that really mattered anymore.

So when he finally pulled the sensitive bundle of nerves into his mouth and she moaned his name, cursing under her breath something about his tongue, he chuckled, only eliciting another moan from the blonde from the vibrations that ran through her.

If she'd thought his hands her good, his tongue was even better. In a league of its own, she realised.

Slowly, he eased a finger into her core, reaching places his tongue couldn't. Her breath started to come in short, shallow gasps and he knew she was nearing her end. A second finger as his mouth focused on the bud, working in time with each thrust of his hand.

Lucy wasn't even aware of what she was saying anymore – either incoherent words or curses or his name, or a mix of them all at once. She couldn't even hear anything over the sound of her own heart in her ears and the sound of her breathing. Her hands fisted into the sheets as another moan escaped her throat. _So close_ , she thought.

She didn't think she'd ever felt so good in her entire life. She was just stuck in a state of euphoric bliss and even though she didn't want that feeling to end, she wanted to reach her end, and oh, did she know just how close it was.

And as his fingers curled inside of her, finding something she hadn't known was there, her end came running up at her. "Oh, fuck… Bickslow…" Was all that came out – half scream, half moan – as he drew out her climax, replacing his fingers with his tongue yet again as she shuddered, warranting another low moan from Lucy as she tried to catch her breath.

"Jesus Christ, you're loud." Bickslow muttered as he crawled back up, brushing his lips across her jaw before up to her mouth. He honestly felt a little sorry for his neighbours – they'd been able to sleep in peace for a month and a half, only to most likely be woken up at 2AM by the blonde. Not that he was complaining.

"Shut up…" She replied breathlessly, blushing when she realised just what she was tasting on his tongue. "Not my fault."

"I'll definitely take full responsibility for that." Bickslow chuckled as his hands found her hips, rolling them over again, a light moan escaping as her sex rubbed against him before pulling her down, her chest flush against him. "We really don't have to go any further if you don't want to." He said quietly.

A small smile made its place on her mouth before she leaned down, kissing him lightly as a hand slid down between them, brushing over his member as she sat up to roll her hips, enjoying the sounds that she could make _him_ make – just from a roll of her hips. "No, we don't have to… but I want to, and _you_ want to…"

Bickslow didn't think Lucy understood just how much he wanted to – wanted _her_. And God, just her rolling her hips lightly against him was driving him insane, and once again, she knew exactly what it did. If it was anyone else, Bickslow would have already had her on her back and be in the middle of fucking her senseless, because that's just what Bickslow did, and hell, he never got any complaints.

But not with Lucy. He wanted to take his time with her because it _was_ her and not anyone else. He wanted her to remember it; hell, he wanted to remember it, too, and that was something he never wanted to happen.

He sat up on an elbow, one hand still rubbing smooth circles over her thigh as she raised herself up to line him up at her entrance.

She took calming breaths as she braced herself for the pain she'd heard so much about as she slowly lowered herself down, gasping slightly each time she paused. But there was no sharp, shooting pain like she'd expected. When she finally reached his hips again, Bickslow threw his head back and fell back to the pillow. "Fuck…" He rasped. _So tight._

Lucy leant forward slightly, her knees on either side of his hips as her hands rested over his stomach, feeling it rise and fall slightly with each breath he took. Everything was so new to her – the fading uncomfortable stretching feeling, the sensation of being so completely full, not to mention the feeling of being so close to someone, in almost every way.

Everything leading up to that moment had been in small steps, but finally reaching that pinnacle wasn't a small step – it was more of a giant leap forward; one that they needed to happen. Because to Lucy, her innocence was something she wanted to hold on to until she knew it wasn't just a game, something that was fun until someone got bored and decided they wanted to move on.

 _Bickslow doesn't date._ She was always reminded of that – _always._ And yet, he'd dated her. Lucy realised that it was never a game to Bickslow. She was never something to just kill the time. Somehow, she knew that Bickslow had always been serious about her. Serious enough to do things he never did – all for her, because he wanted her and to be _with_ her.

When she finally got accustomed to every new feeling and sensation, she slowly raised herself up, only wincing slightly at how empty she suddenly felt before sinking back down just as slowly, gasping quietly. Over and over she did the same thing, each time feeling better than the last.

Bickslow's brain had more or less shut off by that point and all he could do was moan at each movement she made. With that came a limited vocabulary, each word escaping in the form of a groan or moan or something indecipherable. Oh, Fuck, God, So, Tight, Good, Lucy, and Cosplayer were the only words that floated around his brain but he didn't even care because honestly, her wrapped around him so tightly was making it impossible to think or even care about anything other than, well… that.

He had to fight the urge to grab her hips and slam her down over and over, so instead he just rested his hands on her, for once enjoying something slow, because God, did it feel just as good, if not better.

When her pace faltered and quiet gasps turned into soft moans and hums and her breaths became shorter, she realised just how hard it was to keep a steady pace. Bickslow realised this and rolled them over again, never completely leaving her before he buried himself in her core again.

Over and over he snapped his hips, never too hard and never too fast as he held on to just a little bit of his control. Her moans got louder and louder, only silencing them when he leant down, crashing his lips to hers as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, keeping him there.

Even though the uncomfortable feeling never quite left her, Lucy couldn't deny that what she was feeling was unmistakably amazing. With each passing second, she could feel that tension growing low in her belly. "Oh… God… Please…" She rasped as she threw her head back as a sudden wave of pleasure ripped throughout her at the way Bickslow had angled his own hips. She was so close, and Bickslow knew that.

He dropped his head to her shoulder, holding himself up with one elbow as his hand smoothed down her side, stopping at her hip. The way her walls clenched around him was driving him insane and was sending him towards his own end. But he needed to feel her come apart around him first.

The hand on her hip moved lower to between them, seeking out the bundle of nerves at her apex as his thumb brushed over it.

"Fuck, Bicks." She cried out. His mouth latched onto her neck to suppress his own groan as she tightened around him even more, then, one thrust was all it took as he pushed himself back up, one hand on her hip as he continued rubbing circles over her clit, she cried out again, her head going back as she dissolved into the overwhelming feeling of absolute ecstasy that ran throughout her, forgetting everything.

Her moaning his name as she fell apart, her core clamping down on him was enough to send Bickslow over the edge as he fell forward onto his elbows, burying himself in her completely with one rough thrust. "Oh fuck… Lucy…" He rasped, feeling her chest rise to meet his with each breath as he stayed firmly implanted within her, her sex continuing to draw more out of him with each flutter.

The only sound in the room was the sound of their ragged breaths – Bickslow trying to recover from the almost earth-shattering orgasm and Lucy still coming down from her own. She winced slightly when he withdrew himself and collapsed onto the bed next to her, still panting.

He still wasn't able to put his thoughts into a logical order, but the only thing he could think of was how surprisingly amazing it had been. Bickslow had had bad sex, good sex, great sex, and anything and everything else between. But never amazing. Not enough to make him almost want to collapse, anyway. And he didn't know what it was. Maybe it was because it was her and he'd wanted it for so long, or maybe it was because they'd waited and it meant so much more now. It was something, but he couldn't even begin to comprehend it.

From all of the stories she'd heard from Cana and now Levy, Lucy was vaguely aware of how her first time wasn't supposed to be what she considered amazing; hell, it was supposed to be bad, but they'd also got the 'pain' thing wrong too. Maybe it was because she had nothing to compare it to that she thought it was so good? Who knows. She didn't really care, to be honest because she knew there was no point in questioning something that felt so good.

She rolled to her side, leaning her head on Bickslow's chest as his arm went around her, smoothing small circles over her back as he pulled the sheet up.

"You okay?" He asked quietly, still catching his breath.

"Mmhmm." She hummed, her hand resting over the chest, ignoring the thin layer of sweat they were both covered in. _Capricorn is always trying to get me to exercise more_ , she thought with a slight smirk. But she was okay – in every way. The slightly dull pain that she hadn't noticed before was fine, she could live with that. She was okay because she was happy, and she realised that's what mattered. No doubt, no regret, just happiness.

And as long as Lucy was happy, Bickslow was happy.

* * *

It took a few days for Bickslow to leave his apartment and return to the guild. That first night they'd had together was only enough for him to forget everything for just that – the night. When morning came around and he awoke with Lucy curled up against him again, he was happy – like he always was when she was around – but he was back to hating himself, for the most part.

He was never going to be able to forget things he did that hurt her, he knew that. But it wasn't a case of forgetting them, as Lucy had told him one afternoon when she sat curled up on his lounge with the book on Seith magic, it was just about being able to move past it.

He had to learn from his mistakes and that's what everything he'd done to her in the past had been. Between the Battle of Fairy Tail and Fantasia chaos and then his being an absolute idiot and thinking leaving her was a good idea – they were all mistakes.

But he still had to forgive himself, and that was something Bickslow knew was going to take a while because he still knew he didn't deserve Lucy, yet she'd stayed. She stayed the entire three days he didn't want to leave his apartment, and then, it was the on the fourth day that she all but dragged him out the door, claiming he needed to go and see his team before _her_ team started looking for her. Because without a doubt, Natsu would seek Bickslow out first.

And maybe she was right. Maybe Bickslow did need to go and see his team – needed to try and get back into his usual routine instead of lounging around in bed like he pretty much had been doing for a week and a half.

So he made his way over to where Laxus was sitting with Gajeel and Levy – or maybe it was the other way around by the way Laxus was glaring at Levy even though she was too busy with her nose in a book – ducking under the table that came flying towards his head, presumably from Natsu and Gray fighting again.

"Oh, look who decided to show up today." Gajeel muttered, his chin resting on a pile of books.

Laxus looked to Bickslow who sat down beside him from the corner of his eyes. "Please tell me you didn't do something stupid."

"Today or in general?" He replied, the corner of his mouth upturned in a small smirk.

"You know what I mean." Laxus said, lowering his voice as he narrowed his eyes at the man.

And the smirk faltered, if only for a second, before he lifted up his mug, "Ah, yeah…" He mumbled, then, "Almost?"

"'Almost?' What did you even do?" Gajeel asked, suddenly taking an interest.

"Rather not talk about it…"

* * *

When Lucy walked through the guild doors a little while later with a smile on her face, finally being able to see her friends, she had to decide which area of the hall to visit first. She could go to the bar to talk to Mira and Lisanna, but that would involve more of the Strauss' never-ending questions about who it was she was dating and she really didn't want to deal with that since she still had a few fading hickeys on her neck and shoulder that no matter what she tried, were not going away. She just had to be grateful her hair could hide them.

So then she wondered if she should go and see Levy – after all, the woman would want to know about the events that transpired over the last few days (not all of them, of course…). But… she couldn't really do that either since for whatever reason, she was sitting with Laxus and Bickslow, and even though Levy being at that table would give her a reason to go over there, she didn't want to risk it.

So the blonde decided to just go and sit down with her team who seemed to be in the middle of a heated argument.

"I'm telling you, we need to be out there looking for her!" Erza yelled, slamming her fist down on the table.

"No we don't!" Natsu screamed back.

"Uh… guys? What are you yelling about?" Lucy asked as she nervously sat down next to Gray who was shaking his head along with Wendy.

Erza gasped as when she saw Lucy, "Lucy! Thank heavens you're okay!" She said, instantly appearing at the blonde's side and pulling her in to a bone-crushing hug that gave her an instant headache.

"Erza… please…" She choked out, feeling like she was about to burst from the pressure the woman was exerting around her middle.

"I told you she was fine!" Natsu said as he slumped back down on the bench, picking at the plate of food in front of him.

When Erza finally let go of Lucy, the blonde turned to Gray as she rubbed the side of her head where she was certain a lump was already forming from where it hit Erza's armour. "What are they talking about…?"

Gray shrugged as he leant back with one arm over the back of the bench, "Erza got worried when you didn't show up and you weren't in your apartment and she couldn't find you. Figured you just taken a solo job or something."

 _Oh crap_ … Lucy thought. She hadn't really considered anyone coming to look for her in her apartment, but then again it made sense that they would since after all, she was in the guild almost every single day she wasn't out on a job (that, and to her team, her apartment was like their second own second home). She herself had only stopped by once over the three days she stayed at Bickslow's and it was only to get her Seith magic book and clothes instead of having to get Virgo to do it.

"Ah, yeah. Sorry I forgot to tell anyone. It was kind of a spur of the moment thing." She said, laughing awkwardly.

"All is well," Erza replied, "Anyway, I've lined up an S-Class mission for us. It's part of the reason I wanted to find you."

Lucy perked up at the talk of an S-Class mission. After all, they always had the highest pay and their shares were still pretty large, even after the damages got deducted. "When do we leave?" She asked.

Erza smiled, "First train out tomorrow. The weather in Protea Valley around this time of year is a little chilly so pack some warmer clothes. I expect it will take us about three weeks to complete." The Requip mage stood from the table as she looked over her team (because let's face it – it was 'Team Natsu' but it was really Erza's team), "Now if you'll excuse me, I have some things to wrap up before the end of the day, so I'll meet you all at the station tomorrow."

Wendy slid the job flyer across the table as Erza headed for the doors and Lucy skimmed over it, her eyes going wide when she saw just how much the reward was. _Hopefully it won't be too difficult_ , she thought. Because if the reward was that high, then it was going to at least a little troublesome.

* * *

"Princess, wake up."

Lucy groaned at the soft voice coming from next to her. She was a morning person, but after spending the night at Bickslow's again, she had to get up earlier just so she'd have time to go by her own apartment before she went to the station.

"Go away, Loke." She mumbled into the pillow, pulling the sheets up over her more because there was no way she was letting the playboy see her naked. Bickslow, yes; but not Loke. Ever. Not intentionally, anyway.

Bickslow opened an eye, squinting slightly at how bright the room was. _I swear those curtains were shut…_

He instinctively pulled Lucy closer by the arm he had wrapped around her waist, nestling his face in her hair before he remembered just what it was that had made him open his eye in the first place, and at that, they both shot open and he sat up slightly. Strangely enough, the pesky lion spirit was not what he'd expected nor wanted to see, especially first thing in the morning and definitely not when Lucy was wearing nothing under the sheets.

With a groan, he lifted his arm just to roll over to his other side. It was too early to deal with that. _Her spirit, her problem_ , he thought.

"Okay, I'm awake…" She muttered as she sat up from the bed slowly, rubbing her eyes with one hand as the other held the sheet up over her breasts. Lucy glared at Loke when she realised he had no intentions of moving. "Loke, as usual, thank you for being my alarm clock when I need it, but don't make me force your gate closed."

"Are you sure there's nothing I can assist you with this morning, Lucy?" Loke replied, then, as he turned his head slightly to narrow his eyes at the Seith mage's back, "Or has Bickslow got that covered?" He said a little lower.

"Watch it, lion cub." Bickslow mumbled into the pillow. It was way too early for him to even pretend to be civil with Loke.

With a sigh, the spirit pushed the glasses up his nose before turning back to Lucy. "I'm always here i-"

" _Loke._ " Lucy warned.

"Okay, fine…"

Lucy fell back to the bed with her own sigh as her beloved lion spirit returned to his own world, only after muttering something about how he deserved Lucy's love. When Bickslow rolled back over, his arm going around her waist again to pull her side to him, she turned her head on the pillow to look at Bickslow who was pushing his face into his own pillow as much as possible. "Are you two ever going to get along?"

"Not when we're both after the same girl," Bickslow murmured, "He should know by know that I always win against him though."

She pushed Bickslow's arm off of her as she sat up, moving to the edge of the bed and taking the sheet with her (only after Bickslow gave up his hold on it and instead pulled the blanket up). Before she could close the bathroom door behind her, she stopped and looked over her shoulder and back at the bed, "Who says you've won?" She asked with a slight smirk as she finally pulled the door closed after dragging the sheet with her.

 _Me_ , Bickslow thought. _I say I've won._

By the time Lucy was done getting ready enough to head back to her own apartment so she could finish there, Bickslow was on the verge of falling back asleep. He was so far from being a morning person it wasn't even funny anymore. Yet every morning she was still there, without fail, she'd gotten him awake before 11AM. He was never going to get used to it.

"Alright, I really have to leave now." Lucy said as she walked to the other side of the bed, leaning down to press a kiss to his cheek.

"But do you really have to leave?" He mumbled as he pushed himself to a sitting position, rubbing his eyes with one hand as he once again got used to the light in the room.

She smiled, "Yes, I do. It's only three weeks though. I'm sure you'll be fine." Because over the last few days, she noticed that each day he really did get a bit happier. She had to believe he'd be okay with his team for three weeks.

"That I will be." He replied with his own smile, even though he didn't mean it. In reality, Bickslow didn't want her to go, but as members of wizard guilds, that's just what they did; it was how they made their living. He couldn't just expect her to give up on jobs just because he wanted her all to his self. He'd _never_ expect that of her, just like he wouldn't expect her to do the same with him.

But it wasn't just that he wanted to be selfish. The only reason he'd been able to even smile over the last few days was because she was there with him. It was almost too easy to forget everything, even though that was the entire problem in the first place – he had forgotten everything. But it was different with her now, because he knew he couldn't entirely forget about it, and he knew he never would. He was still nowhere near being able to forgive himself, but it was almost as if Lucy being able to forgive him was enough.

"In that case, I'm off." Lucy said as Bickslow pulled her down as he fell back to the bed, his arms around her waist as her lips pressed against his.

When she almost hesitantly pulled away from the kiss and stood, Bickslow sat back up slowly. "Don't get yourself hurt."

"Don't do anything stupid." She called over her shoulder before she disappeared into the hall.

So when he heard his front door close, Bickslow fell back down to his pillow with a sigh, pulling the blanket over his head since he was too lazy to get up and close the curtains.

 _It's going to be a long three weeks._

* * *

 **Is it time to come out of the hole I was hiding in again? Part of the reason I read over it so many times was just to make sure half of it didn't make ME cringe.**

 **But seriously though, if it's absolutely fucking awful, please send me a message or leave a review so I can know what I need to work on (a.k.a everything).**

 **Now I should probably go and do some study and research... Evidence Based Practice... *shudders***

 **\- April**


	24. Chapter 24

**Holy shit, you guys. Thank you all so much for the reviews on the last chapter. Definitely making me feel better about my writing.**

 **In regards to the Levy and Gajeel table situation, you'll need to remember that in my story, Gajeel is quite often sitting with Laxus and/or Bickslow if he's not sitting with Levy. So, basically, since I couldn't really explain it in here (I might have forgotten to put it in and I think it's easier this way), I just like to think that Gajeel was sitting with Laxus and Co. one day and Levy got bored, decided to join them (which was where Laxus was glaring at her in the last chapter), and it just kind of stuck. Gajeel is basically the adopted member of the Raijinshuu, lol. I hope that clears it up though!**

 **And yes, I changed the description, again. One day, I'm going to come up with one that I like enough to stick with it. For the time being, that one is going to be there for the foreseeable future (and that's going to be for a long time because I have plans for this to go on for a longgggggg time. Partly because I'll probably melt down when I write the final chapter and I don't want that to happen, but don't worry, we're no where near that!)**

* * *

Lucy all but collapsed when they all piled into the small train compartment just before it departed for Magnolia. She didn't even have the energy to tell Natsu to stop leaning on her as she rested her head against the window. The last three weeks had honestly been exhausting and for the first time, Erza had been spot on with how long a job would last. It was literally three weeks to the day.

But, it was still a four-hour train ride. However, that also meant she was only a four-hour train ride from Bickslow and she missed him a lot. She could only wonder what he'd been up to in the last three weeks, because hers had been, well… a little complicated and frustrating.

Firstly, when Erza had said Protea Valley was a little chilly, it was an understatement; it was absolutely freezing. She couldn't get enough layers on (partly because she hadn't packed them), while Gray walked around stark naked half the time. Not that that was any different from what he usually did. Natsu, on the other hand, whenever he tried to set himself on fire to warm himself up, the icy wind that never seemed to stop kept making it impossible for him to do so.

If the weather wasn't an issue, it was that the job description on the flyer had been way off. It wasn't just one dark guild – it was seven. Seven dark guilds had decided to form an alliance in an attempt to take over the small township of Protea Valley once and for all. Somehow, they'd all managed to come out alive (scathed, but alive – mostly thanks to Wendy) even though they were up against several hundred mages. Taking out each of the dark guilds had been time consuming and it required a thorough plan in order to do so without causing too much destruction for once and making their job even harder, but… this was Team Natsu; they didn't know the meaning of 'thorough plan' and it was precisely why they'd spent the last three days cooped up in the inn they'd been staying at in town to try and recuperate, since a certain pink-haired idiot decided to cause trouble one afternoon and led all seven of the dark guilds' members back to where they were staying.

Even though their own team was strong, five (plus two cats) versus several hundred was an incredibly tough fight, especially when more than half of said several hundred had already been beaten by either Erza, Gray, or Natsu (or even Lucy herself) in the prior weeks when they'd tried the planned approach, and they all had a bone to pick with the fairies.

And if either of those two things weren't reasons enough to frustrate Lucy, it was that she had been so close to telling Erza about her relationship with Bickslow so many times. Every time she'd find the courage to bring it up because it seemed like the perfect opportunity – the boys weren't around and Wendy was in another room or something – she'd instantly chicken out.

It was late one night when Wendy was in the shower and Lucy walked back into their shared room, ready to just come out with the news because it was no secret that Erza was the biggest issue they had – not the guild, just Erza.

But… when she walked in, the Requip mage just had to be sharpening her swords, of all things she could be doing. The swords that she'd most likely be running through Bickslow when they got back, Lucy realised. That thought alone was enough to send her running out of the room.

If it wasn't Erza being unintentionally terrifying, it was that something would always interrupt them and she'd never get a chance to do it.

So she'd left it for the remainder of their job. There was no point in trying, and after all, she'd never actually spoken to Bickslow about it and maybe he wasn't ready to die just yet.

But either way, she could bring that up at a later time. All she wanted at that point was to be back home in Magnolia and out of the freezing town she'd spent the last three weeks in.

* * *

Her ability to always be able to sleep on trains came in handy for the journey home, because by the time they'd reached Magnolia, Lucy wasn't as completely exhausted as she had been so she didn't need to go back to her own home and nap before going back to the guild. Instead, she could just quickly stop by and change into some cooler clothes.

So when she walked into the guild a little while later, she didn't automatically go and sit with the members of her team that had already made their way to the guild, nor did she go over to the bar; she went straight over to where Levy sat with Gajeel.

"Oh, thank God she's back." Evergreen complained as Lucy took the seat opposite her and next to Levy.

"I second that." Gajeel muttered.

"Uh… hello to you too," Lucy said as she chuckled slightly, "I'd love to know why you're so glad I'm back."

"Bickslow has been miserable." Freed deadpanned.

Evergreen nodded along with Freed as she looked to the blonde, "Miserable enough to make this guy even more depressing than usual." She said with a small smirk.

"Be quiet, Evergreen." He muttered, resting his chin in his palm.

"So… where is he?" Lucy asked quietly.

With that, Freed and Evergreen both turned to look at each other before they both looked to Gajeel who just shrugged. "Uh… we have no idea, actually. We haven't seen him last Friday…" Evergreen muttered as she looked down at the table.

Lucy sat back in her chair as she tried to think of all the places Bickslow could be, but she realised she didn't know what those places were. In the time they'd been dating, Bickslow had never really strayed too far from the usual – his house or the guild. But his team knew him better than she did and Lucy wasn't afraid to admit that, but if they didn't know where he was, then how was she supposed to know? They must have at least checked, otherwise it would have been 'he's probably in his apartment' rather than 'we have no idea'.

Her mind went over every possible place he could be – his apartment, Cade's bar, any other bar, the top of the toy shop; hell, even the library. She didn't think he'd be in any of them and even so, no one had seen him for a few days so she found herself wondering if something had happened to him while she was gone.

But she was brought back from her thoughts as Laxus sighed loudly. "He's in Hargeon."

"What? Why?" Evergreen asked.

"Huh," Freed muttered, staring at a blank space on a wall behind Lucy, "He's at the old training building, isn't he?"

Laxus nodded slowly as he turned to look at Evergreen beside him, "What?" He asked.

She came out of her slight daze to glare at Laxus, "How did you even know that?"

Another shrug from the man, "He might have mentioned it the other day… didn't see the point of bringing it up." Laxus mumbled, folding his arms across his chest.

"Uh… so where exactly is this building?" Lucy asked as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat, watching as Freed pulled out a pencil and a small piece of paper from his breast pocket, writing down an address before passing it to her. Nodding, she stood up, "Thanks guys." She said with a slight smile, waving to Levy as he mumbled something, not looking up from her book.

As she looked down at the address written on the piece of paper once more before folding it up and placing it in her small bag, she pushed the doors open to the guild to head back to the train station so soon after leaving there.

But it didn't matter, because honestly, she just wanted to see Bickslow.

* * *

The old training building in Hargeon was actually an old warehouse that Laxus and the Raijinshuu had purchased not too long after after officially becoming a team and converted into a space that they could all use for, well… training. The best part was that it was right next to the marina, and with the loft that had been turned into a living space, you could literally just lay in bed after training all day to watch the sunset, and honestly, it was a pretty nice view.

A lot of the actual downstairs space was Bickslow's. Freed's took up only a small portion, much like Evergreen's, while Laxus had a decent sized portion dedicated to his own equipment – most of them being weights of varying sizes, but he'd only really used any of it a few times.

All of that being said, Bickslow also had the largest pieces of equipment between the trapeze set up down one end and the tumbling floor that ran down one side. Honestly, he didn't have half of the stuff he did for actual training, it was more for fun than anything.

But for the last few days, Bickslow hadn't been there for fun; he'd been there because he needed something to take his mind off of how much he missed Lucy. Three weeks was relatively nothing when his own team quite often went on missions for months at a time, so Bickslow found himself worrying about how he'd cope when they started going on the longer jobs. He didn't even know if he'd still be dating Lucy by the time that came around again, but he could still worry about it.

On that particular day, he'd spent most of his time on the tumbling floor. He hadn't been on it since everyone went their separate ways as they trained for the Grand Magic Games, and he was honestly a little sore from the amount of, well… tumbles he'd had.

When he'd had enough of hurting himself for another day, he went back to the trapeze, like he had every other day. He hung from the bar by his knees, his eyes closed as his arms dangled down by his head as he focused on his breathing. He'd always loved the feeling of hanging upside down, no matter how strange it was (but Bickslow was a strange person). Somehow, he'd always be able to see things clearer when the world was upside down.

When Lucy finally found the building with the address that was written on the small piece of paper, she stared at the building for a few moments. It was an old brick warehouse right on the marina and honestly, it looked like no one had visited the place in a while. But she checked the address twice, looking down at the paper and back up to the small sign that hung above the door. With a sigh, she shoved the paper into her bag once again and pushed open the heavy door.

She walked into a small reception area – only a small desk with a bookcase on one side and a leather lounge on the other. Nothing special. So she moved forward and through another heavy door.

Honestly, Lucy didn't know what she'd expected to find given it was an old warehouse, but she hadn't expected to see countless mats of all colours and sizes, weights, various dummies with targets on them or the many pieces of gym equipment she honestly couldn't put names to, because she didn't actually spend any time in the guild gym herself. Least of all, she didn't expect to see a trapeze down one end with an upside-down Bickslow.

She moved forward through the large room, stepping over the skewed mats that lay around the place and towards Bickslow who still had no idea she was there.

"What are you doing?" She called from where she stood, continuing to navigate the floor.

Bickslow's eyes shot open as he fell from the trapeze, landing in the net before he scrambled to the edge to jump down from it. He honestly didn't think he'd moved so fast in his entire life as he hopped over a few things that were scattered around the place – the things that were in his way, really.

Lucy laughed as she watched him navigate the obstacle course of the gym, and soon she was picked up off the ground with his arms around her waist as he buried his face in the crook of her neck. "Hey." She said through laughter as her arms laced around his neck.

"Holy fuck, I missed you." He murmured. It had only taken hearing her voice to realise just how much he'd missed her, and truthfully, it was more than he'd originally thought.

"Is that why you were miserable?"

Bickslow pulled his head back to look at the small smile on her face, "Who said I was miserable?"

Her smile grew brighter and wider and Bickslow couldn't help but return his own – it was contagious, it really was. "Gajeel… Evergreen… Freed…"

"Okay, I wasn't _that_ miserable." _Maybe just a little…_

"Sure you weren't," Lucy scoffed before she lowered her head to press her lips to his. _Three weeks_ , she thought. _The absolute longest three weeks._ Because even though she'd been incredibly busy and her mind was otherwise occupied, there still wasn't a day where she didn't think about how she'd rather be back in Magnolia with Bickslow. And somewhere, she knew she shouldn't be at the point where she'd rather spend every second of her day with Bickslow, but each time she saw him she could forget about it.

Being with Bickslow made her happy, and was it really so bad that she wanted to be happy all the time?

When they pulled apart and she rest her forehead on his, another smile on her lips, she said quietly, "But you're not miserable now, I hope."

"Not even close." Because being able to hold her again after what felt like the longest three weeks of his life made him forget everything again. Lucy was the only thing that mattered.

* * *

Lucy absentmindedly ran her fingers over his collarbone on the shoulder she was leaning on. Bickslow honestly didn't know whether to be creeped out by it or not but in a way, it was a little soothing so he left it. Plus, he had to fight the urge to squirm since apparently it was a sensitive spot, but he wasn't going to tell her that.

She adjusted herself on the bed to look out the windows that took up the entire height of the wall – from down at the ground floor to the tops of the ceiling, the orange and pink hues lighting up everything on the floor of the gym and casting shadows across the ground.

"I'm surprised you guys aren't fighting to spend all of your time here. The view over the water is beautiful." She murmured as she stared out past the railing for the loft and through the large windows.

"Yeah, but… I can think of more beautiful things to look at." Bickslow said quietly before kissing her temple.

Lucy let out a short laugh, "God, you're a dork."

Bickslow grinned, "Oh? You thought I meant you? I meant myself in the mirror." He couldn't hold back the laughter when the blonde shoved a pillow in his face. "Well… I guess you're not too bad. If I squint, I can totally see it."

"Oh, shut up."

So as she laid there with Bickslow, they talked about everything and anything – her job, how she came to have a bandage around her elbow and how stupid the reason was, how she almost told Erza, the fact that no one on Bickslow's team had visited the building for months, and where exactly they were going to go for dinner, when they decided to get out of bed. That wasn't even the complete list; not even half of it.

It didn't matter to Lucy what they talked about because all she could focus on was how much Bickslow had changed in the last three weeks. When she'd left for her job, he was still finding it hard to smile. And now, he was there laughing and grinning like he usually did and although he was honestly annoying the living hell out of her with the way they couldn't come to an agreement on a place to eat and how he kept tickling her when things calmed down, just to get her to laugh again, she couldn't help but wonder just what had happened over the last three weeks for him to go back to his usual self – if not a happier version of himself, because Lucy didn't think she'd ever seen him so cheerful.

Even though Bickslow thought that Lucy being gone for three weeks would make him fall into the hole of self-loathing she'd been helping him climb out of three weeks prior, it really hadn't. Even though he missed her more than he could put into words, her being gone was a blessing in its own way. With her there, he could forget about everything, but when she wasn't there, Bickslow was forced to face all of his problems head on.

He had to completely accept that what he'd done was in the past and there was nothing he could do about it anymore. He still hadn't forgiven himself, and he was beginning to think he never would, but he could accept it. Because each day it hurt less and less to think about, and that was because he remembered that she was still there with him, through everything he'd done.

And honestly, Freed had been a big help too. That was the reason they were a team. Not because of Laxus (not entirely, anyway), but because they were all able to help each other when things got tough. To them, that was their family. Not so much the guild as it was each other. Freed had helped him realise that for Lucy, he needed to accept things and move past them. Because even though to that day, Levy and Gajeel had been the only people to actually see them together (apart from that time Freed caught them in the library), it wasn't hard to figure out that his hating himself and sinking further and further into the hole of self-loathing again was hurting Lucy just as much as it was everyone around him.

What was she going to think when she'd come back only to find Bickslow withdrawn and depressed again?

That was all it had taken for Bickslow to 'snap out of it', so to speak. Without realising it, he had been hurting her again, just by hurting _himself_. He wasn't going to let that happen anymore.

Day in and day out, he went to the guild because he knew that's where it would be easiest to be. Because if he was alone, he'd just end up falling into that hole again and he didn't want that. It was hard at first, but his team was there. Freed and Evergreen would occasionally have to remind him that he couldn't let the fact she was out on a job get to him too much. Levy would often whisper something in Gajeel's ear that made both himself and Laxus choke on whatever it was they were eating or drinking, and honestly, Bickslow was a little worried about what it was the small woman could possibly have said to get that kind of reaction from both Dragon Slayers. They both refused to tell him when he'd asked about at a later time.

With each day, with the little things that the people at his table would say (that permanently included Levy and Gajeel by that point – something which had been a little strange at first, but with each week it became expected to see the Script mage in a staring contest with Laxus) and the way they were almost going out of their way to make him laugh or do something stupid, it got better. Things got better and he was slowly accepting everything – still not forgiving though.

Bickslow being miserable wasn't actually him falling into the hole of self-loathing again; it was him just missing Lucy and even though he was getting back to his usual self with each day, he just missed her more and more. He missed the way that occasionally her laugh could be heard over the ruckus in the guild and how she'd occasionally have to step in to tear Natsu and Gray apart when Erza wasn't there. Hell, he missed the way her team in general would somehow always be the centre of every brawl, and that was something Bickslow didn't think he'd ever be thinking about.

He knew his team was getting sick of how miserable he was and it wasn't just his team who had noticed. He was leaning with his chin on his arms one day when Mira came over with refills for the table and she looked down at Bickslow as she tucked the tray under her arm and asked, "Are you okay, Bickslow?"

Before he could even respond, Gajeel had done so for him, making him mutter a curse under his breath that he knew the Dragon Slayer could hear. "He's not getting laid." Gajeel had said, causing Levy to snicker as she hid her face in a book. Hell, even Laxus had smirked.

The fact that he wasn't getting laid was irrelevant. Sort of. Although he was a little concerned about how Gajeel knew that fact – maybe it was a guess? Who knows. He could only be a little grateful that Mira had listened to Evergreen when the woman decided to join the conversation, putting it down to his 'losing his game'.

But by the Thursday before she came back, he'd reached a whole new level of miserable. He needed to get out of there and go find something to occupy his time with, and that was how he ended up spending the last few days in the old training building in Hargeon. He wasn't even worried about being alone by that point because he knew he was okay; enough, anyway.

* * *

For whatever reason, Bickslow couldn't sleep in the next morning and after a while of staring out at the calm sea through the windows, he decided he needed to get up. So carefully, he pushed the blankets and sheets back just enough to slide out of the bed without disturbing Lucy, and for once, he was thankful that he wasn't being used as a human pillow.

He silently went around the bedroom area of the loft, finding a pair of shorts on the floor as he pulled them on before grabbing an apple from the small kitchenette.

It wasn't long before he was back on the floor, stretching his arms and legs as he stared down the spring-loaded floor. That's how he'd started every morning he'd been in Hargeon, and honestly, Bickslow was beginning to wonder why he hadn't been back to the gym in so long.

With one final deep breath, he began his sprint for the mat, and then, when it was close enough, he started with the basic cartwheel just to get him going backwards and then he was half way down the mat, each time he kicked off from it with a flip, whip, or roundoff, the sound it made would echo throughout the open room.

Over and over he'd do it again; running up just to get the speed he needed to get the power he needed, but each time, he'd get halfway down the mat and his routine, through the whips and handsprings alone and then he'd be staggering off the side of it and onto the crash mats that lined each side of the spring-loaded floor. One particular move. It was just one move and no matter what he did, he couldn't get it right anymore. Twisting too late, twisting too early, completely missing the mat when he twisted too much or didn't twist enough.

So back he went to the beginning. Running, cartwheel, handspring, whip, whip, barani back, layout, whip, and then… the dreaded skill he couldn't pull off that had him landing on his back that time with a loud thud on the mat, knocking the wind out of him as he stared up at the rafters in the ceiling.

It frustrated him to no end that he couldn't do it, but he knew that's what happened when you didn't do anything for nearly 6 months. He'd lost it.

Lucy was leaning with her elbows on the railing of the loft, the sheet from the bed wrapped around her. She'd been awake since Bickslow got up but she honestly didn't want to move from the bed, but she'd decided to go and investigate the noise that was coming from the main floor.

So she watched as time after time, Bickslow ran up to the springy floor, watching as he did flip after flip, all within a second of the last. Lucy had never known he could do anything like that, and the fact that she was still learning things about him was something she loved.

Lucy was in awe, honestly. The way he looked so graceful when he rotated himself in the air to the way she swore she could see each muscle rippling as he moved (the lack of shirt was also something she loved). She could barely do a cartwheel, and there he was, able to do it and things beyond that like it was the easiest thing in the world.

She knew that Bickslow wasn't excessively strong, and she'd known that for a while. Lucy also knew that that was only because he didn't need to be physically strong. He was a long-range mage so he rarely got involved in actual combat. What she was seeing then made her realise that he was _powerful_. Not only that, but his strength was a different kind.

When she thought of strong people in the guild, it wasn't a surprise that her mind would instantly wander to people like Erza, Gildarts, Natsu, and Laxus; hell, even Elfman. They were all the types of people who were physically strong. And sure, Bickslow was physically strong (obviously), but it was… different. While people like Erza and Natsu were strong because they got physically involved in fights, Bickslow was strong in a slightly different sense because he employed every muscle to push himself into the air.

It was to keep him out of the way of trouble, unlike the rest of her team.

But as she watched without him realising she was awake, she also saw that each time he'd get to a certain skill, he'd mess it up in some way, dropping his head in frustration as he walked back to the start. That meant she also saw when he'd landed flat on his back on the springy floor with a loud thud, and honestly, it looked like it hurt.

 _Damn, I'm getting out of shape_ , Bickslow thought as he breathed heavily, still trying to catch his breath from the strenuous activity. He turned his head from where he lay on the floor, looking up to the loft that was on his side. "Morning." He called as he grinned.

"Morning," Lucy called back, "That looked like it hurt."

"It did," He said, sitting up slowly and wincing slightly from the pain that shot down his spine, "Are you still going back to the guild today?" Bickslow asked, recalling one of their conversations from the night before and how she'd need to leave in the morning before her team start freaking out again.

"Yeah. I should probably leave soon an-" She couldn't even finish her own sentence as she sneezed, biting her tongue in the process. " _Anyway_ , was what I was going to say." She said, sniffling; then, "You should keep working on whatever it is you're trying to do. You'll get it eventually." She said with a smile as she turned from the railing, dropping the sheet as she walked towards the small bathroom that was up there.

His eyes followed her until she was out of sight and he pushed himself back up as he chuckled to himself. _Not so shy anymore_ , he thought as he stretched out his back once finally standing.

He wasn't going to leave until he got it back. And somehow, just Lucy believing it in even though she didn't really understand it was enough to make _him_ believe he'd be able to do it.

* * *

 **Well, the Bickslow being a gymnast thing kind of just... came out of nowhere, but I think it works. Had to dive into my memory for some of those terms though, LOL. I did trampolining/gymnastics/tumbling for a bit when I was kid (tramp until I was about 13 so about 7-8 years until I stopped due to too many injuries from the damn sport), so it was honestly kind of fun to write down those parts. A nice trip down memory lane.**

 **On another note, because my brain works better if I can see things laid out, I have all of the 'milestones' in their relationship in a calendar, and their first date is listed as being on the 25th and I thought that was cute. If anyone is interested in the full list of dates used (instead of just going off like, 'a week ago', 'a few days' etc etc) then send me a message or something. I just needed to have it for my own reference hehe.**

 **Anyway, bit of a random chapter, I guess. Hope you enjoyed it either way!**

Side note: The _He Might Be the One_ epilogue... I'm still trying to get over it. My heart melted at all of the adorableness and the last part, oh god. I was not in a state to be reading that at 3AM LOL.

BixLu week though... Yeah, you can expect me to be taking part in that. My uni work might suffer, but that's okay hehe.

 **\- April**


	25. Chapter 25

**Hm, not sure what happened with the updating on yesterday's chapter. Hopefully this fixes it.**

 **Shorter chapter just because I plan on doing something big with the next one. :D**

* * *

When Bickslow finally managed to get the move perfectly executed and he was able to actually get all the way down the runway and land on the landing mat like he was supposed to, he couldn't contain his excitement, jumping up and yelling before he fell back onto the softer mat, laughing to himself. After so many hours of running and flipping only to mess it up over and over again, it was a great feeling. Every muscle in his body was hurting and he was exhausted, but he still had to do it one more time to make sure it wasn't a fluke, and boy, when he did it again he felt even better.

So when he made his way into the guild the next day, still aching from nearly a week of having done more exercise that he'd done in a long time, he went straight for the table where Laxus was once again sitting with Levy and Gajeel.

A quick glance over his shoulder at where the majority of Team Natsu were seated made him raise an eyebrow as he sat down. "What up with them?" He asked, cocking his head to the side to motion to the other table.

Levy looked up from the notes she had been working on, a small mischievous smile on her face as she looked towards the group. Erza's nose was as red as her hair as she looked like she was on the verge of falling asleep while still sitting up. Natsu actually looked like he was asleep, though he was wearing a few extra layers which was an odd site, and Wendy coughed into her hand as Carla passed her a tissue box. Gray was keeping his distance from the ill-looking group, watching them distastefully from a few tables over where he sat with Juvia.

"They've all come down with the flu, it seems. I guess their bodies didn't cope too well with adjusting to the temperature again from their job," The Script mage said. "Freed ended up putting up runes around their table just so they wouldn't get anyone else sick since they won't go home and rest." She finished with a quiet sigh.

As Bickslow looked over his shoulder at the group again, he finally realised something was missing. Not so much something, more _someone_. He scrambled up from the table and made for the door before he backtracked, leaning against the table. "She's at home, right?" He asked quietly. He didn't even have to say her name for them to know who he was talking about since really, who else would he mean? So as Levy nodded, he made his way for the door once again, not hearing her giggle as he walked away.

"I wonder how he'll feel when he finds out Loke's been keeping her company all morning…"

* * *

Lucy pulled the three blankets she had on her bed up to her ears as she brought her knees up to her chest, trying her best to warm herself up since she was still shivering slightly. _What I wouldn't give to have Natsu here_ , she thought. Natsu was always good at keeping her warm, but since he was also sick (something that was also rare), he couldn't be.

"Here, Lucy." Loke's gentle voice said as he placed the honey and lemon tea down on her nightstand as he sat down on the edge of the bed to watch his master sit up slowly.

"Thanks, Loke." She whispered, not having the energy to do much else. As she took the first sip of the warm tea, closing her eyes as she felt the liquid warm up her insides. She honestly hated honey and lemon tea, but when she was sick, she could live off the stuff. It was weird.

As she continued taking small sips at the tea, fighting to keep her eyes open, she looked around at her apartment. She'd only gotten back from Hargeon in the middle of the day and it was only 24-hours later and the place was already disgusting, and really, that had only been from that morning alone, since when she went to bed the night before she was only feeling a little bit under the weather.

She cringed when she saw just how many tissues and empty tissue boxes were scattered around the floor of her bed. Her head hurt too much and she couldn't even begin to count them so she just closed her eyes again and focused on the tea, because if she focused on just how many germs were floating around her usually tidy apartment, she was going to start feeling nauseous again.

Once she'd placed the cup back down on top of her nightstand delicately, sliding back under her blankets to get warm once again, she felt like she could be asleep in under a minute with how exhausted she was.

"Lokeeeee," She mumbled into the pillow, "I think I'mma get some rest now." In other words, she wanted her lion spirit to get the hell out of her apartment so she could sleep peacefully. There was no way she'd be able to force his gate closed if she'd tried so she just had to hope he'd go back on his own. It wasn't like she was complaining about him being there either, because she was incredibly grateful he was since he was really the only one who could open his gate on his own magic for long enough to actually look after her.

With a sigh, Loke stood up and picked the empty cup again, "Of course, Lucy." He whispered with a smile before walking through to her small kitchen, washing up the cup and placing it in the dish rack, and with a final glance over at the form curled up under the blankets, he returned to the Spirit World.

Lucy smiled softly into her pillow as she closed her eyes again, already feeling herself drift off into sleep.

* * *

A knock on the door woke the blonde from what felt only like a minute of peaceful sleep when it had actually been three-quarters of an hour. She didn't have the energy to get out of bed to answer it and she was finally warm so there was no way she was leaving her blankets. "It's open." She shouted as loud as she could.

Bickslow pushed the door open when he heard what sounded like 'it's open'. He really wasn't sure. When he pushed the door closed behind him, a wide grin spread across his face as his tongue hung from his mouth. He honestly felt terrible for doing so, but the way Lucy was curled up under what looked like a mountain of blankets was a little entertaining.

"Hey." Lucy whispered with a small smile as she pushed her hair behind her ear.

"Jeez, you look terrible." Bickslow mumbled as he navigated through the minefield of wadded up tissues and crumpled boxes towards the bed, lifting up his visor in the process.

"Gee, thanks," She replied with as much sarcasm as she could muster, crinkling up her nose when Bickslow's path changed course and he disappeared into her bathroom before coming back out with her small wastebasket and going around her room to clean up all of the mess she'd made with the tissues. "Ewww, don't do that. That's disgusting."

He chuckled as he went back to the bathroom to wash his hands. After drying his hands, he walked back into the main room and over to the bed, climbing over the now almost overflowing wastebasket to sit on the bed. "Yeah, but I don't care." He said quietly before leaning down, going to kiss her just to prove his point, only to end up kissing her cheek as she turned her head at the last second and let out a slight giggle.

"Stop it," Lucy said through her laughter as he held her face, peppering kiss after kiss to her cheek as she tried to get away, though failing dismally with her lack of energy. "You're gonna get sick."

"No I'm not."

"Yes you will!"

"No, I really won't. I never get sick," He said, sitting up again, "Now move over."

Lucy rolled her eyes as best she could as she moved over slightly, pulling the blankets back up to her ears and curling up under them. "Never?" She mumbled into the pillow when she got comfortable again, already feeling her lids get heavy again.

"Never." Bickslow said with a grin as he moved up the bed, leaning against the headboard.

She closed her eyes just because it was getting too hard to keep them open, then, after a moment of silence, she mumbled into the pillow again, "Did you get the flip thingy yesterday?" Lucy asked.

A short laugh from Bickslow as he looked down at the blonde, "Yeah, eventually."

"Is it cool?"

"Very."

She hummed in response as she buried her face in the pillow even more, once again already feeling herself drift off.

Bickslow didn't mind the silence that followed, because he'd expected it before he got there. He didn't care that she was already half asleep (if not completely asleep), because he'd just wanted to be there with her.

The fact she was sick was fine, because he really didn't get sick. Ever. Bickslow couldn't even remember the last time he'd had just a cold, it had been so long ago. He'd hung around Ever and Freed when they'd been sick and he'd always been fine. A few hours with Lucy was going to be fine, he assured himself.

When he slid down the bed a tiny bit to make himself more comfortable, careful not to disturb Lucy, he looked towards the nightstand, picking up the Seith magic book he'd given her. As he brought his knees up slowly, he rested the large book on top of them, flicking open to where a small piece of paper was tucked between the pages, marking her spot. _Ah, the basics of Souls_ , Bickslow thought as he skimmed over the paragraphs.

Then, after a few minutes of the only sounds in the room being the pages being turned and her steady breathing, he froze. Everything froze. Time completely stopped.

It came out as a barely audible whisper and Bickslow could only wonder if he even heard it at all and it wasn't his imagination playing tricks on him.

"Mm, I love you."

When he was finally able to move to look down at the blonde incredulously, his brow furrowed in confusion when she still looked like she'd been asleep the entire time.

 _What the hell just happened?!_

It didn't make sense to Bicksow. Barely a month ago, she'd been apparently falling in love with him and then he went and did something stupid and somehow, they'd gotten back to a point where they were fine and everything was okay; hell, everything was more than okay.

But in that last month, she'd been gone for three of those weeks and they'd barely spent a week together out of that entire month. There was no way she could have fallen in love with the guy in that amount of time. Right?

 _Fuck, could she?_

Bickslow could feel his heart hammering away in his chest as he stared back down at the book, not being able to focus on the words on the page anymore. He didn't understand any of it because after all, there was the issue of whether she'd said it at all and it really wasn't his imagination.

* * *

Bickslow had stayed until it was dark. Lucy had barely moved in the several hours he'd been there, only rolling over once and then she'd stayed like that. When he finally got up from the bed, he instantly went over to her desk to write out a small note for her when she eventually woke up, saying he'd be back at some point tomorrow.

He'd been in a complete daze since she had maybe or maybe not mumbled those three little worlds. The game changing words. He wasn't even capable of thinking about it anymore. There was nothing in his head apart from those three words.

When he got back to the guild, he spied Evergreen at the bar and instantly went over there, his hand wrapping around her elbow as he tried to drag her away from Elfman. "Ever, I need your help." Because maybe, just maybe, talking about what the fuck had just happened with someone of the same gender might actually help.

"Oi! What do you-" The self-proclaimed Fairy Queen stopped when she saw the dazed expression on Bickslow's face as he pulled her through the guild, "Woah, what happened?" She asked.

"In a minute." Bickslow mumbled, running a hand through his hair. _Wait, what? Oh fuck. I left my visor there._ He slumped down on the bench next to Levy when he got to their table, not really noticing that he basically sat down on top of the small woman.

Freed gave him a concerning look from across the table, "What appears to be the matter Bickslow?"

"Uh… well…" He didn't know if he should even be talking about at all, but he felt like he really needed to. After all, they'd probably tell him if he was insane or not. Maybe. "She might have just said she loves me… maybe." He mumbled as he stared down at the patterns etched in the wood.

Evergreen shrieked, Levy squealed, Freed gasped, Gajeel dropped the mug he was drinking from and spilled it all over himself, and Laxus just looked like he hadn't heard it at all.

"Did you say it back?" Levy asked, her book long forgotten.

Bickslow shook his head as he folded his arms before lifting a hand up to bite on his nail, for once not caring about the polish he was chipping.

"How could you not say it back?" Evergreen shrieked, leaning over the table to swat him with her fan.

"I… I… can't… I don't think… I don't know." He sighed, "I don't even know if she actually said it and it wasn't just my imagination or something."

"Eh?"

"Well, she was half asleep, so really… she probably could have been talking about the pillow and not me, if she'd even said it at all."

"Probably the pillow." Gajeel scoffed, the smirk on his face instantly falling when Levy elbowed him in the side.

"So… does that mean you don't love her?" Levy asked quietly as they all stared at Bickslow intently.

"I… don't know." And that was the problem, because he really didn't know if he did or not. The entire dating thing he could figure out, but love… was something else entirely and it honestly terrified him.

* * *

Bickslow didn't get much sleep when he eventually left the guild for the night. In fact, he didn't think he got any sleep. Instead, he was staring up at the ceiling the entire time without a single thought in his head. Just… nothing.

But when the morning sun started streaming in through his window like it always did, he pulled himself out of bed slowly. Laxus had found a job in Clover that would get them all out for a couple of days, and honestly, Bickslow needed that. If anything, his team (plus Levy and Gajeel) had just made him feel worse for not knowing if he did love her or not.

And it was kind of funny, because if anything, those were the three words he wanted her to say the most, yet when she did, he couldn't do anything. He wasn't happy – he was just terrified.

When he reached her apartment a little while later, he stared at the door for around a minute. He didn't know whether it was worth getting his visor back or not.

 _No, I need it for jobs, I know that._

He knocked on the door lightly, and when he heard her mumble something from inside her apartment, he pushed the door open slowly.

"It's not even 7AM, what are you doing here?" Lucy mumbled with a small smile as she rubbed her eyes.

"Going on a job for a day or so and I needed my visor." He said, walking over to the coffee table where his visor was still sitting, picking it up and twisting it in his hands before moving to sit on the edge of the bed as she slowly sat up, adjusting the pillows accordingly. "Wait, I didn't wake you, did I?"

"I've been awake for a while." She whispered with another small smile, trying to ignore the wave of nausea that washed over her as she sat up.

"You feeling any better?"

"Eh, I'm better than-" Lucy stopped mid-sentence as her hand flew to her mouth as she scrambled from under the mountain of blankets and towards the bathroom.

Bickslow winced when the sound of her retching could be heard through the curtain separating the rooms. He got up from the bed and walked towards the bathroom, dropping his visor back on the coffee table on the way.

"Jeez…" He muttered when he knelt down next to her, gathering up her hair behind her and keeping it out of the way. Then, when she rested her head on her arm, breathing heavily, he pushed the lever on the back of the toilet. "Do you want me to stay?" he asked quietly. Because even if he didn't know if he was in love with her or not, he still cared about her a lot and when the people you care about are sick, you look after them. He'd choose Lucy over a job if she wanted him to stay. Any day.

"No… I'll be fine." She whispered as she stood up on shaky legs, going over to the small sink. "Loke will probably-"

"My apologies, Princess."

Bickslow rolled his eyes at the impeccably timed entrance of the lion spirit pushing the curtains apart and walking into the bathroom. He stood up slowly, folding his arms as Loke pushed past Bickslow to scoop the blonde up in his arms before carrying her back out into her living area.

"Is there anything you need?" Loke asked tenderly as he took a seat on the edge of the bed where Lucy was curled up again.

"I'm okay." Lucy whispered, patting the pillow as she got comfortable.

Bickslow glowered from across the room as he picked up his visor again. He could feel the jealously bubble up inside of him, just because he thought _he_ should be the one sitting there and looking after her; Not Loke. Not the stupid spirit that's been in love with her for God knows how long.

"Bicks?"

His glare dissipated as the quiet voice brought him back from his thoughts of what he'd do to the pesky lion if he took advantage of her. He moved to kneel down in front of her with a weak smile. "Yeah?"

"I'm fine, really," She whispered. She knew Bickslow didn't like Loke being there and as much as she hated the fact the guy had just seen her puke the entire contents of her stomach up, she still knew he was worried. "Go catch a train."

A quiet sigh escaped his lips as he stood up slowly, "Fine," He said sadly before leaning back down to press a kiss to her cheek softly. "Hey, that reminds me. Freed had a somewhat brilliant and stupid idea. Come to Hargeon on Saturday. With your team."

"Hargeon?"

"Yeah, the gym." He grinned, because really, apart from being a stupid idea, it was absolutely brilliant. _Gotta hand it to Freed_ , he thought. And then his grin wavered, "If you're better, I mean."

She narrowed her eyes at the Seith mage from where she lay curled up under the blankets, "What are you planning?" Lucy asked.

Bickslow grinned again, "You won't know unless you come." He glanced towards the clock as he straightened up, "Shit, I've gotta go before I get electrocuted. Get some rest, okay?"

She nodded into the pillow as Bickslow walked backwards away from the bed, "Have fun." She mumbled.

As Bickslow clipped his visor back in place and continued heading towards the door, he turned over his shoulder to glare at Loke, seeing the smug grin on his face, he pointed at him. "You better fucking look after her, Loke."

* * *

 **So... I need some help with the next chapter. I'm wondering how long I should draw out this whole 'love' issue. Thoughts?**

 **\- April**


	26. Chapter 26

**Thank you all so much for the reviews on the last chapter. Definitely helped with deciding where it's going. With that being said, it's not going to be as simple as I'm guessing some of you would hope. :P**

 **Kura JIO - If you can tell, your reviews over the last few chapters have definitely helped with inspiration for a lot of this chapter, so I hope you can tell and thank you hehe.**

* * *

"Come on, Luce," Natsu groaned as he followed the blonde through the busy morning streets. "Tell us where you're taking us."

Lucy shook her head with a wide grin as she rounded a corner. "You'll just have to wait. We're almost there."

Lucy had been simultaneously excited and scared about the possible reason for Bickslow asking her to come to Hargeon. Mostly scared when it came to her team being invited, especially when Bickslow was terrified of what Erza would do to him when she found out about them.

The only reason her team had decided to follow her to Hargeon after Lucy couldn't offer an explanation as to why was because Erza said it would be good to get out for a bit after they'd all been cooped up in home or at the guild for a couple of days. Still, the only reason they were out at all was because Wendy had received some remedies from Porlyusica the morning before and within twelve-hours, they'd all been back to their usual selves.

"Hm, I wasn't aware this building was being used anymore." Erza mused as she followed Lucy into the small entrance area of the Raijinshuu's gym.

"Yeah, well…" Lucy giggled as she pushed the second door open, leaning her back against it to keep it open and allow her friends to pass through into the main room. "Apparently it always was."

Natsu had instantly run off to where Laxus was lifting weights and yelling at Gajeel who was leaning on another piece of equipment while eating the weights themselves. "Wow! This is so cool! Oh, Laxus! Laxus and Gajeel are here! Let's fight, Laxus!" The over-zealous pink-haired Dragon Slayer had screeched, only to be sent unconscious by a stray bolt of lightning.

"I'm beginning to wonder why I agreed to this…" Laxus muttered under his breath.

When Lucy walked in, the door slamming closed behind her, the first thing she noticed was how the layout was slightly different. The various blocks and mats that were in the centre had been moved off to the sides as Freed and Evergreen sparred in the air, the runes that had been set up from floor to ceiling and surrounding the area getting lit up each up their attacks hit a section of it.

"Damn, this is nice." Gray said as he moved closer to the centre, wanting to get a close-up of the fight.

"I agree. This is marvellous." Erza added as she looked over the building before turning to Lucy. "Who owns this?"

"Laxus and the Raijinshuu." She replied with a smile.

Erza nodded, "Interesting. It's definitely set up for each of their personal fortes."

"Indeed it is." Freed chimed in as he walked closer to the two, wrapping a towel around his neck. "I thought it might be a good idea for Team Natsu to join us for today… and Gajeel and Levy. If anything, it allows our teams to get closer and after that joint-mission back in August, it might be useful should we ever be put in the same kind of situation."

"Oh, of course." Erza replied, already having requipped into something more suitable. "Thank you for inviting us, Freed. Now if you'll excuse me… I believe Natsu is slowly becoming conscious again." She said as she walked away from both Freed and Lucy and towards the Dragon Slayers.

Lucy narrowed her eyes at Freed as he continued to watch Erza walk away. "Is that really all you're planning?"

"Honestly, no." Freed replied, turning back to Lucy. "Well, sort of. It could be good for your team to see the two of you together in a friendly situation, before you do decide to break the news to Erza and Gray."

"Huh… that's actually not a bad idea…" She mused, looking around the room. "Still would have been nice to know exactly what was going on…" Lucy said, trailing off when she saw Bickslow hanging from the trapeze down the end by his feet.

Freed smiled weakly, "My apologies… I didn't actually fill Bickslow in on all of the details until this morning when we got here. He only knew the first part until then."

* * *

Lucy sat watching everyone from one side of the gym, sitting on a stack of thick mats with Levy who had brought a pile of books with her.

Natsu and Gajeel were fighting down one end, Erza and Laxus were stuck in a surprisingly even match inside the runes in the centre of the room, Gray and Freed were working on escaping Rune prisons and dispersing Ice Make magic, and Evergreen was checking out her manicure as Bickslow was balancing one-handed on one of his babies.

"So… anyone said those three little words yet?"

Lucy made a sound that resembled a squeak as she turned to Levy, seeing the smirk on her face. Lucy instantly went a deep shade of red as she tried to form her words. "W-what? No!" She hissed. Lucy had no idea what she'd whispered in her half-asleep, bedridden state.

Levy gawked at the woman. "Seriously?"

"Seriously!"

"Wow…" Levy muttered. _Maybe she really does have no idea she said it?_ "But… do you love him?"

Lucy looked down when she felt her face heat up even more. She'd never really thought about it. Sure, she'd been falling in love with him, but was she already there? She watched Bickslow from where she sat, a wide smile spreading across her face when he fell from where he was perched on one of his babies as he sneezed. "I don't know… maybe?" She said as she turned back to Levy before they both broke out into a fit of squealing and giggling.

 _Probably_ , Lucy thought.

Both Laxus and Gajeel were too busy listening to the conversation between Lucy and Levy to focus on what they were doing, thus causing them both to lose their fights within a matter of seconds of each other.

Laxus took his defeat in stride, since out of anyone, Erza wasn't so bad to lose to. And besides, it served him right for eavesdropping.

Gajeel on the other hand… well, he never likes losing to Natsu.

"Shut up, Salamander!"

Natsu was jumping around, laughing like an idiot, "Hah! Gajeel lost, Gajeel lost!"

"It doesn't count! I wasn't paying attention!"

"That was stupid." Natsu responded as he folded his arms behind his head.

"How the hell were you not listening to that conversation?!" Gajeel shot back, gawking at the other Dragon Slayer.

"What conversation?"

Gajeel could only throw his hands up in the air in frustration before he walked away and towards Levy. After all, the blue-haired woman had his favourite post-fight snacks already prepared in a small container – mixed nuts and bolts.

* * *

It was a little after noon and by that point, everyone had rotated and changed 'partners' and what they were doing. Erza and Evergreen were the ones in the runes set up in the middle, Natsu had been shot down by a single lightning strike again, Gajeel was back to chewing on pieces of Laxus' weights, and Bickslow was being a show-off with his fancy flips, and honestly, Lucy thought it was pretty great.

It was only when Bickslow was getting dizzy and his head was starting to hurt did he finally stop. He looked towards the smiling women who had been perched atop a few of the stacked mats the entire morning and a wide grin spread across his face, his tongue lolling from his mouth. "Yo, Cosplayer!" He shouted across the hall, "Come over here."

"What? Why?" Lucy yelled back, her eyes wide in her confusion.

"You've been sitting on your ass for 3 hours. Come do something productive."

 _Is he calling me lazy?!_ She turned to glare at Levy beside her who was snickering, only to turn into full blown laughter as she looked. Lucy couldn't even be mad at Bickslow when she turned back to him, just because of that ridiculous grin of his.

So with a huff, she slid to the edge of the mats and hopped down, shaking her head slightly as she walked. After all, Bickslow had been right – she had been sitting on her ass for 3 hours… but she hadn't been doing nothing. No, Levy had been squeezing details about her sex life out of her after she'd moved on from the whole 'Maybe, maybe not actually in love with Bickslow' conundrum. She still had no idea that her mouth had already answered that question for her a few days prior.

"So what exactly will be classified as 'productive' to you?" Lucy asked contemptuously.

Bickslow shrugged, "Well, there is something I can think of… but it can't really be done here," He said with a wide grin, chuckling when the blonde's face turned bright red. "Anything you want to try or learn or something?" He asked, sniffling slightly. _I refuse to believe I am getting sick_ , he told himself.

Lucy unfolded her arms as she looked around at all of the mats and pieces of equipment she still couldn't put names to before she focused on spring-loaded floor just next to them and her eyes lit up. She pointed towards it. "That."

"Nope," He said with a small smirk, "Could start with the basics though."

"Fine. Like what?"

Bickslow walked over to the rolled out carpet that ran next to the tumbling floor. "Can you do a handstand?"

"No…" Lucy said quietly as she looked down slightly. _I can't even do a handstand. Why the hell would I think I can do all of those fancy tricks?!_

Bickslow let out a short laugh as he pointed to the floor just in front of him. "Do a handstand." He insisted.

She stared at Bickslow and his smug grin ( _stupidly_ , she added in afterthought) for a short moment before she unfolded her arms with a sigh. _At least I'm not wearing a skirt_ , she thought.

With a steadying breath, she leant forward, placing her hands flat on the soft carpet and kicking her feet up. When she could feel herself falling towards her back as soon as she'd gotten close to being upright, Bickslow's hands grabbed her ankles and stopped her from falling backwards. "Point your toes." He said, completely ignoring the fact that by that point, everyone else in the room had stopped to watch them – including Erza and Gray.

"I wasn't aware Lucy was interested in learning any of that," Erza mused as she took the bottle of water that Evergreen handed her. "I could have taught her to do a handstand."

Evergreen smirked as she opened her own bottle of water, watching the pair intently. "Oh, just leave them. Bickslow's good at that kind of stuff."

Lucy's hands were starting to get sore from the unfamiliar weight on them and she could feel her arms beginning to shake. "This is… starting to hurt…" She said, blowing the hair out of her eyes as it hung down.

"Fine. Come down care-" He said as he let go of her ankles to let her get back to standing on her own, yet he'd paused when she started swaying and fell flat on her back. "-fully…"

Lucy smiled as she sat up, leaning back on her hands as Bickslow shook his head at her, "Maybe we try handstands again later?"

"Yeah, maybe," Bickslow agreed as he helped her to her feet. "Um… how about we try this now," He pointed to a spot on the ground as he moved to stand near it, "Stand here."

So she did exactly as he asked. "Done." She said with a smirk.

He rolled his eyes at the blonde when he realised she was mocking him. "Hands up. And then lean back."

"Wait, what?" She asked, looking incredulously at the man. "Do you want me to fall over again?"

"You're not gonna fall. I prom-" He turned away as he sneezed, shaking his head lightly when he turned back. " _Promise_. Make sure your feet are apart." He finished, sniffling again.

So when she put her arms back up again and spread her feet, she looked at Bickslow with another smirk. "Never get sick, huh?" She said as she started leaning back slowly.

"Shut up. I'm not sick." He mumbled as one hand rested on her back and the other on her stomach. "Keep going until your hands touch the floor."

When her hands connected with the floor, it had honestly been unexpected and had happened sooner than she'd thought it would. She adjusted her hands and feet a tiny bit, just to make it a bit more comfortable even though she could already feel the muscles in her arms and legs start to hurt.

"Now, kick your feet up and go into another handstand," When he saw the hesitation in her face he added, "Don't worry, I'll help you. On the count of 3, okay?"

She nodded – or tried to, really – from the position she was in. She felt Bickslow's hands move – one shifting slightly on her back and the other going to just behind her knee.

"Okay, 1… 2... 3." And on the third count, Lucy tried her best to kick her legs up from the position she was in but it didn't matter since Bickslow did most of the work for her. He waited until he had a secure grip on her legs again before continuing. "See? That wasn't so ha-" Another sneeze interrupted him.

Lucy let out a sound that resembled a short laugh. "I would laugh if I didn't think I'd fall. You are _so_ getting sick."

Bickslow scoffed. _Should let her almost fall_ , he thought. "That's not very nice. Tell me again why I'm with you?" He said quietly.

Although she wouldn't laugh, she could grin. "'Cause you love me." And when she realised what she'd said, the grin was lost instantly. She hadn't meant to say it, but damn it, Levy had got the issue stuck in her head.

But before she could even curse herself under her breath or try and correct it and make things less awkward, Bickslow's response came just as quickly.

"Damn straight I do."

And then they both froze, along with all three of the Dragon Slayers who had heard it, and then Levy after Gajeel was pulled from his stupor just to whisper in his girlfriend's ear.

 _WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!_

Bickslow's brows knitted together as he wondered just what in the hell had made him say that, because really, it just came out before he could even think of a response.

Two days ago, he was quite certain that he was unsure of whether or not he loved the blonde, but he'd also been thinking about it non-stop for those two days, and that was partly because he had Evergreen breathing down his neck about it constantly.

"When you know, you'll just know." She'd said, and honestly, it had made Bickslow walk away laughing because it was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard. How the hell was that piece of 'advice' supposed to help him? He'd wanted to know what it was supposed to feel like to be in love with someone, because maybe it would tell him whether he was or not. But no, Evergreen wouldn't tell him that. Instead, she was the one who walked away laughing.

But whether he knew if he actually did love Lucy or not, he knew that he cared about her, a lot.

Either way, none of that explained just why his mouth decided he knew better than _he_ did, and honestly, that made no sense at all.

Lucy could only ignore the fact that her hands felt like they were on fire the longer she stayed on them. She couldn't, however, ignore the fact that her heart was beating a million miles an hour in her chest and she was honestly starting to feel lightheaded, and she didn't know whether it was from being upside down or if it was from what Bickslow had just said.

Either way, she needed to get back on her feet – literally.

"Uh… Bicks?" She said, her voice wavering slightly.

But Bickslow was still out of it, still lost in his thoughts.

"Bicks, please…" Lucy whispered when she felt her arms start shaking again and her eyes were getting harder to keep open. "I need to come down now…" Because even though he was holding her legs, it was only to keep her steady, not to keep her upright.

It wasn't long after that did her eyes finally close and she lost the ability to hold herself up. She was conscious long enough to feel herself slipping from Bickslow's grip slowly and towards the ground, and then she was out.

Coincidentally, that's what it had taken for Bickslow to finally snap out of his thoughts. There was a brief second of confusion when his brain tried to comprehend what was going on and then he was falling to his knees as his arms somehow manoeuvred her as she fell, just so she wouldn't land on her head and completely hurt herself. "Oh shit, Lucy?!" He said, the panic evident in his voice as he laid her flat on the mat.

 _Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit._

"Take her upstairs." Erza commanded as the group came running up from where they'd all been.

Bickslow was pulled back by the collar of his shirt as Natsu leant down to pick her limp body up before turning to the stairs, the rest of her team and Levy following behind them. Bickslow, without thinking, automatically went to follow them, only to be pulled back again as Freed, Evergreen, and Gajeel all moved to stand in front of him.

"What the fuck are you guys-"

"She just passed out; she'll be fine." Laxus said from behind him.

"Besides, we need to talk about something else right now." Evergreen said as she wrapped her hand around Bickslow's shoulder, turning him and pulling him towards the corner of the guild that was farthest away from the loft.

And Bickslow didn't contest it, because he knew they were right. She'd be fine, because she had her team. Plus, if he did go up there, he'd have to explain it to Gray and Erza on his own and that wouldn't go well. There was no way he was having that conversation when he had a bigger problem to deal with.

* * *

Bickslow had been pushed to sit on one of the other piles of mats that sat down one end. His foot was tapping on the ground impatiently as he kept glancing up toward the loft. _Fuck, I want to be up there!_

But he still knew he couldn't be, partly because his team and Gajeel were blocking him from getting up as they all stared down at the panicked and worried Seith mage.

"So, wanna explain that whole declaration thing that just happen?" Laxus asked as he folded his arms across his broad chest. Everyone was just as confused as Bickslow was when it came to him blurting that out, because really, everyone thoughthe was still unsure of his feelings, even though Bickslow was the only one who was actually unaware of what he really felt.

Bickslow glanced towards Laxus, "What? I don't even know what happened, it just came out before I even got a chance to think about it!"

"So is it true?"

"I still don't know!"

Evergreen groaned as she rolled her eyes. "Can't we just tell him?" She complained.

"Are you sure that is a wise decision?" Freed asked, the uncertainty evident in his voice.

"Come on, he's the only one who doesn't see it!" She said in a loud whisper as she leant in closer to the Rune mage.

Bickslow looked back to his friends. "See what?"

Evergreen pointed towards him. "My point exactly."

Laxus shrugged before he looked back down to Bickslow, then to Evergreen again. "I was going to start a wager on how long it would take him to realise, but sure, this will be fun. I'm not saying it though." He mumbled.

"Well, I'm not doing it." Evergreen said.

"Me neither." Freed said as he took a step back before they all turned to Gajeel who looked between them all when he realised he was the last one.

"You're fuckin' kidding me, right? Shit, why can't Shrimp do it?"

"Because she's busy trying to keep Blondie from coming downstairs at the moment." Laxus said as both Dragon Slayers turned their heads in the direction of the loft.

Then they all looked back to Bickslow who was still stuck in a state of panic and confusion. "What the hell is going on?" Bickslow asked.

"You're been in love with her for a while, dude." Gajeel said with his signature smirk.

"What the fuck? No I haven't!" Bickslow yelled as he stood up, only to be pushed back down by Evergreen.

"Yeah, you kinda have," The self-proclaimed Fairy Queen said as she pointed her folded paper fan at him, "Don't even try and say you're not, because we've all been waiting for you to realise it this entire time."

"Wait, the entire time?"

"Well, at least half of it." Gajeel shrugged, pulling a handful of bolts from his pocket before throwing them in his mouth with a loud crunch.

Bickslow stared at the space behind the group as his thoughts took over again. There was no way he was in love with Lucy. He would have realised he was falling in love with her, right? Or maybe he'd just been too happy and he'd missed it?

 _No, I definitely would have realised if I actually loved her or not, because I'd probably be telling Laxus and Gajeel to go fuck themselves so they can let me get past so I can go upstairs._

But he really wanted to do that, more so than usual. She'd fainted and he knew it was his fault, somehow. He needed to be up there to make sure she was actually okay. There was a part of him that didn't care the rest of her team was up there because he didn't believe they cared about her as much as he did.

And maybe that was the point – maybe he'd gotten everything mixed up and that was why he'd missed the possibility that he was actually falling in love with her. No, _fallen_ in love with her.

But it was still like he couldn't bring himself to believe it. That possibility terrified him.

"No… I don't… I don't understand." He whispered as he shook his head slowly.

"Fuck me, and I thought Salamander was stupid." Gajeel groaned.

Evergreen knelt down in front of Bickslow with a small smile. "Think about it, Bicks. You were miserable when she was gone for three weeks."

"Yeah, 'cause I missed her…"

"And how many times did we have to save your ass from getting hurt over the last two days because you were too busy worrying about her?"

Bickslow looked up, "Wait, what? You did?" And when they all nodded he looked back down, "Shit… sorry…"

"Blondie makes you happy, right?" Laxus asked softly.

"Pretty sure she's the reason for me being happy at this point…" Bickslow mumbled.

"And what does it feel like when you're around her?" Evergreen asked, the small smile still on her face. She knew they were slowly getting through to the man.

"Like… nothing else matters." _Because she's the only thing that matters._

Freed stepped closer as he looked down, "You care for her deeply, don't you?"

"More than I thought was possible."

"Did you realise how much you've changed in the last three months?"

"I… I guess." Bickslow shrugged. He did realise, but none of it really bothered him because he felt like it was for the better.

"And what was the reason?" Freed asked slowly.

"Her."

"But you don't care how much you've changed, do you?"

"No."

Somehow, Bickslow knew where the questions were going, and with each one, he was getting closer and closer to accepting the truth that he'd been ignoring.

But it was Laxus who delivered the final question after a few moments of silence, partly because he was bored of all the questions his team were giving him, and partly because he just wanted to hear his friend accept it because he'd watched the way his demeanour had changed over the last few months and minutes.

"So do you love her?" He asked.

And there was another moment's silence as Bickslow thought about his answer.

He cared about Lucy more than he could put into words and when he'd been out on his last job and she'd been at home sick, he hated himself because he'd wanted to be there looking after her. He should have stayed whether she'd wanted him to or not.

When she was happy, he was happy. When she smiled, he couldn't help but smile because the way it lit up her entire face was one of the most amazing things he'd ever seen, and he loved it. He loved her laugh and the way she could somehow always vaguely smell like strawberries.

In his own weird way, Bickslow loved that he'd seen her at her absolute worst. He'd seen her when she'd just woken up and her hair was a mess and her makeup had smudged and he'd seen her when she wasn't able to get out of bed. Hell, he'd seen her throwing up and he'd even held her hair back and honestly, vomit was one thing he never did. He usually just let Freed and Ever get it all over their own hair. But none of it fazed him.

Because between all of her strengths and flaws (the fact that she was a morning person was definitely a flaw in Bickslow's opinion), Bickslow still thought Lucy was perfect. He'd said it the first time he'd ever kissed her, and hell, did he mean it.

But regardless, Bickslow was slowly coming to terms with the fact that he did actually love Lucy. Somehow, he'd missed it happening and that seriously made him wonder, but he couldn't even deny that he'd fallen in love with her.

His friends were right.

He'd fallen in love with Lucy Heartfilia without noticing and it was something that simultaneously made him happy beyond all belief and scared the living daylights out of him.

He dropped his shoulders when he lowered his head more. "Yeah." Bickslow finally said, barely a whisper.

There was another moment's silence as a smile graced each of their faces because it was the one thing they'd been waiting for since Gajeel and Levy had filled them in on their adventures in double dating. Now that Bickslow had accepted it, Lucy was the only one who had to and then it was just a matter of them actually admitting it to each other, preferably not by blurting it out, accidentally.

"Fuck." Bickslow said as he shot up suddenly, causing each of them to jump slightly with the sudden movement. It was so unexpected that Bickslow was able to push past both the Dragon Slayers and head for the stairs, but he only got a few feet away before there was a sharp pain in his back that he knew all too well and he was on his stomach with the side of his face pressed into a mat. "Laxus, what the fuck?!" He yelled as Gajeel laughed.

"Can't let you go up there, Bicks," Laxus said with a shrug. "I'm not ready to be planning your funeral." Then, as he turned to head to his own corner of the gym, he muttered under his breath with a slight shake of his head, "Damn. Never thought I'd be saying that."

* * *

 **Well, that happened. This is the kind of stuff that happens when I deviate from the original plan and I can't tell if I like this or not, LOL.**

 **As usual, I hope it was okay...**

 **\- April**


	27. Chapter 27

**Just another shorter chapter to fill in the gap... didn't really want it in the next chapter. :)**

 **Kura JIO - Ramble more, please! You'd be surprised how much you influence this. I can see at times that it's hard to see that, but you really do. You're a massive help whether you realise it or not.**

 **And honestly, that applies to every single one of you who leaves a review!**

 **Now, on to the chapter!**

* * *

It wasn't long after Lucy's fainting spell did her team decide to leave, leaving just the Raijinshuu, Laxus, Gajeel, and Levy in the building. Bickslow had been laying in the net under the trapeze as they left, just because he knew that if he saw her leave, he'd want to go and make sure Lucy was okay.

And as soon as they'd gone, Freed had turned to Evergreen. "Well, I guess the runes I set up earlier were of no use…"

Bickslow's interest rose when he'd heard that, because as far as he was aware, the only runes in the entire building were the ones in the centre, and that was just so they didn't destroy the building when they sparred.

"What runes?" He asked from the net, sniffling slightly (still).

"Uh… well…" Evergreen mumbled, glancing between Freed and Laxus.

"I set up runes early this morning that would stop Erza and Gray from using their magic if yourself and Lucy were in the immediate area…" Freed said. "Basically, we forgot to tell you that we planned today just so you two would be able to tell Erza and Gray… with a lower possibility of your death being an outcome."

Bickslow crawled to the edge of the net to glare at his team. "You _forgot_?"

"Well… to be fair, you did kind of spring us with the whole declaration thing and plans changed." Evergreen said quietly.

"… Fair point."

* * *

By that night, Bickslow was sitting in the corner of his lounge, his legs crossed under him as he stared at the rug in front of him. He had a box of tissues next to him on the lounge and he'd ended up pulling the blanket from his bed.

He was sick, and it was Lucy's fault.

Lucy on the other hand couldn't wait to get out of her apartment. Erza had called Wendy over as soon as they'd got back to Magnolia just to check if she was fine and there was any lasting damage, and like she'd expected, she'd been fine. She wasn't used to being upside down and the pressure had caused her to faint, there was nothing else to it.

It was a little after 9PM by the time they'd all left, Natsu and Happy being the last ones because he'd wanted to ask her about Bickslow, but honestly, she didn't know the answer to his question because it was the same as Levy's – did she actually love Bickslow?

The answer was still the same too, that being that she didn't know. Maybe? Probably? That was the best she could give.

So when she finally reached his apartment, she didn't bother knocking on his door, just because she knew he never locked it and he didn't care if she just walked in.

When Lucy walked in, she didn't even say anything and neither did Bickslow. Instead, she just smiled weakly at the sight of him curled up under his duvet and walked over the lounge, lifted up the edge of the blanket and climbed under it before resting her head on his shoulder as she cuddled up to his side.

Then, after a while of just enjoying the silence and being in each other's company even though one of them was sick, Bickslow finally whispered, "Sorry for the handstand thing."

"It's fine. Sorry for the… other thing." Lucy mumbled. She didn't even have to say what she meant because she knew Bickslow figured it out.

"Do we uh… need to talk about that…?"

Lucy winced slightly as she pulled the blanket up higher. "Would you be mad at me if we didn't?" She asked quietly.

Even though Bickslow had blurted out his feelings – although Lucy wasn't sure if he'd meant it or not, but based on his reaction it had been as unexpected for him as it was for her, Lucy still wasn't sure of her own (as far as she was aware, anyway). She didn't want to have that conversation just yet.

But neither was Bickslow, whether Lucy knew it or not. Admitting his feelings to himself was one thing – and, as it turns out, was a thing he was still trying to understand completely – but admitting it to someone else, especially Lucy, was something else entirely. Even though he'd blurted out how he felt (accidentally), he still didn't think it really counted.

Because to Bickslow, until he was ready to say those three little words to her, it didn't count.

It didn't matter that Lucy had already said it, because whether or not she'd meant it in her half-asleep and bedridden state, she didn't know. Bickslow knew she was still unsure and he couldn't be mat at her for that, not when he'd been in the same situation just hours earlier. It wouldn't be fair to be mad at her for that.

"Kinda glad you said that." He whispered before reaching for the tissue box beside him to blow his nose. Then, after another short moment of silence, he tilted his head to rest on top of hers. "You're gonna get sick again." Bickslow mumbled.

Lucy shrugged slightly. "I don't care. If I do, we can be sick together." She said with a slight giggle – one that Bickslow couldn't help but chuckle at.

 _And this_ , Bickslow thought, _is why I love you._

He could admit that to himself.

Because if she was willing to sit there and keep him company even though she'd most likely end up sick again, then she really was amazing. Or insane. Or a mix of both, Bickslow realised.

* * *

It took Bickslow a week before he got better and was able to leave his apartment. Lucy had somehow only managed to only get the sniffles for a few days, so honestly, it could have been worse.

After that, Lucy and Team Natsu had gone out on another job which had her leaving a few days before what would be three months since their first date, and even though she'd rather be spending that day with Bickslow (somehow), she couldn't exactly explain why they needed to push a job back a few days, so she'd just had to get over it.

And honestly, Bickslow was a little disappointed that she'd be gone for it because three months of dating was a big thing, apparently. Even though since that day in the training building they'd been in a kind of awkward situation where they purposely avoided the conversation that they both knew they needed to have, they still cared about each other a lot.

So while Bickslow was still trying to figure out when exactly he'd fallen in love with her, Lucy was trying to determine if she loved Bickslow or not. Period. It was a lot harder than she'd expected too, because at least Bickslow had his team and his friends to basically spell it out for him. Lucy really only had Natsu at that time since their job would have them out of Magnolia until the start of December.

Natsu wasn't all too willing to help either. He still wasn't the biggest supporter of their relationship, but he knew that Bickslow made her happy, so that was all that kept him from tearing the guy's tongue out and setting it on fire. That being said, he was starting to warm up to the idea, especially after hearing Bickslow's accidental declaration.

When their job started wrapping up and Lucy actually had time to think, the whole 'love' conundrum was all that was in her brain. Now, Lucy was absolutely clueless when it came to the love, and she'd be the first to admit that. Much like Bickslow, she could wrap her head around dating because dating was easy, in comparison to love, that is. Love was scary. It was terrifying because to her, she saw it as completely giving your heart to someone and they'd have the power the shatter it in just a single heartbeat. That thought scared her.

It had gotten to the point though where she was so desperate for help with figuring it out that she'd gone to Erza on one of the quieter nights they'd had since they were tracking a bandit group to their location (and honestly, it was a mystery that they hadn't managed to get caught by that point). Erza had read enough romance novels to know the ins and outs of it. Well, that's what Lucy thought anyway.

So as she climbed into her tent with the Requip mage (the boys were on lookout for that night and were out of earshot, thankfully), she turned to her friend.

"Erza? Can I ask you something?" She said, biting on her lip.

"Of course." Erza replied, buttoning up her favourite pyjama tops.

"Well… you know how I've been seeing someone, right?"

Erza narrowed her eyes slightly at the Celestial Spirit mage, "They didn't hurt you, did they? Do I need to teach someone a lesson?"

"No, no!" Lucy said, a nervous chuckle escaping as she threw her hands up. "I just… You'll probably think it's silly but, I don't really know how I feel about them… and it's honestly been driving me insane." She whispered.

There was a moment of silence and Erza considered the blonde's words, and then, "I don't think it's silly," When Lucy sighed in relief, she continued, "I'm assuming you need help deciding if you love them or not, correct?" She asked quietly with a small smile.

Lucy nodded as she looked down. "It's embarrassing… I mean, I feel like I should know… I just… don't." She whispered.

"Love is a complicated thing. There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Now, tell me how they make you feel and I'll see if I can be of assistance." Erza said, patting the spot on the thin mattress next to her.

Lucy shifted around in the small tent to sit down next to Erza, and then when she got comfortable, she looked down at her hands between her folded legs. "I don't know where to begin. I mean… he makes me happy. It's hard not to be happy when I'm with him, I guess." She mumbled.

"What else?"

"Going out on jobs is really hard because most of the time, he's all that's on my mind, and how I'd rather be back in Magnolia just sitting on his lounge with him, reading a book or something." Lucy sighed as she picked at her nails, "I feel like everything is better when I'm with him, like everything that's wrong with the world doesn't matter anymore."

Erza was smiling softly as Lucy spoke. She didn't even have to say anything because Lucy just started rambling – listing all of the things that she loved and all of the things that drove her absolutely insane. The Requip mage sat and listened to every word, and as she did so, she realised that Lucy didn't need someone to help her decide where her feelings lay; she needed someone to listen. She already had all of the information there for her, she just needed to talk about it for her to realise it herself.

Because to Erza, whoever it was that Lucy was seeing, she loved them, and it was just a matter of Lucy being able to see it.

When Lucy finally realised she'd been rambling on for a good twenty minutes about Bickslow (making sure not to give too many details about who it was), she gasped and put her hands to her face, shaking her head slightly. "Oh God. I just kept talking and talking."

"It's fine," Erza chuckled. Then, when Lucy dropped her hands, she asked, "So, what do you think?"

Lucy gawked at her friend for a second, "That's what you were for!"

"You didn't need me. I think you had your answer right there all along. You just needed to say it out loud. So, what do you think?"

"I…" She furrowed her brow in confused as the words sunk in. Slowly, she replayed every single word she'd said back in her head, over and over again. Each time she did so, she began to understand what Erza had meant just a little bit more.

She was right – the answer had been there the entire time but she'd been ignoring it.

At some point, she'd crossed over from falling in love with Bickslow, to actually being in love with him. She didn't know when it had happened, but it had. At some point.

And whether she knew it or not, she was just as terrified as Bickslow was.

"Shit… you're right." She whispered. She was too busy staring at a small mark on the inside of the tent wall to care about the fact that Erza had just pulled her in for a hug – although honestly, she was a little glad that for once, it wasn't her armour had been smashed against. "I should have come to you sooner."

Hell, maybe if she'd gone to Erza sooner, she would have been able to tell her who it actually was.

 _No… Bickslow would be dead if that had happened, and there's no way I'd be able to deal with that._

* * *

When Lucy returned from her job a few days later, she didn't go to the guild and she didn't go back to her own house. She went straight for Bickslow's. She didn't care that it was eight o'clock in the morning and Bickslow wouldn't be awake, because they needed to have that conversation that they'd been putting off. Thanks to Erza, she'd realised that.

Bickslow looked up from his bowl of cereal as he sat at his dining table when his door opened. When he saw Lucy's face, he knew exactly what was going to happen, and for once, he wasn't smiling. He still wasn't ready for that conversation, but whether he wanted it to happen or not, it was happening.

"We need to talk about this." She said, pushing the door closed behind her.

"Yeah… probably…" Bickslow mumbled as he pushed his chair back and stood to carry his bowl over to the sink. _Yeah, no way I'm going to be eating now._

And then, there was an awkward silence as they stood on opposite sides of the room staring at each other, neither really wanting to be the one to start the dreaded conversation.

But Bickslow had always been good at breaking silences. Honestly, it was a bit of a gift.

"Did you just get back?" He asked.

Lucy sighed as she folded her arms. "Don't change the subject, Bicks."

He nodded once. "Right… yeah… so…" He mumbled. _Fuck me… this sucks._

After another moment of awkward silence, Lucy was the one to break it. "Did you mean it?" She asked quietly.

"It's… complicated." Or, in other words: 'Yes, I meant it, but I'm still not ready to actually say it again since I hadn't meant to say it in the first place.'

Lucy stared at the Seith mage from across the room, "It's _complicated_?! How is it complicated, Bickslow? It's a yes or no answer." She shouted.

Bickslow winced slightly as she yelled. He couldn't remember her ever yelling at him before. He'd seen her yell at Natsu and Gray, and he was beginning to see why they were so terrified of her. "It's not that simple…"

"I'm failing to see how it's anything but simple."

"Like I said, it's complicated!" It was Bickslow's turn to shout.

Lucy unfolded her arms with a single nod as she looked over the room slowly. "Well, Bickslow…" She said in a surprisingly calm manner, walking over to the door, "It's either you meant it, or you didn't."

And when Bickslow saw her hand rest on the door handle, he knew he only had a short amount of time to do anything about it. But… he couldn't. By that point, he'd gladly admit to anyone that knew about them that he was in love with her, but he couldn't admit it to her even though he wanted to. It was like even fibre of his being was stopping him from doing so. All he could do was stare as she slowly turned the handle.

Lucy could feel the tears threatening to spill as she pulled the door open slowly. "Well, when you figure out if you did or not, you know where to find me." And before Bickslow could even say or move a muscle, she'd slammed the door behind her again.

As she slid down the closed door to the ground, she heard something smash from inside his apartment and then the tears came. She refused to believe that that was the end, not after all of the time and effort they'd put in to get past their last… well, issue.

She knew Bickslow did stupid things, and Lucy just had to hope that this was the same thing – he was just having trouble coming to terms with his feelings, just like she had. Even though he hadn't said those three little worlds that any girl would love to hear, he'd basically said the same thing, so why would he say it if he didn't mean it? That's what Lucy didn't understand.

She just had to hope that he did mean it and that he just needed time to accept it, just like she had.

She had to hope that he'd realise it before she had to come true on her promise of walking away without looking back if he broke her heart, and at that point, it was only just being held together and she didn't know how long she could wait for Bickslow.

* * *

 **Ah, I'm sorry. Forgive me, my friends, hehe.**

 **I promise I'll get the next chapter up as soon as I can! I really need to start working on my some uni assignments (got one due in about 2 weeks) and because I missed a week of lectures and didn't really get much done at home, I need to catch up next week with the tutes and other lectures. With that being said, I'll probably have the chapter up in a few days/week or so at most.**

 **Please remember to review (if you can). I love all of your little comments, whether they're good or bad or whatever. I love 'em all.**

 **Anyway, time for me to go to bed because honestly, three chapters for two stories in one day has done my head in.**

 **\- April**


	28. Chapter 28

For the next three weeks, Bickslow was a mix of frustrated, angry, and miserable. Lucy and Bickslow hadn't said a single word to each other in those three weeks, and it was partly because they'd both been going out on jobs just to avoid each other more. Bickslow didn't know what was going on in terms of them still being together or not and that was what frustrated him. He was angry that he still couldn't admit to her that he loved her, and he was miserable because he missed her, even though she was literally right there.

But in those three weeks, Bickslow finally realised something that made him want to hit his head against a wall for being so stupid.

His idea of 'one day' – waking up one day to realise that he'd hopelessly and irrevocably fallen in love with her – was wrong, sort of. Of course, he'd wanted it to happen, and it did, so he'd been happy, but it was when it had happened – that's what he realised.

It hadn't taken him nearly four months to realise he'd been falling in love with her and completely missed it; it had taken him nearly four months to realise he'd been in love with her the entire time.

Of course, when he'd brought that up when they'd been sitting on the train on route to their last job, Ever had shrieked again and Laxus had given him a look as if to say 'I could have told you that.' Bickslow was beginning to think that he had been the only one who didn't realise how he'd felt the entire time. Well, apart from Lucy.

But the fact that he'd finally completely come to terms with it all was irrelevant, because he still couldn't say it, and even if he could, Lucy didn't want to talk to him.

When it comes to Bickslow not being able to say how he feels, it came down to something incredibly simple, and yet simultaneously stupid. For whatever reason, Bickslow saw finally saying those three little words as taking an incredibly big step towards an actual committed relationship. Now, that wasn't to say he wasn't ready for it, because he was, and hell, they were basically already there and it had been great. But somehow, the addition of love made everything more… real, almost.

Putting it simply, love scared the living hell out of him. He'd avoided it his entire life – up until Lucy, that is.

And that was one of the key things that got him closer to being able to say it – it was Lucy. She'd been there through everything, she trusted him, and deep down, Bickslow knew that she loved him just as much as he did her.

Because when he thought about Lucy, the entire love situation became a lot less scary. With Lucy, everything was always easy and everything would feel like it would be fine.

So by that point, the only things stopping him from actually saying those three little words were the facts that she really did not want to talk to him (as far as he saw, anyway), and Bickslow still had no idea what they were anymore.

Lucy, on the other hand… well, Lucy was honestly just mad at herself. She realised she'd gone about the entire situation the wrong way. She shouldn't have put it all on Bickslow and she was really finding it hard not to go up to him and apologise and just get back to the way things were. She missed him and his stupid jokes, but Lucy also wasn't going to back down.

She would stand her ground, even if it just about killed her. She was going to wait for Bickslow to finally be able to talk about whatever it is he feels for her, because, well… if they couldn't talk about it, then what was the chance of them going any further?

* * *

So that brought them up to Christmas. Laxus and the Raijinshuu were having dinner with the Strauss' (much to Laxus' dismay, or so he'd let everyone believe), and Lucy with her team at the guild.

And honestly, on that day, both Bickslow and Lucy had reached a new level of miserable that all of their friends could see. It just sucked that Christmas coincided with what would technically mark four months of dating for them, if either of them knew what exactly they were doing at that moment.

Bickslow pulled at the collar of his button-down shirt as he waited for Mira and Lisanna to bring out everything for dinner. The two had insisted that no one move a muscle – including Elfman who was busy being attacked with a paper fan.

He didn't want to be there, not in the slightest. He was so close to running out of the Strauss' house and going straight to the guild just to tell Lucy how he actually felt. He didn't care that the rest of her team would be there (along with the rest of the guild) and he didn't care that he'd probably end up dead. He'd had enough of being miserable. He missed being happy and every day he'd missed Lucy more and more.

"So, I have a bit of an announcement." Mira chimed as she placed the plates down in front of everyone with the help of Lisanna, then took a seat next to Laxus who looked just about ready to walk out.

Laxus glanced towards the Seith mage opposite him and then back to Mira. Much like the rest of his team, he knew exactly how Bickslow felt and he'd be lying if he said that what was going on between him and Lucy wasn't driving him insane. With that came the fact that Laxus knew his friend wasn't exactly going to take Mira's 'announcement' too well…

"Mira, maybe we shouldn't…" He whispered in the eldest Strauss' ear.

She turned to face the Dragon Slayer with an aghast look, "Nonsense! Now is a good a time as ever!" Then, back to everyone on the table who looked towards them eagerly, except Bickslow. "Well, Laxus and myself have been dating for quite some time now, and I thought it was time that we came out with it." She said with a smile.

"Laxus is a man!" Elfman cheered.

"We already knew." Lisanna and Evergreen both said with small smiles.

"C-congratulations…" Freed muttered.

Bickslow on the other hand, well… he'd been in a sour mood all day. "Absolutely fucking awesome." He muttered, lifting his wine glass in the air before gulping it all down, much to everyone's horror. _Everyone and their stupid happy couples._ He had an inability to care about the fact that Laxus of all people had been in a secret relationship, and by the sound of it, longer than Bickslow had been.

"Bicksl-?" Mira said quietly.

"Leave it." Laxus mumbled with a slight shake of his head. Because really, it was probably not a good idea to push it any further.

And dinner for the most part was in silence, just because of Bickslow and how uncomfortable he was making everyone. So as everyone had their quiet conversations around him, Bickslow just sulked, pushing around the food on his full plate that he just didn't want to touch while everyone else was already on to dessert.

But Mira being Mira, well… she didn't like that and she was going to change it.

"So, Bickslow… another year has passed, any more of a chance of you actually settling down one day?" She asked with a small smile. Every year she asked the same question and every year the answer was the same.

But not this year.

There was a moment of silence after Laxus, Evergreen, and Freed had all dropped their forks on their plates as they looked between the Seith mage and the Demon barmaid.

Bickslow continued staring down at his dinner plate for a few more moments, not really caring that everyone's eyes were on him.

Then, as he dropped his own fork, he pushed his chair back and stood up slowly. "I can't do this anymore." He whispered. He was done. He couldn't wait any longer. He was either going to do it then or not do it at all, and if he didn't do it, he was going to have even less of a chance of getting Lucy back. He'd waited too long as it was.

They all stared as he walked out of the dining room and then the space he'd been as the front door slammed shut with his departure. It only took another minute for the rest of the Raijinshuu to realise what he'd meant.

"Oh shit. He's gonna get himself killed." Laxus muttered and they all scrambled up from their chairs as they said their rushed apologies and headed for the door.

And after a few glances at each other, the Strauss' soon followed, because after all, they had no idea what had just happened and they wanted to know.

* * *

Christmas at the guild was just an excuse for everyone to get more drunk than usual. Lucy, however, really had no interest in drinking, not when she realised it was going to make everything hurt even more.

It had nearly been a month since she'd last spoken to Bickslow and she was starting to think that his silence was his answer.

But she still had a little bit of hope left that what he'd said, he'd meant. Just because she wanted to hear Bickslow say those three words, so she could say them back and believe that everything would go back to the way it was and she'd be happy again. She knew she should have said it when she'd had the chance three weeks earlier, but she'd been too scared. She just wanted him to say it first.

Lucy honestly did love Bickslow, and even though it was a bit of a revelation to admit that to herself, she wanted to be with him. Moreover, Bickslow had always been full of surprises, and she wanted him to surprise her one more time before she lost the last bit of her hope.

It was all she wanted.

But it was Christmas, and Lucy was trying her best to be in a good mood, so she sat with her friends and watched them make fools of themselves. Cana was in the middle of a drinking game with the master and Macao; Gray and Natsu were in an eating contest for whatever reason, and Erza was – for once – eating her cake without any disturbances. Everyone was having a good time, and that's what mattered.

"He's an idiot, Lu." Levy had said with a small smile as Gajeel walked up with her on his shoulders.

"Damn straight he is." Gajeel muttered under his breath. By that point, the two were aware of what had really happened between Lucy and Bickslow and they remained the only two to know. As far as everyone else was concerned, they were just avoiding each other for the sake of it because Bickslow refused to actually talk about what had happened. Gajeel had only found out because Lucy had told Levy, and even though Bickslow was one of his best friends, he wasn't going to start meddling, even though he really wanted to because the two were hopeless.

Lucy sighed as an airy chuckle escaped, "Yeah, he is," But he's an idiot that she fell in love with nonetheless. "Anyway, I might go see if Kinana needs any help, I'll see you around, guys." She said with a small smile and turned for the bar, not noticing the concerning look that the Dragon Slayer and Script mage gave each other as she made her way through the guild.

"You know we can't get involved, Gajeel."

"I know, Shrimp."

* * *

When Bickslow saw the guild doors in sight, he started jogging towards them. He was vaguely aware he'd had six people following him the entire time, but he didn't care. The only thing he cared about was Lucy and finally telling her how he felt.

As he pushed the large doors open, he paused, just for a second, as he scoured over the guild, looking for the familiar blonde hair. And then he saw her, walking through the sea of people and towards the bar.

He didn't even bother with the small steps, just jumping over them all as he pushed past people who were in his way, ignoring their complaints as he did so. None of it mattered. He just needed to get to her.

There was a tap on Natsu's shoulder. "What is it?" He said around the mouthful of food, barely turning his head to see who it was.

"He's gonna tell her." Came Laxus' mumbled response that only Natsu could hear.

And for a second, Natsu didn't know what he meant. That was, until he turned to look at what Laxus was staring at, and as soon as he saw Bickslow practically running across the guild and towards Lucy with a determined look to him, he swallowed everything that was in his mouth. "Oh shit." He cried before turning back to face Gray to see if he'd paid attention to any of it, and thankfully, he was still busy with his face in a bowl of pasta.

Although Natsu didn't know how Lucy felt, he knew how Bickslow felt and he knew that Erza was their biggest problem, and honestly, it wasn't hard to figure out that whatever was about to happen was probably going to end with Bickslow's death – it was up to those who already knew about them to stop Erza from killing the guy.

So as the Dragon Slayers went back to silently observing, they moved around quietly, making sure they were close enough to Erza or Gray or anyone else who would completely flip out. Natsu could deal with Gray, should he decide to lose his cool, and Laxus and Gajeel would have to deal with Erza, should she look up from her cake.

And not too far away, Bickslow was finally standing in front of Lucy. In a split second, he was standing just a few inches from her with her face in his hands, staring down at the face he'd missed so much in the last three weeks.

Before she could even form a word, he ducked down to press his lips to hers. As soon as he did so, she forgot about all of the people around them who were no doubt staring at them. Nothing else mattered.

Bickslow pulled away after only a short moment, only because he wasn't there to kiss her (not that he didn't want to, because he did – a lot). He could feel his heart beating a million miles an hour in his chest and how his throat was suddenly dry, but he didn't care. He needed to say it.

"I love you, Cosplayer." He whispered.

Her breath caught as the tears instantly welled in her eyes, but they weren't because she was sad. She was happy – she was feeling more joy than she'd ever thought possible. _He said it._ _He said it and he meant it._ And she could see it on his face. Whether or not he'd meant it before, he'd meant it _then_ , and that was all Lucy wanted.

She stood on her toes to reach up, her hands going to the side of his face as his dropped to her waist and she pulled him back down just so she could kiss him again. When she opened her mouth slightly, his tongue slipped past her lips to caress her own. She'd missed that, and she'd missed Bickslow.

Was she crying in the middle of the guild? Yes. Was she making out with Bickslow in the middle of the guild? Also yes. Did she care about any of it? Nope. Not one bit. Because she was in love with Bickslow. She didn't even care that Erza was in the room.

And when Lucy pulled back to wipe the tears from her face, she looked up with a smile that made Bickslow's heart absolutely melt. "I love you too." She whispered.

It was only when Erza noticed how silent it had gotten did she stand up and leave her cake on the table to see just what everyone had been staring at.

She instantly dropped her fork. There was a part of her that wanted to run all 200 of her swords through the Seith mage, but there was also a part of her that was putting all of the pieces together and was stopping herself from doing so.

Bickslow was the one Lucy had been talking about. Bickslow was the one that made her happy and made her feel like everything was fine. Bickslow was the one she was in love with and needed help figuring it out.

It had always been Bickslow.

Now, that wasn't to say that she still didn't want to run every single sword she owned through him, because she did, just not as much as she usually did. She would hold herself back, for now.

"I'm not gonna have to pin you to the ground, am I?" Laxus said as he folded his arms across his chest, coming to stand next to the Requip mage.

She turned to look at the blonde Dragon Slayer who was watching her carefully, and then she looked around slowly. Natsu and Happy were holding Gray back as he tried to figure what the hell was going on while glancing over in her direction. Gajeel and Levy were standing just on her other side, with the other two members of the Raijinshuu just behind them.

She narrowed her eyes when she realised that they were all watching _her_.

"You all knew?" She mumbled, folding her arms across her chest.

Natsu shrugged as he pulled Gray towards her, "Sorry, Erza. Sworn to secrecy."

"No wonder why…" Gray muttered as he pulled himself free from the Dragon Slayer and Exceed. Because really, it wasn't hard to figure out that they were worried about Erza's possible wrath, and they had a good reason to. She was a monster, honestly.

Erza sighed as she took a step forward, unfolding her arms, yet within a single step, she was on the floor as all three of the Dragon Slayers around her piled on top of her – as a precaution, of course.

"Get off me, you morons!" She yelled with her face pressed into the floor. Suddenly, all of the attention had been drawn from the couple in the middle of the guild to the pile of mages on the ground. Even Bickslow and Lucy were staring at them.

* * *

As soon as they'd roused Mira after she'd squealed and passed out (and she woke up with hearts in her eyes, no less), Bickslow and Lucy were sent to sit at the bar as the entire guild stared at them, most with eyebrows raised or slightly agape mouths.

The entire guild was confused and surprised. Mainly confused because the last time Bickslow had kissed anyone (also Lucy) in the guild, it had been passed off as a challenge. Surprised, on the other hand… well, that was partly because Lucy kissed him back that time and then there was the issue that a few people had heard Bickslow just say he loved the girl, and that was definitely a shock considering Bickslow didn't date.

"Is this really necessary…?" Bickslow mumbled as he shifted uncomfortably on the stool. He was usually fine with being in the spotlight, but this was something else.

"Yes." Came the guild's united response.

"Why?" He groaned as he dropped his face to his hands. _Why couldn't anything be simple?_

And just like that, almost everyone in the guild decided to talk, apparently they all had something to say about it.

"Because it's weird."

"When the hell did this even start?!"

"I for one think it's kinda cute…"

"Are you insane?"

"Hey! Lucy finally got a boyfriend!" Cana shouted from somewhere.

Lucy looked down more as her face went a bright. _Trust Cana to blurt out the obvious._

Suddenly, Makarov had hopped onto the bar between Bickslow and Lucy with his hands up. "Alright you brats, how about you shut up and let _them_ talk." He yelled over everything, instantly putting the room into silence.

When Bickslow looked around the room slowly, he realised that the fair majority were staring at him rather than Lucy – including his friends… and Erza and Gray. "What the fuck are you all staring at me for?"

Gajeel scoffed from where he stood with Levy on his shoulders again, "'Cause we're waitin' for you to talk."

"What the hell do you want me to say, then?!" Bickslow shouted back. And then, when everyone started whispering amongst themselves, he turned to face Lucy. "Would you get mad if I just got on the babies and left?" He mumbled.

"Yes." There was no way she was going to be stuck with a few hundred people who were trying to squeeze every detail about her relationship out of her.

Bickslow sighed as he leant back on the stool, rubbing a hand through his hair before resting his elbows on the bar. "Alright, lay it on me. I'll take whatever you fuckers throw at me. No secrets." _Because I'm so done with the whole 'not talking' thing._

And just like that, a million different questions were shouted at the two.

"You two? Really?!"

"Yes," Lucy replied with a slight smile.

"How long?"

"Four months, like, to the day." Bickslow replied.

"You kept this a secret for four fucking months?!"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"…Didn't really feel like dying." He mumbled.

"Hey!" Erza shouted.

And on and on the questions went – ranging to ridiculously irrelevant to incredibly personal and honestly, Bickslow had to draw the line somewhere, especially when Lucy decided to take all of the 'easy' questions, leaving him with the stupid ones.

But Bickslow was beginning to get a headache from all of the questions directed at himself and Lucy. There were places he'd rather be and people he'd rather be with, and strangely enough, the guild and with a hundred people he mostly hated was not one of them.

He stood up from where he sat, his fingertips rubbing circles on his temples. "Alright, alright!" He shouted over them all, and they all stopped, for the most part. "You're all giving me a headache. Let's summarise, shall we?"

"Uh… Bickslow…" Lucy mumbled, though it went unheard. She had no idea what Bickslow was doing, and honestly, she was a little worried.

"Firstly, yes, we've been dating for the last four months and yes we kept it hidden from most of you because you all have a tendency to overreact to shit like this," A few whispers and nods were heard and seen around the room as Bickslow looked over to Erza who was eternally scowling at him, "and Erza, you didn't know because I'm honestly fucking terrified of you and I didn't want to die – and I still don't."

"You would be dead if it weren't for Lucy." The Requip mage grumbled as she folded her arms.

Bickslow gestured to her while looking over the guild, "You see my point?" Then, he looked over to where Cana was sitting on another stool. "Secondly, Cana, this is seriously all your doing, because if your cards hadn't put us on that job months ago then I wouldn't be standing here saying any of this, so thank you."

"Damn right it is!" She hollered.

"And thirdly," He gestured to Lucy who was still staring at him incredulously. "Yes, I am fucking in love with Lucy fucking Heartfilia and if any of you have a problem with that then you can go to Hell, 'cause I don't care what any of you think."

"He lllllloves her!"

And Bickslow meant every single of what he'd said. Sure, when he'd come to the guild that night, he hadn't really intended to be standing there and saying any of that, but… it was a small price to pay, really. He'd said what he needed to say to Lucy and that's all that mattered.

So as Gajeel and Levy's snickers could be heard over the slight whispers between the crowd, he turned back to Lucy. "Can we go now?" He mumbled.

Lucy grinned as she hopped up from the stool before lacing her arm around his elbow and looking up, "Yes, yes we can." She said as she giggled slightly.

"Thank God." Bickslow said with his own chuckle as they walked through the guild and towards the door without a single care in the world. By that point, no one else's opinion mattered to them because they had each other again and really, that was all that they needed.

Telling Erza, Gray, and the rest of the guild were the last steps they'd had to take, and now that they'd done all of that they felt like a great weight had been lifted off their shoulders. Everyone knew and they could finally be free and be together without worrying about anyone else.

They could move forward, finally.

So as they all watched the couple walk through the doors and out into the dark streets of Magnolia, Erza narrowed her eyes at the slowly closing door. "Wait, where are they going now?" She mumbled.

Levy giggled as Gajeel put her back down to sit on a table. "Probably best you don't question that…"

And then all of the colour dropped from her face as she stared at the door in horror. "N-" She'd started for the door, and with a quick glance to each other, Laxus and Gajeel had tackled her to the ground again.

* * *

 **It only took 28 chapters, but... you know... it happened, eventually. LOL.**

SwiftDragonfly - I know it got repetitive in the last chapters and I apologise, but I needed to wrap it up in this chapter and honestly, the entire thing was kind of supposed to be confusing. The thing with Bickslow was that up until this chapter, he wasn't ready to really admit it. When the whole 'one day' thing started (can't remember the chapter), I wrote how he never really believed in the whole 'love' thing until her, so when he finally realised that he did love Lucy, it scared the hell out of him because it had kind of come out of nowhere (to him, anyway). Long story short, he's useless, and so is Lucy. I never really considered the whole backgrounds things and their definitions for it, so that was really enlightening.

In regards to the whole babies/souls/spirits thing, the plan was to always make the connection between Souls-Spirits, just because I do agree that they are kind of similar (it's also why this fic is called _Souls and Spirits_ in the first place), but I just never got around to it. I will put it in eventually though! Probably in the next few chapters.

 **As usual, thank you guys for the reviews and I hope it was okay. I know it was a little messy and rushed in parts.  
Also, I'm not going to say when the next chapter will be up. It will happen when it happens, LOL. **

**Until next time.**

 **\- April**


	29. Chapter 29

**Thank you guys for the lovely reviews on the last chapter. Always make my day.**

 **Lil' bit of citrus in this one. I apologise in advance for cringe-worthiness of it (I'm still learning how to write this shit), but honestly, I'm going to have a hard time keeping it, well... 'decent', if you get what I mean. I don't even know anymore.**

* * *

"Oh… fuck… Lucy…" Bickslow said in a long moan as he pulled the blonde down one final time, his head going back before he fell back down to the bed and pulled her down with him before he shuddered slightly, filling her as the muscles gripped him tightly, her core pulling every last bit from him.

Lucy rested her head on his shoulder as his hand smoothed down her sides and to her thigh, and up again. "That was…" She whispered, breathing heavily still.

"…amazing." He finished. _Always amazing._

"Well, I actually didn't have a word for it… but amazing works."

Bickslow chuckled slightly before tilting his head to kiss the top of her head, "Always amazing with me."

A breathless laugh escaped her throat as she finally rolled off of him and onto her side next to him, pulling the sheet up as she went. "I'll take your word for it."

A moment of silence in the room with the only sounds being the sounds of their heavy breathing, trying to catch their breath again, as usual.

Bickslow pulled himself free from the way Lucy had tangled herself up with him – something he didn't mind – and sat up from the bed, pulling on a pair of boxer briefs as he stood, "Still before midnight?" He asked over his shoulder.

Lucy rolled on the bed, reaching out for her key pouch on one of the nightstands. Her fingers ghosted over each of them until she touched Horologium's key, a small smile on her face as she rolled back to the way she was. "11:55PM." She said.

"Good." Bickslow said before he ducked out of the room, walking past the kitchen and over to the living room. "Now… where did I put it?" He muttered as he walked over the desk in the corner, lifting up papers and books until he found the grey rectangular box.

When he got back, Lucy was just coming out of the bathroom, already with the grey and pink guild shirt on again. Bickslow's hand caught her waist and wrapped around, pinning her to him as he lifted the small box from behind his back and handed it to her with a wide grin. "Merry Christmas."

"Huh? What?" She mumbled, looking down at the box in her hands and back up to Bickslow as his other hand dropped to her waist as well. "What is it?"

"Open it and find out."

So with one final sceptical glance towards Bickslow, she looked back down the box and lifted the lid up. "Oh, Bicks…" Lucy choked out as her breath caught slightly. In the box was a small 8-pointed star pendant inlaid with diamonds on a silver chain. "I-it's beautiful… When did you…?"

"I went on a job a few weeks ago when you were out on one. Saw it and couldn't help myself." Bickslow chuckled as he took the box from her hands slowly before lifting up the chain as she turned around. "I was actually going to give it to you when you got back at the start of the month… but yeah… stuff happened…" He mumbled, clasping the chain at the back of her neck as she held her hair out of the way.

Lucy turned again, walking over to sit on the edge of the bed as she began to wring her hands together, staring down at them. "I'm sorry for that… I really am…" She whispered. "Every day I just wanted to come and apologise for it… but I was stubborn and I… I just wanted you to say it first." Because she was too scared to say it first, even though every day she knew that she should have just gotten over her fear and said it before any of it had started.

"It's fine, really," Bickslow said quietly, sitting down on the bed next to her as his arms wrapped around her to pull her close. "And uh… you said it first, anyway…" He said with a light chuckle.

"What?"

"Remember when you were sick and I came over?" When she nodded into his chest, he continued, "Well, when I was sitting on the bed you whispered 'I love you' when you were half asleep… or asleep completely. I never found out."

Lucy groaned into his chest as he chuckled again. "Oh God… that's embarrassing. So basically, my mind knew and _you_ knew that I loved you before I actually realised it?"

"If it makes you feel any better, everyone knew I was in love with you before I realised it." _And they knew about you too, but I won't bring that up._

"We're hopeless." She muttered.

"Yeah, we are," Bickslow whispered with a small smirk as he leant back on the bed again, propping his head up with his elbow on the mattress as Lucy rolled onto her side. "I do love you, though," He whispered before leaning over to press his lips to hers softly. "I was in love with you the entire time."

Lucy gasped quietly before a small smile graced her lips as she propped herself up on her own elbow. "The entire time?"

"The entire time."

It was Lucy's turn to move forward to kiss Bickslow, rolling him onto his back as her hands cupped his face. "I love you, Bicks." She whispered.

"Best. Christmas. Ever." Bickslow said with a wide grin before pulling her back down, his arms lacing around the back of her waist, and his lips found hers yet again.

* * *

Bickslow was awoken by something cold pressed against his back – which he realised where Lucy's feet - and instinctively he arched away from it as he grabbed another pillow and put it over his head.

"Come on," Lucy giggled, pressing her feet into his back more. "You promised you'd get up early to come to the guild."

"Promises after 2AM don't count." He mumbled into one of the pillows.

"Why not?" She said with a pout as she drew her feet back and resting her head on one of the other pillows.

"Because I'm either drunk, hung-over, or too tired to remember what I agree to in the morning.

Another giggle from the blonde as her hand reached out, trailing a finger down the back of his neck that made him shiver slightly, "And why is that?" She asked slowly.

He lifted up the pillow and tossed it to the end of the bed before rolling to his other side, his arm instantly going over the side of Lucy's waist before moving to lean on top of her slightly. "Hmm… what were the words my neighbour used again?" Bickslow mumbled with a small smirk as his lips trailed over her jaw.

"I think it was something along the lines of, 'stop fucking her brains out and go to bed.'" She mumbled.

"So am I drunk, hung-over, or exhausted?" He murmured between each kiss, trailing down her neck and to her shoulder.

"…Exhausted?"

"Correct."

Lucy rolled out from under him with a smirk on her face before padding over to the bathroom door, looking over her shoulder, "Well, in that case… maybe you should just stay in bed."

Bickslow fell back to the bed as she closed the door behind her and he heard his shower start. He stared up at the ceiling for a few minutes as he lay tangled in the sheets, deciding if he was really _that_ exhausted. Sure, they'd ended up staying up til just after 2AM, and as Lucy had put it when she'd climbed on top of him for the second time in a few hours, and then the third time, they were just making up for the last three weeks. And really, Bickslow was totally fine with that. Unexpected, but fine.

He reached out to pick up the small alarm clock that sat on his nightstand and he all but groaned when he saw that it was only a little past 7AM. _Mornings fucking suck_ , he thought. But… Lucy was in the shower. He'd definitely find energy for that.

Lucy was rinsing out her hair in the hot water when she finally heard the door to the bathroom open, letting some of the steam that had formed out of the room. "And here I was thinking you'd rather go back to sleep."

"Never." Bickslow murmured, stepping into the shower and under the water as his hands went to her waist, backing her into the tiled wall slowly before claiming her mouth. He let out a moan as her hand wrapped around his member, stroking up and down slowly. "Oh, Jesus…" He murmured, having no choice but to pull his head back from the kiss.

With another small smirk, Lucy pushed him back into the tiled wall, all while slowly lowered herself to kneel on the wet floor, feeling the hot water run down her back.

Bickslow could only look down in shock the entire time. He suddenly had a reason to like mornings. When she ran her tongue along the underside, from the base to the tip, he couldn't help but throw his head back into the wall, ignoring the pain that followed from doing so.

Slowly, she swirled her tongue around the head as her hand continued working along the length. Up. Down. Up. Over and over, rotating her wrist each time. "Oh, God," Bickslow moaned, desperately searching for something to hold on to until his arm went up, his hand wrapping around the curtain rod. "Fuck… me…" He muttered when her mouth finally closed around him.

Now, up until that point, she'd only been so bold (by Lucy's standards, that is) to do that once, and honestly, Bickslow was having a hard time with believing that even though he'd seen it with his own eyes – both times.

"Later." She mumbled around him, the vibrations causing him to moan with a light shudder.

It was taking Bickslow all he had to keep himself standing, but the wall and the curtain rod were doing a great job with helping him do so. He watched as her lips met her hand over and over. When her tongue swirled around the tip again he couldn't help but fist his free hand in her wet hair. _Jesus. Fucking. Christ._

Each moan she made would send vibrations right through him, and each time he'd moan her name. Over. And. Over. Lucy suppressed her shivers when the hot water running down her back ran icy cold, instead focusing on that which was in front of her.

"Shit… please…" Bickslow mumbled, swallowing hard when Lucy once again looked up to meet his gaze with her own lecherous one, never stopping what she was doing. He slowly began to lightly thrust his hips, or was it he was guiding her head down each time? He honestly had no idea – he'd stopped thinking by that point. Whether he'd be able to was a different issue. Lucy was giving him head and that's all that mattered, really.

Another moan as her tongue flattened out on the underside and slowly, she quickened the pace of her hand, closing her eyes when he moaned her name over and over.

His breathing was shallow and he could feel the curtain rod slowly starting the give the tighter his grip got on it. Her hands, her mouth, her tongue. Bickslow was in absolute heaven, he thought, anyway. "Fuck… Lucy." He rasped, and with one final thrust, hitting the back of her throat inadvertently before pulling back slightly, he came, spilling himself down her throat.

She jumped slightly when there was a loud clang, only to look up in time to see the curtain rod falling to the ground with the curtain and all. Her hand continued stroking the twitching member slowly as her mouth stayed firmly around him, swallowing every last drop – something that Bickslow was only too shocked to even comment on.

When Bickslow finally let go of her hair, his hand falling limply to his side like the other had done, she stood up slowly, stepping up onto her tip-toes to kiss his lips briefly with a small smirk.

As she stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel from the rack, Bickslow slid down the tiled wall to sit in a heap in the corner of the shower. He was too busy watching the blonde walk away and into his bedroom for him to register that the water that was still running was absolutely fucking freezing.

And then he noticed the missing shower curtain before realising that it was now on the floor just by the shower and he couldn't help but chuckle. "Jesus, Cosplayer." He muttered under his breath before staring up at the shower head, slowly becoming aware of just how cold he was.

* * *

"Are you sure we can't just stay in bed the rest of the day?" Bickslow mumbled as they walked up to the guild doors.

"Positive," She scoffed, dragging him by the hand when he stood his ground, "I promise you're not going to die. You'd be dead already if that were the case."

"You're not helping. Erza is fucking terrifying. Do you remember what she did when I _kissed_ you? I still have a goddamn scar from that!" He said as he lifted up his hand to show the faint line across his hand.

"Bickslow, we're doing this – _together_. You're not feeding me to the wolves after last night, you got that?"

The Seith mage could only be glad that he was wearing visor, because if she'd seen him roll his eyes at that, then he'd be more scared of _her_ than Erza. So with a final sigh, he finally let the blonde pull him into the guild, only just catching her smug grin as she turned back around.

They'd only taken a single step and crossed through the doors when everything went silent as all eyes went to them. Lucy was sure she heard someone scream from a few streets over it was that quiet. As her eyes slowly went over the guild, she saw Mira, Cana, and Levy share a look before they all shot up from where they stood or sat and rushed over to where they stood.

When Lucy tried to turn and head back out the doors that had only just closed behind them, Bickslow moved to stand behind her, his hands just below her shoulders. "This was your idea, remember?" He said, leaning down to her ear. When the three finally got close enough, he pushed Lucy forward enough. He was literally offering his girlfriend to the wolves. "Have fun!" He said with his signature tongue-lolling grin.

"Bickslow, you…" Lucy muttered as she glared at the grinning Seith mage, her 'friends' pulling her across the guild and no doubt to the baths as more than half of the women in the guild got up and followed them.

It was only then did Bickslow notice the chilling gazes that more than half of the males that were stuck in the hall were giving him. Turns out, there were just as many male wolves as females in Fairy Tail.

With a gulp, he turned and tried to push the doors open and run away from what he knew was going to happen, only to have that all too familiar pain run through his spine before falling to the ground. "LAXUS!" He shouted with his face pressed into the ground. _God fucking damn it._

* * *

Lucy didn't think she'd ever seen so many people in the baths before. The bath itself was practically overflowing with bodies and then the surrounding area had just as many. She knew the questions were going to get uncomfortable but she knew there was nothing she could do about it. Her friends would make sure of it.

So slowly, she padded into the bathhouse with her towel wrapped firmly around her, trying to keep it on as long as possible _._ Cana had other plans though, and as soon as she sat down on the edge where they'd all kept a space for her, the brunette reached up to pull the towel from the blonde, throwing it towards the other side of the room.

Lucy squealed as she tried to sink down into the water, only to have small hands wrap around each of her arms to keep her out of the water as the room burst into a fit of giggles.

"Holy shit, Lucy!" Cana said, placing her bottle on the edge of the bath as she pointed out every single mark and hickey on the blonde – that she could see, anyway. "Bickslow went to town on you!" And he had, really. Her neck, breasts, abdomen, and even the inside of her thighs. Lucy had hoped that she'd be able to hide most of them for a while, but no, that just didn't work out.

"Guess we know what you did last night." Mira said with a giggle as Lucy finally slid down in the bath, bringing her knees up and folding her arms across her chest under the water, not even trying to hide the fact that her face felt as hot as the water just from her blush.

"So… what's dating Bickslow actually like?" Cana slurred, sidling up to Lucy.

"Yeah!" Lisanna added, "It's gotta be weird, right?"

"Well, I mean… it's great, you know?" Lucy said with her own great big smile. She wouldn't have been able to stop that happening if she tried, because it really was great. "He's really sweet and caring, and he's ridiculous and honestly sometimes, a bigger idiot than Natsu-"

"Find that hard to believe." Someone scoffed, followed by quiet giggles around the room.

"-but he makes me laugh, a lot. And smile. And Ridiculously happy."

"Aww," Was heard around the room as Lucy looked down, actually trying to hide her blush. "You're so cute together." Levy finished.

"You've only seen them like once and it was last night!" Cana said.

Lucy shook her head, "Nope. We went on a double date a while back. Levy and Gajeel are like the only two to actually see us together…" She shrugged when everyone stared between the Celestial Spirit mage and Script mage in shock. "Sorry." Lucy muttered with a slight giggle.

"Pfft, whatever," Cana slurred, then, turning to the blonde again, she leant in closer, "What about the sex though? That's gotta be _great_."

"I… that's… it's… Cana!" She spluttered, causing everyone to burst into a fit of giggles again.

"The tongue?" Cana said, waggling her eyebrows.

As everyone stared at her expectantly, Lucy cracked. She'd be lying if she said it didn't feel good to finally talk about her relationship with Bickslow, because honestly, she'd been waiting four months and she only really had Levy to talk to about any of it. Sure, Levy already pretty much knew the ins and outs of her sex life, but the guild didn't. And besides, not stays a secret in that guild forever.

But hey, she was dating Bickslow, after all. The guy had a reputation, and honestly, he really did live up to it.

"Oh God, the tongue." Lucy sighed before bursting out into her own uncontrollable giggles with everyone again.

* * *

Much like Lucy, Bickslow had been dragged to the baths too, and honestly, he was a little uncomfortable with the fact that Erza was in the corner of the bath itself and glaring at him. Hell, uncomfortable would be putting it lightly. Half of the guys in there were just glad they weren't bleeding from their noses – after all, it was Erza.

He sat on the edge of the bath with the towel wrapped low on his hips and his legs in the water, and honestly, it was starting to burn. Natsu was down one end, trying to raise the temperature as the males around him all had sweat dripping freely from every millimetre of skin, while Gray down the other end was trying to drop it a few degrees as the males down his end were shivering with their teeth chattering as the Ice Make mage and Dragon Slayer were in a constant battle. He'd chosen the wrong side, honestly.

"Holy shit, Lucy! Bickslow went to town on you!" Was heard from above and everyone – for the most part – shut the hell up and got ready to listen.

A few hands were offered to Bickslow to high-five, and obviously, he was going to oblige, because really, he did go to town.

Bickslow looked down at the bowl of popcorn that someone had passed him before narrowing his eyes at the bunch. "What the fuck, guys? Really?! Popcorn?"

There were a few shrugs and 'why nots?' before Gajeel yanked the bowl from him with his own shrug and threw a handful into his mouth, sliding down into the bath just next to where Bickslow sat. "Shut up." He muttered around the popcorn.

"Guess we know what you did last night."

A few chuckles around the room – Bickslow included, though he instantly stopped when he saw Erza narrowing her eyes at him from across the bath. _Nope, nope, nope._ He cleared his throat as he looked down at his nails, examining his own recently fixed manicure that Lucy had given him hell for before they'd gone to the guild.

"So… what's dating Bickslow actually like?"

"Yeah, it's gotta be weird, right?"

It was only as Lucy's answer travelled through the floor did Erza's glare lessen. Laxus just about choked when she'd called him as idiotic as Natsu, though of course, Natsu wasn't really listening. Either that or he didn't care too much.

"How the fuck did you get Lucy Heartfilia, dude?" Someone asked.

With a grin and a shrug, Bickslow leant back on his hands. "I have no idea." And he really did have no idea. It had been an eternal mystery as to how it had happened, but hell, was he glad about it all. Whatever it was he'd done to get her to like him – no, love him – was something that would probably always remain to be a mystery to Bickslow.

"She so tamed you." Wakaba muttered as Macao nodded in agreement.

"What? She did not!" Bickslow responded, sitting back up as everyone else agreed with their own nods and chuckles _. I am not someone who can be tamed._

"She fuckin' tamed you, dude," Gajeel muttered. "Like she tamed Salamander and the Ice Princess."

"She really did." Gray mumbled as he focused on pushing his ice further down the bath, slowly causing more people to huddle over to Natsu's side.

Now, Gray's reaction to the entire relationship thing was one that confused Bickslow right to that very moment. He'd expected the guy to flip out like Natsu had done when he'd found out, but from what Bickslow saw, he just didn't seem to care. Bickslow really didn't know whether or not to be happy or worried about that, because Gray was the only one who hadn't lost his cool – not yet, anyway.

In reality, Gray just didn't care all that much. Natsu and Happy had let a few things slip here and there before muttering and trying to cover it up and it didn't take Gray very long to put two and two together. He'd heard a few rumours here and there about Bickslow possibly seeing someone – a blonde, as it turns out – before they'd been squashed, and he knew that Lucy was seeing someone. Sure, he wasn't exactly the best of friends with the Seith mage, but he could also see that he made Lucy happy, especially after the previous night's events, so he had no reason to freak out like Erza had, and like he probably should have.

He wasn't going to meddle in someone else's life when he really had no place to do so – not unless the guy hurt Lucy, and honestly, Bickslow already had a line of people waiting to hurt him should he ever do so. That, and if he got involved, he'd have a certain blue-haired mage on his back and getting on his nerve, and those days, he was trying his best not to give Juvia a reason to do that.

"What about the sex though? That's gotta be great."

They all turned back to Bickslow and his smug tongue-lolling grin as Lucy spluttered. A few more high-fives and as the popcorn bowl got passed around, he could only turn to avoid the look that Erza was giving him. He was pretty sure he could feel her boring holes into the side of his head and scorching his hair in the process.

But when Lucy's voice travelled down to the male bathhouse again, Bickslow couldn't help but choke on his, well… tongue.

"Oh God, the tongue."

Even Gajeel had choked on the popcorn that had made his way back over to him and Laxus could only shake his head as a fair few of the faces in the bath turned as red as Erza's hair.

Bickslow could only grin with the topic of the women's conversation hanging from his mouth as he usually had it. Ah, yes. His tongue – something he was quite proud of, and honestly had played a small part in choosing the location of his guild mark. Lucy didn't know that detail though since he'd refused to tell her that part, but that didn't matter, obviously.

So when Erza sunk down into the bath up to her ears with her own embarrassment at the conversation choice, Bickslow chuckled as he leant back on his hands again before looking up to the ceiling, ready to continue to listen to what else his girlfriend had to say about that tongue of his.

* * *

 **Honestly, I may or may not have been drinking when writing this chapter, so if there's any errors I've missed, I apologise.**

 **If I upload a chapter in the next few days, I need someone to message me with 'GO DO YOUR UNIVERSITY ASSIGNMENTS, APRIL!' Like, for real, LOL.**

 **Hope it was okay and not cringe-worthy. Time for me to get out of bed (finally over being sick, lol) and go back to uni (and by that, I mean sitting in my health science lecture and reading the new FT chapter when it comes out, and that usually involves me sitting up the back of the lecture theatre trying to contain my excitement when I read them, and honestly, CH 447 made me want to scream with the feels. MY BABIES).**

 **ANYWAY... Time to go.**

 **\- April**


	30. Chapter 30

**Thirty chapters, jeez, lol. I feel like I should be ending it around this point, but that's not going to happen. I'm nowhere near doing that. :D That being said, my chapters are also fairly short.**

 **Thank you all for the reviews as usual (Kura JIO again, honestly, your reviews are amazing. Yours too, CelticHeart13, and no, I don't think I did drink enough LOL).**

 **Still procrastinating and EBP in nursing is an absolute bitch to read about. If I read one more article on vaccinations I might lose my mind.**

 **Anyway, enjoy!**

* * *

Slowly, everyone got used to the fact that Lucy was dating Bickslow and Bickslow was actually dating someone in general. For the most part, everything was the same as it usually was – Lucy would usually sit with her team and shake her head at Natsu and Gray's antics and Bickslow would mostly sit with Laxus and the Raijinshuu or Gajeel and Levy (if they decided to sit at separate tables, which by that point was a rare occurrence).

Erza was still sending pointed glares towards Bickslow which no one could do anything about and Mira had stopped fainting whenever she saw the 'new' couple together.

On this particular day, however, Lucy was in fact sitting with Bickslow and the rest of his team, and not to mention Gajeel and Levy. The table was a little crowded.

"And here you all go!" Mira said cheerfully as she placed the new drinks on the table in front of everyone before smiling at Laxus. The guy actually smiled back – well, it was a smile by Laxus' standards.

It was at that point Bickslow choked on the drink he'd just picked up because he remembered just what the Demon and Dragon Slayer had announced a few weeks earlier over Christmas dinner. With a wide grin, he quickly looked between the two. "Holy shit! I forgot about that!" He said around that boisterous cackle of his.

"The hell are you laughin' about?" Gajeel muttered.

Laxus deftly elbowed the Seith mage in a spot he knew would cause just enough pain for him to shut up but not scream in agony. As much as he loved shocking the guy, he knew if he did so in front of what was technically his girlfriend (or, Demon-friend as Laxus liked to put it when she wasn't in earshot) then he'd be sleeping on the lounge – in his own apartment at that since Mira had plans to stay over at Laxus' that night.

But Laxus would be sleeping on his lounge regardless it seemed since Mira had actually seen him elbow Bickslow and in her books, shocking was the same as elbowing. "Laxus, that wasn't very nice." The Take Over mage said with a small frown.

"Sorry, De _-Mira_ …" Laxus muttered.

"I can't believe you two are actually together." Bickslow finally said as he clutched his side.

"They're what?" Levy and Lucy said in unison, eyes wide as they looked between Laxus and Mira who was grinning sheepishly.

"Since when?" Lucy asked as she put down her glass.

A shrug from the white-haired woman as she tucked the serving tray under her arm. "Since the games."

Laxus could only scowl as Mira walked away. It was bad enough that her stupid siblings knew about them, but now his entire team knew, plus Gajeel, and then Lucy and Levy. Laxus had always lived a pretty secretive life, just because he didn't think anyone needed to know every single detail of it. Mira, however, disagreed with his way of living. To Laxus, it was a pain. He could only be glad that the entire guild didn't know (yet).

* * *

Lucy looked up from the book she'd been reading with a small yawn, stretching her arms above her head before she looked back down to the table and slammed the book shut.

At the sound, Bickslow turned his head slightly from where he had it resting on his arms. "You leaving?" He slurred, having had a bit too much to drink over the course of the night.

"Yeah," Lucy said with a small sigh as she picked up the book and tucked it under her arm. "Catching the first train out in the morning so I want to head home and get some sleep."

"Mmkay," Bickslow mumbled, sitting up slowly. "Come see me in the morning before you leave."

She walked around the back of the bench slowly as Bickslow turned in his seat to continue facing her. "That will be at 6:30 in the morning, Bicks." Lucy giggled.

"I can go back to sleep after."

"If you insist," Lucy said as she leant down over the back of the bench, briefly pressing their lips together before separating as Gajeel made a gagging sound that warranted an elbow from the Script mage. "Alright, gotta go. Love you, Bicks." She said with a slight giggle.

"Love you too, Cosplayer." Bickslow mumbled as his head went back to the table and Lucy turned to head for the doors.

"It's so disgusting I'm gonna puke." Gajeel muttered.

* * *

Lucy yawned as she climbed the steps one at a time to Bickslow's second floor apartment. When the tenant of the apartment next to his locked the door behind himself and passed her in the short hall with a scowl, Lucy could only smile and wave, only just catching the 'I actually got some sleep last night' the man muttered before he headed down the steps.

Bickslow's apartment was dark as usual. Without thinking, she pushed open the dark curtains in his living room, bathing the room in the early morning light as she looked down at the canal that ran along the back of his building. _I wish I had taller windows_ , she thought before she turned to push open the shutters above the kitchen sink, leaning her hands on the sides as she enjoyed the smell of the freshly baked bread coming from the bakery a few buildings down.

But she wasn't there to enjoy the smell of the freshly baked bread in the mornings. She was there to wake up her boyfriend, as he'd so insisted.

Lucy giggled quietly at the sight of Bickslow sprawled across the bed diagonally – one foot hanging over the side as he lay tangled up amongst the sheets with the duvet half on the floor and half on the bed. It was a miracle he didn't end up waking up like that every time Lucy stayed over because every time he slept on his own, that's how he'd end up. Always.

She jumped up onto the mattress before moving to seat herself on his back, her knees on either side of his surprisingly narrow waist – well, compared to his shoulders anyway. Bickslow grunted into the pillow at the sudden weight on his back as he slowly opened an eye, squinting as he got used to the light shining through the door from the rest of his apartment.

"Morning, baby." He mumbled, instantly grimacing when he realised he'd let 'baby' slip again. Since he'd starting dating Lucy, he'd paid special attention to the words he used around her and baby was one of them. It was just one of those words he'd always used and no one had ever paid much attention to it. He liked to think of it as his own version of Natsu's 'I'm fired up.'

But there were a few times he'd use it when referring _to_ Lucy and they'd all been when he was half asleep or just waking up. Personally, Bickslow liked it just because it was one of those words he liked to use, but he never really knew that Lucy thought of it. He still preferred Cosplayer over anything and he always would.

"Baby again, huh?" Lucy giggled as she leant forward, folding her arms across the back of his shoulders and resting her chin on them. It was a strangely comfortable position.

"Shut up," He mumbled into the pillow. "You're hurting my back." And she really was. Not because she was heavy, because really, she wasn't. It was just that where she was sitting was really uncomfortable for him. If she'd been sitting slightly higher or lower on his back, it would be fine.

"Aw, am I too heavy for you?"

Bickslow scoffed as he closed his eyes again. "Yes." He knew she wasn't going to take offense to it, so he could get away with it. Well, he hoped, anyway.

Another giggle from the blonde as she sat up slightly, still not moving from her seat. "Maybe that's because there's two people sitting you."

Every single muscle in his body tensed as his eyes shot open again, staring at the blonde on top of him from the corner of his vision. "…What?" _No… what? No. It's got to be a joke. She has to be messing with me 'cause I messed with her._

Her giggles turned into a full blown laughing fit as she moved to lay on the bed next to him. "Oh God. Calm down," She choked out, "It was a joke." _A pretty funny joke if you ask me._

"That was not," Bickslow said as his arm snaked around her waist to pull her in to his side, moving to kiss her briefly, "a funny joke." He finished.

"Yes it was."

"It really wasn't," But he couldn't help but smirk. Partly because it was a little funny if he thought about it. That and he was staring back at the grinning face of his girlfriend. It was kind of hard not to smile. "When do you have to leave?"

"In a few minutes." She said with a small sigh.

"What's the job again?"

"A dark guild that popped up recently. I think the request from the town said they were called something like 'Svik Thorne Er,'" Lucy mumbled, resting her head on her folded arms. "I should be back tomorrow or the day after though."

Bickslow furrowed his brow slightly. "I've heard that before," He mumbled. _Where have I heard that name before?_ "Which town?"

An airy laugh left her throat. "I can't remember the name of it. What's with all the questions?"

"I just want to know where you are in case something happens."

"Bicks, it's a simple job. I'll be fine."

"I know you will be, but just in case," He mumbled, "I'd be a pretty shitty boyfriend if I didn't worry about you, especially when you always manage to get hurt somehow."

Lucy scoffed as she sat up slowly. "Okay, not _always_ ," _Like… 99% of the time, somehow._ As Bickslow rolled onto his back she reached into her key pouch to find Horologium's, and with a quiet sigh, she turned back to face Bickslow. "I should probably get going though. Erza wanted us to try and get to the station more than five minutes before the train departs for once."

"Doubt that will happen," He said with a hint of a smirk as he pushed himself to sit up, rubbing his eyes as he did so. "But seriously, be careful, okay?"

"Bickslow, it's going to be fine," Lucy groaned as she sat up on her knees, "But just for you, I'll be extra careful, alright?"

"Good."

She leaned in to press a kiss to his cheek before climbing off the bed, "I'll see you when I get back." She said over her shoulder.

"Mmkay," He mumbled, lying back down again. Then, as he turned his head to face the door, "I love you, Lucy."

"I love you too, Bicks." She called from down the hall with a smile he couldn't see.

So as Lucy walked through the streets of Magnolia in the crisp winter air, heading for the train station where she'd most likely only find Erza and Gray right until the last minute, Bickslow slowly got comfortable on his bed again.

Ever since she'd mentioned that guild's name, he had an uneasy feeling he couldn't shake. He'd heard it before but he didn't know where, but he also knew there was nothing he could do about that at whatever ungodly hour it was.

With a sigh, he closed his eyes and pulled the blanket over his head in an attempt to make it at least appear like it wasn't morning. He could always ask Freed about it when he eventually woke up again. If anything, the Rune mage would probably tell him it's nothing and Bickslow would be able to put his anxiety down to not wanting Lucy to get hurt (not too much) and his making things out of nothing.

 _Yeah, that's what will probably happen._

* * *

When Bickslow eventually got to the guild at his usual time of 'some point after noon' he instantly went searching for Freed. A quick once-over of the hall and he spotted the man at the request board.

Freed turned his head when he saw someone approaching and his focus returned to the almost overflowing board. "Good morning, Bickslow." He murmured. If he wasn't too busy searching for a request he'd seen the day before, he would have at least tried to seem like he was interested in the man's wellbeing.

But Freed had been up all night worrying about what he'd seen on that one job request that he could not find that morning for the life of him. The worst part was that because he'd only glanced at it the day before, he couldn't remember every detail about it, so when he'd stayed up to go over every book he thought would be helpful, he found nothing. He didn't remember enough about it for his books to be of any use, so he just had to hope that the request was still there. Somewhere.

Bickslow folded his arms across his chest as he looked over the requests beside Freed. Maybe one of them they'd be able to do in a day or so, just for something to kill the time with. "Hey, have you heard 'Svik Thorne Er' before?"

And just like that, Freed's focus on the board was lost as he turned to stare at the Seith mage. "Where did you hear that?" He asked in a gruff voice.

"Lucy mentioned it this morning and— woah, Freed," Bickslow had to take a step back when he turned to look at the Rune mage. He rarely saw the man with a look so determined and honestly chilling. He had his pervy grins that were mostly for Laxus' benefit and he had his focused looks, but this was something else. He almost looked scared to Bickslow. "What's the matter?"

Freed took a steadying breath as he closed his eyes, counting to three in his head. "Bickslow, you've heard those words before, correct?"

"Yeah, that's the thing – Lucy said it was the name of a dark guild that _recently_ popped up so it doesn't make any sense."

When Freed looked down before turning and rushing off towards Levy, Bickslow felt the panic well up inside him. Freed was acting weird and it had something to do with the guild name that he couldn't remember where he'd heard before, and by the looks of it, Freed had heard it before.

"Freed, wait!" Bickslow called, running after the man, "Tell me what's going on."

"Be quiet, Bickslow." Freed snapped and it made the Seith mage flinch. Then, turning to Levy when he got to the table, "Levy, I require your assistance. Are you able to translate something for me?"

"Of course." She said with a small smile as she pushed her own books aside and into where Gajeel had his head resting on the table.

So as Freed wrote down the name on a scrap piece of paper, he glanced up at Bickslow. "So I take it Lucy's team took that request? When Bickslow nodded, Freed continued, "Did she mention anything else? Where she was going? Anything?"

"I-I don't know… I asked her which town it was in but she said she couldn't remember the name," He had to fold his arms across his chest just to stop his hands from shaking and the need to fidget. "Freed, please tell me what's going on." Bickslow whispered.

With a sigh, Freed turned and motioned for the Seith mage to follow him. "I saw the request yesterday and I remembered seeing something very similar to it once before – a few years before the Tenrou incident, if memory serves me correct." He said as they walked down the stairs to the basement slowly. "Something about that name is making me anxious. That request should not have been here though; I know that much."

"What do you mean…?" Bickslow was on the verge of having a panic attack at that point. If it was making Freed anxious then it was not good, but he had to remind himself to remain calm. Until he had all of the information, at least.

"I'm not sure myself," Freed mumbled as he moved over to the large communications lacrima, wiping the fine layer of dust from it with his coat sleeve. "Bickslow, would you please go ask Mira if she recorded any details from Team Natsu's job?"

"Uh… yeah, sure…"

As Bickslow turned to head up the stairs slowly, still trying to tell himself to remain calm, Freed opened a line with none other than the Blue Pegasus Guild Master.

Freed cleared his throat as the bald man appeared on the lacrima. "Good afternoon, Master Bob. It is Freed Justine from Fairy Tail. I hope all is well."

"Why, hello, Freed," The Blue Pegasus Guild Master said as he rests his chin in his hands, "What can I help you with? I trust old Makarov is alright?"

"Makarov is fine, yes. I actually need to talk with one of your members: Hibiki Lates. Is he there? It is a rather urgent matter."

"Hm, I'll just see…" He picked his head up from his hands as he stood up from where he'd been leaning over the bar and Freed shuddered slightly as he closed his eyes, trying to block out the sight. "HIBIKIIII!" Bob shouted.

"Yes, Master?" Was heard before all three of the Trimens appeared on the edge of the lacrima's vision before Hibiki moved into the centre and smiled at the image of Freed. "How can I help you, Freed?" He asked politely.

The Rune mage clasped his hands behind his back as he cleared his throat again. "If possible, I need you to find everything you can on 'Svik Thorne Er' using your Archive."

Bob's head popped into vision again. "Svik Thorne Er?" He said warily.

"Yes, that is correct. I fear one of our teams have been put in grave danger, so Hibiki, if you'd please. I would be ever so grateful and would return the favour whenever I can."

"Of course. Anything for Fairy Tail," Hibiki said with a forced smile, pushing Bob's head out of the way. "I'll get back to you when I have some information. Good bye for now, Freed."

Freed sighed when the lacrima returned to normal and he could no longer feel his magic powering it. With Hibiki using his Archive and Levy translating it, they should be able to figure it out. All they had to do was find out where they were, and hopefully, everything would be okay and no one would get hurt if they got there in time – especially Lucy.

He knew that something bad was going to happen either way.

When Bickslow came back down with the details on the job Team Natsu had taken, Freed was pacing the area with this fingers under his chin. Mira had made almost a carbon copy of the original request, like she did for every request that anyone took. It was always just a precaution, just in case they should find themselves in trouble and they need help. It rarely happened, but for once Bickslow was honestly glad she'd done it.

The longer he stared at the small map in one corner of it, the more confused he got. There was a small dot with an arrow marked just north of Oak Town. Bickslow had lived in Fiore his entire life and he knew for a fact that there was no town just north of Oak Town.

Not anymore, anyway.

Once upon a time though, there had been a town. A small town. So small, it could barely even be called a town. It had been destroyed in some guild war years before Bickslow even existed and the only reason he knew about it was because his father had been involved in the clean-up of it and it was one of those stories he'd always loved hearing about as a kid.

But to that very day, all that remained in that location were the ruins of what was once a small town, and he knew that for a fact because they'd passed through it only a few months prior. There was no possible way that a fully functioning and thriving town could have been built in such a small time frame, so why the hell was there a request coming from what was once called Larch Town?

Freed looked up from his pacing when he heard the heavy steps down the stairs and he rushed over to Bickslow as he held the paper out. He read over every single word on the page once, then again, just to make sure he'd read it right. "Larch Town…?" He whispered, briefly looking up to Bickslow who was back to having his arms folded. "This is not good…"

"Freed, for the love of God, please tell me what's going on." Bickslow said slowly, his voice wavering slightly. If Freed was saying it wasn't good, then it really was not good. At all.

"I can't, not yet-" They both turned as Levy came bounding down the stairs, still with her Gale-Force glasses on.

"I've got it!" She said, breathless as she ran up to the two men.

"And? What does it mean?" Freed demanded.

"It's an old language, so it was hard to get the exact translation, but it roughly translates to 'Thorne's Deceit.'"

"Thorne…?" Bickslow repeated as he looked back to Freed, "Wasn't there some guy called Thorne in-" And then every shred of colour left his face when he remembered where he'd heard it before. It wasn't just the name of a Dark Guild – it was the name of a guild that shouldn't exist anymore. "Freed… please, tell me that's not what this is…" He whispered.

Freed sighed as he walked back over to the lacrima. "I'm still waiting for Hibiki of Blue Pegasus to get back to me with what he can find with his Archive. I'm still not too sure though…" "

"Wait… what's going on?" Levy asked as she looked frantically between the two.

"Something really fucking bad, that's what." Bickslow mumbled as he started pacing the room like Freed had been.

Bickslow knew there had been something about that job when Lucy had mentioned it that morning. He shouldn't have gone back to bed. Instead, he should have gone to the guild or Freed's house. Something. _Anything_.

Bickslow wasn't worrying for nothing – oh no, far from it.

Once, a few years before the Tenrou incident, Laxus and the Raijinshuu had been planning on taking a request for destroying a dark guild under the name of Svik Thorne Er, but they'd been stopped by Makarov. They were not a guild that could easily be taken down with four people. In fact, it would be closer to a suicide mission had they done that job. They were all masters of deception and trickery, using illusions to lure teams from legal guilds and faked requests from towns that didn't exist.

Svik Thorne Er – or Thorne's Deceit – had been destroyed, once, and it had taken the entirety of Blue Pegasus and many of the members of Fairy Tail to do so. The Master, Thorne, had been imprisoned and the guild disbanded by force and that was the last anyone had heard of the guild of deceit for a while.

Until that day, that is. Somehow, the Thorne's Deceit was back and were back to their old tricks of using towns that no longer exist or never existed to trick mages into believing there's a small dark guild around the area - easy job. Whether or not Thorne himself was back at the helm was a mystery, but that's not what terrified Bickslow and Freed the most.

In the seven years that they'd been gone, everyone had improved. Not just those in Fairy Tail or any other legal guilds in Fiore, but those in Dark Guilds as well. Majority of the original members of Thorne's Deceit had escaped or fled, with only a few getting imprisoned like their master. It was safe to say that those that had fled had a grudge, and if it had taken more than an entire guild to shut them down in the first place, then they were going to be an even tougher opponent now.

But to Bickslow, that wasn't really the most worrisome part. It was that Lucy's team had been the one to get drawn in by the bait, and honestly, Bickslow couldn't be mad, not after his own team had made the same mistake. The only difference was that someone had stopped them before they could leave. Makarov wasn't there when her team had taken the job so there was nothing anyone could have done unless they'd specifically mentioned what job they were doing, and they hadn't.

He could feel his chest tighten as he continued pacing. He couldn't breathe. Lucy was in danger with the rest of her team and there wasn't anything he could do about it – not alone, anyway. He was smart enough to know that running after her and into a trap was not going to end well, and that was if he managed to even make it out of the guild. Freed would no doubt tell Laxus, and Laxus would tell the Master (wherever he was, anyway) and then maybe, just maybe, they'd be able to get there in time to save them.

"Fuck." Bickslow whispered as he bent over slightly, his hands resting on his knees as he tried to steady his breathing, his jaw in a firm line as he stared down at the floor.

"Bickslow? Are you okay?" Levy asked quietly, reaching out to place her hand on the cloak-covered shoulder.

He nodded once, "Yeah, great. Girlfriend's probably going to get herself killed, but great." He said sardonically before dropping his head even more, squeezing his eyes shut. He wasn't ready to have his happiness ripped away from him, not when he'd only just got it back.

"What?" Levy shouted, looking up to Freed who was shaking his head.

"You don't know that for sure, Bickslow," The Rune mage said, turning to look at the lacrima when he saw it flash briefly. "It could just be a prank of some sort."

"Pretty fucking cruel prank if it is." Bickslow shot back.

It wasn't Hibiki who appeared when the lacrima finally flickered to show the image, it was Bob again. "Freed? Where's Makarov?" He asked quietly – not a single trace of his usual smile was on his face.

"I'm afraid the master is not here at the moment. Did Hibiki find anything?" Freed replied, folding his arms across his chest.

"Unfortunately, yes. You're aware of their history, correct?" Bob said, glancing behind him to where Hibiki was still scouring his Archive for information. When Freed nodded, he continued, "Thorne was released from prison on good behaviour recently, however, it appears Thorne's Deceit never truly disbanded."

"What do you mean?"

"Thorne has a daughter – she fled following his imprisonment, but recently, there have been sightings of her around Oak Town, sporting the guild crest, no less. It's possible she has been acting master for the reformed Thorne's Deceit since her father was imprisoned."

"Absolutely fucking brilliant." Bickslow spat.

A sorrowful glare from Freed in Bickslow's direction before he turned back to the lacrima. "Master Bob, now if I may ask…" He held up the request in front of the lacrima for the Blue Pegasus master to read, "If this were to have appeared on our request board, it would be correct to assume that Svik Thorne Er are well and truly 'back' and are back to their old habits?"

Bob squinted as he leant in close, reading over the request in the communications lacrima before sitting back. With a small frown he nodded. "I'm afraid so, Freed. From memory, that points to Larch Town, which would explain the Oak Town sightings."

At that point, Bickslow was unable to listen anymore. If he looked up, he could see Freed's mouth moving and Bob's on the lacrima but he couldn't hear anything. Just silence. Everything was in slow motion and to Bickslow, it felt like the world as he knew it was crumbling around him.

He could vaguely feel himself falling back to sit on the floor, and then he was sitting with his knees up and his hands clasped behind his head as he looked down at the floor.

Even though he'd already jumped to the conclusion that Thorne's Deceit was back and that Lucy and her team really had walked into a trap, hearing it from someone else just made it much more real. That was the reality. It wasn't just him worrying about her and wanting her to always be safe.

The reality was that her team had unwillingly walked into a trap and they wouldn't realise it until it was too late.

Even though he wanted to just go to Larch Town – or what was left of it – he knew he couldn't. There was nothing he could do and he didn't know if that's what was hurting him or it was the fact he'd lose Lucy.

* * *

 **Duh duh duhhh! What's going to happen?!**

 **Please remember to review and follow and favourite and all of those things that I love because you're absolutely amazing and I love you all!**

 **But for the time being, I need to go and catch up on some lectures and tutorial recordings that I missed from like... a week ago. Oops.**

 **\- April**


	31. Chapter 31

**Thank you guys so much for the reviews on the last chapter!**  
 **Cliff hangers are fun, don't you think? :D**

 **Anyway, I hope that this makes up for such a terrible ending to the last chapter.**

* * *

The group walked slowly through the quiet streets of Larch Town. Despite being the middle of the day, there was no one out. It was almost like a ghost town. Every shop was empty, every house was locked up tight, and every stall was like the owner had left randomly and forgotten about it.

Lucy turned at the sound of a stack of crates toppling over behind her, bumping into Natsu when she jumped slightly. "Careful, Lucy." He muttered as he caught her elbows, stopping her from falling.

He looked around at everything – the town flags that looked like they'd been there for years; worn and torn as they flapped viciously in the strong wind. The canopies over the various stalls in the market streets they were in looked just about ready to be blown away with the next strong gush of wind. But those weren't what bothered Natsu.

No one was there except them.

"I thought this town got abandoned years ago…" Gray mused as he looked up at the buildings that looked almost too perfect. Not a single brick was out of line. Everything was symmetrical.

"So did I," Erza mumbled, "Perhaps they rebuilt it?"

"Yeah, maybe…"

Lucy's hands wrapped around her upper arms, rubbing up and down when an extra cold gush of wind came from behind them, blowing her hair forward and into her face slightly. She looked down to Wendy who was doing the same thing as she. _The poor girl_ , Lucy thought, and she reached into her key pouch.

"Open Gate of the Clock! Horologium!" She said, pointing the key towards the space in front of her. When her friends turned to her with quizzical expressions, she turned back to Wendy as her spirit appeared. "Here, Wendy. It will be warmer."

"Oh, Lucy… I'm fine-" The young Dragon Slayer had tried to say, only to have Horologium scoop her up.

"'I'm really fine,' she says." Horologium finished as they all began walking again.

With a slight giggle Lucy said, "It's alright, Wendy."

So slowly they all continued to walk along the streets of Larch Town, all of them becoming more and more suspicious as they went. None of it made sense to the team. Why request help from the wizard guilds if there's going to be no one there to greet them and explain the job further?

Eventually, they all came to be at the town centre again. They'd walked every single street, alley, and path in the small town and they hadn't seen a single soul – hell, not even a cat (apart from Happy and Carla). There was no one there.

"I don't like this." Natsu muttered as he looked around, his nose in the air, trying to catch anything.

"Neither do I." Lucy whispered. Then, something caught her eye. A faint glimmer. She turned to face where she thought it had been and stopped, her brow furrowed. "Wait, wasn't there just…?" _There was a building there a second ago, I swear it._

And slowly, one by one, every single perfectly sculptured building that surrounded the town square disappeared, and then the vendor stands and the marble fountain. They all spun around in circles, trying to see what was going on, but they were too late.

They all backed into each other – Wendy fell slightly when Horologium's time was up before Lucy pulled her in close – to have vision of every angle.

They weren't standing in the immaculate town centre they had just been – no, it was almost as if they were in a destroyed version of it. The marble fountain had been destroyed, completely dried up and faded with age and covered in mould with roots coming up from between the cracks in the cobblestone. No perfectly sculptured buildings, only ruins.

Suddenly, dozens upon dozens of men clad in dark clothes emerged from the alleys surrounding them – the alleys they'd been down just minutes earlier and had been empty.

"Well, look what we have here, boys," A man drawled and they all turned to see the tall figure emerge from the crowd that had surrounded him. His black hair that was slicked back and just reached the top of his fur trimmed collar was streaked with grey. Snickers from the crowd as he continued walking towards the small group, then, he tossed the dark red apple he'd been holding up in the air before catching it in his hand and he took a large bite from it. "Looks like we found ourselves a few fairies."

* * *

"Bickslow, calm down." Evergreen pleaded as she tried to catch the man pacing back and forth in front of the bar.

He shook his head. "Can't." He mumbled.

"We'll think of something, alright?"

"No point." _What the fuck am I saying? Of course there's a point._ _Lucy's the point, dumbass._

With a roll of his eyes, Gajeel stood from the table he'd been leaning on by the bar and grabbed the Seith mage by his shoulders and pushed him down into a stool. The guy was making him dizzy somehow. "Listen, you moron. We'll get Bunny-girl back, alright? Hell, even Salamander too if we must, so quit bein' such a pain in the ass."

Bickslow couldn't even respond. He had to hold on to that tiny bit of hope he had left. He had to believe that they'd get everything sorted out in time to get to Larch Town or wherever it was they were. He had to believe it wasn't too late.

Laxus walked into the main guildhall with a loud sigh as he moved across the floor to stand before his worried comrades. By that point, the few that were left over in the guild that day had heard what was going on and there were many who had been in the guild the first time Thorne's Deceit had been a problem, so they knew just how much of an issue they were.

"Right then," Laxus said, getting the attention of everyone in the room as he folded his arms. "Master Bob has offered us Blue Pegasus' assistance and he is currently contacting Lamia Scale's master for us. That being said, it took two legal guilds to take those fuckers down last time and we don't have nearly as many people as that this time around."

He looked over each person, and Laxus realised that it didn't matter what he said, they were all still going to go out there and help, whether it was a suicide mission or not. They'd already made up their minds; it was just a matter of them waiting for him to finally say it. On the inside, he smiled, just because it was so like Fairy Tail to be like that. They were destructive, loud, ridiculous, stupid, reckless, you name it; but they were a family, and right then, a part of that family was in trouble. It didn't matter what the cost was, because they'd still at least try and find a way to help them.

"Blue Pegasus has that… airship… thing… on the way. Whether or not you want to come is solely up to you, but Thorne's Deceit are a dangerous guild and your safety will be up to you – not me, not anyone else, _you_."

"Yeah yeah, we get it, Sparky." Cana slurred.

"In that case… who will be coming?" And at that, almost every hand in the room went up. With a sigh, he unfolded his arms and looked over the group again before focusing on Bickslow, not that he noticed. "Let's go get them back then."

The hall erupted into various cheers and shouts as they all made their way to the door. Bickslow pushed himself up from the stool slowly and went to follow them, only to have a hand push into the front of his shoulder and stop him from moving. "No way, Bicks." Laxus muttered.

Bickslow shook his head. "Laxus… I can't…" He whispered, still not looking up. "I can't just sit here and wait to find out whether she's dead or not… I can't do that."

Then, after a moment, Laxus finally drew his hand back and shoved his hands in his pockets and turned slightly. "I'm not saving your ass if you get distracted."

* * *

A scream ripped from Lucy's throat when she felt every pain receptor in her body light up and she fell to her knees in the ruins of the town square before tipping over to the side. Her eyes stung as she held them shut. She wasn't going to cry. She was _not_ going to cry. Not a single tear.

Her hands were tied behind her back and the rope was digging into her wrists. She didn't have to see them to know the skin was raw and bleeding from the rope because she could feel it.

They'd taken her keys when they'd tied her up and then they'd taken them somewhere. She didn't know where, just like how she didn't know where her friends were. Her family. Her team. She didn't know where they were but she could hear their cries and screams of pain intermittently.

Suddenly, Lucy was yanked back to her feet by her hair and she grit her teeth at the pain that ran through her.

"Fairy likes to scream, huh?" One of them whispered in her ear, his tongue trailing up the side of her neck and she grimaced. Lucy had learned not to fight it, otherwise it just made things worse.

She just had to bear with it – the only problem was that she didn't know how much longer she could.

Natsu and Gray's screams were heard at the same time, like they were every other time. The group around Lucy would always chuckle each time someone screamed, and then when it got around to be the blonde's turn, they'd all point and shout out what should be done next. None of them ever got done though, just because they knew the pain was enough.

"Lo…ke…" She whispered when her back was slammed into an old column. She didn't have her keys, but Loke could still open his gate. _Please, Loke… I need you…_

But no matter how much she begged her spirit, he'd never appear and she could only assume they'd done something to his key.

Lucy could feel the tingling and she knew what was coming. It always began with a slight tingling and it would work its way up to being the most excruciating pain she'd ever experienced. Over and over again.

She couldn't fall forward that time. It was like there was something pressing into her front to keep her upright and pushing her into the stone column. Another scream ripped through her as her head went back and into the stone.

It wasn't just a few seconds of the excruciating pain like it usually was and she'd usually have a few minutes to try and recover; prepare herself for the next time they did it. No, it wasn't that. It was constant pain.

She could barely hear the laughter over the sound of her heart beating in her ears and she couldn't hear the screams of her friends, nor the screams of those surrounding them. She couldn't even hear her own screams anymore. Someone had been pushed too hard and cracked, but it didn't matter, because Lucy couldn't hear it. A tear rolled down her cheek as she screamed again and she held her eyes shut.

For hours, that's what it had been like. Or so she thought, anyway. The sun was setting slowly, and if it were under different circumstances, she would have said the red and pink sky was one of the most beautiful things she'd ever seen – she would have sat there and watched the sun go down before staring up at the night sky until she'd fallen asleep.

But there was nothing beautiful about it. If anything, it just made her all too aware of the fact that she wasn't getting out of it. She wasn't going to see another sunset like that in her life.

The pain just never stopped and Lucy didn't know if she was screaming or not. There was nothing but the pain, but it was too much. She'd reached her limit.

She was done. She just wanted it to be over.

* * *

When the guilds finally arrived, everything had been thrown into chaos. Natsu and Gray were outnumbered three-to-one, Wendy was trying to do her best to support Erza in a losing battle, and Bickslow couldn't find Lucy, not that he could get to her anyway.

It was a little ironic that the sky matched the colour of the blood staining the ground all around them, whether it was their friend or foe's blood was a mystery and it was something that no one wanted to think about too much.

A blood-curdling scream was heard over everything – the cries of pain, the shouts of terror, explosions, the sounds of what was left of the buildings being turned to dust whenever someone was sent through the remnant of a wall. Everything. But it wasn't the scream itself that was the issue, it was who it had come from, and it made Bickslow's blood run cold.

It was Lucy who was screaming and there wasn't anything he could do to stop it. And as much as he hated the sound of it, it was also the only thing that kept him from losing focus. Even though her being in pain was enough to be in pain, he needed her to stay like that, as fucked up as it was.

To Bickslow, it was a game, and Lucy was the prize.

Bickslow had always liked games. Always. They were simultaneously fun and challenging and that's what he loved about them. He was always finding new ways to have fun and entertain himself if not others, and if it challenged him then it really just made it all the more fun.

There were some games, however, that were never fun. They were just challenging, but Bickslow liked to finish things. That's what this was – it was a game. It wasn't fun, far from it, actually, but it was a challenge. He had to beat the game to get to Lucy, and he had to do it before it was too late. That was the challenging part, because he didn't know how long that was.

To get to Lucy. That's all that mattered.

"You fuckers," Laxus growled, kicking one man in the stomach and into a group of three more, "ripped," A shock to another, "my fucking coat."

" _That's_ what you're worried about?!" Bickslow shouted as he jumped up onto one of his babies, kicking off backwards and narrowly missing a blow from behind. "Shouldn't have done that!" He laughed with his tongue sticking out as the dolls lined up, spinning around the shocked man who was trying to figure out what was going on before they began to glow.

Gajeel's shouted curses could be heard from the end of the street as he spun in a circle, his iron club running through each and every person as they turned to smoke – they were all an illusion and he was in a smoke screen. He couldn't see, but he could still smell and he could still hear. As he heard the quiet footsteps coming up from behind him, he stopped, waiting for precisely the right moment.

Then, in a split second, Gajeel had spun around and pushed the cloak-clad man into the ground and on his back, Gajeel's hand around his throat as he stared down at him, "Don't fuck with a dragon." He snarled before he stood up and dug his foot into the man's chest, the audible crack of his ribs as he spluttered and he was pushed into the ground even more.

When the smoke finally cleared in the area, he smirked. Piles and piles of bodies – some moving, some not – littered the street.

"Well, I'd say this street is clear, for now." Freed remarked as he dusted off his coat sleeve, following his team to where Gajeel stood, admiring his work, apparently.

For the most part, it was easier to go about it in streets. That was the plan – something that Team Natsu didn't understand the concept of. If teams were assigned streets, then they'd be able to go about it in a logical and systematic order. If the fights were heavily in favour of one side, then it would be tough, and if it was the guilds who were winning per se, then they'd be able to move on to other streets and help out others who were perhaps losing. Which, as it turns out, was the case for a few.

But so far, they'd come across everyone of Team Natsu except Lucy, and that worried them all.

The group rushed into the next street where they heard the screaming, and they got there just in time to see Elfman throw his arms up in the air with a wide grin and shout, "None of you are manly!" He'd been able to stand there with his arms folded as he got attacked – the perks of his Lizardman take over.

Mira was panting as she leant over, her hands on her knees as she returned from her Satan Soul. While Elfman might have had an easy time, herself and Lisanna hadn't, not really, anyway. They'd still managed to come out of it without getting too hurt, which was what was important.

"Shit, Mira," Laxus said, running up to the eldest Strauss as his arm went around her back, holding her up, "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine…" She said, straightening up and wincing slightly when she took a step. She looked down to see a large gash down the side of her leg. _Nothing like that is going to stop me from getting my family back_ , Mira thought.

"I take it you guys haven't found Lucy yet either?" Lisanna asked as she moved to assist Mira.

Before anyone could even think about their answers and how to phrase them as to not hurting the Seith mage even more and causing him to worry more than he already was, it was Bickslow who actually answered. "No." He said. He didn't see the point of saying anything else, because that was the answer – they hadn't found her yet.

But Bickslow had to believe that they would. Eventually. Soon, preferably, but eventually. They had to find her, because if they didn't, Bickslow didn't know what he would do. It was honestly a little funny – it was like the universe was out to get him. Bickslow had always had an odd sense of humour.

It just had to be Lucy Heartfilia he'd fallen in love with – after everything he did to her in the past, it just had to be her. Had he forgiven himself for any of it yet? No, but he had accepted it. Did he believe that he was actually good enough for her? Not even close, and he never would be, because to Bickslow, Lucy was probably too good for everyone. Was he putting her on a pedestal? Probably. But that didn't matter, because _she_ loved _him_. For reasons Bickslow would probably never understand, she chose him over, well… anyone.

He was happy with Lucy – happier than he ever thought he could have been. He didn't miss his old lifestyle when he was with her, not one bit. He had everything he needed and wanted with Lucy.

He had to believe they'd find her and she'd be fine just because he wasn't ready to lose his happiness. He wasn't ready to lose Lucy.

Plus, he was seriously going to kick whoever's ass it was that made her scream like that. He'd do that whether she was fine or not, but he was seriously hoping it would be the former.

"I'm sorry, Bickslow." Mira sniffed, her head down.

"What for?"

"I saw the job they were going on… I should have recognised the name. If I had, none of this ever would have happened and they'd all be fine… Lucy would be-"

"None of this is your fault. It's not anyone's fault." Bickslow interrupted.

Mira looked up, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "Yes, it is. I was here the last time they tried this, I _know_ what they're capable of. I've seen it. I just… it was right there in front of me, and I didn't see it. I'm sorry."

Bickslow sighed as he looked up at the darkening sky. "No one recognised it," He mumbled. "I didn't recognise it and she told me what she doing. There wasn't anything anyone could have done, so please, just stop feeling guilty, because I can guarantee you that I feel worse than all of you right now."

And he really did. In a way, he blamed himself for all of it. If he'd recognised the name of the guild, then he could have stopped her – he could have stopped her team and none of it would have happened.

But no one realised what they were doing, because no one expected it to happen. Thorne was in prison and as far as everyone knew, the guild was dead. Gone. There was nothing left. But it had all been a lie. No one had seen any of it coming, so there was no point of feeling guilty over it.

It was just something familiar they'd heard but couldn't remember where. It happened every day.

But Bickslow still felt like he could have stopped it all, if only he'd remembered.

* * *

Lucy woke up to the feeling of her body being set ablaze with pain once again. When she opened her eyes slowly, she could see she was still in the town centre, but it was dark. Nothing was tinted red with the sunset like it had been the last time she remembered being awake, but instead it was lit up in silver by the moon in the night sky.

When she looked up, she ignored the pain that was fading – they were giving her a break again, thank heavens. Thousands upon thousands of stars were scattered across the sky and the corners of her mouth upturned in a smile – just barely.

She'd always loved looking at the stars, ever since she was a child. She could lay back and pretend she could count them all or she could point out each and every constellation of her beloved spirits, or she could just stare up at them. It was one of the rare times she could just do nothing and be totally content.

She'd wanted to just lie under the stars with Bickslow one day, but when she looked up at the stars then, she knew it wasn't going to happen. She wasn't going to get to see those stars again.

"Come on, daddy," A dark haired woman whined, "She's awake now. Can't we just kill her now?"

A short laugh from the man who'd been causing her pain all afternoon as he moved to stand in front of Lucy, a devilish smirk in place as he peered at her. "Now now, Natasha. I told you we have to make the fairies watch," Thorne said over his shoulder, then, as he turned back to Lucy, "Your little friends are going to see your blood fill this fountain and see just what it means to go against my guild." He snarled.

It was only then that Lucy realised that she was no longer pushed up against the old column like she had been earlier. Instead, her back was pressed into the intricate detail of the destroyed fountain, yet it was no longer destroyed. It was like it had been before the illusions had faded when they'd first arrived – the marble sparkled and the water jets had been turned off, and when she looked down, she could see the few inches of water in the basin.

A sigh from Natasha as a regal throne appeared just behind her in a small black puff of smoke before she seated herself, crossing one leg over her knee and resting her chin in her palm on one of the armrests. "Fine," She mumbled, "But they better hurry up. I'm bored."

"Perhaps some more screaming will draw them out?" Thorne said as he turned back to Lucy. Slowly, he raised his arm, his hand outstretched towards her before balling it into a fist and drawing his arm back into his side.

Another scream ripped through her throat at the excruciating pain. She could feel the pressure building in her back and her front simultaneously – he was pushing her further into the fountain's statue. She could feel every single detail on the marble against her back.

"Please… just…" She whispered, panting when she was given another reprieve. "Kill me… already…"

Lucy had accepted her death – it was inevitable at that point. They were just drawing it out; she was a toy to them. She knew that they were doing it just to get back at the guilds that had put him in prison. It was just revenge, really.

She knew she was going to die, but she didn't want her friends; her family to see it. She didn't want anyone to.

* * *

Everywhere they looked, there were piles and piles of bodies (no one ever paid attention to whether they were breathing or not), all with the same dark cloaks and rose crests – Thorne's Deceit's guild mark. Though members of Blue Pegasus and Lamia Scale were still fighting against the members of Thorne's Deceit that were scattered about the town, Fairy Tail was still looking for Lucy.

For hours they'd been trying to find her. Every street, every ruin, every alley; all empty. She wasn't screaming and she was nowhere to be found.

Bickslow's panic was mounting the longer it took, much like everyone else's – especially her team's.

He paced back and forth the area they'd gathered in. They'd borrowed Sherria and the young God Slayer and Dragon Slayer were busy healing those who needed it, which included Erza and Natsu. Everyone had seen better days – much better days – but they couldn't split up again and search for the blonde in the shape they were. It was just too dangerous.

But Bickslow was honestly getting impatient. He needed to find her; he needed to believe that she was still there. Somewhere. But the longer it took, the less he believed.

Finally, they all split up and head in separate directions and they were back to scouring the town and putting the odd Thorne's Deceit member unconscious. For the most part, the other two guilds had that under control now.

A scream tore through the crisp air and everyone froze. They hadn't heard her for hours, and honestly, they were thankful for the horrific scream. From wherever they were in the town at the time, they ran in the direction the scream had come from. They pushed through their own pain and tiredness, just because they needed to save Lucy. She was part of their dysfunctional family and that's just what it meant to be in Fairy Tail – to save one another _because_ they were a family.

Bickslow had been the first to emerge from the dark alley and before he could even react to what he saw in the town square, he felt a pressure on his back and then he was a foot above the ground and heading towards the rows of chairs in front of the immaculate fountain.

"No… Bicks!" Lucy cried as she watched the Seith mage get forced into the chairs in front of her, chains shooting up from the ground in black smoke to wrap around his arms and legs, chaining him to the chair. Over and over it happened – with Laxus, Freed, Evergreen, Gajeel, Levy, and finally Pantherlily. Each of them struggling with their chains and trying to break free.

She didn't understand why any of them were there. They shouldn't have been there. They should all be back at the guild, enjoying their night… not watching her die. None of them should have had to witness that, least of all Bickslow.

A wicked grin spread across Thorne's face as he looked over the group, then to Natasha. "It seems we've drawn a crowd."

"Indeed!" She replied with her own wicked grin, "Is it time to start yet?"

"No no, there's more of them here. They're all going to see it." Thorne proclaimed. Then, walking closer to the fountain, he raised his arm again, "But it seems your screaming is drawing them in. Who would have thought their own kin would be the bait?"

And with that, Lucy threw her head back again, squeezing her eyes shut as the pain ran through every single cell in her body.

Everyone grimaced at the sound, all trying to fight the chains. Bickslow dropped his head, looking down at his lap as she screamed. Over and over. It didn't stop like it had before. They were torturing her – hell, they were torturing _him_.

Everything was so much worse than he'd thought.

"Let her go." Bickslow mumbled through gritted teeth, still looking down. He couldn't look up. He couldn't watch Lucy be in pain.

Thorne turned, giving Lucy another reprieve as he walked over to Bickslow, forcing his head up. "What was that?" He asked quietly.

"I said, let her go." Bickslow said clearly.

"Bicks, stop it…" Lucy whispered. She didn't want Bickslow to get hurt because of her. Even if it would be the last thing she did before she died, she'd find a way to make sure of it.

Natasha shot up from her throne, looking between the two quickly before another grin spread across her face. "Oh! Don't tell me you two are in love?" She drawled, laughing when neither answered. "How marvellous!" She exclaimed, then, she was leaning over in front of Bickslow, the tip of a jagged blade pressed under his chin, "Not only will you see your precious little girlfriend die to this very blade, but you'll know just what it feels like to have something you love taken away from you which is exactly what you did to me." Natasha said quietly.

Bickslow hadn't been listening to a word she said, to be honest. He'd been too busy looking past Natasha and Thorne, because just on the other side of town centre, Natsu and the rest of his team had emerged from another street. Still battered and bruised, but they were smart enough not to come running in like he had. Bickslow had to give him that, at least.

But Bickslow had a chance to do something. Their focus was him completely, and they'd failed to notice the way his babies had been hovering a few feet above them the entire time. If he could create a distraction and force Thorne and Natasha to lose their focus entirely, then Lucy wouldn't be stuck against the fountain and maybe, just maybe, the rest of his team would be able to break their chains.

 _Yeah, I can do that_ , he thought.

Bickslow knew Natsu was listening, and he knew that he was waiting. Natsu was waiting for something to happen – for an opening, and Natsu knew that Bickslow was going to give him that opening. He just had to wait for it.

The corner of Bickslow's mouth lifted up into a small smirk, much to Natasha's curiosity as she raised an eyebrow at the Seith mage.

"Get 'em, babies." He said, and before the father and daughter duo could react, the five dolls had dived down on them, shooting blast after blast at them that had them surrounded in smoke from the shots that hit the ground, and in their confusion, they'd lost all of their focus.

Thorne's control on Lucy was lost, the fountain had returned to its original, destroyed state, and the chairs and chains were gone.

* * *

 **Well... it was originally supposed to be in one chapter, but I think splitting it up works better.**

 **As usual, I apologise for any errors. There's always some that slip through when I read it again but more often than not, I'll have the chapter updated within 24 hours to fix any mistakes. For whatever reason, I find it easier to catch them if I read it on my phone rather than in word/on a computer. It's weird, I know.**

 **Again, I'm not sure when I'll get the next chapter up. I really need to start working on this assignment and get caught up with all of the stuff I've missed (didn't go to uni for the last two days... again). Thank god for lecture recordings.**

 **Please remember to leave a review if you can! I love reading them, even if they're just a few words.**

 **Anyway, time for me to go to bed, so I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **Until next time.**

 **\- April**


	32. Chapter 32

**You guys... I know I'm making it hard for you, and I apologise. I promise the pain is almost over! ;)**

 **Anyway, I got my assignment finished this morning (only worth 10% since it's small so I'm not too worried if I completely fuck it up... which is completely likely) so I was able to reward myself by finishing this chapter hehe.**

 **Hope you enjoy!**

* * *

Lucy fell to the ground with a short cry having landed on the broken fragments of the original fountain. She tried pushing herself up, only to have her arms give out whenever she put any pressure on them. Her wrists were stinging from where the ropes had been on them earlier, her back hurt from where it had been pressed into the columns or the fountain. Everything hurt – still.

It was like the pain had never truly left her that time. It was excruciating, but it was there. It was enough to make her want to close her eyes and just scream from the frustration of it. She just wanted it all to be over. It had gone on for too long.

Slowly, she managed to pull herself up, gritting her teeth through the pain. Every muscle, bone, cell – they all still hurt. When she turned to look at the chaos in front her, she wanted to scream. But she couldn't. Her throat was raw.

Thorne's hand was wrapped around Bickslow's throat as he held him up in the air, the Seith mage's hands wrapped around Thorne's arm. With all the chaos around them – Erza and Laxus chasing Natasha as the rest dealt with the 'minions' that had emerged from almost every single street leading to the town square, things between the two seemed almost civil.

Before Lucy could see what was going to happen next, Happy and Carla had swooped down, picking her up and lifting her up before flying away from the mess in the centre of the town. Even though she wanted to stay – she wanted to help, she knew she couldn't. She didn't have her keys, her whip – nothing. She was in too much pain to be of any help and she was too weak in that moment. She knew that.

The tears rolled down her cheeks as she closed her eyes.

 _Please be okay, everyone… Bickslow…_

Because if anything happened to any of them, she wouldn't be able to forgive herself.

* * *

Bickslow grinned when the two Exceeds lifted the blonde off to safety, most likely taking her to either Wendy or Sherria, he figured. He'd done exactly what he'd wanted to do – caused enough of a distraction to create an opening for her to get out. Lucy was going to be okay and that's all that mattered.

Thorne snarled at the grinning Seith mage he was holding up. It was _him_ who had caused all of the trouble they were in then, and boy, was he going to pay for it. The blonde didn't matter anymore to Thorne. The idiot in his hand would be enough.

With a flick of his wrist, he'd let his grip on Bickslow's throat lessen and tossed him into the same column Lucy had been pressed against earlier. "You fairies never learn, do you?" He growled, walking towards the still grinning Seith mage, though it was wavering. He walked through the blasts from Bickslow's souls like they were nothing.

"Part of being a member of Fairy Tail." Bickslow shot back.

"Not for much longer." Thorne said with his own malicious grin. With another flick of his wrist, Bickslow's head went back as he tried to hold back his scream.

Bickslow had always had a high pain tolerance – hell, Loke had sent him flying across half the town once and he'd been able to walk it off… a week later, that is. But the pain that coursed through him then was on a whole new level. He'd never felt anything like it before.

When he couldn't hold back his scream any longer and let it rip from his throat, so much anger coursed right through him. It was Thorne who had made Lucy scream like that. It was Thorne who had hurt her, made her feel pain like she'd never experienced, to Bickslow, that hurt him more than anything. He couldn't even begin to imagine just how much pain she'd been in, especially when to Bickslow, it was worse than anything he'd experience. To Lucy, it would have been worse; much, much worse.

"Fuck… you…" Bickslow ground out, breathing heavily when the pain diminished, "You're gonna get thrown back in jail… with that bitch you call a daughter."

Thorne snapped. His eyes darkening even more as she stormed towards the Seith mage, then, with his hand outstretched, he swung his arm to the side and Bickslow was sent in that direction, flying through the air and through a semi-destroyed wall.

He'd landed on a pile of rubble, and with a groan he tried to push himself up, only to cry out in pain when he tried to move. He lifted his head, looking down and slowly with one hand, he moved his cloak out of the way and he grimaced at the piece of bloodied steel piercing him. Bickslow had landed on piles of bricks and old pieces of sheet metal they used for some of the rooves, apparently. The large piece was sticking in on an angle – from his back and coming out across his stomach and side.

He couldn't move.

Thorne's heavy footsteps accompanied by the sound of his laughter was heard as Bickslow lifted his head again, glaring at the guild master as he stepped through the hole in the wall.

"Well," He chuckled, moving to stand in front of the injured Seith mage. "So this is what happens when fairies fly, huh?"

He lifted his hand again, balling it into a fist as Bickslow threw his head back again, falling his own hands into fists as he screamed, probably loud enough for anyone across the town to hear. The pain in his side from the metal was getting exponentially worse the longer Thorne used his magic.

And then he stopped, another chuckle as Bickslow panted, gritting his teeth. Each breath he took was hurting.

Thorne turned, heading for the hole in the wall again, "I _was_ going to make your death quick; an act of kindness, if you may…" He grinned, "but this is so much better. You'll die a slow and painful death, listening to the cries of your beloved fairies."

"The only ones who are dying are you and your kid." Bickslow spat, wincing slightly. Eternal life in prison wasn't going to be good enough for those two, not after what they did. Never.

When Thorne walked away chuckling, Bickslow looked back down to the metal that was piercing him through and through. He could feel where it was going in and he could feel exactly where it was coming out. Every inch of it.

With a grimace, he tried to lift himself up, to get himself off it, perhaps. Another scream ripped through him when he tried moving and he knew for certain that there was no way he was getting out of that one.

But… he was okay, in a way. He knew the rest of his team and the guild would get Thorne and Natasha and send their asses back to prison (or kill them, who knew), and they'd all be okay. Lucy would be okay and that's all that mattered.

Raising an arm, he unclipped his visor and pushed the hood back, tossing the smaller piece of metal away as he stared up at the sky, the roof having collapsed and instead leaving the gaping hole.

Above him were stars – thousands of thousands of them. Bickslow had grown fond of looking at the stars since dating Lucy. He could remember when she'd looked up at them after their first date and he'd wondered how anyone could find an almost blank sky entertaining. But slowly, he began to enjoy it. It was peaceful – relaxing.

And, in a way, he could forget everything bad or frustrating that was going on when he looked up at the stars. The stars reminded him of Lucy, and Lucy had always made him feel like that. There didn't have to be a million stars out like there was that night, there just had to be one. One single star was all Bickslow needed to think of Lucy, and when he did, a lazy smile made its home on his face.

Through the pain, he could smile, because he knew that the woman he loved was going to be fine and that's all that mattered.

* * *

Lucy watched as the Rune Knights escorted the last members of Thorne's Deceit into the multiple transport carriages that had lined up in the destroyed town square. All around her were injured people – most of them her friends and family, each of them getting treated by either Wendy or Sherria or those from the Rune Knights.

She looked down to the bandages around her wrists and then to the one around her thigh from where she had a cut from landing on the broken pieces of the fountain.

Everything was over. The pain was gone and Thorne's Deceit was finally going to be a thing of the past. Everyone was finally able to go home and get the rest they all deserved. After all, it had been a long day and they were all exhausted.

Happy and Carla had found her keys in amongst some rubble a few streets over when everyone had still been in the midst of battle, and as soon as she'd touched the familiar leather pouch, she hugged them close to her, a sigh of relief escaping her lips when she felt that every single key was intact – including Loke's. It didn't explain why the lion spirit had been unable to help her, but it didn't matter. They were all safe, and that's what was important.

She looked down to where Natsu was sitting on the ground just next to her, his arm getting bandaged by one of the many Rune Knights running about. The guy was covered in bandages, just like he was after almost ever job.

Just like Erza, Natsu was feeling guilty. He'd been there the last time the guild had been a problem, but neither of them had recognised the name that time around. They felt like it was their fault – everyone had gotten hurt because of them, and undoubtedly, Lucy had been through the worst of them all and it was their fault. Or so they thought, anyway.

But Lucy wasn't having any of that – not one bit. She didn't want her family to feel guilty over what was essentially something that shouldn't have happened. Lucy knew that they weren't the only one who were feeling guilt. Mira had come running up to her and wrapped her arms around her as soon as she'd come back to the square with Wendy when she was able to walk on her own.

Eventually, the last of the Rune Knights left, leaving just the legal guilds as they gathered up all of their members, getting ready to call it a night head back to their own homes. Everything was done and everyone was okay.

Lucy's heart sank when the five familiar totems that belonged to only one person zoomed out from an alley and hovered just before her. Bickslow's babies _rarely_ got too far away from him, but when Lucy's eyes went over the dark town square, she started to panic. Bickslow wasn't there, and he never had been. She'd only just noticed.

"Lucy! Lucy!" The dolls chanted.

"Huh? Babies? Where's Bickslow?" She asked, her voice trembling slightly.

And then they all spun around and headed back into the alley they'd come from. They wanted her to follow them, and that was exactly what Lucy was going to do because she knew they'd lead her to Bickslow, and more than anything, she hoped that he was okay. Bickslow had to be okay.

When she saw Bickslow lying on top of the pile of rubble, barely moving and barely breathing, the tears started streaming down her face and a garbled cry left her through as she ran over to his side, kneeling down on top of the rubble.

"Oh God… B-Bicks…" She cried, her hands shaking in front of her. She looked down to see the large piece of metal sticking through his side – the width as long as her forearm. Her hands went her mouth, just because she didn't know where else to put them. She didn't want to touch him because she didn't want to hurt him.

Bickslow slowly opened his eyes and he breathed a sigh of relief, followed by a grimace from the pain. Lucy was actually okay – she was alive. "You're okay?" He whispered.

" _Me?!_ Y-you're asking me I-I'm okay? W-what about you?" She spluttered, mentally cursing herself when she realised just how stupid a question it was. _He's got a piece of metal sticking through him! Of course he's not okay!_

"Been better." Bickslow said with a grin, chuckling slightly before he had to stop to groan in pain when Lucy shook his head at him.

Even though he was smiling, Lucy knew he was still in pain. A lot of pain. But he was trying to hide it from her and she didn't want him to do that. She didn't want him to be in pain at all, but she didn't know what she could do about it.

Bickslow's grin faltered when he looked up to the stars once again, briefly forgetting the pain and what he knew was going to happen, inevitably. "You know," He whispered, turning his head back to face Lucy, her head still down as she tears fell to the rubble. "At least I can say I'll love you until the day I die." Because Bickslow was a smart guy – occasionally. He was smart enough to know that this was the end for him.

He wasn't looking forward to it, but he wasn't scared of dying. Not when he was going to be able to spend the last moments of his life with the love of his life right there next to him. Honestly, there were worse ways to go.

Neither heard the muffled cry from Levy or how both of their teams had gathered where there used to be a wall, but whether Bickslow and Lucy knew they were there was irrelevant. Neither cared and for once, their friends weren't going to interrupt. They knew better than to do that.

Lucy had the urge to slap Bickslow then as she looked up, but she couldn't. Not when she saw his face – nothing but pain and total honesty. No smiles, smirks, or grins. Without taking a second to think about, she took his face in her small hands and leant over him, making sure not to disturb the metal, and pressed her lips to his. When she choked on a sob, she pulled back and looked his straight in the eyes, neither caring that her tears falling on his face.

"No," She choked, "You don't get to do that, Bickslow. You don't get to just sit there and make jokes, pretending like everything is okay."

"Lucy-"

"No, Bickslow. Listen to me," Lucy interrupted, raising her voice slightly. "You can't sit there and act like everything would be okay if you left like this; like everyone would be able to move on. It's not fair. You can't do that to me, especially not after everything we've been through already."

Bickslow could only nod once. He couldn't talk, because he didn't know what to say. He'd never expected it to be easy for anyone, because hell, it had been hard enough for him to admit it to himself earlier, but there was still nothing he could do. To Bickslow, there were always some things that couldn't be healed, and he believed that he was on of those things. He couldn't even move; how was he supposed to see a way of getting out of there and seeing the next day?

To Bickslow, it was simple. He wasn't going to. He was in too much pain to do anything, and he didn't know if that was from seeing Lucy distraught just over the mere thought of him dying, or if it was from the, well… giant piece of steel running through him. Probably a mix of both, he realised.

"Do you remember what I said this morning? When I was sitting on your back?" Lucy asked quietly, and when Bickslow raised an eyebrow in confusion at the subject, the corner of her mouth lifted up into a small smile. "You know, one day, I want to say that and not mean it as a joke." She whispered, pulling her bottom lip into her mouth. She was aware her face was as red as Erza's hair. After all, she'd pretty much just said she wanted to have kids with the guy one day and that was not something you talked about, not when you've only been dating for four and a half months.

"Shit, you've thought about that already?" Bickslow murmured, staring at her incredulously.

Something resembling half a laugh escaped her throat as she looked down at the Seith mage she loved, "I can't help it. I've thought about lots of things like that and whether that particular one happens or not, it doesn't really matter. I love you, Bicks, and you can't leave me. Not like this." She whispered, bringing her head down to rest her forehead on top of his.

Bickslow didn't know how to feel, honestly. He'd never really thought very far ahead in terms of their relationship, but Lucy had. On one hand he was overjoyed that she'd thought of a future where they were still together and she'd be pregnant and they'd be happy (which was honestly a little terrifying since he'd never really been too fond of the whole 'kids' concept). She saw _him_ in _their_ future, and that's when he realised it wasn't actually going to be their future. It wasn't going to exist, because he wasn't going to be there.

Bickslow, for the most part, was incredible stubborn and he always had been. There had always been a few people who could get him to see things differently, and Lucy was one of those, but then… he was set on believing that he was going to die that day. He just didn't see any other future for _himself_.

Slowly but surely, he was beginning to get scared. Bickslow rarely got scared. He was scared of what would happen after he died – was it possible to miss someone even though you're dead? Because if it was, he'd miss Lucy more than anything. Would he become a wandering soul and come under another Seith mage's manipulation? Who knew, because Bickslow surely didn't. He didn't know what there was to expect.

He was also scared of leaving Lucy, and if anything, that's what scared him the most. He'd be leaving her even though he never wanted to have to do that again.

There just wasn't anything he could do about it – as far as his mind could see, anyway.

Suddenly, Laxus was kneeling by Bickslow's feet and ripping off a strip of fabric from the skirt-like cloth. "Fuck this," He mumbled, then, walking over to Bickslow's side as the man looked back at him confusion, he leant down, balling up the fabric and shoving it into his mouth, "Bite down on it."

Bickslow was starting to panic. _What the fuck is he doing? Can't a guy just die in peace with his girlfriend? Is that too hard to ask?!_ He turned back to face Lucy just in time to see Erza pull her back, her arms wrapped around Lucy's to keep her in her grip as she struggled, and then Gajeel had taken her place on top of the rubble.

"What? What are you doing?!" Lucy shrieked, still trying to escape from Erza's grip. Despite being injured, the Requip mage was a lot stronger than she was.

Bickslow looked between the two Dragon Slayers as he felt their hands shifting to move under him, involuntarily biting down on the fabric when the move caused more pain in his side. _There's no fucking way they're doing that. Nope. Nope. Nope._

"Not letting your sorry ass die to a piece of metal." Gajeel muttered, and then, with a quick glance towards Laxus and a nod, they bent down further and in one swift movement, they'd pulled the Seith mage off at roughly the same angle he'd been impaled on.

If Bickslow had thought the pain from having a giant piece of steel running through his side and Thorne's magic was bad, he was wrong. Getting lifted from said piece of steel was so much worse.

He could only bite down on the fabric in his mouth to muffle his scream. He didn't even register the two Dragon Slayers moving him to a flat piece of ground – free from any sharp pieces of metal that he could be skewered on – because he was suddenly aware of just how much blood he'd lost. The rubble he'd been lying on was stained red and he felt like the room was spinning and it was hard to keep his eyes open. It was honestly a miracle he'd been alive at all, based on how much he'd lost.

But he couldn't even worry about that, because the next thing he knew, everything was black.

* * *

 **Aw, poor Bicks. I know I kind of skipped a whole bunch but... y'know... didn't really know what to write so I just didn't.**

 **As usual, I hope it was okay... any major errors should be fixed in the next 24 or so hours, as usual.**

 **Please remember to review/follow/favourite/fancy stuff that makes me love you!**

 **Until next time.**

 **\- April**


	33. Chapter 33

**You guys, you have no idea how hard it was for me to write the last few chapters. I was so close to just being like, 'fuck it! change of plans!'**  
 **But... I stuck it out, even though it was hard.**

 _ **DeathKitsune666 -** Like I said before, there's no cliffhanger in this one. I apologise for the last ones though hehe. _  
_**Raiza-chan -** I did it with great difficulty... but deal. Eventually? ;) _  
_**Swallowmysoul -** Thank you so much for your last few reviews. Honestly, I was going to try and space these chapters out (the whole Thorne's Deceit plot with the cliffhangers and all) just for the suspense... but I couldn't do that to anyone lol. And seriously, it means so much that you love it and you enjoy reading it! _  
_**Nikoneko123 -** And the same for you, thank you so so much. Whenever I see reviews saying they love this story, I melt a little inside and I get so happy, you have no idea. _

**I'm literally my own worst enemy when it comes to my work, so to all of you who read this (and to those who have been reading since the first few chapters), thank you all for sticking with me and to read when you guys say you like/love it and like reading it, I really do get incredibly happy. This fic really is my baby, and it's my first attempt at writing fanfic in 5+ years (from memory) so I wasn't expecting anywhere near the response this has gotten.**

 **Anyway, enough rambling. I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

They say that before you die, your life flashes before your eyes. That's exactly what happened to Bickslow.

After the unbearable pain and the darkness that seemed empty… he saw his life. Every moment and every detail; everything.

He saw himself running around a field with his parents and his sisters, laughing and screaming with joy. He could see himself annoying the living hell out of his sisters as he got older; they'd always be the target of his pranks. He saw himself sitting in front of the fire as his mother read her favourite book, time after time, and he saw himself on the floor reading his newest book on Seith magic.

He saw the way he shut himself off from the world and retreated into his self after his parents' death and how he had left what was left of his family just because he couldn't be there anymore. He'd taken his babies and walked away from it all.

He saw the day he joined Fairy Tail; Laxus telling him to get the guild mark on his tongue because the guy was getting fed up with his indecisiveness. He saw the day he finally got rid of his messy blue hair with the fringe that constantly got in his eyes that was basically the same as what Gray's hair was like and how Evergreen and Freed had given him the most disgusted look when he'd walked out, sporting the Mohawk he hadn't changed since. Laxus was really the only one who had liked it, and over time, Evergreen and Freed had come to like it.

He saw the day Laxus got him drunk and took him to a strip club, and well, that was the day Bickslow really became Bickslow. The future Elfman would have been proud, and he saw when he'd officially bought his apartment from his landlady because of noise complaints. If he'd owned it, they couldn't kick him out.

He saw himself sitting with his team on the anniversary of his parents' death the year after he'd joined the guild and how they'd all been there for him. They'd become his family, and he didn't need anyone else. That's just what it meant to be in a team; for all of them it was the same.

Every insignificant and significant moment and event from his life – he saw it all. Every job, every time Laxus electrocuted him, Evergreen hit him with her fan or turned him to stone, every time Freed trapped him in runes, and every time he made one of them walk into a wall or do something stupid.

He saw the day he met Lucy – the day he met the woman who was quite possibly the love of his life and would make him happier than he'd ever been. He saw the time he'd given her hell about Loke being in love with her – every time, actually.

He saw Tenrou Island, the time he got crushed by a herd of cows, and when they won the Grand Magic Games.

But… none of those were what Bickslow wanted to see. Because if he was going to see every moment of his life again and almost relive it, then he wanted to just get to the best parts – the last nearly five months.

If Bickslow could have smiled, he would have.

He saw the time Lucy had fallen asleep on his shoulder on the train and then how they'd gotten covered in mud and were soaking wet. He saw when they woke up, accidentally curled up together and honestly, to that day, it was still Bickslow's favourite way he'd ever woken up.

He saw the first time he'd kissed her and when he finally gathered the courage to ask her out on a date.

And suddenly, he felt like it had all been put on fast forward. He wasn't watching every single moment he'd spent with Lucy, even though that's all he wanted to see. Those were the memories he would always cherish, because he was happy. She made him happy and up until that point, they'd been the best moments of his entire life.

But he wasn't watching them again. He was watching her scream in pain and then he saw her tears when she was hovering over him, telling him that he wasn't allowed to leave her because she wanted him to be in her future – _their_ future.

And then… everything was black. He was staring at darkness that surrounded him. There was nothing there – no pain, no hope, nothing. It was just empty.

That's just all there was to his life. He'd seen and relived every single moment and now there was no more. Bickslow could feel himself slipping into the darkness, slowly. It was like he was falling – that feeling you get when you're drifting off to sleep sometimes. In a way, it had always comforted him, and it was weird. He could never explain it.

Maybe dying was exactly like that falling feeling when you're falling asleep? Maybe once you've reached the end of it all, you just… fall. Until you fall asleep? No, until you're dead? Who knows.

Bickslow was going to embrace it. After all, it had always comforted him, so why wouldn't it then? The last months of his life had undoubtedly been the absolute best. He wouldn't even try to argue that, just because he had no reason to. He had no reason to try and tell himself that Lucy hadn't made his life better, because without a doubt, she had.

But then… Bickslow wasn't falling anymore, and he was confused. He didn't understand – he'd seen everything in his life, so what was he looking at? That was supposed to be the end.

He looked around. He was in a park – the one in the centre of Magnolia. But… it was different. _Something_ was different but he couldn't tell what.

And then he heard her unmistakable laugh and he turned. _What the fuck…?_ He wasn't reliving everything like he had been, he was like a bystander, almost.

He was watching himself chase her around the park, each with wide grins on their faces as they laughed, before he caught her from behind, his arms wrapping around her waist before falling down to the soft grass. He turned at the sound of more laughter and saw two children running up – one boy and one girl, both with blue hair. He watched them pile on top of the grinning and laughing Bickslow and Lucy on the grass, and he could only watch what he realised was a happy family in silence. It was supposed to be _his_ family.

Bickslow stepped forward slowly, feeling like he needed to see their faces. Hell, if they were supposed to be his kids, he wanted to see who they looked like more – probably Lucy, he thought. But as soon as he took that first step, everything started to rewind. He wasn't moving – everything around him was. Everything he'd just seen was playing backwards, changing around him as he stood perfectly still, watching every moment fly by.

He was standing in the infirmary, all of his friends and family – hell, half the guild – around them. He watched himself sit down on the edge of the bed Lucy was sitting up in, holding their newborn baby in his arms as they both smiled down at the baby. Bickslow could see so much love and happiness in each of their faces – in his face, and he could feel his chest start to hurt.

He wasn't going to get to experience any of that. He wasn't going to get to live that life with Lucy, and it was the first time he realised that that was exactly the life he wanted. With her.

And then everything was changing again – rewinding. He'd catch quick glimpses of things as everything around him changed. He'd seen Lucy sitting on his back for a second before he'd rolled and tackled her to the bed, and he'd seen them arguing over what colour to paint the nursery.

But they were just quick glimpses – snippets of the life he wasn't going to get to live.

He was back in the forest in Cartervale – the same town where everything had started. Except they weren't covered in mud and soaking wet. The blue sky could be seen between the dense foliage above them, barely.

He was proposing, and when Lucy squealed before wrapping her arms around his neck, shouting 'yes' over and over, Bickslow couldn't help but smile. Even though he wasn't going to experience her joy first hand, it was nice to see it. Because if he'd actually been able to live that life, she'd agree to marry him. She'd agree to spending the rest of her life with him, over anyone else.

When it started changing again, he didn't know what to expect, not until they'd stopped. He didn't know what else there was to see because he felt like he'd seen all of the things that were going to be the hardest to accept he was never going to experience.

But when it finally stopped, he realised that none of those mattered as much as what he was looking at. It was silly, really. They were curled up on his bed under the sheets – her in the grey and pink shirt she'd basically stolen and Bickslow sprawled on his stomach like he usually was.

It was the simple things that were the most difficult to accept sometimes, and for the first time, Bickslow could understand that. It wasn't the fact he was never going to get to propose, to marry her, to have kids with her, to have a life with her; it was just that he wouldn't get to be with her. He wouldn't be able to wake up to her cold feet pressed against his back and he wasn't going to be able to wake up with her again at all.

Nothing like that was going to happen again, because he'd reached his end.

When he turned and saw the closed door behind him, he knew that that was the end, somehow. He'd been through every single moment of his life and then the future that he was missing out on.

Even though Bickslow had always been a stubborn person, he knew he couldn't stand there forever. Because the longer he stayed and thought about the things he was never going to experience, the less likely he'd be accepting it.

He needed things to be over before it started hurting too much.

So with a weak smile at himself and Lucy fast asleep, he turned and reached out for the door. His fingers wrapped around the handle, twisting it slowly, and with a final glance towards the bed, he pulled the door open and walked back into the darkness.

It was the end for Bickslow.

Well, that's just what he assumed, anyway.

* * *

For an entire week, Lucy stayed by Bickslow's side for almost the entire time – only going home when she got kicked out of the infirmary and told to go and get some rest herself. For a week, she waited for him to wake up, and it was the longest week of her life. After Laxus and Gajeel had lifted him from the steel that had pierced him through and through, he'd passed out from the pain and after that, Porlyusica had given him something to _keep_ him out.

Because if he was awake or at least semi-conscious, he was going to be in unbearable pain and no one wanted that for Bickslow, nor did they want Lucy to witness it.

So for a week he just lay there, the slight rise and fall of his chest the only thing that proved he was still alive, and each day was harder than the last because he was supposed to be awake. It wasn't supposed to be for a week, yet for whatever reason, it had been.

When they'd all returned to the guild in the middle of the night, Porlyusica was already there and so was Makarov. Lucy had been kicked out of the room and her team had dragged her home and told her not to go back to the guild until the morning because she needed her rest.

As much as she hated them in that moment, she knew they were right. She needed to eat, have a shower, and sleep.

But she couldn't sleep. No matter how much she tried, she just couldn't drift off to sleep.

So what was she to do? She couldn't go back to the guild and be by Bickslow's side and she couldn't sleep in her own bed. She went to Bickslow's apartment, that's what. Lucy spent more than half of her time there anyway, but it still felt weird being there when he wasn't there.

When she eventually curled up in his bed, her grey and pink shirt on, she could only stare at the empty space that Bickslow should have been in. Without thinking, she'd grabbed one of the pillows he usually used and pulled it in, her arms wrapping around it as she buried her face in it.

Lucy had always loved the way Bickslow smelled, since the first time he'd let her wear his cloak. It had changed over time, but she still loved it. It was warm, spicy, and a little sweet – it was everything Bickslow was, really. He'd always had that sweet, caring, loving side to him and that's one of the things Lucy loved about him. Under all of his jokes and somewhat-brash personality, he was an incredibly kind person.

But she'd barely been able to get any sleep at Bickslow's either. An hour or two at most, but at least it was something.

When morning came around and she headed for the guild as soon as she could, she realising that Bickslow's babies had been following her the entire time. They'd been hovering behind her ever since they'd led her to Bickslow, and it confused her a little. She'd expected them to stay by Bickslow the entire time, because that's what they usually did when they were actually out, but they weren't.

They were following her.

No echoing, just following.

And it wasn't like she didn't appreciate it, because she did. It felt like Bickslow was still there, and mentally, Lucy cursed herself. She was already acting like Bickslow was dead. He wasn't. He was alive.

And he was going to be fine.

She had to believe that. She _needed_ to believe that - because if Bickslow wasn't fine, she didn't know what she would do. She honestly didn't think she'd be able to cope with his death, especially when she thought she was the reason he got hurt in the first place. If she hadn't been there, he wouldn't be lying on the infirmary bed.

When she got to the guild, she didn't even bother with talking to anyone. She wasn't there for them – she was there for Bickslow. The first thing Porlyusica had said when she'd walked through those doors was that he was an incredibly lucky man – not a single organ was perforated by the steel and she suspected that it had missed by mere millimetres. Any other angle and everything would be completely different.

But… he still should have been dead. He'd been lying there on that rubble for over an hour and it was both a miracle and a mystery that he hadn't died from blood loss.

So each night, she'd go back to Bickslow's apartment in hopes of getting just a little bit of sleep even though she'd rather be sitting in the guild watching over him, but they wouldn't let her do that.

She'd brought the huge book on Seith magic with her that night and she'd sat up in his bed with the book resting on his pillow in her lap and the babies settled on the bed around her. When she looked at them, it was almost as if they were watching over _her_ , and God, did she feel like she needed that. She needed Bickslow, but he couldn't be there, so his babies were.

So with a sigh, she'd flicked open to the chapter she'd been dreading reading – what happens when a Seith mage dies.

' _In some ways, the wandering souls that a Seith mage are able to control can be compared to the spirits that a Celestial Spirit mage holds contracts with. In this sense, the souls are believed to see the Seith mage as their master. Much like spirits, it is believed that souls are able to sense their master's forthcoming death, and, if it is 'inevitable', they will relinquish any remaining tethers to their 'bodies' and master, and will once again become a wandering soul that is able to be caught by a Seith mage, should they be found by one.'_

So… that would mean that Bickslow had to fine. Right? Because if he wasn't going to get better and wake up, then the babies wouldn't be there.

But they were there, and that was the entire point. They were giving Lucy hope, so it was really just a matter of waiting for Bickslow to wake up.

By the third night, Lucy couldn't sleep again. The pillow, the babies – hell, she'd even taken to wearing one of the shirts he actually wore occasionally, but nothing helped. Porlyusica said he was supposed to be awake after a couple of days… but he wasn't.

So when she couldn't sleep, she cleaned. Every single shelf and surface was dusted and sparkling clean by the time she was done. Every pillow on the lounge was perfectly placed and each throw blanket was folded precisely. Every paper on his desk had been stacked up in the corner on top of the books and the bookcase had been organised alphabetically, with the assistance of the babies when she couldn't reach the top shelves. Every cupboard, cabinet, and drawer in his kitchen and bathroom was cleaned out and she'd even had Capricorn fix the curtain-rod for the shower that Bickslow had yet to get fixed.

By the fourth night, no one even bothered telling her to go home and get some rest, not when she had fallen asleep in the chair next to his bed, her feet tucked up under her and her head resting on the armrest with the babies on her lap. They just didn't see the point of getting her to go home because they all knew she wasn't sleeping.

And that's how it went for the next few nights, with Lucy only going back to her own place to shower and change, occasionally getting something to eat from Mira when the barmaid brought it in. People came and went all day – Wendy and Porlyusica to check on his healing progress (which was actually doing quite well thanks to the young Dragon Slayer), or everyone else just to check on how Lucy was doing, because out of everyone, she was the one who was the most worried about Bickslow. But that wasn't to say they weren't worried about Bickslow, because they were. Everyone was, just because no one liked seeing their friend and member of their family in such a state.

But during her week, even though she hated every second of it just because Bickslow wasn't waking up, she began to see that his babies really were similar to her spirits. And it wasn't like she'd never made that connection, because she had. She'd always thought they'd reminded her of her spirits and that was long before they'd started dating, but with them following her around, she saw it more clearly.

Like her spirits, they were her friends. Bickslow never had them out much so she'd never been able to watch them, but they'd been out the entire time, not able to leave the dolls that he had them in, because without his magic, they couldn't change over and the dolls themselves couldn't be sent to his 'toy box', as he liked to call it.

But it wasn't until she'd actually read a passage from the Seith magic book that she truly saw how similar souls were to spirits.

' _In most cases, the souls under the manipulation of a Seith mage are not able to act of their own accord – that is, everything will be the wish of their master, the Seith mage. In other words, the soul's magic is solely reliant of that of their master. However, in some cases, where a bond of deep enough meaning has been struck between a soul and a Seith mage, they are able to act of their own accord. Their power draws on that of the Seith mage and so occasionally, there are times when they can harness their own power and act against the wishes of the Seith mage – that is, they can act of their accord._

' _As mentioned before, there are many ways in which souls can be compared to the spirits of the Celestial Spirit World. In this sense, it is the bonds between that of a Seith mage and his/her souls and a Celestial Spirit mage and his/her spirits. Spirits who are able to force their gates open and use their own magic rather than their master's are ones that share deep bonds, and so, this can be said the same for souls and Seith mages._

' _As also mentioned before, when a Seith mage is on the brink of death, the souls under his/her manipulation will in fact sense this and if there is no other possible outcome – saving grace, perhaps – then they will forfeit their bodies and return to being wandering souls._

' _That being said, when a Seith mage is gravely injured and the souls do not see death in their master's foreseeable future, they have been known to 'comfort' those who are close to the Seith mage. However, this will only happen if the bonds between the Seith mage and the souls are strong enough, as well as between the Seith mage and the person in need of comfort. It is most commonly a loved one or a relative that the souls are drawn to._

' _It is important to remember that souls were once humans and so when they act of their own accord in attempt to comfort someone, we can see it as their once human nature emerging. Also like spirits, souls of this calibre are seen to be as protective entities to not only their master but those close to them.'_

So to Lucy, it wasn't just that they knew Bickslow was going to get better – eventually – but they also really were a lot like her spirits. Bickslow obviously had deep enough bonds with his souls for them to spend an entire week on their own power, and when it had elaborated on souls doing that in a later chapter, it had stated that it was incredibly rare for it to occur longer than two-three days.

But it had been for a week. They'd been trying to comfort Lucy for a week _because_ Bickslow loved her, and them being around her was in an attempt to tell her that everything was going to get better. Bickslow was going to get better.

So with all of the differences that they had between them, Lucy and Bickslow had something in common, and that was the bond they shared between their souls and spirits.

But maybe that was made their entire relationship work out in the first place. Maybe it was because they were almost complete opposites and that they were almost always having to find a constant middle ground, but it wasn't like that was hard either. Because if they were too similar then it would be boring. There'd be no fun involved… and if a relationship wasn't fun, then what was the point?

Neither had thought about it much, because neither really wanted to question it. Some things were just better left answered, and maybe the reason as to why they were both so happy with each other was one of those things.

* * *

It was a week after everyone had returned after the events in Larch Town did Bickslow finally wake up.

His eyes fluttered open slowly, squinting at the harsh light in the room and giving his eyes a minute to adjust. After all, they'd been closed for an entire week. Once his eyes had adjusted, he looked around the room, seeing all of the empty beds around him.

 _The guild?_

It didn't make any sense. He was supposed to be dead. He'd seen his entire life and the future he was going to miss out on. He wasn't supposed to be there.

 _Unless it was a dream?_

Bickslow tried to sit up slowly, only to groan in pain before he fell back down to the bed. _Right, totally forgot about that happening,_ he thought. With one arm, he lifted up the sheet covering him from his chest down, grimacing when he saw the white bandages wrapped around his abdomen. He could feel the pain radiating from his side – his back was strangely okay. It was nowhere as bad as it had been the last time he could remember anything, but it still hurt. A lot.

And then he saw the blonde. She had her head leaning on her folded arms on the side of the bed, sleeping. At that point, Bickslow still wasn't sure if what he'd seen had been a dream, if he was dreaming in that current moment, or if he was actually dead. He was still confused.

He didn't need to know what it was to remember that he'd never been able to wake her. There'd been times where he'd wanted to, but he could just never bring himself to do it. She always looked too peaceful when she was asleep, and more often than not, the corners of her mouth would be upturned just the tiniest bit and she'd be smiling slightly. He loved it. He thought it was adorable, always had

But he didn't have to wake her, it seemed, because his babies that he didn't know had been under her head and in her arms were waking her up for him.

"Lucy! Lucy!" The cheered quietly, moving about in the incredibly tight space as best they could.

Lucy slowly pushed herself up, rubbing her eyes with the backs of her hands as the five dolls zoomed out and flew about the room. She was still too groggy to realise their usual enthusiasm and energy was back, nor did she realise why they'd woken her up, because they hadn't done that in the entire week they'd been with her.

But when her gaze trailed up to Bickslow's face like it did every time she woke up, she honestly hadn't expected to see him actually looking back at her – sure, a little confused looking, but _awake_.

Within seconds, she was a blubbering mess as she shot up from the chair, her arms wrapping around his neck as she buried her face in the pillow just next to his head. "T-thank God y-you're a-awake," She stammered, "I-I was so w-worried."

Bickslow couldn't help but wrap his arms around her back. He didn't care about the pain that came from pulling her down to him; he just needed to hold her as close as possible. "This is real?" He mumbled into her shoulder.

"It's r-real." She said, turning to press a kiss to his cheek.

He could feel his heart practically leap into his throat, hearing the words. It wasn't a dream and he wasn't dead, though he was still confused. It was real. He was really there and she was really there.

Closing his eyes, he wrapped his arms around her even more. The pain didn't matter. "I love you so much."

Lucy choked on her sobs, lifting her head just enough to wipe the tears from her face before leaning back down, her lips crashing down on his as she took the sides of his face in her hands. Even though she knew deep down that he really would be okay one day, she'd been beginning to think she would never hear Bickslow say those words again. That fact she'd thought that was worrying enough in its own right, but she didn't need to worry about it anymore. He was okay and she didn't have to worry about when he'd wake up.

"Don't you e-ever leave me like t-that again," She whispered, leaning her forehead on his when they pulled away slightly. "A week, Bicks. I was w-worried sick about you for a week."

Bickslow furrowed his brow slightly. "A week?" He asked. _Was I really dreaming for an entire week…?_

Lucy nodded, a small frown on her face. "You were asleep for a week even though you should have woken up after a couple of days."

"Oh…" He murmured. "I'm sorry, Lucy." Because unintentionally, he'd left her for an entire week. He didn't want to do that. Ever.

"I'm the one who should be saying sorry…" She mumbled, sitting up suddenly and moving to sit on the edge of the bed before looking down at her hands. "It's… it was my fault you were there. If I didn't get c-caught then you wouldn't have been there and you w-wouldn't be hurt and you w-wouldn't have nearly d-died, so I'm s-sorry…" She whispered, the tears rolling down her cheeks once again.

Bickslow winced slightly as he pushed himself up to lean on his elbows. "It's not your fault," He said with a slight smirk, and when she turned and opened her mouth as if to say it was again, he cut her off. "I called the guy's daughter a bitch and he lost it. It was just bad luck that he happened to toss me into the building with the broken pieces of metal…"

The corner of her mouth lifted into a small smile for just a second. It was so Bickslow's type of thing to insult someone and get hurt from it. But… she still felt guilty. "Well, even so… you're really lucky, Bicks. Had that piece of metal gone in on any other angle… you'd have d-died… a-and you lost s-so much blood…" She whispered, trailing off when she really couldn't talk about it anymore. She was still having a hard time forgetting the image of Bickslow lying there on the rubble.

Bickslow hated seeing Lucy like that. He hated seeing her crying and he hated the fact that it was over himself.

"Alright, come over here." He said, wincing when he moved over on the small bed and patted the empty spot next time – on the side that he hadn't had a piece of giant metal sticking through him, of course.

When she curled up against his side with his arm around her, she sighed quietly. "Please d-don't even come close to leaving like that a-again. Or leaving at all." She whispered. Because for every single future scenario her brain had thought of, Bickslow was in all of them. She didn't want to have to be without Bickslow again. Not any time soon, anyway.

And even though the details of what Bickslow realised was a dream the entire time were fading and he could barely remember them at all, he knew that he'd seen a future – a future that he now knew he wanted. It was a future he'd never even expected to want, but with Lucy, that was exactly what he wanted. Whether it happened exactly like he'd seen in his dream or not, as long as he got to spend his life with her and have a family with her, he'd be happy, and more than anything, he hoped that that's what she wanted too.

"I won't." He whispered.

* * *

 **Yay! Happy Bicks and Lucy again!**

 **Anyway, I hope this made up for all of the chaos in the last few chapters and that you enjoyed it (and possibly made you hate me a little less for almost killing Bickslow... but come on, I could never do that. I'd curl up into a ball and cry myself to sleep if I ever saw anyone do that, let alone actually write it myself).**

 **Until next time!**

 **\- April**


	34. Chapter 34

**Four days without an update?! Wow. I think that's a new record with the way I've been getting these out lately. Kind of back to not being able to get anything out again though... Oh well. I'll see how it goes in the next chapter. I'll probably just end up working on _A Peculiar Situation_ or the _HWHL_ one-shots. **

**As usual, thank you guys for all of the lovely reviews. You all influence this so much and without you all, I wouldn't be sitting here uploading the 34th chapter.**

* * *

When Bickslow put his babies away, so to speak, she'd honestly been a little disappointed. She'd gotten used to having them around her and even though they'd only been around her because they were trying to make her feel better and keep her company, she'd found herself getting attached to them, almost.

But then Bickslow had explained that a week of using their own power (something that had honestly impressed him) had probably pushed their limits a little too far, and honestly, he didn't feel up to the task of keeping them around on his own magic. So Lucy couldn't really complain about that at all, so she was okay. Mostly.

Bickslow was still a little surprised that they'd stuck by her for an entire week. Sure, he knew exactly why they'd done it, but it still surprised him, just because his babies were, well… for the most part, they weren't usually ones to willingly spend time with people other than himself.

In a way, Bickslow's babies were a lot like him just because souls often took on certain personality traits of their masters. So, the little guys were basically pranksters at heart and more often than not, they were all involved in Bickslow's pranks. They were a little bit stubborn and they also liked caused trouble, but, that was only when they used their own power rather than Bickslow's and honestly, they happened to do that more than they should. But Bickslow never minded.

Now, Bickslow had been collecting those souls for an incredibly long time – some of them he'd had since he was a kid and the last time he'd added to his immortal troupe of dolls was when he was eighteen, so he'd had plenty of time to get close to them and them in turn, close to him.

But that was the thing. His babies only ever got close to him. Anyone else and they just didn't care, and they'd never had to. Lucy though… it was quite clear to Bickslow that the babies actually liked Lucy, and that surprised him because in the months that they'd been together, there had only been a handful of times where they'd interacted with each other.

"So, I was reading during the week…" Lucy mumbled, her head propped up on her hand as she sat curled up on the chair. "Souls and spirits are pretty similar."

A wide grin spread on Bickslow's face. "I know." And he really did know. He knew exactly what it was that made them so and he also knew that those similarities also extended to the mages themselves.

Now, Bickslow had always had a fascination with Celestial Spirit mages just because of those similarities. It was part of the reason he'd been so surprised to find out Lucy was one when they'd first met, considering she was the first the guild had had in a long time. Sure, they had an actual spirit, but not a Celestial Spirit mage.

Bickslow had known about souls and spirits being similar since he was a kid. He knew that each saw their respective mages as masters (for the most part), and he knew that each drew their power from their masters, and, when they had deep enough bonds, they were able to use their own magic.

And that's really what it was all about – bonds. Hell, it was the bonds that made himself and Lucy actually quite similar. Well, in a way. Of all the things that were different about them, Bickslow thought it was nice that their magic was one of the only things that was alike.

He'd done enough research into Celestial Spirit magic to know that not only do the mages get their strength and power from their spirits themselves, but the spirits from their masters. So, really, they strengthen each other. It was the same for Seith magic, but instead of spirits, it was the souls. Bickslow's babies made him stronger and he made them stronger in turn.

Or, in other words, it was the bonds they shared between their souls and spirits that made them stronger. That's what made them similar.

But of course, he'd never actually told Lucy just how much he knew about her magic, just because it had never really come up.

Until then.

"Of course you do." Lucy said with a slight laugh. Because really, it made sense for Bickslow to know about it. After all, he'd been a Seith mage his entire life so he'd have to know practically everything there was to know about it; _she_ was the one who was only just learning about it.

Although, she did have to admit that she was a little surprised Bickslow had never brought it up, considering he'd obviously known about it the entire time. _Huh… interesting…_

Bickslow chuckled slightly, pushing himself up onto his elbows and wincing slightly before the pain faded from moving again. "Yeah, sorry," He muttered, "So, you know the whole bonds thing, right?" When she nodded slowly, an eyebrow raised slightly, he continued, "You know the similarities kind of extend to us, right? I mean like, you and your spirits kind of feed off each other, so your magic increases because of them and theirs because of you. It's basically how the babies work." He said, the corners of his mouth twitching in amusement as he watched Lucy's face.

It honestly took her a few seconds to wrap her head around it before she realised that he was right. That was exactly how her magic worked and hell, it was exactly how his worked. So it wasn't really just the souls and spirits themselves that were similar, it was their magic in general.

It was all about the bonds, and honestly, it was a little ironic that it was the bonds they'd be, well… bonding over.

"Wait… you know about my magic?" She asked, an eyebrow raised. In the months they'd been dating, she'd never seen him even taken an interest in her magic, not like she had with his.

He shrugged as best he could from his position with a smirk, "Always had a fascination with it, to be honest. I know more than you think."

"And you never told me?"

"Did I need to?"

"Well, no… but…" She mumbled. _Damn it, he got me there._ "Would've been nice to know, you know?"

"Sorry," Bickslow said, sliding back down the bed when he glanced towards the clock on the wall. "Kinda surprised you've never noticed the books in my apartment." He'd seen her go through almost every single book he owned, and that included the ones he had on her magic. Sure, there were only two or three of them, but he'd still expected her to ask why he had them in the first place, just because there were only a few different magic type books he owned.

She furrowed her brow when she tried to recall the books. She couldn't remember ever seeing them and considering she'd alphabetised his entire book collection, she was really confused. She should have noticed something like that, damn it!

"Anyway, you should go and get some sleep. I'm pretty sure you've yawned about twenty times in the last half an hour alone." Bickslow said with a light chuckle.

"But I'm not even tired!" She complained. _Shit, have I really been yawning?_

"Well, I am, despite apparently sleeping for a week, so please, go home. I'll be here in the morning, I promise." He said with a smirk, only to get an eye roll in response.

So begrudgingly, she got up from the chair slowly. "If I leave and you die, I'm going to find a way to bring you back from the grave just to kill you myself for dying."

"As long as it's to you and not Laxus or Erza, I'm totally fine with that," He said, chuckling when she leant down over him to kiss him for just a moment. "Love you, Lucy. Go home. Sleep."

"Love you too, Bicks," She said with a small smile, straightening up and heading towards the door in the far end of the room before turning to look over her shoulder, "Remember; no dying."

"I'll try not to."

* * *

Bickslow had heard from his babies that she'd cleaned his apartment when she couldn't sleep, and he didn't really care. But when he walked in a few days later, he really didn't expect it to the be _that_ clean. Hell, there wasn't a surface in his house that wasn't sparkling.

"Yeah, sorry…" Lucy mumbled as she followed him in, "I couldn't sleep at my house and then I just couldn't sleep here either and I needed something to occupy my thoughts…"

"It's fine. Besides, it's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about anyway," He said, wincing slightly when he fell down to the lounge. Over the last few days, he'd improved considerably since actually waking up, but it still hurt when he did things like that, as he had now learned. "I mean, you stay here a lot and you're always using Virgo for your clothes and stuff, so I was thinking… maybe you could like, leave some things here…? I mean, if you'd like, that is."

Lucy's face basically lit up as she smiled, moving from where she sat to straddle his legs, her hands on his shoulders. "You mean like a drawer?" She asked, an eyebrow slightly quirked.

"Well, two actually."

" _Two_ drawers? You're giving me _two_ drawers? Gosh, I feel so special! You must really love me if you're giving me _two_ drawers." She gushed, failing dismally at holding in the laughter that soon followed.

And Bickslow couldn't help but laugh with (and a little _at_ ) her. He'd never been able to stop himself from doing that. Her laugh was one of Bickslow's favourite sounds in the entire world.

He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her down against him. The pressure on his abdomen was fine and pain was actually bearable by that point, for the most part. "I _really_ love you," Bickslow said with a small smirk before she leant down, her hands lacing around the back of his neck and tangling themselves up in his hair, "And I would totally give you more drawers if I didn't have so much crap." He whispered, lips brushing against hers.

"I think two is just enough."

* * *

His fingers traced gently over the red scar that ran down his side and curved across his stomach slightly, almost running parallel with where the muscles tapered off towards his hips. He hadn't realised the sheet of metal had been curved until he'd seen the mark, but then again, it wasn't like he'd been paying too much attention to it.

After all, he should have died that day, but for whatever reason, he didn't. Bickslow knew he was a lucky guy; an extremely lucky guy, and for many reasons.

It had been three weeks since it had all happened – since Bickslow had felt like his world was crashing down around him, since Lucy and her team had been pulled into a trap, since he'd almost seen her die right in front of him.

Since he'd almost died himself.

Bickslow would never forget the sound of her screams ringing out across the town, and if anything, they served as a reminder that he was going to do whatever it would take to make sure she never had to experience that pain again.

With a sigh, he twisted, his head going over his shoulder to look at the scar on his back in the mirror. It ran almost parallel to his spine – an inch or so away and on a little bit of an angle. Any other angle and he really would be dead.

And honestly, if it wasn't for all of the work Wendy and Porlyusica had done, he'd probably still be bandaged up and not just looking at a scar. Sure, it was still healing, but he was actually able to move without gritting his teeth or wincing from the pain. Though, if he did try to sit up suddenly if he'd been lying down, it hurt.

There had been some benefits to getting hurt and kind of being forced to spend half of his time in bed. Well, sort of. One being that Lucy considered his scar to be sexy, and honestly, he wasn't going to argue with that. He didn't have many scars, just because he was usually out of the fray when it came to combat so he rarely actually got hurt. In his own weird way, he liked his new scar, though that had only been after Lucy explained that in a way, it could be as a reminder that it was his idiotic idea (in her words, not his; because honestly, Bickslow thought it was brave rather than idiotic… for the most part) that allowed her to get out alive, so he'd basically saved her. Sort of.

Two being that she was spending more time on top, and really, Bickslow loved that. Most of the time.

With another sigh, Bickslow switched off the light in the bedroom and padded back over to his bed, curling up behind the blonde who was curling up into a ball under the blanket and had decided to stay like that for the remainder of the day.

Or the week. Whatever.

"There's chocolate in the kitchen somewhere." Bickslow mumbled with a small smirk, fluffing up his pillow to make himself comfortable again.

Lucy groaned, trying to curl in on herself even more. "I would go and get it if my body wasn't trying to murder me from the inside."

Sometimes, she just really fucking hated being a girl, and that was one of those times. The worst part was that she'd really rather be in her own bed in her own home, but no, the world hated her and was making it so that it was near impossible for her to leave Bickslow's apartment, let alone his bed.

She loved the guy – a lot – but there were some things she really didn't want to be sharing with him. Well, sort of. Lucy knew that Bickslow knew exactly why she was in a ball of sort of self-hatred (well, it was only really hatred towards a certain part of her anatomy), but it still sucked.

Apparently the world – the oh so terrible world – and her enemy, mother nature, who was otherwise known as Satan, was set on pushing their relationship into the whole 'we're going to make sure that you're aware your girlfriend can turn into a psycho for a few days because you apparently _failed_ to get her knocked up' zone. She'd been able to avoid that for nearly six months.

Although, she did have to admit it wasn't as bad as her entire team knowing absolutely everything there was about her – including when she was going to turn into said psycho. Lucy figured it was really just so Natsu and Gray knew when to avoid her – and Erza.

Bickslow chuckled quietly as he pushed himself up from the bed once again, making his way out to his dark kitchen. If there was one piece of advice that his father had given him while growing up, it was that dark chocolate was the key. It was the answer to everything, and honestly, it would probably put him into her good books.

Hell, even Evergreen had told him that chocolate was a godsend.

Bickslow really did know what Lucy was going through. Sure, he didn't understand it – and he didn't really want to either – but he'd grown up with two older sisters who honestly turned into Satan's spawn every month or so, much like Evergreen, and really, Bickslow was a little glad that they'd stopped their several month long missions and jobs, just because he hated having to put up with the self-proclaimed Fairy Queen, much like Freed and Laxus did.

Lucy on the other hand… well, she was proving to be manageable, but Bickslow still knew he had to watch his words.

And besides, it meant he got to put off actually becoming a father for at least another month. Even though he knew he _eventually_ wanted kids – with Lucy, no less – he didn't really want that any time soon. Not when he was 22, anyway.

That, and there was the entire issue of him still hating kids for the most part. It was honestly weird. What kind of person wants kids but hates them?

He was just a weird person.

"You might be the best boyfriend ever right now." Lucy mumbled when he tossed the bar down just beside her, going back to curl up behind her again, barely wincing.

"Am I not the best boyfriend ever all the time?"

"Well, yeah, but… you know, this is like a new level of being the best, because I'd seriously rather be like, in my own bed. Cursing my body – the usual." She mumbled, blushing slightly when she reached out for the chocolate. She realised that there really no point of even trying to hide it from Bickslow. As much as she wanted to, she couldn't.

Bickslow chuckled slightly as he propped himself up on his elbow. "You're fine here. I'm totally cool with you, you know… being a girl and shit," He mumbled, "Hey, roll onto your back."

"What? Why? Don't make me move, come on," She moaned, breaking off a piece from the bar of chocolate and shoving it in her mouth. "Moving hurts." _Like seriously, if I could stay curled up like this for the rest of the day, I'd be fine._ _Damn, I wish I had a hot water bottle… or Natsu. Damn it, why can't Bickslow be a human furnace?!_

"I promise it will help." He said as the corner of his mouth turned up in a small smirk. When she sighed and rolled onto her back, stretching her legs out begrudgingly, he moved to kneel over her.

"What the hell are you doing?" She asked as an eyebrow shot up, shoving another piece of chocolate in her mouth at the same time.

Gingerly, he lowered his hands – palms flat against her stomach on either side of her belly button. "Truthfully, I have no idea," He said, gently moving his hands in a small circle, "But I've seen Ever do it and it seems to make her stop complaining."

Lucy stared incredulously between his hands that had honestly already begun to work their magic and his face that was staring back at her, an eyebrow slightly raised as he did so; he was watching for her reaction.

With a small shrug, she grabbed one of the pillows on the bed beside her and added to the one already below her head, propping herself up even more. "This is weird." She mumbled, cheeks slightly red. She could already begin to feel the pain and tension begin to fade. Lucy began to wonder why she'd never thought of doing that herself, because seriously, it was absolutely freaking amazing.

"Is it?" Bickslow asked quietly, raising his eyes slightly as he continued to slowly and gently knead small circles. "I don't think it is."

"It's totally weird."

"So… does that mean I should stop? I mean… if it's too weird for you…" He said, lifting his hands as a knowing smirk came across his face.

"Hey! No!" Lucy mumbled around a mouthful of chocolate. "It helps, alright? It's just… weird…"

Bickslow chuckled when his hands went back down, "I told you it would," He said. Then, when he looked up again, he felt his own cheeks heat up slightly, "Is it really that bad?" He muttered.

"Are you really asking me about this…?"

"Well, I mean… I'm not really an idiot, you know. I'm a mature adult. With two sisters; and a mother. I've spent more time around Ever than anyone should; and, an awesome as fuck girlfriend, so I mean… it wouldn't really be the end of the world if you did decide to, I don't know, fill me in… or whatever. I mean, I still don't find it weird but could be helpful so I can help you… when you need it… or whatever…" He mumbled, clearing his throat slightly as he looked back down again. _Mature adult. Pfft._ And besides, why the hell was he so embarrassed all of a sudden? He didn't even understand it at all.

Lucy was aware that her face was around the same colour as Erza's hair, and even though the drapes were drawn, she knew Bickslow could tell just how uncomfortable she felt. But hell, she realised she was too far gone to even care by that point. Besides, she had chocolate and he was giving her what was frankly the best – and also weirdest – massage ever.

"Uh, well… it's not always this bad… most of the time." She whispered, still not really able to believe she was actually talking about cramps with her boyfriend. Some things were just a little weird, but it really could be worse.

"Ever said it felt like she was being stabbed with fifty swords from the inside out."

"Pretty accurate," Lucy said, giggling slightly as she took another piece of chocolate, smirking slightly, "I mean, my uterus is only tearing itself apart because you failed to get me pregnant," She rattled on, her smirk turning into a grin when Bickslow looked up, blanching slightly. "Did I mention the tearing itself apart? What about the fact it's twisting and ripping off layers? Like, my body is literally at war with itself. Just… you know, it's not always _this_ bad. But in a way, this is kind of your fault."

Sure, she might have exaggerated – just a little bit – but it was nice to see the usually oh so confident Seith mage acting a little awkward.

"Uh… that um… sounds pleasant…" Bickslow mumbled, looking back down as he shook his head lightly. In a way, he hadn't been expecting _that_ answer, but it also made so much more sense that Ever would quite literally (well, almost) bite his head off or turn him to stone should he say one wrong word. Everything made sense suddenly. "Wait, what? This is _my_ fault?" He questioned as he quirked an eyebrow. _How the hell is this my fault?_

"Like I said, it's because you failed to get me pregnant."

"Do you _want_ me to?"

"W-well, no…" She spluttered, "But I mean… If I was, I wouldn't be… I'll just stop talking." She muttered, shoving another piece of chocolate in her mouth. _Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._

The minutes that followed were probably the most awkward that the two had ever experienced together. Lucy kept eating the chocolate until there was nothing but an empty wrapper which she tossed to the nightstand, looking everywhere around the room but Bickslow. Bickslow just focused on the task at hand, which was making Lucy feel better. Well, trying to, at least. He could do that.

But when the silence became deafening, he couldn't do it anymore.

He moved swiftly, lying back down on his side next to her, his head propped up in his hand with his elbow on a pillow while his free hand continued with the small circles, moving closer to her hip.

"You know I love you, right?" Bickslow said softly.

"So you keep saying."

"Well, I know it's probably not a conversation that we should be having yet, but since you kind of brought it up…"

Lucy turned her head to look to the nightstand – the one facing away from Bickslow. He didn't need to say the exact words for Lucy to know what Bickslow meant, and even though it had been a nagging thought in the back of her head since she'd pretty much admitted she wanted kids one day, _with_ Bickslow and _to_ Bickslow, there was a part of her that was scared of the conversation.

Lucy could remember Bickslow saying he didn't really like kids, so would that mean he didn't want kids with her one day? Even though they were nowhere near that 'one day,' to Lucy, it was the kind of thing that could make or break a future; _their_ future.

Even though Lucy had been brought up in a world where she was to be wed as soon as possible just to produce an heir, none of it had ever put her off actually having kids of her own. Ever. She was never going to have a child just to produce an heir for the Heartfilia Konzern, whether it existed then or not. She would have a child because she wanted one, and to that day, she still did.

The only difference was that she wanted that to be with Bickslow and not some man her father had chosen for her.

But… if Bickslow didn't want children, then was there any point of even thinking about any of it?

"I, um… I'm sorry… I didn't mean to… I know you don't-" She mumbled, stopping only when Bickslow cut her off.

"I do want to though." He said, his hand stopping as he lifted his gaze to look at her face as she turned back. It could mean a lot of things, really. It could mean he wanted to have the conversation; it could mean he wanted to have kids one day; it could mean both at the same time, and really, that's what he'd meant.

"…Huh?" She whispered. It was all she could say.

He smiled softly, "I remember when you said that you wanted to say that there was two people sitting on my back and not mean it as a joke, and… I want that too. Not any time soon, of course, but… one day."

For whatever reason, she could feel the tears slightly well up in her eyes – something that she was completely putting down to her hormones. "But… I thought you didn't like kids…" She mumbled, staring back as she furrowed her brow. She didn't understand.

"Uh… I don't. Not really, anyway," Bickslow admitted, his smile faltering, "but, you know, _our_ kids would be something else, if it ever got to that point."

"So you actually want kids one day?"

"Yeah. One day," He said with a wide grin, then, he began to worry, "Shit, are you crying?" He asked when she stared up at the ceiling, fanning her face with her hands slightly.

"Y-yeah, I'm not sure why though." Lucy whispered, a breathless laugh escaping. She really had no idea she was crying. She wasn't sad; she was actually happy, but not enough to cry. Bickslow wanted kids – one day. He wanted a family with her – one day. She didn't have to worry about whether he would actually be in her future, because if anything, it meant that he saw her in his, and if they were in each other's, then that's all that mattered.

When Bickslow moved to wrap his arms around her, pulling her against his chest as he rolled onto his back, he couldn't help but smile.

"You still find ways to surprise me, you know?" She mumbled against his chest. She could feel the vibration that ran through him as he chuckled; it was something she'd always loved. "I love you, Bicks." She whispered.

"Love you too, Cosplayer." He murmured as he closed his eyes, the smile never leaving.

One day.

One day he was going to have a family with Lucy. Well, it's what he hoped, really. More than anything, that's what he wanted. It had only taken him nearly dying to realise that that's what he wanted more than anything, but maybe that's what he needed. It didn't matter anyway. It was just about spending the rest of his life with Lucy, and honestly, if that happened, he'd be happy for the rest of his life.

 _One day…_

It just always came back to that dream of 'one day,' and Bickslow was fine with that.

* * *

 **I couldn't help myself with bringing the whole 'one day' thing back.**

 **If there's any errors, I apologise, as usual. It's late when I finish these and get around to proof-reading them so there's always some I miss.**

If you haven't, please go and check out the HWHL one-shots on my page! The world can never have enough BixLu. I will change that... one story at a time.  
Also, CelticHeart13's one-shot: _I FUA - I Fucked Up Anonymous._

 **And as usual, please leave a review if you can, and don't forget to favourite and follow because you're all awesome and I love you. ;)**

 **\- April**


	35. Chapter 35

When Bickslow woke up and rolled over, a small part of him began to worry because he wasn't pulling a certain blonde into his side to nuzzle his face in her hair and try and go back to sleep. No, instead he found nothing. Well, a sheet, but nothing.

Sitting up, he rubbed his eyes before he reached across the bed for the small clock on the nightstand and he found himself pleasantly surprised that it was actually a little past noon and not some ungodly hour in the morning. He knew he shouldn't be worrying, but he'd gotten used to waking up next to Lucy, and it was kind of hard not to get used to it when it was how he woke up most days of the week if they were both in town.

Without fail, she usually woke him up at some stupid hour – whatever time she got up, really – but for whatever reason, she hadn't that day, and Bickslow was a little confused. Sure, he still hated mornings, but she usually only did it to let him know she was going to the guild and that she'd see him when he got there. He never cared that he got woken up because he always fell back asleep.

Sighing, Bickslow crawled back up to where he was supposed to be laying on the bed (seriously, he had no idea how he always managed to end up sleeping diagonally when she wasn't there) and made himself comfortable again, pulling the blanket up over his head and fluffing up his pillows. He was ready to just go back to sleep for another hour or so, before he realised it was Valentine's Day and he probably should have at least thought of something nice to do.

But alas, he hadn't. It had completely slipped his mind, and that was something that really made him a little confused, since if anything, it was probably his favourite day of the year. Between the drunk and depressed women that sat at bars and the pathological need to be a complete womanising ass most of the time, it was like Christmas… in February. He wasn't interested in the whole romantic side of it, no, he just wanted the _fun_ part of it. Bickslow had had his fair share of drunken Valentine's hook ups over the years and there were definitely some he didn't want to remember and had forcibly pushed them to the back of his mind where they were to stay for the rest of his life. Despite that, he still enjoyed his favourite day of the year. Immensely.

But Bickslow wasn't that same womanising ass anymore. He wasn't going to be prowling the bars later that night; he was… well, he didn't know what he was going to be doing because he'd completely forgotten about the expectation to actually do something nice.

It wasn't like Bickslow couldn't do the whole romantic, loving boyfriend thing, because he could; if he tried hard enough and he really wanted to, but for the most part, he was surprisingly bad at doing anything that involved actual textbook romance. He just wasn't that kind of person – flowers, rose petals on the bed, wine, dinner, candles. Nope. He couldn't do it. He could do some of it, like the whole dinner and wine thing, but not the rest of it. Lucy knew that when he did end up planning something – like dinner, as he usually did because honestly, that was the extent of what he could come up with when it came to nice, romantic evenings – he tried really hard to make sure everything was right, but she didn't mind. Lucy knew what kind of person Bickslow was.

But seriously, Valentine's Day was something else entirely. He only had, like… seven or so hours to come up with some elaborate, romantic as hell night for his girlfriend and somehow make it seem like he'd had it all under control and not been freaking out about it. At all.

First things first, he needed to get out of bed, so he did so, barely stumbling when he got his feet tangled up in the sheets as he made his way for the bathroom that was on that side of the room. Bickslow stopped heading straight for the shower when he did a quick glance towards his mirror – making sure his hair wasn't totally a mess, because really, he loved his hair – like he did every time he woke up.

Bickslow stared at the two folded up pieces of paper that were taped to the centre of his mirror, one with 'Read this one first' scrawled on it, and the other with 'Make sure you've read the other one first.' Raising an eyebrow, he pulled the first one down and unfolded it, instantly recognising the handwriting as Lucy's.

 _Morning/afternoon, Bickslow!_

 _I'm sorry for not waking you when I left this morning, but it was still really early and I didn't want to disturb you after you got back so late yesterday from that job._

 _I have everything sorted out for tonight so all you have to do is be ready (in a suit) and at my door by 6:30PM._

 _I know it's a little cheesy, but I couldn't decide on what to get you so I wrote you something instead. With that being said, please don't get me anything either because honestly, you spoil me enough as it is._

 _Happy Valentine's Day, Bicks. I love you more and more every day and you know that._

 _Hope you come by the guild later._

 _Lucy._

Glancing up at the second letter taped to the mirror, he pulled it down and walked back out to his bedroom, his shower long forgotten as he read over the first letter again with a slight smile. If Lucy had already organised everything for the night, then maybe she knew he'd forgotten about it?

 _… Probably not the best thing_ , he thought, but he realised it worked out in his favour. Or so he was hoping.

But still, he was a little disappointed that he wasn't allowed to get her anything, not that he knew what he'd get her.

Placing the first one on the nightstand next to him, he unfolded the second one and began to read the words written in her neat handwriting.

 _Once upon a time in a kingdom not too far away, there lived a girl whose name was Cosplayer. Well, her name wasn't really Cosplayer, but to a certain man, that's what her name was and he'd called her that since the day they first met._

 _Now, these two never really got along, and they never really talked either. He would always find something to tease her about even though he knew that whatever he said was the complete opposite of the truth._

 _But, the girl never really minded the constant teasing; the majority of topics being related to her love life, or lack thereof. She didn't mind any of it because inside, she was laughing at all of it. Even though he was teasing her, he'd always been able to make her laugh._

 _Over time, the girl found herself growing more and more curious about the enigma that was the man with the outrageous blue-and-black hair, but of course, the man himself never noticed any of this, and the girl never minded. She was free to observe; to watch; to learn more about the mysterious man._

 _She simultaneously learned nothing about the man but also learned many things. The man kept many things about his life and personality hidden; only revealing them to those closest to him and even then, the girl felt like there were still many things that only he himself knew, and she wanted to know them. She wanted to know all of his secrets; to unravel the mystery of the blue-and-black haired man._

 _But how was she supposed to do that when the two had nothing in common? If anything, they were almost complete opposites. They'd barely talked, he liked to tease her and she chose to ignore it, mostly. He was loud and she was reserved. He was almost brash, assertive, facetious, and frankly, a little rude. It wasn't that the girl wasn't confident, because she was, but it was a different kind of confidence the man had. She was smart and eloquent, honest and kind._

 _To the girl, it was almost as if even talking to the man would end in disaster. After all, what would there be to talk about if they shared no common ground?_

 _'Ah! There is a common ground!' The girl thought, her crafty and cunning nature emerging. Of all things, her nickname as given by the man would be the one thing that allowed her to strike a conversation with him._

 _On all accounts, the name had been one that infuriated her to no end. Over time, it grew to be less annoying and when she heard it come from that same low voice it had been born from, she could only shake her head. It still amazed her that he'd stuck with it for so long._

 _But also over time, she began to see just how hypocritical it was for him to call her that of all things. The girl was not a cosplayer in any way, shape, or form. If anything, the man was more of a cosplayer than her, between his medieval knight-like visor and headwear, to the skirt-like cloth he'd taken to wearing. What he would be cosplaying was was a complete mystery, but that didn't really matter._

 _As if on cue, the blue-and-black haired man grinned when he saw the girl approach, his tongue lolling from his mouth and showcasing yet another one of his outrageous character traits. "Cosplayer." He said in greeting._

 _"I could say the same to you." The girl replied, a small smirk gracing her lips as she stood before the tall man._

 _"Oh?"_

 _A single nod from the girl. Gathering her courage, she continued, "Calling me Cosplayer is hypocritical, don't you think? After all, you're the one who wears a skirt and the visor and helmet that makes you look like some stupid medieval knight from an old fairy tale."_

 _"Maybe." The man said, shrugging slightly as the grin never left his face and taking but a single step forward._

 _The girl was taken aback for a moment, gaping up at the man before her. She was confused. She hadn't expected the usually oh so difficult man to just… agree with her. No, that wasn't right. She was missing something. She was sure of it._

 _"'Maybe?' " She echoed, barely registering that the man had taken another step, effectively closing the distance and towering over her even more._

 _"Maybe I am being a hypocrite," He admitted, "But you still failed to deny being a cosplayer."_

 _"I… I am not a cosplayer."_

 _"Yes you are."_

 _"I am not; you are." She said firmly._

 _Another shrug from the man. "Maybe. But still, you're a cosplayer, and you will always be the original Cosplayer, making you the Cosplay Queen…"_

 _She could feel her face heat up as his words trailed off._

 _"…And if I'm a cosplayer too, then doesn't that make me the Cosplay King?"_

Bickslow fell back to the bed with a wide grin, holding Lucy's story in his hands above him as he tried to wrap his head around what he'd read. She'd essentially called him a cosplayer, and honestly, he had to agree that she had a point. Although, he didn't know how to feel about being called a 'stupid medieval knight.'

Slowly, he sat back up, chuckling quietly at the ridiculousness of it; the ridiculousness that only Lucy could pull off and somehow make it amazing and a little sweet.

He'd decided that he was going to keep her short story, whether she'd wanted him to or not because honestly, he loved it, and he figured that it probably had something to do with the fact that she'd written it herself. That, and it was about them, so what was there not to love?

Glancing up at the photo frame that hung above his bed, he climbed up onto the mattress and took it down from the wall and placed it down on the bed and worked on unclipping the back piece. It was only something Ever had picked out for him – nothing important or worth keeping.

Carefully, he placed the two sheets of the paper with her story inside the frame side by side, leaving a small gap between the pages and around the edges. The frame was the perfect size, really. Fastening the back piece back on with the clips, he climbed back up and hung it back on the nail above his bed, straightening it up and admiring it.

Out of all of the things in his apartment, it was probably what meant the most to him, whether she had meant it to mean that much or not. And that said a lot, really, considering it was just two sheets of paper.

Stepping down from the bed and making his way to his bathroom again, remembering about his shower and needing to get to the guild, he shook his head lightly. Lucy was probably going to freak out when she noticed it hanging above his bed.

* * *

Lucy smiled when she felt the strong and familiar arms wrap around her waist from behind as she sat at the bar, going over her plans for the night with the demon barmaid and the bookworm.

"'Cosplay King,' huh?" Bickslow murmured, his chin resting on her shoulder.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to say that," She said with a quiet laugh before turning her head just enough to kiss the corner of his mouth, "Happy Valentine's day, baby."

He grinned at her use of the title she'd originally mocked him over every time he'd let it slip, but the more he did so, the more she started saying it. Bickslow enjoyed seeing the barely visible dusting of pink on her cheeks every time she said it. It was good to know that there were still some things she'd get a little embarrassed over, even if it really was just a tiny bit.

"Love you, Cosplayer," He murmured, smirking when the tip of his nose brushed against a spot he knew Lucy found sensitive and she let out a quiet giggle, "So, gonna tell me what your plans are for tonight?" He asked.

"Nope. It's a surprise."

"Sure I don't need to do anything?"

"You need to do absolutely nothing," She said as she turned in his grasp slightly, just enough so she didn't have to turn her head over her shoulder to look at him. "I have everything sorted out so all you have to do is show up to my apartment in a suit later tonight."

Bickslow watched for a few seconds, trying to see if what she was really doing wasn't a test of some sort – to see if she was maybe checking to see what he was able to come up with. But he couldn't see anything. Bickslow knew Lucy had tendencies to be a little cunning and conniving – when she wanted to be – but he didn't think this was one of those moments. She genuinely wanted him to do nothing and let her do all of the planning, and even though he felt guilty for forgetting about it all until he'd woken up, he was glad that she was doing it all, because honestly, she would be able to do a much better job than he could.

Lucy was better when it came to doing the romantic evenings, and Bickslow was better when it came to planning the fun days. It had turned into a somewhat silent agreement that they should just stick to what they were good at.

With a small shrug, Bickslow straightened up. "If you say so…" He mumbled before leaning over Lucy to get the mug Mira placed down on the bar for him. "Well, I'm going to go see what Gajeel is up to or something. I'll talk to you later." And with a quick kiss to her cheek, he turned and headed to where Gajeel was sitting with Laxus (as per usual).

Mira walked back over to where Lucy was sitting, polishing the glass and once Bickslow was on the other side of the guild, she turned to the blonde with a bright smile. "Oh my gosh, this is so exciting!" She beamed, almost jumping with joy.

"I know!" Lucy giggled, swinging around on the stool. "I can't wait to see their faces when they realise what's going on."

"I can't wait to see who's going to flip out first." Levy chimed in from where she sat next to Lucy.

"Probably Laxus," Lucy said before taking a sip from the glass of juice in front of her. "Bicks and Gajeel have already done this, remember?"

The Take Over mage placed the glass down behind her, already working on polishing up the next with a rag by the time she'd turned around again. "He'll be fine. I don't even think he knows what day it is to be honest…" She said, a hint of sadness in her voice, "But it should be okay."

Levy sighed as she closed her book. "It's a shame that we even have to do this though. Why couldn't we just be in love with guys who actually know how to be romantic and aren't total idiots when it comes to doing anything even close to it?"

"Oh, come on, Levy. I'm sure Gajeel isn't that bad," Lucy said as she stifled a giggle. "Bicks is alright when he puts the effort in… for the most part," Then, lifting her gaze she looked to Mira, "But Laxus… yeah, I'm sure Laxus is a bit of a nightmare when it comes to that."

"That he is." Mira said, shaking her head lightly before walking to the other end of the bar with a rag in hand, already busy with wiping it down as she went.

* * *

Bickslow swirled the amber liquid around in the glass as he leant back on the bar with one elbow. He'd been standing there at the bar next to Lucy for the last fifteen minutes, and the fact that she wasn't already making comments about the fact he was already on his third – or was it fourth? – glass of scotch in such a short amount of time was a little worrying. In fact, the blonde had been awfully quiet since they'd arrived at the restaurant and been seated at the bar while they waited for their table to be ready. She'd just sat there on one of the stools, sipping away at the fruity cocktail with a smirk on her face.

"Shouldn't the table be ready by now?" Bickslow asked as he looked around the room – almost every table was occupied by a happy couple or multiple happy couples, each of them enjoying their evenings with their beloveds.

But instead of an actual answer, Lucy just shrugged before taking another sip of her drink, swivelling on the bar stool. She was having a hard time hiding her excitement, especially since she'd made a point of arriving at the restaurant early just to watch Bickslow get agitated. Though he was usually good at hiding it, Lucy could recognise the small tell-tale signs of Bickslow getting nervous and beginning to worry, and like it usually did, it began with him fidgeting slightly; his foot tapping on the ground quietly as he stood with his ankles crossed.

Lucy knew Bickslow hadn't made any plans, and she didn't actually mind. He'd been out on a job for the last few days and it had been the first job he'd been allowed to go out on since getting hurt. Despite claiming he'd been ready for work for the past two weeks, the master and Porlyusica were set on making him wait until he was completely healed. For the most part, Bickslow may have seemed like he'd been completely fine and healed, but he really wasn't. Wendy and Porlyusica could only do so much; the rest was just a matter of waiting for his body to heal his wounds and because of the extent of his injuries, he'd needed those extra two weeks whether he wanted to admit it or not.

Of course, he wasn't going to admit that he really had had a constant dull ache in his side the entire time, and he also wasn't going to admit (to anyone else other than Lucy) that after such a short job, he was completely exhausted, and really, he didn't know why. Sure, he'd basically spent an entire month in bed because he had nothing else to do but it wasn't like it was all that different to what he did when he wasn't out on jobs anyway. The only reason Lucy knew he was so drained was because he'd pretty much fallen asleep as soon as his head hit his pillow merely minutes after walking through his front door with Lucy just behind him, and that had only been the night before.

So really, he hadn't had a chance to make any plans or reservations of the sort, and that worked out in Lucy's favour. She knew her adorable dork of a boyfriend wasn't exactly the greatest or the best when it came to being overly romantic or planning romantic evenings. Sure, when they'd first started dating, he'd made a point of trying to be that kind of guy, but Lucy knew he wasn't. And besides, Lucy didn't need him to be romantic; she needed him to be exactly who he was, because that's who she loved.

Now, Lucy was really excited for their night, and that was just because it involved two of her closest friends and their respective partners – Levy and Gajeel, and Mira and Laxus. They were all in similar situations, relationship wise; Gajeel really did have an inability to be romantic, and honestly, Lucy wondered if the word 'romance' was even part of his vocabulary. Laxus, on the other hand… well, he was Laxus. By that point, a fair share of the guild knew about his surprising relationship with the demon barmaid that had been going on for longer than anyone even expected or thought, and whenever it got brought up, he'd just glare at them to make them want to cower in a corner, or he'd shock them – just a tiny bit and it would always be when Mira had her back turned.

Despite it being Valentine's Day, herself and her two friends really had no desire for the intimate and private evenings with their boyfriends, even though that's probably what they should have wanted. They just didn't; and each of their partners was more than willing to let their girlfriends take the reigns on the night. After all, they were all pretty useless. For the most part.

Because of that, the three women had come up with the brilliant plan of celebrating Valentine's Day as a group; not just a double date, but a triple date. And honestly, all three women were incredibly excited and eager for what their partners' reactions would be.

It was Levy and Gajeel who arrived first – Levy just squealing in delight as she skipped up to the bar to hug the blonde before ordering her own cocktail, and Gajeel just rolling his eyes with a groan before going up to lean on the bar next to Bickslow. The Seith mage and Dragon Slayer had both realised that they should have expected something like that to happen, and besides, as long as their girlfriends didn't put a stop to their alcohol intake for the night, they'd survive. Hopefully.

Not long after that, Mira and Laxus arrived, much to Bickslow and Gajeel's surprise.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me." Laxus muttered as he stopped dead in his tracks in front of the restaurant bar, looking between the giggling women and the frankly bored males. It was obvious to Laxus that his two friends had been roped into what was clearly their girlfriends' plan.

"Sorry, Laxus," Mira laughed, "If you'd known then you wouldn't have agreed to coming along."

"Damn straight."

Bickslow pushed himself up from where he leant against the bar with a wide grin as the waitress came out to lead them to their table – apparently the table had been ready the entire time, they were just waiting for the entire party to arrive – and put his arm over the other man's shoulders as they walked. "Cheer up, Sparky. As long as she lets you drink, you'll get through it," The Seith mage said. Then, turning to the other Dragon Slayer who was walking just beside them and behind the three women, "Right, Gajeel? Alcohol is key."

"Assuming they don't cut us off this time." Gajeel muttered.

"Oh, don't worry; you're all free to drink as much as you want this time," Lucy said as she turned her head over her shoulder, the corner of her mouth lifted up in a mischievous smirk. "As long as you let _us_ drink as much as _we_ want."

All three of the males stopped right before the table, each staring at the giggling women with amazement as they took their seats at their table. If they were all drinking, then it was definitely going to be an interesting night.

And interesting… well, Bickslow could do interesting.

* * *

"And then Stalker 1 and Stalker 2-"

"Their names are Jet and Droy!" Levy shrieked as she giggled, playfully slapping the Dragon Slayer's shoulder before lowering her head again to rest on his chest as they laid on the sofa.

"Yeah, whatever, Shrimp," Gajeel mumbled, "Anyway, so Stalker 1 and Stalker 2 walk in and then Shrimp starts throwing books at them, totally forgetting she's naked and those two idiots just stand there with blood noses, too fucking stunned to move."

As Levy buried her face in his chest in embarrassment, everyone else started laughing. Bickslow was wiping a tear from under his eye as he tipped his head back over the armrest from where he sat sideways on the leather chair, his legs over the other armrest. Laxus only shook his head as Mira burst into a fit of giggles from where she sat on his lap on another lounge.

"Why didn't Gajeel go on a rampage?" Lucy asked, leaning forward from where she was curled up on Bickslow to reach for the wine glass on the coffee table.

"No reason…" Gajeel muttered, making a point turning his head away, no doubt to hide the slight blush on his cheeks.

Levy was able to temporarily get over her embarrassment, no doubt because the small woman had been drinking all night over dinner and hadn't _stopped_ drinking since they'd all made their way over to Laxus' house because they'd all found the night surprisingly fun – even Laxus had.

"He might have been tied up…" The Script mage said with a sly grin, warranting another round of giggles from the girls and cackling from the Seith mage.

When Mira turned in Laxus' lap to give him her own version of a mischievous smirk, his eyes went wide and when the Take Over mage shot up from his lap and headed straight for the stairs, he turned back to the group who were all staring back at him with wide grins. With a slight shrug and shake of his head, he shot up from the chair and picked up his glass of scotch and downed it all in one go and headed for the stairs himself.

"No one is getting fuckin' tied up tonight." He muttered under his breath as he disappeared up the stairs and out of the dim living room, leaving his guests to their own devices and imagination for the night and what he was doing.

"Well," Gajeel mumbled, sitting up from where he lay on the lounge and picking Levy up with him, "No way I'm stickin' around to hear that."

"Agreed," Bickslow sniggered, swinging his legs around to the front of the leather chair when Lucy got to her feet, swaying slightly when he was upright having had a little bit too much to drink over the course of the night. Then, as he walked towards Laxus' front door with his arm around Lucy's waist, he looked down with a wide grin and said, "Come on, Cosplayer; I might let you tie me up."

Of course, when the two finally got back to his apartment as giggling and cackling messes in their alcohol-induced states, Lucy made a point of saying no one was getting tied up and really, Bickslow was glad for that. He'd done some weird things in regards to his sex life, but being tied up was never one of them and he was planning on keeping it that way.

Another quiet laugh escaped when Bickslow pushed her down on the bed, and she tipped her head back into the mattress when he climbed over her after throwing his jacket to some part of the floor beside the bed, his lips brushing over the spot on her neck that always made a slight shiver run down her spine.

But when she noticed the photo frame above the bed was different, her brow furrowed in confusion before she scrambled out from under him to stand on shaky legs by the pillows and headboard as Bickslow flopped down on his stomach, mumbling something into the sheets before propping himself up with his elbow.

"You _framed_ this?" She asked, an eyebrow raised as the corner of her lips lifted up into a small smile.

"'Course I did," He mumbled as he pushed himself onto his knees, "Because it was great and I loved it."

Lucy squealed as his arms wrapped around her hips from behind and he pulled her back down to the bed, quieting her giggles when his lips found hers in a tender kiss, keeping most of his weight off her as her arms laced around his neck.

For them, they didn't really need to do the overly romantic gestures and most surprising to Bickslow, it also wasn't just about sex; it was just about being able to be close to each other. Bickslow knew he didn't want to lose that; he didn't want to lose the quiet nights in or the days where their faces hurt from laughing. He didn't want to lose Lucy. Ever.

He already knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, but he wasn't going to move on that. He would wait, just because he wanted to enjoy what they had then; he wanted to enjoy the quiet nights in and the days where his face hurt from laughing with the love of his life.

"I love you, Bickslow. I really do." Lucy whispered, her lips brushing against his with each word.

A small smile formed as he pulled back just a small amount, looking down at the blonde with nothing but adoration and love – like he always did. "I know you do," He whispered. "And I love you more than I can even put into words."

* * *

 **As usual, any errors will most likely get fixed in the next day or so.**

 **Hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **\- April**


	36. Chapter 36

**A/Ns at the bottom of the chapter this time around.**

* * *

When the 25th came around, Bickslow couldn't help but be excited. The date marked six months of being together (assuming them breaking up for all of five seconds in October and the fight they had over not being able to say how they really felt didn't count, and he really didn't think they did), and he knew it wasn't really something worth celebrating, but he wanted to. To Bickslow, lasting six months in an actual committed relationship was a big thing because he'd never done that before. Even though six months was relatively nothing compared to wanting to spend the rest of his life with her, he still wanted to celebrate it. He wanted to celebrate the fact that the last six months had arguably been the best of his entire life and it was all because of Lucy.

He'd spent way too much time on a train the day before just because he wanted to have everything perfect for _today_. He'd honestly been putting the plan together since Valentine's Day – she'd taken control of that, and sure, he'd forgotten about it, but he was taking control _then_.

Everything was meticulously planned and thought out for their night, and Lucy knew nothing about it and it was exactly what he wanted. He wanted to surprise her, but he wasn't going to do so until the very last second. He wanted their night to be one she remembered, even when he managed to outdo himself and amaze her even more.

So when Bickslow walked into the guild at a little past 11AM, he instantly sought out the blonde and when he saw her sitting with her team, his face split into a wide grin and made his way over to her.

"So did you want to leave today or tomorrow morning?" Erza asked her team as Bickslow slid down onto the bench next to Lucy.

Bickslow frowned. If she was going on a job, then his plan wasn't going to work. No, that just wasn't good enough. He couldn't have that. "Going on a job?" He asked after pressing a kiss to Lucy's cheek, his arm going over her shoulders.

"Yeah, for a couple of days." She said, a hint of sadness in her voice, because if her team decided they wanted to leave that night, then she wouldn't be able to spend it with Bickslow.

She'd at least wanted to get dinner with her boyfriend because to her, six months was a milestone that was worth acknowledging, at the least. Lucy never expected to get to that point – to have been dating Bickslow of all people for half a year, but she had been, and she'd loved every second of it. She wanted to love more seconds of it; she wanted to get to an actual milestone worth actually celebrating; she wanted to get to a point where small milestones like six months, and if they got there, one year, were exactly that – small.

"Can you not go?" He said quietly, feeling the guilt rise inside of him. He had no right to ask her not to go on jobs, just like she had no right to ask him, and up until that point, he'd never even come close to asking her to skip out on a job. It felt worse and it really made him feel selfish, and what was it for? Just because he wanted to take her out on a glorified date.

But hell, he was going to let himself be selfish for once.

"I made plans for tonight. For us." He said.

"Oh?" Lucy said, raising an eyebrow. If the plans that Bickslow made were important enough that they couldn't be cancelled or postponed, then she was really curious as to what they would be, on today of all days, no less. They'd had to reschedule dates before because of jobs and such, but she knew this was different.

"Don't go ruining my romantic evening, now."

"Romantic, huh?"

Bickslow shrugged before turning to her team. "Think you'll survive without her on this one?"

Erza nodded with a small smile on her lips, "We'll be fine."

"But jobs aren't the same without Lucy," Natsu grumbled, his chin resting on his folded arms. When Gray elbowed the Dragon Slayer in the side, he sat up abruptly, "What the fuck was that for, popsicle?!"

"Jesus, let the guy take his girlfriend out," Gray muttered, and then, turning to face Lucy and Bickslow as he shoved a fistful of ice in Natsu's face before he could start screaming, he said, "We'll survive, I swear."

Lucy giggled as she looked up to the grinning Seith mage beside her. "Gray gets it."

"He gets it," He laughed, "Alright, come on, the night starts now." He said, the arm around her waist tightening some as he slid from the bench and pulled her with him, pulling her to her feet as his hand took hers once he was standing himself.

She continued to laugh and let Bickslow guide her out of the guild. "But it's not even noon!"

"Yeah, and?"

"Noon isn't night, Bicks."

"I know that."

"So are you going to explain why our night starts now?" She asked, walking through the guild doors with her arm around his back.

Wrapping his own arm around her waist, he laughed again. "No way. That would ruin the surprise and there's no way I'm letting that happen."

Bickslow had _everything_ on that surprise. There really was no way he could let any details about it slip. Everything had to be perfect, and everything was going to be perfect; that meant going about everything as according to his plan.

She hummed in thought, looking up again, "Good or bad surprise?"

"Good. Definitely good. Well, I'm hoping it's good."

"Are you _sure_ you can't tell me anything about your plans?"

"Very sure," he laughed, "Now… I have to go home and get changed, and you need to get changed and pack some other clothes…"

"Oooh, are we taking a trip?" She asked, barely able to hide her excitement and curiosity in her voice. When he nodded and she noticed the smirk, she continued, "What do I need to pack for this trip then?"

He shrugged. "Just your normal clothes for tomorrow."

 _Normal clothes… interesting_. So with a single nod, she continued with her questions. His answers didn't give her any hints on what he was planning, but they didn't quell her curiosity. "And what kind of clothes do I need to change in to?"

"Something for dinner."

"So like a dress?"

"Up to you," He said with another shrug, "But if you do decide to wear a dress, you know I love that dark blue one."

"Hm, I'll think about it," She mused, the smile never leaving as she looked up when they stopped, ready to part ways and head down separate streets to their own houses. "Are we going to meet somewhere later or…?"

He shook his head, "I'll come over when I'm done and then we'll go when you're ready." He said, and then, leaning down for a quick, chaste kiss before pulling back and taking a few steps back, he continued, "I'll see you soon."

Lucy never lost her smile as she walked home along the canal and she was too lost in her thoughts to pay attention to the warnings from the men in the boat as they passed. She was too busy thinking about what her night want entail, and God, was she excited.

Because whenever Bickslow actually took the time and effort to make plans for them, they really were amazing. Lucy could tell that just by keeping it all a secret, he'd gone above and beyond, and whatever it was he'd planned, it was supposed to be special.

She just had to wait and see what it was.

* * *

Bickslow had been trying so hard to keep his excitement in check during the entire train ride. He'd had a grin on his face the entire time, and hell, it was starting to hurt his face but he didn't care. He just couldn't stop smiling.

When he heard the conductor announce they'd be arriving at the station in fifteen minutes, Lucy stirred, lifting her head from where she'd had it leaning on Bickslow's chest having fallen asleep. Though this time, she wasn't embarrassed about falling asleep on him.

Stretching her arms above her head when Bickslow removed his arm from where he'd had it around her shoulders, she stood up to smooth out the wrinkled fabric of the navy blue dress that she couldn't help but wear, just because she knew how much Bickslow loved it, and besides, he'd subtly requested it, and she couldn't deny him that.

"Are we almost there?" She asked, looking out the window of their compartment at the forests that seemed to never end; the pink and orange sky peeking through the trees and above them, bathing the train in an orange glow.

"About fifteen minutes." Bickslow said as she sat back down and he wrapped his arm around her again before he went back to looking out the window.

Everything was so close and he was getting all the more excited.

So just as the train was pulling into the station, he pulled a thin strip of black fabric from one of the pockets of his suit jacket and she raised an eyebrow at him. "What is that?" She asked sceptically, her eyes following it as he unfolded the fabric.

"A blindfold."

" _What?!_ "

"I told you, it's a surprise," Bickslow chuckled as he lifted it over her head, "Now please, just go with it, okay? I promise nothing will happen."

With a sigh, she turned on the bench seat slightly and leant back, allowing Bickslow to finally let the black cloth fall over her eyes and tie it securely at the back of her head, making sure not to mess up her hair.

It was a weird sensation, losing her sight. She felt exposed; vulnerable, even. If it wasn't for the fact Bickslow was right there beside her, then she'd be beginning to panic, begging to have it taken off.

It was because she trusted Bickslow with her life that she okay and she knew that nothing was going to happen. She was safe with him.

When the train finally came to a halt, Bickslow stood slowly as he grabbed their bags from the overhead compartment and let them balance on the babies as he laced his arm through hers, guiding her out of the train and onto the platform with the rest of the people.

"This is weird…" Lucy mumbled, trying to keep as close as possible to Bickslow as they slowly walked through… well, she didn't know what they were walking through. Lucy could hear the people around her, the footsteps on what sounded like a cobbled path, and the voices of them all, none of their conversations giving her a hint to where they were.

She didn't even know what town they were in, but she knew that it had been a long train ride, especially since they'd left around noon and it was now sunset.

"I know, just bear with it." Bickslow said quietly, carefully pulling her everything which way so she wouldn't trip on slightly raised stones here and there.

The first stop was the hotel, and thankfully, it was only a short walk from the station. Of course, when he walked in, guiding his blindfolded girlfriend, he received an odd look from the receptionist – as usual – but he just ignored it, instead turning to lead Lucy down the seemingly never-ending hallway.

But of course, the hallway did have an end and he knew that because he'd walked down the same hallway before, so when they reached the end, Bickslow pulled the key from another pocket and inserted it into the lock and guided Lucy into the room.

As Bickslow grabbed their bags and put them on the dresser that sat on side of the room, Lucy stood awkwardly in the centre of the room. She could hear shuffling from what she assumed to be Bickslow, but that was it.

"Can I look yet?" She asked.

"Nope." Bickslow said, crossing the room to stand before her before leaning down slightly to press his lips to hers briefly. He chuckled when she jumped, startled by it. "Sorry." He laughed.

"That wasn't very nice." Lucy said, prodding him in the chest (maybe?) with her finger.

"I know," Bickslow said, never quite losing the grin still as he laced his arm through hers again and led them out of the room once again, locking the door behind him. "Almost there though. This was just a pit stop."

"You're making me nervous."

"Good."

So out they went, down the never-ending hallway, past the receptionist that gave them dirty looks – as usual – and back out onto the busy streets where he stopped them, yet again.

"Are we there yet?" She asked, a hopeful smile on her face as she looked up to Bickslow. Well, she thought she was.

He chuckled again, letting his babies line up just in front of him and just above the ground, "I said almost. I'm gonna pick you up now, okay?" He said, so when she nodded, he leant down and picked her up with one arm around her back and the other behind her knees.

"Babies?" She asked, feeling him step up as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Yep." He said, looking down at the ground that was getting further and further away.

And so off they went, flying over the tops of the buildings and towards the edge of the town. Bickslow knew it wasn't fair to make her walk blindfolded across the entire town, and besides, using the babies made it all the more fun because she really had no idea where they were going, what direction they were heading, or how fast they were going.

It was getting to the point where Bickslow was considering just ruining the surprise in general just because he was so excited.

So when they reached the edge of the town, the familiar ranger's cabin in sight, he gently stepped off from his perch on the babies before they went back to hovering just behind him. He didn't let Lucy get back on her feet though. No, he continued carrying her, only shifting his grip on her slightly to make it more comfortable for himself.

She could hear the sound of stones and twigs crunching and snapping as he walked and her brow furrowed in confusion. Why the hell had he made her wear a dress if he was taking her to a forest? Well, that's just what it seemed like. There was a familiar smell in the air and it reminded her of a forest, so that's just what she was going with.

So with a smile, she shifted to rest the side of her head against his shoulder. "If you were anyone else, I'd think you were taking me out to the middle of a forest to murder me so they don't find my body or something."

Lucy felt his laugh vibrate through his chest and she unconsciously tried to make herself closer. "Maybe that's exactly what I'm doing."

"So much for a surprise."

"Oops…"

Eventually, Bickslow reached his destination and although his arms were getting a little sore from carrying the blonde for so long, he wasn't going to complain. He didn't want her to trip on the trail because of her heels, so he'd get over the sore muscles.

So after carefully making his way down the slope that had once caused them to both go tumbling and get covered in mud and end up in a heap at the bottom of it, he stood right in the centre of the small area and finally lowered Lucy to the ground and turned her to face him.

He could feel his heart racing in his chest as he reached for the back of the blindfold, and slowly, he untied it and let it fall away, balling it up and shoving it in a pocket as he looked down at Lucy with his great big grin.

Lucy looked around in confusion, blinking a few times when she got used to having her eyes open again. The trees, the ground, the area… it just all seemed so familiar. She looked up, the sky above a mix of deep blue and orange with the late sunset, though it was still light enough to see.

"This is… familiar." She mused, looking back to Bickslow in hopes he'd explain it all.

"That's because it is," Bickslow said as he wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her against him. "Because nearly seven months ago, we came here on that job and we ended up in this very spot, getting completely drenched and covered in mud."

Her face lit up in realisation as she looked around again, "Cartervale?!" She said, and he nodded. When she looked back up, she smiled back at him because his grin was making her heart melt. It always did – it was always so big and full of happiness, and the grin he had then was nothing different. "Why are we here though?"

"Because I wanted to come back to the place where everything started for me. When we were standing here, standing in the downpour, my heart was racing. Kinda like it is now," He chuckled, Lucy couldn't help but giggle along with him as she felt the distinct heat creep up on her cheeks when he lifted a hand to tuck a strand of golden hair behind her ear, just like he'd done nearly seven months prior. "I did that last time, too, and when I was standing here last time, I really wanted to kiss you."

Her breath caught as she continued to stare up. His grin had softened some, instead just a smile but it was so full of love – for her, and Lucy could see it. He was smiling _because_ of her; he was smiling _at_ her.

"Right here, in this very spot, was where everything started for me. Even though it took a bit to admit it, this is where I realised that there was something more to you and I actually had feelings for you. This is where it all began for me."

Lucy could feel the tears well up in her eyes, just from the sheer happiness from hearing his words. Her own heart was racing as he stared back down at her with nothing but love, and she had to hold back her tears. In those nearly seven months – the six they'd been together – they'd grown so much together. They'd gone from not being able to admit their feelings for each other to themselves, let alone each other. They'd been through pain and emotional turmoil more than once and they'd still managed to come out of it in love with each other.

They'd still managed to make it through it all, and if none of that pain and heartbreak had occurred, then maybe they wouldn't be where they were in that moment. Maybe all of that pain had allowed them to become a pair as strong as they are, where they felt like they could get through anything just because they had each other.

And that's really all that matters, wasn't it? It was that they had each other. They were each the centre of the other's world, and that's all that mattered.

Reaching up to wrap her arms around his neck, Lucy pulled Bickslow down, and when his lips touched hers in a kiss so full of passion and love, she choked on a sob, only to have it drowned out by his lips against hers. She desperately tried to bring herself closer to Bickslow, and he got the message, somehow.

When he reached down to lift her up, keeping his arms wrapped around her waist and pinning against him, he smiled against her mouth.

But as much as he wanted to stay there pressed against his girlfriend, their lips moving together with their tongues almost intertwined, he really had more to say.

More important things to say, and really, they were the entire reason for it to be a surprise.

So pulling away and gently lowering her back to the ground, though not letting go of her, he looked down with another smile as she wiped under her eyes.

"Lucy, you know I love you more than anything." He whispered.

"I know you do, and I love you too, Bicks." She said as her hands moved to rest against his sides, between his shirt and his jacket.

"No, really. I don't think you know just how much I do, because it's more than I ever thought possible. I didn't think I'd ever love someone as much as I love you, but I do, and it's _you_ of all people and god, every time I see you I just feel like my heart is going to explode just because of how much I love you," He said as he chuckled slightly. _Damn it, don't ramble,_ he reminded himself. "There's still times where I wake up next to you and question just how I managed to get you to fall in love with me, even after everything I've done to you…

"But you helped me get through it all; you helped me see the good in everything, and that good _is_ you, Lucy. You helped me get to a point where I was able to move on from the past, and even though I'm never going to truly forgive myself for any of it, I'm okay with it all, because you helped me tell me what was important and what wasn't.

"But every time I wake up next to you, I get reminded of just how lucky I am. I feel like the luckiest man alive, just because I have you in my life and I get to love you, because you're the most amazing woman in the entire world. You really _are_ my entire world, Cosplayer."

"Jesus, Bicks…" Lucy laughed quietly, wiping her cheek with her hands again. She hadn't been able to stop herself from crying from his words, she really hadn't. "I hope you didn't have any plans where it involves me going in public."

He chuckled as his hand went up, cupping the side of her face as his thumb brushed the tears from under her eye. "You're still beautiful either way," He murmured. Then, gathering the courage, he continued with his grand speech of how much he loved the woman before him. "In these six months, I have totally, completely, madly, hopelessly, and irrevocably fallen in love with you. I just really fucking love you, okay?" He laughed and when she started to laugh with him, his grin got wider. "But each moment I spend with you, I still feel like I'm falling in love with you just a little bit more, even though I'm not even sure how that's possible at this point, but whatever, it is. I'm not complaining.

"Lucy, you know I want to have kids with you one day; hell, I'll give you as many as you want when we get there, just as long as you're happy. I want to have an actual family with you; our _own_ family. I want to have a life with you because I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

And even though they're basically the words any girl wants to hear when they're madly in love with someone, like she was with Bickslow, she was beginning to realise it was sounding a lot like a proposal and she was beginning to panic. Even though she knew she too wanted to spend the rest of her life with Bickslow, if he was actually going to propose, right then and right there, she didn't know if she'd be able to say yes straight away.

It really wasn't that she didn't want to marry him, because she did, but one day. She'd grown up in a world where you only got married to produce an heir for the company, so marriages were often arranged and were rushed in to.

She didn't want that with Bickslow. She didn't want to rush into something like that; she wanted to enjoy what they had _then_ , and she didn't want it to be ruined by something so huge.

She really just felt like six months was too soon for something like that.

"I'm going to ask you to marry me," He said, and when he saw the flicker in her eyes as she began to panic, he paused, just long enough to lean down and press a soft kiss to her forehead before resting his own forehead against hers, "But not today." He whispered.

Bickslow saw when she visibly and instantly relaxed, and he smiled softly. He'd had no intentions of actually proposing, not that night, anyway.

But one day, he was going to. He was going to find the perfect ring and the perfect moment and everything was going to be, well… perfect.

"I want to enjoy what we have, just the way it is, just because I really hope that I actually get to spend the rest of my life with you, so I don't see the need to rush into an official lifelong commitment. Hell, as long as you're by my side, I honestly don't care if we ever get married or not; I just want to spend my life with you, regardless.

"But… one day, I'll actually propose, unless you really don't want me to, in which case this is going to be really awk—"

"I want you to propose," Lucy cut in suddenly, her blush back in full force as she stared up at the love of her life who for the first time that day was staring back at her with confusion, "One day, I mean." She added, because really, that was the important part. "If you'd asked me to marry you right now, I'd have said no just because I want to enjoy what we have right now and I don't want to rush into anything… but one day, if you actually ask me to marry you, I'll say yes. You know, as long as it's not like next week or anything."

And suddenly, he had leant down and crashed his lips to hers, his tongue slipping past when the kiss drowned out her squeal of surprise. Bickslow was pretty sure his heart should have had exploded by that point, because all he felt coursing throughout him in that moment was joy and immense love for the woman right before him. From just a few sentences, he felt like he loved her so much more.

Lucy had more or less agreed to spending the rest of her life with him; she'd agreed to making an actual, official lifelong commitment _to him_. One day. Even though something about it all felt incredibly familiar, he didn't care. The only thing he cared about was the fact that one day, he was going to propose and she was going to say yes.

He would get to the spend the rest of his life with Lucy, and in that moment, he was positive it was the happiest he's ever been in his entire life.

"I love you so much." He murmured against her lips, his thumb idly brushing her cheek.

"I love you too, Bicks." She whispered, pulling him back down.

And just like Bickslow, Lucy didn't think she'd ever been happier. All that mattered was Bickslow and spending the rest of her life with him, and even though she'd been panicking about what she'd do if he'd actually proposed at that very moment and making that commitment, she hadn't been scared when saying she'd say yes when he proposed… one day.

They both knew that they wanted to wait for something so huge and they each wanted to just enjoy what they had going for them, even without ever bringing it up in a conversation.

And sure, it was a little worrying that she wasn't ready to actually take that step and completely make that commitment, but she was basically able to promise she'd spend the rest of her life with him, but she could forget about that. Lucy didn't need to worry about that because they each felt the same way about it and they each knew how they felt about each other, and that's really all that mattered.

Because one day, they were going to actually take that step; that _final_ step, and it was going to be when they were both completely ready for it.

* * *

The world crumbled around them, leaving nothing but each other and the bed below them; the same bed that months earlier they'd been so adamant about making sure they each kept to their sides, but of course, come morning, that had completely failed. It was the same bed they'd woken up in, curled up and cuddled up against one another by accident. The same room in the same hotel with the same rude receptionist in the same town where everything really had begun, especially for Lucy.

And now, they were connected in the most intimate way possible, in that same bed.

But really, it wasn't that the bed was important, because it wasn't. The bed was irrelevant to them.

Nothing else mattered or existed outside of each other, like it always did.

The blue dress that both Bickslow and Lucy loved dearly was long forgotten, thrown to some corner of the room or draped over a chair or something – neither really knew. Their moans sounded out across the otherwise quiet room; moans of pleasure for each other as their naked chests slid across one another, practically clinging to each other like their lives depended on it.

Each whimper, mewl, moan, gasp, scream; each and every sound Lucy made had Bickslow responding with own sound of pleasure, for her, because of her. He loved the sounds the blonde below him made, and he always had. He loved that he was – and hopefully, would always be – the only person to ever be able to make her make such sounds. Each whimper, mewl, moan, gasp and scream – they they were all for him and because of him.

Bickslow knew exactly how to elicit those sounds; he knew Lucy's body like the back of his hand. Every spot that could have her whimpering and writhing from his touch alone – he knew where they were.

Bickslow knew exactly how to bring her right up to the edge, right to the brink of climax, only to stop to bring her back down slowly, just to tease her. And she hated that; Lucy hated that he would tease her, bring her right up to the edge and have her writhing from pleasure in his arms, only to have her release denied. _Over and over again._

But eventually, that sinfully wicked tongue of his would push her over the edge and have her screaming his name to the heavens, over and over, just from the pure feeling of ecstasy that only he could give her.

But when he'd finally driven home into her after barely giving her time to come down from the orgasm that still had her reeling and shivering with each brief touch, she tipped her head back, his lips already tracing over her jaw and down her neck. "Oh god… Bi…cks…." She whimpered, already feeling that heat amass low in her belly all over again.

The friction, the heat, the contact – it was almost too much, but it was never enough to stop. It was never enough to stop them from being together and connected in the most intimate way possible.

He was slurring her name like a mantra, over and over again as she dug her heels into his back – silently begging for more. Bickslow would never deny her that; he could never deny her anything for long, even her release. There was only so much he could tease her before he gave in, just from wanting to hear her scream his name like she always did.

"Oh, right… there…" She gasped when Bickslow angled his hips just at the right angle to brush against that spot inside of her that had her writhing beneath his body, his chest pressed against hers.

Every time, he'd have her gasping for more; he'd have her wrap her arms around his shoulders just to pull him down onto her more, to be as close as physically and humanly possible. "Fuck, Lucy…" He hissed, smothering his moan as he lifted his head just enough to crash his lips down to hers, their tongues instantly battling for dominance before she ripped away just to moan again.

It was never just sex to each other – it was making love and it had always been making love; not sex. To Bickslow, Lucy was and always would be the only woman where it was anything other than sex. To Bickslow, sex had always been meaningless, one-night stands. Love wasn't even something that existed, let alone something he was capable of doing, but with Lucy, it was, and really, that's _all_ there was.

His heart swelled with love and joy for the woman below him. He felt like his soul was always trying to reach out to hers, to connect on another level, just because she was the love of his love and he needed to be connected with her in every single way.

He needed to be as close as he possibly could do her; he needed to feel her wrapped around him as he buried himself in her core, over and over again. He needed to feel her arms wrapped around his shoulders as her nails dug into his back and her legs around his hips, only pulling him in deeper with each thrust.

It was the friction, the heat, and the contact. That's what they _both_ needed, and that's why it had never just been sex. It had never been just sex because they needed to be as close to each other as physically and emotionally possible.

But when it all became too much – the friction, the heat, the contact – she arched her back under him, only to pull her closer against him. The heat and tension in her belly was too much, and as her breathing became more ragged, almost gasping for air between her moans and whimpers, Bickslow kissed over her jaw and up to her ear.

"Scream for me, baby." He murmured in her ear, stifling his own loud moan by pressing his lips to her shoulder as her walls tightened almost painfully around him.

And she screamed like he'd told her to, the cord inside of her snapping as she screamed his name up to the heavens once more, surrounded by profanities and never aware of the time or the fact that there were people she was possibly waking up. The outside world didn't exist, just because when they made love, they were each other's _entire_ worlds, more so than usual.

As Lucy all but shook beneath him, a whimper escaping her throat each time he rolled his hips, rubbing against her over-sensitive bundle of nerves that sent a shiver down her spine.

But when it all became too much for Bickslow – the friction, the heat, the contact, he ducked his head and with a groan against her neck, he found his own release finally; her core clamping down on him as he filled her, shuddering slightly with each flutter of her walls.

Lucy's fingers slowly ran over the scar on his back as their chests rose and fell with each breath, panting desperately as they slowly came down from their high together, enjoying the almost silent room once again.

So when he finally withdrew and rolled onto his side just next to her, he pulled her close to him once again, still needing to feel the warmth from her body against him as she pulled the sheets up.

"I love you so much, Bicks." She whispered breathlessly, resting her head against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I love you too, Luce." He whispered back as his lips curled up into a small smile before he pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head.

So as the two slowly and eventually drifted off to sleep, the sounds of their breathing still the only sounds in the room, they found themselves wishing that they could wake up like that in the morning – curled up and cuddled up against one another like they had several months earlier.

Except this time, it would be entirely intentional.

* * *

 **So... I tried something new, but overall, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter.**

 **Now, I just want to get this out here as a general warning that this fic will in fact be going past the Tartaros arc events, so if you're not up to date with the anime AND manga, I apologise. There will be some spoilers in probably the next 2-3 chapters, but not major ones since I'll be skipping over the actual events and the rest of this fic will happen after that arc (so if you've read the manga, the rest of S &S will be occurring between the Tartaros and Alvarez arcs). I'll explain it more as I go. **

**But as a general warning, I apologise for future spoilers (but I'll also be changing certain things for my own benefit...).**

 **Time for the replies, because honestly, you guys know I love you all.**

 _ **Amamatthews4847 -** I'm so glad that you enjoy it! Don't worry, though; I won't be abandoning this any time soon. This fic is my baby. :P _  
_**Snibs13 -** Hey! Welcome to the party! *waves* _  
_I agree though, they really can be cute, which is why I absolutely adore them. I'm waiting for the day Mashima actually puts in some interaction between everyone's favourite Seith mage and Celestial Spirit mage. I think I'd have a heart attack and melt though._

 _And finally, **Guest** , I don't know who you are, but let me say that I love you too, but... you know, not in the romantic way either. It's impossible to write a romance-centric story based around characters that have next to zero interaction within the series as a whole, but I still try to keep it at least somewhat believable. Just, you know... not outrageous OOCness. _

**But for real, everyone - it means so much that you all take the time to review and read and put up with me.**

 **With that, I look forward to reading your reviews for this chapter (if you leave them)!**

 **\- April**


	37. Chapter 37

**A/Ns at the bottom of the chapter.**

* * *

For once, it was Bickslow who got up first. Although, he did have to admit that he didn't hate mornings as much as he used to, but that was really only because he got to wake up to a certain blonde almost every morning. You know, assuming he wasn't out on a job and neither was Lucy, and with the Grand Magic Games coming up in just a few months, everyone was taking more jobs or going off to train in the hopes they'd improve enough to be selected for one of the two teams that Fairy Tail would be entering.

But today, he didn't care about training, and he never really cared all that much anyway. Bickslow wasn't interesting in being on one of the teams, but unfortunately, he was getting dragged along to every menial job and training session that Freed could come up with, just to support Laxus. Because let's face it, Laxus was going to be on one of the teams again.

Rolling over slightly to face the still sleeping blonde in the dim room, he draped his arm over her stomach and pulled her towards him. "Morning, baby." He murmured, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek and nuzzling his face in the crook of her neck.

A lazy smile floated across her face as her eyes opened slowly, gradually getting pulled from her slumber. "You're up early."

"I know, but I just really wanted my present and I couldn't wait any longer." He said, the corners of his mouth lifting up into a small smile as he shifted, hovering over her as his lips trailed down the side of her neck.

"Bicks…" She said quietly, rolling onto her back as Bickslow moved to kneel over her hips. She frowned as she looked up at him, and she could already feel the guilt begin to bubble up inside of her. "You told me not to get you anything for your birthday…"

Because for the last two weeks, Bickslow had made it quite clear that Lucy wasn't to do anything or get him anything for his birthday. Hell, every day he was making her verbally agree to not planning anything or getting anything. He was having to remind her of it every day, because he knew that his girlfriend really wanted to do something for his birthday. The only problem was that Bickslow just never really celebrated it. Ever.

But now, what was Lucy supposed to think? She felt bad enough that she couldn't do anything and now here he was, saying that he wanted his present. What the hell was Lucy even supposed to do?

Leaning down, Bickslow grinned. His hands trailed down to her hips, toying with the fabric of her singlet and lifting it up slightly to feel the silky flesh beneath the fabric as the tip of his tongue ran up the side of her neck before reaching her ear and pulling her lobe into his mouth, gently nibbling on it as a quiet sigh escaped her lips.

"I know I did," He murmured, only ducking his head to brush his lips down over her neck and to her shoulder. "And you know why I said that?"

"No…"

"Because no matter what you would have gotten me," Bickslow said quietly as he suddenly sat up slightly, his hands cupping her face as he stared down at the brown orbs that had completely captivated him. "It wouldn't compare to you." Then, as his lips curled up into a smile once again, just from the sight of Lucy's frown disappearing slowly, he murmured, "Because you, my darling Cosplayer, are all that I could ever want or need. You're my present for every day of the goddamn year."

Lucy smiled slightly, a quiet laugh escaping her as she wrapped her arms around Bickslow's neck and pulled him down into a slow, deep kiss. She honestly loved the guy, probably way too much, but sometimes Lucy couldn't help but wonder about some of the things he said, especially when they left her feeling like she was going to melt into a puddle of her own feelings, because really, Bickslow seemed to know just what to say or do to have her heart pounding in her chest and her breath catching. Lucy didn't know if he thought about those kind of lines and just waited for the perfect moment to say them, or if he just came up with them on the spot, because seriously, they seemed to just roll off his tongue so effortlessly – and really, that seemed fitting for Bickslow, of all people.

Pulling away as his hands went back to her sides, slowly pushing the thin fabric of her shirt up higher and with a devilish smirk, he said, "So, what were your plans for today?"

"Didn't make any." She said, raising her arms above her head as Bickslow lifted her shirt up and tossed it across the room. She arched her back slightly with a quiet moan as his tongue grazed over a pebbled peak, his fingers gently pinching her other. "Besides, you're the birthday boy," Lucy gasped as he pulled a nipple into his mouth, gently biting down as his tongue flicked over the tip. _Damn it, he's making it hard to focus on anything._ "What did _you_ want to do today?" Though, Lucy was pretty sure she knew how he wanted to _start_ the day.

"Not too sure," he mumbled with his lips against her stomach, slowly inching down with light kisses as his fingers hooked into the waistband of her shorts. Then, raising his eyes to meet hers while letting his tongue glide over the skin just above her waistband, he said, "I'm thinking breakfast in bed might be nice though."

"Well… if you want breakfast… then you should probably stop undressing me." _Oh, too late… there go the rest of my clothes_ , she thought as Bickslow tossed the remainder of her clothing to the other side of the room, leaving her bare beneath him.

Bickslow's hands smoothed down her legs as he settled himself between them, his wide frame pushing them apart as he hooked his arms around them. "That's not what I meant." He mumbled, his mouth flush against the inside of her thigh, slowly – almost painstakingly – inching his way towards the apex.

"O-oh…"

And when he looked up again in time to see the faintest dusting of pink across her cheeks in the dim room, he chuckled quietly. It was nice to know that there were still some things that made her blush, even after nearly seven months of dating; it was nice to know he hadn't _completely_ corrupted her. Because after everything, there was still that small semblance of innocence within her, and even though she was almost as confident as he was when it came to the bedroom, Bickslow still enjoyed that shy blonde, just as much as he enjoyed the near insatiable one, even if it still surprised him that she was such a vixen – an incredibly sexy vixen, at that.

And hell, he loved the fact that she was completely his; he was the only one to see those sides of her and he was damn happy that he was going to be the only one to ever see those sides.

She was completely his and he was completely hers.

* * *

"Come on, do it already." Bickslow complained, his hands going up and gesturing towards himself.

Lucy frowned. "What if I hurt you? I don't want to hurt you. What if I hit your scar? And oh god-"

"Baby, it's been five months," he interjected, lifting up his shirt and pointing to the scar across his side. "It's just a scar. I'm fine, and you're not going to hurt me." Well, she wasn't going to hurt him too much. Hopefully.

"Can't I practice on someone else?" Lucy asked as she wrapped her hands around her elbows and looked around the room; the rest of his team was sitting on a stack of mats not too far away, all with amused expressions as they watched them.

"No, because I'm the only one stupid enough to volunteer."

"See? Even you know it's a stupid idea-"

"Blondie, just fuckin' kick the guy already, before I do." Laxus said, his lids lowered in boredom as he wrapped a towel around the back of his neck. He'd heard stories about Lucy's famous kicks. Hell, Freed had mentioned Bickslow complaining about it for hours after they'd lost to Lucy and Cana on Tenrou, and there was a part of him that wouldn't wish the wrath of the petite Celestial Spirit mage upon anyone (well, she could go all out on Natsu and Bickslow. He didn't care much about those two, most of the time), but he really did have to admit he was excited about seeing Bickslow getting his ass handed to him again.

Bickslow had been helping Lucy with becoming more agile since he wasn't interested in training himself, so with the rest of Lucy's team off doing their own thing as part of their own training for the Grand Magic Games, Lucy joined the Raijinshuu in Hargeon between jobs.

But it had gotten to a point where Lucy really needed to test out her new tricks on someone, and no one was willing to be on the receiving end so who better to test them out on than her loving boyfriend and coach?

With a sigh, Lucy walked over to the spot that had been marked on the mat and looked up to Bickslow, and she wasn't entirely surprised to see that he was grinning with his tongue hanging out. As usual.

"Come on, Cosplayer," Bickslow jeered. "I know you want to kick my ass again."

So with another sigh and a slight scowl on her face, she got into her starting position. _I can do this,_ she told herself _. I've spent weeks practicing this. I can do this… all I have to do is come out of it and kick Bickslow… yeah, I can do that…_

Hell, she loved the guy, but he really did get on her nerves sometimes and she did have to admit it had been somewhat satisfying to kick him square in the chest back on Tenrou.

With a steady breath, she started on her short run-up and propelled herself into a simple cartwheel, her palms spread on the ground just in front of her as she turned in the air. As soon as her feet had touched the thin mat again, her back towards Bickslow, she launched herself backwards and rotated until her hands had touched the ground, and with her legs slightly split in the air, she caught a glimpse of Bickslow from her upside down state. Closing her eyes quickly, she used the momentum she had and pushed off from the ground with her hands and twisted herself in the air so she was facing him once again (or so she hoped), and like she always did when she went for her famous kicks, she had one leg out before her and all she could do was wait until it collided with Bickslow. As soon as she did and she heard a quiet grunt from him before a loud thud, she opened her eyes from where she crouched, a little hesitantly, of course.

When she did that, it felt longer. It felt longer than the incredibly short seconds that it actually took. She felt like time actually slowed down and she was able to think about every move she made; every slight twist in the air and every rotation.

But in reality, it was just a couple of seconds.

Evergreen started cheering as Laxus and Freed clapped while Bickslow chuckled. "Nice job, Blondie." Laxus said, jumping down from the stack of mats and walking back over to his corner of their gym.

"Yeah, well done, Lucy," Evergreen agreed, jumping down with Freed as they headed towards the sparring arena in the middle once again. Turning her head over her shoulder and looking towards Lucy with a smile, she said, "Not many people can send Bicks to the floor like that."

Lucy frowned as she went to kneel beside Bickslow as he slowly sat up, rubbing just below his chest with one hand and leaning back on the other. Sure, it really had been a little satisfying to send him flying backwards (into the crash mats that had been placed behind him for that very reason), but Lucy still didn't like the fact she'd hurt him, even though he'd deny it.

"You were supposed to try and dodge it, Bicks." Lucy said, scowling at Bickslow as she lifted up the side of his shirt just to peek at the scars on his side and his back. God forbid she have kicked him near there. She was still worried that his injuries were a problem just because it was the kind of injury that would take some time to truly heal. Even though it had really been five months, she was still worried.

"No I wasn't." Bickslow chuckled, grinning up at Lucy.

"Yes, you were. Even if I do find a reason to ever do that, no one is going to be stupid enough to just stand there; they'll dodge it, which was what you were _supposed_ to do."

He shook his head as he stood up slowly, taking Lucy's hand when she offered it. "Nope. I did exactly what I was supposed to do, and that was stand there." When she opened her mouth to argue it, he leant down quickly and silenced her with a brief kiss. "Because if and when you do end up using that, then the guy is gonna be too busy trying to look up your skirt to move a muscle."

A light blush spread across her cheeks her mouth curled up into a small smile as she gently pushed back on his chest. "I'm not even wearing a skirt, you perv."

With a wicked grin, he bent down to lift her up, his hands cupping her ass as her legs wrapped around his waist and her arms his neck. "You usually do though," he said, pushing his head forward to kiss her lips briefly again. "Besides, I was too busy trying to look at your ass to even think about moving."

"If you were anyone else, I'd have kicked you across the room by now just for even thinking about looking at my ass." Lucy giggled.

"I know," he chuckled as he lowered her back to the ground and pulled away to go back and stand on his own spot, his arms folded across his chest as Lucy slowly made her way back over to hers. "Now, let's try that again, and keep your eyes open this time."

"You saw that?"

"Yup. If you close them, you're not going to be able to correct your position in the air should someone actually move away or towards you. Remember?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I remember."

"Good. Now, come on, Cosplayer. Give me all you've got." Bickslow said with a wide grin, his tongue lolling out of his mouth once again.

And by the end of the day, Bickslow was all but on the verge of collapsing, much to Laxus and Evergreen's entertainment and Lucy's despair. Plenty of bruises were already appearing, but he never once lost his grin, even when he managed to get hit in the face by Lucy at some point. All day they'd worked on her new tricks, much like they did a lot of the time – when they could, anyway – and honestly, Bickslow was incredibly proud. Considering just a couple of months earlier, Lucy had barely been able to do a handstand, it was incredibly pleasing to watch her slide, roll, and occasionally flip herself into the air like she'd been doing it her entire life. Sure, the chances were that she was never going to get a chance to use any of the fancier ones she'd been working on with Bickslow, but should she ever need to do something like that, she'd know how to.

The best part was that Bickslow had found a way for her to get her spirits involved, whether they just occupied themselves elsewhere in the room so Lucy could get used to the tug on her magic power while physically using her energy, or Lucy used them to further improve her newfound abilities, whether that was by pushing off from them to propel herself into the air or they caught her when coming back down or something else entirely.

Loke, of course, was also enjoying watching Lucy send Bickslow flying into a pile of crash mats time after time. He was probably enjoying it a little bit too much, but hey, there was nothing either could do about. By that point in Bickslow and Lucy's relationship, Loke and Bickslow had come to a sort of truce; Loke understood that Bickslow was going to be in his master's life for the foreseeable future and he knew that the Seith mage was one of the main reasons for her happiness, and Bickslow understood that Loke was always going to be just a little bit wary of him, but it wasn't because Loke didn't trust Bickslow. No, it was just because he wanted to protect his faithful master. Loke would stop trying to get Lucy to marry him and offend Bickslow in the process by trying to convince her to leave him (for the most part), and Bickslow would stop making threats about adding a lion skin rug to his living room and freaking out whenever the annoying spirit showed up in his bedroom in the morning to wake up Lucy… for the most part.

It was because of their mutual desire to protect Lucy and because they loved her that they were able to come to a truce. They were going to be in each other's lives so they pretty much had to at least try and get along. Sort of.

And of course, Lucy had played a part in the terms of their truce – a very big part. If she'd left them on their own, well… she didn't want to think about what would have happened.

Virgo and Taurus though, when they'd been called out to help Lucy with her practice, had been more than happy to just get on with what they'd been summoned for, and that was provide Lucy with assistance rather than laugh at Bickslow.

But by the end of the day, everyone was exhausted from another extensive training session – Laxus and Lucy more than anyone – and when the rest of the Raijinshuu and their fearless leader headed back to Magnolia on the last train out of Hargeon, Lucy sluggishly made her way over to the net below the trapeze that Bickslow was lying in the middle of and had been since everyone started winding down for the day.

Lucy groaned as she pulled herself up to the net. Every muscle in her body was screaming at her to stop moving, but she didn't regret anything she'd done that day, just like she never did every other time she'd ended the day with just wanting to collapse and sleep for the next twelve (or twenty-four) hours. She didn't regret asking Bickslow for help all those weeks earlier and she didn't regret using him as target practice (for the most part).

Bickslow had been more than willing to help her become more agile, to give her options to escape or get a better position should she need to, and Lucy really was glad for it. Most of the things he'd been teaching her, she knew she would probably never get a chance to use, but if she needed to, she'd have them in her toolkit.

Besides, Capricorn was happy with the fact she was getting a lot more exercise done and getting closer to that 'optimal weight,' something which Bickslow argued with considerably because to him, his girlfriend was damn perfect the way she was, and Lucy got to see more of Bickslow when he decided to show off with his own fancy tricks – the same ones that had made Lucy go to Bickslow of all people for help with training, just because he made everything look so graceful and effortless. She wasn't particularly interested in the physical combat-heavy manoeuvres, and if she'd gone with her own team or anyone else, that's what she'd be learning. That just wasn't her style. But herself and Bickslow were actually quite similar in terms of how they fought. They tended to stick to the back lines, just because that's how their magic worked best. Bickslow wasn't combat-strong since he didn't have to be. His babies were what he used for everything, whether he be on the offensive or defensive. He didn't need to be right in the centre of everything, but when he was, he needed a way to get out of it, and that's what Lucy needed. She, too, tended to stick to the back lines when she could, with her spirits doing a fair majority of her damage. But there were always times where she got caught out and she was no match for her opponent, and when none of her spirits or teammates were there to get her out, she needed to find her own way out or at least hold her own, at least until she could escape safely.

That's just what ended up being easiest, and Bickslow was doing his damned best to teach her those. Hell, he was more than happy to only teach her moves that would get her out of harm's way, but Lucy was adamant that she learn some things that could put her on the offensive for once. She needed that, just in case there were times where fighting was the only option.

With a sigh, she rolled down next to Bickslow on the net, the movement making it bounce slightly. "Are you dead?" She asked, curling up next to him with her head on his outstretched arm.

"Not yet." He mumbled, the corner of his lips pulling up into a smirk as his eyes remained close. "Slightly bruised, but not dead."

"I'm sorry, Bicks. I never wanted you to get hurt," When his arm wrapped around her shoulder gently, pulling her in closer, she moved to rest her head near his shoulder as her hand came to rest on his chest gently, feeling it rise and fall with each quiet breath. "But at the same time, I'm not really _that_ sorry, because it's kind of your own fault you're hurt right now." She said with a small smile.

"Don't be sorry at all. After all, I volunteered, remember?" Bickslow said quietly as he turned his head to press a soft kiss to the top of her forehead. "Besides, I'm pretty damn proud of you right now. You must have one hell of a coach to get you to be able to do all of that, considering you could barely even do a handstand not that long ago."

"Mmm, I have an _amazing_ coach. He's handsome, too."

"Should I be worried?" Bickslow asked, closing his eyes once again as a smirk tugged at his lips again.

Lucy giggled, only wincing slightly when her stomach muscles screamed at her again. "Maybe. I mean, he was looking at my ass a lot… did I mention he's really handsome? And I got a peek at this scar he has today and oh _god_ , was that sexy. I don't know, Bicks… I think I might have a thing for my coach."

Bickslow snorted with his own laughter, something that made Lucy laugh just a little bit more in return, ignoring the pain from doing so. "Well, your _coach_ can look at your ass all he wants," He said, turning his head to the side again to look at the grinning face of the blonde beside him. Hell, Bickslow didn't care if anyone looked at Lucy's ass, and he wouldn't blame them if they did (and he knew that there were plenty of people who did a double-take when it came to his lovely girlfriend). As long as they didn't _touch_ her ass, he'd be okay. Looking was fine because when it came down to it, Lucy was _his_ – her ass included. The other perverts of the guild and town would just have to keep their hands to themselves, unlike Bickslow. "So I'm not worried about that, because really, it's hard not to look at your ass."

"You're not supposed to say that, you idiot."

"What can I say? I know my girlfriend is hot as hell." When she playfully slapped his shoulder for apparently not being a very good boyfriend and stopping people from checking her out, he laughed again. "But… I am a little worried about you maybe having a thing for your coach. I mean, surely he's nowhere near as handsome as me… hell, you're even making my sexy scars feel ugly now."

With her own brand of a mischievous smirk, she wrapped a leg around his waist, pulling herself up to straddle his hips slowly (well, as quickly as her aching muscles would allow her to move, anyway) with her hands pressed into the net on either side of him. "Hmm, he's close," she mused, leaning down slightly when his arms wrapped around her waist. "But you're definitely more handsome."

"Damn right I am."

Another giggle before she leant down, pressing her lips to his softly before she pulled back and rolled off to the side again and crawled towards the edge of the net as it swayed and bounced with each movement.

"Aw, aren't you gonna stay? The net makes a good bed, surprisingly." Bickslow whined, rolling onto his stomach. His lips curled up into another grin as he watched the sway of her hips. _Mmm, never gonna get sick of seeing that,_ he thought.

"It's tempting, really," she said, gasping quietly when she jumped down from the net and onto the small stack of mats near the edge of it. "But there's a hot shower upstairs that has my name on it." And really, she needed that hot shower just to relieve the ache in her muscles from another day of extensive training. She'd never understand how her team could train day after day, hours upon hours. Hell, she could barely do it a few times a week without wanting to collapse and die.

As Lucy slowly crossed the gym floor, navigating her way through the obstacle course of bright mats and blocks and scattered gym equipment, Bickslow ducked his head and groaned into the net quietly. If there was a shower with her name on it, then there was one with his name on it, and it would just happen to be the same shower. He just had to find the energy to pull himself off the damn net in the first place and make it across the room and up the stairs to the loft, and then to the bathroom.

But… it would be totally worth it, so with a smirk, he scrambled forward and jumped off from the net and onto the nets, already on his way to catching up to the lovely blonde vixen who was looking over her shoulder with her own smirk.

* * *

The weeks rolled by once again and they were filled with more training and more jobs. By Lucy's birthday, the teams that the guild were entering into the games had been selected, and it was no surprise to anyone that the two teams they were allowed to enter were basically the exact same as they had been the year before – Erza, Natsu, Gray, Lucy, and Wendy on one team, and Laxus, Gajeel, Juvia, Mira, and Cana on the other.

Everyone was getting ready to head off to Crocus at the end of June, their jobs winding down as most chose to stay in the guild just so they could go off to Crocus with everyone else, but for Laxus and the Raijinshuu, that wasn't the case. Much to Bickslow's dismay, they were out on one last job and would be making their way to Crocus on their own and would actually be arriving there a couple of days before the rest of the guild since their job was a lot closer to the city than it was to Magnolia.

But it was Lucy's birthday, and both herself and Bickslow were a little disappointed that they couldn't actually spend it together like they had with Bickslow's. So while Bickslow was busy doing whatever it was that had him out on a job in a first place, Lucy went about her day like she usually did – shaking her head at her team's antics while she sat in the guild, talking to either Levy and Gajeel or Mira and Cana at the bar.

She'd never particularly liked celebrating her birthday (not in an extravagant way, anyway), and that was because growing up, it often went forgotten by the person who meant the most: her father. The only people who came to remember her birthday were the servants and maids and the various people who looked after her, and eventually, that's the kind of birthday she came to love and look forward to. She didn't want the extravagant parties where people were all but forced to smile and pretend they wanted to be there; to wish her well and shower her with gifts and attention.

She never wanted any of that. She didn't want the gifts and the forced attention because she just wanted to be around her friends. And growing up, the servants and maids and various people who looked after her were her friends.

But now, she had the guild and she had Bickslow. They were her friends and her family and she was more than fine to spend the day like she did any other day.

Well, as normal as possible, since after all, once Mira found out it was someone's birthday she always made a point of celebrating it within the guild. But with Lucy, she toned it down, just because she knew Lucy didn't want anything too big or too grand.

So sure, she wouldn't get to spend her birthday with Bickslow, but that was okay, even though it was a little disappointing. She had her guild and her friends by her side all day and she was getting the low-key birthday she wanted.

Well, as low-key as it was going to get for Fairy Tail.

* * *

Bickslow picked up the communications lacrima from where it sat on the small coffee table in their hotel room and placed it on a pillow at the foot of his bed before he laid down on it, his chin resting on his folded arms on the bed. Evergreen was on the bed just next to his, busy giving herself a manicure, and Freed and Laxus were on the opposite side of the room; Laxus with his music blasting through the headphones for everyone else to hear and Freed with his nose in yet another book on runes. He'd been studying for the Level 3 Shorthand Examination for months.

Channelling his magic into the lacrima, he focused on the communications lacrima that was sitting on his dresser back in his apartment. He could have tried the one in Lucy's apartment first, but Bickslow had a feeling she would be in his apartment, rather than hers. Hell, she'd basically moved in by that point, spending almost every night there. But of course, she couldn't actually move in, because her team still had some boundary issues and more than once, Bickslow had woken up to Lucy kicking a certain pink-haired Dragon Slayer out of the bed once Lucy had woken up. Bickslow couldn't even begin to describe how happy and relieved it made him that every time it had happened, they'd actually been wearing clothes, since more often that not, their clothes were on the floor somewhere.

Hell, if waking up with three rather than two people in the bed wasn't bad enough, Bickslow was quite often walking into his apartment and seeing not only Natsu on the lounge, but Gray and Erza too. But Bickslow had more or less given up by that point. He'd stopped questioning her team breaking into his apartment even though it pissed him off.

But hey, he was dating Lucy Heartfilia. That just meant he was also dating her team… sort of. Bickslow knew what he was getting into when it came to dating Lucy (well, he came to realise it later on) and he'd resigned to putting up with her team's quirks and bad habits.

To Bickslow, it was actually quite entertaining in a way because in all the years he'd had his apartment, he'd never once locked his door. That was, until Lucy's team decided to start breaking in at odd times. Hell, he'd even had to get the lock replaced on his door because he'd lost the key he did have, so of course, he got two keys cut that time, with one belonging to Lucy. But… a locked door didn't actually stop them from breaking in as it turned out. Sure, it slowed them down, but they still found a way to get in.

They were like pests; pests that Bickslow had to put up with. Forever.

So that was basically the only reason Lucy hadn't officially moved in with him, because she still needed her apartment just because she was in a team with people who lacked a moral compass and thought it was appropriate to break into people's apartments.

When the picture on the lacrima finally became clear, Bickslow grinned, his tongue lolling from his mouth. "Happy birthday, Cosplayer."

"Thank you, Bickslow." Lucy smiled as she slowly carried the lacrima back over to the bed, setting it on one of the pillows just in front of her as she sat cross-legged, pulling the blanket back up over her legs.

Evergreen and Freed both looked up from what they were doing and Laxus peeked an eye open, staring at the back of the lacrima with slight interest.

"Oh, happy birthday, Lucy!" Evergreen called from her bed.

"Yes, happy birthday, Lucy," Freed added, already looking back down to his book and turning a page slowly. "I trust you've had a good day?" He asked, only briefly glancing up to the lacrima on Bickslow's bed.

"I did, Freed," Lucy's cheeks became dusted with a light pink once she realised that the rest of Bickslow's team was also in the room, just not within sight. "And thanks, guys."

Laxus opened his other eye when he realised that everyone in the room was staring at him expectantly. "What do you want?"

"Are you going to wish Lucy a happy birthday?" Evergreen asked, dropping her nail file into her bag beside her bed again.

"Do I have to?"

"Yes." They all said, drowning out Lucy's protests of saying that Laxus really didn't have to say anything.

But all they were going to get from Laxus was a grunt as he slid down the bed more, turning the volume up on his SoundPod. Shaking their heads, everyone else went back to what they were previously doing.

"I think that's as good as you're going to get." Bickslow chuckled, looking back to the lacrima in front of him and returning his chin to rest on his folded arms.

Lucy giggled, picking up the lacrima and shifting forward so she was lying on her stomach and placed the lacrima against the footboard, steadying it with her hands for just a moment to make sure it wasn't going to roll away. "It's okay. Thanks, Laxus," she said with another quiet giggle. She suspected the blonde man would still be able to hear her, and when Bickslow chuckled, having glanced up in time to see the slightest of smirks from Laxus, Lucy smiled.

"Anyway," Bickslow said, lifting his head from his arms. "Since you're in my apartment, you can go and find your presents."

"I'll have you know that I hadn't actually planned on staying here," she said, her mouth twisted into a slight scowl. "My apartment is getting a slight renovation."

Bickslow raised an eyebrow. "Why do I feel like that has something to do with your team?"

"Because Natsu somehow set fire to my bathroom when he fell asleep in my bath, so by the time I got home, half of my apartment was in flames."

"And you wonder why I lock the door now…" _Not that it helps._

"I know, I know," she sighed. "But I'm working on that. Erza and Gray have calmed down for the most part. It's just Natsu and Happy… but I think they're just always going to be a problem."

Sighing, Bickslow dropped his head again. "I figured," And that he had. He just had to fall in love with the girl with the crazy team. He just had to. "Anyway, presents time."

"Bicks, I told you not to get me anything." Hell, she didn't even need anything, and besides, Bickslow hadn't allowed her to get him anything for his birthday, so how was it fair that he got to get her something?

Ignoring her statement and frown, Bickslow continued, "Okay, so one is in the second drawer of my desk, and the other is on the top shelf of the wardrobe at the back. One is wrapped, so you'll know it when you see it, and the other is in a purple box from memory," Putting a finger to his chin, he tilted his head slightly as his brow furrowed. "Although, I can't remember if there's a ribbon on it or not."

"The top of the wardrobe? Really?" She complained, slowly getting up from the bed and disappearing out of the lacrima range and leaving Bickslow with a view of the messy sheets on his bed.

Lucy came back a few minutes later after rooting around in both his desk and top of the wardrobe for the presents in question. She'd had to get a chair from the dining table just to be able to reach the top of the wardrobe, but she realised that that was the entire point of it being up there – just so she wouldn't be able reach. His desk, though… she wasn't too sure about that one since she would actually sit there occasionally. It wasn't like Lucy made a habit of going through things that she knew had only Bickslow's stuff in, but then again, when it came to his desk, she'd had no reason to look in any of the drawers, so maybe that was why he'd used it as a hiding spot? Hell, she didn't really care as to why to be honest.

At that moment, she was just too curious as to what it was he'd gotten her.

"Okay, so, which one first?" Lucy asked, placing the two gifts down on the bed just in front of the lacrima as she folded her legs under her and leant forward, resting on her knees and her elbows.

"Whatever one you want to open first."

"Alright then." She said, and after looking between the two for a moment, she decided on the wrapped one. It was roughly the size of a thin book, and in her hands, it felt flimsy, but not too flimsy so it felt like jelly in her hands. Carefully, she began to tear off the silver wrapping paper before tossing it to the floor beside the bed and a wide grin spread across her face slowly as she turned the object over in her hands. " _482 Writing Prompts and Character Development Questions,"_ she mumbled, reading the title of the book slowly before she began to flick through the pages. Looking back up to the lacrima to see Bickslow's still grinning face, she said, "I love it."

Bickslow chuckled as he shifted to get to a more comfortable position, letting his chin rest in his palms instead. "Glad you like it. Now open the other one."

Placing the book down just beside her, she reached for the purple box that did in fact have a silver ribbon on it. She undid the ribbon, letting it fall to the bed as she placed the box in the palm of her hand and gently pried the lid from it. "Aw, Bicks," she whispered, choking back a sob of happiness as she reached out to run a finger over the charm bracelet inside the box. "It's beautiful. Thank you."

"Like you." He said, groaning slightly when Evergreen suddenly flung a pillow at his face. "Fuck off, Ever." She made a squeak when Bickslow tossed the pillow back and started laughing raucously when it caused her to lose her balance on the bed and fall backwards to the floor.

"Damn it, Bickslow!" Evergreen shrieked, already pulling herself up and reaching for the pillow.

Giggling quietly from the sudden pillow war that Bickslow and Evergreen had suddenly found themselves in, Lucy lifted the charm bracelet from the box and slowly turned the silver chain around in her hands. There were already three charms on there. One, a golden key with small white gems inlaid on the handle; two, a small heart-shaped charm, simple enough with a diamond encrusted front with a single red gemstone in the centre of it; and three, a simple model of one of Bickslow's babies, the small wings being in white gold and the body in silver. Lucy could feel the tears sting at her eyes as she looked down at the gift. It was such a thoughtful gift. She didn't even want to think about how much Bickslow had spent on it.

It was at times like these when Lucy truly wondered how she deserved to have someone like Bickslow. It was never about him not deserving her, because to Lucy, she didn't know who else could possibly deserve her. Bickslow was the only one who ever could and ever would deserve her – her heart and her love – and she was more than happy and finally ready to spend the rest of her life with the love of her life. But still, she had to wonder how she deserved him, because he was far too kind to her; he spoiled her beyond all belief, he made her laugh when she needed to smile, and he kept her safe and made her feel wanted and needed. Always.

Lucy just truly didn't know how she ended up with someone so perfect. Every habit, every quirk, every annoying little thing he did that drove her up the wall was what made Bickslow perfect in her eyes. He was everything she needed and she loved him more than she could put into words.

"Come on, you're not supposed to cry." Bickslow said as he came back to lie on his bed, his smile faltering as he watched her struggle with the clasp, holding it between her teeth and one hand as she tried to get it on her wrist.

"I-I'm sorry," she said with a watery laugh, looking back up once she'd gotten the damned thing on her wrist and wiped the tears from her cheeks. She really hadn't meant to start crying, but she couldn't help it. "It's t-too beautiful and I-I couldn't h-help but think a-about how amazing y-you are."

"Well that's a first," Evergreen remarked as she came to sit next to Bickslow on the bed, shoving him slightly so she could get comfortable and see the lacrima from the front. "Never known anyone to cry over this moron being too 'amazing.' "

"Ah, but I have made people cry before." He said with another tongue-lolling grin to Evergreen. Then, looking back to down to the communications lacrima when Lucy laughed again quietly, fiddling with the bracelet as she turned it on her wrist, he said gently, "Open the last drawer of the nightstand on my side."

Lucy looked up, a soft smile on her lips even though her eyes were just showing slight annoyance. "Bicks, I swear to god if this is another prank-"

"It's not a prank, I promise."

"So if I open it, nothing is going to jump out at me this time?" She asked sceptically, already crawling over to that side of the bed slowly.

"Nope."

With a sigh, Lucy reached down to the third drawer of the nightstand on Bickslow's side of the bed, and she did so cautiously just in case something really was going to come out suddenly. Hell, last time she'd opened that drawer after he'd asked her to get something from it, she'd just about had a heart attack as a bunch of paper birds came flying out, cheering like only the babies could do. It was on that day Lucy realised she shouldn't trust Bickslow with anything he said on that particular day of the year. After all, it had been April Fools' day, otherwise known as one of his favourite days of the year.

But it wasn't April Fools' day so Lucy really had no reason to be scared of what was in the drawer, but when she opened it and saw just what was sitting at the very top of it, she screamed regardless.

At the sound of her scream, both Freed and Laxus had made their way over to Bickslow's bed, both interested in just what had made the blonde make such a sound. "What the hell did you do?" Laxus mumbled, an eyebrow raised as he looked at the image of the bed on the lacrima, waiting for Lucy to appear again.

Lucy scrambled for the box with the clear plastic lid, lifting it out of the drawer and bringing it up to the bed as she frantically tried to pry the lid off. "A key?!" She shouted, staring down at the silver key that was now in her hands. "You got me a key?! Bickslow!" She shrieked as she felt the tears start rolling down her cheeks again. She was grinning, and crying, so she really didn't know whether she was really goddamn happy, or really annoyed at Bickslow for buying her a goddamn key.

It was probably both, but mostly, she was incredibly overjoyed and excited, and just a little annoyed.

"I thought you might like it." Bickslow chuckled, still staring at the messy sheets.

" _Like_ it? I love it!" She finally came back into the lacrima's vision and kneeled in front of it, her hands wrapped around the silver key. The bow had small wings sprouting from each side of it, and in the middle of it was the inlaid stone with a silhouette of an eagle, then the head was pointed, much like a beak with a single indentation in the middle of it as it tapered off towards the stem with another feathered motif. "Oh my god, Is this Aquila's key? Oh my god," she shrieked again, pulling the key in to her chest to hug it almost as she leant down to bring her face into the vision of the lacrima. "Why are you so goddamn far away right now?" Because if he wasn't so far away, she'd have her arms wrapped around the man and showering him with as many kisses as she could muster.

Bickslow's grin only grew wider as he saw the purely ecstatic expression on her face. He'd had that damn key sitting in that drawer for weeks and he'd wanted to give it to her every day he'd seen her, but he'd decided to wait to give it to her for her birthday, and boy, was it worth waiting just to see her reaction. When Bickslow had seen the key sitting in the glass display cabinet in one of the magic stores he'd visited while out on a job, he really couldn't help but buy it. Lucy had mentioned how keys were rare to come across those days, so when he saw it, he knew he had to get it for her. The price didn't matter one little bit, because he knew that it would make Lucy happy. Lucy's happiness was priceless.

"Yes, it's Aquila's," he said finally, still chuckling slightly from the small shrieks of joy she was still letting off as she looked to the key. He really did love seeing her like that. "Well, that's just what I got told, anyway."

"Bickslow, have I ever told you how much I love you? Because I really fucking love you, because you are seriously like the most perfect boyfriend ever." And she had to stop herself there, just because she was on the verge of asking _him_ to marry _her_ just because she was that happy. Her annoyance had fizzled, leaving just joy and absolutely love for the idiot and amazing person she called her boyfriend. Besides, his team was still sitting around him and she'd seen the look of disgust that crossed Laxus' face when she gushed about just how much she loved him, and Lucy had to admit that it was a little entertaining.

"I believe you have told me, but you know, I'm always up to hearing it again."

Squealing as she hugged the key close to her chest again, she said with a slight blush, "I swear to god, as soon as I see you in Crocus, I'm probably going to try and tackle you to the ground."

"Feel free to," Bickslow chuckled. _Hell, she can do more than tackle me to the ground when she sees me_. "But can you at least wait until you see me to make that contract with Aquila? I want see how you do it."

"Yes, yes, of course!" She beamed. "Gah, I love you so much, Bicks."

"I love you too, baby. Now—" But before Bickslow could finish the sentence, Laxus had picked up the Lacrima and Lucy was looking at the scowling blonde rather than the grinning blue-and-black haired Seith mage. "Laxus, what the fuck are you doing?! Give me that back!"

"Shut up, Bicks," Laxus groaned, one hand pushing Bickslow back when he tried to the reach for the lacrima in his hand. "Now, I have to put up with this 'lovey-dovey' crap from Mira, and there's only so much of it I can put up with from Bickslow."

Lucy giggled, wiping her cheek with her hand. "Sorry, Sparky." She could hear Bickslow cackling just off to the side and it probably had something to do with the less-than-impressed look that crossed Laxus' face.

"You two are fuckin' perfect for each other, I swear," he mumbled, only before he let his magic crackle up around him before sending it towards Bickslow, and at the yelp that came from it, Laxus couldn't help but smirk. "But with that being said, we have a train to catch first thing in the morning so I would suggest you both say your goodbyes and call it a night."

And as Laxus handed the lacrima back to Bickslow, an audible sigh could be heard as he went back to his own bed, much like Evergreen and Freed had done by that point.

"Ah, I've taught you well, Cosplayer." Bickslow said, carrying the lacrima back to the stand on the coffee table and knelt down before it. At the sound of her bubbly laughter again, he grinned with his tongue hanging out. "Anyway, I probably should go before I get shock treatment again."

"I need to head to bed myself anyway." Lucy said with a quiet sigh. As much as she hoped their conversation could have been longer, it was in fact late and they both really did need to be up early the next morning to finish the preparations for their trip to Crocus for the games.

"Well, I'll make this quick. Anyway, Laxus is still staring at me and honestly, it's a little terrifying," he said, glancing up to see the hulking man sending daggers at him from where he sat in his bed, the electricity beginning to crackle around him again. "I love you, and you have to tell me about what else you got from the guild for your birthday when you get to Crocus, alright?"

She nodded, a small smile gracing her lips as she picked up the lacrima from the bed and slowly walked over to the dresser, holding the lacrima out before her. "I will."

"Good," he said, grinning again. "Now, go to bed. I'll see you in a couple of days."

"I love you, Bicks."

"I know you do and I love you too." Then, when he could quite literally feel his hair rising from the static electricity when he glanced back up to Laxus, he sighed quietly before looking back down to the lacrima. "Happy birthday, Lucy. Get some rest."

And as Lucy placed the lacrima back on the stand, the image faded slowly, leaving just the slightly clouded glass it was made of. She turned and picked up her new key once again, instantly bringing it in close to her chest as she climbed up onto the bed, pulling the heavy blankets up over her as she slid down into the warmth with a small smile on her face.

* * *

Both of Fairy Tail's teams ended up getting through the elimination round, and much to everyone else's dismay, they ended up coming in in second and fourth place, which, was a lot better than eighth like Natsu's team had the year before. So once again, Fairy Tail had an advantage.

According to every other guild, anyway.

With the X792 games, there was one important thing that had been added to the arena, and that was a rune barrier that separated the spectators in the stadium seating and the contestants in the actual area. Not only did it stop people from unexpectedly entering the arena, like many had for the impromptu fashion show the year earlier, but it also stopped any outside influences, namely magic, from entering and interfering.

On the second day of the games, Bickslow had been glued to his spot, leaning forward with his arms resting on the thick limestone barricade that made up their guild's viewing box. He'd been stuck like that since that day's one-on-one fight contestants had been announced, and that was because Lucy had been matched up with a girl from Mermaid Heel. Honestly, Bickslow couldn't remember their names, not that he really cared anyway.

With Lucy getting picked again, Bickslow didn't know how to feel. He was worried and excited all at once. Everyone remembered the previous year's battle and everyone knew that foul play had been involved. If it wasn't for Raven Tail's interference, Lucy would have won.

But regardless, it had been a year and everyone was better and they'd improved. They were stronger.

Lucy was stronger.

But Bickslow was still worried. Hell, he'd be worried even if her win was practically guaranteed, but as he watched the fight go on, he really was beginning to see that that outcome was not exactly guaranteed.

It was past the twenty-minute mark and both girls were exhausted – both their magic power and physically. It was a surprisingly fair fight, and almost everyone in the stadium was on the edge of their seats, waiting to see who would be crowned the winner of that fight.

No matter how exhausted they were, neither gave up, and even though Bickslow was worried, he'd never once lost his smile – even when Lucy got hurt from the fight and she cried out in pain slightly because he knew she'd get up. She'd get up, press on, and never stop trying. It was one of the things he loved about her – her determination. Hell, he was almost envious of it.

When she had a blast fired towards her feet to knock her up and have her disorientated and injured, she had to think quick, just so she could avoid getting hurt. So, she did the first thing that came to mind, and that was jump back suddenly, pushing off from the ground that was crumbling below her from the blast and flipped herself in the air until her hands were flat on the ground not too far away and she was able to land in a crouched position as she stopped herself from sliding.

Bickslow was almost ecstatic, finally having a reason to actually move as his arms went up into the air with a wide grin. "Fuck yeah, baby!" He shouted, his tongue lolling from his mouth as he watched her summon Taurus and Scorpio simultaneously as she slid to a halt, the dust kicking up around her feet and hands.

She'd found a reason to use something that he'd taught her and he was over the goddamn moon.

But the fight went on, and the longer it did, the more exhausted they got and both were on the verge of collapsing. But… when everyone was literally biting their nails from their nervousness – even the babies had stopped hovering around Bickslow just to rest on top of the barrier because _they_ were worried, somehow – everyone fell silent.

Not just the guild, but the entire arena.

They'd seen it before – they'd seen it last year, and last year, it hadn't ended very well. Everyone stood in complete silence and watched as Lucy clasped hands with Gemini-Lucy, pressing their bodies together as their eyes closed and they began to recite the incantation for the same spell that had made everyone sit back in shock a year earlier.

The arena was filled with the constellations in their spherical forms, and everyone could feel the raw energy from every single one of them – the energy from Lucy.

As Bickslow watched Lucy pull all of them towards herself and Gemini, a slow smile spread across his lips. He hadn't seen her use it before (not completely, anyway), but he knew about it and of it, and he knew she was going to pull it off. She was exhausted but she'd be able to do it.

Bickslow knew that.

He believed in her wholeheartedly.

 _"Urano Metria!"_

All there was was a blinding light as all of that gathered energy came down on the target and everyone had to shield their eyes. They couldn't see anything – each sphere getting sent towards that one single location with all of that raw power.

Then it slowly faded, and all they could see was Lucy panting, her hands on her knees as she tried to remain standing. Both Gemini and Taurus returned to the Spirit World, and when Bickslow realised she'd done all of that while keeping two gates open, his jaw dropped. Literally. He was in complete shock, and hell, was he amazed.

But then, after what felt like an eternity and the silence was becoming deafening, her opponent fell to the ground with a slight thud, the dust gathering up around them slightly before it settled, and then, the crowd burst into a chorus of cheering and yelling.

Bickslow looked to the timer at the very top of the arena as Lucy was announced the winner, and his face split into a wide grin. Thirty goddamn seconds. Thirty goddamn seconds left on the clock but Lucy won. It wasn't a draw.

She'd won. Fair and square.

He turned to pick up the nearest person, who just happened to be Evergreen, and wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. "SHE FUCKING WON!" He shouted, not that it could be heard over the rest of the guild's cheering. Bickslow couldn't even begin to describe how proud he was, but hell, he knew she was going to win. She was strong, and she deserved to win.

But then when he looked back down to arena after putting down Evergreen, he lost his grin watching Lucy fall to her knees and then to her side. Turning and pushing past the rest of the guild behind him, he started running towards the small infirmary they were given for the course of the games. The rest of her team would no doubt be out there and taking her there already, but Bickslow was going to be there too.

Even though he was worried about her health, having obviously used up too much energy and power, he was so happy and so proud of Lucy that he really could not put it into words.

He'd believed in her and knew she could do it, and without any interference, she'd been able to. Yet again, she'd amazed him with just how strong she was and Bickslow couldn't be happier that he got to call such an amazing woman his girlfriend and love of his life.

* * *

 **Okay, so this is now officially the longest chapter for this fic (and any of my fics for that manner), and it's really only here because I needed a filler chapter here. I honestly cannot proof read this again, so if there's any errors, I apologise. If there's any that I see after this point that actually ruin it and cause things to not make sense, I should get around to fixing them soon. As usual.**

 **I'm so glad you guys liked the last chapter, especially when I teased you into thinking he was going to propose hehehe.**

 **As usual, thank you all so much for the reviews, and like I say every other time, I absolutely love reading them and they make me so incredibly happy.**

 **And as another warning, I apologise for any spoilers that occur in the next chapters. Like I said in the last chapter, there will be the post-Tartaros arc spoilers from the manga, but it will be stop there. No Alvarez arc spoilers here. With that, if you've read the manga, then you'll know that everything is pushed back a year, so the actual X792 games will become the X793 games... (you get that, right?). Just remember that I will be changing a lot of things for my own benefit and the sake of the story.**

 **Anyway, enough rambling about spoilers/sort of spoilers.**

 **I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I love you all for reading and reviewing!**

 **Until next time.**

 **\- April**


	38. Chapter 38

It came as no surprise to everyone (well, it came as a surprise to some people) that Fairy Tail came back to Magnolia with another trophy from their win at the Grand Magic Games. Sure, they'd only won by one single point, but it was a win, and they deserved it.

So like they did the year before after returning from Crocus, they partied, and they partied _hard_. But really, their celebrations weren't all that different from their usual ones, but when they had something so big to celebrate, they really did go all out. For an entire week, almost every single person in the guild was drunk. The entire time.

Bickslow ended up completely passed out on the floor more than once during the week, with his tongue hanging out on the not-so-clean guild floor. Lucy could only laugh and shake her head at her boyfriend, given that she was probably one of the only ones who didn't end up getting completely smashed every day.

That wasn't to say that she didn't end up getting a little intoxicated and sleeping on the guild floor at all that week, because she did, like everyone else had at some point.

But of course, most of the time she'd been sober _enough_ to head back to either her own apartment or Bickslow's, and with the help of her new spirit, Aquila, it was definitely easy.

Aquila was primarily a transport spirit, if you may. He wasn't an offensive spirit, but like all of her spirits, he had his uses and specialties. Aquila's was of course his wings. Broad wings sprouted from between his shoulder blades, each one the span of Lucy's entire height when outstretched. Not only could he fly great distances with those wings, but the perfectly blended brown, black, and grey feathers could form a barrier; he could protect someone when they were wrapped around them.

His strong, muscled arms could carry someone high above the treetops, and if need be, he could quite literally swoop down on someone and pick them up with his claw-like feet; the talons on each one digging in and causing an incredible amount of pain. Not only could Aquila whisk someone away to safety, but he could take an enemy anyway, if required.

But of course, in Lucy's state, she really just needed someone to help her get home so she didn't have to walk. Reaching into her pouch, she pulled out the newest addition to her spirit family, and with the silver key out before her, she funnelled her magic into it, visualising the gate in the empty space before her. As clearly as possibly, she shouted, "Open! Gate of the eagle! Aquila!"

Her newest spirit appeared in front her with a brief flash of golden light, his dark wings spreading about behind him as his white shoulder length hair blew gently in the wind. "How can I be of assistance, Princess?" Aquila asked, his voice crisp and strong.

Lucy giggled in her intoxicated state as she looked at her spirit; his lean arms were folded over the off-white fabric that made up the tunic that was only broken up by the golden metal belt around his waist. The lower half of his tunic was separated into two distance sections; a front and a back, and below that, grey pants that ended just below his knees, and it somewhat reminded Lucy of Bickslow's original armour. His orange eyes were piercing into her own, and under normal circumstances, she probably would have been feeling uncomfortable; he had a menacing aura to him. Between the sharp nose and alert eyes, you could tell he was a predator. Well, sort of. Lucy liked to think he was really just a big softie, from what she could tell, anyway.

"I need you to take me home, Aquila," she said.

He nodded. "Very well."

Lucy shivered from the draft from Aquila's strong wings as he slowly took flight, flying over her to come behind her, and then gently his hands came to grasp her at her sides, and slowly, he began to lift Lucy higher off the ground. She could hear the beating of his wings as he rose, and soon, they were gliding across the tops of the buildings. She loved feeling the wind in her hair and the cool breeze on her face. It was refreshing.

And even though she felt safe, having her new spirit hold her up above Magnolia as he took her home, it still wasn't her preferred method of transport. Because to that day, being in Bickslow's arms and on the babies was her favourite way of flying.

* * *

Eventually, the celebrations came to a close, and everyone slowly fell back into their original lives and routines. Just like with the previous year, the guild was getting swamped with job requests, because everyone wanted the help of the guild who had won the games; again.

But even though all was good for Fairy Tail, not everything was going as well in the magic world as a whole. Dozens upon dozens of past and current council members were being killed, and no one knew why. It was worrying everyone, and not just those who used magic.

On this particular morning, though, that was the farthest thing from Bickslow's thoughts. With all of the jobs that everyone was all but forced into taking, it meant Bickslow rarely had a chance to see Lucy, between her own team's jobs and his own.

On this particular morning, though, he got to see her. He got to see her face smiling back at him as soon as he opened his eyes, because for the first time in a little over three weeks, they'd both been in Magnolia at the same time and were able to spend more than an hour with each other before they had to head out.

"Morning, Bicks," she whispered before pressing a soft kiss to the end of his nose as his eyes slowly opened.

"Mmm, morning," he rasped with a small smile as he rolled onto his side. His hand was gently running down her side, over her waist and her hip before settling on her rear, and quickly pulled her in closer. With his hardening member between her thighs and pressed against her already slick folds, she hooked one leg around his hip, and as she rolled her own hips, a quiet moan escaped from her lips. Bickslow smirked as he leant forward just enough to have his lips brushing against hers, and as he did so, he whispered, "Do I have time?"

As Bickslow rocked his own hips slightly, his thick head teased her entrance, and she bit back another moan when he brushed over her clit again. "Only if… you make it quick," she murmured.

"In that case…" A wicked grin split his face as he quickly rolled Lucy onto her back, and with her leg still hooked around one side of his waist, he angled himself and eased into her. "I better get to it then."

Lucy could only nod as her head tipped back into the pillow, and she closed her eyes. Bickslow always knew what to do; he knew just how long to tease her before giving her want she wanted, and he knew just how to make her scream and be on the verge of seeing stars. And thankfully, Bickslow hadn't pushed her to her absolute limits when it came to teasing her, and instead was promptly working on the latter. Though, it probably had something to do with the fact that he really didn't have the time to tease her that morning, not when he had a job to go and do for the day.

He continued to snap his hips, burying himself completely in her core over and over again as he held onto her hips. Her moans and curses were some of his favourite sounds in the entire world, and each one was for him.

With another wicked grin, Bickslow leant down and captured her lips in a searing kiss, just as she opened her mouth to moan, and his tongue instantly slipped past and caressed her own. He could feel her walls tightening around him, and he was fighting his own climax off just so he could feel her shatter around him first; it was how he liked it best, and hell, how Lucy liked it best.

Quickly, he unhooked her leg from around his hip when he straightened up again, and grabbing her other leg behind her thigh, he brought them together and let her calves rest on one shoulder.

"Oh… fuck," she gasped, turning her head to the side when the new angle had her hips lifting off the bed slightly. "Just like that, oh god."

She closed her eyes again when she could feel the cord winding tighter and tighter inside of her, and she could feel every inch of Bickslow as he slowed his pace to long and languid strokes, rolling his hips against her heated core each time he became seated within her.

"Just like that?" he rasped, gently pressing his chest against the backs of her legs and pushing them forward slightly and rocking into her again.

"Fuck, yes," she moaned. "Please."

Bickslow bit back his own guttural moan as best he could when Lucy pressed her thighs together even more than they already were, and with her thigh muscles contracting and keeping them together as tight as possible, her sex clenched around his aching and swollen shaft even further. "Shit, baby," he groaned, feeling her walls flutter around his cock and grip him tightly, pulling him in even more as he rolled his hips and pushed down on her legs again. "You feel too fucking good."

Lucy felt like her entire body was on fire; the heat within her that continued to grow as she neared her end, and the heat from Bickslow. All of the desire and lust for him had sparked a fire within her that never truly went out, but when she had him like that – when he was filling her so completely and was as close to her as it was possible, that same fire intensified. But Lucy enjoyed that heat and that fire within her; she loved that carnal desire, and it was all for Bickslow.

It was all about the friction, the heat, and the contact. That's what it had always been about, and what it would always be about.

She could feel that same heat amassing within her even more, and she was so close to the edge and letting all of that passion wash over her. But she needed more.

"Harder."

Just one word, that's all she needed to say. One simple command and Bickslow would give her what she so desperately wanted and needed.

So when he began to slam into her again with one hand around her ankles and the other on her hip, and he groaned in response to her almost clamping down on him completely each time he was fully sheathed inside of her, Lucy's breaths came in shorter and sharper bursts between the moans that just got louder and louder. Each time his hips connected with her and he filled her so deeply, she gasped, and when the eager rhythm he'd set began to falter with his own impending orgasm, Lucy looked up through her heavy lidded eyes.

Bickslow was giving it everything he had just to keep his climax at bay, just for a little while longer. He knew Lucy was close; every single muscle in her body was going taut as she neared her peak, and he could see her chest heave quickly with each shallow breath.

It was all becoming too much, though; he was becoming completely overrun by the intense heat that rippled throughout him, and it was because of her. It was always because of her, and it was all for her. His overwhelming need and desire to be with her and be as close as humanly possible to her made it so. It was all of the heat and passion between them that made everything so good.

But then, when Bickslow was positive he wasn't going to be able to take any more of it – of Lucy – she let out a shout of his name and a string of curses, something that had always entertained him because she almost never swore. Her back arched from the bed as she tipped her head into the pillow again, and as she finally crested that peak, the dam within her bursting and letting all of that heat and passion go in crashing waves that washed over her, she felt every muscle that had been slowly filling with tension relax.

And as soon as she did finally reach that peak, Bickslow was only able to make sure he was buried within her constricting core as deep as possible, only rolling his hips against her when his entire body became flooded with that passion. He shuddered with a groan as he turned his head to press a kiss to her ankle, feeling her core continue to milk him for everything he was worth and keep him there within her.

With her sex still rippling around him and as Lucy quietly moaned from the pulsing heat still within her, he leant back just enough to let her put her feet back flat on the bed. Then, when his heart had stopped hammering in his chest and Lucy's laboured breaths had quieted down and had slowed, Bickslow leant forward over her with his chest pressed against hers and pulled her in for a slow kiss.

And airy chuckle left her lips when he pulled back, and as she lazily draped her arms around his neck, and her legs around his hips, he rolled her hips from where they were pinned beneath his own. As another slight shiver ran down his spine and he let out a quiet moan against her neck, she murmured in his ear, "So, if we were to get in the shower in the next, say… thirty seconds…"

A lazy grin spread across his lips as he lifted his head up, and swiftly, he pushed his arms under her back and wound them around her waist as she arched into him. Lucy giggled as he manoeuvred them to the edge of the bed, and as Bickslow stood, she crossed her ankles behind him, keeping herself pressed against his body.

"Say no more, Cosplayer," he grinned, letting his hands drop down over her ass and to the sides of her thighs. Bickslow was more than happy to go again – like always – so Lucy really didn't need to continue with that sentence, because he knew exactly what she was going to say. Besides, it worked in his favour; he got to take his girlfriend again, and he got a shower… also with his girlfriend, and really, he'd come to realise showering was definitely a lot more fun when there was someone else in there with you.

So really, he was fine with multi-tasking.

Completely fine.

* * *

"Bickslow, you're late."

The Seith mage grinned at the scowling Rune mage as he looked up from the chopping board. "Sorry, I had to pick up something on my way in," he said, taking the white apron from Evergreen when she handed it to him, and then walked around the main counter in the restaurant and over to Freed. After a quick glance around the room, he raised an eyebrow under his visor and turned to Evergreen again. "Where's Laxus?"

"Out getting some supplies," she said with a shrug.

"Don't count on him coming back then," Bickslow scoffed as he walked over to the large industrial stove and peered into the large steel pot. "He's probably already lost."

"That's very true," Freed agreed, glancing up from the vegetables he was chopping up quickly. Their fearless leader may have been smart (well, it was debatable sometimes), but he wasn't the best when it came to directions. Quite often, Laxus would find himself somewhere he shouldn't be, and despite growing up in Magnolia, he still got lost occasionally in the town he'd always called home.

When it came to fights, on the other hand… well, he could find those without a single problem. In fact, he seemed to be drawn to them. The Raijinshuu could only wonder if it was a Dragon Slayer thing, because each and every single Dragon Slayer they'd met (regardless of generation), they'd all had an attraction to trouble and fights. Wendy was the exception to that, not that it was surprising.

So as Evergreen sighed and went back to waiting tables, Bickslow looked over his shoulder to Freed as he continued gently stirring the soup in front of him. "I picked the ring up today," he said with a wide grin.

"I'm assuming that's why you were late?" Freed asked.

"Yup," he nodded. And it really was why he'd been late. Well, his shower had been longer than anticipated, not that he was complaining, nor would he ever complain. But as soon as he had been able to leave his apartment, he'd had to visit a certain jewellery store on the opposite side of town, and that was only because the ring he'd bought for Lucy had come back in after being resized.

It was the ring he was going to use to propose, and just feeling it in the pocket of his orange chef's uniform – the same orange uniform for the staff at 8-Island – he was making him almost giddy. Bickslow was so excited and he couldn't wait until he actually got to ask the question.

But he still had to wait a few more weeks, because he wanted to make their one-year anniversary as special and memorable as he could. Hopefully, asking her to marry him was going to do just that. Bickslow could only hope she'd say yes, but by that point, he was entirely convinced she would.

He just had to wait a few more weeks, and then he'd know for sure that he was going to spend the rest of his life with her.

And up until that point in time, Freed was the only other person Bickslow had told about what he was doing. Freed knew he'd told Lucy he was going to ask her to marry him – one day – and he'd known since before the games. Bickslow had needed to tell someone about his plans, just because if he didn't, he was surely going to burst from keeping it all to himself.

He couldn't tell Laxus, because he'd tell Mira and Mira would freak out, and Bickslow couldn't have that. He couldn't tell Evergreen, because she'd probably freak out and tell Elfman who would end up telling Mira, and Mira would freak out. Again. And Bickslow couldn't really tell Gajeel either, because hell, if he didn't let it slip to the whole guild, then he'd no doubt tell Levy, who would probably and most likely end up telling Cana at some point, and then the entire guild would be aware he was going to propose to Lucy.

And they'd _all_ freak out, Mira included.

It really just left Freed, because Bickslow knew he could keep a secret, and there was no way in hell that Bickslow was going to tell any of Lucy's team. Though, he was aware that he at least needed to ask them if he could ask her to marry him… he'd get around to that, eventually.

So of course, he'd actually had Freed come with him to the jewellery store one afternoon when Lucy was out on a job, just because Bickslow wanted to choose something that she'd absolutely love. Sure, he'd bought her jewellery before and she still wore both the necklace and bracelet (that now had two more charms on it; one being a small golden cup, representing her win at the games, and another a small white-gold star with white gems on one side) every day, but a ring was different. Hell, just the type of ring it was was making it different.

When it came to the finer things in life, Freed was the one Bickslow had always gone to for advice. When it came to all things fancy and the proper etiquette, Freed had all the answers. Bickslow needed his opinion, though, and that was why he'd brought him alone to choose the ring in the first place. He needed Freed to tell him if what he thought was nice was actually indeed nice, and whether or not he thought Lucy would like it.

But as it turns out, Bickslow didn't really need Freed's help. He was still glad to have him along for the ride, but his opinions were almost irrelevant, because whatever Freed thought was nice and what he thought Lucy might like, Bickslow almost hated. Well, it wasn't that he actually hated them, it was just that none were really what he was looking for. He wanted the perfect ring for the perfect girl, and no matter how many rings he stared at and how long he stared at them, none of them were the one he wanted to propose with.

But then he found it, when he was extremely frustrated with having wasted almost an entire afternoon in just one jewellery store. He saw the perfect ring for the perfect girl, and as soon as he saw it, he just knew that that was the one he was going to propose with.

It wasn't too simple, and it wasn't too extravagant. A thin, twisting silver band that had the two strands encrusted with tiny white diamonds, and in the centre of the band was a single diamond.

It was the perfect ring for the perfect girl, and as soon as Bickslow had seen it, he'd pointed to it and bought it, much to the sales clerk's relief, having finally decided on the ring.

But of course, he'd needed to get it resized, because just by looking at it, Bickslow knew it was going to slip right off her finger. When it came to the new sizing, he'd just guessed, really. He figured it was close, but in the event it didn't fit, then it would just get resized again. No big deal.

So Freed smiled at Bickslow as he piled all of the chopped vegetables into a pot, scraping the knife down the board. "I'm sure she'll love it, Bickslow."

"I know she will." And Bickslow really did know Lucy would love it. Just thinking about it had him excited again, and he really, really could not wait to propose.

So the Raijinshuu went about their tasks for the day; Freed was preparing the food, Bickslow was plating it (mostly with the help of the babies), and Evergreen was waiting on tables. It was an odd job for them, sure, but like the year before, Bickslow and Freed had complained about the influx of difficult jobs, so working at 8-Island for the day wasn't that bad.

Bickslow glanced up to the ex council member who was sitting on the bench in the middle with his legs crossed under him. Bickslow looked to the newspaper in his hands, and he frowned when he saw the headline for the day: Era had been destroyed in a mysterious bombing and the main council members had all been murdered.

It was really quite disturbing, to say the least. Even though it had the farthest thing from his mind that same morning, it was now the first thing in his mind. One by one, the council was getting killed off, and no one knew why.

But when the door the restaurant opened a little while later and they heard the heavy footsteps on the hardwood floor, they stopped their slightly uncomfortable on the magic council and the possible reason behind the deaths. They all looked up and towards the door with smiles on their faces, expecting to see the hulking silhouette of their fearless leader, but as soon as they realised it wasn't, their faces dropped.

Because it wasn't Laxus.

"Rumble."

* * *

 **Sigh. I feel like I should have included more from the the entire restaurant conversation, because I really had like nothing of it, but I didn't really want to. If you want to know what they talk about with Yajima, go watch the anime or read the manga. :P**

 **I know this chapter is a little shorter than what I usually have for this story, but I really wanted to end this here, just because the next chapter is going to be a bit longer and I didn't want to make this one super long... so instead, it's two chapters instead of one. And, it actually works out better that way, because Chapter 40 will essentially mark the beginning of the second 'part,' if you may. A nice, even number works out.**

 **As usual, there's always things I miss when proof-reading, and this/these chapter/s are so hard to write at the moment, especially with my focus being centred on _A Peculiar Situation_ at the moment. So like I always say, I'll try my best to correct any other errors or mistakes I see in the next couple of days. **

**With that, I say thank you for the reviews on the last chapter! It was long, and a lot happened, but it was fun to write. And like I always say at the end of my chapters, I love love love reading the reviews, so please, if you can, leave them! I love knowing what you think! (Even if it's just to point out what made you cringe... _*cough* lemon *cough*_ )**

 **Until next time... and I say that, because really, I have no idea when the next chapter will be up, and I don't even know which story I'll be updating next... too many things to work on, not enough time.**

 **Anyway! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **\- April**


	39. Chapter 39

**I'm just going to put it out there that there's possible triggers later in the chapter... so consider this a trigger warning.**

* * *

Bickslow thought he'd experienced the worst kind of pain a person could ever go through. He thought being tortured by Thorne while having a piece of metal running through his side would be the most painful thing he'd ever have to experience, if that wasn't Lucy's screams from being tortured, but he'd been wrong.

Because what he felt then was so much worse. It was pain the likes of which no one should ever have to experience, and in that moment, as he lay there on the infirmary bed he vaguely knew he was on, Bickslow would seriously rather be dead.

He would prefer to die than have to feel another second of what he was feeling.

He felt as if every bone, every organ, every muscle, every goddamn cell in his entire body was trying to rip itself apart, all at once, and continually. His entire body was screaming at him, begging for it to stop, but Bickslow couldn't do a damn thing. He couldn't do a damn thing about the blinding, near searing pain that coursed throughout him, and no one could.

But he just wanted it to end. More than anything he wanted it all to end, and he didn't care how it happened.

He couldn't move, because he couldn't think. Nothing was working anymore. Not his muscles, not his brain; nothing. But even if he did want to think or move, he couldn't anyway, because the pain was that bad that it consumed him entirely. He wanted the searing heat and pain to end, because it was too much for him.

He was useless, lying there on that bed. He couldn't do a damn thing. No magic, no movement. Nothing. Just nothing.

The worst part was that he couldn't even sleep through it, so he was stuck there, mostly conscious and with his eyes closed, leaving him to focus on nothing but the pain; the unbearable pain that had him wishing he was dead.

And Lucy hated seeing Bickslow like that. She hated seeing him in pain, and it hurt her to not be able to reach out and touch him; to hold him to let him know that she was there, right beside him. She couldn't do it, because the barest of touches to anywhere on his sweat-covered and hotter-than-the-sun skin had him flinching.

The gentlest of touches was causing him more pain, and that was the last thing Lucy wanted to be doing.

But she'd been sitting there beside him since they'd all been brought into the guild late that same morning, and she'd been in a constant state of worry ever since. They were all so hurt and injured, and no one knew if they were going to make it out of this one – especially Laxus.

She'd been so lost in that moment, thinking of and watching Bickslow right before her, that she barely noticed the piles of tattered clothes on a small table at the end of the bed, just like she didn't register Gajeel walking in, for once without a smirk or a scowl.

He came to stand at the end of Bickslow's bed, his face masked with his concern, for both his best friend and Lucy. The two had seen each other seriously hurt more times than anyone should have to, especially in just a year. Gajeel really didn't know how he'd react if he ever had to see Levy like that, and he didn't want Levy to ever feel like Lucy was in that moment. Ever.

He knew Bickslow and Lucy had been through more together in just a year than anyone knew, because there were some things they'd had to deal with on their own and without the guild's interference. But, no matter how many terrible things they go through, they'd still mean more to each other than any other person could, and Gajeel could see that. He'd seen how devastated and miserable Lucy had been following the events with Throne's Deceit, and he'd seen how worried Bickslow had been when Lucy had been hurt at the games.

They were the centre of each other's worlds, and Gajeel could see that.

It was probably why there was a small box peeking out from under the tattered orange clothes on the table at the end of the bed, and Gajeel knew exactly what it was. He glanced back up to Lucy to see if she was still facing towards Bickslow, which she was, and then looked back down, slowly taking the black velvet box and putting it in his own pocket. He reasoned Lucy hadn't seen it yet, and he figured that Bickslow would be thankful if he held onto it for a while to make sure Lucy didn't find out, because Gajeel had enough common sense to know that that kind of thing was something he'd definitely want to keep a secret, until he was obviously ready to actually ask the girl to marry him.

He'd just hold on to it until Bickslow was better, along with the rest of his team. Bickslow had to get better, though. He just had to.

For Lucy.

He looked back up to the blonde sitting on the chair right next to the bed, and softly, he said, "Lucy, master needs you outside." For once, he wasn't going to use his preferred name for her. Not today.

"I don't want to leave," she mumbled.

"I know you don't, but sitting here ain't gonna help either of you."

"But…" She didn't know how to go on with that sentence, because deep down, she knew Gajeel was right. Sitting there, she couldn't help Bickslow, and if anything, it was making things worse for herself. Because the longer she sat there, the more she worried, and the stronger that nagging feeling in the back of her head about the possibility of Bickslow not making it out became.

And she really needed Bickslow to make it out of this one.

She couldn't keep thinking about that, though. She had to stop, because just like she had been the last time he'd been gravely injured, she wasn't ready to be in a world where Bickslow no longer existed. She would never be ready for that world, because she loved him too much. In just a year, he had become her entire world; he was her reason to smile and the main cause of her happiness. Lucy never wanted to lose that.

But, Gajeel was right. It wasn't helping herself or Bickslow by sitting there, because without an antidote, he was just going to get worse. She needed to help him, and if that meant leaving his side to help the rest of the guild, then so be it.

So with a sigh and a final forlorn glance to Bickslow, she stood up from the chair slowly, and turned for the door with Gajeel following behind her. She had to believe in Porlyusica. She had to believe that the guild would be able to get a blood sample from whoever or whatever it was that had caused four of their members to be lying in the infirmary, and that they'd be able to get a cure for the poisoning before it was too late.

She had to believe that they could do it.

* * *

Bickslow pushed himself from the bed to sit up with a groan. Everything ached, and there was still that residual searing pain inside every single muscle – hell, every cell. He had no idea how long he'd been like that, lying there in pain, but it had gotten to the point where he was constantly drifting in and out of consciousness. He'd lost his concept of time, because all he'd known was pain the likes of which he'd never experienced for every second of every day.

But when he was finally able to move, and he could feel the magic power within him slowly fill up and return, he instantly began to panic.

Lucy wasn't there.

And Bickslow could only think that something had happened to her; she'd been hurt (or worse) in the war with Tartaros that he knew was going on. In his semi-conscious bouts, he'd been aware of the fighting going on around him, and he'd heard bits and piece of conversations, and it was why he wasn't all that surprised to be waking up in his own bed in his own house, because he knew the guild had been destroyed.

But when he got his bearings and he was sitting up, he looked around his dim room, and then to the door. Gajeel had just come in and was leaning on the doorframe with his arms folded, watching the Seith mage with concern in his eyes.

"Where's Lucy?" Bickslow asked quietly, his voice hoarse. Then, wincing from the ache in his muscles from moving again, he slowly turned himself to sit on the edge of the bed, and let his feet rest on the floor.

"You shouldn't be moving yet," Gajeel said calmly. As Bickslow pushed himself to his feet haphazardly, he rushed over to the side of the bed to steady the Seith mage before he fell. "Woah, woah. Dude, you really need to take it easy. Those Magical Barrier Particles do some serious damage."

Bickslow rubbed at his face as he heavily fell back down to the bed. Everything was weak, his head was pounding, and he could barely move without getting dizzy at is was. But he was confused. Bickslow didn't know what was going on; why was Gajeel in his apartment, and where the hell was Lucy?

"Can you at least get me some water?" And as Gajeel nodded and turned for the door, Bickslow looked around his room. Everything looked the same as the last time he'd seen it, and he had no idea when that was. His cloak hung on the back of the door, the book Lucy was currently reading still sat on the nightstand on the opposite side of the bed, and the towels from the shower were peeking out of the hamper just next to the wardrobe.

But then he saw the same box with the same ring he was going to propose with sitting on his own nightstand, and his eyes went wide. What was it doing there? He could remember it had been in his pocket before the Tartaros member destroyed the restaurant and they'd attempted to fight him, but… after that, he wasn't quite sure. Most of everything after that point had only really been in bits and pieces. But what if Lucy had seen it? What if Lucy knew that he was planning on proposing soon, and she realised she wasn't ready to say yes yet, and that's why she wasn't there?

 _Fuck_.

"Here," the Dragon Slayer mumbled as he came back into the room and walked back around to where Bickslow sat on the bed, and held the glass of water out to him. When Bickslow didn't immediately take the glass, Gajeel realised his attention was transfixed on something else, and he followed the Seith mage's gaze. Then, once he saw just what it was that had caused such a panic-stricken look on Bickslow's face when he did finally reach for the glass, he said with a shrug, "Oh, yeah… it was in amongst the clothes once they brought you into the guild. Figured you didn't want Bunny-girl to see it so I looked after it for ya."

"So… Lucy doesn't know about it?"

"Nope. No one else does, either. I didn't think you'd want anyone knowing."

Bickslow nodded as he took a long sip. So Lucy didn't know about the ring, and no one else did, because Gajeel had made sure it remained a secret. And really, it was one less thing he had to worry about.

He reached out to place the glass on the nightstand, and then opened the draw to slide the box into it. He didn't need to worry about that, because he still had weeks to go… assuming Lucy was fine, which, at that point, he still didn't know, and it was the thing he was worried about most.

So looking back up to Gajeel as he rubbed the back of his arm idly in attempt to relieve the throbbing ache in the muscles, he asked, "Is she okay though? Did she… is she hurt?"

"Uh… well…" Gajeel muttered, tearing his gaze from Bickslow's as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. He really didn't want to be having that conversation, but he had to. He had to let Bickslow know what he was getting into whenever he saw her next.

And Bickslow was back to panicking then. It should have been a simple yes or no answer, not mumbling and avoiding the question. "Where the hell is she?" he growled, suddenly rising to his feet and doing his best to ignore the sudden dizziness again.

But as soon as he'd stood, Gajeel had pushed him back down to sit on the edge of the bed, and he kept him there by keeping his hands on his shoulders. "She's in her apartment, alright?" he said, and when Bickslow made to stand again, Gajeel pushed down on his shoulders again. "No, Bicks, listen to me. You're not goin' anywhere, at least not until you've listened to me."

"What the fuck happened? What's going on?"

"Promise me you'll stay and listen to everything I've gotta say." Gajeel said quietly. And when Bickslow saw nothing but complete seriousness in his eyes, he nodded slowly and stopped resisting, and looked down at his hands as Gajeel slumped down on the bed right next to him. "Right, listen, Evergreen and Freed said they heard small pieces of what was going on around them. What do you know?" he asked.

Bickslow's brow furrowed as he racked his brain and tried to gather up all of the information he knew. They were just small fragments of conversations, but they were enough to clue him in on what had been going on. So, shaking his head lightly, he mumbled, "I… I don't know much. I know it was Tartaros… and I know that the guild was destroyed. There was lots of fighting going on… I could hear it, but… not much else."

Gajeel nodded thoughtfully. "So you really were conscious for parts of it?"

"Yeah, but I still don't know what day it is. How long was I… how long was I like this?" he asked quietly.

"Nearly two weeks," Gajeel said. "I told you those particles did a number on you. Granny had to put you lot under once we got the blood from that asshole that did it in the first place. She said somethin' about the antidote being just as dangerous and that it was going to cause you all a hell of a lot more pain."

Bickslow looked up. "Two weeks? But… I…" _Shit. Has it really been that long?_ Bickslow could have guessed a week, but nearly two? But, if he'd been made to be unconscious for part of that, then it wasn't really all that surprising.

"Yeah, it's been a while," Gajeel said with a shrug, and then, his entire demeanour changed. Something softer crossed his face, and it made Bickslow worry all the more. He could tell what Gajeel had to tell him was going to be something he didn't want to hear, but… he had to hear it, because he knew it involved Lucy. He had to know it, no matter what _it_ was. So after a long pause where Gajeel tried his best to form the words in his head, he continued softly, "Look, Lucy's… okay, I think… She took a beating, but you know the girl better than anyone, and you know she usually bounces back."

"You said _usually_. She always comes back. Not usually… _always_."

Gajeel cursed himself under his breath as he rubbed the back of his neck again, looking away from Bickslow's piercing gaze. He was quickly losing his patience, and Gajeel knew he was running out of time to say what he had to say.

"Yeah, sorry, I know she does. Bunny's strong like that, I get it," he said, the corner of his lips lifting up into the smallest of smiles as he tried to reassure the Seith mage. But he knew no matter how much he tried, it wasn't going to help. "She… she kinda saved all of our asses, but… she had to sacrifice something… "

"What the fuck happened?" Bickslow asked as calmly as possibly. He was having a hard time trying to stop his racing heart, and the longer it took for him to find out just what had happened, the more he began to panic. Bickslow wasn't sure if it was possible to panic any more than he was at that point, because it was so bad, that he could feel his chest tightening even more with each passing second.

Bickslow didn't want to think about what it was she would have had to sacrifice to save everyone – and it was something he didn't doubt, because whenever the guild as a whole managed to get in trouble, Lucy was always there to at least help with roping them out of it – because he knew it would be something that was incredibly important to her. Because that's just what sacrifices were; they were the things you love more than anything that you give up on, because you had to save something else you love; _someone_ else you love.

But he needed to know. He needed to know what it was she'd lost so he could help her without screwing things up even more.

"She had to break one of her keys to summon the Celestial Spirit King," Gajeel said softly. "She sacrificed one of her spirits to save everyone else."

Bickslow closed his eyes as he dropped his head and clasped his hands behind his neck. "Which one." And he'd spoken the words so quietly that Bickslow himself had barely been able to hear it, but he knew Gajeel could. It wasn't even a question; it was a demand, almost. He needed to know which key she'd had to break. He needed to know which spirit she'd had to give up.

And even though Bickslow knew Lucy loved all of her spirits equally, he also knew that there were a few that she really did hold more dear than the rest. There was a part of him that knew it didn't really matter which one she'd lost, because the point was that she'd had to give up something – _someone_ – she loved for the guild.

But… it was the fact he knew there were some that were more special to her than he could ever understand that made him ask which one she'd had to give up.

"Aquarius."

And as soon as Gajeel had uttered that one name, Bickslow shot to his feet again, and he was thankful that the dizziness had subsided, and that Gajeel hadn't stopped him from moving.

* * *

For a week and a half, Lucy had been curled up in a ball on her bed and staring out at the town, watching through her window as it got rebuilt around her. Her street was one of the few that hadn't been totally destroyed, and that included her apartment. With the guild building gone, she'd needed somewhere to go; she needed to be home, because she couldn't bear to look at Bickslow.

And it was the first time she'd ever felt that way. But… she knew that he'd be okay. Porlyusica had been able to use Tempester's blood to make a cure, and as soon as she'd put them all in a coma, just so the treatment could do its work, Lucy had left. Bickslow had people looking after him, and Lucy knew he'd be fine.

Ever since the war the Tartaros had come to an end, all Lucy had felt was pain, and it was only a couple of days after it had all ended did she shut herself off from everyone and everything. She couldn't see anyone… she just couldn't. She needed to be alone, and for the first time in a long time, she relished that.

But for the week and a half she'd been curled up on her bed, she hadn't _entirely_ been alone. She'd had Wendy with her for a lot of it, and that was just because the young Dragon Slayer was helping her with her healing. Everyone else, though, she couldn't see.

No Natsu, no Erza, no Gray, no Levy, and definitely no Bickslow.

Out of everyone, she loved Bickslow the most, but he was the last person she wanted to see.

But at the same time, he was the one she needed the most. Bickslow would _always_ be the one she needed the most. It was just that she really could not be around him right then, because she didn't want to lie to him, and she knew that the more time she spent with him, the harder it would be to keep the truth from him.

And more than anything, she didn't want him to know that truth, because she didn't want him to be hurt over it. She wanted to deal with that pain alone, and if possible, she would keep that truth to herself as long as she possibly could.

The truth wasn't that she'd had to sacrifice Aquarius to help save the guild, because the entire guild knew about that. No, it was much worse, in Lucy's opinion.

It was that she'd been pregnant, and she'd kept it from Bickslow. She'd kept it from Bickslow because she'd only known for a week before everything with Tartaros had happened; because Bickslow had been hurt. But in hindsight, she hadn't had a chance to tell him, because they'd both been so busy with their teams and missions, that the night before he'd been hurt had been the first time they'd actually spent some decent time together since the games.

She'd actually been out on a job when she'd found out, because she was late, and that never happened. Like clockwork, her satanic friend would show up, every month. Never early, never late; she'd show up when she was supposed to. But, that month, she was late, and instantly, her mind had jumped to the possibility of being pregnant.

And three tests and then a blood test later, she'd realised she was. But at that point, she'd still had another week until she got back to Magnolia, so until she did – until she got to see Bickslow again – it would just have to remain her little secret.

But it remained her little secret longer than she'd expected, because when she did arrive in Magnolia again, she realised that it wasn't something you mumbled into a pillow. She'd need to make sure it was the right time, so she'd just have to wait for that moment to occur.

But that moment never occurred, and it was precisely why she couldn't be around Bickslow. She'd never gotten the chance to tell Bickslow that she was pregnant and that they were having a baby – granted, much earlier than she'd planned – because they weren't.

She'd lost the baby, and for a week and a half, she'd been curled up on her bed and just waiting for it to finally end so she could move on. Wendy was the only other person in the entire world that knew, and that was only because she'd happened to be there with her during it; when Lucy had realised what was happening and she'd curled up in a ball on the bathroom floor, clutching her stomach in pain. Lucy had had no choice in telling Wendy.

But it hurt more than Lucy had expected. Not physically, but emotionally. In such a short amount of time, Lucy had not only lost one of her most cherished spirits, someone she'd known and loved her entire life, but her baby, too. As soon as she'd gotten over the initial shock of being pregnant, it had been ripped away from her, right when she'd started to get excited about the next chapter of her life, and who it would be.

She didn't want Bickslow to know the pain that she was in, not when he'd already been through enough of his own. She didn't want Bickslow to know about it at all, because she didn't want him to hate her; blame her, even. Because somewhere, deep down, she felt guilty. Her body was supposed to have been a safe, nurturing environment, but it hadn't been. How could she not feel guilty when she thought of it that way?

But for a week and a half, she was (mostly) alone with her thoughts, and each day, she thought of Bickslow. The fact she couldn't be around him right then was irrelevant, because the point still remained that Bickslow was the person she loved most in that world, and she was still worried about him. She was worried about his health, even if she knew he was in safe hands.

And still, despite the fact she didn't know how long she'd be able to lie to him about the pregnancy, Lucy still needed him. She needed him to be at her side and tell her that everything would get better so she could go back to being happy, even if he didn't know all of what was going on.

She needed him to be by her side again, one day, when he woke up, because she needed to move on. She needed to get back to her old life and be happy again. She had to believe that it was possible to be happy again.

So when she heard her apartment door get thrown open one day, nearly two weeks after everything had happened, and then someone running across the room, she didn't even turn to see who it was, because she knew exactly who it was as soon as she'd felt those same familiar arms wrap around her. Instinctively, she pressed herself to them as much as she could, and as she was lifted up gently to sit in their lap, she buried her face against the warm chest.

When the soothing words she'd needed to hear the most finally reached her ears, she let the tears fall again.

Right then, it didn't matter that she hated herself for lying to him and not telling him the truth of what had happened, because more than anything, she just needed him to be there. She needed to hear Bickslow tell her that everything would be okay, and that he was there for her.

She needed Bickslow, despite the pain it caused.

* * *

The weeks rolled by, and even though they both wished it had all been in a blur, it wasn't. The weeks that followed were slow and painful, for both Bickslow and Lucy.

Their one-year anniversary came and went, but they didn't celebrate it. The ring stayed in the nightstand beside Bickslow's bed, and he didn't think about it at all. He couldn't propose, not then, and with the way things were going, he was sure he was never going to.

For weeks, Bickslow had watched Lucy close herself off from the world, and how she slowly retreated into herself. She was distant, and there wasn't anything Bickslow could do to help.

For weeks, Bickslow sat in her apartment, day in and day out, trying his best to help her through whatever it was she was going through. But no matter how much he tried, he couldn't make her happy. He didn't know how long it had been since he'd seen her smile, and that sparkle in her eyes was gone. It broke his heart to see Lucy so miserable, so depressed, and the fact that he couldn't do anything about it was making it all so much worse.

He wasn't even sleeping at night, that's how worried he was. Most nights, he got sent back to his own house and to his own bed, but… all he did was stay up and worry about her.

He'd watched as everything important in her life slowly disappeared; the guild had disbanded, much to everyone's shock, and even though they'd all protested it, the guild didn't exist. In their hearts, Fairy Tail would always live on, because they were a family, and that's just what it meant to be in Fairy Tail, but… physically and legally, it was gone. The building wasn't getting repaired along with the rest of the town, and it remained a giant pile of rubble on the edge of town, and whenever someone walked past it, they frowned. The guild had been the heart of the town, and without it, Magnolia just wasn't the same, and everyone knew it.

But there wasn't anyone could do about it.

He'd watched as Natsu suddenly announced he was going off to train for a year, and he'd seen how Lucy broke just that little bit more. He'd watched how slowly, everyone else had gone their separate ways, needing to get a fresh start on life now that the guild was gone, and with each person that disappeared from Lucy's life, the more distant she became.

And the longer Bickslow watched Lucy, the more he became aware of just what it was he needed to do; what it was she also needed to do.

Lucy needed to move on like everyone else was. She needed to go and have a life; she needed to be happy again. But she wasn't going to get that in Magnolia, and she wasn't going to get that with him, because Bickslow knew he couldn't make her happy anymore. All he'd done is try to help her and make her happy again, but all of his efforts were in vain.

Somewhere in his mind, Bickslow knew that if he left, then it would give Lucy the push she needed to go and live her life. More than anything, he wanted her to be happy again, but while she was in Magnolia, that was never going to happen. She had to leave. She had to move on.

Bickslow had to let her move on. He had to let her move on from him.

Because when you love someone, you let them go.

And Bickslow was never going to love someone as much as he loved Lucy. She was the love of his life; the only woman he was ever going to love, and even though it was going to completely destroy him to leave her, he knew it would be the right thing to do. No matter what, he would still love her until the day he dies.

Always.

Bickslow would always love Lucy, just like she would always love him. Lucy would never love anyone like she loved Bickslow, but she knew what was coming. She knew she was pulling away with each passing day, and she knew that it was hurting Bickslow.

She knew what was eventually going to happen, but she wouldn't cry until it was night and Bickslow had gone back to his own house. Lucy wasn't going to let him see her cry then, because she knew it was just going to make him worry about her more.

All he'd done since waking up from his coma was worry and be there for her. He'd put aside his own health problems to help her with all of her pain from losing Aquarius and the baby, not that he was aware of the latter. He'd never be aware of that.

And even though Lucy still hated the fact she'd been lying to him the entire time, when every day, he'd been sitting there right beside her, she'd still needed him. As much as she didn't want to see him just because she was scared of the possibility of the truth coming out, she'd needed him, like she always did.

He'd helped her with her pain, and for a few brief moments, she'd been happy. Or close to it, at least.

But when she'd thought she was getting better, and that she was ready to leave her apartment and face the world again, the universe had thrown her another curveball. The guild, Natsu, the rest of her friends… it had felt like she'd taken one step forward, just to take two _hundred_ steps back. That light at the end of the tunnel was getting further and further away, and Lucy was almost certain she was never going to be happy again.

Too much had happened. She'd had too much taken away from her in such a short period of time that her life felt almost empty. All that was left was Bickslow, and even then, she could tell it wasn't the same. Something had changed between them after everything with the guild and her friends and team, and she was vaguely aware that it was all her doing.

She was aware that it was her own fault she was losing Bickslow, because every time he'd tried to reach out to help her, she'd ignored it. He was doing everything in his power to make her happy again, but she wasn't letting any of it get to her.

And after a while, it wasn't just her who was pulling away, but it was Bickslow, too. It was then that Lucy really did realise what was coming, and she knew it was going to be soon.

That wasn't to say she was ready for it, because she really was not, and she didn't think she ever would be. She would never be ready to have a life where she didn't have Bickslow, but… with the way things were, she knew that's the kind of life she was going to have to deal with. She'd have to learn to live in a world without the love of her life.

But when the day finally came, Lucy knew it. Lucy knew exactly what was going on as soon as Bickslow had walked into her apartment with his usual clothes on, and his visor tucked under his arm. She could feel her heart sink as he slowly walked over to where she sat on the bed and knelt down in front of her and took her hands gently.

He'd been putting the day off for as long as possible, because more than anything, he didn't want to do it. He wanted to be selfish and keep Lucy in his life forever, like he'd originally planned on doing.

But he couldn't do that. If he was selfish, then neither of them would be happy. He could live with his own unhappiness and misery if it meant Lucy got a chance of having her own happiness again, one day. And maybe, once Bickslow knew that Lucy was happy, then he'd be happy again, because after all, she was the sole reason for his own happiness.

But today was quite possibly the worst day of his life, and if it weren't for his team standing right outside her building and waiting for him, then he wouldn't be looking at Lucy right then. Evergreen and Freed had convinced him it was the right thing to do, and it wasn't something any of them were taking lightly. His team knew just how much it was going to devastate Bickslow to do that – Freed knew more than anyone just how much it was going to hurt, because after all, he knew Bickslow had planned on proposing – but they also knew that if Bickslow was willing to leave the love of his life, then it was the right thing.

Because if it wasn't the last option available, he wouldn't be doing it. Everyone knew that.

So as he stared up at the love of his life, the one he was saying goodbye to, he had to remind himself that he was making the right decision. The pain he was going to cause was only going to be temporary. One day, she'd be happy again, and she'd have the life that he wanted her to have.

"Lucy, you know I love you more than anything in the entire world," he said softly as the corners of his mouth pulled up into a sad smile.

And it had begun. It was really happening, and Lucy couldn't stop herself from crying. "B-Bicks… please d-don't do this…" she whispered. It didn't matter that she knew it was happening, because she wasn't ready to lose Bickslow. She wasn't ready for it to end.

But it was. And there was nothing she could do to stop it. She knew that.

"I don't want to be doing this, trust me on that. This is the last thing I ever wanted to be doing," he said as he let go of one of her hands to brush his thumb across her cheek, cupping her face in one hand. "But I have to do it. I'm doing this for you, Lucy."

She wanted to be mad; she wanted to slap his hands away from her and yell at him, because she couldn't understand how leaving her was for her benefit. "P-please…" was all she could choke out around her sobs.

He could feel his own tears well up then, and he had to blink them back just so he didn't completely lose it. Bickslow knew it was going to be hard, but it was so much harder than he'd expected.

He was sure it was going to the hardest thing he'd ever have to do in his entire life, and somewhere, and somehow, he was a little glad that he'd only ever have to do it once. He'd never have to leave someone he loved again, because he was never going to love a single person as much as he does Lucy. He was never going to love anyone again.

Never.

"Lucy, I know you're not happy, and it breaks my heart to see you like this. I've watched you for so long, and I've tried so hard just to see your smile again. I've done everything I can think of to make you happy, but I've realised that no matter how many crazy things I can come up with, I'm never going to be able to do that. I'm never going to be able to make you happy again."

She choked on another sob as she pried her other hand away to wipe away tears that never stopped rolling down her cheeks. "Bicks, p-please. Y-you can, I-I promise…" she pleaded, regardless of knowing that he was right. Somewhere, deep down, she knew Bickslow was right, and she could feel another splinter run down her heart when she admitted that to herself. She didn't want to believe that the person she loved most wouldn't be able to make her happy again, but she had to believe it.

"I can't, Lucy, and you know I can't," he said softly. "It's why I'm doing this. I want you to be happy, Lucy. More than anything, that's all I want. If I do this, if I leave, then you'll be able to move on. You'll be able to go and live a life full of joy and you'll be able to be happy again."

"I'm n-not going t-to g-get that w-without y-you…"

"Yes you will. One day, you're going to be happy again, and it's going to because of this." He had to believe that, because if that wasn't the case, then Bickslow would have made the biggest mistake of his entire life by leaving Lucy. So then, taking her hands again and shifting his weight on his feet slightly, he looked back up to the blonde, and softly, he said, "Alright, Lucy. You need to listen to me now, alright?" When she nodded, he smiled again sadly, and just for a brief second. He needed to wrap it up; he needed to get it over with, because the longer he stayed there, the harder it got. "After I'm gone, you're going to finally leave Magnolia, and you're going to go live somewhere else. You're going to go travel Fiore – hell, the world – and you're going to settle down somewhere that doesn't hold so many bad memories.

"You're going to go live your dream, and you'll become a best-selling author. You're going to go do something that you love doing and makes you smile.

"You're going to find a guy that's not a total moron and doesn't have a kickass Mohawk, and you're going to fall in love with him, and then you're gonna have kids, and you're gonna have your own family," he said, his voice cracking towards the end as his vision became blurry from the tears. Bickslow was giving up all of that; he was giving up the life he wanted to have. He was sacrificing it all for Lucy's happiness, and if she really did find that happiness, then it would be worth it.

But at the mention of a family – of having kids – Lucy felt a sharp pang of pain in her heart. She still wasn't over miscarrying, and she knew she never would be. It was always going to be something she'd remember, and she'd remember how much pain she'd been in when it had happened and she'd realised what was going on.

Most of all, she'd remember how it was her family – the family she wanted to have with Bickslow, more than anything – that wasn't going to come to exist.

And Bickslow would never know about it.

After a pause as Bickslow wiped his own tears from his eyes with his sleeves, he continued quietly, and with another smile that was never going to reach his eyes, "But most of all, you're going to be happy. You're going to have a great life without pain, and you're going to be happy." Because that was all Bickslow wanted for Lucy. That was all he'd ever wanted for Lucy.

"I-I'm not…" she tried to say, but it only came out as a mumbled mess. She was convinced she was never going to be truly happy again, because if the love of her life couldn't make her happy, then no one and nothing ever would.

"Yes, you are," he insisted gently. She had to be. "Lucy, I have one last thing for you to promise me. Please give me that, please." And when she nodded silently, the only sound in the room then her sniffling and the quiet sobs every now and then, he said quietly, "Promise me you'll do all of that. Promise me you'll do all of what I said."

She shook her head then. Of all the promises she'd made to Bickslow, that was one she would never be able to keep.

"Promise me you'll at least try," he said then, without even having to hear Lucy say no.

And after a long moment of just staring back at Bickslow with tears in both their eyes, she knew she had to promise that. Lucy knew she'd have to try and be happy one day. She'd have to try and have a life outside of the one she had with Bickslow, no matter how long it would take.

She had to try _for_ Bickslow, because she knew it was hurting him just as much as it was hurting her, if not more.

She could at least try. She felt like she owed that to Bickslow, especially with what she was lying about, even if he'd never know it. So finally, with a slight nod, she whispered, "I promise."

Just hearing Lucy say she'd promise to try was enough to make Bickslow smile dejectedly once again. She never went back on her promises, and it was part of the reason he'd made her promise him long ago that if he were to ever break her heart again, that she'd leave.

Of course, back then, he'd had no intentions of leaving her, but he really had no choice now. It was for her happiness, after all. A broken heart can be mended, and Bickslow knew that first hand. He'd already broken Lucy's heart, so he had to believe that her heart could be mended once again. Someone better than him would come along and help with that.

So then, as he let go of her hands again, he reached into the inside pocket of his cloak and pulled out a book; it was the same book that had had him sitting on his living room floor as a complete mess once upon a time. "I want you to have this," he said, holding the book out to her. When she took it hesitantly and looked down at the cover in confusion, Bickslow didn't give her a chance to ask before he continued, "It was my mother's favourite book, and it was one of the few things I took with me when I left after my parents died."

"Bicks… I-I… I can't…" She tried to hand the book back to him, but he just pushed it back with a shake of his head. There was no way Lucy could take that, not when it was one of the few things he had left to remind him of his parents. It suddenly made sense as to why he'd been so engrossed in the book that one time.

But it was unfair that she should have it. She didn't deserve it.

"No, please. I remember the day you came over and you pointed that book out and said it was one of your favourites, and I really wish you'd had a chance to meet my parents. They would have adored you just as much as I do, and you would have gotten along with my mum so well, because you remind me so much of her."

Just hearing Bickslow talk about his parents had the tears rolling down her cheeks again. He almost never talked about them or his family, not unless Lucy asked about them, which was rare because she knew he didn't like to talk about them. But now, he was openly talking about them, and somehow, it made Lucy proud.

It made her proud that he was talking about them, even though it hurt like hell because she'd always wished she'd been able to meet them, just like she wished Bickslow had been able to meet her own parents.

And as Lucy slowly pulled the book in to her chest, hugging it, Bickslow could feel the pain in his chest get so much worse. He'd drawn it out longer than he had to, and it was time to go. It was time to move on, so he could let Lucy move on.

Lifting a hand, he placed his palm against her cheek and brushed the tears away with his thumb again, and ignored his own that were pricking his eyes yet again. It was so damn hard, and it hurt so damn much. But reminding himself that it would all be worth it one day, he gathered the courage to say the last words he ever would to the only woman he was ever going to love.

"Lucy, I love you more than you'll ever know, and I'm never going to stop loving you," he said, choking on the words when all of it became too much. But, he had to go on. He had to press on; through the pain, tears, and heartache. "I'll love you until the day I die, and there's not going to be a single day that passes where I don't think of you and hope that you're happy and living the life you deserve, because all I've ever wanted for you is to be happy. Nothing is ever going to change that.

"But even though this is the hardest thing I'm ever going to have to do, I'll be able to smile again one day. I'll be able to smile because I got to spend a year of my life with you, and I'll always remember it as the best year of my life, and it would all be because of you.

"So, Lucy, more than anything, I hope you get the life you deserve, because if you do, it would make me happy. Even when I'm gone and probably a thousand miles away from you, you'll still be the reason for my own happiness.

"You need to remember that I'm doing this for you, Lucy. I'm giving you the push you need to go and live that life you deserve, and I need to believe that I'm doing the right thing. I need to believe that leaving is the best thing for you," he said quietly, not even trying to hold back the desperation in his voice.

"I-I'm going t-to miss y-you, B-Bicks…" she mumbled, lifting her eyes as he slowly rose to his feet. And she really would miss him. She knew it was over, and that the next few moments would be the very last they ever shared together, no matter how painful they were.

There wasn't going to be a single day where she didn't miss Bickslow. She knew that.

But, she also knew there was nothing she could do about that.

"I know you are," he murmured. And then, after a long moment of silence, he sat down on the bed beside her and pulled her into his arms. He needed to feel her in his arms one last time. "I love you, Lucy," he whispered before pressing a long kiss to her forehead.

She choked on another sob as she turned her head into his chest. "I-I love you too, Bickslow," she murmured.

And then, when he pulled away and stood after a while, Lucy had to stop herself from trying to cling to him. She couldn't do that, because it was over. Somewhere inside of her, she knew she should stop fighting it and stop making it more painful than it already was for either of them.

There wasn't any scenario that existed where Bickslow left her apartment and they hadn't broken up. It just wasn't going to happen.

So with a final sad smile as he cupped her face with a hand again, he said softly, "I hope you have a great life, Lucy." And then, just like that, he was turning and heading for the door without so much as a glance over his shoulder. He couldn't do that. He couldn't bear to look at her anymore, just because it hurt too much.

And so as Bickslow and his team slowly headed down Strawberry Street and to wherever their adventures took them, Lucy once again curled up on her bed and stared out at the now setting sun through her window.

In such a short amount of time, she'd had almost everything taken from her.

The guild, Aquarius, her team, her friends, her baby, and now Bickslow.

And for the first time in a very long while, Lucy truly felt alone.

* * *

 **Firstly, if I offended/upset anyone by this chapter (TW...), then I apologise, profusely.**  
 **Secondly, it is currently 4AM, and I can guarantee there's going to a fuck load of errors I missed when proof-reading this, and I cannot do it again. I will do my best to get them when I go over it when I'm not running on caffeine (whose bright idea was it to have coffee at 11PM after seeing a movie?! Oh, right... this girl's...).**  
 **Thirdly, this ended up being a lot darker than I anticipated... so there's that...**

 **But seriously, you guys, I cried when writing this. There were legitimate tears in my eyes.  
But despite that, I still hope you enjoyed it. I'm so so so excited for the next chapters and the next part of this story to begin. **

**Also, I want to say thank you for the reviews on the last chapter! Phew, you guys are making me feel better about my writing, especially when I try something new.**

 **Snibs13 -** _I'm sorry. I gave you heartache (I hope? Kinda? I mean, it's a pretty shitty thing to hope, but that was the overall plan for this chapter)._

 **And with that, I think it's time for me to go and get some sleep before I get woken up by the birds from hell (like, really, birds that live outside in an aviary are goddamn evil... especially when they decide to chirp at 6AM every fucking morning).**

 **Please remember to review!**

 **\- April**


	40. Chapter 40

It took Lucy until the end of September before she was able to do what she needed to be done; before she was able to do what Bickslow had told her to do.

For weeks, she laid in her bed and moped around her apartment, and every single day, she thought about those she'd lost. She thought about the ones she loved and how they were gone, and for a while, she really did hate them.

She hated everyone for leaving; she hated everyone for doing the one thing she knew she had to do, but couldn't bring herself to do. She didn't think it was fair. How could everyone just get up and leave? How could everyone just leave their lives behind and move on? How could they forget about everything; how could they forget about her?

But, after a while where all of her thoughts had become dark and twisted, Lucy remembered that everyone really was just doing what she couldn't do. She really did know that she had to leave Magnolia, but it was hard. Magnolia was her home, and it always would be her home. It was where she had almost all of her best memories, but, it was also where some of the most painful came from.

Magnolia: the home of Fairy Tail. It was the home of her crazy, dysfunctional, psychotic, destructive, downright fucked up, but overall loving and supporting family. It served as a family to those who didn't have one, and that's what it had become to Lucy. Fairy Tail would always be her family, whether the guild existed or not.

It was where she'd met her best friends, the same ones that would always be her best friends and were part of the reason she'd smiled every day. It was where she'd met everyone that meant the most to her, and would always be special to her.

It was where she'd met Bickslow. She'd met Bickslow in Magnolia, and even though it had been a pretty terrible day as a whole, without the events that occurred, maybe the last year wouldn't have happened. It was where she'd met the love of her life; the only man she ever would or could love, and it was where she'd lived the best year of her life.

Because it was with Bickslow.

And to that day, her relationship with Bickslow was still something she'd never expected, but she didn't hate a single moment of it, and she never would. She was so glad that everything that had happened had actually happened, including the ones that were painful.

But, no matter how many good memories she had of Magnolia, there were always going to be the bad ones, and it was the bad ones she needed to forget.

She needed to forget that it was where the guild had once been, and now it only served as a painful reminder as to what once existed, but now never would again. She needed to forget that it was where she'd lost Aquarius, and the most painful of all, she needed to try and forget that it was where she'd lost her baby.

Because with each day that passed, Lucy thought about it. She couldn't help but think about it, because it still hurt. She'd lost something – _someone_ – that was going to become the centre of her world, right there next to Bickslow. She felt as if something was missing in her life, now that she truly felt alone, and she knew exactly what it was.

It was what she'd had taken; it was what she no longer had, and it was both Bickslow and the baby she'd lost.

She really had wanted to hate Bickslow for leaving her, especially when she needed him. She would always need him, no matter where he was, because there was never going to be a day where she didn't love Bickslow. And that was something she'd resigned to, eventually. She'd resigned to the fact that she really was going to love and miss Bickslow every single day for the rest of her life, and more than anything, she hoped that the ache in her heart would get better with time.

Because after all, wasn't there a saying that says time heals all wounds?

Lucy had to believe that with time, her heart that had been completely shattered – and not just entirely by Bickslow – would eventually be whole again. Or, as close to whole as it was going to get.

She had to believe that things would get better and that one day, she'd be happy again. She promised she'd at least try and be happy and move on, and she was going to do her best to make good on that promise, because Lucy didn't want her last promise to Bickslow to be one she couldn't fulfil.

So eventually, it really did become time to leave. She had to move on, and she had to try and live the life that Bickslow wanted for her, because somewhere deep down, she knew that what Bickslow had done really was for her. She hadn't understood it at the time, but as the weeks went on and she remained alone, she saw just why Bickslow had left. He'd left because he knew before Lucy did that he was all that was keeping her in Magnolia, and he felt like he was stopping her from being happy. Because as long as she was there, she wasn't going to be able to move on.

Lucy could see that Bickslow had sacrificed his own happiness, just for hers. No, the _possibility_ of hers.

And one day, when she was somewhat happy again, she was going to be thankful for that. She was going to be thankful that Bickslow had done something that she would not have been able to do on her own.

And once Lucy had come to realise just what Bickslow had done and why he'd done it, she had been ready to leave, so she started packing up all of her things, and got ready to leave. She started saying her goodbyes to those who still remained, and she was a little glad that there weren't that many people left.

Soon, she was just about ready to go off on her own adventure, but she still had two more goodbyes, so late on the afternoon she was finally leaving, Lucy found herself knocking on the door to Laxus and Mira's house. As soon as the heavy door had opened, Lucy had been pulled into Mira's arms, and Lucy tried her hardest not to cry. There'd been a reason she'd left Laxus and Mira until the very last, and that was because just after Lucy had started packing up her things and began saying her goodbyes, the eldest Strauss had announced her own pregnancy, and it really stung.

She was so happy for her friends, but it hurt, and she was determined to keep just how much it hurt her from her friends. She didn't want Mira – or Laxus – to feel any guilt over something she knew deep down that she couldn't have controlled. No one should have to feel guilty, nor should they feel sorry for Lucy. No should have to experience her pain.

No one except for Lucy.

So when Mira finally pulled away, with the assistance of Laxus, Lucy smiled and looked to the bawling mage. "I promise I'll write once I get a new place, okay?" she said, blinking away the tears that pricked her eyes.

"A-and promise y-you'll come and visit o-one day," Mira stuttered, wiping her hands across her face to brush away the tears. "P-promise y-you'll come and s-see the baby once it's born, okay?"

And even though it was another promise that she didn't want to make, Lucy knew she had to. They were her friends, and if she couldn't make that promise, then they'd know something was wrong. She couldn't let them believe that, under any circumstances. So even though it was going to hurt her, she had to smile again with a slight nod and whisper, "I promise." But it was another promise that she didn't know when she'd able to make good on, because she didn't know when she'd be happy enough to come back.

She didn't know if and when she'd be able to feel nothing but happiness for her friends and family, and not jealousy, sadness, and pain. Because right then, that's all she felt.

So when Lucy finally turned away with a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes that were brimming with tears, and the door finally closed, Laxus could only stare at the wood of it for so long as he held his crying mate against him. Mira didn't know that what she'd said had hit a nerve, and granted, Lucy had been doing a damn fine job of hiding it, but Laxus knew. Laxus knew what had happened.

"Mira, I've gotta go talk to her for a minute, okay?" Laxus said softly, pulling away as his hands held her arms just below her shoulders. When she nodded, he quickly pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head and then quickly turned for the door.

Laxus looked around the near empty street, looking both ways as he tried to find the blonde that had just left. When he saw her slowly walking away and into the quickly setting sun, he quickly turned and headed in that direction, and his long legs made it incredibly easy, and soon, he was walking just beside her with his hands shoved in his pockets.

"Lucy," he said quietly, his hand suddenly catching her elbow as she looked up in shock, before he turned and led them down a quieter street. "Walk with me. I've gotta talk to you."

And Lucy obliged with a single nod, increasing her pace when she struggled to keep up with Laxus' own broad steps. Before long, they'd reached an empty park not too far from his house, and were sitting on a bench in silence.

"How are you holding up?" he asked suddenly, turning his head to look down at the blonde who was trying so hard to appear like she was okay. But Laxus knew she wasn't; he knew she was far from it, and he was worried.

Laxus had come to care for Lucy a lot in the last year, and just like Freed and Evergreen had, he'd accepted her as part of his weird little family that was growing more and more every single day. Once upon a time, it had just been the four of them: himself, Bickslow, Freed, and Evergreen. They were their own little family that were there for each other through everything. But over time, their family expanded. Evergreen soon had Elfman, Laxus had Mira, and then Bickslow had Lucy. For the first time, they'd let other people into their lives, and just like their family had grown, they as people had grown, too.

They'd become better people as they let others into their lives, and there wasn't a day that went by where any of them ever regretted the decisions they'd made to get them to that point, because without those new people that were so important to them, they wouldn't have been half as happy as they were.

And more than anything, Laxus was proud of Bickslow. He was proud of the man Bickslow had become, and Laxus had known the moron for so long that he was like a brother. He was his best friend, and although he wouldn't admit it to anyone, he loved seeing just how much Bickslow had changed once Lucy had become a part of his life. Laxus had watched Bickslow become the person that he'd truly wanted to be, and it had all been because of Lucy.

No one would ever understand just how much Lucy meant to Bickslow, nor how much Bickslow meant to Lucy, and no one was going to try and understand it either. All they needed to know was that the two cared for each other and that without a doubt, they always would. They were supposed to spend the rest of their lives together, and they were supposed to be happy.

Because to everyone else in the guild, no matter how weird Bickslow and Lucy's relationship had seemed at first, they really were absolutely perfect for each other.

And it was precisely why it had come as a shock to everyone when they'd heard the Raijinshuu had left, and that Bickslow had left Lucy behind. No one outside of the Raijinshuu and Laxus knew exactly why Bickslow and Lucy had broken up so suddenly, but Laxus had seen Bickslow straight after he'd had to do it. He'd seen just how much it had destroyed him to do it, and it was the first time in years he'd ever sat in a room with the Seith mage and he hadn't said a single word for a long time.

The decision to leave Lucy was one that Laxus knew had been one he hadn't taken lightly, and he really did know that if it Bickslow had had any other choice, he wouldn't have left. The man had made himself completely miserable just because he believed that it would make Lucy happy, and it was because he loved her.

"I've been better, that's for sure," Lucy mumbled with a small shrug, looking down to her hands in her lap. "I just… I just miss him so much, and I wish that things hadn't ended this way."

"I know you do, and you know that Bicks didn't want things to end up like this either," he replied. When he saw the first tear roll down her cheek, Laxus really, really wanted to go and find the son of a bitch and bring him back just so he could get Lucy to stop crying. But Laxus knew it would be a waste of time, and if anything, it would just make things worse, because Bickslow couldn't make Lucy happy anymore, not by being there, anyway.

He'd broken his own heart to get her to leave, and even though it was going to hurt Laxus to see someone he'd grown close to in the last year leave, he had to make sure she did. Because just before Bickslow and the rest of the Raijinshuu had finally left, he'd made Laxus promise that no matter what happened, he'd make sure that Lucy left Magnolia and never returned, because even though Bickslow was off on his grand adventure, he was still going to try and make her life as easy as it could possibly get, after everything that had happened. Bickslow knew that if she returned to Magnolia one day, then all of the pain and loss she'd suffered would come right back, and Bickslow never wanted that for her.

So Laxus would help. He knew enough about the situation to know that Lucy was going to be happier if she didn't return. So, after another long moment, Laxus looked back down to Lucy, and quietly, he said, "You know you can't come back to Magnolia after you leave, right?"

Lucy shook her head. It didn't matter if it was going to be painful, the fact remained that she'd promised. One day, she would come back, for her friends. "I promised I would. I promised Mira-"

"Lucy," he interrupted, his voice serious now. "I know what happened, and I know that it's going to be too hard to come back. I know that visiting Mira again one day will be too painful." And he really did know.

Laxus knew exactly what had happened to Lucy, and it was exactly why he was going to make sure Lucy didn't come back to Magnolia. He'd known about the baby, because Wendy had told him, and Gajeel, of course, but only because the two of them had quite literally had to stop the younger Dragon Slayer from going after Bickslow, surprisingly.

She'd come to ask Laxus where the Raijinshuu had disappeared to one day, just after they'd left, and as soon as she'd found that that they'd left town, and that Bickslow had left Lucy, Wendy had completely changed. She'd screamed and cried on the floor for a while, mostly about how she didn't understand why Bickslow could do that to Lucy, and how Lucy needed him. You can't leave someone after something like that happens.

And when Wendy had suddenly jumped up, shouting about how she needed to go and find Bickslow to find out just why Bickslow had left when he needed to be there for Lucy, instead of abandoning her and leaving her to deal with it all on her own, Laxus and Gajeel suddenly realised there had been something else going on. There was no way that the usually oh so strong girl would be in such a state over the unexpected break up. She knew something that no one else did.

So Laxus and Gajeel did their best to calm the young Dragon Slayer down, just so they could figure out what was going on. And, of course, it hadn't taken much to get it out of Wendy once they'd sat her down, and as soon as she'd blurted out what had happened with Lucy, Laxus and Gajeel found themselves wanting to go and get their stupid friend and beat some sense into him.

But Laxus couldn't do that, no matter how much he wanted to. He couldn't do that because it would be pointless, because if Bickslow had known Lucy had been pregnant and lost the baby, then he wouldn't have left. If he'd known, he would have stayed and grieved with Lucy, like Laxus and Gajeel had assumed she'd been doing for a long while; like she still was.

"I… I don't know what you're talking about…" she mumbled, looking away suddenly.

"I know you lost the baby, and I'm guessing Bicks didn't know about any of it."

Lucy looked back suddenly, her eyes wide with shock and full of pain that she couldn't try and hide anymore. "How do you know about that?" she asked incredulously. Although she was panicked and worried about her secret getting out, she couldn't help but feel like part of that burden and the weight had been lifted off her shoulders, even if it was just a tiny bit.

Laxus shrugged. "Wendy got really upset when she heard Bicks had left. She didn't really mean to tell us, but we kind of had to stop her from going after the guy. She's young, but she's feisty," he said, the corner of his mouth lifting up into a small smirk.

"So… who else knows?"

"Just me and Gajeel," he said softly. And then, after she nodded and looked back down to her hands with a frown, Laxus stood and held out his hand to her before pulling her to her feet gently. "Look, Lucy, you've gotta go. You've gotta leave this town and go live the life that he wants you to have."

"I know I do," she whispered, looking up into the unusually soft grey eyes.

"And you're not gonna come back, at least not until you're happy with the life you've created and you're sure that it's not going to hurt you to come back."

"I'm not going to come back," she repeated. She wouldn't come back to Magnolia, not for a long while, anyway. One day, though… one day, she hoped she'd be able to, because she'd want to be able to see the place she'd once called home, and what it had become.

Laxus flashed a small smile before he pulled her into a hug and rested his chin on the top of her head. "Damn straight, you're not," he said, and when the faintest of laughs resonated from the blonde, he smiled again.

Never had Lucy ever expected Laxus of all people to become someone who she saw as an almost older brother. They'd grown so close in the last year – in the last few months especially, just like she had with Evergreen and Freed. She'd been accepted into Bickslow's family with open arms, and in turn, she'd begun to see them as her own family.

And just like she'd always love Bickslow, she'd always love the rest of his team, just because they'd also become her family. Even though she'd probably never see any of them again, she'd always remember them, and no matter where they were in the world and what they were doing, Lucy would always be hoping they, too, were living lives full of joy and happiness.

Especially Bickslow, though. Bickslow wanted her life to be full of happiness once again, and that's exactly what Lucy wanted for him.

And as Lucy finally pulled away from Laxus, wiping under her eyes with a sad smile, she looked back up to him, and quietly, she said, "Take care, Sparky."

But it was enough to have him smirk and roll his eyes, and as they both slowly turned and got ready to head in their separate directions, he called over his shoulder, "You too, Blondie." Not only did Lucy see Laxus as her sort of brother, but Laxus saw her as an adopted sister, and without a doubt, he was going to miss her, just like everyone was.

But she needed to move on. She needed to move on for herself, and for Bickslow.

So as Laxus headed home to console Mira, no doubt, Lucy slowly made her way towards Magnolia station. She looked at everything on her way there; every street name, every light post, every shrub, every bridge, every single building. She wanted to remember it all, because it was going to be the last time she saw any of it… for a while, anyway.

Lucy knew that by the time she made it back to Magnolia, everything would have changed again, and while she was away, she just wanted to remember the way it had been then. Her home would live on in her memories, and for a long while, all she'd have is her memories.

But then, she reached the station, and she knew that it was time. It was finally time to leave everything and everyone else behind, and go make a start on the life that Bickslow wanted her to have. She had to make the most of what Bickslow had given her, because after what he'd sacrificed, she owed him that.

And with a final look around the station, a sad smile crossed her lips, and then, she turned her back and boarded the train. She didn't even know where that train was taking her, but it didn't matter where, because as long as she got out of Magnolia, it would be a start.

She was finally taking that step into the beginning of the next chapter of her life, and even though, more than anything, she'd wanted that chapter to be with Bickslow, she knew that just wasn't going to happen.

As the train finally began to pull away from the station, Lucy reached into her bag on the seat beside her and pulled out a book. It was the same book that Bickslow had given her before he left, and it was going to the book she'd cherish the most for the rest of her life.

And as Lucy finally tore her gaze away from the town that got further and further away through the window, she looked down to the book, and with a sigh, she opened it carefully and looked down to the words written on the first page in the same familiar scrawl.

 _ **I want you to get a happy ending like all the best stories have; I want you to get the happy ending you deserve.**_

 _ **I'll always love you, Lucy. Remember that.**_

 _ **Remember that I did all of this so you could have a chance at getting that happy ending.**_

 _ **-Bickslow**_

As the tears slowly fell and stained the pages, Lucy couldn't help but wonder as to whether or not she was really going to get her own happy ending in life. She knew she wasn't going to get the one she wanted, but she wasn't sure if she would get one at all. Even though she wanted to be happy again, one day, there was a nagging feeling inside of her that was telling her she wasn't going to get that. Not without Bickslow, anyway.

So maybe… maybe Lucy's story wasn't going to have the happy ending that both she and Bickslow wanted for her.

Maybe she wasn't going to get a happy ending like all the best stories had, because truly, Lucy didn't know. All she knew at that point was that she'd have to wait and see where her story led her.

After all, she was only at the beginning of the next chapter. Anything could happen between now and the end.

* * *

 **I'm sorry for making you guys cry with the last chapter! I really am... but, at the same time I'm not, because that was exactly the kind of reaction I wanted. :( It still hurts though.**

 **Thank you all for the reviews though!**  
 **Sunkeepsmiling -** _your review actually influenced a big part of this chapter, so thank you._

 **I'm sad that you guys hate me for the last chapter... but... it needed to be done. I'd been planning that since the very beginning, and it took 39 chapters for it to finally happen, but, it happened nonetheless. Now, I know this chapter is shorter, but it was necessary. It couldn't go in the next chapter, and essentially, it acts as a kind of prologue for the second part, if you may. (Even though it's all really just one giant part, but I mean, come on, major conflict... kinda splits the story in half).**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this one anyway, and as usual, I look forward to your reviews! (So please leave them... hehe).**

 **Time to go work on something a little less depressing...**

 **\- April**


	41. Chapter 41

**A/Ns at the bottom of the chapter!**

* * *

October always brought a slight chill to Fiore as they reached the middle of Autumn and Winter slowly got closer. It was that same chill that kept Bickslow awake and feeling somewhat refreshed that night; the crispness in the air and the almost deafening silence was all that surrounded him.

He quietly walked across the ground, trying to make the snap of the twigs beneath his feet as quiet as possible with each gentle step. Bickslow had no idea what time it was, but he knew it was late. Evergreen and Freed had been asleep as he'd silently crept away from their camp for that night as they travelled between towns. Most nights they spent camped out in the woods somewhere, just enjoying each other's company as best they could, instead of spending their nights in some fancy hotel room. But Bickslow liked that; he liked just spending time with his team, staring down at the crackling fire until it was nothing but a small flicker upon the embers. It felt like the old times, and even if it would just be for the briefest of moments, he felt something close to happiness.

But it was just that: the briefest of moments.

Bickslow wasn't happy at all. He was miserable, and he felt sorry for his team that they had to put up with him, but he hadn't expected to be happy when he'd left Magnolia, nor had his team. They'd done their best to cheer him up, to remind him that he'd done the right thing, but every day, Bickslow just wanted to go back.

He had his team, his best friends, yet he was lonely. He'd never felt so lonely in his entire life. Something was missing in his life, and it wasn't really a something, because it was a someone.

It was Lucy.

And Bickslow knew he was always going to feel that way; he was always going to have that hole in his heart that only Lucy could fill, and he was always going to miss her. He was always going to miss her and it because he was never going to stop loving her, even when he didn't know where she was or what she was doing with her life.

No matter what, he would always love her, and nothing was going to change that.

No matter what, he was always going to be in pain, but he had to live with that. He'd been the one that decided to leave – not Lucy, not anyone else. Him. He'd brought that pain upon his self, and there wasn't a thing anyone could do about it.

But he didn't want anyone to do anything about it, either. He wanted to live with that pain, and he would. He would embrace how much it hurt, just because he knew that what he felt would all be worth it one day.

One day, Lucy was going to be able to smile again. One day, Lucy was going to go and live the life she wanted and deserved. One day, Lucy was going to get the family she deserved.

One day, Lucy was going to be happy.

And it had always come down to that one dream of 'one day.' Ever since the beginning, it had been about the premise of 'one day.'

One day, Bickslow was going to fall in love with her.

And he had. He'd fallen completely, hopelessly, irrevocably, whatever fucking word you wanted to use next in love with her, and he was always going to be in love with her.

One day, Bickslow was going to ask her to spend the rest of her life with him.

But that one… that one he hadn't done. He couldn't have done it, because he'd known he'd have to leave.

For Lucy.

It had always been about Lucy. Everything he'd ever done had been for Lucy and to make sure she was happy. It was that alone that made Bickslow want to deal with the pain forever, because one day, Lucy would be happy somewhere, and as long as Lucy was happy, Bickslow could be somewhat close to happy.

He hoped.

He hoped that Lucy's happiness, no matter where she was at the time, would be enough for himself to be happy once again, because ever since leaving, he couldn't help but think that it wouldn't be enough.

He wanted to believe that her being happy would be enough, but somewhere deep down, he knew it wasn't. Bickslow would need Lucy in his life to be truly happy, so maybe, without that, he wouldn't be happy.

Eh, it wasn't like it mattered anyway. His own happiness was almost irrelevant, because even then, it was still about Lucy. It would always be about Lucy.

Everything he'd done – all the pain he was willing to put himself through for the rest of his life – was for Lucy.

So as he sat down on a fallen tree by the edge of a large pond not too far from their camp, he sighed and tried to pull his cloak in tighter around himself. Usually, Bickslow had never been one to feel the cold – nor the heat – but as the end of the year grew nearer, he began the feel the cold even more. The chill in the air – he felt it in his bones.

Hell, he felt it in his very soul.

And he knew exactly why; it was because he felt empty. Without Lucy, he was empty. His life was almost meaningless, dull, void of everything.

Void of everything but pain and hurt from something he'd done.

But again, he was always constantly having to remind himself that he'd done the right thing. Because one day, Lucy was going to be happy, and hurting himself, and Lucy, would be worth it. Well, as worth as it's going to get.

So after a while of listening to nothing but the chirping crickets and the rustle of the trees and brushes around him in the light breeze, he reached into the heavy cloak that no longer smelled of Lucy from all the times she'd worn it over the year, and pulled out a folded piece of paper.

It was a letter from Laxus, because no matter where they were, their fearless leader always had a way of sending letters and getting in contact with them.

As he slowly unfolded the paper and stared down at the dull paper in the moonlight, he reached up with one hand and unclipped his visor, letting it fall to the ground beside his feet in amongst the leaves as he pushed his hood back and ran a hand through his hair.

It was the first letter any of them received since they'd left Magnolia, and even though Bickslow had received it that morning, it was the first time he was reading it. He couldn't have brought himself to read it during the day, because he'd known it would be about Lucy. He knew reading it would make him feel even more miserable than he already was, because it would be information as to what Lucy was doing, and he couldn't do that to his team; he couldn't be even more of a mopey bastard than he already was.

At least at night, he was alone. No one had to see him at his absolute worst, because the nights really were the worst for Bickslow.

So angling the paper so he could read the nearly illegible scrawl in the moonlight, he focused his eyes on the words and began to read.

 _ **Bickslow,**_

 _ **I could probably sit here and write about what I've been doing in the last month and what's been going on in the town with everyone that remains, but I know you're not interested in that, so I'll cut to the chase.**_

 _ **Lucy finally left last week. I have no idea where she went or where she is now, but she's gone. She knows not to come back, not for a while, anyway. I made sure of that.**_

 _ **She said she's going to write once she gets settled into a new place, so assuming these goddamn pregnancy hormones don't turn the demon into actual Satan (oh yeah, we're having a baby, apparently), then I should be able to pass on small bits and pieces every now and then. I know it's probably not the wisest idea, but I also know it will help you to know that she's moving on with her life.**_

 _ **But I hope you're moving on with your own life, Bickslow. As best you can, anyway.**_

 _ **Give Ever and Freed my best.**_

 _ **Laxus**_

The corner of his mouth lifted up slightly as he read the letter again and again. Lucy finally left Magnolia, and ever since he'd left himself, he'd wondered whether she'd left or not. She needed to leave to move on with her life, and she needed to leave to do that.

But she had, so it was a start. She'd taken that first step to getting the life that Bickslow wanted for her; she'd taken the first step to getting the life she deserved.

"Still can't sleep, huh?"

Bickslow turned at the soft voice to see Evergreen gently sitting down on the log next to him, pulling her own coat tighter around herself to warm herself up. As he handed her the letter to read, he shook his head, looking down at the fallen leaves and dirt beneath his feet.

Sleeping was hard, as silly as it was. He'd barely been able to sleep as it was when he'd still been in Magnolia and Lucy had been pulling away with each day that passed. But… that had been different. Now that he was actually gone, it was near impossible to sleep. For so long, he'd fallen asleep with Lucy right beside him, and even if they weren't tangled up together and were on the opposite sides of the bed (which was more common), he still knew she was there. He'd get to wake up to her bright smile every morning she was there, and he'd always loved that. She'd always made his day instantly better, even when he'd just woken up.

But now that he was gone and alone, he just couldn't fall asleep anymore. He couldn't get comfortable, even if he had the world's best mattress or a million pillows around him. No matter how much he tried, he could even shut his brain off, because as soon as he got even remotely close to comfortable and maybe drifting off to sleep, he'd start worrying about Lucy. He would think about where she was, what she was doing in that exact moment, and whether or not she was getting better, plus a million other things. He just couldn't stop.

And it wasn't like Bickslow wanted to fall asleep, either, because he didn't. He hated sleeping, as much as he needed it, because when he did fall asleep, he dreamt of Lucy and the life that _he_ wanted; the dreamt of the life with Lucy that he'd given up. _For_ Lucy.

All he saw when he did manage to fall asleep from sheer exhaustion alone was the life he wasn't going to get; the wedding, the kids, _her_. None of it. It was all gone.

But Bickslow still hoped that Lucy would get all of that. One day, she'd get all of that with someone else. One day, someone would come along and they'd care about Lucy as much as he did, and she'd get the perfect life that she deserved.

The perfect life that Bickslow couldn't have given her.

"So Laxus and Mira are having a baby?" Evergreen asked quietly as she handed the letter back to Bickslow and he tucked it into a pocket on the inside of his cloak again.

He nodded. "Apparently," he mumbled. "Can you imagine Laxus as a dad?"

"I'm having a hard time doing so, but… I think he'll be a good dad," she said quietly.

"Yeah, so do I." And Bickslow did think that. Laxus had always had a heart under all of that muscle and hidden behind that scowl. Always. Though he never showed it, he'd always cared, and Bickslow knew that it was why Laxus would make a great father. He'd make a great father because of what his own had done to him.

And even though the guild would have been long gone by the time Laxus and Mira's baby was born, they would still grow up as being a member of Fairy Tail, because even when the building was gone, the guild lived on within them. That's just what it meant to be in Fairy Tail.

They were a family, and you never lose your family, no matter where they are.

But then, after a while of just listening to the rustling of the leaves in the breeze and the occasionally disturbance of the pond in front of them, Bickslow said quietly, "You should go back to sleep. It's late."

And Evergreen could only nod. She knew Bickslow had come to enjoy his solitude during the night, if you could even say that it was enjoyable for him. Really, it was probably just more of a preference over sleeping, and she couldn't blame him for that. Herself and Freed both knew he was having a hard time – an incredibly hard time – but they also knew that there wasn't much they could do to cheer him up. They could remind him that he'd done the right thing, and that it was all going to be worth it one day, but they could see it wasn't really helping. Even if one day Lucy really was happy, they didn't think Bickslow would be. They didn't think Lucy's happiness would be enough for Bickslow, even though he still hoped it would be.

No matter what, whether Lucy was happy or not, Bickslow was still going to be miserable. It might get better with time, or it might not. Nobody knew what would happen.

So as she slowly turned and headed for the camp where Freed was still sleeping and the fire was just a small pile of embers, she looked over her shoulder, and quietly, she said, "She'll be happy again, Bicks." _Whether it's because of you or someone else… she'll be happy_ , she thought, because without a doubt, everyone knew that if they could be with each other again, then they'd both be happy.

"Yeah, one day," he whispered.

And when Bickslow could no longer hear Evergreen's footsteps over the rustling of the leaves and bushes around him, he twisted on the log and laid back to look up at the stars, with his arms folded behind his head and his feet flat on the ground on either side of it.

 _One day, she'll be happy._

 _One day…_

* * *

Lucy sat down at her desk with a sigh as she reached out to switch on the lamp that sat in the corner, illuminating the surface just enough to see what she was doing. Looking up to the window just next to her desk, her lips pulled up into a small smile at the slowly falling snowflakes just outside.

Christmas was just a week away, and even though she wanted to be glad about the thought of having a white Christmas – something she hadn't seen in the time she'd been in Magnolia – she wasn't. In truth, she wasn't excited about Christmas in the slightest, because even though she'd only shared one Christmas with Bickslow, it was the first one where she wouldn't be with him, and she'd never once expected to spend another holiday season without him.

But Christmas was special. The 25th was the date they'd been out on their first date, and in December, that date marked the first time Bickslow had ever told her that he loved her, and he'd told her a million-and-one times since that day.

Lucy just couldn't look forward to Christmas, because she just had nothing to look forward to. She told herself that the next year would be better, that she'd go into the new year with a positive outlook on life and try her hardest to move on from what she no longer had, because even though it had been months since Bickslow had left and everything had happened, Lucy was still in pain. It had gotten easier, but only barely.

So with another sigh, Lucy finally tore her gaze away from the window and looked back down to her desk where a blank piece of paper sat. She'd promised Mira she'd write once she'd settled in to a new place, and she'd been in her new house in Crocus since the beginning of December. She had a somewhat decent job, and she had a new house that wasn't quite a home, not that she would ever expect it to be a home.

But she was settled enough to write to one of her closest friends. Besides, she'd promised, and Lucy never went back on her promises. Reaching for a pen from the drawer, she finally began to move her hand delicately across the paper and write the words she'd been struggling to find all day.

 _ **Mira,**_

 _ **I know it's been a few months, but I only recently got settled in and couldn't find the time to sit down and write to you.**_

 _ **I found myself in Crocus not too long ago (can you believe it?), and ended up running in to Jason from Sorcerer Magazine, and he offered me a job. Granted, it's not the kind of job I'd ever pictured having if I managed to work for them, but it's a start, I suppose. One day, though, I'll have an article published. For now, well… you'll just have to wait until the next issue… hopefully it's not too bad, though.**_

 _ **I hope the weather is a little warmer in Magnolia than it currently is here. It's been snowing all week, so it looks as if we're in for a white Christmas this year. As much as I love the snow, I think I'd always choose Magnolia's Christmas over Crocus'. I guess I'll just have to get used to it though.**_

 _ **How are you and Laxus doing? I hope he's still taking care of you. And the baby, I guess.**_

Lucy dropped the pen to raise both of her hands to her eyes then to try and dry them. That was still a painful subject for her, but she knew she had to be at least a little supportive of her friends and their growing family. It would appear just a little bit odd to Mira if she didn't bring it up in her letter. Laxus would understand, but Mira wouldn't.

It had only taken her a few weeks after leaving to make Lucy realise that she wished she'd actually told people about her baby, and more importantly, she wished she'd told Bickslow. She knew that he really did deserve to know, and it was unfair that she'd kept it from him. After all, it hadn't just been her baby, but it had been his, too; it had been _their_ baby. Even though all she'd wanted to do at the time was keep Bickslow from knowing the pain that she'd felt – and still did, for that matter – she knew that it had been wrong of her to do so.

Maybe she'd been scared of Bickslow hating her and blaming her more than she already blamed herself and left regardless, or maybe he'd have understood why she'd been the way she had all those months ago, and maybe he'd have ended up staying; maybe she wouldn't be spending her Christmas alone.

But none of that really mattered anymore. What's done is done; Bickslow was gone, and she was gone. Everything and everyone was gone, and she was still trying to get over that. She had to build her new life, and somehow manage to do so without the one person she loved most in the entire world. It was going to be a struggle, but she'd find a way. Eventually.

She'd promised Bickslow that she'd do that, and Lucy never broke her promises. Ever.

But there was one promise she'd never made to anyone but herself. Lucy had promised herself that if she ever saw Bickslow again – whether it be in two weeks, months, years, or even decades – then she would tell him what happened. She'd tell him about the family that they were going to have, and she'd hope that telling someone would actually make everything just a little bit more bearable.

Maybe she'd tell Mira one day, and maybe she'd tell her best friends. Who knows, really.

Maybe telling people would just make it that little bit easier.

So with a shaky breath, Lucy picked up the pen once again after she'd calmed herself down, and went back to writing her letter.

 _ **I know I said I'd come and visit one day after the baby is born, but I'm not sure if I'll be able to. Right now, I just need to stay away from Magnolia. I know I never told you this before I left, but there's just too many bad memories there at the moment. One day I'll be able to come back. Maybe it will be when I'm a best-selling author and I'm on a book tour (oh, how I wish), or maybe it will be when Crocus just makes me miss my home too much and I can no longer stay.**_

 _ **I just don't know.**_

 _ **I want to come and visit one day though, I really do. It just won't be for a while, and I hope you understand, Mira.**_

 _ **Laxus, I know you're reading this, too, and you're probably scowling at it as you read it, but that's okay. I'll be okay to come back one day, when everything is easier and I can face the bad memories again. I just hope you won't be too mad to see this blonde walk the streets of Magnolia again one day.**_

 _ **I hope you all have a great Christmas and new year. Give my best to everyone.**_

 _ **I miss you all.**_

 _ **Lucy**_

And so after reading over her letter to make sure she hadn't forgotten anything or said too much, she pulled an envelope from the top drawer of her desk and folded up the letter neatly to place it in the envelope.

Lucy knew that Mira wouldn't like finding out that she wasn't able to return to Magnolia – not in the foreseeable future, anyway – but she also knew that Laxus would be able to find a way to make Mira see that it was all for the best, and that it was the right thing to do. Lucy trusted Laxus to do just that.

So after making sure she had the right address written on the envelope, she got up from her chair and trudged on over to her bed that was just behind her desk and after ridding herself of her skirt and singlet she'd worn that day, she reached for the grey and pink shirt that was sitting on the end of her bed, and she pulled it on over her head, letting the fraying hem fall to lightly brush against her thighs as she finally climbed in to bed to stare at out the snow falling just outside her window.

It was the same grey and pink shirt she'd worn almost religiously for the last year, and even though there were a few holes in the fabric and the stitching was fraying, it was still her favourite article of clothing in the entire world. It wasn't even really her shirt, even though it had become hers from the first time she'd ever slept in it, but it was really Bickslow's. It had always been Bickslow's, and it was the one thing she'd ended up taking from his apartment before she'd left.

She'd left everything else there in his apartment; her clothes in the drawers and in the wardrobe, her soaps and shampoos on the shelves in the bathroom, her favourite cereal in the kitchen cupboard. Everything that was hers was still there. She just hadn't been able to bring herself to take any of it back, because she couldn't help but think that it all belonged there.

But the shirt was the one thing she had been able to bring herself to take. If anything, she'd just wanted it as a keepsake to sit in her own drawers, but it had never been that. The shirt had been the one thing to allow her to fall asleep when Bickslow wasn't there, and it had been like that even when they'd still been together. She'd gotten so used to falling asleep next to someone that it was near impossible falling asleep alone, but after everything had happened, it had gotten even harder.

And it was still hard to fall asleep. Most nights, she didn't get that much sleep. She'd toss and turn for hours, only to finally fall asleep as soon as she had to get up to go about her day.

But as silly as it was, the shirt helped. It was the one thing that had always helped her fall asleep when she couldn't, but just like Bickslow did, it made her feel just that little bit safer.

So as she stared at the slowly falling snowflakes just outside her window, with one hand balled up in the fabric of the shirt she was wearing, she thought about what Bickslow was doing in that moment. Maybe he was staring out at the night sky just like she was, or maybe he was up and laughing with his team and enjoying himself. She hoped he was, because she hoped that he was happy.

* * *

Evergreen and Freed quickly looked up from the magazine they had between them when they heard a key being turned in the door to their hotel room, and just as Bickslow walked in, they quickly scrambled to hide the magazine under a pillow and smiled up at their friend who was already beginning to doubt their innocence.

"So," Evergreen started, bringing her legs up to fold under her on the soft mattress of her bed. "What did you end up getting?"

Bickslow unclasped the front of his cloak to let it fall from his shoulders, and then threw it to drape over his own unmade bed as he crossed the room to place the large paper bag he held in one arm on the small table by all of the beds. "Well, apparently this town has morals or something, so the only things open on Christmas are liquor stores," he said while reaching into the bag to unpack everything. "So I got booze. A lot of booze, actually, because I plan on getting so drunk that I pass out."

Evergreen and Freed shared a look of concern for their friend before they got up and walked over to the table, Freed reaching for the bottle of peach schnapps and Evergreen for the raspberry vodka that she loved way too much. "So just like old times, huh?" she said with a smile.

"Just like old times," Bickslow echoed.

And it really was just like old times. Before everything with Lucy, that's how Bickslow had spent his holiday season. Drinking with his friends – his family – and forgetting the world around them just for one night. None of them had ever particularly had a reason to celebrate anything, and even if they did, none of them had ever wanted to.

But then Lucy had come into Bickslow's life, and for the first time in a long time, he'd had a reason to celebrate Christmas. It had been the first time he'd told her that he'd loved her, and he'd always remember that day. He'd remember how it was the first time he'd realised that he didn't want to spend another day where she wasn't in his life, because even back then, after only four months of dating, Bickslow had known that he was never going to love anyone like he loved Lucy.

Because Lucy was something else – she was someone else. She was the centre of his world, and the only thing keeping him grounded when everything just got too hard. She just _was_ his world, and Christmas had finally found a new reason to be celebrated for Bickslow, because it had become a time to be thankful that he had Lucy in his life.

But he couldn't be happy that year, not when he was gone and he'd given Lucy up. He'd willingly given up his one reason to be happy, and it still hurt like hell. But that was okay, because it was all going to be worth it one day. That's what he had to keep telling himself.

It was the fact that he wasn't happy that holiday season that was making it like the old times, because it had taken Lucy coming into his life to make Bickslow realise that he hadn't ever truly been happy. He'd always been missing something, and that something had been a someone all along; it had always been Lucy.

So as he finished unpacking all of the drinks and food he had managed to pick up, he crumpled up the bag and tossed it to the bin that wasn't too far away. Reaching for one of the crisps from the bag that Freed had opened, he quickly shoved it into his mouth and crossed the room to Evergreen's bed. In one smooth movement, he'd lounged on his back and grabbed the magazine that had been hiding under the pillow. "Now," he mumbled around the mouthful of food. "Why the hell did you decide to hide the Weekly Sorcerer when I came into the room?"

Oh, yes, he'd seen it. Though he didn't know just what it was they'd shoved under the pillow as he'd come through the door, he did now, and he didn't understand why one of the trashiest magazines in Fiore was something to hide.

"Oh… no… no reason at all," Evergreen said as she quickly went and snatched the magazine from his hands before he could even open it.

Freed nodded as he began to pour his own drink. "Nothing interesting in there anyway," he agreed. "It would be a waste of your time to read such a thing."

Bickslow arched a brow as he sat up and leant back on his hands. "Oh, come on. Freed, you know for a fact that I have nothing better to do with my time," he turned to face Evergreen who was avoiding looking at him. "And you, Ever, stop looking so suspicious. What the fuck is in it?"

"Nothing…" she muttered.

"Ever."

"Nothing you'd particularly want to see," she corrected herself.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Freed looked at Evergreen in concern, his brow furrowed slightly. "Evergreen, I know what you're thinking, and it's a bad idea."

She turned to look at her green-haired friend. "Well, you know he's not going to drop it!" she said with exasperation. "And I mean, he's bound to hear things about it eventually—"

"It's possible he will not."

"I'm right here, guys," Bickslow chimed in, rolling his eyes.

"He will," Evergreen insisted, ignoring Bickslow's comment. "It's not like their entire relationship was very low-profile after they decided to tell the entire fucking guild about it!"

"But I still don't think it would be wise to allow Bickslow to see it."

It didn't take very long for Bickslow to figure out the basis of what they were hiding in the magazine from him, especially after Evergreen's comment. She was right though, because some time just after Christmas the previous year, Jason had come bursting through the guild doors to do a piece on 'Fairy Tail's newest, hottest, and weirdest couple.' But it was just one day, and as much as both himself and Lucy had hated that they'd had to spend an entire day with the reporter who had an issue with saying a certain word, it had to be done, otherwise the guy was going to pester them and the piece on them in the magazine would end up being one that was mostly fiction. That was the last thing they wanted to happen, so they'd gone along with it and let the magazine publish a piece on them, on their own terms.

And it had all blown over once it had been published. Sure, they'd heard the odd comment from people about just how they two managed to work together, but for the most part, they'd been able to go about their life privately. Well, as private as the guild would allow.

But as soon as Evergreen had said that, Bickslow knew it had something to do with Lucy, or even him, or something along those lines, and he needed to see it. He needed to know what it was truly about.

So as his two best friends continued to argue, completely unaware that the subject of their argument was still in the room and listening to their every word, Bickslow got up from the bed with another roll of his eyes and quickly reached out to pull the magazine from where Evergreen was holding it behind her back and began to flick through the pages.

Evergreen shrieked as she turned, having been taken for surprise as the magazine had been taken from her. "Bicks, don't…"

"I have to see whatever it is," he mumbled.

Freed sighed with a small nod. "I know, Bickslow," he said quietly. Just because he was worried about his friend's feelings because of what was in the magazine, doesn't mean he didn't know that it was something Bickslow needed to see. He knew it was something he could only keep from the man for so long, because like Evergreen had said, he was bound to find out about it at some point. They were the Raijinshuu – people knew them all over Fiore, and unfortunately, people knew of Bickslow and Lucy's relationship because of a certain magazine. And, just as unfortunately, anyone who read it was now aware of their split.

When Bickslow finally found the page (or pages, as it were) he was looking for, he tilted his head to the side slightly as he peered at the glossy pages, his brow furrowing the longer he did. When he'd told Lucy to go and do something she loved and made her happy, he'd never once expected that something to be become an underwear model… for the Weekly Sorcerer, of all things.

In the centre of the two pages was the blonde, sitting on her knees in the middle of a bed with rumpled sheets, and with her arms folded behind her head. The lacy red lingerie she was in did nothing to help Bickslow miss her any less, and if anything, it just made him miss her more – because damn it, his girlfriend (or ex-girlfriend, rather) was hot as hell.

But then he focused on the white words in the bold print that sat on the far left of one of the pages and over the Christmas tree that was in the background of the image. As he read them over in his head quickly, he slowly moved backwards until the backs of his legs had hit the bed, and slowly lowered himself to sit before he read the words on the page aloud, mostly just to remind himself that it was all real.

"I know what's on my Christmas wish list this year," he mumbled quietly, reading from the short paragraph. "With boyfriend Bickslow of Fairy Tail out of the picture, the eternally beautiful, once Celestial Spirit mage of Fairy Tail, Lucy Heartfilia, is back on the market. With heart in pieces after her recent break-up, who will be the lucky one to piece it back together, and maybe spend every Christmas hereafter with her?"

"Bickslow?" Evergreen said softly as she sat down next to him on her bed, gently taking the magazine from his hands and tossing it behind her. "Are you okay?" she asked, even though she knew it was a ridiculous question, because Bickslow hadn't been okay for a single day after leaving Magnolia.

But he nodded regardless of whether he was or not – which he wasn't. Ignoring the worry-filled looks Freed and Evergreen were sending him, he got up from the bed and grabbed his cloak from his own and quickly threw it over his shoulders, fastening the clasp with one hand. "I'm good," he lied, heading straight for the table where Freed was sitting. Picking up one of the bottles, he turned and began to walk towards the glass door on one wall that led to the small private balcony. "I think I'm just going to get some air for a while or something…" he mumbled, pushing it open. "Just… enjoy yourselves, or whatever. Don't wait up for me."

And before either of this friends could question just where he was going, Bickslow had slid the door closed behind him and stepped onto his babies as the slowly lined up just in front of him. There'd been so many times in the last few months where he'd opted to be alone than with his friends, that they knew there was no point of trying to stop him. They didn't know whether being alone at times was helping with cope with it all, but they knew it wasn't getting any worse, because in truth, they didn't think it could get any worse for Bickslow.

So with a sigh, Bickslow plopped himself down on the edge of the roof to their hotel and let his legs dangle over the edge as he stared at the tops of the buildings surrounding him.

"Miss! Lucy!" the dolls chanted quietly, a hint of sadness in their usually chirpy voices as they hovered in front and around Bickslow.

"I know you do, babies," he mumbled, taking a swig from the bottle. "So do I."

And he was always going to miss her. Bickslow had accepted that fact, and after seeing the magazine and reading the short paragraph in it, he'd accepted that there was nothing he could do about any of it. Because essentially, it was all right. He'd broken her heart because he'd left her – and he'd known he was doing so – and there was eventually going to be someone else in her life that her heart would belong to. It didn't matter whether he'd still love her, because there was going to be someone else that she would fall in love with, and that person would love her back and be there for her when Bickslow wasn't.

That's what it had always been about – it was about Lucy moving on from him and finding love and happiness again. Bickslow had to accept that it was going to happen. One day.

But just because he'd accepted it, it didn't mean he liked it. In truth, he hated it.

With the bottle of what was apparently scotch in one hand, and the babies hovering around him, just as depressed as he was, he leant back on one hand to look up to the unusually dull sky. "Merry Christmas, Lucy," he muttered. "What I wouldn't give to be spending it with you."

* * *

"Happy birthday, Lucy!"

The blonde smiled at the elderly woman who lived in the apartment just next to her, and uttering a quick thanks, she continued on her way up the stairs. She was so busy those days, having finally scored a job with the magazine that actually had her writing instead of posing in lingerie (and honestly, Lucy was still incredibly mad over the Christmas edition), and with the Grand Magic Games starting in just a few days, she had even less time to do the simple things, such as greet her elderly neighbours.

Over the months, the girl had been cheering up just that little bit more. She'd been writing to Mira and Laxus every other week, as well as the occasional one to Cana or Levy. She wished she had more opportunities to write to her friends though, because she still missed them as much as she had the year before.

She still missed Bickslow more than anything in the entire world, and she wished that he was still there right beside her, but she'd come to accept that she'd probably never get to see him again. He was god knows where, doing god knows what, and Lucy preferred that, honestly. She liked not knowing where he was or what he was doing those days, because she felt that if she did know, there would be no way in hell she could stop herself from going to wherever that may be.

But just because she'd finally accepted that Bickslow was no longer part of her life, it didn't mean she liked it. She loathed it, but she had still been doing her very best to move on and start a new life. A co-worker of hers had set her up on a date on Valentine's Day, and even though she'd only really gone on dates with Bickslow before, it had been the worst one she'd ever gone on. She just wasn't interested in the whole dating thing anymore. She didn't want to find anyone just then, and thanks to that horrendous Christmas edition of the Sorcerer, every guy who came across her felt the need to ask her out, thinking that she so desperately needed a man in her life. The truth was that she didn't.

Well, she did, but none of them were Bickslow.

But she'd indulged her co-worker, and she'd indulged her Valentine's Date for the night, just because she'd had nothing better to do with her time. She'd also indulged her rather annoying need for something she'd realised she'd been missing in the months that Bickslow had been gone, but, you know, turns out only the love of her life could get her to writhe in pleasure, no matter how many times she'd tried (and her short list of partners had tried) to make her feel that same way. Hell, not even her own _hand_ could make her feel that amazing. That wasn't supposed to happen.

Regardless, though, Lucy just wasn't interested in settling down. Not any time soon, anyway. She didn't need someone to love her, and she sure as hell didn't want to love anyone else. She didn't think it would be possible until she'd fallen out of love with Bickslow, and even nearly after a year of being separated, Lucy was still very much in love with him.

But that was okay. She'd accepted that, too. He was the love of her life, and the one person and thing she loved more than anything in the entire world. It wasn't something she could just forget about overnight.

Nor could she forget about the fact she'd also lost her chance at a family with him. She'd told Levy about the baby in one of the few letters she'd sent the Solid Script mage, but no one else. She still wasn't ready to tell people about it, no matter how much she'd accepted it or moved on from it. Besides, was it really something that the entire world needed to know about? It was in the past, and as much as telling someone else about what had happened had made it easier for Lucy to get over the pain, she still didn't think that everyone needed to know. Of course, she'd tell her closest friends, should it ever really come up, but until then, she realised she was fine with keeping it mostly to herself. It was easier to deal with now that she was focusing on her work and getting to where she thought she wanted to be.

That didn't mean she'd tell Mira any time soon, though. Mira would find out eventually, but with her son being born only a week earlier, Lucy knew that the time to tell the once demon barmaid was not then. And even though she was happy for her friends, she was still a little envious of their small family.

She was envious… but Lucy had come to realise that it wasn't what she wanted at all. She didn't really want the family with the kids anymore, because she'd wanted all of that with Bickslow. She just didn't want any of that with anyone else. Of course, it didn't help that was terrified of falling pregnant again – to anyone and with anyone, for that matter – just in case it did end with the same unfortunate circumstance. Lucy didn't think she'd be able to cope with that.

But she really was okay with taking children out of her future life. As much as she'd wanted them before, they were the last thing she wanted now. She just wanted her family with Bickslow, and that was never going to happen.

So with a sigh, Lucy quickly opened and closed her apartment door, turning the lock before she went over to her dining table to drop her bag, keys, and the box she held under her arm. She could see it was from Magnolia, and that it was from Laxus and Mira. She'd specifically asked for no birthday presents, but of course, one of them hadn't listened. _Probably Mira_ , she noted.

She tucked her long hair behind her ears before she went over to her kitchen to pull a knife from one of the drawers, and returning back to the table, she carefully ran the tip of the blade along the tape that held the box sealed. Once it was cut along the length of the top, Lucy gently placed the knife down on the table and pried the flaps at the top of the box apart, only to find a small chest within the box, surrounded by hay to keep it from getting damaged. Opening the box up further, she lifted the small chest out and placed it on the table, and she carefully took the folded up letter that had been stuck to the top of it.

 _ **It's not from us.**_

 _ **Happy birthday, Lucy. Hope you have a great day.**_

 _ **Laxus, Mira, and Jax**_

Lucy's brow became furrowed as she looked down to the small black chest in front of her. "Huh?" she muttered, gently placing the letter from Laxus and Mira on the table before she reached out to open the chest in front of her. She didn't understand who it could be from, yet have been sent to her through Laxus and Mira.

Opening the chest, she found yet another box – a box the size of a ring box, nonetheless – and another letter, and when she saw her name written on the front of the folded piece of card in the messy scrawl she hadn't seen in so long, she felt her heart begin to race and the tears sting her eyes.

She couldn't stand, her legs were shaking as much as her hands, and as she picked up the card from the chest, leaving just the smaller box in it, she fell down to sit in one of the chairs at the table. Without even reading it or seeing what was in the box, she knew it was from Bickslow. She knew that handwriting anywhere, and even though the first thought that had run through her mind was one where she questioned how he could do such a thing – send her something when he was so far away – because it was just so unfair.

But that thought was quickly lost, because more importantly, she was glad. Not knowing where he was, when she'd been tracking everyone else just to see what they were up to, was something that had made her worry so much. His entire team had almost gone off the radar completely, and even when she did hear bits and pieces about them on jobs over the months, she'd never know where they are.

Just because he wasn't there, doesn't mean she didn't constantly worry about whether he was hurt or okay.

So with a shaky breath, Lucy carefully unfolded the note and began to read it silently, not even caring that it was getting hard to see through the tears that were slowly beginning to fall.

 _ **Happy birthday, Lucy.**_

 _ **I know it's been so long, and I know I shouldn't have even sent this in the first place, but I couldn't help myself. Ever and Freed are probably going to kill me once they found out what I did, and Laxus too once he decides to snoop (and yes, Spark plug, I know you're reading this, too, even though I specifically asked you not to).**_

 _ **I've been carrying that thing around for nearly a year, and each time I see it, I just feel worse than I already do. It was bought for you, so you might as have it. Keep it, sell it, throw it away; it doesn't matter what you do with it, because it's yours and it was always going to be yours.**_

 _ **I miss you more than I can even put in to words, and even now, I still love you as much as I did a year ago. Probably shouldn't be saying that, but oh well. It's the last time you'll ever hear from me, so hopefully just knowing that will help you move forward just a little bit more.**_

 _ **I still hope you're aiming to get that life you deserve, and more than anything, I hope you're happier than you were the last time I was with you.**_

 _ **Enjoy that life of yours, Lucy.**_

 _ **Bickslow**_

The letter slipped from her hands and floated gracefully down to the floor by her feet, and instead of curling up in a ball on her bed right away with her favourite shirt on, she pulled the small black velvet box from the chest, and when she opened it and saw the sparkling diamond ring, she choked on her sobs.

Before everything had happened, he'd wanted to propose. And Lucy had always known that he was going to propose, but it had just been a matter of waiting for that day. She'd been looking forward to it in the few months leading up to their one-year anniversary, because she hoped that he'd do it then, but then everything had changed, and she hadn't been looking forward to anything.

Even though Lucy knew she should have been absolutely livid with Bickslow for sending her such a thing, on her birthday, nonetheless, she wasn't. It didn't matter that it was just a reminder of what could have been, because even when he was a hundred miles away, or maybe even just one mile away, she still would have said yes to marrying him if he'd asked. Without a single moment of hesitation, that's what she would have done.

But it really was just a reminder of what could have been. Still, though, she didn't think she had the capacity to just throw it away. Leaving the letter on the ground and the chest on the table, with one hand, she wiped her eyes to try and clear her vision, and with the other, she took the ring with the twisting bands out of the box. Lucy slowly made her way over to her vanity to where her jewellery box sat, and opening it, she pulled out a necklace she'd kept for so long yet hadn't worn, and taking the pendant off of it, she slid the ring over the end of the chain before slipping the long necklace over her head.

She couldn't throw it away, but she couldn't wear it, nor could she let it sit in a box where it couldn't be seen. Granted, the length of the chain kept it hidden as it disappeared below the neckline of her shirt, but she knew it was there, and that's what mattered.

* * *

With the Grand Magic Games having begun, Bickslow and his team had found themselves in Crocus to celebrate and watch along with the fair majority of Fiore. It wasn't the same without the main guilds – namely Fairy Tail and Sabertooth – but it was okay. The atmosphere in Crocus was bright and filled with enthusiasm, and as miserable as Bickslow was, he did enjoy being surrounded by so many people who were bursting at the seams with energy.

It was the last day of the games, actually, and on this particular morning, Bickslow and his team were enjoying what Crocus had to offer. It was a miracle Evergreen and Freed – and Laxus, for that matter - hadn't skinned him alive for what he had sent to Lucy for her birthday. He'd meant what he said to her in his letter, though; he couldn't hold on to it anymore. He'd needed to get rid of it, because each time he saw it in his bag, he just got reminded of the fact that he never got the chance to ask her to actually spend the rest of their lives together, and he was never going to get to ask that. He just couldn't toss it away or sell it, because he really didn't think it belonged with anyone other than Lucy.

So as they walked through the crowded streets of Crocus, they found themselves stopping at almost every little market stand that had been set up; food, drinks, trinkets, clothing – there was everything imaginable and unimaginable in Crocus then, because everyone flocked to the city when the games were on.

Evergreen and Freed were chatting away, discussing what they could get for Laxus and Mira as a gift for their newborn son, Jax, while Bickslow remained silent as usual. He'd had a lack of interest in the entire subject for months, and regardless of how happy he was for his best friend at having a family, he just… didn't particularly care. Laxus had never seemed to mind that he didn't care, and Bickslow wasn't entirely sure why. He'd just never asked, either.

But as his friends chatted away, Bickslow suddenly stopped in the middle of the street when he could have sworn he'd heard a certain something over the noise over the hundreds and thousands of people around him. He ignored the complaints of the man who had bumped into his back when he suddenly stopped, and he ignored the questioning looks that Freed and Evergreen were giving him as they turned around, realising that their friend was no longer walking with them.

All Bickslow could do was turn his head to look out over the sea of people around him, using his height as an advantage. He could have sworn he'd heard a laugh – Lucy's laugh – but he didn't know which direction it had come from. He knew her laugh anywhere, and he'd heard it enough times to know it off by heart.

But as he looked around, he couldn't see that blonde hair on anyone, and he couldn't hear anything over the sound of people talking and yelling, mixed with the footsteps of the thousands of people on the street.

* * *

Lucy still had a small amount of time before she had to meet Jason for the last day of the games, and much like the citizens of Fiore and Crocus, she was out enjoying what Crocus had to offer. Even though she'd lived there for seven months, seeing the city when the Grand Magic Games were on was something else. She hadn't had a chance to experience any of the festivities going on outside the arena during the day the last two times she'd been in Crocus, because both times, she'd spent more time in an infirmary bed to avoid any further injury to herself.

But on this day, she was free to see what went on in the eternally busy streets of Crocus.

Smiling at each of the little stalls with the trinkets and the themed dishes, Lucy found herself coming to stop in front of a small stand that was covered in snow globes of various sizes, each of them with different landmarks from around Fiore and the neighbouring countries.

"Oh my gosh! It's her!"

"I know!"

Lucy looked up suddenly at the hushed whispers between the sales clerks on the opposite side of the small table. A perfectly threaded brow was arched as she stared at the two women quizzically, holding a small snow globe with a miniature version of Kardia Cathedral in the middle of it. "Are you talking about me?" she asked.

The two women both turned shades of pink as they turned back to her, and as they turned to face her, Lucy couldn't help but feel like she'd seen them before. They were twins, each with a dark shade of blue hair, and looked to be in their early thirties. There was something about them that was familiar, yet she couldn't place it.

One of them smiled brightly as she reached across the table, a hand outstretched, and Lucy hesitantly shook it as she put the snow globe down. "Oh, sorry!" the woman exclaimed, a nervous laugh flitting out. "We just… we're just… we know of you from the Sorcerer. You're Lucy Heartfilia, right?"

"Yup, that's me," Lucy replied, shaking the other woman's hand. "Are you sure we haven't met before? I feel like I know you from somewhere…?"

The twins turned to face each other before they turned back to Lucy, and the one who hadn't spoken before finally smiled at Lucy. "We definitely haven't met, but… uh…"

"Our brother was in Fairy Tail, too," the other woman finished.

Lucy's brow rose in her curiosity. "Oh? Who was your brother?"

"Bickslow," the two said in unison, each with somewhat guilty looks on their faces.

Lucy was glad she'd placed the snow globe back on the table, because she was sure she would have dropped it. She could see the resemblance now as she stared at the twins; their hair was the same shade of blue, they each had slightly almond-shaped eyes, and the strikingly high cheek bones.

She had almost completely forgotten that Bickslow did in fact have twin sisters, both of which would have been in their early thirties by that point in time. They'd rarely come up, and on the few occasions he'd talked about his family, he'd only mentioned that he had no idea where they were. He hadn't even known if they were in Fiore anymore.

But that wasn't the case, apparently, because they were standing right in front of her, and slowly, a wide grin split her face once she got her thoughts into a somewhat logical order. This was amazing! She never thought she'd get to meet the rest of Bickslow's living family, and it was something she'd always wished she could do. Even though she wasn't with Bickslow anymore, she was still so excited to be standing in front of the famed twin sisters.

"Oh! Oh my gosh! Of course! I can totally see it!" she beamed. "Oh gosh, I'm so sorry though, I don't actually know your names!" Lucy's cheeks became tinged with pink as she stared at the grinning bluenettes. "I'm not sure why he never told me, I mean I did ask—"

"He never really was the best younger brother," one of them said, cutting Lucy off, much to her relief. She didn't like that she was rambling, because she felt she was making a terrible first impression.

The other woman sighed. "No, he never was, was he?" She began to giggle along with her twin sister for a moment before they both turned back to Lucy, and with a bright smile, the woman with her hair in two braids said, "I'm Sara."

"And I'm Saskia," the other one said.

Lucy reached out to shake both of their hands again energetically. "It is so nice to meet you two!" she said. "How long have you even been in Crocus? Have you been here long, or have you been here the entire time? Oh, I just have so many questions!"

The two laughed again, apparently enjoying Lucy's frantic manner. "It's nice to meet you, too," Sara said while Saskia quickly dealt with a customer and a sale just beside her. "And we've only been in Crocus a few years. Until then, we were in Veronica."

"So you were here for the last two games?"

Saskia nodded as the customer she was serving disappeared back in to the sea of people walking by. "We saw you and your guild in the ones you participated in."

"We didn't particularly take an interest in _you_ until last year's though," Saskia added. "We did cheer for you though. We'd always rooted for Fairy Tail, even though you were the underdogs and no one suspected you of winning two years in a row."

"You took an interest in me?" Lucy asked, her brow furrowing slightly again.

"Of course!" the twins said together.

"You were dating our baby brother," Sara said. "Even though we haven't seen him since he was 17, he's still our brother, and when he just so happens to start dating someone like you, well of course we're going to take an interest."

Saskia sighed before Lucy could respond. "We were hoping you'd be joining our little family, but then you two broke up and we were oh so devastated," Saskia said as she carefully wrapped up a snow globe for another customer in some tissue paper.

"Yeah, well…" Lucy looked down to the array of gifts on the table briefly. She, too, had been hoping she'd be joining their little family, but alas, that ship had sailed long ago. "Wait..." she said then, her brow furrowing even further. "Someone like me? What is that supposed to mean?" she asked, drawing back when she couldn't help but think it was an insult.

The two laughed again. "Oh, nothing like that," Sara said, sensing Lucy's apprehension at their words.

"We just meant that you're you, you know? You're beautiful, seriously, and from what we've heard about you, you're a lovely person. It's just surprising that someone like you would end up with someone like Bicks. Then again, he's probably changed a lot since we've last seen him…" Saskia explained.

Lucy blushed slightly. "Oh, thank you," she mumbled, looking back down. "And, well… trust me, I never exactly planned on falling in love with him, but you know, probably the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Aww! That's so sweet!" the twins chorused, making Lucy blush even more.

"Oh, shush…" Lucy mumbled as she tried her best to hide her smile. "Now, tell me," she said as she looked back up. "Has he always had that habit with his tongue?" It was something she'd always been curious about, and in all the time she'd been with Bickslow, he'd never actually given her a clear answer. She was only left guessing whether it was something he'd done his entire life, or something he'd picked up in all of the years he was in the guild before Lucy had joined and seen what he was like.

"Oh god, he _still_ sticks his tongue out when he talks and laughs?" Sara said, one hand clutching her side as she tried to hold in her laughter, before she turned to her twin who was in a similar position. "Oh, Sas, do you remember that time he got his tongue stuck to that pole in the middle of winter?"

"Oh my god! Yes!" Saskia replied. "Oh, that was the best day ever, I swear. He so had it coming."

Lucy arched a brow in amusement at the laughing twins. "He got his tongue stuck to frozen pole, I'm guessing?" she asked, and when the two nodded and tried their best to form words, Lucy began to laugh with them. She'd gotten used to not being able to stay silent once Bickslow started laughing, but now his sisters, too? Was it a family thing, or something? "Well, I guess children will do stupid things like that," she giggled.

"Pfft, children," Sara snorted.

"He was 16," Saskia finished, only to cause the three of them to laugh even more, and Lucy was left with a mental image of 16-year old Bickslow with his tongue stuck to a frozen pole. How he'd managed to do that was something she couldn't begin to understand, or want to understand.

Suddenly, though, Lucy lifted her arm just enough to look down to small watch on her wrist, and her laughter ceased almost instantly. She hadn't had much time to explore what Crocus had to offer, and with the last day of the games starting incredibly soon, she had to get across town and back to the arena to meet her boss and get ready to report the day's events.

"I'm so sorry, guys," she said apologetically, both of them turning back to her then. "I wish I could stay here and talk to you some more, because you two are really incredibly lovely, but I have to go back to work." Lucy reached into her bag quickly and pulled out a small card and handed it to Sara. "I really would love to get to know the two of you some more. You know, if you'd want to, even though I'm no longer with Bickslow—"

"Oh, that doesn't matter. We could so sit and get coffee some time," Sara said.

"And we'd love for you to meet our families," Saskia added. "My daughter has absolutely adored you since last year's games. Of course, she doesn't know that you were with Bickslow. She just thinks your spirits are adorable."

Lucy smiled. "I'd love to meet her," she said. "I'd love to meet both of your families, actually. But my address is on that card, so you know how to find me!"

Sara tucked the card into her back pocket as she nodded. "We'll send a letter tomorrow or the day after with our addresses. That way, you'll know how to find us!"

"I look forward to it," Lucy replied with another bright smile before she slowly began to turn. "I must be off, though," she said, lifting an arm to wave to the grinning bluenettes. "It was lovely meeting you!"

"Likewise!" the twins chorused, watching the blonde disappear into the sea of people and towards the arena, which was where almost everyone else was heading.

Lucy had never expected something so amazing to happen that day when she'd woken up that morning, but boy, had it lifted her spirits. She honestly hadn't been looking forward to the end of the games, just because all of it had been so boring with no decent guilds being entered, all of them ones that she'd never heard of before. But now, there was just no way her day could be ruined by that boredom.

Instead, she could only think it would get better, somehow. She just had a feeling, and it was a feeling she didn't know where it had come from.

* * *

After a few more seconds of looking over the crowd, Bickslow was convinced his mind had just been playing tricks on him. There was no way that Lucy could be only a few feet away from him, in Crocus of all places. It was impossible; things like that didn't happen.

"Yeah, sorry," he mumbled, quickly pushing past the few people in front of him to catch up to Evergreen and Freed. "Thought I heard something."

"Heard what?" Evergreen asked, pulling off a large chunk of the pastel green cotton candy in her hand as they continued to walk with the crowd.

"Nothing," he replied, the corners of his lips pulling up into a reassuring smile. "Don't worry about it—"

" _Bickslow?_!"

He once again stopped, this time along with Evergreen and Freed, and looked around to see where the voices had come from. First he was hearing Lucy's laugh, and now he was hearing women screech his name? What the hell was going on?

"Over here, you moron!" only one of the voices said that time.

And that time, Bickslow could pinpoint where it had come from, and he quickly turned around to look in that direction, and when he saw just who had shouted his name and called him a moron, he quickly pushed past everyone who stood between himself and the small stall in line with the rest of the other stands along the streets. Evergreen and Freed could only stare in both amazement and confusion as they watched Bickslow push past everyone and suddenly pull two blue haired women into a tight hug.

"Sara?! Saskia?!" he said quickly, pulling back just to stare between the equally as overjoyed women before him. "Holy fuck, what are you doing here?! I haven't seen you since… since I was, what, 17?!"

"Hey, kiddo," Sara said with a bright smile. "Been a while, huh?"

"Longer for you, obviously," he replied with his own grin as he pulled off his visor and pushed his hood back.

Saskia slapped his shoulder while glaring at him through the light green eyes they'd each received from their mother. "You calling us old, huh?"

"Well, I mean, you kinda are—okay! Okay! You're not old!"

The twins nodded in satisfaction to themselves before Saskia turned to serve another customer, and Sara took a step away from the table to get just a little bit further away from the almost deafening noise of thousands of people heading in the same direction on the same street.

Bickslow turned to face Evergreen and Freed then, and quickly motioned them over. "Guys," he said once they'd come to stand just next to him. "So, this is Sara," he gestured to her and she waved at the other two mages, and then to Saskia who did the same thing before turning back to her impatient customer. "And that's Saskia. The twins from hell."

Freed was the first to piece together the information, having remembered talking to Bickslow about his family just after they'd joined the guild, and his eyes went wide when he recognised the names. "As in, your sisters?" he asked, looking back to Bickslow, and when he nodded with his wide grin in place, Freed turned back to face Sara and he quickly thrust his hand out, reaching for hers to shake it vigorously. "Oh, wow, it such such a pleasure to meet you, Sara."

"Likewise," she replied. "And you must be… Freed, correct?" Sara turned to Evergreen when Freed nodded. "So that makes you Evergreen?"

Bickslow paled some. There was only one way his sisters knew the names of his friends, because there was only one place in the entire world where they were published, and that was in the Sorcerer. "Oh god, you read the Sorcerer, don't you?" he muttered, instantly losing his smile.

"Of course," she replied. "Who doesn't?"

And it was a fair question. The majority of Fiore read it, but ever since Christmas, Bickslow had had a hatred for the magazine. He'd never particularly liked it in the first place, but after that first edition that featured Lucy, he'd despised its existence. But even though he hated it, he couldn't bring himself to stop reading it every now and then, not when Lucy occasionally had articles published. Everything else in the gossip-filled pages he just ignored, because whatever Lucy wrote, was the only thing worth reading. Of course, he was extremely biased, but still, he hated the magazine with a passion.

"So you uh… you know about…?" Bickslow left the question unfinished, hoping that the younger twin by four minutes would know what – or whom – he was talking about. They read the magazine, and if they'd been reading long enough to know the names of his team, then there was a very high possibility they knew about Lucy.

"You mean Lucy?"

As Bickslow nodded, looking down to the ground briefly, Saskia came back over to where they stood and lifted a hand to smack the upside of Bickslow's head, forcing him to look up just enough to stare into the disappointed faces of his sisters. "Yeah, we know about her," Saskia said, dropping her hand to rest on her waist, just like Sara had. "We know you were awkward when it came to girls when you were younger, but we hoped you'd have enough common sense to hold on to someone like her!"

"Hey! It was a little complicated, okay?" he defended himself, rubbing the back of his head before he turned to glare at Evergreen and Freed beside him who were sniggering quietly. "Oi, shut up," he muttered.

"Sorry, sorry," Evergreen said, taking another bite of the green cotton candy. "Just finding it hard to picture you as being awkward around girls."

Freed nodded slightly, the corner of his mouth lifted up into a smirk. "It's a rather amusing picture indeed," he added.

"You two are fucking horrible," Bickslow muttered again as he folded his arms across his chest before he turned back to Sara. "Anyway, how long have you been in Crocus?"

She shrugged as Saskia went back to the front of the stall. "A few years. We ended up travelling for a bit after you left, and then we found ourselves in Veronica after a while. They sold Sorcerer Weekly at a few places around town, so we always stayed up to date with what was going on in Fiore. But then we just got bored, and decided to see what Crocus was all about, and then we found ourselves here."

"You should have come and found me or something if you knew about me," Bickslow said.

Saskia came back over then and shrugged. "We talked about it."

"But we decided against it," Sara finished. "You had your own life, and we had our own families to look after. We're not just three years apart anymore, Bicks. As much we wanted to come see our baby brother, it was just going to be too hard on everyone."

Bickslow sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, nodding slightly. He had to admit that it was fair. While he'd been frozen on Tenrou, they'd been living their lives with their own families. It really did make sense to just continue going like that. "Families?" he echoed. "You guys have kids?"

"I have a daughter," Saskia said with a smile. "She's six this year."

"And I have twin boys who just turned four," Sara answered. "You think we were bad? These two are a nightmare already."

"Something tells me that's actually true," Bickslow chuckled. "I'd love to meet them all though. I mean, if I could. It's up to you. If you want me to stay out, then I will."

The twins smiled at each other. "Yeah, we could arrange something. They know of you, but nothing else. We were never sure if we'd ever run in to you, but hey, it happened!" Sara said.

"Small world, huh?"

"Very small indeed," Saskia said, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "But anyway," she clapped her hands once. "I have a feeling the games are about to start soon, and I'm assuming you're in town for that, so I would suggest leaving so you can all get seats."

"What? No, I'd rather stay—"

"Bicks, we can talk later," Sara interrupted, her hands on either side of her younger brother's arms. "Besides, you're kinda making it hard for us to do our jobs."

"Harsh."

"But true," she said with a smirk that apparently ran in the family.

Bickslow sighed. "Alright, fine," he mumbled before quickly pulling both of them into another hug. "You two better be here later."

"We'll be here until sunset," Saskia laughed before she pushed him away, much like Sara was doing. "Now go! We'll see you later!"

"Okay, okay, I'm going!" he said, turning and following behind Freed and Evergreen with a grin on his face. Even though he'd once thought he could live without never seeing his actual family again, he'd come to realise that he probably couldn't. They were his family by blood, and even though they weren't the most important people in his life, and he mostly hated them, they were still his sisters and they always would be. He'd never once expected to run into them in Crocus of all places, but hey, it was a small world.

He was honestly sure as hell glad he had though, and as he walked towards the arena, he felt happier than he had in months.

And as the three disappeared into the crowd, the twins returned to stand at the table covered with their wares and went back to their quickly growing impatient customers. Once they'd thinned out and they were no longer swarmed with customers, Sara turned to the older twin and quietly asked, "Do you think we should have told him we just met Lucy?"

"Nah," Saskia replied, swiftly wrapping up a snow globe in the tissue paper. "I don't think it would have been for the best. Something tells me that he's still in love with her though."

Sara sighed as she handed some change to a man before her. "Yeah, I think you're right," she said quietly. "She really would have made a great sister-in-law, too."

"That she would have."

* * *

Lucy smiled down at the sleeping Dragon Slayer in her lap before she looked back up and out through the window of the carriage. It was the middle of the night, but she was wide awake. She knew she should be sleeping since she was in for a long journey, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. She was far too excited and nervous to even think about sleeping, because through that window, Lucy watched Crocus disappear into the dark horizon.

She'd never expected her day to end the way it had, but she'd never expected a lot of things to happen at all. She'd never expected to come across Bickslow's sisters in the middle of Crocus, and she'd never expected to want to get to know them, especially when she wasn't with Bickslow anymore. She'd also never expected Natsu of all people to crash the Grand Magic Games, almost completely destroy an arena in a matter of seconds, and almost manage to melt her clothes right from her body. And along with that, Lucy had never expected to be sitting on a carriage and heading back to Magnolia.

But as she sat there with her best friend snoring in her lap, she knew it was the right thing. She'd had a feeling that her day had been going to get better, but she'd never expected such a turn of events. To say it had gotten better would be an understatement, because Lucy was almost in a state of bliss, just from having such an amazing day.

Lucy had never expected to be heading back home so soon, not when it hadn't even been a year since she'd left, but seeing Natsu in that arena had made her so painfully aware that she really wasn't going to get what she needed by staying in Crocus any longer. Natsu was going back to Magnolia – to the guild that no longer existed – and Lucy knew she needed to go with him.

Magnolia was her home, and it had always been her home, and it would always be her home. No matter how many painful memories were there, it was always going to be her home.

But it had been long enough that Lucy was ready to face all of those bad memories again, and the only reason she felt ready to do that, was because she was going to take her own advice. Once upon a time, on a rooftop in Magnolia, Lucy had told Bickslow that he needed to take the bad memories and turn them into good memories. Lucy was going to do just that, because Magnolia held more good memories than bad memories. It was those good memories she wanted to relive and remember forever, and she didn't want them to be overshadowed by the bad ones.

They were things in the past, things that she had and was still trying to move on from. It didn't matter where she was, because as long as she remembered they were in the past, then she would be able to stand in Magnolia and smile.

Lucy had realised that what she'd been living in Crocus wasn't the next chapter of her life like she'd thought. It wasn't the next chapter that she'd begin alone, and it wasn't the ending. It wasn't the beginning, either. It was an intermission, of sorts. It had been a break from the reality she realised she'd been running from by leaving, and Lucy had never been the type of person to run from her problems, even though it's what everyone had wanted her to do. And for a time, Lucy had been fine with that. She'd thought that running from Magnolia was the absolute best thing for her, that leaving behind all of her good memories, her friends, her family, her home – everything – was the best idea. But then, seeing Natsu and talking to her best friend, it had made her realise just what she'd been doing, and she didn't want to do that any longer.

It was why Lucy was completely fine with running from the life she'd been living in Crocus. She would gladly leave all of that behind – the job, the house, everything – because none of it meant as much to her as Magnolia and everyone who remained in Magnolia.

She was just so excited to finally head home, and further away Crocus got, the more excited Lucy got. She just couldn't wait to finally step into the streets she loved and missed so much.

* * *

 **Ahhh! It's finally here! It's been so long since I updated (it's been a little over a month, I think), but I finally got this chapter finished. I did consider splitting it up, but I decided against it. I think it works better in one chapter, and it leaves more to imagination. On another note, any errors I missed will get fixed in the next day or two. I know I say it every chapter for every story, but I can't help myself. If I proof-read this one more time, I might just implode.**

 **I also know that I said I wasn't going to be getting anything updated until the middle of November (excluding Shattered, since I've been working on that primarily, and I still am focusing on that at the moment), and then I already mentioned I was hoping to get this up before then anyway (which I succeeded in), but you can ignore that. As some of you were aware, I was getting my Bachelor of Science in Nursing, but that is no longer the case. This was my second attempt at that course (the first time I dropped the course after only a few months, and that was late in 2014), and once again, I have found myself with a lack of motivation to complete it. I don't want to be doing something I don't enjoy as much as I used to for the next three years, and it's why I have decided to change courses. Instead of nursing, I am now getting a Bachelor of Arts and majoring in Literature and Writing, and I'll start that in Feb/March 2016. It's something I'm much more interested in, and I'm incredibly excited for it. With that, it means I have the next four months free, so I don't have exams to study for and assignments to finish, so I can spend my time writing, and do so without feeling guilty and stressing out about my grades.**

 **Anyway, just an update on that. I still won't have an upload/update schedule, just because I am working on a lot of different projects right now, and I don't want to neglect some while I focus on others, even though that was what I was doing for a few weeks.**

 **As a reminder, BixLu week starts on November 1st, and the prologue for my entry, _Shattered_ , is already up. **

**My new story, How I Met You is also up, and if you haven't already gone and checked that out, please do so! I'll love you forever. Hehehe.**

 **I want to say thank you, as usual, to everyone who left a review on the last chapter. The last ones were hard to write, but it's getting a little bit brighter now. Hopefully none of you wanted to cry with this chapter! (I know I didn't, and I definitely cried a little bit while writing and reading the last two)**

 **Please remember to review if you can!**

 **Until next time.**

 **\- April**


	42. Chapter 42

**A/Ns at the bottom of the chapter!**

* * *

Lucy's eyes slowly fluttered open as the sunlight streamed through the open curtains above her bed, and a soft smile graced her lips as she stretched her arms above her head. The blonde slowly sat up on her bed, the familiar pink duvet pooling around her hips as she reached to push the curtains back even more, and she fiddled with the sticky lock on the window until she could push the two panes open.

She took in the street below her with a content sigh, lowering her chin to rest on her folded arms on the sill. The townhouses that surrounded her, the quiet Sunday morning streets, and the flowing canal right below her. It was the same one she'd walked along almost every day, and the same one she saw every morning. As the men in the boat floated past that, whistling a quiet tune that drifted up to her window, she let out a quiet giggle.

She was home, and even though she'd only been back for a week, she'd been far happier than she had been while travelling and living in Crocus. Magnolia would always be home to her, and no amount of time away would change that. Sure, there was still a little something missing – or someone, really – but she couldn't dwell on that. She couldn't dwell on how much she still missed Bickslow, because right then, it was the thing that hurt her the most.

As much as Lucy really did feel like she was home, she knew it just wasn't the same without Bickslow, and it would never be the same. But… Things were getting better, and she was still trying her hardest to live a life full of joy, because it was what Bickslow had wanted for her. She'd promised she'd try and have that life, and she'd never stop trying.

But she had to stop thinking about how much she wanted Bickslow there with her, because seeing all of the places that they'd been together over the course of their relationship just made her heart ache all the more. Walking past Bickslow's apartment for the first time in nearly a year had had her on the brink of tears. It had been more of a home than her own apartment had been in the months they'd been together, and all the memories that had been made and shared in that same apartment had come crashing back. But no matter how much they hurt her heart, to know that Bickslow wasn't there and it was bound to be covered in dust – from the story hanging on the wall above his bed to the book on Seith magic she'd accidentally left on the nightstand – and that they were all just things in the past, they still made her smile. There'd been so many things that she would never forget.

It was the good memories that made it possible for Lucy to stay in Magnolia though, because they made the bad ones hurt just that little bit less. And it wasn't like there were as many bad memories to good, because coming back nearly a year later, Lucy could see that there really weren't as many as she had thought. And as she looked back on all of them, she wondered if it was all because she was doing her best to find those small glimmers of happiness within in terrible memory, and turning them into ones that could make her happy.

She was doing what she'd told Bickslow to do nearly two years earlier, and the concept still held. Because for Lucy, within each terrible memory, there was always something in them to make her smile. It was like that day on the rooftop where she'd fought Bickslow. She hadn't wanted to do it, even when she hadn't known him at all and all he thought of her was something she'd spent months trying to convince him to stop feeling guilty for. It was, as a whole, a terrible fucking day, but it made her smile, and that same terrible day was also one of the best of her entire life. It was the day she'd first met Bickslow, and if Lucy couldn't smile about the time the love of her life came into her life, then she didn't know what she could smile about.

And maybe it was the author in her that made her believing some crazy things, but there had always been a part of her that wondered if things ever would have happened like they had if they'd never met on that day. Fate, destiny, luck, fortune… Hell, call it whatever the fuck you want. She just wanted something to believe in, and she wanted to believe that she'd had the best year of her life with the only person she could or ever would love, because all of that had happened. That was what she smiled about.

But she had plenty of other things to smile about in Magnolia, too, other than her memories. She had her friends and the family she'd missed too much to put into words. Well… most of them, anyway. Before leaving Crocus, Lucy had barely had enough time to quickly write a letter to Cana, just telling her that she'd be coming home. She'd never quite expected to see the guild's resident drunk and half of the guild on the rubble that had once been their building, but it had just been another moment in her week where she'd been on the brink on tears.

To see everyone again after so long… it had been brilliant. But, there were still just a few people missing to make it all complete. Gajeel and Levy hadn't arrived until a few days later, much to Lucy's surprise. Laxus and Mira had been too busy with their newborn son to get out, and according to Lisanna, they still had no idea Lucy or Natsu were back. Erza, Gray, and Juvia arrived around the same time Gajeel and Levy, but still… it was the Raijinshuu she missed the most. They would have made it feel complete, but Lucy knew she had to deal with it all.

So with a hum of content, Lucy finally sat back on her heels in amongst the tangled sheets and closed the window, leaving the curtains open. It really did feel good to be home, and that first night she'd spent in her old apartment – that she was still a little confused as to why her landlady had kept it open for so long – had been the best night of sleep she'd had in a very long time.

But it was another day. It was a start of a new week and she needed to pay someone a visit. She was looking forward to surprising her friends, and more than anything, she hoped her morning wasn't going to end with her running out of her friend's home in tears.

* * *

She slowly climbed the few steps to stand in front of a red door, and with a steadying breath, she raised a hand to knock on it three times.

Lucy waited for what felt like an eternity before it finally opened, and as soon as the familiar blonde who lived in that house opened the door, Lucy's face split into a wide grin.

"Hey, Sparky," she said quietly, giggling at Laxus' shock.

The Dragon Slayer could only stand in his doorway and stare at Lucy, and for a moment, Lucy was wondering if she had broken him. But then he had moved almost impossibly fast and wrapped his arms around the smaller blonde, only lifting her up slightly. "What the fuck are you doing here?!"

She shrugged when Laxus put her back down on the ground and followed him into the hall. "I moved back," she said.

"You what?"

"Well…" Lucy paused when she took a seat on one of the lounges in the living room, and she looked down at her hands as Laxus sat down opposite her. "I realised that I'm not going to get what I want in Crocus," she said. When she looked back up to see Laxus moving his son, Jax, from a bassinet just to the side of the lounge, she smiled softly. _Don't cry, Lucy. Don't cry._ "Magnolia is always going to be home, and I can't just run away from all of my problems, and that's what I did. I ran, because it was what Bickslow wanted me to do, and I promised him that I would try and put it all behind me."

Laxus frowned as he leant back on the lounge and cradled his son, only glancing up to the other blonde in the room. "You know Bicks is going to come back too eventually. Right?" he asked. He'd honestly heard rumours over the last few days about getting the guild back together, but now that he knew Lucy was back home, he knew that they weren't just rumours. If anyone could organise something like that, it would be her.

"I know, and I really want him to," Lucy said sadly as she folded her hands in her lap. "I… I need to see him. I need to tell him…"

"About the baby?"

She nodded and her heart ached with the memory as she looked at Laxus and Jax. "I know that he'll hate me for sure once I do, but I need to tell him about it. He deserved to know a year ago, but I just couldn't then." She took a shaky breath as she forced herself to look back up with a soft smile before standing, and then quickly moved past the small coffee table and sat down next to Laxus. "But anyway. At least I get to meet this little guy now that I'm back, right?"

Laxus watched as she smiled down at the newborn in his arms, but it was a smile that was full of pain rather than joy. He could see that, but he could see what she was doing. She was trying to get past everything; she was facing her demons head on, and in all honesty, he had to commend her for it. Even Bickslow would be proud of her for it, because most people really would run and never look back. She'd had the opportunity to start over and live a life without pain and loss, and hell, did Laxus know she deserved that more than anyone.

But… She'd chosen to come back. She'd left the life she was building and come back to the one she'd had. She'd come home. Or to what was left of it, really. She wasn't running anymore, and Laxus could see that.

"Here," he said as he slowly sat up and gently moved Jax in his arms and towards Lucy.

She looked up in shock then as she almost hesitantly took the baby. "A-Are you sure? I mean… Newborns are so…" she whispered, glancing back down to Jax as she brought him in close with one hand behind his head.

"Don't worry 'bout it," Laxus mumbled as he sat back again. "I've dropped the kid more times than the demon knows. He's fine."

Lucy giggled quietly as she made herself comfortable on the lounge and continued to look down to the wrapped up bundle of nothing but joy in her arms. She really couldn't help but smile, even if she was doing her absolute best not to cry and focus on how it could have been her life. It hurt, but she was going to push past it all, and if that meant starting with holding her best friend's newborn son, then she would. Baby steps.

"He's beautiful," she whispered before glancing up again. "Where is Mira though?"

"Out with Lis or something," Laxus shrugged. "Anyway, Blondie. How long you been back?" he asked.

"About a week. Natsu and I left—"

Laxus sat up suddenly. "Wait, hold the fuck up. Natsu's back too? What?" He could only see his life getting a whole lot more frustrating if Natsu was back. Especially if the guild was reforming.

"Yeah, he is," Lucy laughed. "He kinda crashed the last day of the games. Totally wiped out the guild who won in a matter of seconds, and managed to destroy the arena."

"Of course he did…"

Lucy nodded. "But then I had to explain that the guild had broken up just after he left. It's kind of why I'm back at all, really," she said, sitting back and crossing one leg over the other. "Planning on getting the guild back together in the next few weeks."

"I did hear a few rumours about that," Laxus muttered. "It makes sense now though. But, Gramps is going to take some convincing to come back too. Pretty sure he's off with Granny on some tropical island or something." He shuddered at the mental image.

"I'm sure his favourite grandson—"

"His _only_ grandson," Laxus corrected, a smug smirk on his lips as he turned to the blonde.

"—could convince him to come back once we're rebuilt," she finished. "I think Erza said we could start construction at the end of this week though, so that's good. If everyone pitches in as usual, we could be up fairly quickly."

Laxus nodded before his brow furrowed. "Bicks would've been helpful," he muttered. "I mean, with those damn souls. Makes it a whole lot easier to move the beams and all."

"Yeah…" Lucy whispered sadly as another painful throb of her heart had her chest tightening.

Laxus suddenly became aware of his words and what they'd done then, and his eyes went wide as he sat up again. "Shit, sorry," he mumbled. "I didn't—"

"It's okay," Lucy said. "It was a fair point."

"But still…" He paused when Lucy didn't lift her head and just looked down to Jax who was sleeping peacefully (still) in her arms. "If the guild is getting rebuilt, then he'll probably want to come back. Ever and Freed will at least. They mentioned something about looking at joining Blue Pegasus a few weeks back, actually…"

"Blue Pegasus?" Lucy snorted as she began to laugh quietly, and Laxus could only smirk. "Can you imagine those three in Blue Pegasus? Seriously?" She could see Freed doing well, to an extent, and maybe even Evergreen. But…Bickslow? She just couldn't see. He'd be so out of place that it would be almost painful, even if he did happen to look far too good in a suit.

"Not at all," Laxus chuckled before he cleared his throat. "Which is why I need to ask you if you'd be okay with him coming back." He wasn't going to mention that he wouldn't be bringing up Lucy being in Magnolia, because he'd be lying if Mira's matchmaking tendencies hadn't worn off on him. He wanted to at least see his best friend and someone who had essentially become his little sister at least talk it out, because there wasn't a single person in Fairy Tail who didn't think that the two belonged together.

Just half the shit Bickslow had written in his letters – or what Freed and Evergreen had said about him – over the months had Laxus wanting to tell Lucy just how miserable he still was. He knew Lucy was still miserable too – at least on the inside – and Laxus knew it was because they weren't together. It didn't matter that Bickslow had _thought_ he couldn't make Lucy happy anymore. Granted, it really had made Laxus want to shock some sense into the guy, because it had been one of the more idiotic things he'd thought and done. Because the fact remained that no matter what, only they could make each other truly happy again.

And Laxus knew that they each had come to realise that, regardless of what they'd thought nearly a year ago. The entire thing had been a huge lapse in judgement, and it annoyed Laxus more than he cared to admit. He couldn't help but think that things wouldn't have ended the way they did for the two if they'd actually talked to each other.

But it was in the past, and Laxus really was determined to see Bickslow back in Magnolia. Sure, the guy was probably going to be mad at him for a little while once he realised he'd been tricked into coming back, but it was okay. Mira's optimism had almost worn off on him.

Lucy smiled as she looked up then. It wasn't something she needed to think about at all. She wanted to see Bickslow, and she knew Laxus would be able to get him to come back. "It's fine." And it was mostly fine. It was going to hurt, and she was expecting it to hurt a lot once she told him everything that had happened the year before, but it was okay. She needed to tell him, and she hoped that telling Bickslow about the baby would help her move past it.

She needed that weight to be lifted off her shoulders, and telling Bickslow could relieve almost all of it. It didn't matter that she was worried about what would happen if Bickslow did end up staying in Magnolia for the guild, and she really hoped he would; she knew it was going to be torture to be in the same town for a while until they could sort things out. She just couldn't think about that though, and that's why it didn't matter.

It would matter _eventually_ , but for now, all she needed to do was focus on getting the guild rebuilt and telling Bickslow, all while hoping that he came back in the first place. She could worry about where they'd stand with each other after she'd told him everything she'd been keeping to herself for far too long.

* * *

"Good heavens!"

Bickslow arched a brow from where he lay on his bed, and he let the tiki doll he had in his hand fly away to join the other four zooming around the ceiling. He looked to Freed in confusion as he sat up slightly and propped himself up on his elbows. "What now?" he asked.

Freed looked up from the letter he had in his hands, and quickly glanced to Evergreen who was coming out of the small bathroom to the side of the room, then to Bickslow, and then back to the paper. His brow was furrowed as he read it again. And again. "Laxus says the guild is being rebuilt," he mumbled.

"Well, after the stunt Natsu pulled at the games, is it really that surprising?" Evergreen asked as she began to dry her hair with a towel.

"That is a fair point," Freed said before he looked to Bickslow again. "But would we be returning to Magnolia for Fairy Tail?"

Bickslow quickly looked back between the two when he realised they were both staring at him, and he let his mouth hang open slightly as he tried to think of a response. He knew what it was about though, even without them saying it. They wanted to know if Bickslow was ready to go back to Magnolia, and in truth, Bickslow just didn't know if he was.

They hadn't even been anywhere near the town in the months they'd been travelling Fiore, and it had been because Bickslow had wanted to avoid it. There was just nothing left in Magnolia for him and he didn't want to go back and be reminded of that. And sure, he owed it to Laxus to go back for just a day or two every now and then. The guy was his best friend after all, and he kinda had a baby to meet, especially since he'd essentially become the kid's uncle, as well as a godfather.

Of course, Bickslow was left confused as hell as to why Laxus and Mira would ever trust him to raise Jax in the unlikely event they both died. The worst part about it all was that they named Lucy the godmother, meaning that if Laxus and Mira did die, they would be forced to raise Jax _together_. Because the two were evil mother fuckers; according to Bickslow anyway. He just had to hope that if they died, it was after the kid turned eighteen, because he was already so over trying to explain that things were over between himself and Lucy, and it was because of him.

He'd made that call, and every day, he still hoped it had been the right one. He had no idea where she was, and honestly, whether she was happy or not, but he really did hope she was. Bickslow knew she had her job with the magazine as a reporter, and though it wasn't exactly what she'd wanted to do, it was close. Surely she had to be at least a little happy. It was what he told himself, anyway.

But… If the guild was being rebuilt, then he had just a small reason to return to Magnolia. They'd discussed joining another guild, and Blue Pegasus had been the best option, but Bickslow hadn't been interested in it. Between the Trimens, Ichiya, and Master Bob… He could only shudder at the thought. Blue Pegasus had not been his idea at all; there was no way he was going to be comfortable in a place like that. Not after all the years he'd spent in Fairy Tail.

The only reason they'd talked about joining another guild at all was because they needed the jobs. It was hard being a freelance mage those days, even with the reputation their team held. They just needed a place to settle down again, and Bickslow hated that idea.

And sure, Bickslow could see that Freed and Evergreen would both love to go back and help with building the guild back up, and he knew it would be unfair to stop them. The only problem was that he was scared of going back. He didn't want to be reminded of the things he'd given up on, and he sure as hell didn't want to run into Lucy there, regardless of it being the one thing his heart wanted.

He didn't even know if she would be there though, but he had to know. Lucy would ultimately be the deciding factor.

"Can I see?" Bickslow mumbled as he got up from the bed and padded over to where Freed sat on an armchair, and he reached for the letter before he quickly skimmed over it.

 _Blah blah blah, family update, blah, Natsu set fire to the arena. Was there, saw that. Blah. Natsu is back in Magnolia for the guild, Gajeel and Levy back from the council, blah blah blah… Nothing about Lucy._

His brow became furrowed as he read over it again, and then again. He didn't know if that meant Lucy was still off living her life and enjoying her grand adventure, but if she were back in Magnolia, Laxus would have mentioned it…right? He would have had to, because that was something definitely worth mentioning.

Still, Bickslow didn't know if he was ready to go back to Magnolia. The thought of the guild getting back together was pretty damn amazing, and a part of him would love to be there for it, but he was truly just scared of what would happen to him if he went back. He just really didn't know if he was ready to face everything he'd let go of and left behind again.

* * *

Lucy shook her head as Erza pulled Natsu by his scarf and away from the pile of support beams and over to another part of the construction site where he was actually required and could be of use. Lucy could hear the Re-quip mage scolding the fire-breathing idiot, and she smiled softly as he navigated the mess.

She ducked under a heavy beam that Elfman was carrying, and she stepped over a smaller bundle of planks when Max dropped them, and then around two other members who were doing their best to carry another beam over to where it was needed. Everyone was doing their part, and even though construction had only begun a few days earlier, the amount of people helping had doubled, and with each day, Lucy saw even more familiar faces. Word had quickly spread around Magnolia and the surrounding towns about Fairy Tail's upcoming grand re-opening, and Lucy absolutely adored just how many of the original members had returned to help out.

"How's the paperwork, Levy?" she asked with a bright smile when she finally made it over to where the Solid Script mage had set up her temporary office. When it came to filling out the legal documents that would make Fairy Tail a legal guild once again, there weren't many people who were capable. And, given that Levy had worked for the magic council over the months she'd been away, she knew better than anyone there as to how those kinds of things worked.

It didn't help that no one really wanted to fill out the near hundreds of pages of documents, either. Lucy included.

"Boring," Levy sighed as she dropped the page she'd been reading and onto one of the two stacks in front of her. "I'm beginning to see why Master never did any of the paperwork. I never had this much when I worked for them!"

Lucy giggled as she gently placed her own stack of paper down – flyers for around town that would feature the date the guild was finally re-opening, and the details for the celebration – on the edge of the table. "Aw, come on. I'm sure it's not that bad."

"I suppose you're right, but it's still frustrating and I'm bored out of my mind."

"Just think, Levy," Lucy said as she ducked slightly, just missing the plank that went catapulting over her head when someone behind her warned her of it. "You only have what? Thirty pages—"

"Seventy-three."

"—to go, and then we'll be a legal gui—"

"LAXUS!"

Lucy suddenly spun around, pausing mid-sentence when she heard two distinct voices coming from where the half-built gates were, and her eyes went wide as she saw none other than Freed and Evergreen bolt across the construction site and over to where Laxus and Mira sat with Jax.

She could hear her heart beating in her ears, and she could feel her hands begin to shake. Everything around her got drowned out, and all she could do was watch the two run to Laxus, just like everyone else was doing.

Slowly she tore her eyes away from them, and she looked back to the gates before she quickly began to search the area, turning her head every which way. The first thing she felt when she realised Bickslow was nowhere to be seen was worry, and her gut twisted when her mind automatically assumed the worst. She couldn't stop herself from reaching for the ring that hung on the chain around her neck, her hands clasping it as they shook.

What if something had happened to Bickslow in the last few weeks? What if he got hurt, or worse? She couldn't bear to stomach that thought, and she was honestly beginning to feel ill. But surely she would have known if something had happened to him in that time. Surely Laxus would have told her if that were the case. That's what she told herself, anyway.

But where was he? Evergreen and Freed were there, and she could assume it was because of the guild. Laxus would have told them that. Lucy was sure of that. But maybe he wasn't coming back with the rest of his team. Maybe he thought she'd be there and that was enough to have him avoid it all, and just thinking about that possibility had Lucy feeling guilty. She didn't want things to be that way, where Bickslow though he had to avoid Lucy, especially when it meant he'd essentially be losing his team. That just wasn't fair.

"Lucy."

Her head snapped up then, and suddenly, the blood rushing in her ears wasn't as loud and everything slowly fell back around her. She could see everyone slowly going back to what they were doing – Erza once again dragging Natsu away from one section, Gray and Gajeel nailing long screws into some of the beams to connect them, and Lisanna busily flitting around and handing out refreshments – and she could see Freed talking to Mira. She could see Laxus watching her, and when she slowly turned her head to the side, she saw Evergreen smiling at her softly.

"How are you going?" Evergreen asked softly before pulling Lucy into a hug. Evergreen could feel the blonde shaking in her arms, and she could feel how tense her muscles were. She knew what it was about, too, and she didn't blame her.

"I… I don't… Is he? Where…" Lucy mumbled. She couldn't have formed a proper sentence right then if her life had depended on it, and she wanted to curse herself for it. Her emotions and thoughts were an absolute mess, and had it been about anything else, she really would hate herself for being in a state.

But it was because it was about Bickslow's wellbeing and location that she couldn't. She just had to know something, and after knowing absolutely nothing about him or his team, she just needed something. She needed Evergreen to give her that.

So when Evergreen pulled away and kept her hands on the blonde's shoulders, she smiled softly again. Lucy wouldn't have had to say anything at all for Evergreen to tell her where Bickslow was, Just from seeing her, she knew that's what she needed. And she didn't blame her for it, because had Evergreen known where Lucy had been over the months, she would have told Bickslow.

"Hargeon," she whispered. Just one word. It was all she needed to say for Lucy to know, and all she did was nod before running off.

Lucy couldn't have stopped herself from running if she'd tried to, and she had no intentions of doing so. She knew where he was, and she had to be there. She had to see him, and she needed to talk to him. She'd promised herself that when she saw Bickslow, she would tell him everything, and that moment was finally there.

* * *

Her hands were shaking as she slowly walked along the quiet street in Hargeon, and when she saw the familiar industrial building with the stained glass windows that looked out over the water, she had to take a deep breath to calm her nerves.

She was so close, and she was absolutely terrified. But she was also excited. She was terrified, excited, nervous, worried…plus every other emotion you could feel, most likely. Calling herself a mess wouldn't even come close to describing how she felt; she was an emotional mess.

When the doors were right in front of her, she lifted the long chain from where it usually sat hidden below the neckline of her shirt, and she looked to the diamond ring on it. Her fingers closing tightly around the band, sucking a deep shaking breath into her lungs. Glancing back up to the doors, she took another steadying breath. _You can do this, Lucy_ , she told herself. She needed that reassurance, even if it was just from herself.

So after staring at the doors for what felt like an eternity, Lucy finally gently lowered the chain from her trembling hands to let it fall against her chest again, and instead reached out for the heavy steel doors right in front of her, and slowly, she pushed them open.

* * *

 **Welp. Little bit of a shorter chapter this time around. I apologise. Hopefully the next one will be longer since this was really just a filler. I still hope you enjoyed it though!  
**

 **Anyway, yeah... so, a little bit of a cliffhanger. The next chapter is going to have a lot in there. It also may or may not make you cry. Maybe. That's all I say on that for now. Heheh.**

 **Thank you all so much for the reviews on the last chapter! You guys know I absolutely love reading them, even if you call me evil (lookin' at you, Kura JIO...). Now, time for a few replies!  
IrishMaid - **Consider Bickslow finding out about Natsu melting Lucy's clothes off a done deal. Eventually. It will be there one day... I promise. **  
DeathKitsune666 -** Thank you! I'm actually super excited about my new classes, even if they are still a few months away. I still just love how I'm turning something that started out as a hobby into something that I can actually get a career out of... Well, sort of. Not really, lol. Oh well. Still a while away anyway. **  
Snibs13 -** Yup. No matchmaking sisters... Yet. They will come back though!

 **Also, huge thank you to _bixlu_ _lover_ for being an amazing beta and helping me with everything lately, as usual.**

 **Just a reminder that my BixLu Week story is still going! Still have a few more prompts to get through before I'm done with that. Sorry. ;)**

 **And as usual, please remember to review if you can!**

 **Until next time.**

 **\- April**


	43. Chapter 43

**A longer chapter, as promised.**

* * *

Stepping off the train and onto the platform in Magnolia had everyone but Bickslow smiling. He couldn't smile. Not when he was almost positive Lucy was there too.

Until Bickslow had stepped onto that platform, he really hadn't been sure if Lucy would be there. He'd hoped and wanted to assume that she was still off and living a hopefully happy life, wherever that may be, and that she didn't know about the guild, or at least realised that it would be a far better decision to stay away from it all. Bickslow had needed her to stay away, especially when he knew that coming back would be too hard for her.

It didn't matter that Bickslow knew that Lucy was the strongest woman – no, _person_ – he'd ever met and had the great pleasure of knowing. He knew that she was the type to fight for something and never give up; she never backed down and she never ran from anything. And her strength was just one of the countless things Bickslow loved about her.

But no matter how strong she was and how much he loved her because of it, he knew that there were some things that really were worth running from. Especially if running and giving up meant leaving a life full of sorrow and misery behind, and running towards one full of hope and happiness. Eventually.

Even then, though, running wasn't Lucy being weak. She would never be weak in Bickslow's eyes, and he loathed the time that he'd thought that of her, someone he knew nothing about at the time. If Lucy had been weak, she would have stayed in Magnolia and let everything get to her. If she had been weak, she would have bottled everything up and closed herself off even more, and watched the world try its best to revolve and move on around her.

But Lucy was strong, and she hadn't done that. She hadn't stayed in a place that was hurting her, and she'd found the strength and had the courage to walk away from a life she'd once loved. She'd been able to uproot her entire life and leave the ones she loved behind for a chance at a happier life.

Bickslow was almost envious of that strength too. He wasn't strong, not like her. He was weak. If he had been Lucy, he wouldn't have been able to leave. He would have let everything get worse because he just wouldn't have had the strength or courage to get away from it all, not when his entire life was there. It didn't matter that he'd actually left, either. Bickslow leaving nearly a year earlier hadn't been him being strong. No, it had been him being weak.

The hardest thing Bickslow would ever have to do in his entire life hadn't been because he was trying to be strong, but because he was weak. Lucy had always been the strong one, not him, and when he'd needed to be the strong one for a change, he hadn't been able to. He hadn't known how to; leaving was because he'd run out of ideas and he'd let himself believe it was the best thing for her.

He had run from his problems because he hadn't been strong enough to help his girlfriend when she'd needed him. But he just hadn't known how to help her. Leaving had truly been the last resort, but Bickslow hadn't been able to stop himself from wondering about what could have happened if he'd been just that little stronger. Maybe if he'd been stronger – a better person and a better boyfriend, even. God knew that that he wasn't the best, and even then, he still knew he'd never quite deserved to have someone like Lucy as his girlfriend – he would have been able to help her. Maybe he would have something that would make her come out of that nest she'd crawled in to.

It didn't matter how many times Bickslow told himself, or Evergreen and Freed told him that it really had been all for her benefit, that leaving, though the hardest thing he'd ever done or could ever do in his entire life, hadn't been for nothing. The thought that there might have been something else he could have done to help her had always been at the back of his mind, and there hadn't been a single day where had hadn't needed to remind himself that he'd done his absolute best to help her and make her happy again.

But when he stepped off that train and onto that platform in Magnolia, Bickslow knew that Lucy was there somewhere. She wasn't off enjoying her life as a reporter, moving on and getting happier. She had come back and Bickslow knew it was because of the guild.

He didn't even know how he knew she was there. Not really, anyway. It was just a feeling, if anything; it was like a tug on his soul. It was the only way Bickslow could explain it, and he'd felt something similar when he'd left Magnolia in the first place. It was something Bickslow would never be able to completely understand, just because he felt like it was something that went above him. It went above everything physical or even really emotional, because Bickslow could tell that it was about Lucy being _the one_.

And he'd never believed in stuff like that until he'd met her, and he sure as hell hadn't believed in the idea of there being that one person for everybody for a while after that. He didn't quite believe in the idea of soulmates existing, and Bickslow knew it was strange that he didn't considering his magic, but it was just one of those things he didn't believe in. Not really, anyway.

Or at least he hadn't until he realised just what that feeling was when he'd left, and again when he'd come back. _If_ soulmates existed, then Lucy would be his. Without a doubt. But it was just something else he couldn't quite describe, because it was just a feeling. She was the woman he was supposed to – and had been more than willing to, not to mention excited over – have spent the rest of his life with. He loved her more than anything in the entire world, more than life itself, and even himself. She was everything he needed, and in his head, that constituted her being his soulmate. Plus a million other things that he couldn't put into words, because he didn't think they existed. Not to describe Lucy the way he wanted to, anyway.

But still, she was there somewhere. He knew it and could feel it because of that, and even when he so desperately wanted to see her – to see her gorgeous face again and that smile – he was terrified. He was absolutely terrified of seeing her, and it had him almost shaking and not being able to breathe on the platform.

He wanted to see her, but he couldn't. He was so scared of seeing the one woman he loved more than anything in the world because he was scared of what she thought of him. He was scared of her hating him, especially after the stunt he'd pulled with sending her the ring. She had been supposed to be getting over him and forgetting about him, not being reminded of the actual promise that he'd broken.

Bickslow had quite literally promised to propose and marry her. It had just come up in one of the weird conversations they had before bed, where Lucy had asked not too long after he'd taken her back to the place everything had begun if he really was going to propose. And he'd promised he would. Eventually. When she least expected it, maybe.

He'd broken a promise he'd never wanted to break, or expected to break. He didn't even want to think about how much he'd actually hurt her by leaving when she'd needed someone the most. If Lucy hated him, then Bickslow knew he deserved it. If he'd ended up breaking her heart, then he'd find a way to live with it. Because after all, he'd made her promise that she would leave and never look back if he ever did break her heart again.

It was everything she could feel and think of him that had Bickslow so terrified and anxious about finally seeing her again after all that time, and even though he so desperately hoped that she still loved him at least a little bit, and had forgiven him and actually seen the reasoning behind everything he'd done, he couldn't see her right then.

He knew he'd have to face her eventually, but then right, it was all too much. He needed just a little bit more time to get his thoughts into order. He needed to convince himself that nothing was as bad as it seemed, and that when he did finally see her again, she wouldn't be telling him how much she hated him.

So Bickslow looked up to Evergreen and Freed before him then as he slowly trudged behind them on the platform. The two had been so excited to finally come back to Magnolia and to help with the guild, and Bickslow had had to admit that it had worn off on him just a little bit. "Guys," he said quietly then, just loud enough to get their attention as they stopped and turned around. "I can't… I think I need just a few more days…"

"What do you mean, Bickslow?" Freed asked. The two mages had lost their excited grins, and instead they were both frowning at the obviously troubled Seith mage.

He just shrugged. "The town. I can't do it right now. I just need a few more days to get my head around everything," he explained. He wasn't going to tell them that he knew Lucy was there, and he sure as hell wasn't going to say that he was too afraid of seeing his ex and the one person he wanted to see more than anything.

But Bickslow's explanation was enough for his two friends. They knew coming back wasn't going to be particularly easy for Bickslow, but he'd assured them it would be okay, and they believed him. Eventually. But if he needed just a few more days, then that was okay. They weren't going to force him into anything, and Bickslow knew better than anyone what he needed.

"Where will you go?" Evergreen asked quietly.

"I'll probably just go to Hargeon. Stay there for a bit then come back and sort out my apartment, I suppose," he shrugged. The gym was a place he could stay and could get everything out, anyway. "I'll um… I'll just leave now. Get there before noon, I guess." He turned and picked up his bag to throw it over his shoulder, and he waved behind himself as he quickly headed over to the ticket booth.

He could barely hear his friends behind him over the sound of the trains and the other people, but he wasn't really listening either. All Bickslow knew was that he needed to get out, and the sooner, the better. The longer he stood on that platform in that town, the harder it was to breath.

Bickslow just couldn't deal with it all right then. He needed to leave to get his thoughts into order and remind himself one last time that he'd done everything for a good reason. And then maybe, in a few days, he'd be ready to come back and try again. He'd be ready to face Lucy then. Hopefully.

But even if he wasn't ready to face Lucy, he would still go and find her. Bickslow knew that by then he wouldn't be able to stop himself from doing so. His heart would win out and his desire to see her smile and hold her would get the better of him, and there would be nothing he could do about it.

But it was just a few days he needed. Just a few more days, and hopefully, he'd be ready to face all of his demons and the one perfect angel once again.

* * *

High above the ground with just a few thin mats beneath him should he fall, Bickslow balanced on just one of his babies. His palm was flat on the top of it, his feet together above him, and his other arm outstretched to the side to keep him steady.

His breathing remained steady as he channelled his focus into staying upright and keeping his balance, and he ignored the way his singlet was falling down and towards the ground. As long as it didn't get in his eyes, he didn't care much. It was hard to avoid unless he went without the shirt, and even then, his loose basketball shorts weren't exactly staying as long as they were supposed to be. It was just something that couldn't be avoided when you stayed upside down, and clothes conforming to the gravitational pull was something he was used to.

Bickslow pushed his head back to look to one of his other babies floating just a few feet in front of him then, along with the rest of them. All in a line above the mats and all at the same height, ready for Bickslow to let them move when he himself was ready to move.

"You ready, babies?" he asked when he slowly switched to balance on his other hand, and he tilted his head back even more to see them all bounce around in the air ever so slightly.

"Ready! Ready!" they chanted, and a wide grin split his lips.

All he had to do was push off on his hand enough to get him into the air, only to flip himself around to land on another doll on one foot, before quickly pushing off that one and using it as a stepping stone to to flip himself around again to land on his hands on another one. Just with a few more twists if he really wanted to show off, but right then, he wasn't planning on doing that. It was simple enough, really, but the entire thing was about trust. He had to trust his babies to get to where he needed them without him controlling them and moving them himself. If they weren't in the right place at the right time, or just a few millimetres off or a few milliseconds out, he could land flat on his back. And if he wasn't using it for training purposes, then… Things could end pretty badly.

But Bickslow trusted his babies, so he wasn't really that worried about landing flat on his back. Or on his stomach. Or on his head. But still, the mats were there just in case anyway. He hadn't really moved them around that much, since after all, half of the gym floor was covered in mats. He had a fair few of them all lined up along his tumbling mat too, and god knows he'd found himself staggering off onto them or just completely landing on them more than once in the all the years his team had had the place. They were just precautionary measures. Just in case his first attempt at not completely controlling his babies' movements to keep him in the air ended slightly horribly.

He believed he wouldn't need them though, because he trusted his babies. A lot.

As Bickslow carefully switched hands again, he took a steadying breath, closed his eyes, and all of the muscles in that arm tensed, just enough to push him off and into the air. Just when he was sure he should have been landing on one, given that he was supposed to stay at the same height, he realised he was falling.

And Bickslow fell hard, and with a loud thud and a groan, he landed flat on his back on the mats that he was wishing were just a little bit thicker. _Well that wasn't supposed to happen_. "Babies… I thought you were ready," he groaned, slowly blinking his eyes open to stare at the rafters high above him as he slowly moved his arms out and his legs. _Good… At least I can still move… Well, sort of._

"Sorry. My fault, I suppose."

That voice. That one voice that was music to his ears, and it quietly rang out over the hall.

And then everything stopped. He was sure he heard the wooden dolls that his babies were in fall to the floor as he involuntarily cut his magic off, and he was almost certain he'd stopped breathing, just like his heart had stopped beating. He couldn't move anymore. He couldn't think. He just couldn't do anything.

All Bickslow could do was stare up at the rafters with wide eyes as everything started again. The sound of his own heart beating in his ears drowned out the sound of footsteps approaching, but he knew they were getting closer. And as they got closer, all Bickslow wanted to do was move. And hell, did he really fucking want to breathe. That was one thing that hadn't started up again, and it was beginning to get a little uncomfortable.

 _Move… Just move._ It was just a whisper in his all too quiet mind, but it was enough. That desire to just see her again was enough to have him remembering how to barely breathe and move just enough. Bickslow slowly willed himself to have his tongue dart out just enough to wet his dry lips, and swallowed, finally getting some air into his lungs.

Slowly, he pushed himself to sit up on his knees after he'd rolled to his stomach, and he sat back on his heels when he finally found it in himself to look up. Then he saw her, and his hands fell limply to his sides when he finally did.

Bickslow was left completely speechless as he watched her slowly continue to walk towards him, and the closer she got, the harder it got to breathe again. He just sat there and stared, and he fought the urge to cry. He really did. Seeing her again… That soft smile on her lips and the way her doe eyes constantly sparkled. He'd missed that. Truly.

He'd missed _her_.

For so long, all he could think about was seeing her even though he'd hoped he'd never have to again. He hadn't wanted to because he'd known it was going to be painful, and especially so for him. He was going to be reminded so brutally of what he'd left, and then everything he'd left behind would have been so close to him, yet so far at the same time.

And right then, that's what it was like. She was so close, and yet so far. But hell, had he missed her. Seeing her face again after so long had had him wishing none of what had got them to that point had happened, hoping that the last year had just been like their first one together. Seeing her face again had his breath catching and his heart skipping a beat, just like it always did when he saw her.

"Hi," she whispered once she'd come to a stop just in front of Bickslow. Just standing there in front of him, Lucy was fighting the urge to let the tears fall from her eyes. Just like she had been from the first second she'd seen him perched on one of the babies and he hadn't known she was there yet.

To actually see the love of her life again when she had spent the better part of a year wondering if he was okay, it had Lucy seriously struggling to stay on her feet. She could understand why Bickslow wasn't moving, because if he was feeling like she was – like her heart wanted to just jump out of her chest, and all she wanted to do was run to him to and remember what it felt like to be in his arms – then she just didn't blame him for looking so almost shocked. But she had done her best to move, because she had to be closer. She couldn't fall to her knees on the other side of the room.

Just standing there, barely a few feet away, it wasn't close enough though. It wasn't close enough for Bickslow either, and when his gaze slowly lifted again to stay locked with hers, he found himself slowly lifting a hand. He needed to hold her. Or at least just her hand or something. Just one touch. _Something_.

Lucy choked back on a sob and let the first tear fall and skate down her cheek when she lifted her own hand and their fingers loosely laced together. Just one touch to know that it was all real and it wasn't her mind playing tricks on her.

But just one touch wasn't enough for Lucy, and Bickslow quickly realised the same as his own eyes filled with tears. So swiftly, he remembered how to move, and with his hand around hers, he pulled her down as she leant down with the same thought in her mind, and he wrapped his arms tightly around her to bury his face in the crook of her neck.

He couldn't have held her any closer if he'd tried, but he did try nonetheless. One arm around her waist and gripping the fabric of the shirt, and the other at the back of her head and tangling up in the flaxen tresses. Feeling Lucy in his arms again was almost like nothing else. All Bickslow wanted was to stay there forever, because with Lucy there like that, he could forget about everything and just pretend that everything was back to normal. The world could disappear around them like it usually did, and for just a moment, he could pretend he was happy

He could be happy because he had the love of his life in his arms again, holding him just as tightly as he was holding her, and he could pretend that nothing had changed.

But so much had changed, and as much as they both wanted to just ignore it, they also both knew they couldn't. Because so much had changed.

Lucy sniffled when she finally managed to pull her own head away from where it was resting on his shoulder, and a watery laugh escaped her lips when she met his glistening eyes again. It was rare to see Bickslow cry – or close to it at all – but she'd seen it. She had seen all of the things he let no one else see, and right then, that included the way the usually garnet eyes had a barely there and soft green glow to them. Lucy knew what it meant too and why it was happening, but she didn't care. She knew he couldn't hurt her and that was because she'd seen it before. She hadn't minded the first time it had happened, and she sure as hell didn't mind then.

She lifted a hand to brush against his jaw, and her thumb gently swiped across his cheek as she slowly moved to let her forehead rest against his. "It's been a while," she whispered.

"It has," he breathed. He couldn't help but let out his own airy chuckle with that and smile for just a brief moment. Lucy's smile had always been so contagious, and even then when there were tears streaming down her face, Bickslow could see the happiness in those big brown eyes of hers.

Just seeing that had Bickslow closing his eyes when he felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from his heart. Everything had been because he'd wanted Lucy to be happy again, and Bickslow could see that she was then. Constantly, it was what he'd always wondered. Every single day he had questioned whether everything had been worth it or if it would still be worth it, and now, Bickslow knew that it hadn't all been for nothing. He hadn't made himself miserable for so long for nothing.

And whether Lucy had been happy for a while, or she was happy just because of him in that moment – which he so desperately hoped for, since in that moment, Bickslow felt happier than he had in an incredibly long time – he just had no idea. He just knew that she was actually happy in that moment, and it was an amazing feeling for Bickslow to see that.

His hand in her hair slowly moved as his fingers ran through the soft strands, and his brow furrowed slightly against hers. "Your hair is longer," Bickslow murmured. Her hair had been the same for so long, and just something as simple as that was just a painful reminder that everything had changed. Everything was different and nothing was the same anymore. Nothing was the same between them, and he had to remember that.

But still, he had to admit she looked just as good with long hair as she did with short. But maybe he was a little biased in his opinion, because she looked good with anything. To Bickslow, it had never really been about her physical and outer beauty. The fact that she was drop dead gorgeous and hands down the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen had been irrelevant. He had never fallen in love with her because of that; it was her inner beauty he loved, and that was the way it had always been.

Lucy laughed quietly again then, only to drop one of her own hands to the fabric of his shirt as she lifted it up slightly. "And you got a tattoo," she replied. Her eyes slowly roved down his face, away from his entrancing eyes and the dark mark across the bridge of his nose, past the suddenly wide grin, and down to where her hand was as she slowly continued to push the side of the shirt up.

Her fingers delicately traced over the large black key that sat just above the faded scar that was on his side and curved onto his stomach. From the almost heart-shaped bit, to the 'always' in the fancy scrawl that made up the stem and connected it all, to the bow with the slight motifs that reminded her of Aquarius' key.

"Got far too drunk on Valentine's day," Bickslow mumbled then, closing his eyes and just focusing on the way she ran her fingers over his scars; across where he knew his tattoo the size of one of his scars was, down over the one on his side, and along the straighter one on his back.

Just her touch alone had every single muscle relaxing as one, and he did his best to not let himself get too deep into his own mind. All he wanted to do was pretend that everything was back to normal and that nothing had changed.

"Bickslow."

But then the way Lucy said his name had him opening his eyes again, and as she brought her hand back up hold his face between them both, he was once again reminded that everything had changed. He'd made it so. And he could see the fresh tears brimming in her chocolate eyes as he met them with his own, knowing full well that they'd returned to the usual shade they were. Her smile was gone and the happiness was just in the background, buried beneath the pain. And it was breaking his heart to see that.

Lucy didn't want to be like that though. More than anything, she wished she didn't have to say the words that she'd soon be saying, because just sitting there with Bickslow had been the happiest moment she'd had in a long time. But she was going to ruin it for them both, and she knew that. She had to do it though.

It was why she'd come there in the first place. It wasn't to see Bickslow; to hold him and be held by him. It was to tell him about the chance at a family she had lost. He needed to know, and Lucy had known that for a long time. And now, after nearly a year, he was finally going to know.

It was going to break her own heart to bring it all back up, and she knew it would because she could feel it tearing apart at the seams as she sat there, but it had to be done. She would face all of that pain and deal with all that misery, grief, and guilt again because she knew it was the right thing to do.

"I-I… I need you to know that I love you, okay?" she whispered as her thumbs brushed across his cheeks again. "I never did stop loving you, and I never will stop loving you. I need you to understand that."

And Bickslow did know. He'd doubted whether she would still love him after what he'd done, but somewhere, deep down, he'd known. They were supposed to have spent the rest of their lives together, had a family and grown old. Together.

He'd screwed all of that up though. For Lucy. And right then, Bickslow was only finding himself wondering if it really had been worth it. He knew their happy moment was quickly ending, and even though all he wanted to do was tell her how much he loved her, he couldn't.

When he remained silent, Lucy quickly leant forward to press their lips together, and she choked back a cry as she felt another tear roll down her own cheek. She'd just needed to feel that again. Just once more, because she knew she was going to be ruining more than just a moment.

And just as quickly, after a kiss that was far too short in both of their opinions, she took a shaky breath as she pulled back, and she looked back into the red eyes that were so full of concern and worry. But she couldn't hold it. She couldn't see the way it would crush him, because it would just crush her all the more. It would crush her soul to see the pain it would cause Bickslow.

"I… I was pregnant," she finally whispered, her eyes closing when she felt that first sharp stab in her heart as Bickslow dropped his hands, finally disentangling from her hair and where it had been on her waist. "Last year."

"…What?" He wasn't sure he'd heard her right at all.

She dropped her head even more and let the tears fall onto her lap and she did her best to squeeze her eyes shut. "I wasn't very far along when I…when I lost it…" she whispered again. "I-I had wanted to t-tell you that we were go-going to have a b-baby, but I just w-wanted to wait until the right m-moment. I…I found out on that l-last job I took b-before you took that one at 8-Island. A w-week before I-I got back I found out, and as m-much as I w-wanted to tell you as soon as I got back, I-I just… couldn't…"

Bickslow couldn't do anything. He couldn't move, he couldn't breathe. He could only sit there in shock and listen to the words he hadn't expected to be hearing, and didn't want to be hearing.

"A-And then you got hurt a-and I was so worried about you… I just wanted you to wake up so I could tell you, but… B-But then everything with T-Tartaros got so out of hand, and… And…" She let out a single heart wrenching sob when her chest got unbearably tight. Everything was coming back, and Lucy was sure it felt worse than it had in the last year. "And I just h-hate myself, and I blame myself for w-what happened, a-and you s-should hate me b-because I… Because I lost _our_ baby."

And oh, was that was the truth. Lucy knew she shouldn't hate herself or blame herself as much as she did, but she couldn't help it. There had been something living inside of her, and then there just… hadn't been. And even if there was nothing she could have done to prevent it (she knew that much), it still hurt like hell to know that she hadn't been able to protect and nurture her own unborn child when it had needed it.

She'd almost felt like a failure, but she couldn't tell Bickslow that. She couldn't tell Bickslow just how much it had hurt her and how it had really made her feel, because she didn't want him to feel sorry for her. She knew he would if he knew everything, because she knew Bickslow. He would put everything – absolutely everything – aside to make her happiness the priority or to just make sure she was okay. It was something he had always done, and as much as she loved that, she didn't want that then.

She wanted to deal with it all on her own again. She needed to do it all alone again, and she was fine with that.

"And I c-couldn't face you because of it. I d-didn't w-want you to hate me because I d-didn't want you t-to leave, because… Because e-everyone else left and…" She paused to shake her head slightly. It wasn't about everyone leaving. Not then. "That doesn't matter," she mumbled. "I just… I-I was s-so worried that I would t-tell you what had h-happened and I j-just wanted to deal with it on my own, but… But it was h-hard. And I just n-needed you to know what had happened… What I-I'd done… A-And that it was n-never about you n-not being able to m-make me happy, b-because you c-could… You a-always could and you a-always will be able to. I-I just… wanted t-to try and do it all on m-my own and k-keep you from getting hurt, and I-I knew that it was w-wrong of me to do that… and I'm… I'm s-sorry."

She gave Bickslow a few moments to say something – anything at all – but he just remained silent, and the longer he did so, the more it hurt. She could feel that pain in her chest that made it damn near impossible to breathe and was like something was forcibly pulling her heart apart, twisting it and crushing it until it was nothing but dust.

But she'd expected that. Truly. It still hurt like hell though, and when the silence became too painful for her, Lucy slowly pushed herself from where she knelt on the thin mat to stand before Bickslow. She reached up to dry her eyes as she slowly began to walk backwards on shaky legs, and finally seeing the look on Bickslow's face had what was left of her heart breaking into smithereens.

He just looked so lost. The way his usually so vibrant eyes seemed dull, and weren't focused on anything at all. He didn't move at all, not even to blink, and Lucy couldn't help but think he'd broken him. She had broken his own heart and soul just as much as she had her own, and it had her remembering just why she'd never wanted to tell him any of it in the first place.

"I'm s-so sorry, Bickslow," she choked out finally, the tears continuing to stream down her face as she slowly backed away. She couldn't stay. Not then. "I-I never wanted you to get hurt."

And by the time Lucy was long gone, the heavy doors having slammed closed behind her, it had been too late for Bickslow to try and salvage anything. He just hadn't been able to move, let alone breathe. He couldn't. He'd only been able to listen to every single word that left her lips.

He had just desperately been trying to wrap his head around it all, but he was failing. Dismally. To know… To know that they had had a baby on the way at some point, for however brief it was, it brought just a tiny glimmer of joy to his life then. To know that an actual family had been within reach. It was all Bickslow had wanted. All of it with Lucy.

But then… That had been gone, and she'd been dealing with it on her own. It wasn't the fact that she'd lost the baby that hurt Bickslow. No, it was that she'd gone through all of it alone. And for so long, she'd kept that to herself. He could only imagine just how she'd felt when all of it had been happening, and even then, Bickslow knew his imagination would come nowhere close to what she was actually feeling. He knew there was more she wasn't telling him, and he wanted to believe it was okay, that she had her reasons, but he just couldn't.

He couldn't believe that when he all he wanted to do was know everything. That's what he was for, wasn't it? Weren't they supposed to do everything together? If he'd known, he would have been there for her. He wouldn't have left if he'd known what it had all been about. Because knowing that the way she'd been before he'd left was because of what she'd been going through alone was just a reason for Bickslow to hate himself.

Bickslow wasn't mad at her though, nor did he hate her. He could never hate her, and even if he could, it would never be because of something like that. Never in a million years. But she couldn't see that. And he knew he needed to make her see that, but he didn't know how to.

Even then, though, as everything fell into place and he processed everything she'd said in his motionless silence, all he could think about was getting to Lucy to help her understand that he would have been there for her. Hell, he would still be there for her if she'd let him, because he still loved her – like he always would – and he would do anything to make sure she was okay.

And right then, Bickslow knew she wasn't.

It was only then when his body remembered how to move did he finally scramble to his feet, and the five wooden dolls that his babies were in slowly raised themselves from where they had fallen and hovered in the air again. Except when he went to take a single step, the only thing on his mind being getting to Lucy, he fell back down to his knees and he fell forward onto his hands.

Everything was hitting him then, and it fucking hurt. He couldn't breathe again, and he could hear the blood rushing in his ears, and he could feel the way his own guilt was tearing him apart from the inside all over again.

He'd left her when she'd needed him the most, and right then, Bickslow just really had no idea what to do. He realised Lucy was gone, and he was sure he wouldn't be able to find her now. He'd sat there for far too long and he hadn't said a fucking thing. He had let her believe that he hated her for what had happened, and for that, Bickslow hated himself.

More than he had in a long, long time.

* * *

Bickslow gently kicked his apartment door closed behind him and he reached out to flick the lights on as he pulled his visor off before dropping it down to the ground. He was almost pleasantly surprised to find the lights working, having only been down to pay the bills he knew he needed to pay that same morning. After getting off the train in Magnolia again, he'd been everywhere apart from his own apartment. Until that moment, anyway.

Bickslow had been everywhere his feet would take him, just because he hadn't wanted to go home yet. Not that it was really home anymore anyway. He'd been to Lucy's apartment, only to find that she wasn't there, and he'd been to to the roof of the toy store just to sit and stare out at the town that had been rebuilt while he'd been gone. He'd been to the guild to see everyone working hard on getting it ready for the re-opening in just one week's time, and he'd been to the post office to pay his damn bills.

And then he'd gone back to his apartment, because he'd run out of places to go and ideas for where Lucy could have been. It hadn't even been a day, and she'd gone. She'd disappeared with her team before Bickslow had had a chance to talk to her.

He had no idea where she'd gone or if she was even coming back, and Bickslow could only blame himself for Lucy wanting to leave. She was so certain that he hated her for what had happened that she needed to get away, that she needed her space, but Bickslow only hated himself for that. He could only think that things would be different if he'd been able to open his goddamn mouth and tell her how wrong she was.

For once in her life, Lucy Heartfilia was wrong, and Bickslow couldn't tell her that, because she wasn't there. Because of him. And there just wasn't a single thing he could do about it.

He looked around his apartment with a pained look before turning and heading straight for the short hall and his bedroom. The bag he had over his shoulder fell to the floor by the door as he pushed it open, and he looked at everything in the dim room.

The made bed with the deep purple comforter, the black rug in the centre of the room, dark curtains, the dresser at the end of his bed and next to the door… Everything was the same as it was when he'd left it. Nothing had been touched, including the frame hanging above his bed with the two sheets of paper in them with the story and the letter she'd written more than a year before.

It was like his apartment was frozen in time, when things were happier and what was left of the world wasn't falling apart at his very feet. He made his way over to the window to pull the drapes open, only to sneeze when all of the dust settled in the fabric was disturbed and scattered around the room that hadn't been touched in so long. Bickslow turned then, his eyes taking in every single little thing in the room that made him feel like it was the year before and nothing had changed.

He could see the heavy book sitting on the nightstand, and his feet quickly had him crossing the short distance to sit down on the edge of the bed that Lucy had claimed as hers so long ago. His heart sank as he reached for the book, and his hand swiped over the black and red cover to clear the layer of dust that had settled on it. She had read the book cover-to-cover, and Bickslow remembered the last time he'd seen her reading it, just because she could.

It had been the day she'd gotten back from her last job; their last night together before everything had gone wrong. She'd been sitting up, as usual, reading through sections she'd already read. And Bickslow hadn't paid much attention to it, because she often did it and he was used to it. At the time, he hadn't paid much attention to just what part she was reading either, because when he'd asked her just why she was reading about the chances and possibilities of children being born with such magic, she had said she'd just been curious. And he'd left it at that, because at the time, he had had no idea that she'd actually been pregnant.

To think that at that point, one of the last truly happy moments they'd had together, he could have been happier. If he'd known that they'd been going to have a baby, then he would have been happy. Happier than he'd ever been in his entire life, for however of a brief moment it was.

He still didn't hate her or blame her for not telling him though. Not one tiny bit. It just hurt like hell to know how close things had been back then.

Carefully placing the book down on the nightstand, back where it had been left untouched, Bickslow slowly stood as he finally shrugged his cloak off and let it fall to the bed that was as equally covered in dust as everything else in his apartment. With the afternoon sun streaming in through the open curtains, Bickslow could see the tiny particles slowly floating down and settling on the surfaces the sun hit, and although he wasn't exactly a neat freak, he did enjoy things to be clean. It didn't help that he'd lived with Lucy for the better part of a year and she had a few habits regarding cleanliness and organisation that had worn off on him, but his apartment, though neat, was just beginning to irritate him. That, and dust had always made him sneeze a lot and all of it being disturbed in his room alone had it tickling his nose and making him more than uncomfortable.

He ignored that though, and did his best to squash the urge to just clean every surface and everything covered in dust, because it wasn't anywhere near as bad everything just hurt.

He went over the wardrobe then, and he only quickly pulled the doors open, half expecting to see empty hangers where Lucy kept a few things, but with a quick glance, he saw nothing was gone. That same navy blue dress she'd worn on their first date was hanging on the back of the door, just where she'd left it.

As his chest tightened, he quickly turned on his heels and went over to the dresser before he began to pull out the first few drawers, and seeing them filled with her things had Bickslow beginning to really have difficulty breathing.

The bathroom was just the same, as he'd expected, and before his eyes began to sting too much, the same way they did when his emotions went into flux and his control began to slip, Bickslow quickly turned again. He left the open drawers and doors behind him as he fled out into the short hall to the rest of his apartment, and only after slamming his bedroom door closed behind him did he slide down to the floor with his back against the end of the breakfast bar.

It wasn't supposed to be like that. None of her things were supposed to still be there. Her clothes, books, favourite soaps, lotions, shampoos. Hell, her damn fucking bright pink toothbrush. Nothing was supposed to be there, left untouched like he'd only been gone for a few days and Lucy would be coming back herself to spend the night like she usually did.

His apartment had been frozen in the time since the moment he'd locked the door behind him, and coming back just brought back every single memory, good and bad. And everything he'd left behind. It always came back to that. For Bickslow, it had constantly been about what he'd left, and everything in his apartment was a painful reminder of that. Bickslow couldn't bring himself to move from where he sat, not when he was surrounded by mementos from their life together.

He threw his head back into the counter and closed his eyes, letting out a shaky breath. He knew he needed to calm himself down, get everything under control as best he could and calm his heart's beating that drowned out everything else in his ears.

He didn't hear his apartment door open then, nor did he hear the two sets of heavy footsteps, followed by a lighter set come into his apartment and stop just in front of him. He was too busy trying to calm himself down, because right then, it was necessary. If he didn't get his emotions under control, he was sure to fall into an even darker and deeper pit of despair he was already in.

"Bickslow?"

His brow furrowed when he heard the familiar voice seep through past the deafening sound in his ears.

"Want your visor?" the same voice asked, and Bickslow could only shake his head when he recognised the usually gruff voice as belonging to Laxus. He probably needed his visor, but he didn't want it. Not in his own apartment. He hated wearing it there.

"Gimme a minute," Bickslow mumbled finally, swallowing to ease the dryness at the back of his throat. Just a minute or two. That was all he needed. Just enough time to let himself back down to make sure he was back in control and he wasn't going to hurt anyone because even then, Lucy was still the only person he trusted enough to have his eyes open when he was far from stable. And it was because Lucy trusted him not to hurt her.

But Lucy wasn't there. It was Laxus, and even though Bickslow knew that Evergreen and Freed had brought up their concern for him when it had come to his magic becoming more unstable than it had in a long time after leaving Magnolia in the letters to Laxus, he wasn't going to risk anything.

He only heard shuffling around him as he got everything slowly under control – his breathing, his heart rate, his eyes – and he silently began to wonder if it was really just Laxus, but when he heard a very high pitched sneeze, no doubt from all the dust in the room, he was sure it wasn't just Laxus.

"You good?" Laxus asked after a few silent moments, watching as the Seith mage dropped his head and run his hands down his face.

Bickslow nodded eventually. _Eyes are good, everything else, not so much._ "Yeah, I'm good," he mumbled as he slowly lifted his head again and pushed it into the counter again, letting his arms come to rest on his knees before he slowly opened his eyes. Bickslow blinked in confusion when he saw the three mages sitting down on the ground opposite him. Laxus had his back against the wall with one knee up, Gajeel sitting next to the blonde with his legs crossed, and Levy sitting on her knees just next to himself, each of them with looks of concerns on their faces. "What are you guys doing here?" he asked, sitting up ever so slightly in an attempt to give himself just that tiny bit more space in the cramped area between the end of his breakfast bar and the wall that his front door was on.

"Checking in on you," Laxus replied. It was the truth, and even though he wouldn't say the words out loud, he was worried about the Seith mage. Just as much as Gajeel and Levy were. It was really why they were there.

They weren't stupid; they knew where Lucy had gone the day before. And even if they hadn't known exactly why Lucy had suddenly run off from the guild, it had been pretty easy to figure out once she'd come back that same night an absolute mess, only to beg her team to take one of the few jobs the guild had started receiving with the reformation being widely known. They all knew exactly why she'd come back in such a state too. Laxus more than the others, just because he was the only one who knew just how much Lucy had wanted to tell Bickslow about the baby.

Bickslow didn't know that they knew though. He didn't know that anyone knew at all – not about the baby, not about what she had told him in Hargeon – and it was precisely why Bickslow was confused as to why he had people needing to check in on him. "I'm fine. You don't need to—"

"We know you saw Lucy," Gajeel cut him off, his own intense red eyes staring into Bickslow's. It wasn't the time to avoid the point, not when Bickslow would do everything he could to pretend he was truly fine if he believed no one else knew what had happened.

"So don't say you're fine, Bickslow," Levy said softly as she reached out a small hand to lay it over Bickslow's arm. "Because we know what happened."

… _What happened? Does that mean they know what happened in Hargeon? Or about the baby?_ "What?" Bickslow whispered as he looked up. His brow was furrowed as he slowly turned to Laxus, and seeing the unwavering certainty in the stormy eyes had Bickslow's pulse increasing steadily. "You knew?"

Laxus nodded once. "Wendy told us just after you left." Bickslow hadn't needed to say anything else for Laxus to know what he was asking.

Hearing the words had the Seith mage closing his eyes again and counting to three in his head. He was quickly losing himself again, and for the first time in the last few days – months, even – Bickslow wasn't mad at himself. Not really, then. No, he was mad at Laxus. His best friend – the one person he trusted the most aside from Lucy – had known about the baby before he had, and he hadn't even told him. So many opportunities to do so, and yet he'd kept silent.

Bickslow hated that Laxus had done that. It really wasn't about him not even knowing about his own child, because in a way, he could accept Lucy's reasoning for not telling him. It sucked, but he got it. It was about Laxus not telling him when he'd known for nearly a year. He felt betrayed, almost. Because Laxus knew better than anyone – just like team – how Bickslow had felt for that year. There hadn't been a single day where he'd actually been happy, or even close to it. He'd felt guilty the entire time, and Laxus had let him. He'd let him stay away when Bickslow knew he should have been with Lucy.

"You mean… You knew for an entire goddamn year… And you didn't tell me?" Bickslow asked, his voice soft but laced with venom as he narrowed his eyes at the blonde Dragon Slayer. "Did you just… forget to mention it? _'Oh, yeah, by the way, we're having a baby, and speaking of kids, your girlfriend had a miscarriage'_."

Laxus tried his best to keep his own emotions in check then, but his best friend had always had a habit of irritating him and it was incredibly difficult to do so, especially when he was placing the blame on him. And to Laxus, that just wasn't fair. "Bicks, you know that's not what it's like," he warned.

"No?" Bickslow suddenly shot up to his feet at Laxus did so, and he paced as the stoic Dragon Slayer held his ground. "What's it like then? Huh, Laxus?" he spat when he turned back around, his own arms folded as he slowly began to walk back and forth in front of his dining table. "Please. Explain it to me. Because I don't fucking understand why you didn't fucking tell me."

"It wasn't my place to do so," Laxus replied calmly, his eyes trained on the agitated Seith mage. And it wasn't his place to do so. As much as he wanted to go and find Bickslow after finding out from Wendy, just to shock some sense into him – much like Gajeel had wanted to – he knew he couldn't. Lucy hadn't told him because she hadn't wanted Bickslow to know, and Laxus wasn't going to blurt out a secret that he shouldn't have known in the first place, regardless of how he thought Bickslow should have always known.

"You should have told me, Laxus. It was my fucking kid and I deserved to know last fucking year, because you know I would have come right back if I'd known."

Laxus stepped up to the Seith mage with his own scowl. "You think I don't know that, Bicks?" he chided, his stormy blue eyes meeting the deep red that were surprisingly not as filled with anger as he'd expected. "We wanted to come and get you. Drag you back here by your fucking tongue if we had to."

"It's true, we did," Gajeel agreed quietly, only getting a quick glance from Bickslow.

"But we couldn't," Laxus continued. "Because Lucy didn't want you to know, because she didn't want you to be hurt and she didn't want you to hate her for it."

Bickslow suddenly stumbled backwards when he averted his gaze, when all of his anger towards Laxus for keeping it from him for so long was instantly replaced by that self-loathing. "I know…" he mumbled, only turning and leaning over his dust-covered counter on his elbows with his forehead resting on the cold surface. "I know she thinks I hate her for it…"

"But you don't."

"Of course I don't. I… I hate myself for it," he whispered, closing his eyes once again. "I should have… I should have stayed. I could have helped her if I'd known. If I'd known, I wouldn't have left and… and she wouldn't have had to deal with it alone…"

Laxus sighed with a roll of his eyes before he stepped forward again, and pulled the Seith mage up with a hand around his shoulder. "Alright, come 'ere," he mumbled, only pulling the tense man into a hug because he knew the guy needed one. Desperately. "Tell anyone I did this and I'll kill you."

If Bickslow had the ability to laugh then, he probably would have. Hell, if he could have questioned why Laxus was hugging him, he would have. But he couldn't. He just didn't have the energy to do so, if he told the truth. "I don't know how she could think I'd hate her for that…" he whispered sadly. "I could never hate her for anything. Least of all for that."

"Because she blames herself for it," Levy answered.

"I don't want her to though…" Bickslow didn't want Lucy to blame herself for it. She shouldn't feel guilty. And sure, he did kind of understand it a little bit, and he'd accepted that he would never understand just how she felt, but he still didn't want her to blame herself for what had happened. She had been through enough in such a short period of time that she didn't need the guilt of losing a baby weighing her down not when it wasn't her fault.

And Bickslow wanted to tell her all of that. He wanted to tell her she shouldn't hate herself and she shouldn't believe that he would hate her for it, but he couldn't. And that's what hurt. She hadn't given him a chance to do anything, and Bickslow could only think that he'd missed his chance to do so.

He turned then and ran a hand through his hair, letting out a shaky breath as he heavily sat down on his lounge. "I just… I want her to know—" He paused when the swirling dust in the room made him sneeze again and bite the tip of his tongue. "Damn it. Too much dust," he mumbled, only rubbing his nose with the back of his hand as he lightly shook his head before continuing with a numb tongue, "I want her to know that I don't hate her and that I still want to be there for her… But I can't, and it fucking hurts."

"Why can't you tell her?" Laxus asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Because she left," Bickslow said. "She didn't even give me a chance to do anything yesterday, and I know it was my fault because I was too fucking stupid to even open my goddamn mouth, but now I don't know where she is."

"Tell her when she gets back then."

Bickslow lifted his head when Levy sat down on the lounge next to him, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. "How do you even know she'll be back? She's probably gone because of me—"

"She went on a job," Laxus interrupted. "So don't blame yourself for her leaving. She just wanted her space, and she wanted to give you yours."

"But I don't need space. I need _her_."

"Then tell her that when she gets back," Levy said softly with a small smile. "She needs to hear that more than you think."

Bickslow nodded as he forced himself to smile for just a brief moment. He wanted to believe that Lucy would still need him, he really did, because he still needed her. He would always need her.

But he had to believe that she really would come back, whether it be in a few days or weeks. When she got back, he would tell her what he'd needed to the say the day before. Even if she didn't want to hear it, or she didn't believe it, he needed to say it, and he'd sure as hell do his best to make her believe it. She needed to hear it all as much as he needed to say it.

"Now," the Seith mage looked up when Laxus clapped his hands together with a scowl and walked around to his kitchen before opening up the cupboards under the sink. "I can deal with inhaling magical barrier particles, but I can't deal with breathing in dust," Laxus said matter-of-factly before he started pulling out every single cleaning product he could find.

Bickslow finally let out a weak chuckle then as he stood from the lounge and went back over to the counter. He'd never particularly enjoyed cleaning, but right then, he wanted to. And it wasn't entirely because he needed to, but he needed a distraction. He needed something to occupy his thoughts that were just trying to pull him under, because if he didn't, he was bound to hate himself even more than he already did, and no doubt start believing that Lucy hated him for leaving when he knew he should have stayed.

And if he let himself believe that Lucy truly hated him, then that was something he would never come back from.

* * *

For weeks, Bickslow sat in the guild after it finally got reopened, waiting each day for Lucy to come back. July ended and August rolled in, and the further into August it got, the more Bickslow hated himself. All he wanted was for Lucy to come back from whatever job she was out on with her team so he could go and talk to her, but the longer she was away, the more he began to think that she wasn't coming back.

The guild just wasn't the same without her or her team, and everyone knew it. Lucy had been the one to bring everyone together when they'd needed it, with everyone coming back from all corners of Fiore, and she hadn't been there to finally celebrate Fairy Tail being back.

For weeks, he sat with his team like he used to. He watched Laxus and Mira with Jax on the days that they brought him in. He watched Evergreen get all close and comfortable with Elfman again, and he watched Gajeel and Levy. Everyone around him was happy while he was miserable, but there was nothing anyone could do to cheer him up.

Freed had suggested going on a few jobs to help take his mind off Lucy, but Bickslow just didn't want to go. He wanted to be back when Lucy was, so going out on a job just wasn't an option.

Laxus had suggested cleaning his apartment again, but Bickslow couldn't do it again. He'd already taken to cleaning to help distract him – just another habit he'd picked up from Lucy – but he really couldn't clean the already close to spotless apartment again. It was bad enough he couldn't bring himself to touch or even move any of Lucy's things. Every drawer, every shelf, every cupboard that had anything of hers was left untouched.

But no matter how many distractions were offered to him, nothing really took his mind off Lucy. He could never really go very long without thinking of her as it was, but with her gone when there was so much he needed her to know, it was making his mind a very dark place.

All Bickslow could think about was the fact that things could have been very different if he'd known about the baby the year before. If he'd known, he wouldn't have left, because Lucy shouldn't have been alone. They should have dealt with it together because it was _their_ child, and still, Bickslow couldn't blame her. Or hate her. He just hated himself. He would never be able to forgive himself for leaving, even if he had thought it was the best thing to do at the time. He just needed Lucy to forgive him. If she could, that is, because Bickslow didn't think she would.

He could still hope though.

On this particular day though, Bickslow's mind was darker than usual, and people were wise to steer clear of him in the guild. If he could sulk in his own apartment, he would have, but there were still too many reminders of Lucy there. It was why he'd spent so much time in the guild over the weeks. He just couldn't face any of those reminders. And on this day, he definitely could not face them. Not when it was what would have been their two-year anniversary if they'd stayed together, and the day he'd been planning to propose on.

Everything just fucking hurt more than usual on that day, and Bickslow wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone at all.

But then Bickslow looked up from his dark corner when he heard the guild doors open and the unmistakable whining of a certain Dragon Slayer went out over the guild. His heart thumped in his chest when the rest of Lucy's team walked in through the doors, all covered in bandages and limping slightly as they bickered. Seeing them, Bickslow quickly got on his feet and pushed past everyone in his way to get out of the guild, the ends of his cloak billowing behind him as he left everyone and everything else behind. He didn't care about anything but Lucy then, and more than anything, he hoped that it meant she was back.

* * *

Bickslow looked to the blonde sleeping peacefully on the bed just in front of him, completely unaware of his presence as he sat down on the chair at her desk. He looked to the bandages he could see – one around the middle of her thigh, another just above her wrist, and a larger one around her abdomen that was peeking out from the bottom of her shirt – and his heart sank just a little from seeing her in such a state. Bickslow had never liked seeing Lucy with injuries, no matter how big or small, because it had always put him in pain to know that she was in pain. And right then, it hurt more than it ever had.

He knew she would be fine though. She'd had Wendy tending to the slightly more major injuries she received on her job, the worst being a deep cut across her hip, and Bickslow believed in Wendy. But still, Bickslow couldn't bring himself to leave then. Part of him said it wasn't really right for him to be there when she was asleep, but the part of him that wanted to actually make sure she was okay won out. It didn't entirely help that he was worried she'd run off again once she did wake up in a few hours, because Bickslow couldn't help but believe she had done it to avoid him. No matter what everyone else told him.

As he leant forward to rest his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands, he stopped suddenly and looked towards the corner of her desk from the corner of his eyes. All of her jewellery that she'd apparently been wearing had been taken off, and he hadn't taken much notice to it all until then. He saw the same necklace he'd given her for Christmas, the first time he'd actually told her that he loved her, and he saw the charm bracelet from her 19th birthday. They weren't what intrigued him the most though. It was the other necklace with the ring on it that did that, and it had his heart actually stopping as he slowly lifted a hand to pull it towards him.

Bickslow had never expected to see that ring again. Hell, he hadn't expected Lucy to keep it either, but she did, and she'd worn it around her goddamn neck. Not that Bickslow was complaining. He had said she could do whatever she wanted with it, since it was hers, but he'd be lying if he said it wasn't just a little endearing to know she'd kept it.

He lifted up the chain then as he sat back in the chair, and he let the ring fall to the bottom of it as he idly began to swing it as he wrapped it around his fingers. His eyes flicked back to Lucy as she shifted on the bed, a quiet sigh escaping her lips as she remained asleep. As he looked back and forth between the blonde and the ring, he couldn't help but wonder if they could make things work again. Because god, was that all he wanted. If he had the opportunity to be with Lucy again, he would. In a heartbeat, he would take it because she was the only person and thing in the entire world who could make him happy.

For so long, Bickslow had thought he actually had been happy, but it had only taken Lucy coming into his life for him to realise that he hadn't been. There had always been something missing from his life, and he hadn't known that until Lucy had made him feel complete. And still, he'd never quite gotten over the fact that it was Lucy Heartfilia of all people that he would love and cherish more than any other thing or person in the entire world. It had always almost felt too good to be true to have Lucy in his life, but he'd never really taken it for granted. No, he'd been thankful for every single day he'd spent with her, and she'd always known that. But… There was a growing part of Bickslow that wanted all of that back.

He wanted Lucy back.

Bickslow had accepted that Lucy was gone from his life forever, because he'd left in the hopes that it was the right thing to do. He'd accepted that he was never going to see her again, and part of him had accepted that she would no doubt hate him for as long as she lived for what he'd done.

But right then, as he sat there, looking between the ring he should have proposed with exactly a year earlier, and the woman he should have proposed to, he wasn't accepting any of that.

She had said she loved him when they'd finally seen each other again after so many months, and she had said that he would always make her happy. But until that very moment, Bickslow had forgotten that. He'd forgotten what was suddenly the most important part of what she'd said that day, because he was too busy focusing on her thinking that he hated her. He had been too preoccupied with trying to figure out how Lucy thought it was even possible for him to hate her that he overlooked what was truly important.

If Lucy could forgive Bickslow for leaving when he was sure she needed him, then Bickslow didn't know if there was a reason that they couldn't work things out, and it had his heart warming his entire body from the inside with the possibility of it.

They'd been through hell and back together in the relatively short time (compared to what he'd originally hoped as the rest of their lives) together, and no matter what they went through, they always managed to come out on the other side just that little bit stronger.

From the first time they almost broke up when Bickslow's guilt got the better of him, to the second time they had when they'd both been too stupid to just tell each other how they felt. From Bickslow almost dying twice, to watching Lucy be tortured before his very eyes. Every time they'd gone through something terrible, they'd bounced back and everything worked out, because when they had each other, there was nothing in the entire world they couldn't face.

And to Bickslow, losing the baby was just another one of those terrible things. And sure, it really fucking sucked that it had happened, and Bickslow knew that there was already a part of him that would always remember it and he would always miss the child that could have been, but he was sure things could get better for both of them if they were together again. He truly wanted to believe that.

He wanted to believe that being apart for the better part of a year was just another thing they could put behind them, because he wanted to go back to the days where he was happy. He wanted to go back to the days where he knew Lucy was happy. He wanted to go back to the days where they were happy together and that was all that mattered.

If Lucy loved him, Bickslow desperately hoped that she could forgive him for what he'd done. If Lucy could forgive him, and he could convince her he didn't hate her, then maybe, just maybe, things could work out again. Because he was done with being miserable.

So when Lucy began to wake up just a few hours later, the sun beginning to set through her open window, Bickslow sat forward on the chair again as he gently lowered the silver chain with the diamond ring on it back to the desk. His breath caught slightly when her eyes slowly fluttered open and she smiled softly at him for a brief moment before she rubbed at her eyes.

"Hi," she whispered. She hadn't been able to help smiling when she saw him sitting on the chair at the end of her bed, just because it had been a surprise. She hadn't expected Bickslow to even want to be anywhere near her after what she'd told him, and she'd be lying if she said it still didn't hurt and she was trying to get over all of the guilt and self-loathing that had come back up.

"Hey," Bickslow said with his own soft smile. "How are you feeling?"

 _Is he just here to check up on me…?_ "I've been better," she admitted as she did her best to sit up on the bed, though the sharp pain across her hip had her face turning into a grimace of pain as she did so. Bickslow could only shift forward ever so slightly on the chair when he saw the pain she was in. "So um… What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you. I need to talk to you, actually."

"Oh…" The small bit of happiness she'd had from just being around Bickslow had quickly faded hearing the words, because she was sure she knew what it was about. And Lucy had expected them to have an actual conversation of sorts about it, especially with the way she'd left things when she'd run off.

All Lucy had been able to think about when she'd been on her job with her team was that she shouldn't have left. She should have given Bickslow a chance to say something – anything – and at least waited for him to process it all. She knew it was a lot to take in, but she'd left Bickslow to deal with it on her own. And that just wasn't fair. She'd left Bickslow to deal with something that undoubtedly hurt him too, just because it was his child too, and she hated herself just that little bit more for that.

"It's okay… We don't have to talk about it…" she whispered as she looked down at her hands. In truth, she didn't want to talk about, even though she'd seen it coming. She didn't want to hear Bickslow say that he blamed her.

"No, we do have to talk about." Bickslow got up from the chair then and quickly took the few steps to sit down on the edge of the bed. He gently took Lucy's face in his hands when she didn't look back up, and seeing the tears in her eyes had what was left of his heart breaking. "I don't hate you, okay?" he said softly. "I love you, and I always will."

"B-But… I l-lost our b-baby… How can you not h-hate me?"

"Like I said, I love you, Cosplayer," he whispered, his thumbs wiping her tears away as they rolled down her cheeks. "Even if it was possible for me to hate you for anything, it would never be for something like that. I'm not going to hate you for something that wasn't your fault."

She let out a strangled sob as her heart thudded painfully in her chest. All Lucy wanted to do was bury her head against Bickslow's chest and cry until she could cry no more, but her self-hatred was stopping her. She couldn't see how Bickslow could still love her, not when she truly blamed herself again. She was back at the spot she was in a year before like the last year hadn't happened at all. All of the healing and acceptance was just worthless then, because telling Bickslow had just brought it all back to the surface.

"It w-was my fault t-though…" she spluttered. She knew deep down it wasn't, and she'd accepted that there wasn't anything she could have done, but right then, that's just how she felt. She truly did blame herself. "I-I couldn't protect our baby… O-Or k-keep it s-safe…"

"Lucy, please. Stop blaming yourself," Bickslow pleaded, gently forcing her head back up when she looked down again so she could meet his eyes. "It wasn't your fault. These kind of things just happen sometimes. They suck, and they hurt like hell, but it happens. And I think you know that. I think you know that there was nothing you could have done and it wasn't your fault it happened," He paused when Lucy shrugged slightly. "But it still hurts, and I know that."

"I'm s-sorry… I never w-wanted you to get h-hurt." Because if anything, it hurt Lucy more to know that she'd hurt Bickslow.

He shifted on the bed to bring on knee up, turning so he was facing Lucy completely. "Don't be sorry. You have nothing to be sorry for," he said softly.

"Y-Yes I do…"

"No, you don't," Bickslow insisted. "I'm the one that should be sorry." He dropped his hands from her face to loosely hold her hands within his own, and he stared down at them. The way Lucy was looking at him like she had no idea what he was talking about hurt way too much. "I'm sorry that you had to go through all of that on your own," he finally whispered.

Lucy blinked in confusion as she looked down to their joined hands.

He sighed before forcing himself to look back up, his eyes meeting Lucy's once again as he lifted one hand to cup her cheek and idly wipe her tears away again. "I'm not even going to pretend to completely understand how you felt – or feel now, even – because I don't think I ever will. I just wish you hadn't gone through all of it on your own, because it was something we should have dealt with and been through together."

"But I couldn't t-tell you…" she whispered. "I w-wanted to… B-But I was s-scared you would hate me." She turned her head away to duck her eyes when that guilt over keeping it a secret for so long crept up and took a hold of her.

"I know, and I know that you didn't want me to know because you didn't want to hurt me and you didn't want me to hate you, but none of that matters to me. I understand why you didn't tell me, but I just wish you'd have told me," he said almost desperately. "You shouldn't have had to go through that on your own."

"Are you… Are y-you mad at me?"

Bickslow shook his head with a soft and pained smile. "Of course I'm not. I'm mad at myself for not being there when I should have been. That's what hurts the most to me. You shouldn't have been alone when you were in pain, and I'm never going to be able to forgive myself for leaving then."

Lucy looked up in shock then, and she shook her head frantically, only pushing her cheek into Bickslow's hand even more as her own hand wrapped around his wrist. She didn't want Bickslow to be blaming himself for that. It was one of the last things she had wanted, and it was one of the things she had been worried about the most when she had thought about telling him after all that time. "P-Please don't be mad at y-yourself," she pleaded. "Y-You didn't know… It w-was my f-fault a-and you only d-did what you thought w-was right."

"But I still should have been here with you. I should have stayed to make sure you were okay. I should have… I should have tried harder instead of just assuming there was nothing else I cou—"

He was silenced by Lucy's finger on his lips, and he could only blink and watch in silence as she slowly and painfully moved to sit up on her knees, the fronts of her legs pressed up against Bickslow's. She took a quiet breath to try and get herself together then before she quietly said, "There was nothing else y-you could have done b-because I w-wouldn't have let you. I wanted to deal with i-it on my own, b-because I thought I w-was protecting you." And it was the truth. If Bickslow had stayed, he would have no doubt begun to hate himself even more the longer he watched her close herself off from the world.

The only way things would have been different would have been if she had told him about the baby then, a year ago, and _let_ him know that pain. Lucy knew very well that it would have been a hell of a lot easier to accept and come to terms with if they'd dealt with it and mourned together, but she was so set on keeping Bickslow from knowing the pain of losing a child that she had kept it to herself. Lucy had seen Bickslow go through enough and experience enough pain in just the year they'd been together that she never wanted to see him hurt again. Ever.

And it really fucking sucked telling Bickslow about it at all, but it really did have to be done and in a way, she really was glad that he knew. He'd always deserved to know, because it had been his child too and every parent should have the right to know about their own child and mourn, unborn or not. Lucy knew that. Truly.

But if there was one thing Lucy couldn't put up with right then, it was Bickslow not being able to forgive himself for doing what he had wholeheartedly believed as being the right thing. Because Lucy knew it had been the right thing. It hurt like hell to be apart from him, and there really hadn't been a single day where she hadn't thought about how much she missed him and how much she wished she could tell him that she loved him, but Bickslow leaving had been the right thing back then, as painful as it had been to admit that to herself all those months ago.

Without Bickslow leaving, she wouldn't have found the courage and strength to leave her home behind. Even if it hadn't been permanently. She had needed to get away, to temporarily put everything that had happened and everyone and everything she'd lost behind her, and if Bickslow hadn't left, she wouldn't have been able to do that. He had been the one thing keeping her tethered at the time, and Bickslow had known that. Without Bickslow taking that bold and brave step back, Lucy didn't think she would have smiled or even laughed at all in the last several months. She had needed to get away so she could come back when she was actually ready to face everything. She had needed time, and Bickslow had given her that.

But… All of that being said, and however thankful she was that Bickslow had been able to do that for her, no matter how painful it had been for either of them, she wasn't interested in what had happened in the last several months. Not anymore, anyway. She was home, and coming home and finally seeing Bickslow had her realising that she really did need Bickslow back in her life for her to truly be home. And she'd known that for a long time. But now… Now it was something more.

When she finally moved her finger away from Bickslow's lips, only lifting both of her hands to loosely lace at the back of his neck and in the nape of his hair, Bickslow softly said, "I need to know that you can forgive me for leaving."

"I have n-nothing to forgive you for."

He closed his eyes with a quiet sigh. "Does that mean you do?"

"Of course i-it does," she whispered, leaning forward to rest her forehead on his.

Bickslow so desperately wanted to wrap his arms around her and pull her to him and hold her close then, but he couldn't. Not when he was scared of hurting her. Instead, he had to settle with lightly having his hands rest on her waist, only barely feeling the edges of the bandages through the think fabric of her shirt.

For the first time in a very long time, Bickslow really did feel close to happiness then. He didn't understand how Lucy could forgive him for leaving, but then again there were plenty of things he still didn't understand.

But that hope that they could work things out was stronger than it had been before. He needed Lucy back in his life, that much was for certain. Nothing seemed right with Lucy. Everything was incomplete, like his life had been before her. And he was sick of that feeling. He couldn't handle that anymore.

With everything around them slowly going back to the way things had been – to the way things should have always been – Bickslow needed just one more thing to make everything feel normal again. He needed Lucy. It was never just about wanting Lucy, because god, did he, but it really was about needing her.

His heart began to thump in his chest once again when the thought of things being the way they should have always been centred in his mind. There were so many things that should have been, and Bickslow had been so sure that none of those would ever come to happen. The life with Lucy he'd walked away from – for her – held all of those, and right then, Bickslow wanted them all. A lot.

And Bickslow still wasn't sure if they were just things he would constantly wish for, or if they were things that could and would actually happen. He needed to know though. More than anything, though, he needed to know if they could actually make things work again.

The only problem was that he was nervous. He was rarely nervous, but right then, he'd never been more so in his entire life, and he had very good reason to be.

He opened his eyes then, and seeing the soft smile on Lucy's lips and the glimmer of actual happiness in her chocolate eyes had Bickslow's nerves calming just a little bit. She loved him. He knew that. He'd always known and he would always know that, and right then, that was what had Bickslow saying the words he should have said the year before.

"Marry me."

* * *

 **So... Yeah... That happened. It's another cliffhanger (did you expect anything less from me?), but it's a good cliffhanger. Right? I mean... Come on... You know where this is going... Or maybe she'll say no? Hmm. Who knows? Muahahah.**

 **Anyway. I hope you guys liked this chapter! Ah, it was fun and painful to write. Seriously... It was hard to write because these two are killing me, but all of it needed to be done.**

 **Please remember to Review/Favourite/Follow if you did enjoy it! You know I love you guys.**

 **And as usual, until next time (which, at this point, I have no idea when it will be because I have no idea what story I'll work on next... Probably Shattered, to be honest).**

 **\- April**


	44. Chapter 44

**Wow, okay so... Yeah, at least half of this chapter is lemon... Or... Well, something that's supposed to be close to that. I'm still not sure what I'm doing, but, I'm also way too self-critical and a compulsive apologiser, so I will apologise in advance for something I am still trying to figure out how to write.**

* * *

"What did you just say?" Lucy whispered as her eyes suddenly flew open again, her heart hammering in her chest. Her thumbs brushing back and forth across his cheekbones stopped and she sat back slightly, just to stare at Bickslow in complete astonishment. She was sure she'd actually heard the words that had come out of his mouth, but still, she couldn't help but ask.

Bickslow quickly cleared his throat and looked down for just a moment before he looked back up to Lucy to hold her gaze, and the corner of his mouth lifted up into a small smile as a nervous laugh slipped out. "I, uh… I said… Marry me. W-Well, I mean… I probably should have asked if you wanted to make things work again—"

"Yes."

He had quickly realised that starting with an entire proposal really wasn't the best idea. But… It had felt right, and even then, it still did. Asking the woman of his dreams to marry him, and _then_ see if she wanted to try things again was probably not the best order to do things. He felt his heart sinking under his own negative thoughts. He nodded once before he flicked his eyes elsewhere, and mumbled, "Yeah, sorry. Probably wasn't a good idea to start with an enti—"

Lucy's lips on his suddenly cut him off and the brightest smile he had ever seen on her face had Bickslow's heart completely stopping for at least a few seconds when she pulled away. Just in that moment, she left him completely speechless and breathless, and it was just from her smile alone. Lucy was sure she was going to burst into tears any moment, but they would be because she was truly the happiest she had been in a very, very long time.

She smiled at Bickslow for just a moment for she finally opened her mouth to actually talk. "Yes," Lucy whispered again. "I'll marry you. A million times yes." She didn't need to think about it at all. She'd heard the words. Bickslow had asked her to marry him, and she would gladly do so.

For so long, she had been waiting to hear and say those words, and she couldn't even describe how much joy she felt just from finally being able to do so. She had promised Bickslow that she would say yes when he asked, but the fact she never broke a promise wasn't what had her saying it then. No, it was because he was the love of her life; the only person she would ever love like that, and she couldn't think of a better way to spend her life than with him.

She'd had her time away. She'd had her year and she had lived the life she thought she could truly want – or at least could cope with. She'd thought she was starting the next part of her life, but she hadn't been. She'd been taking a break; it was her interlude. That's all it had been and it was all it would ever be. Because now? Now she was going to be starting the next part of her life like she had always dreamed about. It was always supposed to have been with Bickslow, and nothing would ever change that. He was her happy ending, and she wanted that.

And she knew she was going to get it too, because no matter what, she would always be happiest with Bickslow.

It didn't matter to Lucy that it was the second time in essentially a year that she'd seen the man and they hadn't even talked about the possibility of even getting back together and going back to the way things had been before everything fell apart. They didn't need to talk about it at all, really, because they both knew that they would have made sure things could go back to the way they were. No matter what, it would always come down to them needing each other be truly happy, and being right in front of each other right then just wasn't enough.

They needed to actually be with each other, and they both knew it. They didn't need to really talk about it, because no matter what, they could always find a way to work through things. And it was always _together_. Being apart for a year was just something else they would work through. They would put it behind them and come out on the other side stronger than they were before. That's just how they were, and it was how they had always been.

Together, they could get through anything. It was the way things should have always been, and Lucy was sure as hell glad that it was the way things were going to be again.

"Are you… Are you sure?" Bickslow asked quietly, only looking at her hopefully as his heart pounded a jagged rhythm in his chest. Deep down, he knew that she meant it, but he really did have to make sure. It had been an incredibly long time after all, and if Lucy wanted to take things slow – work back up to that point, maybe – then he really would have no issues with that. Not ever.

Lucy nodded quickly. "I've never been so sure of anything in my entire life." And Lucy meant that wholeheartedly. For more than a year, Lucy had known what her answer would have been, and no amount of time would ever change that and how sure she was about it. Not ever. She loved him with all of her being and that was never going to change. Quickly, Lucy leant forward once again as she sat up on her knees, and she wound her arms around Bickslow's neck and let herself be pulled into the slow kiss.

Everything felt almost too surreal to be anything other than a dream. It was too perfect, being in one another's arms once again after being apart for so long, being together. Already, everything was falling back into place and returning to the way things had always supposed to have been. A time where everything was truly perfect and there was nothing in the entire world that could ever make it anything but that. Not for long, anyway.

With each other, everything was perfect and everything would always be perfect. And Lucy had missed that feeling just as much as Bickslow had. Everything was just as it should be and the pieces were all falling into place. For the first time in more than a year, they both felt like they were truly home. That last something that had been missing to really make it feel like they were home, was each other. And right then, they had that. They would always have that.

Bickslow slowly leant back on the bed, and he smiled up at Lucy with nothing but complete adoration and love for the woman that he was finally going to be able to spend the rest of his life with. "I love you so much," he said softly as he lifted a hand from her waist to cup her cheek. "More than anything in the entire world."

"I know, Bicks," she whispered. "And if I didn't love you as much as I do, then I wouldn't have just agreed to marrying your ass." She lifted her head to look towards her desk just at the end of her bed, and seeing the silver chain with the diamond ring just on the corner of it, she smiled down at Bickslow once again before sliding herself forward and stretching her arm out, just so she could get her fingers around the chain to pull it towards her. She sat up again once she had it in her hands, her legs on either side of Bickslow's surprisingly narrow waist, and she looked down to Bickslow once again when he sat up on one elbow and gently pried the chain from her hands. "You know," she began, watching as he turned the chain to get to the clasp. "I cried when you sent me that. Like, a lot. And I really wanted to hate you for it, but I couldn't."

Bickslow kept his eyes down as he slid the ring from the chain and into his hand. "I didn't mean to upset you. I knew it was stupid though. I really shouldn't have sent you it." At the time, he'd only really been a little aware of how stupid it was. It was only after his team and Laxus had found out that he really did regret it, because it was just unfair, if anything.

"I wanted to hate you because my first thought was that it was unfair. Because I missed you and it made me miss you even more. Every day, I thought about you, because I didn't know what you were doing, or if you were safe or if you were okay…" Lucy held out her left hand in front of Bickslow when he looked up again, and when he slowly slipped the ring onto her finger, she had to stop herself from bursting into either tears or laughter - she honestly wasn't sure which though, but both would be from sheer joy. She knew that much. She might have put it on her finger once or twice in the last few weeks or so just to see what it would have looked like on her hand and not around her neck, so it wasn't a surprise that it fit perfectly. She already knew it did.

As she lifted her hand back up slowly just to admire it with a never-fading smile, one that matched Bickslow's, she said, "I couldn't hate you because I knew you were okay, and that was all that mattered to me. Everyone else I could keep track of for the most part, but you, and Ever and Freed… There was nothing. Ever. So I was always worried about you. But… I was happy. I was happy to know that you were okay, and do you know what else I thought when I saw this ring?"

"That I would have probably deserved getting turned to stone and trapped in runes? Which, I did, by the way. It was a very fun few days."

Lucy laughed as she shook her head slightly, and Bickslow's breath almost caught. It had been such a long time since he'd heard that sound, apart from that time where he was sure he had imagined it. Still, to that day, it was one of his favourite sounds in the entire world and it always would be. "No, but I'm not going to say that you didn't deserve that, because really, it was kind of a dick move to send your ex-girlfriend the engagement ring you had obviously planned on using at some point," she scolded, although playfully at that.

"A year ago," Bickslow said with a wide grin as he turned slightly to lean back on both elbows instead.

A perfectly shaped eyebrow rose on Lucy's face as she sat up slightly. "Huh?"

"A year ago." Bickslow shrugged. "Some point. It was going to be a year ago. To the day." He didn't see the harm in telling her, not when she was officially his fiancée, and oh, did Bickslow fucking love that. He was sure he was going to love her being his wife a whole lot more though, and it was a great feeling for Bickslow to know that she would be. Soon.

"Today?" she whispered to herself, trying to figure out why that day would have been so special. Having been out on that job for so long, Lucy hadn't paid much attention to the date. But then she realised, and she felt the first tear skate down her cheek. "It's the 25th, isn't it?" Bickslow nodded, and she quickly leant forward to pepper his face with kisses, from his forehead to his cheeks, down the mark across his nose and to the wide grin plastered on his lips as he quietly began to laugh. Just… _Everywhere_. "God, I love you," she choked out as more tears slid silently down her face.

"That's why you're marrying me, isn't it?" he chuckled.

Lucy sat up again as she let out a watery laugh. Keeping her hands on his face, she said, "W-Well, yeah. Of course it is. Because I want to spend the rest of my life with you and I always did. But… The date. God, I just… I love that it's today, and I really, _really_ want to be saying 'I do' this time next year. On this exact day."

Bickslow moved to be resting on just one elbow again, and he lifted his free hand just to cover Lucy's left to bring it down slightly, just to smile down at the sight of the ring sitting perfectly on her finger. Where it should have always been. "If that's when you want to do it, then that's when we'll do it," he smiled as he looked back up, and as it turned just slightly mischievous, he added, "But I'm not going to be saying 'I do'…"

"And what exactly are you going to be saying instead?"

" _'Hell fucking yes_ , I do' is what I'm going to be saying."

Lucy shook her head as another bubbly laugh slipped out of her. "You will _not_ be saying that on our wedding day."

"Yeah, I will be." And oh, would he. Nothing was going to stop him from saying that. Not even Lucy would be able to stop him from saying that, because to Bickslow, 'I do' just didn't cut it. Those two words didn't hope enough power in them to express how happy he was and would be when he finally got to call Lucy his wife. As she rolled her eyes at him, he laughed and pulled her down when he leant back again. "But, I believe we got off topic," Bickslow said as he gently rolled them over to rest on their sides with his arms around her and holding her close, making sure that Lucy wasn't on the side with the bandages around her thigh and hip. "What was it you thought when you saw the ring?"

"That I would have said yes if you'd asked me to marry you in the letter," she whispered. "And that it really is beautiful, and I love it."

"If only I'd known," he chuckled. "But I'm glad you like it. I wanted to get the perfect ring for the perfect girl." Bickslow smiled against her lips before he sighed and moved forward just to rest his forehead against hers, and he closed his eyes. "I missed this. A lot."

Just being with Lucy was what Bickslow had missed. Seeing her smile, hearing her laugh. Being able to hold her. Bickslow would never get sick of her. Not even in a million years, and if he really could spend a million years with her, he would. Gladly. Hell, if it was possible to become fucking immortal, he would. Being able to spend all eternity by her side would be a great way to spend forever.

And it warmed Bickslow to his very soul to know that he really would be able to spend the rest of his life with her. The woman of his dreams, love of his life, and hopefully one day, the mother of his children. But if Lucy didn't want to go down that road after what had happened, then that would be fine. As long as he was just with her, Bickslow really didn't care all that much. Not really, anyway.

"Me too," Lucy sighed. "But… Do you know what else I missed?" Slowly, an almost sinfully sweet smirk tugged at her lips, and Bickslow opened her eyes to look at her again.

She hooked a leg over his hip to force him onto his back again, ignoring the slight pain from doing so. Her hands slowly moved up over the thick fabric of his pinstriped shirt, and up to the clasp of his cloak. Bickslow glanced down to see her undoing it just as slowly, and he could only raise an eyebrow as he looked back up to see her lust filled eyes looking back at him. "What's that?" he asked, the corners of his mouth lifting up into a wicked grin.

"Really, really, _really_ great sex."

"Oh god, I completely second that," Bickslow groaned. Bickslow had had a lot of sex, just because he'd slept with a lot of people. He'd truly had more bad sex that he cared to admit. But he'd also had a lot of great sex. Like, a lot. Amazing sex, really. But with Lucy? It was on a whole different level. Every. Single. Time. Great didn't do it justice. Neither did amazing.

Mind-blowing. Fantastic. Incredible. Abso-fucking-lutely sensational. Or at least those were the only words Bickslow could ever come up with, not that he was sure the proper words even existed. But had he missed it? Yeah, he'd fucking missed it. He'd missed it a lot. More than he should have, anyway. He knew that much.

Bickslow sat up slightly, just to let Lucy's nimble fingers pull his shirt free from the metal waist guard before pushing both layers up and over his head. He caught her hands in his when they reached around for the clasp at the back of the metal belt holding the four-piece fabric up, and she looked back up at him in confusion, wondering just why he had stopped her. Bickslow grinned again then, and quickly leant forward just too quickly press his lips to hers. "It's not that I don't want to, because I really, really do…" He brought her hands back around to be between them and then said softly, "I just mean that you're kind of covered in bandages and all, and you know, this can wait."

Lucy smiled back at him almost innocently as she freed her hands. "Do you really think a few cuts and bruises are going to stop me from fucking my _fiancé_?"

She was almost convinced there was nothing that could stop her from doing just that. Not even any amount of pain would, and even then, it didn't matter. Not when it would become nothing compared to the pleasure she knew would almost overwhelm her. Nothing else mattered when they were together.

Bickslow almost whimpered at her words though. He loved that part of her. He had always loved that part of her, and right then, he was more than glad that he had her all to himself once again. He shrugged, and as his hands went back to her waist to begin to lift up her shirt, he said, "Well, if that's the case… This can definitely not wait."

Quickly, Bickslow had the blonde on her back beneath him, tossing her shirt to some part of the room along with her bra before diving back down to feel her bare chest against his as his tongue roughly pushed past her lips. By that point already, Bickslow was sure as hell it wasn't going to as be as long as he wished for. He needed her, like he always had and always would, but right then, he just needed to be _in_ her. It'd been far too long since he'd felt her come apart around him and because of him, and the urge to feel it again as she screamed his name had him quickly tearing his mouth away from hers and sliding down some.

As much as he wanted to admire the porcelain beauty beneath him, he just didn't have the time to do so. Not right then, anyway. He was far too impatient. He had all the time in the world to do that after, and that's what Bickslow reminded himself with when he wanted to tell himself to just slow the hell down. Not that Lucy minded, of course. She just didn't give a damn, because the sooner he was inside her and she had her legs wrapped around his waist, the better.

Her back arched from the mattress as his lips surrounded a nipple, and a gasp-turned-moan left her own lips as he pulled it between his teeth. Just a few small touches – not even that, really – and Lucy was quickly losing her cool. Any other time and she really wouldn't have cared how quickly he was having her on the verge of begging him to make love to her. But right then, she cared. A lot. Even just the seconds felt too slow to Lucy.

But as always, for reasons neither had ever figured out, Bickslow seemed to hear her silent pleas. And when he lifted his head again, only hooking his fingers into the waistbands of the last remaining articles of clothing she had on, he saw the look in her eyes that sent him to his knees every fucking time he saw it. That silent pleading and sultry look in her chocolate eyes had Bickslow feeling a whole lot better about feeling so damn impatient and that sense of urgency within him was just a little less annoying. Just because he knew that what he could give her was what she desperately wanted.

And oh, would he give her that. He sat up just enough to finally slide her shorts and underwear down her silken legs, and carefully over the bandages wrapped around her thigh. Like the rest of her clothes, it really didn't matter where they landed on the floor, just as long as they were off her.

All Bickslow wanted to do was dive down between her legs and taste her. And oh, was it tempting. Far too tempting and way too inviting, but he could do that later. As much as Lucy would love to remember what it felt like to come undone from just his mouth and his tongue alone, it was not what she wanted. Not right then. She needed something else, and she was quickly growing more impatient with each passing moment. "Bicks," she almost whined, looking up once again with unbridled longing in her eyes. "You're still wearing too many clothes."

And he was. Far too many, and way more than either would have liked. Bickslow looked down at himself as he sat up from her, and he quickly pulled himself away from the near magnetising blonde and to his feet just to begin pulling off the rest of his own clothes. "Jesus, fuck. Why the fuck do I wear so many goddamn layers?" he muttered to himself more than Lucy. It was far quicker for him to do it himself rather than have Lucy strip him, as much as they both probably really wanted her to do. It was far more fun that way.

Right then though, it really wasn't about it being fun. Not really, anyway, but that didn't mean it wasn't. "I've been asking myself that same question for far too long," Lucy laughed breathlessly as she sat up on her knees on the edge of the bed. Her fingertips lightly trailed across the hard planes of his stomach, his sides, only barely tracing across the tattoo she realised she really loved, and the scars she loved just as much.

He quickly pulled off the last of his far too inconvenient (especially in that moment) clothes, leaving them on the ground by her bed. Before Lucy could even look back up, Bickslow's arm wound around her waist to pin her to him. His mouth slanted over hers and drowned out the slight hum of pleasure that came from her. Slowly, he pushed her back down onto the bed, their lips and tongues still moving together.

Her eyes shot open just as she pulled Bickslow's lip between her teeth, just to see the dark grin somehow on his face right before her and the untempered mischief in his dark eyes. "Now is not the time to tease me, Bickslow," she warned, stifling the moan that yearned to escape as she felt the tip of his cock only brush against her dripping folds. She didn't need that. She could deal with the teasing any other time, but then? She most definitely could not.

"No?" he asked, only guiding himself down to barely press against her entrance. He couldn't tease her as much as he wanted to, but… He could a little bit. He couldn't help himself, even if it was taking all the self-control he had just to stop himself from snapping his hips forward to bury himself completely within her core.

Lucy's legs wound around his waist as he pulled her to the edge, all while only slowly pressing into her just that little bit more. Just enough to really have her on the verge of begging, and he knew it. "No." She barely managed to get it out before he quickly pushed into her, and her head went back into the mattress as a long moan barrelled out of her. "O-Oh… God… Fuck," she moaned as he began a relentless pace, exactly like she needed.

He'd always been able to know what she needed, and right then was no different. She needed to feel him stretching her, filling her completely, making it so she wouldn't be able to walk the next goddamn day. But what did Bickslow need? He just needed _her_. To feel her come apart around him – because of him – and to hear her scream and moan like she used to.

And like she was. As always. The sounds of her screams of pleasure drowned out his own as her sex pulled her in deeper each time, but he wouldn't drown out hers. Never. Not even when he probably should have, because he'd just never cared who heard her. Or heard them, really. Because every time they were together and joined like that, the world fell away. Hell, it was like they were just in the middle of a void or something, because when it came to Lucy, Bickslow had a serious case of tunnel vision.

Everything always just faded away, and right then all Lucy could think about as she forced herself to sit up on her elbows and open her eyes, was how he always managed to hit every single sweet spot inside of her that had her unable to stay quiet, even if her life depended on it. She knew Bickslow didn't mind how loud she was, and neither did she. But oh, to have someone – the one person in the entire world, she was convinced – who could make her scream like that back in her life, and for good, was an amazing feeling. That wasn't what mattered the most however. The fact that Bickslow was the only person who could make her feel that way – and she really was certain that he was – was truly just a bonus.

There had always been a lot more to him that his reputation. Granted, he really did live up to it, and he really was as skilled with his tongue as he let everyone believe. And oh, did she have firsthand knowledge when it came to that. Not that she would ever, _ever_ complain. But it really wasn't about the sex. Not ever. Mind-blowing or not, she loved him for a lot more reasons. The fact that she was going to be marrying an absolute _god_ was really just another bonus. One she loved a lot.

Bickslow looked down to where he was spearing into her tight sex over and over and another wicked grin turned his lips as he looked back up to her face. Slightly flushed face, eyes half-closed, and her lip between her teeth. She was still stunning, as she always would be. "What was it… you said… earlier?" He only barely slowed down as his hands moved from where they were on her thighs, and he looked back at Lucy as she only stared at him confusion. "Oh, I remember now," he breathed with another wide grin before he quickly leant forward to cover her mouth with his. An arm gently went behind her back, and slowly, he moved forward enough just to roll them over. "You said you wanted to fuck your _fiancé_."

Lucy slowly pushed herself up with her hands on his stomach, and she revelled in the low groan that came from Bickslow as she just as slowly eased back down on the thick shaft. "I said nothing could… Oh _, god_ ," she moaned, trailing off as she pulled her lip between her teeth again and her head tipped back. "Stop me," she finished, only for another scream to rip from her throat when Bickslow's hands sought out her waist, above her bandages, and slammed her back down again and again.

She could feel that tension quickly continue to build within her, and Lucy was sure she would go flying off the edge of a cliff any moment. Not that she cared, of course. It had been far too long since she'd felt anything close to the pleasure that nearly consumed her entire being right then. Her screams only got louder as her own pace faltered, and she became more and more lost to the almost non-existent world around her with each passing moment.

Her walls tightening around him had Bickslow realising he was in a losing battle, because try as he might, there was no way he could really last much longer. Not at all, really. Hell, he was only a little proud that he'd even managed to hold off that long. She felt far too good, wrapped around his cock and managing to pull him in deeper to her very end, and she sure as hell looked a whole lot better doing it. As much as he loved the sight of her, eyes lidded, chest heaving and breasts bouncing as she sluggishly lifted herself up again and again, he knew that he wasn't the only one right on the edge of bliss. "Fuck… Lucy," he groaned, only throwing his own head back slightly when she turned her hips and rolled against him. "I can't… I'm go—Oh, fuck…"

A lazy smile floated across her lips as she forced herself to open her eyes and look down to Bickslow again. "Do it," she murmured, her voice husky with her impending release. "Cum with me, baby." She knew he was close, feeling him harden even more within her, and she knew that it would be enough to set her off.

Bickslow could only make a sound that he had never been able to describe at her words, and it was one only she could elicit from him. People thought he had a way with words when it came to the bedroom, but really, compared to her, he had nothing. She was the author, after all, and just her words alone could bring him to his knees sometimes. And oh, did he love that. "Jesus… Fu..." Bickslow couldn't even finish his sentence though, not when it was drowned out by his own deep groan and a shudder that ran through his entire body.

As soon as Lucy felt him erupt within her, not registering just how tightly his hand was gripping her waist and one of her legs, she felt that too-tightly coiled cord within her completely snap, and she was instantly thrown into the pleasure-filled ocean at the bottom of that cliff and she was completely consumed.

Lucy finally opened her eyes again as she slowly began to come down with Bickslow, her core still fluttering around the throbbing length deep within her, and she looked down with a sated smile on her lips as she leant down. His arms snaked around her back as she pressed her lips to his in a slow and deep kiss, and gently, he turned them until they were both on their sides, his arms still around her and holding her as close to him as he possibly could, with one of her slender legs draped over his narrow waist. Oh, how he could stay like that forever. He really would if he could. Or at least, sometimes. Or a lot.

"Fuck, I love you, Lucy," he murmured, only lifting one arm to reach behind him for the sheets and the comforter to drape it over them. "And I missed you. Too much."

"I love you too, Bicks," she whispered still slightly breathlessly. "And I missed you too. But that's okay, because now… Now we get to spend the rest of our lives together."

"Yeah, we do."

A quiet laugh slipped past her slightly bruised lips before she sighed in absolute contentment, and as she closed her eyes and ducked her head just under his chin, she quietly said, "And… I know we have lots of catching up to do. Like, a lot… I'm still tired from my last job, and I really, _really_ just want to get some more rest right now." And it wasn't just from the workout she'd just had. No, she was genuinely tired, and now, the injuries she'd gotten on that same job were catching up to her, and Bickslow's presence alone could only make them just that little bit more bearable. Like he always had been able to do, somehow.

He smiled as he tilted his head too softly kiss the top of her forehead, and he did his best to move his arm under her, just so that it was loosely wrapping around her shoulders instead. "Get some rest," he said softly as he closed his own eyes. "We have all the time in the world to catch up."

And they did. They had the rest of their lives to look forward to again, and as Bickslow laid there and willed himself to get some rest with her, he did so with a smile. He had his fiancée in his arms, and truly, for the first time in a very long time, he was happy with everything. Already so quickly, he could feel himself slipping into the comforting embrace of sleep, because he'd really never been able to sleep well without Lucy there beside him.

* * *

It was the early morning sun shining in through the window right above the bed and into Bickslow's eyes that eventually pulled him from what was undoubtedly the best night's sleep he'd had in more than a year, or maybe ever, actually.

Slowly, he opened his eyes, and looked out through the window with just a slightly furrowed brow. He reasoned he'd slept at least ten, maybe eleven hours judging on how light it was. The last thing Bickslow could remember was falling asleep… with Lucy. When he remembered everything from the previous evening, he was quickly grinning like an idiot to no one in particular, just because he was still facing a wall.

He'd proposed! And she'd said yes! And oh, then everything else. From just being able to hold her and tell her he loved her, and to the sex. Good god, was that amazing. As expected. Bickslow still felt like he was on cloud nine, and he was sure he would be for days. If not weeks. Hell, he'd be on cloud nine for the rest of his goddamn life, just because he'd be with Lucy for the rest of his life.

Bickslow honestly could not wait for that. He couldn't wait to actually begin his life with Lucy – again – and be able to look at her and think, 'holy shit, my wife is fucking amazing.' Because that's what he'd think. But, of course, _amazing_ could be swapped out for many other adjectives. Like, beautiful, for example. Or gorgeous, or stunning. Or terrifying… Crazy… But whatever word he could come up with to describe the woman he was so excited to be marrying, he would still love her. He loved her regardless of… Well, anything.

And she was all his.

He slowly turned from where he lay on his stomach, and onto his side to see the woman in question just in front of him, hair splayed out on the pillow and down her back, and sleeping peacefully. Well, she looked like it. Bickslow moved forward slightly, and his hand lightly ran down her arm from her shoulder to her elbow, and then came to rest on her waist as his lips brushed against the top and back of her shoulder.

A soft smile crept onto her face at the soft touches, and a quiet hum left her lips as she moved back against Bickslow. Lucy was sure she was quickly going to get used to waking up next to Bickslow again every morning. "You're up early," she murmured as he slowly began to kiss down the back of her neck, lightly pushing her long hair out of the way. "And… Still here."

It wasn't that she was complaining though. Not at all. Part of her had almost expected him to get back up once she'd fallen asleep – which she knew had been incredibly quickly – and maybe slip out and go back to his own apartment for the rest of the night, leaving a note for her to wake up to. Lucy wouldn't have minded that, because she knew he really did not like her bed all that much. It was nowhere near as comfortable as his had been, and the size alone was an issue.

"I fell asleep when you did and I only just woke up," Bickslow said softly as Lucy turned around to face him. A wide grin split his lips as he shifted uncomfortably though, and he quietly groaned as he stretched his arms out above his head as best as he could. "But… I am wondering just how I managed to stay asleep all night. I'm still trying to figure out how _you_ managed to sleep on this thing for so long."

Lucy rolled her eyes as she gently prodded him in his stomach, just to have him slightly curling in on himself and chuckling quietly. "Yeah, yeah. I remember how much you hated my bed. But… That does get me thinking," she mumbled, suddenly pulling her lip between her teeth.

"Thinking about what?"

"Well, maybe it's time we really did move in together?"

Bickslow blinked back at her as an eyebrow slowly rose, before he finally asked, "You mean, like actually moved in together? Official change of address and all that?"

Lucy's brows suddenly drew together as she looked to Bickslow. "Well, yeah," she replied. "I just thought that maybe it was actually time to do that? You know, since we're engaged now and we'll be living together when we're married anyway…" She paused as she began to worry about just whether or not Bickslow would want to _actually_ move in together. The chaos that was their living arrangements before everything had happened was just a little… Well, messy.

From basically living with Bickslow as it was, to still keeping her apartment because her team had severe boundary issues. Maybe Bickslow had liked things that way? Maybe he liked the odd (and very rare) night where they stayed in separate apartments. Lucy had never thought he did, considering on more than one occasion, he had asked her to _really_ move in with him, or they'd at least talked about Lucy getting rid of her apartment.

"Do you not want to?" Lucy asked nervously. She'd be lying if she said she would be able to understand it if it was the case, because after all, he'd fucking asking her to marry him just the night before. Lucy didn't think he had an issue with making a commitment of any sort, and she never really had.

Bickslow chuckled as he leant forward just to quickly press their lips together, instantly wiping the confused and worried look off his fiancée's face. "Oh _god_ yes, I want to." He lifted a hand just to tuck the section of Lucy's hair that had fallen across her cheek behind her ear, and he grinned at her when he could see the sheer excitement and happiness dancing in the eyes he loved so much. "I just wanted to make sure that you meant like, the full deal. You know, considering the entire issue with your team and all that…"

He was still trying to cope with how many times he'd walked into his own home just to see her team awaiting patiently for one of them to return.

"Full deal," she laughed. Lucy quickly wrapped her arms around him as she sat up slightly, only barely realising that she found herself half sprawled across him as he turned back and wrapped his arms tightly around her and above the bandages that had come slightly loose as she slept. "But… Do you know what I really want right now? Apart from to talk about this and everything and catch up and just spend all day curled up in bed?" she asked as she sat up, her thighs on either side of his hips as she looked down at Bickslow with just a small smirk.

"I'm really hoping you're going to say me."

Lucy shook her head, and only barely rolled her hips, just to watch his eyes darken even more. "I really want a shower," she said slowly. "And then… I really want to go to the guild for breakfast because I haven't seen the guild yet."

Bickslow sighed in slight annoyance, and turned to watch her as she slowly climbed back over him to get to the edge of the bed and then to her feet, and a dark grin crossed his face as he quickly got up just to follow her. His arms caught her around the waist and she slowly turned in his arms as they continued to walk backwards and towards her bathroom. "Well, you can multitask for one of those," he murmured against her lips. "You can shower, and do me at the same time."

"Why do think I said what I did?"

His lips on hers drowned out her giggles as he reached down just to wrap his hands around the backs of her thighs and lift her up and let her arms and legs wrap around him. Already, things had fallen back and gone back to the way things had been before everything had happened, and Bickslow loved that. He loved that far too much, because if anything, everything was better than it had been before.

And from there, he knew it could only get better, because he'd have the sexy vixen in his arms by his side for the rest of his life. "God, I fucking love you."

* * *

 **Okay, I promise you can stop cringing now. Maybe.**

 **So I know the chapter is a little shorter than what I probably would have liked (and you did too, maybe), but that's only because I wanted to have all of the talking and everything else in the next chapter. So, yeah, this is just a little shorter than usual.**

 **But yay! My babies are back together and I'm not making myself half as miserable as I was when writing the last few chapters. But then again, my other stories can make me just as miserable.**

 **Anyway. For those that _still_ read _Shattered_ , I just want to bring up a little something about when that will be getting updated. Since there's only four chapters left (or five, depending on whether or not I decide it needs something else and one of the prompts will get stretched out again), I'm not going to be getting it updated any time soon. I'm still going to be working on the chapters, but I'm going to be waiting until the story is complete before I start posting the remaining ones. **

**It's just so I can focus on my other stories, like this one, and begin work on a few of the others I have planned. Basically, what I'm trying to say is that it isn't going to be finished in the near future. Not even this year. The plan is to have it all completed by the time I start uni classes again, but that's not until the end of February, so there's plenty of time. But really, don't expect chapters for that (on the off chance you actually were) any time soon.**

 **With that... I hope you enjoyed this chapter just a little bit. Maybe. As usual. I'd love to read your reviews, so please, do so! (You know, if you feel like it and all).**

 **Until next time.**

 **\- April**


	45. Chapter 45

**Okay, so this is a super long chapter (like 20k words, wow), and is officially the longest chapter for any of my stories. But, I couldn't split it. If I split it, it wouldn't have done it justice and there would be too much of one thing in each of the chapters. So, I left it. Now, onto the chapter!**

* * *

"Do you think Mira and Laxus will be in the guild this morning?"

Bickslow shrugged as he let the blonde step ahead of him when the rebuilt guild was in sight, and he barely had to increase his pace when she began to pull him towards the building with her hand in his. "I don't know," he said as he quickly caught up to her. "They haven't really been coming in that often. But on the days they did come in, I didn't get in until late. And even then, it wasn't exactly like I was paying much attention to them… I tended to avoid them, actually."

Bickslow still had an awful habit of sleeping late. Of course, when he hadn't been sleeping, he was honestly just awake whenever. It had taken him months to get to a point where he could actually sleep alone well enough that he could shut his mind off and get some rest. But that had never stopped the dreams of Lucy when he'd been gone. Every night he did get some sleep, she was in his head, and it had been like that until just last night.

It wasn't only the first time he'd had a decent night's sleep since everything had happened – from Lucy shutting herself off and then them breaking up and going their separate ways – but it was also the first night he hadn't dreamed of Lucy. He just… Slept. Nothing more, nothing less.

When he finally did get back to Magnolia with the rest of his team, and after seeing Lucy in Hargeon and hearing about everything he hadn't known about, it had gotten just that little bit harder to fall asleep again. He couldn't shut his mind off most nights, and more often that he really should have, he ended up just passing out from being blind drunk… Hence the not getting into the guild until late, because more often than not, he was hungover to hell. Between almost loathing his existence again for not being there for Lucy when she shouldn't have been alone, missing her far too much to put into words, not exactly wanting to be around Laxus and Mira and Jax all that much (on the odd days they were there), and hating all things bright and loud for the majority of his days… Yeah, he didn't have many reasons to actually get up and function properly or be an integral part of society. So he stayed in bed.

But now? Now he didn't have that many reasons to stay in bed, staring at that damn book on the nightstand or the frame on the wall. He had a reason to get up, to smile and to be happy. He would still hate himself, because more than anything, he wished he had stayed and tried to do more for Lucy. But it wasn't anywhere near as bad as it had been just a few weeks earlier. Because now he had Lucy again, and he was sure as hell not going to be leaving again.

Bickslow cleared his throat when he saw her looking up at him, the concern in her eyes doing nothing to ease his guilt over everything. Bickslow knew that Lucy understood why he would have avoided the new family, but he didn't want her to feel bad about that. He squeezed her hand that was in his, and smiled softly at her for just a moment as they kept walking towards the guild, and asked, "Why do you want to know, anyway?"

Lucy's face suddenly changed, and though the concern was still there, she was only showing the sheer excitement as she tried her very best not to jump and scream with joy like a child. "Because I want to tell someone!" she beamed, her smile only getting brighter as she saw her excitement mirrored in Bickslow's eyes and face. "Don't you want to tell your best friend?"

"Well, yeah," Bickslow said slowly. "But why Laxus? I would have thought you'd want to tell your team first." _Hopefully they don't have a complete meltdown…_ Bickslow had still planned on telling her team at some point that he was going to propose, but, yeah… Things just hadn't worked out. And he sure as hell hadn't had the time to suddenly run off back to the guild just to ask her team if he could marry her. It didn't help that he was sure they would have just looked like he was even more of a madman than he really was, considering they'd been apart for a year, and suddenly he was wanting to propose.

"I do want to tell my team, but Laxus… I think Laxus helped the most with everything. Because he… Well, he knew about the baby…"

Bickslow sighed. "I know. I kind of went off at him about knowing, too." He paused when he heard her quietly begin to sniffle, and he pulled his hand from hers just to wind it around her back to rest gently on her waist, and pull her into his side. Smiling softly, he said, "But hey, I'm still not mad at you for not telling me, okay? I get it. I do. And I know that you didn't even tell him. Wendy did."

"Yeah, well… She's sweet, and she's an angel, honestly. And I know she didn't really mean to let it slip, but…" She let out a shaky breath when she looked up to see the large guild doors just ahead of them. "It was just nice knowing that someone else knew. And I'm really, really sorry that I didn't tell you last year…"

"Water under the bridge. Don't worry about it anymore, alright?"

Lucy smiled up at Bickslow as they came to a stop. She loved that Bickslow was so understanding of everything, that he was so willing to completely forgive in her just a single heartbeat for her mistakes. Every time, he'd always done that, no matter how big or small it was. Lucy admired that part of Bickslow, too. The fact he was kind and caring, and he was just incredibly forgiving. And if things had been the other way around, Lucy didn't think she would be able to just completely and instantly forgive someone for not letting her know about something as huge and important as a baby. Especially when that other person was the other parent.

But Bickslow… Bickslow was just doing his best to make Lucy feel better about it. She knew that he was hurting too, or at least he had been if he felt it necessary to avoid his best friend and his son. Lucy had wanted to avoid Bickslow getting hurt – knowing any pain – but she could see that it was a necessary pain. She had wanted Bickslow to know, because he deserved to know, and there was just no scenario that existed where he wouldn't have been hurt just a little bit. It was his child for heaven's sake; of course it was going to be painful. It was just that they could move past it together now. With Bickslow, Lucy would be able to accept it and forgive herself (again), and it would get less painful with each day. She knew that.

"I'll do my best not to," she said softly with a small nod. She pulled Bickslow's hand from her waist just as she stepped forward, and let their fingers intertwine between them once again. She gave him another brilliant smile, then as her mood completely shifted again, she laughed, "But can we go into the guild now? I need to find someone to tell before I completely burst at the seams or something!"

Bickslow chuckled at her overflowing excitement as they took the last few steps across the rebuilt courtyard, and he found the more excited Lucy got, the more he did too. "You know, I really never expected you to get like this."

"How can I not be? I mean, I'm marrying my best friend."

He gave her a tongue-lolling grin just before they reached the wooden doors. "I thought Natsu was your best friend? Or was it Levy?" he asked.

Lucy shrugged. "Both are, but you're my _bestest_ friend," she giggled. "Don't tell Natsu I said that though."

Bickslow leant down just to lightly kiss her temple as they kept walking before a hand went out for the heavy doors. "I really don't plan on it," he murmured. "But you're my best friend too." And she was, and she always would be. Not Laxus, not Freed, not Evergreen, not Gajeel. It was Lucy. And it was just truly great to know that he was going to be able to marry his best friend in the entire world.

Slowly, Bickslow pushed the doors open for them to walk through, hand in hand. It wasn't that early, but it also wasn't late. And given the time the two arrived, the guild was slowly filling up by that point so when they did walk in, they definitely received more than a few shocked looks and second glances in their direction. It wasn't as if they minded though, and if anything they were a little used to it. It really wasn't the first time they'd walked into the guild together to have everyone stare at them. The first time had been the day after Christmas and the day after he'd told the entire guild as well as Lucy that he loved her, but that was different to right then. That time they'd known they'd been together for the last couple of months, but this time… This time, everyone knew they'd been broken up for the last year, and yet suddenly, they were walking back into the guild like nothing had ever happened.

And that was what truly mattered. Everything was going back to the way things were, and neither could be happier. They were picking up right where they'd left of (sort of). They both knew that they'd have a bit of explaining to do to the guild, to their friends and family, but neither cared. It was warranted, after all. But that was okay. Explaining they could do.

They remained mostly silent as they walked through the guild and over to the mostly empty bar, with Lucy only whispering something about how the guild looked the exact same as it had the year before. Cana was probably out dealing with a hangover somewhere else for once, and Master Makarov was probably upstairs. With Mira and Laxus mostly out because of their son, Lisanna had taken over the bar with the help of Kinana, but neither were out just yet. Most likely busy in the guild kitchen just to the side of the main room, since that was where Mira was usually to be found around that time of day.

Bickslow took a seat on one of the bar stools towards the centre of the large counter, a few seats away from where a couple of other mages whose names he'd never bothered to find out sat (he recognised them, but there were a lot of people in the guild. More so than he actually remembered just the year before, but that was to be expected since they had just re-opened), and then just another couple of seats away from Elfman and Evergreen, who at that point, was too busy scolding the only male Strauss to pay any attention to what he was staring at, wide eyed, just over the top of her head.

Bickslow could only grin at his oblivious friend and teammate, and he only made himself comfortable on his chair as Lucy did the same in his lap (just because he was enjoying having her incredibly close, and for the time being, he was completely fine as being used a chair, or a pillow, or whatever). Lucy's eyes slowly roved over the half-empty guild again from where she sat, only smiling softly to those who were still looking at the old-yet-new couple in complete shock. Neither her team nor her closest friends outside of Team Natsu were there (aside from Evergreen, really, and Lucy was just waiting for the Fairy mage to turn around and most likely squeal in delight with her), so she really had no one to tell just yet. She didn't want to blurt it out to the guild. No, it would be their teams and their close circle of friends first, and then no doubt once Mira found out, the entire guild would hear from her anyway. That was how it would happen, and that was perfectly fine.

"Are you even listening to a thing I'm saying?" Evergreen asked the Take-Over mage in front of her, her eyes narrowed and her fan poised and ready to swat the idiot with for not listening.

"Uh…" Elfman's eyes continued to flick between his irritated girlfriend who was probably on the verge of lifting up her glasses just to turn him to stone, and to the couple sitting just behind her, both with wide grins on their faces as they waited silently. Though, Bickslow did know that his fiancée in his lap was having a hard time keeping quiet. She was nearly shaking in his arms that were tightly wrapped around her middle she was that excited. Bickslow knew it was taking everything she had not to just say something to force the Fairy mage to turn around and look at them. But in a way, he was still just a little amazed that no one in the guild had completely made a scene about them yet.

Yet…

But had Elfman been listening to the Fairy mage in front of him? Nope. But had Evergreen been paying attention or noticing any of the times he had tried to stop her rambling and ranting and get her to just look behind her? Definitely not. Evergreen sighed as she rolled her eyes, then muttered, "Of course not. You probably weren't—"

"Ever, honey…"

"—even listening to what I just said then. It's a wonder I manage to get anything through that way too thick skull of yours sometimes. You probably just see my mouth moving but hear nothing but 'man' coming out."

Elfman rolled his eyes then, and quickly leant forward from where he sat on his own bar stool, and he placed his large hands on the (in comparison) small woman's shoulders, and forced her to swing around to face the opposite direction. "I was trying to get you to stop talking so you could turn around," Elfman explained over her confused shrieks and the sound of her paper fan hitting his hands and wrists.

Evergreen's eyes suddenly went wide, and she suddenly understood just why the Take-Over mage had been looking so downright puzzled. She had thought it was because she was just explaining something that he was just too dense to understand, but now? Now she really understood it. And she really did not blame him for not listening to a word she had saying.

She looked between the two mages just in front of her as her paper fan fell to her lap and then to the ground.

"About time," Lucy laughed at the speechless mage.

Evergreen pointed to Lucy and then to Bickslow. And then she did it again, her brows drawing together as she took in the sight before her. "You two?" she whispered.

"Mm-hmm," Bickslow hummed as he lowered his head just to press a light kiss to the side of Lucy's cheek. Just for emphasis, really.

Lucy turned her own head just slightly to glance towards Bickslow, and with a bright smile she matched completely, she turned back to Evergreen, who she could see was slowly becoming less confused and a slow grin was forming on her lips, just like Elfman had. "We…" Lucy lifted her hand from where she had them folded over Bickslow's own, and she held it up for Evergreen to see the sparkling ring on her finger, then continued, "Are also getting married."

Evergreen quickly looked between the two and Bickslow's grin got wider when he saw her get just that tiny bit more excited along with Lucy. "Oh my god! Really?!" she asked quietly.

"Yeah," Lucy laughed quietly.

"Oh my… This is…" She paused as she tried to find the words, only to sigh in frustration for not being able to find them, before stepping forward to throw her arms around the blonde's shoulders. "Congratulations!" she squealed, and when Lucy began to… Well, Bickslow couldn't really describe the noise that she made, but it was somewhere between a very high pitched squeal and a laugh (and of course, he loved it because he knew it was just one from how excited she was), he tried his best to get his ears away from the two women. They were loud. Incredibly loud. And he valued his hearing.

Evergreen was truly happy for her friends though. Not only for Bickslow, because she was damn well proud of him for actually asking her to marry him (finally!), but for Lucy too. Just like Freed and Laxus, she'd grown to care about the Celestial mage a lot in the year that the two had been together before everything had fallen apart. They'd each let her in and welcomed her into their little family, and over time as they got to know her, they'd truly been able to see why Bickslow loved her as much as he did. It wasn't so much that she was surprisingly a perfect match for him, but it was more that she was a brilliant person. She was smart, she was kind, she was surprisingly funny (well, to Bickslow at least), but most of all, she was the amazing Light of the Guild that everyone loved in their own way.

But when it came to Bickslow, Evergreen was truly over the moon for him. He was basically her brother, just like Freed and Laxus were, and it hurt her to see Bickslow as anything but the laughing and grinning and idiot she'd always known. Just like it hurt all of them, really, because for a long time, all they'd had was each other. And even after they'd been welcomed back into the guild after everything with the Battle of Fairy Tail, it had still taken them a while to truly open up to others and step out of their comfort zone. They'd still kept to themselves, and they'd still never really taken part in the guild-wide events – although Bickslow had always been the exception with that. He'd always been loud and obnoxious, and on the days they were in the guild, he was either hanging or sitting up on the rafters just because he liked the form of solitude it gave him, or playing pranks on people.

But… Over time, it had gotten better. Their tight-knit family had made room for them to grow as their own people. Laxus had found Mira and Erza in a way, given that they were the few S-Class mages other than Gildarts who actually went in to the guild. Evergreen had found Elfman and the other Strauss'. Freed had always been close to Levy, just because they'd shared a few common interests. But Bickslow? Well, Bickslow had probably taken the longest to actually get out of his comfort zone. He'd always had his babies, but eventually, he'd started getting along with Gajeel, and he'd ended up becoming one of his closest friends.

And then there'd been Lucy. Lucy had changed everything for all of them. Not just for Bickslow, but for his entire team. But it was in a good way. Somehow, though, Lucy had been the driving force in making their family and circle of close friends just get that little bit bigger. Bickslow had brought Lucy into their family, and Lucy had brought the entire fucking guild. Well, almost. With Lucy came her own team, and then Levy and Gajeel. And then suddenly, it wasn't just the four of them, and they all loved that.

But with Lucy came a better Bickslow too. Being with Lucy had made Bickslow a better person, and they'd all been able to see it. Even long before anyone had found out the two of them being together. He was happier, and he wasn't even half as much of an asshole as he'd been for a really long time. Hell, he was a little smarter too, and even just a little more thoughtful and caring. Lucy had just brought out the very best in Bickslow, and they all loved her for it.

And right then, Bickslow was happier than Evergreen had seen him in an incredibly long time. Honestly, Evergreen was sure it was the happiest she had ever seen him, in all the years she had known the Seith mage. And just to see Bickslow like that, and to see the way he was looking at Lucy… It made Evergreen happier than she could put into words.

After seeing how much pain Bickslow had been in for the last year – and just the last few weeks alone, too – she had needed to see Bickslow truly smile again. She had needed to hear him laugh, and as much as she really hated how he stuck his tongue out, she needed to see that great big grin of his. She knew as well as Freed did that having to leave Lucy had completely crushed him. Giving up on the life that they had both wanted and telling her to go and live it with someone else… Evergreen could really only imagine how Bickslow had truly felt, because undoubtedly, it would have hurt him to leave the one he loved more than life itself more than he would ever have let on. He'd never exactly talked about how he felt as they'd travelled Fiore, only ever saying he'd be fine one day, once he knew that she was happy again and living the life she deserved

To love someone so much that you'd be willing to sacrifice your own happiness and future, just so the other person could get theirs. No matter what. That's what Bickslow had done. He had willingly made himself miserable when Evergreen was sure that he'd known deep down that he would always be miserable without Lucy. And that, as horrible was it, Evergreen admired. Just a little bit. Because what Bickslow and Lucy had, that was true love. And she wanted to get to that point with Elfman one day, because without a doubt, if push came to shove, there was no way in hell she'd be able to do what Bickslow had done. She didn't think Elfman would either… But one day, she liked to think that either one of them would be able to do that. If it were absolutely necessary, of course, because Evergreen knew, just like Freed and Laxus did, that if Bickslow wasn't sure leaving Lucy was the best and right thing to do for her, then there was no way he would have done it.

But oh, to see her best friend and one of her closest friends back together and happy again, it warmed Evergreen's not-so stone heart. That was what they'd both needed, because without each other, they didn't stand a chance at being happy, and everyone else knew it. Because undoubtedly, seeing two people who quite obviously belonged together fall apart wasn't only heartbreaking to those two people, but it was to everyone around them too.

"I am so, so, _so_ happy for you two," Evergreen said with a warm smile as she sat back down on her own stool next to Elfman once again. "And I'm sure everyone else will be, too. You know Mira's going to completely freak when she finds out, right? So, you know, try and make sure she's not holding Jax when you tell her, alright?"

Bickslow quietly chuckled along with Lucy as he lowered his chin to rest on her shoulder. "Thanks, Ever," he murmured. It really meant the world to him that one of his best friends in the entire world was thrilled from him – for _them_. "But yeah, she probably will, but we'll try our best to make sure no one who has a tendency to pass out at the slightest sign of romance is holding him," he laughed, turning his head slightly just to press another light kiss to Lucy's cheek. "Won't we, Cosplayer?"

"Of course we will, Bicks," Lucy giggled. There would be no newborn-dropping anywhere near her that day. Or any day… Though with Laxus' track record from what she'd heard, well… Lucy could only hope that Laxus wouldn't drop his own son _in front_ of his mate.

* * *

Slowly, the guild began to fill up, and as the day went on, more and more people came up to congratulate the happy couple on their engagement and getting back together, and Bickslow and Lucy couldn't be happier with it all. Things were truly going back to normal, and that was what they needed.

After they'd calmed Lisanna down – who after hearing squealing coming from the bar, had come running back out to find out what was going on, and had promptly channelled her elder sister's matchmaking prowess and enthusiasm for happy couples and all things romantic and cute – and finally managed to get something for breakfast from herself and Kinana, they'd left the bar just to go and sit at a table with Evergreen and Freed once he'd arrived.

Just sitting there with Bickslow's team, listening to everything they'd done over the last year, made everything feel like it was truly normal again. Even though her own team and her other closest friends who she wished would just hurry up and get there so she could tell them weren't there yet, she felt like she was home. The guild, Bickslow, her friends and family… That was what only Magnolia could offer her. Not Crocus, and not even any other town in Fiore, or even the world. Because without everything she had then, she would never truly be home.

"So did you guys do anything special for Christmas?" Lucy asked before she took a sip from her smoothie, turning slightly to glance towards Bickslow next to her. So far, she had learned that they'd spent the first couple of months after they'd broke up just travelling Fiore, only taking on a few odd jobs where they could get them.

Bickslow's head tilted slightly as he tried to remember just what it was he'd done on Christmas. He'd spent most of every holiday between leaving Lucy and coming back to Magnolia just getting completely wasted. It was just a way to make it a little less painful. But, he still had the awful ability to be able to remember almost everything he did when drinking, and then there'd more times than he'd like where he'd hated that he could do that, because more often than not, he really didn't want to remember some of the things he did when drunk.

He sighed as he remembered the last Christmas, beginning with walking in on Freed and Evergreen just to find them reading that damn magazine that he really wished had been porn, the more he thought about it. "I got drunk on a rooftop," he muttered as he lifted his hand up just to stare at his polished nails. "Not sure what those two did."

"Why on earth did you get drunk on a rooftop on Christmas?"

Freed and Evergreen remained suspiciously quiet as they tried their best to remain inconspicuous and let Bickslow answer it. They'd quickly realised it was best to let Bickslow do all the talking when it had come to what _he'd_ done over the year. Not because they thought it would be best to leave it to him to decide what he wanted Lucy knowing (though they also saw that he had no problems with telling Lucy absolutely everything, including just how bad it had been for him for a really long time), but because he'd actually spent a lot of his time alone. He had always been going off on his own, and more often than not, he could disappear for more than a day at a time.

He'd always come back though, and they'd never talked about it much. It was always just Bickslow needing somewhere quiet to go and clear his thoughts, but there had been just a few times where he'd come back heavily intoxicated by… Well, _something_. They never really knew just what it was he'd had or taken, and from what they had been able to tell, Bickslow never really had either. But it was thankfully just a few times, but each of those times had been around a holiday or another date that meant a lot to Bickslow.

Like Valentine's Day, and the 25th February (though Freed and Evergreen had never figured out just why that date had been so special). His own birthday had been just another one of the times he'd disappeared for three days and come back in less than stellar shape, and Lucy's birthday was much the same. To say that the first few months of the new year had been more than terrible was a gross understatement.

But Bickslow was more than willing to talk about it all. In the middle of the guild, because there, he believed that nothing could bring him down. Not when he had Lucy right there and everything was getting better again. He could talk about his past, because it was the past. "Weekly Sorcerer," Bickslow sighed again as he turned to look at Lucy, just to see her grimace at his worlds. "I mean, you looked hot as hell, but… Yeah… It was just a little depressing." _Or a lot._

"Oh, god…" Lucy groaned as she quickly turned and ducked her head against Bickslow's chest, shaking her head as his other arm that wasn't already around her joined his other. "I was hoping you didn't read that edition," she muttered. She had been so mad at the editors for weeks after she'd found out what they'd done. The modelling itself she had no problem with. It was just what they'd published it with. That had been more than unfair, and not in the slightest bit true. He hadn't broken her heart, and if that wasn't bad enough, it was that Bickslow had actually been named. "I had no idea they were going to put all of that in there… I'm so, so sorry you saw that… It wasn't… It wasn't true at all."

Bickslow smiled down at her softly as he shrugged. "It's fine. I know it wasn't your fault, but it did give me another reason to hate the stupid magazine anyway." And he had plenty of reasons to hate it. The only reason he'd even read it at all in the last year was because Lucy had articles and stories published in it. Other than that, he would prefer to be burning every single copy that existed. When Lucy looked back up with another frown, Bickslow could only smirk as he sat back on the bench, one arm going back to rest over the top of the backrest, and the other remaining around Lucy as she slowly sat up. Leaning in just that little bit more, smirk still firmly in place, he murmured, "Besides, _I_ get to spend every single Christmas with you from now on, because you're all mine."

Lucy giggled as she looked up again. "That I am," she whispered. She was all his, and he was all hers. Again and forever, and it was a great feeling.

So Lucy continued to learn about what Bickslow and his team had gotten up on their year apart. Bickslow didn't ask about what Lucy had done much, but he didn't stop her from answering when Freed and Evergreen asked what she'd done just a few times. It wasn't that Bickslow didn't want to know what Lucy had gotten up to, because he really did. Laxus hadn't really told him much about Lucy in the letters he'd sent, only a few bits and pieces about how she'd finally settled down somewhere (Bickslow never knew where), and that she had a new job and that she was working on herself. It was just enough to let Bickslow know how she was doing; to know that she was finally moving on like he'd been waiting and wanting her to do for months.

Of course, when Lucy told Mira about her horrendous dates that her co-workers had all but forced her to go out on, Laxus had found it prudent to tell Bickslow that too. And sure, it really hurt like hell to know that she had started dating again – it was why Bickslow had spent the week around Valentine's Day mostly out of it – but it was just a little satisfying to know that her date had been terrible. He knew he shouldn't have felt that way, but he really couldn't help. Just because he'd told her to go and live a life with someone else, it didn't mean it didn't hurt to see her moving on.

But still, Bickslow would absolutely love to know about everything Lucy had done in the last year. From the terrible dates to her job to… Well, everything. He wanted to know it all. He just didn't want to do so in the guild, because there were things he wanted to talk to her about that he didn't think should be discussed in a room full of people. For now, though, Bickslow was completely fine with just talking about what he'd done, because he was more than happy to curl up in bed later with her and just listen to her stories of her grand (or not so grand) adventures. Never would Bickslow get sick of that.

It was only a little while later when a yawning Dragon Slayer and a Script mage made their way into the guild that morning. When Levy stopped dead in her tracks, books clutched to her chest with wide eyes, Gajeel with his eyes closed mid-yawn ran straight into her, and on instinct, his hands caught her just in case she did fall. "Jesus, Shrimp," he muttered. "What'd you stop there for?"

Levy didn't answer though, and when she remained silent, Gajeel's pierced brows drew together at the shocked expression on her face before he slowly lifted his eyes and turned his head to try and follow her gaze. So when he saw his best friend visorless and clad in normal clothes for once, and his ex-girlfriend sitting at a table together on the near opposite side of the guild, his own expression mirrored his mate's just beside him. "Holy shit," he whispered just before he took off after Levy, who was suddenly weaving her way towards them.

Lucy turned as a quick dash of blue streaked her peripherals, and she looked to the bluenette suddenly sitting beside her with a warm smile. She had the same look on her face as everyone else before them had had prior to finding out they were indeed back together. But of course, it really wasn't that hard to figure out. People just needed to hear it, because for all they knew, they could just be starting out as friends. Incredibly close friends judging by how close they were sitting (but then again, they'd also been dating for a year, so there was that to take into consideration), but friends nonetheless. Of course, that wasn't the case and everyone really already knew it. It was just courteous to ask and then congratulate upon hearing the news, really.

Levy looked between Lucy and Bickslow just next to her. "So?" she said expectedly, barely paying any attention to the silent high-five Gajeel gave Bickslow as he sat down next to the Seith mage. "Is this what I think it is?"

"Well, what do think _this_ is?" Lucy asked.

Gajeel sniggered when Lucy shifted her left hand on her lap, expertly hiding it from Levy, but not from him. He knew that there was bound to be a story to go with just how they'd gone from broken up one day, to engaged to be wed the next, and involving those two, he was sure it was going to be just a little interesting. Or at least he hoped.

Levy shrugged as she finally placed her heavy books on the table. "I'm hoping that this means you two are back together." And she did hope that. Really. Knowing the hell Lucy had been through, and then not to mention the last few weeks alone for Bickslow… Yeah, she really fucking hoped that two of her closest friends were finally going to be back where they belonged – _with each other_.

"Well, Bicks," Lucy sighed as she leant back into the chair and Bickslow, and she turned to face the grinning Seith mage. "Do you think being engaged classifies as being back together?"

"It might do," Bickslow answered. He could see Lucy was just having fun with it, and he was sure as hell going to go along with it. After all, where was the fun in straight out saying, 'hello, yes, we're back together and getting married' to every person who came up to them and asked? They'd only really been in the guild a little over an hour and they'd already had to answer that question more times than they could count. They both knew that they'd be having to answer that question a lot more times that day alone, so yeah, spicing it up a little was going to make things interesting.

Levy let out a shriek had Bickslow wincing (again) along with Gajeel, and before he knew it, the two girls were giggling and hugging each other. As expected, really. Bickslow barely paid any attention to just what it was they were saying to each other in their super high pitched voices, and to be fair, he wasn't even sure he'd be able to understand it if he tried. So instead, he just sat back and folded his arms across his chest and let them be, because after all, as long as Lucy was happy and excited and giddy and whatever the fuck she was, Bickslow was too.

Gajeel nudged the Seith mage in the side and nodded with a smirk, gesturing to the women just beside him who were far too deep into their conversation… And apparently admiring the ring, of course. "So? How'd you do it, huh?" Gajeel asked.

"Do what?" Bickslow replied, suddenly looking to the Dragon Slayer with an eyebrow slightly raised.

"Ask her." Was Gajeel really wanting to know just how the guy had managed to ask her to marry him? Yeah, he really was. He was his best friend after all, and given that Lucy was Levy's best friend, he'd taken far more of an interest in their relationship than he would have liked. Plus, Gajeel knew his own girlfriend very well, and he was sure she would love to know how they'd come to be back together again. "Get down on one knee and all that?"

Bickslow shrugged as he lifted a hand just to sift through the hair above his neck. "Not really," he mumbled. "Kinda just… Asked her."

Levy suddenly leant to the side to look past Lucy as she settled back against Bickslow's side. "What? No grand romantic gesture or anything?" Levy asked incredulously.

"It wasn't romantic in the slightest. I didn't even plan on asking her, to be honest."

Lucy laughed as she lightly pressed a kiss to his cheek, then said, "Oh, come on. It was at least a _little_ romantic."

"There is nothing romantic about an unplanned, practically on impulse proposal. Especially when you're covered in bandages and we hadn't even brought up whether or not we wanted to get back together at all."

"That's what makes it so sweet, you dork," Lucy laughed again. It was their proposal story, and even if he'd asked her while they were having a goddamn shower, she still would have found it all romantic. Bandages on, dried tears on her cheeks and all. It was romantic as all hell to Lucy, especially considering the date. "That, and that it just happened to be the 25th. Although, I am just a little curious now…"

Freed suddenly looked up with confusion etched on his face, and he looked between the two opposite him. "What exactly is so special about the 25th?" he asked softly.

"First date was on August 25th," Bickslow smiled before he looked back down to Lucy, then guessed, "Though I'm guessing you want to know how I was going to ask you last year?" Lucy nodded, and he sighed as he lifted his arm to wrap it around her shoulders once again. "Wel—"

"Wait, hang on," Evergreen cut in suddenly. "So your first date was on the 25th, and I'm assuming you proposed at some point yesterday…" Her brows drew together slightly as she tried to piece it all back together. She'd never been particularly good with dates and such; that was what Freed was always good with. "And if you'd planned on proposing _last_ year… You know, before you broke up and all… I'm guessing you were going to propose on the 25th of last year?"

Bickslow nodded. "That was the plan."

"Holy fuck, you romantic son of a bitch," Gajeel laughed. "Asking her exactly a year after you wanted to? That's pretty fuckin' romantic." Even by Gajeel's standards it was, and even if the guy hadn't planned it, it was at least pretty damn nice.

"Seriously? Even you think it was romantic now?"

Lucy giggled along with Levy before she gently shoved his shoulder just to wipe the scowl off his face when he looked back down to her. "If Gajeel says it's romantic, then it's romantic. Just deal with it," she giggled, only getting a slight frown from her fiancé. "But come on, tell me what you were planning." She really was curious, because whenever Bickslow did plan something, he did seem to go all out and amaze her every time. It wasn't as if she'd wished he'd asked her any other way – the point was that they were engaged, and that was all that mattered – but she just wanted to know what she would have found waiting for her just a year earlier.

Bickslow shook his head slightly. He was still entirely convinced it wasn't romantic in the slightest. Not anywhere near what he'd been planning, anyway, and if Lucy – and everyone else, for that matter – wanted to know what his grand romantic gesture should have been, then he'd tell them. Sighing again, he began again as he kept looking at Lucy, totally lost in the depths of her soft brown eyes. As usual. "So, I was going to take you back to Cartervale on the 24th, so we'd have the entire day and not just the afternoon to do everything."

"Why Cartervale?" Levy asked quietly. "Isn't that like a five-hour train ride from here?"

Lucy turned slightly to smile at her friend. "That was where the job we got paired up on was."

"Anyway," Bickslow continued, smiling again when Lucy looked back up at him. "So I was going to take you to that café near the station for breakfast. That one we went to just before we left after that job. And then, I was going to let you drag me around the town and let you decide what you wanted to do. Like shop or do touristy things or whatever. It wasn't like I had the entire day planned out."

"Let me drag you around town, huh?" Lucy said slyly. In their time together, she'd quickly realised that Bickslow had hated being dragged around with her. Especially when she went shopping. Of course, there had been the few times where he'd just given up and let her take him around to all sorts of tours or book signings and god knows what else she could find on. But when it came to shopping… It was always with his money. Not that he ever cared though, because he always insisted that she do so. He really just liked spoiling the hell out of her.

"All day," Bickslow laughed. "But between doing whatever it is you wanted to do, I was going to take you out to lunch. And then at some point, it would be back to the hotel – which, if you hadn't gotten us banned for life from the other one, would be the same one we stayed at the last time – to get ready for dinner."

"How on earth did Bunny get you banned from a hotel?" Gajeel asked, the corner of his mouth lifting up into a knowing smirk.

Bickslow smirked back at the Dragon Slayer before he quickly said, "Noise complaints." Lucy not-so gently elbowed him in the side then, and Bickslow could only turn to his blushing bride-to-be with a wide grin. She may have been engaged to a total pervert, but she still wasn't fond of talking about her sex life with people. Well, other than Levy, of course. There were practically no secrets between the two when it came to their bedroom escapades, and of course, their partners were none the wiser to just how much was shared between the two. "Well, it's true," Bickslow chuckled. "But… Then we were going to go down to that trail, and you know, I was probably going to do that entire speech thing again and all that like I did last time, but I wasn't actually going to propose. Not yet, anyway."

"You were going to make me think you were though, right?" Lucy asked.

He nodded. "So then it would be dinner at this like, super fancy restaurant, and I'd keep talking about how things had changed so much in a year and how great you were and how much I loved you and all that. You know, keep leading up to what you'd hopefully think was me asking you to marry me."

Lucy saw the way his grin slowly turned more mischievous as he went on, and her own mouth twisted into a tight line. She was sure she would have quickly grown frustrated and confused by it all, had it actually happened. A great day with so many opportunities for Bickslow to propose, only to be kept waiting and have her impatience grow as he kept making it seem like he would be. She was sure that's what would happen, because just hearing what Bickslow had been planning had her feeling that same way. Though it wasn't anywhere near what she expected, she was still just that little bit frustrated.

But she knew she would have still kept waiting and hoping that he would ask her, even if it meant she'd have to had kept her frustration at bay.

"But I wouldn't, of course," Bickslow continued. He knew what was going through Lucy's mind, and it was honestly exactly what he hoped for. "So then, you know, back to the hotel. And then hopefully by then, you'd be really annoyed at me, 'cause you probably would have expected me to ask you by that point in the night, but I still wouldn't. And you wouldn't say anything, because you're too proud for that."

And Bickslow was right. She wouldn't say anything. She would stay quiet, avoid the entire topic and she would definitely not, under any circumstances, ask whether or not the guy was going to ask her to marry him or not.

"So then, right when you're probably on the verge of hating me, I would ask you," he said softly. "Right before midnight; 11:59PM. I'd put one of the babies' souls in the ring, and then I'd ask you."

Lucy sighed as she shook her head, and she couldn't keep the smile off her face. Not even if she'd tried to. An entire day… She'd have spent an entire day waiting for him to pop the question, only to have him finally ask it when she really would least expect it and when she'd no doubt be more than a little disappointed. But Bickslow would know that, and Lucy could see that it was why he would wait until the very last minute of that day. Just because it would be when she least expected it.

And that… That, Lucy really loved. Because even when she'd be disappointed and more than a little frustrated with Bickslow, it would take her less than a second to give him her answer. She wouldn't need sixty seconds to decide. And that, she knew Bickslow also would have known. So as Levy and Evergreen continued to 'aww' at the happy ending to what would have been their proposal story, Lucy smiled up at Bickslow before she lifted her head just a little bit more to lightly press her lips to his. "Sometimes, you're an ass," she whispered. "But I still love you, even when you do frustratingly romantic and sweet things like that."

* * *

By noon, the table at which Bickslow and Lucy sat was just a little crowded – themselves, then the rest of the Rajinshuu, Gajeel and Levy, plus Cana, and Lucy's own team. To Bickslow, having Lucy's team know and just be happy for himself and Lucy was what felt the greatest to him. They were her best friends and the closest thing she had to a family, and if anything, they should hate him for leaving. He knew that they didn't know the half of what had gone on, but that didn't matter. The point was that he'd still left when he shouldn't have.

But maybe it was because Bickslow wasn't going to be able to forgive himself for it – for not trying harder, maybe – that had him believing that no one else should forgive him. It wasn't exactly like he deserved to be marrying Lucy, because even though they'd spent a year together, and it had truly been the best year of his twenty-four-and-a-half years of living to date, he'd never really once been able to convince himself that he ever deserved to have someone like her in his life.

Lucy had always known that Bickslow felt that way too, but there wasn't anything she could do about it. She'd been able to stop him from believing that she deserved someone far better than him – for the most part, anyway – but she hadn't been able to stop him from thinking that he didn't deserve her. No matter how much she tried to make him see differently, she just couldn't. Bickslow was always just going to believe that he didn't deserve to have her, and after everything that had happened in the last year, he believed that even more.

It was his guilt getting to him then though. He left when he shouldn't have, and yet, she had forgiven him for it. Instantaneously. Hell, she hadn't even had to forgive him at all, apparently, and that, Bickslow didn't quite understand. She should hate him, not love him. She shouldn't have agreed to marry him and spend the rest of her life with him. At least, he still didn't think she should have.

But the fact that Lucy had (sort of) forgiven him was just one of the many things he did love about her. She always managed to forgive and see past the bad in someone. No matter what. She'd forgiven Bickslow for all he'd done on the day they'd met – hell, he'd tried to break up with her, broke her heart, and then he'd still ended up getting laid after it all – and she'd forgiven him for leaving. Because she knew that he'd thought he was doing the right thing at the time, and she truly believed he had.

But… He just didn't believe he deserved her. He didn't think he ever would, to be honest. But he was okay with that. He was okay with feeling like he was the luckiest man in the entire world, just because he had the greatest woman in the entire world who was so far out of his league that it wasn't even funny, and he would do for the rest of his life. Bickslow wasn't going to take that for granted, either. He never had, and he never would. He was damn well aware of the fact that if he screwed things up again, he wouldn't get another chance with her. He wasn't going to screw up what he had with Lucy ever again, because right then, he was far too selfish to even think about doing so.

He wanted to marry her. He always had. He wanted to cherish her and spend the rest of his life with her, because he just wanted to be _happy_. And after spending so long in a state of misery, he didn't want to give up on that happiness and future again. It didn't really matter that he didn't deserve to have someone like Lucy love him either, because the point was that she did. She loved him just as much as he did her, and Bickslow knew it. She was the one that he needed the most, and he was hers. Like it had always been, because without her, he just wasn't complete. She was, without a doubt, his other half, and even to that very day, it still amazed him that he found the love of his life in such a person.

He wasn't going to let that go again. He would stay there, with her, for the rest of his life, because it was where he belonged. It was where he'd always belonged, and everyone around them knew it. It was why they were all so happy for them and not at all caring about how they'd gone from not seeing each other for a year, to suddenly being engaged. It just didn't matter, because the point was that they were back together.

So as they sat there with their teams and their friends, yelling and laughing at each other like they always used to do, the conversation shifted away from what Bickslow and his team had done in the year, to what everyone else had done. Everyone was just catching up with each other and quickly falling into the routine of how things had once been.

It was only when Natsu and Gray were arguing about who was going to be Bickslow's best man (Gray was trying to tell Natsu that he would probably pick Laxus, and Bickslow was just sitting there listening since he really wasn't going to say that he hadn't even started to think about it, considering they'd been engaged for less than twenty-four hours) did the last two people that Lucy and Bickslow really wanted to tell about their engagement finally show up.

As Laxus walked in, he instantly grimaced upon hearing the screech that could only come from the guild's resident Fire Dragon Slayer. But it was only when he paid attention to the actual words coming from his mouth did Laxus freeze, and he was more than glad that Mira had made a beeline for the bar – no doubt to go find her siblings – with Jax in her arms. She was completely oblivious to rowdier than usual table in the unruly guild hall, which meant she was unaware of the two people sitting right in the middle of that same table.

When Bickslow saw the blonde slayer quickly crossing the guild, just a small smirk on his face, he turned back down to Lucy beside him and whispered by her ear, "Sparky's coming."

Lucy looked away from Levy suddenly and quickly looked up at Laxus just as he reached the end of their overcrowded table. She smiled up at the other blonde before she impatiently swivelled on the bench slightly just to tap the Seith mage beside her, who could only roll her eyes at her. "Come on, let me out," she giggled. Sure, she could stand up on the bench and climb over the back of it, but that wouldn't exactly be very ladylike. Especially when she was wearing a skirt.

So she waited for Gajeel to slide out from the table, and then Bickslow, before she quickly did so herself and stood to greet the Dragon Slayer with a tight hug.

"You wanna explain why those two are talking about being Bicks' best man?" Laxus chuckled with an eyebrow raised at the blonde in front of him.

Lucy shrugged as she pulled back. "Probably because he's going to need one eventually," she replied, only quietly laughing at the completely shocked expression that crossed Laxus' face.

"You two are fuckin' engage?" Laxus asked when he looked down to the Seith mage taking a seat on the edge of the bench once again after Gajeel moved next to Levy.

Bickslow nodded. "As of last night."

"Huh. So that's where you disappeared to," Laxus muttered. He'd suspected that Bickslow had gone to talk to Lucy after he'd rushed out of the guild in the middle of the day – the same day that everyone knew to avoid him because he was brooding in the corner – straight after the rest of her team had gotten back. But, he'd expected him to go and talk to her, not to fucking propose. But, with those two, it was probably one in the same, and regardless, Laxus was more than happy for his best friend and someone he saw as a sister. "You two do realise Mira is gonna pass out once she knows, right?"

Lucy smiled as she let out a quiet sigh, and she slowly stepped back to slide along the bench just to let herself be pulled into Bickslow's lap once again. "We know," she laughed again as she leant back against his chest. Her head turned towards the bar where she was sure she'd seen the white-haired mage before, and she grinned back at Laxus and said, "So you might want to go and make sure she's not holding Jax, because I think Lisanna might be telling her now, actually."

And as if on cue, there was an ear-piercing squeal from the opposite side of the guild, and Laxus turned just in time to see his mate glance over to the table he was standing at and then fall to the ground just behind the bar. He could only roll his eyes and sigh in relief to see his sort-of sister-in-law holding his son, and confident that Mira would be fine (considering she passed out at least once a week, and she seemed fine after the hundreds, if not thousands of times she'd already done so), he heavily sat down at the end of the bench next to Bickslow and Lucy, who were, of course, sitting with matching grins.

"So are you two good now?" Laxus asked softly, ignoring the still bickering Dragon Slayer and Ice Make mage opposite him, and tuning out to the conversations that everyone else were having at the table.

"We've still got a lot of catching up to do, and just a few more things to talk about…" Bickslow smiled softly at his fiancée in his lap before he lightly kissed her cheek, then quietly, he answered, "But yeah, we're good now." And they were more than good, because everything in the world was amazing.

"You two still manage to make me want to throw up sometimes," Gajeel suddenly muttered.

Bickslow chuckled as he turned to his other side as Levy elbowed the slayer's side. "You know, Gajeel," he said, his grin never faltering. "I don't actually care if you wanna be sick, and it's because you're one of my best friends that I'm going to do this." And quickly, Bickslow lifted one of the arms he had wrapped around Lucy's waist just to hold her chin between his fingers and turn her face towards him, and he roughly pressed his lips to hers, his tongue instantly slipping past her lips and into her mouth in her surprise (and everyone else's surprise, for that matter).

It wasn't like they'd ever made a habit of being overly affectionate in the guild. Or at least, when they were in the _middle_ of it, surrounded by everyone. But right then? Yeah, Bickslow really didn't give a fuck, and neither did Lucy. They were both inclined to just believe they were making up for lost time… by making out in the middle of the guild.

"Alright. I'm done." Gajeel suddenly shot to his feet, only barely nudging the table and those next to him. He quickly stood and stepped over the back of the bench, and as he shook his head at the laughing mages, he lifted a hand just to wave to them before he slowly began to walk off. With just a slight smirk on his lips, he said, "Congrats and all, but I can't deal with the PDA. I need to go and find my damn cat."

* * *

Lucy's nose crinkled up slightly as she walked into Bickslow's apartment. The smell of bleach and god knows how many other cleaning supplies filled her nostrils and she was sure she got an instant headache as soon as she walked into the room. "Damn, Bicks," she laughed quietly as he closed the door behind them. "Ever heard of opening a window or something?" She was sure her eyes were beginning to burn with how strong it was, and as she looked around the dim apartment, she was almost positive she saw every single surface fucking _sparkle_.

Bickslow quickly crossed the room to walk into the kitchen part of his living space, and he reached over the sink to push open the window. "Sorry," he mumbled, walking back around the breakfast bar to push open the panes at the top of the window by the lounge. "I kind of stopped noticing it." After weeks of compulsive cleaning just to try and distract himself, the smell of bleach and various other citrus-scented surface cleansers was one he almost welcomed – even if he got an instant headache from being in his apartment for more than five minutes.

"When did you even start cleaning this much anyway?" Lucy asked as she slowly began to walk around the room. She hadn't been to Bickslow's apartment since she'd left for her grand adventure, not even when Bickslow had come back earlier that morning just to change before they met up again and went to the guild together.

Seeing everything the way it had been when she'd last been there had so many memories flooding back, and they were all good ones that had her smiling and reliving them in her head and her heart. The place had been her home for the better part of a year, even if she hadn't _officially_ moved in.

But still, with all the time she'd spent there, she didn't think she'd ever seen any surface in that place sparkle, not unless she'd been the one to clean it herself. It wasn't as if Bickslow was anything even close to being a slob, because he truly wasn't. He just wasn't exactly a compulsive cleaner, and if anything, Lucy was convinced she'd cleaned his apartment more than he had, but that was really only because her team tended to make a lot of mess, and she was left cleaning up after them.

"Um… Around the time I got back from Hargeon," he answered as a hand rubbed at the back of his neck. "I, um… I couldn't find you when I got back, because you were out on that job but I didn't know that until Laxus told me. It started out with just wanting to clean because I mean, everything was covered with dust since nothing had been touched in like a year, but then it turned into a distraction, and... Yeah… Became a compulsive cleaner, I suppose…"

Lucy turned away from the bookshelf as her lips turned down into a small frown, and she slowly padded over to where Bickslow was leaning against the end of the breakfast bar. "I'm sorry," she whispered as she lifted her arms to lace her hands together at the back of his neck.

Bickslow smiled down at Lucy softly as he lowered his head to rest his forehead on hers, and he slowly let his arms wrap around her waist as he quietly said, "It's okay. It doesn't matter anymore. I was just… I wasn't in the best place." Seeing the sorrow that suddenly set in her eyes made Bickslow realise he really should not be saying any of it. He wanted to try and make Lucy forget about the guilt from miscarrying, not make it worse. When he brings up that he wasn't in the best place and took to cleaning just to take his mind off things, he knew that it really wasn't helping. He sighed as he lifted his head, and he forced himself to smile once again. "Come on. It's getting late, and I still haven't heard about your year."

"Bed then?" Lucy laughed quietly, stepping back and instead letting his hand wrap around hers.

"Bed."

Bickslow slowly pulled Lucy down the short hall and to the end of it, pushing open the door and stepping into the dim room, only letting go of Lucy's hand just to go and switch on the lamps on each nightstand. He turned around again just to see her looking around at everything again with the smile he loved seeing so much – from the Seith magic book on the nightstand that was once hers, to the story on the wall above the bed, and to the small mementos they had around the room and the apartment that really made it a home.

She turned to look over her shoulder as she pulled open one of the drawers she knew to be hers, and as she saw Bickslow duck into the bathroom just to the side of the room, she called out, "Everything is still here?" All of her clothes, neatly folded and organised in the drawers that were hers, like she hadn't been gone for a year at all.

Bickslow came back out just as Lucy was pulling on dark purple tank top that went with the light grey cotton shorts she already had on (her preferred sleepwear when she wasn't wearing the shirt of Bickslow's she'd stolen long ago and was in her apartment anyway, and when clothes were actually involved), and he shrugged as he switched off the light in the bathroom and made his back over to the bed in his own pyjamas. "I couldn't really touch anything of yours," he finally answered. "Just felt weird moving any of it so I just left it. I did wash all of it about fifty times though. Just needed something to do when I couldn't sleep." And when he couldn't sleep, he drank and cleaned everything. And did a lot of washing, as it turns out. On the upside though, all of his clothes were basically all permanently cuddly soft and smelled like fucking summer, somehow.

"That's okay," Lucy sighed as she slowly climbed into bed and under the dark sheets and blanket that she realised smelled the exact same way her clothes did. She was sure as soon as her head hit the pillow she could've fallen asleep right then and there, and it really wasn't even that late. She was just comfortable as all hell, and she had really, _really_ missed the comfort Bickslow's bed gave her, especially when she was curled up right there beside her.

When he did finally climb into the bed from the other side, he quickly made his way to the centre of the large mattress, and his arms instantly wound around the blonde – one around her waist, and the other her shoulders – before he sighed against her neck. He loved that feeling, just having her in his arms and being able to hold her against him while their legs tangled up together. That was where he was home. It was where he was happiest, and it was where he always would be. It didn't really matter where it was – it was just with Lucy.

"So… About this moving thing…" Bickslow said slowly as they gently shifted to better positions, both of their heads resting on the pillows as they stayed in each other's arms.

"Just one quick question before we talk about that, though," Lucy said sweetly with a small smile.

Bickslow raised an eyebrow at the blonde, then drawled, "Okay…?"

"Can you maybe bring the babies out?" she asked quickly. "I mean, I haven't seen them since… Well, since I kind of made you fall off them in Hargeon. Which, I really didn't mean, by the way. I just haven't, you know, seen them for a while, and I missed them, and I just… I kinda want to cuddle with all all right now." It wasn't like they'd ever really actively cuddled with the little wooden dolls (or whatever physical body Bickslow put them in), but there were a few times where they had, or at least Lucy had.

But as Lucy rambled, she didn't notice the slow forming smirk on his lips, nor the five totems that were silently hovering in the air just behind her. She'd never really been able to tell when he was using that part of his magic, because once he'd stopped doing the gestures that went with it, there had been nothing to signal him moving the souls over into physical bodies, or into new ones once they got damaged or destroyed. Lucy knew the babies were always around Bickslow – constantly, actually. They were just rarely in the tikis that most people recognised them in, and unless they were in some form of physical body, Bickslow was the only one who could see them. Hearing them was a completely different issue, because even when they were invisible to anyone who wasn't a Seith mage, everyone could hear them.

And of course, it usually freaked the hell out of anyone who happened to hear them, only to look around and find nothing. Great for pranks (as Bickslow had explained on multiple times), but it definitely caused a lot of confusion when people would either see him talking to invisible… _somethings_ , or they'd think they were the voices inside their heads.

But when they were invisible and not in any of their physical bodies, it was really hard to cuddle with them, and that was all Lucy wanted to do. So when she felt them begin to gently nudge her neck and between her shoulders before they came up and over her, she began to giggle. "Hey, babies," she laughed when she looked up to see them begin to zoom around just above her like the little show-offs they were. "I missed you guys."

"Missed Lucy! Missed Lucy!" they all chanted happily, settling themselves around the pillows or nudging their way under the blankets to get between the two.

Lucy looked back up to Bickslow with a shocked smile. "Aww, they actually missed me?"

"Of course they did," he answered. He was convinced the babies loved Lucy as much as they loved him – if not more so – and knowing that Lucy loved them too was just another one of the many things he truly did love about her. So he just laid there for a moment, smiling at the love of his life giggling with his babies as they talked about just how much they'd missed the blonde, because the sight right in front of him was just another one he wouldn't get sick of seeing. "But… Going back to the moving thing now," he said softly once they'd settled down again and Lucy was only gently running her fingers across the doll's wings that was sitting just between them. "Did you want to move in here? Or..."

"Well…" She pulled her lip between her teeth when she met his garnet eyes, before she slowly said, "I was thinking… Maybe I move in here with you, and then after a little while, or after we're married… Or just whenever, really… We get our own place?" She paused for just a second when she saw the cogs in Bickslow's head slowly begin to piece together what she was trying to say, then, "You know, a bigger place," she said finally, pulling her lip between her teeth again.

She knew it probably wasn't exactly something they should be talking about right then, but she wanted to. That, and it really just seemed to lead on perfectly from moving in together.

Bickslow nodded thoughtfully. "A bigger place," he whispered to himself. He was sure he was getting what Lucy was trying to say, and just the thought of that actually being the case had Bickslow feeling like he could suddenly burst from being way too excited and happy… But, he needed to make sure. He needed to know, and he had to ask. "That's actually something else I wanted to talk to you about…"

Lucy already knew her answer, and she pretty confident she knew what Bickslow was going to say, but she wasn't going to answer the question before he could even ask it. That would just ruin the fun. "Mm-hmm," she hummed, smiling softly at the slightly nervous Seith mage before her.

"Okay, so… I know it's not something we ever talked about seriously, or at all, really. And I know it's probably not something we should be talking about just yet anyway, considering we _just_ got back together and all… But… I want to talk about it now, you know? And I know you know what _it_ is, so if you don't want to have this conversation right now, or at all, I'd totally understand."

"Bicks, you're rambling."

"I am, aren't I?" he sighed, gently lifting a hand to rub across his brow.

"Just a little bit," she laughed quietly.

Bickslow took a steadying breath to calm his nerves as he moved his hand back down to her waist and opened his eyes again. He was sure it shouldn't be a painful conversation, but he couldn't help but feel like it would be. So Bickslow did his best to put the daunting thoughts about what Lucy's answer would be to the back of his mind, and instead focused on the patient smile she held, and remained hopeful.

"Earlier today, once Mira had woken up again and you know, started squealing and all that like she usually does… You said something, and it… It made me wonder if you meant it, or you just said it to get her to drop the subject. Which, I totally understand and I get it. I do."

"You mean when she started going on about blue-haired and brown-eyed, and blonde-haired and red-eyed babies and all that? And she asked when it was going to happen?" Lucy asked softly.

Bickslow nodded, his bottom lip between his teeth again. All he wanted to do was cave and change the subject, but he couldn't. He knew that. The fact that the hair and eye combinations didn't even scratch the surface of what could happen was irrelevant - it was something he hadn't ever explained to Lucy though, because he'd never thought them having kids would be in their near future at the time, so he hadn't found it necessary to tell her the things she would need to know about how their magic (or his, more importantly) had a big impact on a lot of things… Like eyes, for example. It was strange, but it needed to be explained. That just wasn't going to be that night.

"Yeah, and you just said it would be one day," Bickslow replied. Either she could have meant it, she hadn't even begun to think about it again, or she just wanted to avoid saying no to Mira, just because she didn't want to explain it. The problem was that Bickslow didn't know, and he really did need to know. So after waiting for any small sign from Lucy and instead getting nothing but the smile that hadn't faltered for even a second, he finally asked, "Did you mean it? I mean… Do you… Do you still want to have kids?"

 _Ah, and he finally asks._ "Do you?" Lucy answered with her own question.

"I-I… Wait, what?" Bickslow spluttered, his brows drawing together and creasing the mark across the bridge of his nose.

"Do _you_ still want kids one day?" she asked slowly.

Bickslow was almost at a loss for words as he just stared at the bright smile on his fiancée's face. _Why is she asking me if I want kids?_ "It's not about me, Lucy," he said quickly, trying to turn it back around. "This is about you, 'cause I mean, if you don't want kids anymore because you miscarried before, then I get it. I'll still support you with whatever you want to do, you know that. I just… I just wanted to ask and make sure we're on the same page with this."

Lucy sighed as her eyes flicked down to the little, quietly purring (strangely, since Lucy had never really figured out how they did that) soul nestled just on her chest, before she gently pushed it up so it could settle itself with the other four that were scattered around them on the pillows. "Bickslow," she said softly as she lifted her eyes again to meet the ones that she could see were filled with worry, and she smiled again. "I think I need to tell you some things."

Bickslow could feel his heart sinking and breaking just that tiny little bit at her words. _Take that as a no then…_ And really, he did understand if Lucy didn't want to have children anymore. After losing a baby, he didn't blame her if she was scared of it happening again. He was too, if he thought about it, and when he thought about how scary that thought was for him, he remembered just how scary and devastating it must have for Lucy when it had happened; when she'd been alone and she hadn't had anyone to help her through it.

But even though Bickslow couldn't think of anything nicer than to have kids one day with the woman in front of him, he would accept it if Lucy didn't want that. He wouldn't lie and say that that didn't hurt, because it did. It honestly hurt like hell for Bickslow to even think about the future where they wouldn't be actually starting their own family, and even more so to know that it had been so close once upon a time. But… Bickslow would accept it, if that was really the case. If Lucy didn't want to try and get pregnant again, then that was that. He wasn't going to press the matter, not after what she'd been through, and no matter what, he would remain by her side because that was where he belonged.

But maybe… Just maybe… One day, if Lucy really didn't want to have kids of her own after miscarrying, they could adopt. Maybe somewhere down the track, they'd decide that they still wanted to have a family, and even if the child wasn't really theirs, they would still love them and call them their own. Bickslow liked to think that that would be an option in their future together, if she really didn't want to have kids. Regardless though, he wasn't going to press the issue, because for now – and for an incredibly long time – he was fine with just Lucy. As long as he had Lucy, he was okay. Forever and always.

"It's okay if you don't want to have kids," Bickslow whispered, doing his best to hide the sadness in his voice. Though he knew his eyes gave it away, like they always did. "You don't have to explain it. I get it, I do. You can just say no."

Lucy shook her head as she lifted a hand to slowly begin to thread her fingers through the shorter strands of hair on the side (though she did barely register that they were in fact shorter than she remembered them to be) and gently push them back. She wasn't going to do that – say no – because she didn't want to. She had no reason to say no, but she also wasn't going to straight out say yes, either. Sure, she probably should, because she could see that Bickslow already thought she'd answered his question, but she wasn't going to. She needed to make him understand that after everything that had happened, she still wanted kids.

She knew that to make him see that, she'd have to remind him of some things he probably didn't want to remember, but she also knew it would be worth it, just because she'd get to see that look of surprise and joy on his face when he managed to wrap his head around everything.

"Do you remember what you said to me the day you left?" she finally asked, her fingers still running through the thick tufts of hair.

"Lucy… Please don't go there…" The truth was that he remembered exactly what he'd said to Lucy on that day. Almost word for word. It had hurt him to say it then, and it hurt him to even hear them echo in his head, reminding him of what he'd done and given up on. "Please…"

Hearing Bickslow almost begging her not to go on with it had Lucy on the verge of just stopping right there, instead just wrapping her arms around him and giving him the straight truth like she knew she probably should have done in the first place. But, she wouldn't. She'd started, and she wasn't going to stop then, even though she knew it would be painful. Just for a little while. "Do you remember when you told me to find a guy that wasn't a total moron and didn't have a kickass mohawk?"

The corner of his mouth lifted up in a small smirk, and he nodded slowly.

"And do you remember when you told me to settle down somewhere, fall in love with them, have kids and have a family?" Lucy could see all of that guilt and all of that regret come back to the surface, and the smirk was instantly wiped off his face. She really was hating that she was doing that, but he needed to see. So when he nodded again after a moment's hesitation, his eyes no longer looking into her own, she whispered, "I didn't want to do any of that. I know that you wanted me to, because you wanted me to be happy and move on, but… I wouldn't have been able to do that. I wouldn't have been able to have a family one day, because I just didn't want to."

"Lucy, you know I wouldn't have said any of that though if I'd known how… How close we had been to having a family. I wouldn't have said any of it… Or done any of it…"

"I know, baby. I know," she sighed as a soft smile set on her lips. "But… Do you know why I didn't want to have a family one day after all of that?"

"… Because of the baby," he mumbled.

"Nope." The sudden confusion on his face had Lucy letting out a quiet laugh. "Well, a little, but it's really not what you think," she said quickly. Losing the baby had played a part in her deciding she couldn't and wouldn't ever have a family with someone one day, but it wasn't the only reason. That was what she needed Bickslow to see. But… Not yet.

He only blinked back at her, his brow creased in confusion as he tried to understand how he could have been wrong. Well, sort of wrong. "I don't… I don't understand… What?"

Lucy only smiled again as she swiftly managed to roll Bickslow onto his back, pulling herself up as his arms fell back to the bed so she could sit over his hips. He always said she was adorable when she was confused, but she was convinced that Bickslow won the grand prize when it came to that.

Keeping her eyes locked with his, her fingers lightly traced over the faded scar that curved across his side and stomach, and she slowly said, "Do you remember the day you got this?"

"I try not to… You know, considering the whole thing where I almost died…"

"Do you remember what I said though? When I told you you couldn't leave because I basically told you that I wanted to have kids with you some day?"

"And I basically freaked the fuck out because you joked about it that same morning," he chuckled.

Lucy nodded when she saw the pain his eyes disappear beneath the surface again, and her her smile could only get brighter. She knew that the pain was still there for Bickslow, and she didn't expect it to go away any time soon, just because she'd always known he had a hard time forgiving himself for anything, especially when it came to things involving herself. But that was okay. Like she had the last time things had gotten bad for Bickslow and his guilt got close to getting the better of him, she would help him. She would help him see the good in things and remind him of everything he'd done that made it all okay.

She'd remind him that she would always forgive him, even when she really didn't have anything to forgive him for.

But just seeing that guilt that she knew was completely destroying him on the inside, and had been for a long, long time, disappear beneath the surface and be masked by his happiness, it had Lucy remembering just why she was doing what she doing. She was helping him see everything in a way that she knew would make sense and make him see it all clearly. A trip down memory lane was just the perfect way to do that.

"And do you remember when you decided to be the best boyfriend ever and give me that amazing – though extremely weird – massage or wh—"

"Weird didn't seem to stop you from letting me do it every other fucking month," Bickslow laughed, only to get a few fingers dug into his side from the blushing blonde above him just to get him to stop laughing. "But I remember," he said quietly. "Because I told you that I wanted to have kids with you one day."

"So…" Lucy began slowly, her eyes still locked with Bickslow's. "Do you want to know why I didn't want a family after you left?"

Bickslow shrugged when his gaze flicked elsewhere, down to the bandages that were peeking out from beneath her shirt around her waist, and the thinner one around her thigh still. "Kinda," he mumbled. He was sure it was going to hurt, he was also sure there was a reason Lucy had decided to take them on a trip down the rocky memory lane to all the times having children together had ever been brought up.

"Because I didn't want to have a family with anyone else but you."

He could only blink at her once again as he stared up at the never-fading smile on her lips. "You… Huh?"

Lucy sighed as she began to lightly trace over his tattoo, her fingers memorising the path of the cursive font in the centre of the key, and for just a moment, her smile faltered. "You know… When I found out I was pregnant, I was really, _really_ happy," she whispered, her brown eyes showing just a hint of the sorrow that still lurked within as she kept them down. "I know it wasn't planned and that it was a surprise, but I was still happy. I was so excited to tell you that we were going to have a family, and even though it would have been a lot earlier than what either of us thought it would ever be, I really hoped that you'd be as glad as I was."

"I would have been," Bickslow said quietly. "I would have been over the fucking moon."

Lucy smiled again as she lifted a hand just to tuck a strand of her long hair behind her ear. "But then everything happened, and I know that it wasn't really my fault and it just happens sometimes… And… Well, you know all of that already," she mumbled. "But then when I did kind of start dating again…" Lucy paused when that uncomfortable feeling in the pit of her stomach grew again. She knew that Bickslow already knew she'd been on a few really terrible dates with a few other guys in the year they'd been separated, and that Bickslow was no longer the only man she'd been with, but even if he did know and he said he didn't care – after all, they had been broken up, and he'd told her than she should move on and all of that – it still felt weird to talk about it at all.

But… She knew she had to. She had to just get it over and done with so they could move past it and everything was explained. Taking a steadying breath to try and ease her worries and discomfort a little bit, she softly continued, "When I did start dating again, I knew that even if I did eventually fall in love with someone, though it would never be as much as I love you, I wouldn't want kids. I had accepted that I would never have children with anyone, because I just didn't want to have them with anyone that wasn't you."

"So… Does that mean…"

"It means that I still really want to have kids," she giggled at the far too adorable expression on his face, then, leaning down just so she could take his face between her small hands, she said softly, "With you, and only ever you."

It was only then did Bickslow's face completely drop, and instead of staring up at the grinning face of his fiancée with his own matching grin, he could only raise an eyebrow as his mouth set in a firm line. "And you didn't think to, I don't know… Maybe _start_ with that?" he said. "I mean, instead of having me lying here on my back as you decide to take a trip down dreary-as-hell memory lane, make it seem like you really don't want kids anymore? You know, making me worry and pretend that I'm actually totally fine with it all because even when I really fucking love you and I would still be here if you did decide you didn't want kids, it would still suck. But I'd get it. I just… I really, _really_ want kids. You know, one day."

"… Wow."

Bickslow groaned as he lifted a hand just to cover his face with it. "Sorry," he mumbled, his fingers spreading over his eyes slightly just to peek through them and up to Lucy. "I don't… I don't really know where that came from." And he really didn't. He rarely had outbursts like that, and right then, Bickslow was sure it had been a terrible time for one.

"No, it's okay," Lucy said quietly as her brows slowly drew together. "I just… I always thought you were kind of impartial when it came to the whole kids thing… Like, I just… I really didn't think you were that into it."

She had always hoped that Bickslow would truly be excited when it was time for them to actually have a family – and she knew now that Bickslow would actually be excited – and she had known that he'd said on a few occasions that he wanted kids, or least wouldn't mind them, but… She'd always thought it was something he just wouldn't mind all that much about if it didn't happen. But maybe it was because Lucy had always known that Bickslow hadn't ever really been particularly fond of children as it was that she thought that. Of course, he'd said that their own kids would be a different story entirely, but still…

Lucy couldn't help but find it all confusing now. If Bickslow really did feel that way about having kids, then it really was amazing, because part of Lucy couldn't wait to start actually trying to have their own family. It was just that Bickslow had surprised her. In a good way, of course.

So as Lucy slid off to lie on her side again, Bickslow rolled with her and they quickly went back to having their legs barely tangled together in amongst the sheets. "Why wouldn't I be?" Bickslow said softly as he reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear once again.

"I don't know…" Lucy shrugged slightly as she settled her head back on the pillow next to Bickslow's. "I guess I just didn't think you thought so strongly about it… Like, if we didn't end up having kids. I mean, I know you've never liked children much…"

Bickslow smiled when her eyes flicked back up, and his thumb only gently brushed across her cheek. Oh, how the conversation had turned around, but Bickslow didn't mind at all. "I used to hate kids, but… I also used to hate the idea of settling down and having any form of relationship," he said truthfully. "But then I fell in love with you and I realised that I wanted to do all of what I hated. Well… Eventually."

"So, what?" Lucy whispered, her eyes slowly lighting up again as her lips twitched with the urge to smile. "You suddenly don't hate kids anymore?" Sure, it was entirely possible, considering the last time they'd talked about kids they'd only been dating for five and a bit months…

A lot of things can change in just six months. She knew that much.

"Well, I don't hate them. I don't exactly love them either though," Bickslow mumbled as his hand dropped down to her waist under the covers again. "I just… I grew up. Surprisingly. And I mean, when we'd only been together for a few months, it wasn't exactly something I'd even thought about, but then you brought it up when I was kind of dying—"

"You weren't dying."

Bickslow frowned, and for a brief moment, he was completely serious when he quietly said, "I was, and I should have died and you know it. I was lucky that day. Very lucky." Of course, Bickslow never did forget just how lucky he was, because he was sure as hell glad he hadn't died that day. "But… I never told you about what I saw when I was asleep that entire week," he continued.

It had taken a little while for Bickslow remember what he'd seen when he'd thought he had actually died. He didn't remember it straight away, but over the weeks that followed, he slowly remembered the dream that he'd had, because they came in bits and pieces in other dreams. Bickslow never told Lucy any of that though, because he just didn't think it would have been the best idea. After all, it had only been a dream, but still, it had helped Bickslow realise just how much he wanted all of what he'd seen.

And now? Well, now it seemed like a good idea. It was still probably going to be a little weird, talking about a damn dream he'd had more than a year ago (he hadn't been able to forget it once it had all come back for whatever reason), but it was okay.

So when it was Lucy who was the adorable and confused one, Bickslow's mouth pulled up into an even wider grin. "I had this like, really strange dream," he began. "I didn't remember it straight away when I woke up, but for some reason, it all came back in bits of pieces."

"What was this dream about?"

"Well, it was about us."

Lucy blinked. "Us?" she whispered.

He nodded slowly. "Yeah. Us," he smiled. "But, it was really strange, because at first, it was just me. Like, it was my entire life, so I guess it kind of made me feel like that I really had died, because I saw everything all again and it felt like I was reliving it all." He paused when he could see Lucy trying to understand it already, and when he was sure she was about to ask just where he was going with it, he continued, "And I saw the date I met you, and when I asked you out and when I kissed you. And that was where it got weird, because there was nothing else after that."

"… I don't… I don't understand?" Lucy mumbled, her neat brows drawing together once again.

"Like I said, it was strange," Bickslow sighed. "But I remember there being a moment in the dream where there was just nothing. It was just, empty, almost. And then I was suddenly watching myself. Well, I was watching us, actually. I remember this one part of it… I was standing there in a park, or a field, or something like that, and I turned around to see myself running around after you, and we were both laughing and having fun. And then, you know, I end up catching up and I pull you down onto the ground with me."

"And then what happens?"

"Then… I turned again, and I saw these two kids running up to us," he said slowly, his grin only getting wider when he saw the corner of Lucy's lips slowly pulling up into a soft smile. "So then I stood there and watched us all just laugh and have fun, and I realised that it was our family. I mean, I know that it was just a dream and all, but I still felt like that I had actually died and I was just somehow seeing what I was going to be missing out on. Because I wouldn't be there."

Even though Lucy could see that it was putting Bickslow in pain to talk about what he'd seen in his dream that he'd thought had been his entire life and the life he was missing out on, she was still smiling. Because she could see that even though Bickslow was in pain, he was still happy. But even if it was just a dream, to know that Bickslow had pictured them having an actual family, it had her heart warming and tears forming in the corners of her eyes, just because it made her happy.

"Did you see anything else?" Lucy asked as she propped herself up on an elbow on the pillow.

Bickslow nodded. "A few other things. It went backwards from there though. I think… I think the next part was just after you'd had a baby, and I was sitting there next to you, with like half of the guild around us, and I was holding our baby."

"Boy or girl?"

"I don't know, to be honest. In my dream, there was one of each, but I couldn't tell who was the eldest, and with the baby, I just had no idea," he answered. "But… We just both looked so happy. _I_ looked happy. And then it just kept going backwards, and for the most part I could remember just seeing glimpses and pieces of what happened in that life – in my dream, at least – but there were some parts I actually saw."

"Like…?" Lucy drawled.

"Like… Me asking you to marry me in Cartervale, and of course, you saying yes…"

But then, when Bickslow's grin faded once again and he only barely twisted to look up at the ceiling in the dim room, Lucy's own faltered and she was worrying once again. "Bickslow?" she said softly, laying her hand on his chest as she sat up slightly. "What is it?"

"There was just…" He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth when he suddenly wondered if he should tell her the rest of it. If the fact that he'd thought his dream was his entire life and the life he was missing out on just happening because he was dying wasn't strange enough, then the rest of it definitely was. It was silly, really, but he couldn't help but feel a little anxious about it all.

But… No matter how anxious he was, and no matter how worried he was about Lucy thinking he was even more insane than he already was, he knew he had to tell her. There had never really been any secrets between them, and even when there was, they never stayed hidden from each other for very long. They told each other everything, no matter how stupid. Right then was no different.

As Bickslow let out a sigh, he lifted a hand to push it back through his hair, and lifted his head just enough to rest it on his hand on the pillow, before he finally continued, "The last part of my dream was us just lying in bed. Asleep. And even though it was really simple, just… Just seeing something like that made me realise just how much I was going to miss you, because I still thought that that was for the end for me. Even though I know it was just a dream, I realised that I was going to miss all of it. All of what I saw with you, I would miss, but… But I accepted that that was it. I wasn't going to get any of what I saw in that dream, and then I just had to turn around and leave it all behind because I'd have no choice."

Lucy's hand slowly lifted and she lightly turned Bickslow's head to look back to her, her fingers barely resting against the side of his jaw. She could see the worry in his eyes, and Lucy really didn't like that. Not one bit. Because right then, she knew it was because there was something else to all of what Bickslow was telling her, and she wanted to know why.

"Why are you telling me all of this now?" she asked softly, watching as Bickslow's eyes avoided actually looking at her.

"Because… Because part of me feels like it wasn't actually a dream," Bickslow answered after a moment's hesitation. "And I know that doesn't really answer just why I'm telling you all of this, but… I think it kind of does."

"What do you mean?"

"You told me that when I was in a coma for that, that I should have woken up after just a few days at most, but I didn't. And I mean, I didn't remember any of what I saw when I was asleep when I actually woke up, so at first, I thought it really was just a dream…" He paused again when he had to remind himself that telling Lucy everything was the right thing. She'd explained everything to him, and now it was his turn to do the same. Rolling completely onto his back and pulling his legs free from hers, he looked up to the ceiling with another sigh before continuing, "But once it all came back in bits and pieces after a little while, I began to wonder if it really had been just a dream. You're not supposed to remember dreams in almost perfect detail, but I could. And, you know, sometimes I wonder if I woke up when I probably shouldn't have, just because I saw the life that I wanted to have and thought I was going to be missing out on."

Lucy blinked back in surprise for a moment when she sat up suddenly. She was smart, and it didn't take her long to understand what he was trying to say. And, if she was perfectly honest, it did make a little bit of sense. "So you think that you pulled through just because of what you saw?" she asked, a smile on her face as she did so.

Bickslow nodded as his eyes quickly flicked up to Lucy. "I know it's stupid, but—"

"I don't think it's stupid."

"You don't?"

Lucy shook her head as her smile got brighter, and leaning back down to rest on her elbow, she slowly began, "I think you seeing what you did gave you a reason to fight it. I think… I think you seeing a future you wanted helped you push through and come back to me so you could get that future one day." She could see the relief instantly wash over him, and even though he was only just telling her now about something that had been bothering him (at least a little bit) for a long time, she was still glad.

It didn't matter to Lucy that if she thought about it logically, it really probably wasn't the reason he'd woken up. He'd been asleep longer than anyone expected him to be, but he'd still be healing and his health had been improving with each day. But, maybe, just maybe, Bickslow had been closer to death than anyone did ever realise. Maybe the entire time, he'd been right on the verge of dying and what he'd seen had never just been a dream. Maybe him seeing his life and the life he could've lived had actually helped him pull through that last little bit. Maybe it had actually helped him finally wake.

Lucy really did want to believe that Bickslow seeing them have a family in a future was enough for Bickslow to fight back against it all. Maybe, even though he'd accepted his death at the time, him not being able to let go was what had him waking up in the first place. Maybe it was because he didn't want to leave everything behind just yet. Lucy didn't know, but she wanted to believe in all of that. Because that? That, she loved.

So as she laid down beside him again, her arm draped over him and her face right next to his, she softly asked, "Is that why you want kids?"

Bickslow nodded when he finally turned his head to face her. "Once I remembered seeing us as a family, I realised that it was what I really wanted," he answered. "But, until I did remember what it was I saw, I still didn't really mind if we ever had kids or not. Once you brought it up though, I did think about it, but not a lot. But when I told you that I wanted kids one day, I really did mean it, but I still wasn't really set on having them, you know?"

"I get it," Lucy smiled. "I mean, we hadn't really been together for very long then, so I can understand you not thinking much about the future. I knew what kind of person you were when I started dating you, and I knew right from the beginning that you didn't think about those kinds of things. But now…"

"But now…"

"Now, a lot of things have changed. You've changed a lot, and so have I…" Lucy said slowly. "And now..."

The corner of his mouth pulled up into a slight smile as he moved his hand from behind his head, just to lightly cup her cheek. "Now," he began. "I'm thinking about our future together, and I know that I want us to have a family. More than anything." And when he saw the sheer happiness on her face behind her watery eyes, he leant forward just that little bit and tenderly pressed their lips together. With his forehead resting against hers when they barely pulled apart, he whispered, "And… When you're ready to start trying, I'll be ready too."

In truth, knowing that Lucy still wanted to have a family one day had Bickslow almost wishing they could start working on it right then. He couldn't wait to finally have kids with her, but he knew he would have to wait, at least a little while. Just knowing that right then, if things hadn't happened the way they did, they could have already been a family had Bickslow so anxiously awaiting the day that they could actually start trying.

But even Bickslow knew it was far too early to be trying to start their family, especially when they'd just gotten back together and were still trying to catch up with each other. Right then, they didn't need to stress of actually trying to have a baby when Lucy would be in the middle of moving houses, and then they'd have a wedding to plan. Besides, Bickslow was sure that Lucy wasn't even ready for that just yet anyway, not when she was still coping with the loss of the first.

But no matter what, they had other things to deal with first. Like… Catching up. So as his lips pulled up into a wide grin as he let out a quiet chuckle, his arm wrapped around her waist again as he pushed her back onto her side so he was leaning over her slightly. "Now… I believe we got off topic. In a good way, of course, because, I mean, I don't even think I need to tell you how glad it makes me that you still want to have kids one day… But, right now, I really just want to hear about those terrible boyfriends of yours and what you got up to."

Lucy rolled her eyes. "They weren't my boyfriends," she laughed.

"So… Fuck buddies?"

"O-Oh my god, no!" she shrieked, her cheeks quickly becoming a flattering shade of red as she stared incredulously at the cackling Seith mage with his head thrown back into the pillow. It was almost as if she had more of a problem with the fact she'd slept with other people than he did – regardless of the fact they'd been broken up and Bickslow had most likely been with any number of people in that year. And still, even if the guys she'd been with hadn't been her boyfriends, they sure as hell had no been her _fuck buddies_. "They were… Just…"

"I was kidding, Cosplayer," Bickslow laughed, his tongue hanging from his mouth with his wide grin in place. "Now, tell me everything."

And so Lucy did; she told Bickslow about absolutely everything that had happened in their year apart. She told him about how she travelled around Fiore for a little bit, taking on just a few small jobs in her travels. She told him about getting a job at Sorcerer Weekly (and of course, just how much she'd hated the fact she'd started out as a model, though Bickslow really didn't mind Lucy having been a model… Even if what had gone with it really sucked), and then how she ended up finally get a job where she actually got to write for a living.

She told him about settling down in a new house in Crocus after she got her new job, and she told him about how her co-workers had constantly told her she needed to get back out into the world of dating. Every single terrible date she'd been on, just to get her co-workers who weren't quite her friends to leave her the hell alone, and all about her near non-existent sex life (of course, Bickslow took great pleasure in hearing that no one else got to have the honour of hearing her screams, which is precisely why Lucy told him all of it – though not the details).

She told him how she kept tabs on everyone as best she could, which Bickslow thought was sweet, and how she kept in touch with Laxus and Mira the entire time, as well as Levy and a few others from the guild. It was only then did Bickslow finally tell Lucy that Laxus had been giving him just enough information about how she was doing to keep him from fretting and worrying about her more than he already was, and that, Lucy found sweet. Even when he'd had no idea where she was or what she was really doing, he had still been doing his best to make sure she was okay.

She told him everything, and Bickslow listened to every single word, just because it felt so nice to finally know what she'd been doing when they'd been apart. It filled in the gaps for him, and it almost made it feel like they hadn't just gotten back together just the day before, and that for the entire time, they'd had some sort of contact.

But when Lucy told Bickslow about how she was one of the reporters for that year's games, and how every day, she'd walked the same streets he had and sat on just on the opposite side of the arena to his team, he stopped smiling. Finally. They'd been in the same town, and he hadn't known. Neither had she, and so when Bickslow told her that his team had gone to Crocus just to watch the games and relax a little between the gruelling freelance jobs they got, she'd been more than a little shocked.

Once they'd both gotten over the initial shock though, it made the storytelling just that little bit more fun, because when she laughed with Bickslow about Natsu suddenly storming in and completely destroying the arena, it really did make it feel like they'd been there together. They'd been there, together yet not together, and they hadn't even known it.

Of course, once Lucy had brought up that the heat from Natsu's flames had quite literally melted half the clothes off her body… Well, Bickslow didn't take that one too well. Partly because a whole heap of people would have seen her topless, and he hadn't. What could he say? He was still a perv.

"… And then I was on a train out of Crocus that night with Natsu, and we were on our way to get everyone else back to Magnolia," she said tiredly, though with a smile on her face.

"Sounds like you had a good year then," Bickslow said softly, only getting a hum from the blonde as her eyes struggled to stay open. Even though it was just a little past midnight, they'd both had a long day and were more than ready to finally retire for the night in each other's arms. "I wish I'd have run into you or something while we were in Crocus though. Would've been nice."

"Yeah, it would have," Lucy agreed. Even though there had only been a few weeks between the Grand Magic Games ending and them finally seeing each other again, she couldn't help but wonder if things would still have turned out the way they were then if they'd seen each other in Crocus. Of course, to Lucy, she couldn't help but find it a little amusing that in a city so large, she'd run into his sisters of all people, but not Bickslow. So as her eyes slowly opened again, her lips pulled up into an even brighter smile, and she slowly began, "But speaking of running into people… Guess who I saw in Crocus."

A sigh escaped Bickslow as he sat up to prop his head up in his hand with his elbow on the mattress, and he shrugged. There was no way he was actually going to guess, because if that were the case, he could be up for hours just trying to figure out who the mystery person that Lucy saw in Crocus was. "Who?"

"Your sisters."

Bickslow's eyes went wide as he stared at Lucy in complete shock. Suddenly he wasn't feeling all that tired. "What? When? How?" he asked quickly. He'd barely told her anything about his sisters, not even their names or showed her a single photo (because he just didn't have them to show her). He just didn't understand how Lucy could have met them.

"It was on the last day of the games," Lucy said. "I had a bit of time before I had to go down to the Domus Flau, so I went through the markets that had opened up for the games, since I didn't really get a chance to do so on every other day. So, as I was walking, I saw this one stand with—"

"Snowglobes," Bickslow finished for Lucy, watching as confusion quickly etched on her face. "I know, I was there. I saw them on the last day right before the games started too."

"You did?" He nodded as a slow smile crept onto his mouth, and as Lucy's exhaustion slowly disappeared, she quickly went on, "Uh, anyway… I was… I was looking at them, because I saw this one with Kardia Cathedral in it and I thought it was really pretty, but then they recognised me somehow. And at first I didn't really know what was going on, but then they said they had a brother in Fairy Tail and then said it was you, I kind of pieced it all together and realised that was why they looked so familiar."

Bickslow rolled his eyes, and mumbled, "They read too much of the Sorcerer. That's how they would have recognised you, because they gave me so much shit about leaving once they saw me." It was then that Bickslow realised that Lucy had said she'd seen them on the last day, right before that day's events started, and that Bickslow had remembered hearing her laugh right before his sisters had recognised him. Maybe… Just maybe… He hadn't been imagining it. "Hey, so… You said you saw them on the last day, right?"

Lucy nodded. "I only got to talk with them for a few minutes before I had to go though."

"Right, well, I know it's a bit of a weird question…"

"Most of your questions are weird, Bicks."

The corner of his mouth briefly lifted up and showed just a quick smirk, before he continued, "True, but… Did you… Laugh? I mean, you know I love your laugh, and I know it anywhere now, but… I swear I heard it that day, and now that I think about it, it was almost right before they saw me and I went and talked to them."

"You know, I think I might have, actually…" She quickly tried to remember the conversation she'd had, and as she did so, she suddenly began to giggle just with the mental picture appearing in her head once again. "Oh, yeah," she laughed. "I asked if you always did that thing with your tongue when you talk, and then they told me about how you got it stuck to a pole when you were sixteen."

If Bickslow could care about how he was sure that story had was taken out of context (he wasn't being an idiot; it had been a dare, from his evil sisters), he would have. Instead, he was far too focused on the fact that they really had been closer than they'd thought. He'd been close enough to hear her laugh in a sea of people, and he'd put it down to his imagination. She'd been right there, with his only living family left, and neither of them had had any idea.

Of course, Bickslow was just a little confused by the fact that his sisters had obviously just run into his ex (and technically, future fiancée) barely minutes before they'd seen him, and yet they hadn't said a single thing. They'd talked to Lucy, yet they hadn't told him. Instead, they'd decided to keep their mouths shut and let Bickslow think she was on the opposite side of the country or something, all while giving him hell for letting her go when he shouldn't have.

But… He wasn't going to let that go. Oh no. He'd been meaning to go and visit them anyway, just because he had nephews and a niece to go and meet, and two sisters to catch up with just because they really were his only living family, but with everything with the guild coming back, it had been pushed back. Now though? Now, he'd be able to take Lucy with him, and he'd be able to tell them that he was definitely not letting her go again, all while giving _them_ hell for not telling him about meeting her in the first place.

Yeah, Bickslow was going to have a _lot_ of fun with that.

* * *

 **So obviously, the second part was superrrrrrrr long as it was. Sorry about that. Kind of had to be done because there was a lot I couldn't put in the last chapter, and everything seemed to just flow into the same conversation.**

 **I know I updated How I Met You today too, and I did want to wait a couple of days before getting this updated, but I couldn't help myself. I never can, really, and I spent a lot longer on this chapter anyway. So yeah, two updates in one day. Whoops.**

 **As always, though, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter!**

 **Until next time.**

 **\- April**

 _P.S - Yes, Stargazing and this feature the same 'dream' that was also in Chapter 33 of this story. That's because it is an alternate ending of sorts, like I said in Stargazing. :D_


	46. Chapter 46

_**So I know this chapter is a little shorter than what I've been getting out lately, but it's also just a bit of a filler (sort of). Not to mention, I prefer writing chapters this length too.**_

 _ **I'm realising that updates on this are getting incredibly slow (about a month apart at this point), but it's getting like that with all of my stories too, and there's not much I can do about it. I wish I could get more chapters out more often, but I am working on a lot of stories at the moment and even though this story is and always will be my baby (yes... Don't judge me), it's not getting the most love at the moment.**_

 _ **Anyway. I still hope you enjoy this chapter, and can forgive me for not getting much out lately! And, of course, there will be more notes at the bottom.**_

* * *

"Bicks… Come on," Lucy whined as she nudged the Seith mage awake. "It's already eleven. Time to get up."

Bickslow smiled into the pillow as he felt her eternally cold feet pressing all down his spine, then his thighs, and his ass just for good measure. Annoying as it was that Lucy's preferred method of waking him from his slumber when she was bored of being the only one awake until noon, he loved it.

Well, it wasn't really so much that he loved his girlfriend – no, fiancée – pressing her feet into his back and not so gently nudging him awake; it was that he loved her being there. That was the first time in over a year since he'd woken up in that bed with Lucy there beside him, and as simple as it was, Bickslow absolutely adored it.

"Not yet," he mumbled. If he could just stay in bed for the rest of the day with Lucy, he would. He couldn't think of anything else they needed to do that day. They'd got the entire guild and announcement thing done the day before, so a day in bed or on the lounge was much needed. Just one day where it was them and no one else.

Lucy sighed as she picked up one of the spare pillows against the headboard, and she brought it down on the side of Bickslow's head with a quiet laugh that sounded at the same time as his surprised grunt. "Right now," she insisted with another laugh.

"But I have no reason to get up today."

"Yes you do."

He peeked an eye open suddenly as he tried to remember if he really did have a reason to get up and be somewhat close to productive, and as he felt Lucy's bare chest pressed up against his back and her chin coming to rest over his shoulder, Bickslow remembered the reason for getting up. He was suddenly feeling full of energy and a wide grin split his mouth. "Oh, right!" he suddenly exclaimed.

Quickly, he slid out from under Lucy as he untangled himself from the black sheets, and he stood just as he looked around the room for the nearest form of clothing. At some point in the night after they'd talked about Lucy being in Crocus and everything, their clothes had been lost and scattered around their bedroom floor. Granted, it wasn't that surprising in reality, he'd woken up in that bed with Lucy and without clothes more times than they had _with_ clothes. So pulling on a random pair of boxer briefs from a drawer, he quickly exited the room and headed towards the bookcase that took up the far wall of his living area.

It was as they'd laid in bed before they'd fallen asleep, sated and blissfully content with everything, did they have a slightly strange conversation. Knowing that they both definitely wanted to have kids together one day, and hopefully reasonably soon, they'd been able to seriously talk about it. Or as serious as they could get, at least.

They'd decided that they'd have at least two kids, if things turned out. Lucy knew what it was like to grow up an only child and to live an incredibly lonely life, and Bickslow had been always been the youngest in his family having two older sisters. They didn't want their kids to grow up alone, but they also didn't want them to grow up and ever feel like they weren't really as wanted or loved as a sibling. Even if it would never be the case, Bickslow had, as a child, always suspected his parents might have loved his sisters just a little bit more than they had him, but he'd grow up and realised it was a childish thought. It had taken Bickslow thinking about how much he would love his own children with Lucy when they existed to realise that he would love each one the same and nothing would change it – no matter how many there were.

Two, for Bickslow and Lucy, seemed like a good starting point, if anything. If they ever got to the point where they felt like they wanted another baby, well, they'd discuss it then.

After hearing about Bickslow's dream that might not have really been a dream, Lucy had loved the idea of them having both a boy and a girl. But in reality, she just didn't care. She could have all girls or all boys and she just wouldn't mind, and that was something Bickslow had agreed with. But, he had to admit that a girl and boy was really appealing, and if it turned out that way, he would really be the happiest man alive.

It was as they talked about their future children and their family that would exist one day, and after they drifted from the possible genetic combinations to whether or not they'd be able to use magic did the conversation suddenly get strange. Of course, when Bickslow said things wouldn't be as simple as whether or not their kids would end up with blue hair and brown eyes or blonde hair and red eyes, and either one of their magics, Lucy was more than confused. It was at that point Bickslow only smiled and said he'd talk about it in the morning.

So there Bickslow was, quickly looking for a particular book on Seith magic on his bookshelf. Technically, Bickslow could explain it all himself, but despite the book quite possibly being the worst book on Seith magic in the entire world, it was the only one with a decent explanation of what happened when a Seith mage had children. Plus, Lucy liked reading, and Bickslow figured she'd have a better chance of understanding it if she read it instead.

Finding the specific book he'd been searching for, he pulled it from where it was on the top shelf with the rest of his books on various magics, and he turned on his heels to head back down the hall and into his bedroom. "So I know it…" Bickslow trailed off when he looked up from the cover of the book in his hands and to the bed just in front of him. He almost had to pick his jaw up from the ground when he saw the way she was tangled up in the sheets; the black material wrapped around her every curve.

He really hadn't thought anyone could look good in a sheet until he'd meet her, but oh did that sheet truly look amazing right then.

"You alright there?" Lucy asked as she lifted an arm up to rest on the pillow above her head, an amused smirk on her face as she looked to her fiancé.

Bickslow nodded slowly. "Uh-huh." He only slowly moved back into the room as he kept his eyes on the blonde beneath his sheets, and he gently placed the book down on his nightstand before he knelt on the edge of the bed with a slightly lecherous smirk. "Thank you, gods," Bickslow began as he looked up to the ceiling with his hands held together.

"Bicks…"

"For letting my future wife be the most gorgeous woman in all the galaxies and universes," he continued. Slowly, he leant forward over the bed until he was over the blonde, and as he hovered over her with his hands and knees on either side of her, he brought his head down to murmur, "And thank you for letting her be the sexy blonde I've been head over heels for since our first date, and thank you so very much for letting me have this wonderful, _amazing_ woman a part of my life once again and letting her be the most forgiving and kind-hearted person I have ever had the pleasure of meeting."

Lucy sighed with a tired smile as she rolled just a fraction as he began to tug the sheet away from where it was almost clinging to her, pulling it away slowly as his lips trailed slowly over each new part of exposed flesh. "Hey, I was wearing that," she complained as his fingers ghosted over the quickly healing gash over her hip.

"I know. And you looked good in it… But you look better without it."

"But you say that about everything I wear just so you can get me naked."

Bickslow lifted his head from where he was over her stomach, and the corner of his mouth lifted up into a smirk. "It works though, doesn't it?"

She hummed in thought for a moment before she quietly answered, "I suppose, but sometimes I wish it didn't work so well."

"Liar."

"Not lying."

He chuckled as he moved up her form again, and her hands slowly came up to lace behind his neck and tangle in the locks at the nape of his neck. "You are lying," he murmured against her lips. "You enjoy being naked as much as I enjoy seeing you." Of course, if she decided to permanently lose the clothes when she was at home, then Bickslow would have no problems whatsoever. He knew Lucy wouldn't have any problems with it either, if it wasn't for the fact they would not be productive in the slightest. Lucy would be more worried about their lack of productivity than Bickslow ever would be, that was for sure.

So of course, maybe Bickslow was right, but she wasn't exactly going to tell him that. Oh no. Regardless of the fact he knew exactly what the truth was, she just wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of getting what he wanted. Not that time, anyway.

"Maybe so," Lucy replied. "But…" Her eyes fluttered close and her back arched ever so slightly as his fingers brushed over her core when he brought a hand between them. "Now you're just getting distracted though."

"I am, aren't I?" He finally eased his fingers into her dripping sex just as her back bowed into him again, and a shaky moan escaped her lips. "But in my defence, it's hard not to be distracted by you, especially when you just so happen to still almost take my breath away every single time I see you."

Lucy could feel her heart beating erratically in her chest as her eyes fluttered closed, and as quickly as he'd always been able to, she could feel herself beginning to spiral towards her end as he almost painfully slowly worked his fingers in and out of her core. The temptation to just let Bickslow work her over the edge was far too strong, but her curiosity would have to win out. There would be plenty of time for her to be a distraction later, because right then, she didn't want to let herself get distracted.

It took the blonde all the self-control she had left to have her eyes snap open and she bit her lip as he brushed against that sweet spot that had her shuddering lightly within his hold. He was, and always would be, the death of her and _her_ distraction. But she still wasn't going to let him win. "B-Bicks…"

Her voice came out weaker than she'd intended, and she only barely registered the heat on her face as she looked to the near wicked grin on his face. "That would be my name."

"As much as I love distractions, and as much as I love how you make me feel like I'm on top of the world sometimes…" Like he always did, if anything, because he knew exactly what to say and what to do to make her feel like she really was the only person in the entire world he even matters too. Reaching down to lightly wrap her own fingers around his wrist, Lucy ignored the part of her that screamed at her for making him stop, and she said, "I'm much more interested in why you brought that book on Seith magic in."

"Well I thought I was your world, so maybe you should get on top of me?"

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Lucy giggled.

A hand slipped under her waist to pull her up to him, his chest flush against hers before he quickly rolled her sideways with him until she was sitting over his hips, and he was more than glad he'd decided to lose the rest of his own clothes. He didn't even know why he'd put anything on in the first place. "I'd more than like it," he chuckled.

At that point, Lucy was definitely having a difficult time not giving in to the temptation to let herself be distracted. She wanted to, and she definitely knew Bickslow wanted to, but she wasn't going to cave. She wanted to know what Bickslow knew and she didn't about their future kids, and it was because that's what it was about that she was trying her best not to cave.

There was still time for distractions later.

So ignoring Bickslow's hands that only slowly trailed up and down her back and her thighs, she leant forward just enough to pull the heavy book from the nightstand and then gently place it on Bickslow's chest. He couldn't help but sigh in frustration when she opened up to look to the preface, and he lifted his hands just to fold them behind his head. "This is just cruel," he muttered.

"Patience, Bicks."

"I don't have any right n—oh _god_ , you're positively evil." Just the slightest movement of her hips was enough to be absolute torture for him, but he'd be lying if he said he hated it. He was usually the one to tease her to the point of wanting to hate him, but right then, Bickslow was sure she'd be doing it to him.

Lucy hummed in agreement before she began to slowly turn the pages of the book. The sooner Bickslow explained whatever it was he needed to explain, the sooner Lucy could cave. "Now," she began firmly as she slowly flicked the pages over. "I seem to recall you saying this book was one of the worst ones on your magic, so why exactly am I currently looking at this?" It was actually the first book she'd read on Seith magic, and the one she'd been too enthralled in to put down the first time she'd ever stayed at Bickslow's for the night. She remembered all too well the conversation that had followed when she'd first started to learn about his magic.

"Right, well, I still stand by what I said, because this book is terrible." Bickslow knew there was nothing he could do about his distraction, so he figured he might as well just get on with what he'd got up to do in the first place. Turning the book around so he could turn to the section he wanted, he turned the pages a few at a time as he said, "But anyway. Now that we both know we're going to do the entire kid thing eventually, or at least we'll try to, I guess, I feel like there are a few things I should let you know about. It's not really that they're super important, and they shouldn't really change anything, but I still feel like I should tell you, because I know you don't know."

"So it's more about you wanting to make sure I know everything about your magic?"

Bickslow nodded. "Pretty much, but it's not really just my magic, because it's yours too."

Lucy arched an eyebrow as Bickslow turned the book back around so it was the right way up for Lucy, and she looked back down it as she mumbled, "My magic?"

"Yup. So… You remember how our magics are kind of similar as far as the whole bonds and then the souls and spirits thing goes?" Lucy nodded as she turned a page, and Bickslow lifted a hand to put it behind his head once again as he made himself comfortable as both a table and chair. "Well, it means they're kind of incompatible because they're apparently _too_ similar."

"What? Like zodiac sign incompatibility?"

"No. Incompatible when it comes to passing it on to our children."

Her brows drew together as she looked up from the book she'd only been skimming, and she stared at the blank face of her fiancé. "Okay… You've kind of lost me. How can two different types of magic be incompatible? I would think that the more dominant one, assuming it can even be passed on to the next generation, would be the one that's most likely to come out." she said slowly.

She knew that Seith magic was one that tended to run in families so she'd always been aware that there was a chance any children she had with Bickslow would end up with the same magic. That chance was the same as their children ending up with her magic too, because Mavis knows there was enough Celestial Spirit magic running in the veins on her mother's side of the family.

If anything though, Lucy just didn't care what type of mages their children would end up being. Seith, Stellar, something else, or just not at all. They could be anything and she wouldn't care, because regardless, they'd still be her children and she'd love them unconditionally.

But how their magics would be incompatible, Lucy just had no idea at all.

"You'd think that would be the case, because that would make the most sense, but it's not that simple," Bickslow sighed. "So obviously, Human Possession Seith magic and Celestial Spirit magic have always been the most closely linked just because of the similarities, but you knew that already. The problem with my magic specifically, is that there are apparently many types of magic that just won't exactly be compatible with it when it comes to a Seith mage having kids."

She looked down to the page as he turned the page for her, and her eyes went wide when she saw a table filled that took up more than half the page; all of them apparently magics that's weren't compatible. And not surprisingly, Celestial Spirit magic was right at the top of that list.

"I'm still lost though."

"I figured as much." He didn't blame her for not getting it, because for a long time, Bickslow hadn't either. He'd always known about it, because he'd read almost every single book there was on Seith magic as he'd been growing up, just because he'd been the first in his family to be a Seith mage in a very long time. No one was around to teach him how to control himself or to find souls or to do anything. He'd had to figure it all out on his own

It wasn't until a few months before he'd broken up with Lucy did he come back to it. Until then, it had just been something in the back of his head that he hadn't thought about much. It had only been when he was entirely certain that she was the one person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with and have a family with one day did he finally come back to it, because he'd wanted to know more about it. He'd wanted to know what it meant if (and when) they had children of their own. Luckily for Bickslow though, it was something that was in a lot of the books on Seith magic. For whatever reason, it had just never been covered in the one he'd given Lucy.

Sighing again, he gently flicked the page over to the next one, and he asked, "Have you ever heard of hybrid magic?" The look of sheer confusion on her face clued him in then, and he took it as a no. He didn't blame her for that either, because not many people knew of it. "It's basically when a person is able to use more than one type of magic, but more often than not, they're incomplete. It's a little like the second generation Dragon Slayers, which is what Laxus is, remember? So primarily, he's a lightning mage, but the lacrima in him allows him to use the Dragon Slayer magic _with_ his primary magic, but since it's second generation, it's not quite the same as Gajeel's or Wendy's. It's incredibly rare, so there's not that much on it."

"Right," Lucy said thoughtfully as she compartmentalised everything in her head. It sounded familiar, but it was only ever something she'd read about once. "But… How does our magic come into that?"

"Well, you know Seith magic isn't something you can just pick up a book and learn because it's something you're born with that develops over time, where Celestial Spirit magic can be learned, but also passed down. Like with your family."

"Yeah…"

"But the problem with ours _together_ is that neither one is more dominant than the other when you think about it genetically and the chances of passing either on to the next generation. That's what makes them incompatible."

Her brow became furrowed as finished reading a short passage in the book in front of her that said the same as what Bickslow had said. "So what does that mean exactly?" she asked softly.

"For us, it means that theoretically, when we have a kid, they _could_ be born a hybrid mage," Bickslow answered. He'd run it through his head a million times, and he'd read everything he could on hybrid mages (ones where Seith magic or Stellar magic was involved too) and incompatible magic.

Bickslow knew exactly how crazy it sounded, but it still made sense to him.

Clearing his throat as he saw Lucy only staring at him in complete shock and confusion again, he quickly mumbled, "But of course, there's still the possibility that they could end up getting mine, or yours, or neither and then who knows what." That was always a possibility.

It took Lucy another moment before she had finished processing everything. The similarity of their magics was what made them incompatible, and because of it, there was a chance that they could have a child that was both Seith mage and Stellar mage. It was crazy, insane, and absurd. But it was also incredibly exciting.

"So you're telling me," Lucy began slowly as a smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "That when we have a baby, there is a chance that they'll be born with not only the ability to see and control human souls, but to open gates and control spirits too?"

Bickslow nodded as he grinned up at her. "It's possible, yeah," he chuckled. "But since most hybrid mages don't have complete magics, it could end up being a case where they'd only be able to see souls and not really have Figure Eyes, or they'd only be able to use silver keys or something. Anything could happen."

"Why didn't you ever tell me about this before?"

"Because I didn't really want to maybe scare you away from the idea of having kids with me one day or anything like that."

Lucy smiled softly as she closed the book sitting on his chest and placed it back on the nightstand, knowing she could go back and read that section in its entirety later. "Aw, Bicks," she whispered, leaning forward to rest against his chest with her hands slowly running through his hair. She had to stomach her own quiet moan as she shifted, but Bickslow did nothing of the sort and Lucy was back to fighting the temptation of the distraction that was right between her legs. "You know that's silly. This doesn't change anything."

"I realised it was silly later," he sighed. At the time, he'd truly been worried about what Lucy would think, especially when he hadn't done a lot of research into the whole thing. At the time, despite knowing he wanted to be with Lucy, he still hadn't really been that set in stone about wanting kids. If they had them, great. If not, well it wouldn't have been the end of the world.

Now though? Now, things were different, and Bickslow knew that they were on the same page about wanting to start a family together, and that was truly exactly what he wanted. Still though, part of Bickslow not wanted to tell Lucy earlier was being he didn't think it was that pertinent to them having kids in the first place. He still thought that. He just wanted to tell her anyway. "I'm glad this doesn't change anything for you either though," he said softly as his arms slowly came down to wrap around her waist. He wasn't exactly surprised none of it changed Lucy's decision to have children, because regardless of who they were and what magic they did or didn't have or use, they'd still be their kids and they'd love them no matter what. "But I just wanted to tell you anyway, because you know, I actually thought it was pretty cool and when we were talking about like what our kids would be like and look like and all that, which, I might add, could possibly end up being a little more complicated too, I just remembered all of this stuff I'd read about a while back, and I just… I knew that I needed to tell you."

"Okay, well… Firstly, what else is complicated now?" she giggled, sitting up slightly and rolling her hips just enough to cause her core to graze lightly over his arousal.

Bickslow grinned. "I'll explain that one another time."

"Uh-huh..." Slowly, as her hands trailed down over his chest and against the hard planes of his stomach, Lucy lifted herself just enough to reach down between them to line him up at her entrance. "Secondly," she murmured, slowly easing down on the thick shaft with a quiet moan. "I'm glad you told me, because I love it, and I almost wish we weren't going to have to wait so long."

It wasn't so much the wait until they were both ready to start trying to get pregnant (again) that bothered Lucy, because they hadn't even come close to discussing it yet. She figured it would come up soon, but not right then when they'd just gotten back together. Instead, it would be the wait until their future children showed any signs of their magic developing, whatever that magic may be. At best, it wouldn't be until they were a few years old anyway, and when there was a possibility it would be something entirely new, Lucy was far too excited to see just how things would turn out.

His hands gripped her hips as she just as slowly slid up his length, and he only said, "So do I, but that's really not what I want to be focusing on right now." He was quickly becoming as distracted as Lucy obviously was, and the sultry smirk she gave him then only made him all the more certain of what was going through (or not going through) her mind.

"Uh-huh…" she mumbled again. If anything, she wasn't really sure what Bickslow had said. She'd heard the words, or at least she'd heard most of them, but right then, Lucy was just a little distracted to even really consider paying attention to anything else.

* * *

Four days.

That was how long they spent in Bickslow's apartment – or technically _their_ apartment, even though Lucy hadn't begun moving in yet – doing nothing but talking about anything and everything that had happened in the last year or just completely random things, talking (or Bickslow talked and Lucy listened) about their future family, sleeping, and having a _lot_ of great sex. By the third day in, they'd had a bet on how long it would take before Lucy's clothes were on the floor somewhere.

It wasn't that much of a surprise that Bickslow won though, especially when he said thirty seconds and only proceeded to push her up against the bookcase and try his best to _tear_ what little clothing off that she'd had on at the time. He just couldn't help himself at all, and his argument for not being able to keep his hands off his fiancée was that they had a lot of catching up to do.

On the fifth afternoon though, Lucy stood in the bathroom, quietly humming to herself as she decided on what to keep and what to throw out. Bickslow really had kept everything of hers, so all of her shampoos and lotions and everything else of hers that belonged in a bathroom were all stowed away in either the drawers or the cabinets that were hers.

For the last four days, she'd sparingly tried to use (or just flat out avoided using) some of her soaps or her lotions, just because of what had happened the last time she left a damn bubble bath for seven years. She wasn't risking that shit again, even if it had only been _one_ year. No way in hell. It was why she'd dragged Bickslow into one of her favourite stores in Magnolia after they'd finished getting groceries that morning, because she had needed to restock their bathroom with a million different scented soaps that Bickslow secretly loved using.

Bickslow walked into the bathroom when he finished putting the groceries away in the kitchen. It had surprisingly been the first time they'd ever gone grocery shopping together. For a long time, it had just been Bickslow in that apartment, and he'd only ever had to buy the things that he needed, liked, or wanted to eat. Even when Lucy had practically lived there for the better part of a year and probably used his kitchen more in the space of six months than he had in the nearly six years he'd lived there, they'd never done it together. He'd only ever made sure to buy the foods that he knew for certain she loved.

Like strawberries and practically anything strawberry flavoured (literally _anything_ ), a whole lot of dark chocolate, and chocolate chip cookie dough ice-cream. He'd stopped counting how many times he'd come back from a job late at night just to find her tucked up in bed with the entire tub of ice-cream sitting half-melted in her lap and in tears over a book, or having girl talk with Levy, Erza, and Wendy.

But that day, they'd done it together because they did things together now. They were moving in together, getting married, and going to eventually start trying to have a baby and start their family. For the rest of their lives, they would be together. Plus, there was the entire issue where neither really wanted to go anywhere without the other, even if they'd only be gone for a little while. Not to mention having someone to argue with about what type of milk to buy was just a little fun… Strangely.

So he leant against the doorframe and looked around the bathroom with every single drawer and cabinet open and every surface (including the floor) covered in bottles, tubes, tubs, boxes and anything else that contained some sort of… Well, anything. Shampoos, conditioners, lip balms, bubble baths, moisturisers (and let's not forget the differences between the ones designed for her face, her hands, and then her body), and a whole fuck ton of makeup.

"Do I even want to ask?" he chuckled as he watched her pick up one bottle, read the label, open the cap and tip it upside down over the sink just to grimace as she watched something slightly watery trickle from it, and then drop it gracefully into the overflowing garbage bag that was hanging from one of the open drawers in front of her.

"Maybe," she shrugged as she threw another bottle into the bag. "I'm just doing some Spring cleaning."

"It's still Summer though. That means you don't have to start throwing things out until the end of the week."

She looked over her shoulder with a smirk just as she pulled a small towel from where it was sitting on the counter under a large number of beauty products, and she tossed it to the grinning Seith mage. "Don't be a smartass."

Bickslow chuckled quietly as he pushed himself away from the wall and stepped into the bathroom and over the floor littered in bottles and containers, and stepped up behind the blonde to drop the cloth back on the counter. "But baby, it's in my nature to be a smartass," he murmured, bringing his head down rest his chin on her shoulder as his arms wrapped around her from behind.

"Oh, I've realised." She looked up and to the mirror after dropping an old lip gloss in a shade she loved into a bag, just as Bickslow's hands began to slowly move up and down her waist and her hips. He'd had an uncanny ability to get her distracted in a matter of seconds over the last few days, but it wasn't going to work then. She had a bathroom to organise. "Bickslow…"

"Mm-hmm?"

"Don't you have something better to be doing? Or somewhere else to be?"

His gaze lifted to look to the scowling blonde in the reflection, and his wide grin was hidden against her shoulder as his lips slowly brushed over each light mark marring her fair skin. "You know for a fact I have nowhere else to be," he said thickly. "And I'd really much rather be doing you anyway."

"And I'd rather stay in my clothes for more than five minutes."

"You look better without them."

"So you've said," she sighed. She'd heard it too many times to count in the last four days alone, and then four times that day already. Or… Technically it was now five times. Lifting up the jar with one of her old favourite lotions, she twisted the lid from it, and only quickly screwed it back on when she realised it was nearly empty anyway. "But the goal was to go for twelve hours today, remember? So the clothes stay on."

He groaned into the back of her neck. "That's so far away though. I've still got another…"

"Seven hours."

He groaned again. "Oh god… Seven hours. Why are you doing this to me, Cosplayer? You're supposed to love me!" he whined.

Lucy giggled as she grabbed hold of the counter when his arms completely laced around the front of her stomach and he tried to pry her away from the counter. She completely failed though, and when he instead picked her up off the ground and started walking backwards, surprisingly not stumbling over too many bottles, she was instead just a giggling mess of flailing limbs in her fiancé's arms. "Because I'm trying to teach you to have some self-control again," she laughed.

"Well, it's really just going to be a waste of time, isn't it?"

She arched a brow and turned her head to look to Bickslow who was now beside her after falling back to the bed, his head propped up with an elbow on the mattress, and his other arm still tightly around Lucy's waist. "How so?" she asked curiously as she picked her feet up from where they were hanging over the edge of the bed, and let them rest on the edge of the mattress instead.

Lucy wasn't sure how teaching her soon-to-be husband some self-control when it came to her would be a waste of time. With the way things currently were, she wouldn't wear clothes ever again, and neither would he. In fact, they'd probably never go on any jobs again, or leave the damn apartment. He would, as he had stated many times over the last few days, rather enjoy making love to the hottest cosplayer the world has ever seen every day until he was seventy-five. At that, Lucy had only been able to roll her eyes and go and have a shower – and make sure the door was locked so Bickslow couldn't join her in it _again_.

"Because... If we're gonna make a baby, then we're gonna have to be having a lot, like, _a lot_ of sex."

"That's not really how it works, you know."

Bickslow shrugged. "Yeah it is." Of course, Bickslow had figured out that that really wasn't the best way to go about it. He'd come to the realisation that if they were really going to try and get pregnant, then it would involve some planning and some strategizing… Plus a lot of sex. That was just a given though. The rest he was just going to leave to Lucy for obvious reasons.

It didn't help that he really did have absolutely zero self-control when it came to Lucy now, and even if he'd had some semblance of it once before, he was sure it wouldn't be the same. Not when she'd be his _wife_ , and oh, was Bickslow having a hard time wrapping his head around that little detail. Luckily, he had another fifty-one weeks to do that though.

"But seriously," he said softly then as he dropped his head to rest by hers on the mattress, his other arm wrapping around her shoulders beneath her. "I know it's not just about sex, surprisingly, and I know I've probably said it a million times so far, but I really can't wait until we start trying. Well, I can wait, because we'll wait until you're ready to start, but I just mean that I'm really excited for all of it."

Lucy smiled as she whispered, "You really can't wait to start our family, can you?"

"Not at all. I almost wish you were pregnant now, or that we had a baby already or something." His brow became creased before he mumbled, "I'm beginning to think that I'm more excited about having a baby than you are, to be honest…" Bickslow felt he was though. He was just far too excited and way too impatient to start his family, and he really did wish that they could already start. He couldn't even put into words how much he wanted a baby, because with just the last week, it had just gotten so out of hand.

Lucy had seen it too, and she absolutely loved it. There hadn't been a day over the last few where Bickslow hadn't brought up something about them having a baby, and granted; most of those times had been when their clothes had been on the floor, too.

She'd be lying if she said that Bickslow's enthusiasm wasn't wearing off on her though, because it really was. It was just a little annoying that he was making her want a baby more and more each day (already), because it was just messing with her plans. Of course, she didn't really mind that much, because she was realising waiting to start a family until after they were married was an incredibly long time to wait, and that was what she'd thought would be the best way to go.

Move in, plan the wedding, get married, and then start a family. They would be, if anything, saving the most stressful for last.

But now? Now, Bickslow's excitement, enthusiasm and impatience was quickly wearing her own patience thin. It was contagious, and she really did love it. He was like a kid on Christmas Day, and Lucy was sure that when they were eventually pregnant and she tells him, his reaction would be sure to blow her out of the water.

Of all things to be contagious, excitement was one of the best, especially when it was about starting a family. It was only when that crossed her mind as she shifted in her fiancé's arms so she was on her side and facing him did she realise something, and Lucy couldn't hold in her laughter for more than a second.

"Oh honey…" Lucy lifted a hand from where she had it resting on Bickslow's side and pressed the back of it to his forehead, much to his confusion. "Are you feeling okay?" she asked softly.

Bickslow could only wonder what was going through his cosplayer's head when he saw that gleam in her eyes and the smile on her lips. Did she know something he didn't? "Uh… Of course. Why?" he asked, his brow slightly furrowing as he became worried. _Am I sick? Oh god… And what is she laughing about? Why is she laughing about me being sick?!_

"Because I think you might have baby fever," she giggled.

He blinked at her. "Baby… What? What the fuck is… Just, huh?"

"Baby fever," she said again, biting the inside of her cheek as she tried to stop herself from bursting at the seams from laughing too much. She was sure death by laughter was a thing; especially when she had an adorably dorky Seith mage as her future husband. Calming down some when Bickslow tried his very best not to laugh along with her, even though he was confused as all hell, she explained, "It's when you really want a baby, and it's close to the point where you're obsessed about having one."

"Is that… An actual thing?"

"Yup. But… It's usually the girls who get it," she said quietly with a permanent smile on her face. "You know, they'll spend time around babies and they'll long for their own or just another baby to have and to hold…" Oh, it was just so adorable picturing Bickslow having baby fever, that she really couldn't get the idea out of her head.

So he might not have been near any babies recently – she knew he hadn't been near Jax, but Lucy hoped he would be now – but he still was obsessed over having his own. He badly wanted a baby, and Lucy found it absolutely brilliant. Her jokester, prankster, pervert, idiotic Seith mage of a husband-to-be had baby fever, and it was perfect.

His mouth twisted into a tight line and he only gave what was a half-assed attempt at a scowl. Bickslow realised he couldn't be mad about having this so-called _baby fever,_ because he found himself strangely liking it. In fact, he would have his baby fever with pride, thank you very much! "So I'm a dude… With this _baby fever_ thing," he mumbled, just trying to get his head around what it was he actually had.

"Guys can get it too. Don't worry," she replied. "And it's really quite adorable and sweet. I'm seeing that it's contagious, too."

His lips pulled up into a wide grin then. "Contagious, huh?" He wasn't worried about it being adorable or sweet or any other word she wanted to use. Not at all. He pulled Lucy closer to him to nuzzle the side of her neck, and murmured slowly, "So how would I manage to pass on this _horrible_ , _terrible_ sickness?"

Lucy sighed. "I'd say just keep doing what you're doing."

"What? Fucking you every chance I get?" he laughed, only to get a slap to his shoulder when he lifted his head again.

"No," she said, rolling her eyes. "Just daydreaming and fantasising and just talking about it. I love how excited you are already, and you're kind of making me almost want to be having a baby right now, too."

"But you're not ready yet. I know that, baby," he said softly. "And like I said before, I'll be ready when you are, whether it's two weeks from now, or three months, or six months, or even a year. It's all about you."

She ducked her head against his chest as his arms wrapped completely around her waist, and she sighed in content. "There's no way I'm waiting a year now. That's for sure," she muttered. A year was truly too long to even wait to get started, and then there'd be all that time where they'd be trying, and what if it takes them a long time then? What happens then? Lucy just didn't want to be having to go down that path where she worried about them not being able to have a baby.

And right then, she didn't even want to think about it.

"I am so glad you said that," Bickslow chuckled.

With that, Lucy only smiled once again before she quickly pulled herself away from Bickslow (with Bickslow only sighing in frustration and pressing his face into the bed instead), and stood up with the intent of heading back to the bathroom to finish sorting out all of her things within the bathroom. If anything, Lucy wanting to clean everything out wasn't entirely because she didn't want to be using year-old products, but also because she needed to make room for everything she kept in her own apartment and had been using frequently over the last couple of weeks and months. Plus, not to mention all of the things she'd left in Crocus in her apartment there.

There had only been one downside to leaving Crocus so quickly, and that was that she hadn't really packed anything at all. A good portion of her clothes and almost all of her belongings were still sitting covered in dust, and they all needed to be sorted out at some point. She'd managed to save enough with her odd freelance jobs and her work at the magazine to get the rent covered until the end of the year, so everything was untouched there… Including the mail she knew would be piling up by then.

The only problem with it all was that it was on the opposite side of the country, and she'd need to be there for a few weeks so she could find someone to take everything she couldn't bring back to Magnolia.

"Hey, Bicks," Lucy suddenly called from the bathroom as her mind drifted off to how and when she'd find the time to go to Crocus. Hearing a muffled grunt from the Seith mage, she said, "Did you hear back from your sisters yet?"

After realising that Lucy had accidentally met Bickslow's sisters just a few minutes before he'd been reunited with them, they'd talked about meeting up with them, and if anything, surprise them by showing up together. Lucy had wanted to get to know them a little better, and Bickslow had needed to meet his nephews and niece, but then they'd both come back to Magnolia, and meeting the rest of the Alderwood family had just had to wait. For both of them.

But now that they were back together and getting their lives back on track and sorting out everything, going and seeing Bickslow's sisters was one of the things on their to-do list, along with a million other things. So it was exactly why Bickslow had sent them a letter (being the only one who actually knew their addresses) just a few days earlier wondering when it would be a good time for him to visit now that he was settled back in Magnolia. Of course, he hadn't mentioned that he was back with his ex and he was now engaged to her, because that was supposed to be a surprise.

"I did, actually. It came this morning," Bickslow replied. He quickly pulled himself to the edge of the bed, then made his way over to the bathroom and leant against the doorframe once again. "They said we could go whenever. They live pretty close to each other and their main store isn't too far from them either, so we could leave in a few days if you wanted to, or we could wait until you've moved in completely or whatever."

"Well, I actually need to go to Crocus since I need to sort out my apartment there and get a lot of my things anyway, so it would actually be better if we could go before I move in. At least that way I'll be able to properly sort out what I'm keeping and what I'm donating or selling and it will make me moving in just a little easier."

Bickslow shrugged. "It's up to you. We could go next weekend then, if you want? Get it all out of the way quickly."

"That works." They still had another week up their sleeve if they waited until the next weekend, and in that time, Lucy could at least begin sorting out all of her belongings in her apartment in Magnolia, and of course, put off talking to her landlady, who was still terrifying, for just a little while longer.

"In that case, I'll let them know that we'll be up next weekend," Bickslow said, a wide grin on his face as he went back to idly watching Lucy clean up the mess she'd made in the bathroom. It was only then did he become incredibly curious as to why she was doing it in the first place, and so as she dropped yet another bottle filled with some strange pink liquid into the trash bag, he asked, "Okay, seriously. Why are you doing all of this? And don't say Spring cleaning."

The corner of her lips pulled up into a smirk as she looked over her shoulder. "Because the last time I used something that had been left in a bathroom for more than a year, I ended up turning invisible, and I was forced to walk around the entire town without any clothes, just to get to the guild to try and turn back."

"You mean… You were naked and invisible in the middle of the guild?"

"Uh-huh."

Bickslow was at a loss for words as he tried to picture a very naked and very invisible blonde running around town and the guild, but of course, his version of it had her very _visible_. He could only mutter a " _huh,_ " as he walked away, because that was all his brain could come up with as he cursed his team for being out on a job, because Bickslow was positive he'd remember an event like that happening, and he would never have let her live it down if he'd know.

Not a chance.

* * *

 _ **Woo, okay, so it was a little lime-y, but that's okay... I think (and hope). It's hard not to do that when the main character is Bix...  
And yes, Bix does have baby fever. Deal with it. I think it's cute. **_

_**Anyway! As I said at the start, I'm sorry for not being able to get this updated more often. At the moment, I've got a lot of stories going at once (**_ **A Peculiar Situation, Shattered, How I Met You, Literature in History** _ **, and now, the**_ **Brothers, Sisters, and Unfortunate Husbands** _ **universe which is just a collection of related one-shots like the**_ **Happy Wife, Happy Life** _ **universe) and I can't spend all of my time on one story. As much as I want to sometimes, if I do that, I'll end up hating it. So... I try and get a chapter up for each story so it's kind of like a cycle. It just means that updates will be slow for all of my stories, so yeah, I hope you can all forgive me for that.**_

 _ **I do hope you enjoyed this chapter though!**_

 _ **Until next time.**_

 _ **\- April**_


	47. Chapter 47

"I still can't believe you didn't actually tell them it was _me_ who was coming with you," Lucy muttered under her breath as she walked up the steps to Sara's quaint little home in the quieter streets of Crocus.

"Oh, come on. If I'd told them that we were back together in a letter, it would ruin the fun," Bickslow insisted. "Trust me, when they see you, they will freak out."

She frowned, and as she stopped before the wooden door, she realised she was nervous. Why? She had no idea, because she'd met Bickslow's sisters before, and she thought they'd gotten along great considering she'd been the ex-girlfriend of their long lost brother at the time. She didn't have a reason to be nervous. Bickslow seemed to think they'd love her if they didn't already, and he'd told her numerous times on their way over to Sara's house that she had nothing to worry about.

But she was worrying. Because she was meeting her boyfriend's – err… Fiancé's – family. Including their kids and their husbands (if they were there, anyway). She was meeting all that was left of Bickslow's family, and it was the same family that she was marrying into in just under a year. Looking back up to him with his stupidly contagious grin, she quietly asked, "Good freak out, or bad?"

"Definitely good."

When Bickslow raised his hand to knock on the wooden door, Lucy couldn't help but step back to be behind Bickslow, and she didn't even let go of his hand when she did, so she only pulled his arm behind his back to hug it tightly to her chest and peek around him. He was large enough to hide behind, and that's what she wanted to do right then. She was too nervous, damn it! Meeting her future sisters-in-law for the _second_ time was more nerve-wracking when it should be, especially when they didn't know she'd be there at all.

He only shook his head at the cowering blonde with a quick glance over his shoulder, and then looked back to the door before him as it was pulled open with a wide grin and his tongue hanging like it usually did. "Evil Two," Bickslow greeted the youngest of the twins (by all of four minutes), Sara.

"Bicks!" Sara's face lit up as she saw her brother standing outside her door. She'd been so excited ever since she'd received the letter from him saying he'd come up to visit that weekend, and ever since she'd told her twin boys that they'd be getting to meet their uncle, she hadn't been able to control them. She couldn't as it was, because her four year olds were absolutely full of energy – and on more than one occasion, Sara had told her husband that her sons were very much like how Bickslow had been when he'd been that age. She was just too excited to see her baby – and the fact he was seven years younger than he should be only made him that much more of a baby to her and Saskia – brother, but she wasn't exactly going to leave him standing on her doorstep, was she? Stepping back and pulling the door open, she quickly beckoned him in towards the hall and quickly said, "Come in, come in! Sas had to go down to the store quickly to take care of something but she should be here soon."

"Oh, sweet." He took just one step forward before he stopped, and a slow grin spread on his face as he turned to look over his shoulder and to Lucy who was still cowering behind him. "Now, am I going to have to _carry_ you in or are you going to be fine as long as you're holding my hand?" She glared up at him before taking the smallest step she possibly could to the side, still not letting go of his hand, and still hiding behind his back. Only turning back to his sister, Bickslow shrugged and explained, "Sorry. Fiancée is being a little shy for some reason."

"Fi-Fiancee?" Sara spluttered, staring wide-eyed at Bickslow. _He didn't mention anything about a damn fiancée in his letters!_ "I… I thought you weren't even seeing anyone! And… And what about Lucy?" She'd been sure Bickslow still had at least some feelings for the blonde, since the last time they'd met, he hadn't even been able to say Lucy's name. Considering that had really only been two months earlier, Sara had no idea how he could have been able to move on and get engaged so quickly.

Glancing back over his shoulder to where he could feel Lucy pulling on the sleeve of his shirt with her hands tightening around his forearm, he wasn't surprised to see the dusting of crimson on her cheeks. "Come on, Cosplayer. You can't hide behind me forever," he chuckled.

 _Damn it._ Lucy knew he was right, and she knew that she was really just making a fool of herself by hiding behind him. But she just couldn't stop being nervous! She'd never thought she'd get the chance to meet his family, and that was a pretty big thing to her, even if Bickslow had been her first boyfriend anyway. Lucy just wanted to be accepted by his family, because they would be her family too along with Bickslow.

She still knew she was being stupid though. Bickslow's sisters liked her. She'd met them, Saskia's daughter apparently idolised her, and both Sara and Saskia had agreed that catching up again was a good idea (and Lucy had found the letter they'd sent them just after the games had ended, and it only made her feel guilty). She had nothing to worry about whatsoever, because she had already been welcomed into that family with open arms.

She was just being a wuss for no reason, and she was truly making a fool of herself. Nodding, Lucy stepped away from the safety that hiding behind Bickslow's back apparently offered, and she peeked around him again before stepping up beside him with his hand still clutched in hers. "So uh… Hi."

"Oh my goodness, you…" Sara was almost at a loss for words as she looked between the blushing blonde and her grinning brother. "You two are getting married?!" Her voice was so high it rivalled Evergreen's when she got excited, and Bickslow knew that Sara rarely got that excited. But when she launched herself at Lucy and threw her arms around her before she'd even finished the sentence, all Bickslow could do was step back and blink to try and see if he was actually seeing what he thought he was. "Just… _How_?!"

"It's… A bit of a long story. We'll explain it later," Bickslow laughed. When Sara released Lucy, who was only looking just a little shocked (and relieved), he leant down just to quickly kiss her temple and quietly said, "Told ya there was nothing to worry about."

* * *

"And then the knight fell from the window!"

Bickslow gasped as he stared to the four-year-old standing in front of him, and he leant forward to rest his elbows on his knees and rest his chin in his hands. "Was the knight okay though?" Bickslow asked the boy with the light brown hair that matched his twin brother's. "Did the princess make him feel better?"

The boy, Jasper, shook his head. "Nuh-uh!"

"How come?"

"The princess didn't love him," Jasper said.

"What a shame." Bickslow sighed as he straightened up and leant against the lounge Lucy was sitting on just beside him. "I was really rooting for them too. What went wrong?"

Sitting down on the rug in the living room next to his brother, Damian, Jasper reached for the colourful blocks with the numbers and letters on them and began stacking them up. "Princess had her own princess," Damian explained simply instead, finishing their story.

As Lucy choked on her drink, not expecting the child's answer, Bickslow only burst into laughter and was almost on the brink of being in tears. He had not expected that answer in the slightest, but oh, was it great. "Yeah, well… That'll break a guy's heart for sure," he chuckled. Looking up to his sister and her husband sitting on the lounge opposite where he sat on the floor, Bickslow said, "These two definitely have a vivid imagination."

"That's for certain," Sara replied as she placed her cup down on a coaster on the coffee table. If it was one thing her boys were capable of doing, it was creating very unexpected endings to their stories. She and her husband loved them, and on more than one occasion she'd been in hysterics over their slightly twisted takes on the classic fairy tales.

Of course, there had been the few parents of her boys' friends that hadn't exactly been that thrilled over finding out just how different their imaginations were, but that was okay. Not everyone had a sense of humour and decency like most people did.

What Sara had loved though, was watching her sons and her brother bond. Jasper and Damian had never exactly been all that good at talking to new people, and even when they'd been excited to meet their Uncle Bickslow, Sara hadn't expected them to be so comfortable so quickly. Whenever they met someone new, they were always shy and reserved and a little quiet for a while. But with Bickslow, they'd just been their normal selves and they'd pretty much attached themselves to Bickslow once he'd walked into their living room. All they'd been doing so far was telling their outrageous stories while she and her husband, Rory, talked to Lucy and got to know her – and Bickslow, when he wasn't too preoccupied by his nephews' antics.

Though Sara had known Lucy had been just slightly more interested in watching Bickslow with Jasper and Damian, and Sara had quickly decided that she was going to need to ask if they would be giving _her_ any nephews or nieces in the future. It was only fair, of course. But she couldn't even ask that until Saskia was back from their store, because it would be just a little weird to ask if she was going to be getting any more kids to spoil the hell out of (and be given a reason to visit Magnolia every so often) before finding out just how in the hell they were back together in the first place.

That was all Sara wanted to know.

"Aunty Sara! Aunty Sara!"

Everyone in the room turned to look to the hall as a girl with dark blue hair ran into the room and straight for Sara, jumping up into her lap to give her aunt a big hug. "Hey, Layla." Sara kissed the top of the girl's head with a bright smile, and let her crawl over her lap and to her husband, before returning to the ground.

Both Bickslow's and Lucy's eyes went wide when they heard the name, and Bickslow couldn't help but steal a glance in Lucy's direction to see her reaction. Of all the names in the world for what Bickslow was safely assuming was his niece, it also had to be the name of Lucy's mother. When he only saw Lucy smiling softly to the girl who was only staring back at her in shock, he relaxed just a little, but he couldn't help but let out a quiet chuckle as a hand came up to rub at the back of his neck. _I guess that name can be taken off the list of possible future baby names…_

Had he ever told Lucy that he'd been thinking of random names for the last two weeks straight? No. He really didn't plan on it either. He hadn't thought of many, but Layla had been one of the first that had crossed his mind.

Bickslow looked back up just his other sister walked into the living room, and his tongue only lolled from his mouth again in his signature grin at the shocked expression on her face. "Evil One."

With Sara hiding her smile behind her hand and her husband appearing indifferent, Saskia looked quickly between the blonde on the lounge and her brother on the ground in front of his nephews. She was so far past confused she just didn't even know what to say, so instead she only quickly stepped into the room and crouched down beside Bickslow to quickly pull him into a hug. "Pixie! You're here!"

"That is _not_ my name, Sas," Bickslow mumbled.

"Yeah it is," Saskia giggled. She stepped over his legs to sit down on the lounge next to Lucy, and as she did so, she couldn't help but catch a glimpse of Lucy's hands folded on her lap over her crossed legs. Leaning over to the side slightly to gently nudge the blonde, Saskia said, "I like the ring, by the way." Was she just as confused as Sara was as to just how they were together? Of course she was, but it really didn't take a genius to work out that they were engaged.

She just, of course, really hoped she'd have it explained, because she was more than curious.

Smiling, Lucy replied, "So do I." Then, when she saw the small girl with the dark blue hair tied up in a ponytail hesitantly approaching her mother beside her, Lucy sat forward slightly on the lounge to smile at the nervous girl. "So this is your daughter?"

"Yup! She's usually not this shy though." Saskia said proudly, then she held out a hand for her daughter to take so she would come closer. Leaning down slightly, she turned Layla by the shoulders until she was facing Lucy, and softly said, "You know who this is, don't you, sweetie?"

Layla nodded and kept her eyes trained on the smiling blonde.

"Hi there," Lucy said softly to the girl as she leant down over her knees. "Your name is Layla, right?" The girl nodded, and Lucy's smile got brighter as she excitedly said, "That's a really pretty name, Layla. Almost as pretty as you, actually."

"Tha-Thank you," Layla said nervously as a dusting of rose covered her cheeks. She was only six (and recently six, actually), but she still had her idol, and she was sitting right in front of her and smiling at her. Ever since she saw Lucy in the X792 games, she'd been in love with her and on more than one occasion throughout the Grand Magic Games that year, which had been the second time Fairy Tail had competed but only the first time Layla had seen them at all, only being a few weeks shy of turning five at the time, she had pointed to Lucy and looked up to her mother and said that she wanted to be just like the pretty blonde lady when she grew up.

It didn't help that Lucy's spirits, of what she had seen when she'd been competing and of what she'd seen in the magazines her mother had shown her and read to her, were all more than adorable and Layla loved them all.

But for her idol to be sitting on her aunt's lounge next to someone who looked a lot like her mother and her aunt, it was something her young little mind couldn't comprehend!

Looking up to Saskia again, Layla asked, "Mama? Why is she here?"

"Well, Layla." Saskia smiled and pointed to Bickslow sitting on the floor, lifting his hand to wave to the girl. "Remember how Mama told you Aunty Sara and I have a baby brother?"

"Hey now, you're not that much older than me," Bickslow grumbled. They were originally only supposed to be four years older than him. He wasn't a baby. Or at least, he wouldn't be if he hadn't been frozen on an island for seven stupid years.

"Pixie," Sara interrupted, only making Bickslow's scowl deepen. "We're thirty-five at the end of the year. You're not even _twenty_ -five right now. You're always gonna be our baby brother whether you like it or not."

"I don't like it."

"We don't care," Saskia giggled, and settling back into the lounge and crossing one leg over her knee, she watched Layla slowly and carefully walk towards Bickslow to be standing in front of him.

Bickslow only blinked as the girl stared at him. The twins had been easy – they'd just jumped straight into it and got into their stories that Bickslow honestly loved. But Layla? Layla was… Well, Bickslow didn't know. He just didn't know what to do.

"You look funny."

He blinked again, and had to refrain from reaching out to to shove (gently) Lucy's knee to stop her laughing. "Do I?" he asked Layla.

She nodded.

Shrugging and folding his arms across his chest, Bickslow said, "Well, so do you."

"You look funnier," Layla argued, folding her arms too and continuing to stare at her strange looking uncle who only stared back. When she unfolded her arms and stepped forward to climb up into his lap, he stared at her with wide eyes before the tip of her finger touched his nose and the mark across his face. "Why do you have a person on your face?" she asked curiously as she outlined the figure with her finger. All nervousness was long gone as everyone bar Jasper and Damian, who were too busy playing with their blocks, watched the two.

"Because I wanted a person on my face," Bickslow answered, shutting one eye when her finger got dangerously close to it. "Why don't you have one on your face?"

"It looks weird."

"I like being weird."

She dropped her hand away from his face then as her little mouth twisted into a tight line and huffed, and then stepped to the side to climb up onto the lounge he was leaning against. He tilted his head back to look up to her when she stood up on it, and winced slightly when her small hands tugged on a section of his hair at the back of his head.

"Your hair is funny too," Layla said as she continued to pull and part sections of his hair, completely messing it all up.

"So is yours."

"Nuh-uh. My hair is pretty. Mama says so."

"Well, Lucy says my hair pretty too."

"Hey, don't bring me into this," Lucy chimed in as she held up her hands defensively. Sure, she might really love her fiancé's hair, but she wasn't going to be taking sides when he was arguing with his six-year-old niece. Or at least, she wouldn't be taking _his_ side. No. She had to get on Layla's good side, after all, even if she had remembered Saskia saying that her daughter loved her from her performance in the guild's last time in the Grand Magic Games. "But seriously," she said as she reached out to the girl standing just next to her on the lounge for the long ponytail, letting the strands fall from her fingers as she dropped her hands back to her lap. "Layla definitely has the prettiest hair here. There's just no competition."

Bickslow looked to Lucy with a frown and a pout just to see her giggling along with his sisters and Layla looking up to her with adoration and a smile that reminded him so much of his mother. "What? Aw, come on, Luce," Bickslow whined. "You're supposed to be taking my side, you know."

"I can take whoever's side I want, darling."

"No you can't. You marrying me means you're supposed to be on my side and always say that my hair is prettier."

Sticking her tongue out at Bickslow, an act that only made Bickslow stop dead and have him fighting not to burst out laughing, Layla proclaimed proudly, "Lucy likes me more than Uncle Pixie."

"Oh my fu— _freakin'_ god…"

"Hey, careful, Bicks," Saskia said.

Only sighing dejectedly and dropping his head to rest in his palm, he mumbled, "Fine, sorry." He forgot that he wasn't allowed to swear around the kids. They didn't like that kind of thing.

With Layla sitting next to her, feeling comfortable next to her idol who said her hair was pretty and her slightly weird uncle, Lucy suddenly looked down to the girl with a wicked smirk that only Bickslow would be able to tell what it meant, and she leant down to gently nudge the girl with her elbow. "Hey, Layla," she said quietly. "You wanna make Uncle Pixie's hair prettier?" She still had no idea where the name _Pixie_ had come from yet, but that didn't mean she wasn't going to use it. Oh no. She loved it too much.

"Yes!"

Lucy reached into her purse sitting next to her, ignoring the suspicious look Bickslow was now giving her, and she pulled out a whole bunch of tiny rainbow elastic bands. "I bet you could do all sorts of things with these!" Another peal of laughter slipped past her lips as Layla scrambled back behind Bickslow and stood on the edge of the cushion. As Bickslow's fiancée, it was Lucy's job to make his life a living hell, and that just meant giving his niece the tools to make him prettier.

Or not, because he was getting his hair done by a six-year-old. But still. It was her job to do that kind of thing, and when Bickslow only lifted up his hand to hold the elastic bands for Layla so she could easily reach for the next one when she needed it, Lucy was realising just that little bit more that waiting for the day when they had their own child was going to one hell of a wait. Also, that she was really, seriously hoping that they had at least one girl. Bickslow was going to need his own mini hairdresser just like Layla.

"Now," Sara said with a clap of her hands as she placed her cup back down on the coffee table. "You two need to explain just how it is you got back together and managed to get engaged in the space of like two months."

Lucy tore her gaze away from Layla who was pulling and twisting sections of Bickslow's hair into tiny little ponytails and tying them up with the colourful bands, and to his sister sitting opposite them. "Uh, well…" She looked back down to Bickslow for just a moment to see him wince as Layla grabbed another fistful of hair. "Am I telling this story or are you?"

"You," Bickslow answered. "I'm a little busy. Can't you see I'm getting my hair done?"

"I can see that," she laughed, then sat up again to look to each other person in the living room with a quiet sigh and a shrug. "Well, it's actually not that long of a story at all. After a friend of ours, Natsu, crashed the games—"

"Is that the one that set fire to the entire arena?" Sara's husband, Rory, asked.

Lucy nodded. "Yup. Straight after that, we headed back to Magnolia. I went with Natsu, since he's been my best friend since I joined the guild, and Bicks came back a little while later with his own team when they heard Fairy Tail was reforming."

"So you didn't run into each other in Crocus?" Saskia asked.

"No, but I was sitting on the opposite side of the arena to her at the games, apparently," Bickslow said, then narrowed his eyes slightly to glare at his sister from the corner of his eyes, trying not to turn his head too much. "And I'm still mad at you for not telling me you two talked to Lucy literally minutes before you saw me."

Sara and Saskia shared a guilty look and they shrugged in sync with matching smirks. "Didn't wanna upset you, baby brother," Sara chuckled at her scowling brother.

"Anyway," Lucy continued with her own quiet laugh escaping. "We ended up meeting up when they got back because we uh… We had some things to talk about. Then, I was out of town for the next few weeks, and then he just um… Proposed, I suppose, despite the fact I was covered in bandages and bruises and had _just_ woken up."

"That's kinda romantic," Saska sighed. "Surprising you like that."

"I think I am literally the only person in the entire world who doesn't think it was romantic at all," Bickslow grumbled, wincing again when Layla continued pulling on his hair and tying it up as many times as she could manage.

Sara arched a blue eyebrow and stared at Bickslow. "Alright. How was it not romantic then?"

"Because when I went over there, I hadn't planned on proposing _at all_."

"Yet you had a ring," Rory stated.

"Well… No."

"Did you get the ring later then?" Saskia asked. Bickslow just continued to look more and more embarrassed, and he shook his head. "Then what? Unless that _isn't_ an engagement ring Lucy's wearing."

"O-Oh, no. It is," Bickslow mumbled. "It just uh… It wasn't exactly in my possession at the time."

"Okay…?"

Lifting a hand just to try and pull the few strands of hair at the nape of his neck from the bottom ponytail Layla had tied in his hair free, Bickslow mumbled, "Lucy had it."

"Huh?"

Sighing, and feeling just a little bad for Bickslow having to explain the situation over the silly ring, Lucy said, "Bickslow sent me the ring for my birthday, right before the start of the games."

Saskia and Sara looked to Lucy, and then to Bickslow with a deadly glare. He only grunted when Sara flung a small pillow at his face, and he flinched when they both shouted, "Are you a moron?!"

"Hey, come on." He took the pillow and only folded his arms around it as he scowled at Sara. "It wasn't exactly like I'd thought I'd ever see her again after we broke up, and I'd been carrying the stupid thing around for nearly a year and it was getting annoying, okay?"

Both of their faces softened then, and with just a small smirk, Saskia leant forward around Lucy to poke Bickslow's shoulder. "So you planned on asking her to marry you, and _then_ broke up with her?" A bark of laughter escaped before she said, "Nice one, Pixie."

"Shut up, _ass_."

"Language."

"Sorry…"

"But really," Sara chimed in suddenly as she looked up from her boys still happily playing (and attempting to poke each other's eyes out). "It is just a little romantic. Obviously not planning on asking her but then doing so after you'd only seen her what, twice? Since getting back to Magnolia."

Nodding, Saskia agreed, "I think so too. It really doesn't have to be a grand gesture to be romantic."

"See? You just need to accept that it was romantic, Bickslow," Lucy laughed as she flicked one of the tiny ponytails on the side of his head. "You should listen to me sometimes, you know."

"Yeah, yeah. No need to rub it in."

"Set a date yet though?" Rory asked suddenly.

Lucy nodded quickly. "Yup. 25th August."

"What?" Saskia's brow wrinkled and she looked to them in shock. "But that's a year away! You can get engaged without even being together, or at least I'm guessing that's what happened, but you want to wait a year to actually get married? Why wait?"

"Because August 25th is special to us," Bickslow answered with a soft smile.

"How come?"

"We had our first date then," Lucy said.

"It was also the date I was _supposed_ to propose on," Bickslow added.

"And also the day he _did_ propose on."

Sara and Saskia turned into Mirajane Strausses so quickly it made Bickslow wonder just who the imposters were and what they had done with his evil sisters. He'd never known they were capable of making an _aww_ ing sound, but that's what they did. _Guess growing up and having kids and all that will change a person._

"So romantic!" Saskia cried.

"So, _so_ romantic!" Sara added, curling into her husband's side for good measure, seeming unaffected by his amused face. "So you'll be getting married three years from your first date then? That's so sweet."

Shrugging, Bickslow only glanced up at Lucy just behind him with a soft smile still, and said, "I suppose so." He didn't really care when they got married, to be honest. He wouldn't care if it was the next week, two weeks or even months from then, or even two _decades_ from then. All that mattered to him was that he knew he would be with Lucy for the rest of his life, and that meant the most to him, no matter how excited he actually was about marrying her and being able to have a life with her.

But maybe it really was time to accept that it was just a little romantic and sweet that everything seemed to revolve around that one date, and not all of it had been intentional.

* * *

Bickslow lowered himself into the rose-scented bubble bath with a groan, and he leant back against Lucy and slid down the bath until he was sitting lower than the blonde. It wasn't exactly how they usually did it, but Bickslow wasn't going to complain that much.

"Those kids really did a number on you, huh?" Lucy giggled as she sat up, quickly beginning to work on pulling out all of the tiny little elastic bands that had Bickslow looking like some blue hedgehog.

He winced each time she managed to pull one out. "Yup."

They'd spent almost the entire day at Sara's house with his sisters and their kids, and it had truly been a great day. Most of that time, Bickslow had been playing with them, and it warmed his entire being to know that they actually liked him. He hadn't wanted to leave when they had in the evening, but the promise that he'd be able to see his nephews and his niece again before they went back home made Bickslow feel just a little bit better about having to pry himself away from their little arms and tight hugs.

From making Damian's and Jasper's blocks stack and arrange themselves with the help of the babies, to being Layla's own personal guinea pig when it came to practicing to become a hairdresser, apparently. Bickslow hadn't minded any of it in the slightest though. Not even when Lucy summoned a few of her spirits – Loke, Aries, and Gemini – for Layla throughout the afternoon, and Aries made a giant wool bouncy-castle for all of them to play in. He'd been jumped on, trampled on, sat on, had his hair pulled more than he was used to… But he'd loved each second of it.

Especially when Loke seemed to decide that Layla was his new favourite princess. That had made his niece very, very happy, and made Bickslow just that little bit less worried about Loke stealing his future wife. Bickslow had realised that Loke wasn't exactly on 'Team Bickslow and Lucy Forever and Ever' anymore after leaving a year earlier. Bickslow didn't exactly blame him either, but that's just the way it was.

"I didn't think little kids could hurt so—Ow, Luce!"

"Sorry," Lucy giggled again when she pulled another one of the bright elastic bands from his hair, only dropping it to the growing pile of bands on the edge of the tub complete with a few strands of straight blue hair. "They're hard to get out and she did them really tight."

"I know she did," Bickslow mumbled, wincing again when another was pulled out. He tilted his head back over her shoulder to look to her with a slight scowl and said, "And _you're_ the one that gave them to her."

"So she could make your hair prettier."

"My hair is pretty enough, thank you very much."

A pat to his spiky head, the elastic bands having been in for far too long, had him scowling as Lucy laughed again. "I know it is, sweetheart. I know it is."

Rolling his eyes, Bickslow sank down into the bath some more and instead just stared down to the mountains of bubbles that the babies were playing in down the other end and between his feet, occasionally coming back up from beneath the water with the bubbles still on the top of them. Each time Lucy pulled out another one of the elastic bands, he winced again and the number went up in his head for just how many he'd had in in the first place. He was already up to twenty-seven and he was beginning to get a headache from all the hair pulling.

"All done."

He almost sighed in relief when Lucy dropped the last neon green band to the pile with the rest of them, and Bickslow lifted his hands from where they were on the edge of the tub to run them through his hair, trying his best to smooth out and separate each little section.

Pulling one of them between her fingers, Lucy couldn't contain her laughter as she watched Bickslow try to sort out his hair. "Maybe you should leave it like this and dye the tips blond."

Bickslow huffed a laugh as he rolled his eyes again. "Yeah, because that would look downright fucking sexy."

"Mm, it would," Lucy murmured.

"A blue, black, and blond-haired hedgehog… _Thing_. Maybe you'd have some competition if I did that. I'd have women all over me all the time."

"That's okay, because at the end of the day…" Lucy sat up again just to rest her chin on his shoulder, and she turned her head to quickly press a kiss to his cheek when he tipped his head back. "I know that you're all mine."

"Damn right I am. But can we switch places now? Because this is getting really uncomfortable."

Lucy rolled her eyes as her hands gripped the edge of the tub, and she slowly stood up to climb out of it before stepping back into it in front of Bickslow. "Oh, fine," she mumbled. Lowering herself down into the perfectly warm water, a contented hum left her lips again when she leant back and settled herself against Bickslow's chest. That was _much_ better and much more comfortable, and she could probably very easily fall asleep in that tub.

Or, she could have, if Bickslow wasn't suddenly playing with her hair for whatever reason. She turned her head to look up to see the amused smirk on his face as he held the ends of her dripping hair over his hand. "What are you doing?"

"Maybe _you_ should dye the ends of your hair blue," Bickslow mused with his smirk only turning into a wide grin. "I'd dye mine blonde if yours was blue."

She pulled the strands of golden hair from his hand and pulled the rest around to her front. "No. Definitely not," Lucy scoffed.

"Pink then?"

"No way."

"Purple."

"No."

"Black?"

"Bicks, I'm not dyeing my hair," Lucy laughed as she swatted his hand away from her hair again.

"Why not? You'd look hot with two-toned hair," Bickslow insisted, only dropping his chin to rest on her shoulder and murmur in her ear, "Get the piercings and tattoos to go with it, too. You've already got the badassery down-pat."

Lucy hummed in thought as she sank further into the water and let the bubbles sitting on the surface get closer to her chin, and she lifted up a hand when she felt a small object nudge it beneath the surface of the water. She couldn't help but laugh when she saw Pippi covered in bubbles sitting in her hand, and with a gentle push the totem flew up and shook itself free of the bubbles before diving back down to join the other four, who Lucy could feel moving around and bumping into places she really wished they wouldn't sometimes.

But black hair, god knows how many piercings, and tattoos to go with it? Lucy was convinced it would not suit her in the slightest, even if she supposedly was a badass. Which, she really didn't think she was. Not really, anyway. Leaning back again against Bickslow's shoulder, her lips quirked with her amusement, and she wondered aloud, "So you think I'm a badass, huh?"

"Mm-hmm. Sexiest badass I know."

"Is that so?"

"Yup. And you're the _second_ sexiest _smartass_ I know, too," Bickslow added

Her eyebrow arched curiously as she took note of the gleam settling in his eyes. That was never a good sign, because it usually meant that her fiancé was up to something, and she had seen that look far too many times. "Only the second?" she mumbled, her bottom lip sticking out slightly. "Who's the first?"

"Me, of course," he answered, his tongue lolling from his mouth as he laughed at his own joke. Of course he was the sexiest smartass he knew. If sexy smartass was in a dictionary, Bickslow was sure it would be with a picture of him.

Sighing, Lucy turned back to the front as she lifted a leg out of the water and watched the suds roll down, and said, "Alright, I'll let you have that one."

"How kind of you," Bickslow chuckled. Then, dropping his head again, as he lightly kissed the side of her neck down to her shoulder as his arms dipped into the water to wrap around her, he added, "But there is one category you'll always be first in."

"And what's what?"

"Greatest ass."

"I already knew that," she smirked.

"Nuh-uh," he mumbled, his lips still turned up into his smirk against her shoulder.

"Yes," Lucy insisted with a bubbly laugh. "You tell me that almost every time you see me naked."

"Well, it's true. So I'll tell you again since you're very much naked right now." Granted, Bickslow was realising that he probably did compliment her on her assets just a little bit too much, considering how long they'd been together in the past, but sometimes, he just couldn't help himself. Sometimes he just really needed to say it, because holy fuck was Bickslow _still_ trying to understand just how he'd ended up with her again after everything he'd done. Bickslow was just trying to accept that he really didn't think he would ever know just what it was he'd done to deserve to have her back in his life, and for good that time, because he was almost convinced that he didn't deserve her at all.

It didn't matter how many times she had told him otherwise over the time they'd been together, Bickslow would always feel that way. He still thought that there were so many other better people out there for her; people that wouldn't hurt her like he had _more than once_ before.

He still hadn't forgiven himself for the time he'd been a total jackass to her when they'd first met, even though it had been so many years earlier. He had accepted that it had happened and that it was in his past, but he hadn't forgiven himself for it. If he could go back to that time, he wouldn't do any of it again, and he knew that Laxus, Freed, and Evergreen all felt the same. They'd all changed so much since then, but it still hurt _them_ the most, even if they'd long since received the forgiveness from everyone they'd hurt.

And then when he'd left her, just a year earlier… Bickslow would never, _ever_ forgive himself for that. Never. Not even if he was immortal and he lived until the end of time itself. He should have stayed with her, not left her. That was here he had always belonged, not off on some edge of the country and wondering just what it was she was doing and if she was okay. He should have stayed and _made sure_ she was okay, because it had been the one time that she should not have been alone, but she was.

And for that, Bickslow hated himself. If it was one thing Bickslow knew he deserved, it was how miserable he'd been over the last year. He'd accepted that it wouldn't have gotten better without Lucy, but he had deserved every single second of misery he'd been in.

He was still more than thankful to have Lucy back in his life, because he really was never going to be stupid enough to ever let go of her again, and he was just a little glad that she'd been able to see parts of Fiore she hadn't before and she'd been able to have some sort of life outside of the guild… But he almost wished she hadn't had to do any of that all. He regretted leaving so much it really did hurt, but when he thought back to all of the stories that Lucy had told him over the last couple of weeks about her year, Bickslow almost wished he'd been doing all of that with her.

Travel the country and the world, see everything and do everything… Bickslow would gladly do that with Lucy. Hell, he'd pack up his life and follow Lucy to the end of the world if that was what she wanted. As long as Bickslow had Lucy by his side for the rest of his life, he didn't have any cares in the world about what they did.

Leave the guild, pack up everything, travel the world and find somewhere to settle down and really start their life together. That was something Bickslow would gladly do, if Lucy would want that. He doubted she did, because Fairy Tail was her home and her family, but that was still something he would do, all because he just wanted to be with her. The guild was his family too and it always would be, but Lucy was more than that.

Lucy was… _Home_. Not so much Magnolia. Wherever she was, that's where home was to Bickslow. It didn't matter whether they were in Magnolia, or even Fiore. Just… Wherever she was, that's where he would be too. That was the way things always should've been, but even then, Bickslow could still be glad that things were falling into place around them and were returning to the way they always should have been.

But when Bickslow turned his head to look out the window just next to the stone tub yet again, he was reminded once again that Lucy had had a life there. Crocus. She'd had a job, and friends, and a life… But she'd traded all of it in a heartbeat to help the guild get back on its feet.

"Do you ever think about leaving the guild?"

Lucy tilted her head back to look back up to Bickslow behind her. "No, why?" Lucy asked quietly, her brow becoming furrowed as Bickslow continued to stare out through the window to the country's capital around them. "Where is that even coming from?"

"I don't know," Bickslow mumbled. "I just… I just look around right now, and then I remember that all of this was your life just a couple of months ago."

"But it's not the life I was happiest with," Lucy reminded him.

Frowning, he looked down to Lucy. "So you don't regret leaving any of this for the guild?"

"Not one tiny bit."

"Are you sure? 'Cause you know that if you did, if you wanted to move back here or anything and have a _normal_ kind of life, then I'd come with you without a moment's hesitation."

With a gentle sigh, Lucy spun herself around in the bath and dispersed what was left of the bubbles in the near lukewarm water, and she looked back to Bickslow with a soft smile as her hands lifted from the water to hold his face between her hands. "Bickslow, I really don't want to move back here. Or move anywhere else, for that matter," she insisted. "Magnolia is where I will _happily_ live the rest of my days, and the only way I'll be leaving Fairy Tail again is if they kick me out or we disband again, and I am really, _really_ hoping that neither of those happen. Especially the latter."

The corner of Bickslow's mouth lifted up into a small smile as he nodded and said, "Yeah, me too."

"You know our kids are going to grow up in Fairy Tail, right?"

 _That_ seemed to make Bickslow perk up quickly, and the bright and hopeful smile that Lucy loved so much was quickly replacing the slight frown. "Yeah?" he whispered.

Lucy nodded. "Uh-huh. Mages or not, they'll be honorary members of Fairy Tail and welcomed into our giant, crazy family with open arms."

"They will be, won't they?"

"Of course they will be, and we won't be able to let Mira and Ever spoil them to death if we don't live in Magnolia, will we?"

A huff of laughter escaped Bickslow's lips, and he nodded slowly. "I guess not." Mira spoiling the hell out his kids was already a given, and Evergreen was no doubt going to want to turn their future daughter (the one that Bickslow _really_ wanted) into a fairy lover like she was. He'd still be the one to spoil them the most, because they'd forever be his babies… But it just wouldn't be the same if they weren't in Fairy Tail.

Magnolia and being in Fairy Tail was where they both belonged, and it was where they would happily live out the rest of their days with their family. Bickslow knew that.

* * *

"Oh, before I almost forget…" Bickslow turned away from the front door of Saskia's house and crouched down to pick up the bag he had on the ground, all packed and ready for their trip back to Magnolia. Pulling out a large black box, he crouched down in front of the twins, Jasper and Damian, and opened up the lid for them to see inside. "These are for you."

Inside the box were two matching sets of plain tikis, ten of them in total resting against the light blue fabric that lined the box and each of them without faces, ready for Bickslow's nephews to paint their own faces onto so they weren't _exactly_ like Bickslow's.

Seeing their light green eyes light up even more – something that they'd most definitely gotten from their mother and grandmother – had Bickslow almost grinning ear to ear. "I know you guys liked playing with the babies, and I know that the babies liked being stacked up and all too," Bickslow explained as the twins each pulled a totem from the box. "These ones won't make any rude comments or stack themselves up, but I just wanted to get these for you since you liked them. And, you'll be able to give them their own little faces if you want to, so they'll be all yours. There's even some paint and some brushes at the bottom of the box for you to use if your mum lets you make a mess."

He barely had a chance to put the box on the ground before he had his two nephews jumping forward and throwing their arms around him. "Thank you, Uncle Bicks!" Jasper said excitedly from one side.

"They're so cool!" Damian added from the other.

"You're very welcome. I'm glad you guys like them," Bickslow said softly as he hugged the twins back, the smile never leaving his face.

They'd only been in Crocus for a few weeks, mostly sorting out Lucy's apartment and packing up the things she wanted to take back to Magnolia, but there'd been so many days where they'd been able to visit Bickslow's family and Lucy had been able to get to know them better and Bickslow had been able to catch up with them all and bond with his nephews and niece. He was so happy they'd seemed happy to welcome him back into their family even though he'd never met them – or known they'd existed until that long ago – and it only made him all the more excited for the day when his own children were that age. He'd had too much fun with them while they'd been there and he almost wished they weren't having to go back home.

Bickslow would miss them for sure. He'd even miss his sisters, but he'd miss the kids more, and Bickslow knew Lucy would too. Layla had grown rather attached to Lucy, and Lucy with her. She was already _Aunt_ Lucy to the girl (and to the twins, too), and Bickslow didn't know who loved it more – him, or Lucy. If Bickslow had had any doubts about Lucy being a great mother to their own kids, they were long gone after watching her with his nephews and niece. He almost thought they liked her more than they did him, and he wouldn't have even cared if that was the case.

Lucy had even gone as far as finding someone in Crocus to make up some copies of her spirit keys – both gold and silver – so she could give them to Layla, and all morning, Layla had been playing with them and doing her best to impersonate her Aunt Lucy. She knew they didn't open any gates, but she still loved them, just like Jasper and Damian loved their new totems, because they were gifts from their Aunt Lucy and Uncle Bickslow, and they were just as sad to see them go home as Bickslow and Lucy were to be going home themselves.

But as much as they wanted to stay, they had to go. It was a long journey home, and they'd only had time to come visit one final time. They didn't know when they'd be able to come back next, but they had both decided they would definitely have to make time to visit Crocus every now and then.

Standing up and watching Jasper and Damian turn down the hall with the tikis in their hands and handing the box with the rest of them to Sara, Bickslow sighed and looked behind him to where Lucy was stepping away from Layla. "Do I get a hug too?" Bickslow pouted before crouching down again and holding out his arms for the blue-haired girl.

Layla was the saddest of them all over her aunt and uncle leaving, but it was mostly because of Lucy.

When Bickslow stood again and threw his bag that was by the door over his shoulder again, Layla went back to Saskia's side and looked up at her with sad eyes. "Mama, will Aunt Lucy and Uncle Pixie be coming back?" she asked, just a little hopeful.

"Of course we will," Bickslow answered with a smile. "We'll come visit again soon. You could always come visit us in Magnolia though. It's not as big as Crocus, but it's a nice place and there's a really nice park there you'd all love."

"Oh! Mama, can we?" Layla bounced up and down excitedly.

"We'll see, kiddo," Saskia laughed.

"You'll see Magnolia one day though," Lucy chimed in as she knelt down on the ground in front of the girl again and reached up to fix the ribbon that held her side-pony in place – something she'd gotten from Lucy. Seeing her only blink in her confusion, Lucy smiled and added, "I'll need a flower girl when I get married, so you'll have to come to Magnolia then."

"R-Really?"

Lucy nodded. "Really." It was a given that Bickslow's entire family was invited to their wedding, and even if it was still a year away and she was sure her friends would eventually take over in the planning, she could still decide on some things… Like who the flower girl would be. She was Bickslow's niece and she was an adorable little girl, so she was perfect for the job.

"Well, I think we'll still be able to find another reason to visit Magnolia before then," Sara said. "Right, Sas?"

"I think we'll be able to," Saskia agreed as she looked down to Layla with her great big smile. She was just so excited to be Lucy's flower girl and go and visit her aunt and uncle. "But we won't have anyone to go and visit if they're here though, so Aunt Lucy and Uncle Pixie need to go home."

"That we do," Bickslow mumbled. He really didn't want to, but they had to. Magnolia was their home after all, not Crocus. That was part of the reason they'd been there at all – to get everything sorted out so Lucy could move in with him finally.

As they said their goodbyes, Bickslow was telling himself that they'd be back. Soon, hopefully, even if it was just for a few days. It was a long way to Crocus from Magnolia but he'd do it just to see his family, especially the twins and Layla. And so with the front door of Saskia's house closed behind them as they made their way down the steps, Bickslow looked down to Lucy as she tucked herself into his side as they walked.

"I think that if we didn't have the guild and all that," Lucy said softly as they headed towards where they needed to go to get out of the city. "I wouldn't mind moving to Crocus. Our kids would be close to their cousins, and we'd always be able to go and visit everyone like Laxus and Levy and all that anyway."

Bickslow smiled. "Yeah, I guess that would be nice, growing up with family."

"Yeah… _But_ , Magnolia is home. We have family there too, since the guild is our family as well. I still want us to raise our kids there when it happens, but if anything ever happened that had the guild no longer existing, I think Crocus would be a nice place to call home."

"But Magnolia is home," Bickslow repeated softly. Or wherever Lucy was, really, but if Lucy thought Magnolia was home, then that's where it was.

"Magnolia is home."

* * *

 **A/Ns:** _Let's see how many stories I can slip Deadpool references into, shall we? No, seriously... This won't be the only one I do. I will say that HIMY will have a fair few at some point, and so will Neighbours From Hell.  
_

 _Also, I know I didn't explain Bix's nickname from his sisters, but I didn't think I needed to. But, if it wasn't that obvious (not that I was trying to make it that obvious either), in full, it is Bixy the Pixie._

 _Anyway. I hope you liked this chapter! I decided to keep this one mostly fluffy because of all the angst and misery that has been in the last few, and it was actually fun writing Layla because she's adorably sassy (and no, it is not the only story of mine where Bix has sassy children, or nieces... It's a thing)._

 _Review if you liked it! I love reading them, because you're all amazing. Until next time._

 _\- April_


	48. Chapter 48

"I'm pregnant!"

Bickslow stared wide-eyed, then finally blinked, then he looked to the blonde beside him who seemed to be as stunned as he was, then looked back to Levy and Gajeel opposite them. "Huh?"

Excitedly, Levy continued, "Gajeel and I are having a baby!"

Just like that, Lucy was quickly shooting up from where she sat and rushing around the table to pull the Script mage into a tight hug, and squealing quickly ensued. "Oh, that's amazing!" Lucy squealed. "This is great news, Levy! I'm so excited for you!"

Taking that as his cue to actually say something, Bickslow managed to pull himself out of his stupor long enough to raise his glass to Gajeel. "Congrats, man," he said quietly. "I'm happy for you both."

…But he wasn't. Well, he was, but not really. Bickslow knew he should have been as excited as Lucy was for Gajeel and Levy, but he just couldn't bring himself to be. They'd only gotten back from Crocus that same night and were stopping by the guild for a little while before heading home, but never once had Bickslow expected that within twenty minutes of walking into the guild and sitting down with Gajeel and Levy and greeting everyone quickly, that two of their bests friends would be telling them they were having a baby. That was really the last thing he expected to be hearing, and for a moment, he'd thought that he was just exhausted from the trip back to Magnolia and he hadn't actually heard Levy correctly.

Deep down, Bickslow was happy for them though. Everyone they were friends with seemed to be getting to the stage in their lives where they were ready to start settling down, or were at least getting there, now that the guild was back and everything was returning to the way things had always been. Bickslow didn't mind it though, because that was where he and Lucy were at too – they were getting their lives back on track and sorting everything out, and in Bickslow's case, he was really more than ready to really settle down and actually start a family. He just had to wait for that though, because it really did only seem fair to wait until the actual _mother_ of his future children was ready to go through some form of hell.

But even if he thought he was well and truly ready to have his own children, it still kind of hurt. They didn't talk about Lucy losing the baby before, and that was fine, whether it was a good idea or not. Lucy just needed to move past it and stop blaming herself again, and that was what Bickslow needed her to do too. But… It hurt when he thought about it, and he'd been thinking about it far more than he should.

He still didn't blame Lucy, and he had nothing to forgive her for, but sometimes, he was always just coming back to the thought that if things had been different, they would already have their baby and they'd be a family. That hurt, and it hurt Bickslow more than he knew it should. He didn't need to tell Lucy that though, because even when they weren't talking about it, she knew how he felt. There was just nothing she could do about it, and Bickslow knew that too.

What Bickslow needed was time. Lucy had had time, and now Bickslow needed it too.

But as much as he loved his friends and he was happy for them, he almost wished he wasn't hearing their exciting news, and he felt horrible for it, too. First it had been hard going near Laxus and Mira's son – and it still was, even though Bickslow hadn't seen Laxus since before they'd left for Crocus – because it only seemed to make him long for his own family all the more, and now it was Gajeel and Levy starting theirs, too.

He was just envious of them, really, and that sucked. Bickslow hated himself for it, because it was the one thing he _shouldn't_ be feeling. But he really just couldn't help himself.

"I wanted to tell you before you went to Crocus," Levy explained, the words coming out of her mouth at a million miles per hour – so fast that Bickslow actually had trouble deciphering them, but Lucy seemed to have no problems. "But then Gajeel said to wait because you were going to go see Bickslow's family, which you'll have to tell me all about tomorrow, by the way. And then there was all that with… With…"

 _With the baby…_

Only sensing the quickly growing discomfort as Levy trailed off, with Lucy's smile faltering for just the barest of the seconds, and Bickslow trying his best to seem like he really wasn't bothered by anything at all, Gajeel added, "The kid'll be here around the end of May, by the looks of it." Part of Gajeel's reasoning behind getting Levy to wait was because he was worried about Bickslow. Not so much Lucy, because he knew from Levy that she had coped with her loss over the year, but Bickslow wasn't.

Gajeel knew he was trying to, but he could still remember visiting the Seith mage after he'd talked to Lucy the first time since they'd both returned to Magnolia, and that hadn't been all that long ago – barely two months. That hadn't been long enough for Bickslow to cope like Lucy had, because Gajeel knew for certain that it had hurt the man more than he let on. He could barely even go near Laxus if Jax was in the vicinity, and Gajeel knew why.

That was why Gajeel had wanted to wait. At least a little while, anyway. Half of the guild had found out about their news in the two weeks Bickslow and Lucy had been gone (courtesy of Jet and Droy getting far too excited), so they'd been bound to find out about it pretty quickly anyway. But for a little while, Gajeel just wanted to make his friend's life as painless as possible, because he'd been through a hell of a lot and he deserved to be getting his life back on track with Lucy.

They both did.

"Oh, that's wonderful," Lucy crooned. She had planned on asking Levy to be her maid of honour once their wedding wasn't a good eleven months away, and if she was due before then, then it was perfect. Of course, Lucy wouldn't have had any issues with Levy being a heavily pregnant bridesmaid (assuming she even wanted to be), but it would still be nice if she'd already had her baby.

Plus, Lucy would get to play with an adorably perfect baby (of course Levy's baby was going to be perfect, just because Levy was her best friend) on her wedding day, and before then, even, and that made her incredibly happy. She wasn't having her own just yet, and she didn't really know when she would – though with Bickslow being the way he was, Lucy was sure she'd end up wanting to start trying sooner than she originally planned – have her own, but her friends' children were fine for the time being.

But even if Lucy was truly over the moon for two of her best friends, she knew Bickslow wasn't, even from just a few glances. She knew him, and she knew when something wasn't right, and Lucy had a feeling that she knew exactly what it was. Lucy left it until they were home though, because she was guessing that Bickslow wasn't exactly going to open up to even her without a little bit of reluctance. So when Bickslow didn't say a single word on their way home, Lucy wasn't all that surprised. He'd been mostly quiet in the guild while she had talked to Levy, only saying a few words every now and then before disappearing to the bar to go talk to Erza of all people, and she could deal with that. But once they were home, she wasn't going to. She needed Bickslow to talk to her.

When the apartment door was closed behind them, Lucy didn't wait a single moment before she said, "You've been awfully quiet tonight."

Bickslow shrugged as he went straight down the hall, not bothering to turn on any lights in the living room or kitchen. "Just tired," he answered quietly as he'd already begun pulling off his shirts.

"I understand that, because I'm tired, too," Lucy said slowly, following him down to the bedroom, and it didn't surprise her in the slightest that by the time she was in the room, he'd already managed to change out of the clothes he'd been wearing that day and was in just his sleep pants and closing a drawer. He somehow rivalled Gray when it came to getting clothes off. "But I think there's something else bothering you."

"It's fine. Don't worry about it."

Lucy was then wrapping her arms around his waist until she had her hands clasped behind his back, and her chin was resting on his chest. He couldn't escape her if he tried right then, and he knew it as well as she did. "Pixie," she murmured.

He rolled his eyes. "I hate that name so much."

"I love it," Lucy giggled. "I'm thinking I could go as a pixie for Halloween this year."

"Go ahead."

"I just might. But getting back to what's bothering you…"

"Lucy, it's fi—"

"I know it has something to do with Levy and Gajeel," she interrupted, and the way he avoided her eyes and the soft frown that settled on his lips only seemed to confirm Lucy's suspicions. "Talk to me, Bicks. Tell me what's wrong."

The worst part was that she almost sounded like she was pleading, and even at the best of times Bickslow was unable to resist her. But when she was like that, it was even harder. He told her everything, and she did the same with him. Sometimes, Bickslow actually thought Lucy knew him better than he knew himself, because sometimes, she was able to pick up on tiny little shifts in his behaviour that _he_ wasn't even aware of. She knew when something was wrong, but that was how Bickslow was with Lucy, too.

So of course she would know just what was bothering him. Bickslow knew that she'd picked up on that well and truly before they'd left the guild. That certainly didn't make it any easier for Bickslow though, because he didn't want her knowing how he truly felt. That was the last thing Bickslow wanted. "It really doesn't matter, I promise," he whispered, and he reached behind himself just to unclasp Lucy's hands.

She frowned when he pulled himself free and only walked around to the edge of the bed that had been made and unslept in for the last three weeks, and pulled back the comforter just to climb in and pull it over his head. In all the time she had spent with Bickslow before they'd separated, Lucy had learned that he rarely did something like that. He rarely needed his space or made it obvious that he did not want to talk about anything, but when he did, it only ever made Lucy worry and stress about just what it was that was eating him up inside.

Right then, it was no different. And even if he just wanted to forget about it and keep it to himself, Lucy didn't want him doing that. They talked about everything and anything, and what Bickslow was doing wasn't talking, and she didn't like that. After getting herself ready for bed – changing, brushing her teeth and her hair that she was seriously considering cutting – since it was late after all, and turning off the bedside lamps, she silently crawled into bed beside Bickslow. She didn't just close her eyes and ignore it like Bickslow wanted her to. Instead, she pulled the sheet and blanket up over her own head until she was cloaked in darkness, and pulled herself over to the warm body on the other side of the bed and curled herself around him as best she could. Considering the fact that he was quite obviously much larger than she was, it proved to be quite awkward, and it had Bickslow cracking an eye open and his brow furrowing slightly as he felt one slender leg wrap around his, her arm drape over his middle, and her forehead coming to rest at the nape of his neck.

"Tell me. Please," Lucy whispered then, and he almost shivered at the feel of her warm breath against the tip of his spine.

But Bickslow remained silent, and only stared blankly at the space in front of him.

Determined to get Bickslow to open up though, Lucy pressed, "It's because they're having a baby, yes?"

Nothing again.

"Are you not happy for them?"

That, Bickslow couldn't let Lucy believe. He couldn't let Gajeel and Levy believe that, either. "I am," he whispered.

"But…"

He sighed, and shook his head lightly against the pillow. "It doesn't matter. Just go to sleep. It's late and we need to start packing up your apartment tomorrow."

And Lucy was almost about to drop it then and just close her eyes, because Bickslow did have a point – they were supposed to start getting her apartment in Magnolia sorted out so she could move – but she knew she wouldn't have been able to sleep if she'd tried, not when she had too much bouncing around in her head right that. "You're not happy for them," she said suddenly, and she was sure she'd felt him tense slightly.

Why couldn't she just leave it? She was only bound to get hurt, and Bickslow didn't want to do that. It was why he didn't talk about the entire babies and kids thing anymore even though he was constantly thinking about it all, because he knew that it hurt her, whether she let it show or not. "Lucy, please, jus—"

"You're happy for them because they're our friends," Lucy continued, cutting Bickslow off quickly and forcing him to open his eyes again and glance over his shoulder. "But you're also not because it's them who are having a baby, and not us."

Sometimes, Lucy was just far too perceptive for her own good, and ordinarily, it was one of the things he liked the most about her. But right then, it wasn't, because he could hear the hurt in her voice, and that was exactly why he hadn't wanted her to know. It didn't matter how she would have found out, because the outcome still ended up being the same: Lucy would get hurt.

He knew her, and he knew that she wasn't as fine as those who knew about the miscarriage thought. The pain was still there, even if it had been a year since it had happened. She was just coping with it though. Nothing more and nothing less. Bickslow knew that, and he knew that she still blamed herself, even though she had accepted what had happened a long time ago.

But maybe she would always blame herself for what had happened a little bit, and maybe that pain would always be there – getting better, but never quite leaving. That's what Lucy had told him once before, anyway, when they'd actually been openly and willingly discussing everything, because actually talking about it all had been one of the things they had needed to do once they'd gotten back together. The conversation had hurt like hell for both of them, and many, many tears had been shed, but it had been good for them, too. She had said that she was still coping, and coming back and seeing him again had been a big part of why all of what she'd felt the year before was coming back to the surface again. She had admitted that it still hurt, but she'd also accepted that it was probably always going to hurt.

Bickslow had accepted that too, and they were both dealing with it the best way they knew how. They were just trying to move on from it, because neither liked the feeling of letting it take over their lives. But for Bickslow, it was hard to do that, even though it was what he needed to do. He needed to do that for Lucy, because her pain was far more important than his, and when he was being a jealous brat for no real reason, he needed to deal with it on his own and keep Lucy out of it.

But she already knew too much, and Bickslow didn't really know what else to do. She knew that he wasn't solely happy for two of their best friends, and that was enough. "Like I said," Bickslow began as he turned his head back to rest comfortably on the pillow. "It doesn't matter. I'm fine. Please, just don't worry about it anymore."

Lucy sighed and pulled herself up so she could lean forward and rest her chin on his shoulder. "But it does matter," she insisted quietly, and as she quickly pushed the blanket back so it wasn't over their heads and she could actually _breathe_ again, she whispered, "It's okay to be a little jealous, you know."

"No, it's not."

She smiled softly, and gripped his shoulder to roll him onto his back so she didn't feel like she was talking to a somewhat responsive brick wall. Lucy knew that Bickslow didn't want to talk, and she knew that quite well, but Bickslow needed to understand that he could still talk to her, even about how he was feeling then.

It hadn't taken Lucy much to know that her darling Seith mage was just a little jealous – or envious, really. She'd almost expected as much, once she had seen how he'd changed after hearing about Gajeel and Levy, but knowing that it really was about Bickslow being almost conflicted in regards to how he felt for them, Lucy knew for sure that it was what she thought.

It wasn't all bad though. Bickslow obviously thought it was far worse than she did, and Lucy didn't quite understand it. She wanted to though, just like she wanted to make Bickslow see that it wasn't the end of the world to be a little jealous, because in a way, she understood that and she felt the same.

"I think in your case, it's okay to feel that way," Lucy whispered, and even in the darkness of the room with the only light coming in through the open curtains, she could see just how conflicted he was.

"I really don't see how," Bickslow mumbled. "I shouldn't feel like that at all. I should just be happy for them, because you know, it's great that they are having a baby and they'll honestly be great parents…"

"But…"

"But…" That was the part Bickslow hated. There was more to it, because he was being a jealous brat and Lucy knew it. He didn't really know how to put how he was feeling into words though. Simply put, he was happy for them, but also not, but that just wasn't really enough. It didn't help that he just didn't want to talk about it either. So instead, he only groaned and let out an exasperated sigh as he reached behind his head for one of the pillows, and brought it down over his face to whine into it like the child he was at heart, "I just really want one."

Lucy laughed quietly as she sat up slightly just to pull the pillow away and tucked it back against the headboard. She'd honestly expected that to be what it was about, knowing that he was a bit envious, but she hadn't expected him to be so adorable. "I know you do, Bicks." Oh, did she know _just_ how badly Bickslow wanted a baby. Lying down on her side again, she dropped her head to rest on the pillow just next to Bickslow's. "And you'll have one eventually. Or maybe two, or even three since twins seem to run in your family. But one day, it'll be us telling everyone else that we're having a baby."

"I know that, and that day really can't come fast enough, but I just feel so stupid because of all of this. Everything just sucks, and I feel bad for it too, but I don't know how to stop thinking about everything."

"I'm sor—"

"You really need to stop apologising for everything, Lucy," he said softly as he quickly turned his head to look to her. She always did that, even though nothing was her fault. She was almost a compulsive apologiser, and Bickslow felt like _he_ was the one that needed to be apologising. He was the one that was making things worse for not only himself right then, but for Lucy too, which was what he'd wanted to avoid. But now…

Now, Bickslow knew it was too late for that, and deep down he seemed to know that it always would've ended up like that. He couldn't keep anything from her for long, so Lucy was bound to figure out how he felt eventually, and nothing would have changed by the time she did find out. He would still be happy but also not, and he'd still be envious of them and hate himself for it.

So maybe it was all for the best that they were talking about it right then, because at least that way, it would be out there and they wouldn't have to talk about it again. They could just put it behind them and continue trying to move on with their lives and find a way to make the pain as bearable and painless as possible.

Turning onto his side again, he gently pulled Lucy to him and wrapped his arms around her while wedging his knee between her legs to rest on the mattress. "You really don't have anything to apologise for."

"But I feel like I do sometimes," she said sadly. "I know how much you care about all of it and how much you want to start our family, and I almost wish that I could give you all of that. I know how happy you would be, if we were a family and we had a baby right now. And just imagining what our life would be like right now if we were actually a family only makes me think about how great of a dad you'd be."

"You think I'll be a good dad?"

Lucy nodded. "Yup!" She had hard proof that Bickslow would be a good dad, because she'd just watched him spend nearly three weeks with three of the most amazing children on the planet. But there was a chance she was a little biased. "The very best."

Bickslow doubted himself, because he really didn't have any experience with kids apart from a little bit of time spent with Asuka whenever the Raijinshuu got roped into babysitting her, and from his niece and nephews. But the one person who needed to believe that he'd be a good parent to their child when it was their turn to be parents did, and it was what Bickslow had needed to hear, and that surprised him a little.

"But…" Lucy continued after a moment, only letting Bickslow have that brief moment of happiness. "You know that I can't right now. I can't give you what you want and that makes me feel miserable sometimes because I just want to make you happy."

"It's okay, Lucy," he whispered. He brought a hand up to rest against her cheek, and he gently traced her cheekbone with his thumb. "I know, but it's fine, I promise. I'm happy."

"You'd be happier if we had a baby though."

"That's true," Bickslow admitted. "But we don't. Not _yet_ , anyway, and that's okay."

Lucy sniffled as she pulled all of her long hair to rest over one shoulder. "Is it, though? Because sometimes I don't think it is, and I know I probably shouldn't be thinking that, but I do." Lucy almost felt guilty that she wasn't ready to have a baby yet, but deep down, she knew that it was stupid. Just like she knew that right then at that exact moment in time was really not the right time for them to be having a baby. They still had some things to sort out, like moving, specifically, and then there was the issue of Lucy just not _wanting_ to have a baby just yet. Not like Bickslow did, anyway.

And it really did hurt Lucy sometimes when she did think about just how happy Bickslow would be if things were different. He was happy, she knew that, but at the same time, he wasn't. There was something missing that Bickslow needed to be truly happy, and they both knew exactly what it was.

But Bickslow knew all of it. He knew Lucy wasn't ready and that she didn't want a baby yet, and that was fine. It was okay, and he was truly okay with it. Deep down, Bickslow seemed to realise that he wasn't ready yet either, not completely, anyway. He wanted a baby more than anything, and he'd truly be over the fucking moon, but he knew it was for the best that they didn't have their family just yet. Neither were quite ready though, and they didn't need to talk about that to know that.

"I promise it's okay. You don't need to worry about me or feel guilty or anything like that," Bickslow whispered as he smiled softly. "I know we don't talk about this because it hurts and we're both just trying to move on – or at least, I am – but just this once I want to talk about it all, okay? Please?"

They already were anyway, so Lucy nodded silently.

"You know how I feel. Partly because you're some kind of genius, and partly because we've talked about all of this over the last few weeks and all," Bickslow said. "You know I want a baby. I'm not going to lie about that, because there's no need to. I don't even think you know _just_ how excited I am to have kids with you and start our family, because that's _all_ I think about now. Did I tell you that I started thinking of names, too? Because I did, and Layla was one of them because of your mother. It's a really great name and I thought that if we ever have a daughter, it would be a nice name to consider."

She smiled. "I thought the same, actually. But we obviously can't use that now, even if we do ever have a daughter."

"I know," Bickslow chuckled. "But… As much as a very big part of me wishes that we did have a kid right now, I'm also kinda glad we don't, because I really don't think _I'm_ even ready for one just yet, and I know you aren't either."

"So my boyfriend—"

"Fiancé," Bickslow corrected.

Lucy rolled her eyes and continued, "So my _fiancé_ , who has baby fever, really _really_ wants a baby, but also doesn't at the same time."

"Pretty much."

"You're an odd one, Pixie."

"But I'm _your_ odd one."

She giggled as their noses brushed against one another. Yeah, Bickslow was her odd one and she loved that. Lucy was glad that was how Bickslow felt though, because in a way, that was how she felt, too. She _did_ want to have a baby, and she was excited to start their family, though not as excited as Bickslow was, admittedly. But she really wasn't ready to just _yet_ , and she was glad that Bickslow wasn't either. It made her feel less guilty about wanting to wait, even though that was what was best for them, too. It was just far too early for them to actually be starting their family. They'd been back together for barely over a month, not even six weeks. That was just way too soon, and when they'd been together for a year before that, even that had been too soon, but getting pregnant then had never been part of her plan, either.

 _When_ they started their family, she wanted to be completely ready – or as ready as she was going to get, anyway. She wanted Bickslow to be ready, too, and she knew why he wasn't completely ready then either. He'd told her once before, just a few weeks earlier, that it was because he felt like he almost _missed_ what things could be like. He missed someone that hadn't had a chance to properly exist, and he missed the idea of what could have been at that exact moment. Lucy didn't blame him, because that was what Lucy had felt for a while after it had happened. She'd lost _everyone_ in such a short time, and she'd missed every single person she'd lost. That included the baby.

And to an extent, she still did. It wasn't as bad as it had been the year before, but it was still there. It was always going to be there though, because it was always going to have her wondering just what things would've been like at that exact moment if things had happened differently. And that, she knew Bickslow thought about, too. He _had_ to be, considering the way he felt, and right then, when they were actually talking about it all, Lucy wanted to know what Bickslow thought.

She wanted to know what he _saw,_ because it wouldn't have been the first time he'd seen and thought about their future family. Sighing contentedly as she laid her head on his chest and relaxed with the steady pace of his heartbeat, Lucy wondered aloud, "What do you think we'd be doing at this exact moment if I hadn't… you know?"

 _If you hadn't lost the baby._ Well, the truth was that Bickslow had thought about that. A lot more than he should have, anyway. "Well…" he began with his own thoughtful sigh. "I'm going to assume you would've told me you were pregnant once I was awake again."

"I'd wanted to wait for the perfect moment, but I would have told you then."

"So by now she'd be a few months old?"

Lucy hummed in thought for a moment before answering, "Maybe about five or six, I think." Then, looking up with a warm smile when she realised just what he'd said, Lucy asked, "And why a _she_?"

Bickslow shrugged, but couldn't keep the smile from his face. "I dunno. I hope we have a girl one day though, and I feel like she would have been one." Or maybe it would have been a boy if things had happened differently, which still would have been great, but it didn't really matter all that much anyway. "But I think we would be doing this."

"What? Cuddling?" Lucy giggled.

"Yup. 'Cause I'm pretty sure we'd be a little tired, having a baby and all, and I don't think being in bed by ten would be that unreasonable… Which is what we're doing right now and we don't even _have_ a kid to be running around after. I'm feeling just a little old right now."

"Oh, shush, you. You're only twenty-four."

"And you only just turned twenty a few months ago!" Bickslow laughed. His fingers gently dug into her side as he sat up and they traced up to under her ribs until she was a giggling, squirming mess beneath him, and tangling herself _and_ Bickslow up in the sheets all the more. "Do you remember when I used to sleep like all morning when we first started dating?"

Lucy continued to laugh as she pushed his hands away to get some sort of reprieve, and said, "Yeah, because you were lazy and you're _still_ lazy."

"Incredibly. But I just really happen to prefer the night hours, mmkay? Mornings are just so bland and boring."

"Remind me not to wake you up in the morning when I'm horny then," she giggled.

"Is it too late to take back what I just said? I _love_ mornings. Earlier I'm up, the better. Five o'clock in the morning is my favourite ti—"

She rolled her eyes and pressed a finger to his lips to silence him. "Too late, Pixie."

"Damn," he mumbled.

"But you know that when we _do_ eventually have a baby," Lucy began slowly. She dropped her head to rest on the pillow in front of Bickslow, and smiled softly as she continued, "You're not going to be able to sleep all day. You're not going to be able to sleep all _night_ , either."

He sighed heavily, and pulled her close to his chest again as he mumbled, "Yeah, I know. That might be _part_ of why I'm a little glad we don't have a baby yet. I will gladly get up in the middle of the night – or at least I won't complain about it too much – for midnight feedings and everything else, but right now, I don't want do that. At all."

"You like your sleep too much, huh?"

"Definitely. And do you know what I really want to do right now?"

"I'm hoping you're going to say sleep," Lucy mumbled.

He grinned, and leant forward to quickly press their lips together. "Sleep," Bickslow repeated. "And for a _loooong_ time because I am completely exhausted right now."

Lucy knew that feeling all too well, and she was already closing her eyes as Bickslow spoke. Their day had been incredibly long with all the travelling they'd done to get back from Crocus, and it felt far too nice to be back at home.

* * *

The next morning marked the first of many days where they would pack up all of Lucy's things that she would be taking with her to Bickslow's. When they finally got there and stood in her studio apartment with Bickslow yawning and drinking his take-away coffee from the café they'd had breakfast at, Lucy found herself just wondering where to begin.

She'd lived there for so many years, but never once had she had to actively sort through every single item she owned and kept there, just to decide what to keep and what to donate or throw out. It almost made her nervous, but she was excited, too. Everything was getting sorted out and she was getting her life back on the track it belonged on.

But there were just so many things to go through and Lucy really didn't know where to begin. That was really the only thing that was daunting, but she put that aside. Looking around at the place she'd called home for so long – the place that had barely changed in the years she'd been living there, Lucy tried to decide on just where to start. The bookcases next to her that were overflowing with tomes and journals seemed like a good place, just because the boxes filled with her books would undoubtedly be the easiest to fill but would also be the heaviest. The good thing though, was that neither of them would be having to carry them. The babies could do that and their backs would survive.

Lucy picked up one of the flattened boxes that had been sitting just inside her apartment since before they'd left for Crocus and turned to Bickslow. The man was practically asleep on his feet. Lucy had wanted to let him sleep for a while longer just because she really did know how much he liked his sleep-ins, and they had both needed their sleep, but it was Bickslow who had made of point of making sure they were up a reasonable time that morning. Even if he was on the verge of actually passing out on the floor, they had things to do and Lucy wasn't going to let him off that easy now. "Did you want to start with the books?" Lucy asked.

He was pulled out of his daze by her words. "Books?" he repeated. Bickslow honestly didn't even care where they started. All that mattered to him was that they got everything sorted out and packed up so everything was done. As soon as all of that was done, she would be free to officially move in. If she wanted to start with the books, then that was just fine. He nodded and combed his fingers through his still dishevelled hair that he had just been too lazy and tired to even think about sorting out. "Sounds good."

Except Bickslow really wasn't as useful as he'd hoped. He wasn't close to being a functional and awake human being yet, just because it was still early by his standards, and it was mid-morning by then. While Lucy neatly stacked her favourites – the ones that she wanted to keep regardless of knowing if Bickslow had his own copies sitting on his own bookshelves – and the ones that she sure as hell knew Bickslow _didn't_ own in the box, the Seith mage only stood in front of the other end of the shelf, slowly sipping away on his coffee that he was quickly running out of and reading the titles of the books in front of him.

There were so many he'd never heard of or seen in amongst some he'd read or at the very least seen in his own ginormous collection. Romance, mystery, science fiction, crime – she had books from every possible genre, and then some. But Bickslow honestly didn't care about any of those. He still wasn't a very big reader, though he had been slowly working his way through his collection ever since Lucy had got him interested in literature long before they'd broken up, and he was still doing so now that he was back. There was just one book in particular that caught his attention though – one that he hadn't seen in an incredibly long time.

He put the styrofoam cup down and carefully reached for the slightly dusty book that had been sitting on the edge. A hand swiped over the worn dark green cover with the golden swirls around the title and on the corners of the leather bound tome, and he smiled down at it warmly before gently opening the front cover to look down at the inscription on the first page in the writing that was his own.

 _ **I want you to get a happy ending like all the best stories have; I want you to get the happy ending you deserve.**_

 _ **I'll always love you, Lucy. Remember that.**_

 _ **Remember that I did all of this so you could have a chance at getting that happy ending.**_

Bickslow could remember writing those words and telling himself a million times over that all of it would all be for the best. He wouldn't have been able to give her what she wanted and deserved unless he let her go.

But none of that mattered anymore, because no matter what, Bickslow would make sure that _he_ gave her the happy ending that she deserved. He wasn't going to let himself die until he knew that Lucy had that happy ending. Hell, he'd probably get to a point of being so annoyingly _alive_ that Lucy would probably kill him with her own two hands, and that would probably _be_ her happy ending. As her future husband, Bickslow had already come to the conclusion that it was his job to annoy her to death (or to his own death, as it were).

He looked to Lucy beside him before looking back down to the novel in his hands to slowly flick through the yellowed pages. "I didn't think you'd still have this," he whispered.

Lucy had an eyebrow raised until she saw what was in his hands. She carefully stacked the books in her own hands in the box that was next to her, then gently pried the book from his hands. That one was most definitely going with her to Bickslow's. "Of course I would," Lucy answered. Flipping back to the first page, her fingers lightly ran over the paper that had only been stained by a countless number of tears from all the times she'd stared at it after leaving. "You gave it to me. Why wouldn't I have kept it?"

Bickslow shrugged. "I dunno. Because I guess you were supposed to be getting over me," he mumbled.

"Bicks, like hell I was ever going to be able to get over you. You should've known that."

"I know, but… But I shouldn't have given you reminders. That's just… Cruel."

Lucy sighed as she tucked the book into a space down the side of the box, then turned back to wrap her arms around Bickslow's waist from the side. "I like reminders though," she whispered. When he looked back down to her, Lucy only smiled, because sometimes a smile was all Bickslow needed to be reminded that everything was okay and he didn't need to worry. "Besides, you know this is one of my favourite books. Try and guess how many times I've read it since then though."

He grimaced. Surely it couldn't have been more than once. Hell, if it had been reversed, Bickslow probably would have left it sitting on a shelf and let it collect dust in his apartment. "Once? Twice?"

"Nope." Lucy grinned over her shoulder while pulling away and sauntering over to her dresser by her bed. "Try about forty or fifty times _at least_." That story was her way of comforting herself when she got homesick, and that had surprisingly been more often than she'd have liked. In the near year they'd been apart and she'd been in Crocus, Lucy had only ended up reading a few different books, because she would always come back to the one that was the most special to her.

"You're… I don't even think I can call you crazy anymore."

"No?"

Bickslow shook his head as he reached for his coffee again. "Nah. I think you're just you," he smirked. "You're just Cosplayer." Of course, that still meant she was crazy, but she was more than that. She was a million things at once, but all of that just made her exactly who she was.

She was just Lucy. Or… Cosplayer. But they were one in the same.

"Aw, Pixie. Thank you," she giggled. Then, as she opened up one of her drawers, she asked, "Now, do you promise not to judge me too harshly if I show you something?"

"That depends on what you show me."

She pulled out a grey shirt and closed the drawer with her hip, then tossed the shirt to Bickslow. He gave her a curious glance before he put his coffee down again to hold the shirt up in front of him, and his jaw almost dropped when he saw the faded pink Fairy Tail logo on the heather grey shirt. Bickslow hadn't seen that particular item of clothing in what felt like a century, even though it had only been a year. The problem, though, was that it looked a whole lot different to what it had the last time he'd seen it – the hems were fraying, there were tiny holes in the armpits, the fabric was probably see-through, and there were bleach stains at the bottom of it. "Jesus fucking Christ," Bickslow muttered. He brought the shirt to his face to rub his cheek on it and glared at Lucy for a moment. "What did she _do_ to you?!"

"I… I slept in it. A lot. I couldn't sleep without it…" Lucy murmured.

"Are you sure you didn't go to war in it?"

"Yes."

Bickslow almost felt offended. He'd never had any problems with Lucy stealing his shirt (or anything else that was his once she'd started staying over a lot and had ended up in any of her drawers in his apartment), and he'd honestly quite enjoyed knowing that it was her favourite thing to sleep in. But she had destroyed it in the year they'd been separated.

How? Bickslow had absolutely no idea, even though he found the fact that she hadn't been able to sleep without it incredibly endearing. But she'd destroyed his favourite shirt that he'd quite literally never worn in his entire life and had let her steal.

His poor, poor shirt. It was just a little disappointing to Bickslow, now knowing that she'd kept it all that time and it had made the trip to Crocus with her, that it wouldn't be making the trip to what would be _their_ apartment. The shirt was dead, because she'd killed it. Sighing, Bickslow held it up in front of him to inspect it once again and sorrowfully said, "I think you need to retire this shirt now though."

"What? No!" Lucy quickly pulled it from his hands and held it to her chest to hug it tightly. "Never!" She wasn't a hoarder in the slightest, but she was going to keep the shirt. Even if it stayed in the top of a closet and she only saw it when she was cleaning, she was keeping it.

"Lucy, it's old and ratty and falling apart. I'm a little offended that you destroyed a perfectly good shirt, but it's dead. You killed it."

"It still has _some_ life left in it."

Bickslow rolled his eyes. "I'll let you steal another one of my shirts," he suggested. Looking down to himself to see what shirt he'd actually put on that morning, he pinched at the fabric and added, "I'll even let you steal _this_ one if you want it."

"Nope. I'm keeping this one," Lucy insisted. She just couldn't bear to part with it, no matter how old and thin it was getting. And just to further her point, she quickly went over to the flattened boxes over by her door and hastily made one up. Grabbing a marker, she wrote on the side in big, bold letters: _CLOTHES THAT LUCY IS MOST DEFINITELY KEEPING._ She even underlined it all multiple times before folding up the shirt and placing it at the bottom. "But…" She looked back to Bickslow once she'd returned to her bookcase and nibbled on her bottom lip before flashing him with an innocent smile. "I think I'll steal the shirt you're in now, anyway."

* * *

Packing up Lucy's apartment went far quicker than either of them expected. Lucy's team had come to help for a few of the days, but that had just been their way of saying goodbye to the place they'd each spent a lot of their time in over the years. Natsu and Happy had even gone so far as whining over the fact that they wouldn't be able to sleep in Lucy's bed anymore, but since she wouldn't be needing the mattress, she'd ended up letting them take it. Most of the furniture she owned was actually staying in the apartment anyway, just because she wasn't needing it anymore, but even just getting a mattress seemed to cheer Happy and Natsu up.

It wasn't even like Lucy was leaving Magnolia. She was just moving houses, but the two were treating it like they'd never see her again. Bickslow found that just a little entertaining though.

Over the week, they'd managed to pack up and organise everything. Every shelf had been stripped, cupboard and drawer emptied, and every little thing that had made the studio apartment so distinctly hers had been put in one of the dozens of boxes that were now sitting in Bickslow's apartment just waiting to be unpacked and given a home.

When the last day came and there were just a few more things to be packed up, mostly just stray things like pillows or throw blankets and odd little knick-knacks, it was just Bickslow and Lucy in the apartment. Her landlady wouldn't be coming until five to get the keys and have Lucy sign the last of the paperwork, so all they had to do was wait.

With the last of the boxes stacked up by the door and waiting to be taken to what was Lucy's new home, Lucy silently and gently laid herself down on top of Bickslow on the salmon pink lounge, and made herself comfortable between the backrest and his side. She was tired, and she knew Bickslow was, too. They'd been staying there for the last week just so they wouldn't be making as many trips to and from his apartment, and Bickslow had never liked Lucy's mattress. Maybe it was just because he was used to his own, but whenever he'd ever stayed at Lucy's, he'd never slept all that well. So when Natsu and Happy had taken the mattress just that morning, he'd been happier than he should have been.

Still though. As much as Bickslow would have loved to just go home and crash on his own bed, there was still half an hour to go before Lucy's landlady would be there, so he would have to wait, and he would do so comfortably on the lounge. Well, somewhat comfortably. He was way too tall for that thing, but he was comfortable. That was mostly because of Lucy, though.

As they laid there in silence, neither needing to talk to make the situation any more comfortable, Bickslow's thoughts only drifted back to something that had happened so long ago that it felt almost like it had been a lifetime, just because so much had happened since that moment. Softly, with a small smile on his lips as he stared up at the ceiling, he asked, "Do you remember our third date?"

She lifted her head from where it was on his shoulder to rest her chin in her palm instead. "Our third date?" she whispered. "Gosh, that was so long ago. That was two years ago now."

"It was. But look where we are now."

They had come such a long way in those two years. Not just as a couple, but as their own people, too. Bickslow had gone from being the egotistical jackass with a bit of a soft side who didn't date and really didn't want to settle down or do anything, to wanting nothing more than their own baby to cherish and adore, while Lucy had gone from being the blushing virgin with a fierce kick whose first _kiss_ had been to that same moronic Seith mage, to... Well, she wasn't a blushing virgin anymore by a long shot, but she still had a fierce kick. They'd each grown into better versions of themselves, and it had all been because of each other. They'd brought the best out in each other and they wouldn't even feel like they were themselves unless they had each other. They were each a half, and they completed each other. That's the way things had always been, and that was the way that things would always be.

But even with that year apart from each other, they'd still grown. They'd learned how to cope without each other. That need for each other was still there, but they'd learned how to survive knowing that their best friend wasn't going to be there at the end of each day. They'd needed to do that to get through that year, and so coming back and getting back together, not everything was exactly as it had been before.

They'd each changed in that year, and even though they were back where they belonged – with each other – they weren't the same people anymore, and they each respected that. They respected that things had changed, but for the better. They'd grown and they'd each become their own, so even when they were together, that wasn't _all_ they were. At the end of the day, despite feeling whole again and feeling like nothing could get them down when they were with each other, they were still separate people. They weren't just one person – they were two that completed each other while remaining their own person.

And somehow, even though neither really liked admitting it, being apart had been good for them. So incredibly painful, but somehow, their relationship had grown, too.

In just two short years, everything had changed, but Lucy couldn't see her life having ended up any differently. "We've come a long way, Bicks," she whispered, and she matched Bickslow's smile with her own, just because she knew they were thinking the exact same thing. "And yet we still ended up lying on this lounge together."

"It seems quite fitting that my last time here ends exactly how my first time coming here did." It seemed almost complete that way to Bickslow. The first time he'd ever been to Lucy's apartment, just a little over two years earlier, only ended with them falling asleep together on that same lounge and in the exact same position they were in right then. He liked that though. He liked that a lot. And so did Lucy. "But," Bickslow added as she laid her head back down on his shoulder. "I think our third date was actually my favourite."

"Oh? It wasn't our second when we went to the museum?" she teased.

"No, but it is right up there in my top five," he chuckled, and Lucy could hear the sarcasm dripping in his voice. "But I really did like our third, because it was just so simple, and we'd only been dating for what, a few weeks? I just… I liked that it was so easy, you know?"

Lucy smiled before tilting her head to lightly kiss his cheek. "Maybe we should have strawberry cake and wine for dinner tonight then?"

"And this is why I love you: because you come up with the best ideas in the entire world."

"It's a talent, I swear," she giggled.

When there was a knock on the door a little later though, Lucy almost wished that she'd had a bit more time. She knew it was a silly thought, but as she got up from the lounge and slowly made her way over to it, she found herself just a little sad. That apartment had been her home every since she'd moved to Magnolia when she was still seventeen and it had been the place where so many of her dearest memories had been born.

She just almost felt as if she wasn't ready to let them all go and close the door to them, even though that wasn't what she was doing. But in a way, that's what it felt like to Lucy. She was leaving her apartment to go live with Bickslow, finally, and she was so excited to be doing that, but…

Her apartment had always been special to her, even though it was just a building.

And Bickslow had told her time and time again that she didn't have to move into his apartment if she didn't want to let go of her own; they could move into hers if she wanted to. She hadn't wanted to do that though. She wanted to be moving in with Bickslow and into his apartment. Aside from it being much larger than her own, she'd spent more time there that it had become more of a home than her own.

But officially letting go of her own was harder than she cared to admit, and as she looked down to the dotted line on the paperwork where her signature needed to be, she found herself hesitating. It shouldn't have been so hard, yet it was. For some reason, making it all official just made it feel like she was taking a really big step. She wasn't though, not really.

Not much was changing. The only difference was that her name would appear next to Bickslow's on his own paperwork. It wasn't a big deal in the slightest, even though it was a step.

But it was a step _forward_ , and it was a step she was _ready_ to take. And that was what was going through Lucy's head when she finally lowered to the pen to the page and quickly signed her name.

It was a step forward, and it was one of the last on what had been a very long staircase. But just because it had been long, it didn't mean she hadn't enjoyed it, because she'd enjoyed each and every single step she'd taken over the last two years.

She watched as Bickslow actually reluctantly handed the landlady his own key to Lucy's now old apartment, and it brought a smile to her face. He'd mostly hated her place, and he'd made that obvious on multiple occasions, but he'd still liked it deep down, just because there was so much of her there. But now, all of that would be in his – _their_ – apartment, and that was what Bickslow _loved_.

And now, all that was left was for Lucy to hand over her own key – the one that was slightly worn from all the years she'd had it and never once had it replaced. But that, she was finding she could do easily. She wasn't so nervous anymore, not that she really understood why she'd been so at all. She was excited. So quickly, she was picking up her set of keys and fumbling for the one she needed, and was pulling it from the hook and handing it to the landlady.

And so when it came to leave (after a hug from the older woman who was still wearing Lucy's old clothes – something that Bickslow found absolutely horrifying), Lucy was still smiling. Aside from being excited to get drunk with her fiancé and eat half a cake to herself, she was pretty glad to look behind her and see that wooden door with the odd scorch mark on it closed and locked up tight.

Because even when she was closing one door, it only meant she was opening another. All of her memories would still be there and she would always remember and cherish them, but she was excited about getting to make more, and she would get to do all of that with Bickslow.

* * *

 **A/Ns:** _Holy fucking shit, you guys... So many updates this week! This... This is why I fail my classes lol. Not really (kind of), but seriously... I really need to do some actual work. Thank god this is actually the last story I'd had a chapter already half-written for._

 _But anyway. Yeah, I need to stop with the whole baby thing... Maybe. Probably not. Eventually, maybe, but not this chapter. And the tiny little trip down memory lane... That happened, just because I didn't really know what else to have in this chapter. I'm not going to lie and say that I have everything in this story planned out, because I don't. I have a lot that still needs to happen in this chapter (you guys have NO idea what's coming...), but there's some parts that I just have no idea what to do. I don't want to have massive time skips, but I think that's just something that is going to be unavoidable in the next ones specifically. I'm thinking the next chapter (49) will be taking place closer to Christmas. Who knows, because really, I don't even know when I'm going to be able to get that chapter written._

 _Anyway though. Just another reminder that I WILL be slowing down with my updates now. Uni really is more important, but I'd had Shattered, HIMY, and this all with chapters half written, and I don't particularly like having chapters unfinished. So, I needed to get them done. I'm not saying sorry for all my updates this week though lol. Never._

 _With that, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Reviews are always appreciated._

 _Until next time._

 _\- April_


	49. Chapter 49

_So I recently realised that it has been a year since a started writing this (writing, not posting), which I thought was pretty neat because even if no one else is proud of how much my writing has improved, I am, and since it has also been a little while since I posted the last chapter, I thought it would be the perfect time to get a new chapter written._

 _So before we get to the actual chapter, I would just like to say thank you to everyone who has read up to this point. I love you guys, seriously.  
_

 _And of course, there'll be more notes at the end... Slightly more important ones, too._

* * *

It didn't take very long for Lucy to get all of her things moved in, surprisingly. Most of the stuff she'd wanted to keep had already been at Bickslow's, either from when they'd brought some of her things back from Crocus, or from where she'd just been gradually bringing some of her things over after they'd gotten back together.

And after that, once she'd finally given up her apartment and handed her keys back to the landlady, everything just seemed to fly by.

But it was in a good way, because they were both more than glad and ready to just be getting on with their lives, because really, it was about time they did.

At some point over the weeks that followed Lucy officially moving in, Bickslow had managed to stop bringing up the entire baby thing every five minutes. He still thought about it constantly, because he really could not get himself to stop, but he didn't talk about it, because it really just got him nowhere. He was still a little envious of Levy and Gajeel, too, and Lucy knew that, but he was also still glad in his own weird way that it wasn't them.

Still though, he'd come to accept that there was just no point in talking about it. He wanted a kid, but he also didn't want a kid (not right then, anyway), but regardless, he had to wait, because he had to wait for Lucy. So until Lucy was ready, which he assumed wouldn't be for another year and until after they were married, he just had to bide his time.

…And try not to have a complete mental breakdown, which he had joked about happening more than once over the last few weeks, but he'd been just a little serious, too. Death by baby fever had to be a thing. It just had to be.

But of course, in those weeks that had followed Lucy officially moving in and her best friend announcing that they were starting their family, Lucy of course spent a lot of time with said best friend. She was just a few months by the end of November, yet she'd already started buying a whole lot of baby things, and Lucy had most definitely been helping her. If anything, she'd spent more time out with Levy and buying _literally_ every single book on pregnancy and babies and all things related that they could find, than with Bickslow.

But that was fine. Bickslow could survive on his own. He most just took odd jobs with Freed and Evergreen since Laxus was mostly too busy with Jax and Mira was still running the bar. And, well, when it came to Jax, Bickslow still wasn't all that invested. The kid was cute as hell, sure, but he was still being a bit of a bitch because of the entire situation and he didn't really like letting that show. So he mostly avoided his godson.

But as the weeks went on, and they fell even further and further into their old routine that just felt so good to be back into, and as Bickslow quieted down on the whole them having a baby front, and as she spent more time with Levy and Gajeel and then with Jax, she started to realise something.

She started realising just how much she wanted a baby.

It wasn't really a case that she didn't want to have kids, because she did, and she'd told Bickslow that already. They'd already had that conversation. It was just that she'd wanted to wait, because getting back together had kind of made it all hurt again and she'd wanted to deal with that, and Bickslow had needed to as well.

And then it kind of just made sense for them to wait until after they were married and had maybe moved to a bigger place, because even with the spare bedroom in the apartment, it wasn't all that big, and she didn't really want to be having a kid while living there still, anyway.

But the more time that passed, the more she began to realise that she was just a little – only a little – envious of their friends, too.

Lucy was so happy for Levy and Gajeel. She really was. And she loved Jax too because he really was just so precious. But, as Bickslow had put it once, she found herself really wanting one.

Was she ready for one though: that was the question. Physically? Definitely. Emotionally? Well, she liked to think she was. It had been a long time since the last time, and it wasn't like she was the first woman to ever go through a miscarriage. It was still just one of those things that happened sometimes, and she'd accepted that. She worried about it happening again, too, but Bickslow had tried to get her stop thinking about that so much.

Still, Lucy hadn't been able to help but think about them actually having a baby, and she had reached the point where she was almost sure she was thinking about it more than Bickslow was.

Mostly, she was just thinking about how long it might take. The first time, it had taken upwards of six months, which sure, in the grand scheme of things hadn't been all that long. But it wasn't like they'd taken any kind of precaution to stop her from getting pregnant. Not a single one. And it wasn't like she hadn't been aware of that fact either, because she had, and she was sure that Bickslow hadn't been completely oblivious to it either – he was smarter than that. But they just hadn't really cared about what could happen, or at the very least, _she_ hadn't.

But how long would it take when they were _trying_? Would it take just as long as it had when they hadn't been planning on it, or would it take even longer?

And even then, at that point, they weren't going to be married for another nine months, so even if it took just as long as it had the first time she'd been pregnant, it would still be another two years before they actually had a baby that they could hold in their arms. Lucy knew it really wasn't that long, because they'd have the rest of their lives together and compared to that, two years was really nothing, but to her, it still felt like such a long time.

She didn't really want to have to wait that long, but on the other hand, she just didn't know what to do about that. Surely it really was too early for them to be having a baby considering all things, but the more she thought about it, the more she really did want to, and the less she cared about whether it was too early or not.

So when Bickslow was getting home that evening, tired from the mission he'd been out on all week and really just wanting a shower, all Lucy was thinking about was their future, and what it would entail and _when_. Bickslow didn't know just what she was thinking about though. He had no clue what she'd been thinking about for the last few weeks, though Lucy knew that she would have to talk to Bickslow about it at some point, and that point would have to be soon because there really were things she needed his opinion on.

"Cosplayer?" the Seith mage called out into the too quiet apartment. He was already pulling off his cloak as he made his way down the hall. "You here?"

"Bathroom," Lucy answered, and she smiled towards the door when he stepped through it from where she sat in her bath that was probably more bubbles than it was water. But it was warm, and it smelled like rose petals, and it was relaxing, and that was all that mattered. "How are you?"

"Tired," he sighed before leaning down over the edge of the tub to lightly press his lips to hers. "And sore."

"Did the job not go well?"

"No, it did…" It went really well. "It was just one of those ones, y'know? The ones that are so easy, they're just…"

"Long, exhausting, stressful, more time consuming and a hassle than anything?" Lucy finished for him.

He grinned – though it was tiredly – as he pulled his shirt off. "You know the ones."

"Mm-hmm." Oh, she really did know the ones. But it was just part of her job, so she dealt with them. She lifted her leg slightly to flex her foot, and watched the suds slide off before she dropped it back under the surface, then looked back up to Bickslow who was still pulling off the multitude of layers he wore for jobs, and suggested, "You should join me. Baths are nice to relax in, you know."

And he so would have joined her if it had been any other night, since he'd become quite fond of baths thanks to Lucy (or, really, fond of them when she was in them), but it wasn't any other night. "Raincheck. I really just want a shower right now." It didn't help that he was kind of gross right then from being out on a job all week and only having had one other shower in that time, so the thought of actually being in a bath with his lovely blonde really wasn't all that appealing. Not at all. So as he finally got out of his mission wear and stepped into the shower cubicle just next to the bath, he asked, "How was your week though?"

Lucy sighed as she heard the water pressure in the shower change as Bickslow adjusted the temperature. "Uneventful. I took a job with Natsu just after you left, but that was only for one day and it was only in Hargeon and it wasn't really all that difficult or anything," she answered. The babies had joined her in the bath by then, like they almost always did, and she was trying not to giggle with how much they were tickling her legs and her sides beneath the bubbles. "Then I just spent the rest of my time with Levy, and I started doing some of my Christmas shopping, too." She'd only gotten a few small things for some of the people in the guild, though. She'd gotten Erza's out of the way weeks earlier (a giant, seven-tier, strawberry and cream cake from her favourite bakery, to be delivered on Christmas Eve to her door), and Wendy's, too, but everyone else, she wasn't quite sure of what to get them just yet.

She had Bickslow's figured out, though. Well, one of them, though it had kind of been one he'd 'requested', so she wasn't all that sure if that one counted (but she'd told him no to that particular request at the time since it involved the same lacy red bra and panties she'd been in for one particular photoshoot, so surely it _did_ count since he thought she wasn't going to go through with it).

"But it's not even December."

"It will be in a few days."

"Alright then… But hey, that reminds me. I wanted to talk to you about something."

She opened her eyes again and stared at the wall with the shelves and towel rack on it that separated the shower cubicle from the end of the tub. "What about?" she asked.

"The evil ones—"

"Your sisters," Lucy said, smirking.

Bickslow rolled his eyes. "My _sisters_ ," he corrected himself, not that he was sure why since they really were the evil ones. "Were wondering if we wanted to stay with them for Christmas." They'd sent him a letter in the week he'd been gone and it had been waiting on the bench for him for when he got home, since Lucy wasn't going to open it, and in it, they had only asked if they were interested in spending Christmas with them in Crocus. Bickslow, of course, was actually really wanting to do it, because he'd come to have a new appreciation for family over the last few years specifically and his sisters were his family. He hated him just because they were his sisters, but he loved them too, and he really, really loved his niece and nephews.

He was almost sure that was why he wanted to go so much, because it meant he'd be able to see them again.

Still though, as much as he wanted to go, if Lucy didn't want to, they wouldn't. He'd be fine with staying home, too.

But the talk of the holidays only made Lucy remember what she'd been thinking about, and thinking about a lot over the last week and night alone, and she was worrying her bottom lip between her teeth as Pippi came up to nuzzle her cheek. Lucy knew she couldn't bring _that_ up just yet. Soon, though. Talking about their _Christmas_ plans came first.

"Um, maybe," she mumbled. It wasn't like she didn't want to, because she guessed that she did want to. It would be nice to spend some more time with Sara and Saskia and their families, because after all, that was the family she was marrying into, and now that they were a part of Bickslow's life once again, it made sense for her to get along with them – not that that was a problem in the slightest, because she already did.

It was just that it was the first holiday season back in Magnolia and with Bickslow, and she just assumed that they'd spend it in the guild and with their teams like everyone else usually did every year…

"We don't have to go if you don't want to," Bickslow said softly from within the shower, rinsing the shampoo from his hair. He could hear the hesitation, which was fine. They really didn't have to go. "We can stay here and we can go visit them in a few months or something."

"No, it's not that I don't want to," Lucy replied. "I just… don't know."

"Alright."

Lucy paused, and she stared long and hard at the wall in front of her. Was it wrong that she felt bad? Probably. But they were his family, and she had a feeling that he really did want to go because the three weeks they'd had there before just hadn't been enough. "You really want to go, don't you?"

"Yeah," Bickslow admitted with a sigh. "I really do."

"Then we'll go." It wouldn't be the worst thing if they did go, so where was the harm in it? It was just one Christmas, and maybe they could all visit Magnolia the year after or something.

He stuck his head around the wall after pushing the turquoise curtain back slightly, and he gave his fiancée his childlike grin that was just always so full of happiness and hope and constant excitement, and Lucy couldn't help but smile whenever she saw it. "Really?"

She nodded. "Yup. You can write them back and tell them to make room at their table for two more."

"Have I ever told you how much I love you?"

"A few times, yes," Lucy giggled.

He pulled the curtain closed again and went back to his shower with his stupid grin on his face. "Well, I haven't told you for a week," he said. "So I love you. Like, a lot. Like _a lot_ a lot." Like, to the end of the world and back a trillion billion times over. That was how much he loved her, and even then, that didn't really feel like it was enough.

"And I love you too, Pixie, but…" She was biting down on her lip again as she paused for another second before continuing, "There's something I wanted to talk to you about, too." There was no better time, right? That was what she told herself, at least.

"Okay?"

Lucy had to gather her courage to get her mouth to open again, and she really didn't know why, because she'd never really had that problem when talking to Bickslow before. "Well, you know how I've been spending a lot of time with Levy lately and… And helping her get things organised for her baby already," she began nervously. "And watching Jax in the guild for a few hours every now and then when Laxus and Mira are busy…"

"Uh-huh."

"Well, uh… I've been thinking a lot lately, too."

He was glancing up to the ceiling then and furrowing his brow, because it wasn't exactly like he could make that face at her. The ceiling was the next closest thing… Sort of. "Should I be worried?" he asked carefully.

"N-No! I… No."

"You don't sound too sure there, Cosplayer."

"Well, just be quiet and listen to the rest of it then."

"As you wish," he chuckled, and even though there was technically a wall between them, he could feel her glare through it.

She took a quiet yet steadying breath before she continued. "Well, I've been thinking a lot lately," she said again. "And… And I've been thinking a lot about us having a baby. And before you say that we've had this conversation before, because trust me, _I know_ , just… Just hear me out."

 _Well, that was what I'd been planning on saying, but okay…_ He remained silent and let her continue once more, only grabbing the conditioner bottle from the rack to squeeze some into his hand. It smelled like green apples, which had always been a bit of a guilty pleasure of his. He had a certain fondness for apple pies, too.

"So you know how when I was pregnant before, we didn't… We didn't plan it?"

"Uh-huh."

"And, um… You know how we weren't at all careful? Like, we never made a point of being safe so I _wouldn't_ get pregnant?"

"I do know," he answered. He'd always known. He'd just never really cared, to be perfectly honest. The entire children conversation had come up pretty early in their relationship anyway since it had awkwardly been brought up by Lucy when he'd been a kind of human kebab (and that was still something he wasn't allowed to make jokes about, apparently), so he'd just never really worried about a particular accident happening.

He'd been optimistic about it not happening, anyway. And so had Lucy.

Lucy nodded. She was wringing her hands together under the water and disturbing the bubbles near her chest then. "Well, uh, I've just been thinking about how it took kind of a long time for it to actually happen, you know?" She paused as soon as the words left her mouth, before she added quickly in afterthought, "Or, well, I guess it wasn't a long time at all since six months is pretty normal…"

"Lucy. There is a point to this conversation, right?" Bickslow asked suddenly. He felt like there was, but he also felt like Lucy was just having a hard time getting there.

She only let out an audible sigh. "I'm impatient."

"Huh?"

"Well, just a little," she clarified. "Because, I mean… I know I said I wanted to wait until after we were married to start, you know, trying, but that's still nearly a year away. And… And what if it takes us that long again? What if it takes even _longer_ for me to get pregnant this time? I don't want to wait that long to have our family."

"Is it really going to be that long though?"

"Two years."

"Two years?"

"If it takes as long as it did before, then… Two years before we'd actually have a baby," Lucy sighed.

Now, Bickslow was, in a way, fine with waiting. Because really, he knew that _he_ wasn't completely ready, and Lucy knew that, too, just like she wasn't ready – or at least she hadn't been the last time they'd talked about it. But two years felt like such a long time, even Bickslow could admit that. He didn't want to have to wait that long, either. "What exactly are you trying to say?" he asked softly. Except she didn't answer, and Bickslow grew worried. "Lucy?"

"What I'm trying to say is…" She trailed off when she tried to sink further into the bath, bringing her knees up to her chest and sliding down so much that the bubbles were almost tickling her nose. The poor baby in her hands would have been strangled to death if it were possible, that was how tightly she was holding it in her lap. But, as nervous as she was, because it felt like such a big thing, considering only a handful of weeks earlier she'd been feeling guilty about not being ready to have a baby yet, she knew it was also what she wanted to say. Lucy was sure of herself right then.

Well… Mostly sure of herself.

"What I'm trying to say is," she repeated, a little steadier than before. "If _you_ want to, because I know you said you weren't ready for a baby the last time we really talked about any of this, maybe in the new year, we can start, you know… trying."

Bickslow was quickly pushing the shower curtain back slightly and sticking his head back through it and around the corner. "What?" he asked, too shocked to do anything other than stare at her as he quickly pushed his hair back and away from his face.

Had she really just said that?

She had really just said that.

And Bickslow really was too shocked to do anything but stare at her, because he hadn't been expecting it in the slightest. He hadn't been expecting that they'd even have that conversation again for a while, either, but there they were, having that conversation.

"We don't _have_ to, not unless you really want to," she mumbled. "It's just that I don't really want to wait anymore, and I'm worried it will take a really long time this time…"

 _Huh_. Bickslow retreated back behind the wall into the shower and just stared at the tiled wall and the metal rack in front of him. He… really didn't know what to say. Like, at all. He knew what he _wanted_ to say, but whether that was the right thing or not, he didn't know.

He really had been convinced he'd have to wait all that time until they were even married to just start trying to get pregnant again. And, you know, he was okay with that. Sort of. It gave _him_ plenty of time to get ready, and it gave Lucy plenty of time, too, but he'd never really thought about just how long it would actually take. Two years really was a long time, which he now knew, and he didn't want to be waiting two years just to hold their baby, either.

But on the other side of things, there was the issue of whether or not they would be rushing things if they did start trying in the new year like Lucy wanted to. Then again, did it really matter if they were? They both knew what they wanted, and they had both known when they would want it – but that had obviously changed – so really, where was the harm in just doing it?

"So…" Despite being in the shower, he had to lick his lips to make them a little less dry before continuing, "You want to actually start trying to get pregnant?"

She nodded, even though he couldn't see her. "I do, but it's not something you have to decide on right now, either. You know, you can… You can think on it for a while because it's not really something you should decide on right away…"

Bickslow didn't need to think about it though. He knew what he wanted, and he knew what Lucy wanted, and that was important. Or at the very least, it was all that was important to him – the rest could come later.

"Lucy."

"Yes?"

"You have five seconds to get in here."

Lucy rolled her eyes. "No. I'm comfortable here." And to be perfectly honest, she didn't really want to face him right then, just in case she got disappointed.

"Four," he began counting down.

"Bicks, no," she giggled.

"Three."

And then the babies managed to pull the plug in the bath, and she heard the water begin to spiral down the drain and she felt it slowly begin to empty. "Babies, no!" But they just giggled at her before floating back up just to twirl around and rid themselves of the bubbles and excess water.

"Two."

"Okay, okay, I'm coming…" Standing up, she stepped out of the tub and carefully crossed over to the shower, and as soon as she had stepped in and slid the curtain back closed, Bickslow's arms were around her and she was trapped between him and one cold wall when his lips found hers.

"So you really want to?" he asked as he took a step back, just so Lucy's back wasn't against the tiles. Even if he'd tried to, he wouldn't have been able to keep the grin from his face, because, well… He was really excited all of a sudden.

Lucy shrugged and she avoided his gaze. "Yeah…"

"And what if it doesn't take a long time? You know, like, what if you're pregnant before we're married?"

"What? You think I wouldn't look good in my dress if I was knocked up?"

"The opposite, actually," he chuckled.

Lucy didn't really care all that much about the wedding though. She was excited about it, sure, but she was much more interested in starting their family right then. And even if it did happen in the eight months from the start of the year to the date she would _like_ to be married on, and she was actually pregnant then, she wouldn't care. "Well, even if I am, I won't mind," she said. "And the date can always be changed. We don't have to get married in August."

 _Well, she has a point._ But whether it took one or ten months that time, Bickslow didn't care. As long as it happened, they'd be fine, and then if it didn't, well… They'd figure something else out. Right then though, if it was one thing Bickslow was sure of, it was that he wanted to do it. He wanted to try. And even if it did take just one month, he'd be fine with that, because at the end of the day, they'd still have another nine months before they even had their baby, and that was more than enough time for Bickslow to be ready.

And, well… Say goodbye to sleep, too. He was going to have to do that.

Everything else they'd need to do to get ready for that though, could just come after.

"So you _really_ want to try to have a baby?" he asked once again.

"You asked me that like thirty seconds ago, Bickslow," Lucy answered, though the way Bickslow was smiling right then made it hard for her to glower, and her own smile was tugging at the corners of her lips. "My answer hasn't changed."

"Then let's do it."

"You… You want to?"

Bickslow nodded. "Yup. Why wouldn't I?"

Lucy shrugged. "I don't know…" she murmured. "I know that you said you weren't really ready to have a baby anyway, and, you know, that's fine. I just… I want to make sure that _you're_ sure you want to do this."

"I'm incredibly sure."

"So we're really going to do this?"

His face was nearly hurting with how much he was smiling, but he didn't care in the slightest. He was the happiest he'd felt in a while, and he was so incredibly excited for the next year, because hopefully, there'd be a lot of great things happening that year, and those, he couldn't wait for. And just seeing how excited Lucy was right then too, so hopeful and overjoyed – he knew that Lucy felt the exact same way as he did.

"We're really going to do this," he whispered, though he surprised himself a little when an easy chuckle slipped past his lips. They were really going to do it, and that was… _Wow_. "Looks like _baby fever_ really is contagious though, huh?"

And then it wasn't long before Lucy was giggling near uncontrollably, though slightly nervously, and Bickslow was laughing along with her while trying not to slip on the wet tiles as he picked her up and had her wind her legs around his waist, because really, where was the harm in getting a little bit of a head start?

* * *

The holidays had crept up faster than Bickslow had wanted them to. Before long, they only had a few more days left in Magnolia before they'd leave for Crocus for just another week to spend Christmas with Bickslow's family.

That wasn't the problem that Bickslow found himself facing though. No, he was incredibly excited about being able to go back to Crocus. The trip there was long, but whatever, it was still worth it, even if he would have to get up at 6 a.m. to get on a train.

Bickslow's problem that he was struggling to deal with one week before Christmas, was that he had absolutely no idea what to get Lucy. He'd managed to figure out what to get his team – and, unfortunately, her team too – and even his sisters and their kids (buying Layla, Damian, and Jasper presents might have been the best and easiest part of all of his Christmas shopping), but he didn't know what to do about Lucy.

Well, he'd gotten her a few things, but they were only small items. None of what he'd already bought her was enough though. He knew that he needed something more, because to him, nothing else felt like it was good enough, and considering it was the first of many, many Christmases they'd have together (the first one from the year they'd started dating the _first_ time didn't count anymore), he wanted to make it super awesome and super special.

Bickslow just didn't know how to.

And that was how he found himself wandering Magnolia one afternoon, trying to think of what would be the gift of all gifts for his fiancée. Since she was out on a job and wasn't due back for another two days, he had time to do that. He could wrap the other ones that he'd hidden in places she couldn't reach, too, but wrapping presents wasn't anywhere near as important as finding something else to give her.

It was just so goddamn difficult, and when he realised that he'd seemingly walked around the entire town and quite possibly been down every single street and passed every single store and shop of any kind, he sighed. He really was running out of time.

But he just kept walking anyway, his hands in his pockets and the babies following lazily behind him, because he was most definitely not going to find anything to get Lucy for Christmas in a street filled with nothing but houses and apartments.

Or maybe he was…

The topic of them moving had been brought up once or twice in the last few months, not so much recently, yet they'd come to the agreement that they would move after they were married, or maybe a little beforehand. But now that they'd be trying to get pregnant in the new year, several months earlier than they'd originally planned on doing so (which Bickslow was still very much excited for), Bickslow was suddenly realising that maybe, it would be best for them to move and find a bigger and better place _before_ they were married. You know, maybe it would be good for them to get things like that sorted out before everything became too chaotic…

He'd never really put much thought into them movie until right then, either, and he could admit that seeing all of the _'home open'_ , _'for sale'_ , and _'for rent'_ or _'auction'_ signs on the buildings on that particular street were partly to blame for him slowing his pace and actually looking at some of them and thinking about it seriously. The last time he'd even come down that particular street had been more than a year earlier, though then, it had been in a state much worse from the aftermath of Tartaros. Even now, some buildings were still being fixed up and repaired from all of the damage they had sustained – he knew this area had been one of the most badly damaged ones in Magnolia – so it almost did make sense that a lot of the houses on that street alone were back on the market. They were getting fixed up and it was time for them to have new tenants.

It wasn't a bad area, either. It was actually one of the nicer parts of Magnolia. And it wasn't as if there were things that made it really stand out as being nicer, because as large as Magnolia was, almost the entire town was built with the exact same style, and almost every building was an apartment building or a townhouse, not that that was a bad thing. It was just a nice part of the town, because it was near the heart of the town, and everything was just a short walk away.

As Bickslow walked, still slowly through the relatively quiet street – a lot of people had moved after the town had basically been destroyed – he could actually see himself living in that kind of area. He hadn't really been able to before, not when he'd first moved to Magnolia and when he'd been looking at apartments before he'd just ended up buying the one he'd lived in for years, but he could now, because they were nice houses and he had a nice life now, and it was a nice life that was only going to get nicer…

He stopped then outside one particular house – one with a _'home open'_ sign on the fence around the small yard that was so small Bickslow wasn't even sure it could be called a yard, since it was really just a few empty garden beds in the front of the townhouse that obscured what Bickslow assumed to be the windows of a basement. The house itself was nice enough, too, though the faces of some of the people who just walked out and passed him made Bickslow think the inside wasn't as nice as the outside. Which, sure, admittedly wasn't all that great if he had to be perfectly honest, though Bickslow could see that it was still going through some repairs from the scaffolding out the back that he could just make out over the steep roof.

Regardless of that and the faces of the couple who were walking towards the market district just at the end of the street, Bickslow found himself stepping forward and climbing the five steps of the stairs, and walking through the open doors.

He found himself in a hallway then. The first thing he noticed was how the wallpaper in there was torn and peeling, and just horrible. Honestly, it looked like it hadn't been changed in the last forty years.

On his left, there was a living room of sorts, he assumed, with a well-maintained fireplace against the wall, and on the other side of that room where it narrowed, he saw an old desk sitting in the middle above a dusty rug.

Ahead, there were stairs going down, and beyond that, a long hall which he figured would lead to bedrooms and bathrooms.

And on his right, he had the kitchen and dining, but as he stepped in there, he was stuck staring at where the kitchen should have been. It was missing. Well, most of it was. The island and some of the cabinets were intact, yet the back wall had most obviously been demolished and rebuilt quite recently, which Bickslow didn't find all that surprising considering the previous year's events. He could see a small yard at the back of the house through the glass door between the full-height cabinets on one wall and the windows on the perpendicular wall, and there was another door next to the cabinets which when he peeked inside, showed a small bathroom.

Before he could explore any more though, a voice had him turning around. "Oh! I didn't think anyone else would be coming in today," the man in front of Bickslow said. He was older than Bickslow – much older – and his dark brown hair was slicked back though the loose strands only made him look tired.

"Oh, sorry," Bickslow mumbled. "I was just a little curious. I can leave."

"No, it's fine," the man laughed nervously. "I can give you a tour of the place if you're interested?"

Bickslow considered it for a moment before nodding and extending his hand to the man. "Thanks, that would be great. And, I'm Bickslow." A tour seemed like a good idea. Sort of.

* * *

Bickslow was walking into the guild the next morning and instantly seeking out his team with a grimace. Thankfully, they were all sitting down in the same place, and so he was skipping the bar to get something for breakfast and instantly heading over to the table where his team sat.

"I did a stupid thing," he announced.

"What did you do?" Laxus asked, smirking.

Oh, Bickslow had done a very stupid thing. "I… bought a house," Bickslow answered. "Sort of." Well, he'd paid the deposit on it, and signed some kind of official document with the man that had owned the house – Hamilton, his name was – just that morning, so it was pretty much his…

But as crappy as the house had been, by the time Hamilton had shown him around and told him all about the upcoming renovations and repairs that were still scheduled to be done come January and February (there was a lot of work that still needed to be done to get it into shape), he'd been completely in love with it, which had surprised the original owner since so many people had walked away, having the image of what it currently looked like stuck in their heads. The floorboards in the master bedroom at the back of the house were having to be replaced, and the entire thing was supposed to be repainted (though Bickslow had told him not to bother with that, since painting he could take care of) and all of the wallpaper to be removed for good. The kitchen was getting completely rebuilt because of the damage from Tartaros, which had only wiped out most of the back end of the house, hence being rebuilt. The bathrooms were just gross and old, but those could easily be remodelled too, so Bickslow hadn't bothered with that, either.

But as much work as it needed, he'd still loved it. It was _perfect_ for what they needed. Not too big that it would be too hard to clean and maintain, though it wasn't too small where they'd be driving each other insane. The bedrooms were moderately sized – the master had its own bathroom and a walk in closet which Bickslow completely adored because they most definitely did not have enough room for all of their clothes in the apartment. The basement could be turned into absolutely anything since it was basically just one big room with windows at the front and the back so there was some natural light being let in, and the area off the side of the living room could easily be turned into a small study for Lucy. Or even just a place to put all of their books and curl up on a comfy chair with a blanket and waste the day away with a book.

He'd only seen the endless possibilities for what every room could become when he'd been there, unlike every other person who had seen it, and, well… He'd done the very stupid thing. Because he was stupid.

"You _sort of_ bought a house?" Evergreen repeated.

Bickslow nodded. "Yup."

"…Does Lucy know?" Freed asked slowly.

"Ah, no," the Seith mage answered, scratching the back of his head and wincing. That was the problem: Lucy had no idea. She wasn't even in Magnolia, yet she'd be coming to back to Bickslow suddenly owning one apartment, and being in the middle of owning a house too. That was most definitely not going to go down well, because buying a house was something they were supposed to talk about.

He wasn't supposed to see one and buy it within twenty-four hours (because really, even if he'd only paid the deposit, he could actually afford to buy it because he had savings from so many years of not paying rent or a mortgage on the apartment, but he hadn't been allowed to pay anything but a deposit right then). That was just crazy. And even then, he wasn't supposed to buy a house that still had a lot of work to be done to it, even when they wouldn't be the ones to do all of it because it wasn't even close to being ready to live in anyway.

...But it really had been so perfect, and if he hadn't been one _thousand_ percent sure of himself that Lucy would love it too – because he almost felt like he knew her better than he knew himself sometimes, and even when they hadn't talked about what they would want their home to have when they moved out of the apartment, he'd just known it was absolutely perfect for them – he wouldn't have bought it otherwise.

"Wait, so," Laxus chimed in again as he took a breath to regain himself – he'd been laughing too much at the situation. "You bought a house without telling your girlfriend?"

"Pretty much."

"Did you at least _talk_ about buying a house beforehand?" Freed questioned.

"Nope."

Evergreen was trying not to laugh as she kept Jax occupied in her lap. "So you, what, bought a house on a whim?"

"Something like that, yes," Bickslow sighed, and he leant forward to rest his chin in his palms. "What do you think the odds of me coming out of this alive are?" Because really, he was questioning just how much they would be in his favour.

At the very least, though, he could say it was a Christmas present.

Well, maybe.

* * *

 _So, yes... That happened. No regrets._

 _What I will admit is that I've been having trouble deciding where this is going. There's things I want to have happen, but I just can't have massive time skips. I can't do it. That being said, there will be some jumps in the next few chapters, because honestly, I'm sure you'd all kill me if I dragged this story out even more. There's still quite a bit to go (and a one-shot sequel that is more like a second part to an epilogue, but whatever), so don't worry about that._

 ** _Anyway. As far as the important notes go:_**

 _I posted a bit of an update on profile regarding some of my stories (this one and APS in particular). As those were my earliest ones, I am most definitely not happy with how they were written... There's so many mistakes in them that I feel sorry for anyone who did read them. Honestly, you guys are the real legends for getting through that shit lmao. But, anyway, I posted an update on my profile about how I'll be starting to go back and revise those early chapters and update them. It won't be done quickly, because between writing new chapters and going back to school again soon (let's see how far I can get before dropping out again...), I won't have all that much time. And, there are some differences between FFnet versions and the ones in my document that I work on. I don't think they'll matter much when I get to revising them because they'll really only be minor changes, but still... It's not going to be easy for me._

 _The first chapter of this has already been updated, in case anyone was wondering._

 ** _As far as other story updates go, in case anyone wanted to know about those:_**

 _ **Literature in History** is... giving me problems right now. I've come to see that I strayed a few times, and so it doesn't really tie in with **Sorority Parties Aren't All Bad** anymore, so, I'm either going to have to rewrite that or just find a way to make things work... Honestly, I'm leaning towards just going fuck it because I'm kinda lazy (whoops). LiH has become its own story anyway. _

_I have also written a story for Angst Week, Day 8 (Dearly Departed). That will be in **Chaotic Tales of Twisted Fairies** , and it's a CoLu. (Yay for CoLu!) _

_**How I Met You** will also hopefully be getting updated soon, though that chapter will be a little shorter (probably under 10k words) than the others. I've only really just started on that one again, so bear with me, please!_

 _Anyway. I think that covers everything. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and again, thank you to everyone who has read this, reviewed, favourited, and followed. If you'd been reading since I posted the first chapter, then I love you even more! Thank you for sticking with me all this time if you're one of those.  
_

 _And please let me know if you liked this chapter! I love seeing what you guys think. :')_

 _Until next time._

 _\- April_


	50. Chapter 50

_Sorry this chapter took so long. It was giving me a whole lot of trouble and for the most part, I just didn't want to work on it. But, I did, because it's been close to two months since I updated it so I figured it deserved a new chapter. It's shorter than I originally wanted it to be, but I'm also trying to wrap this story up (surprisingly), and at this point I think there's only about 10 or so chapters left. I'll have to plan out what I want in each chapter soon, though. Hopefully that will make writing the rest of this a whole lot easier..._

 _Anyway, this is mostly just fluff. Sort of. Kind of. Not really. It's also not proof read in the slightest. I'll get to it at some point. But long story short is that I'm not doing much in the way of writing more of Sara and Saskia and their kids. There's another chapter at some point with Layla and the twins, but that's really it... Sorry._

 _On another note, hurray for 50 chapters! (And to everyone who has been putting up with my shit for the last year, thank you guys so much. I love you. Really. Especially those who reviewed and followed and favourited and kept me motivated to write this and everything else I've done in this past year.)_

* * *

As soon as the door was opened, Layla was bounding down the stairs and running straight for her Uncle Bickslow. He didn't even get a chance to even step into her house before his niece was hugging his middle. "Uncle Bicks! Uncle Bicks!"

Saskia rolled her eyes as she helped Lucy bring in their bags for their week long stay, only finding it just a little difficult to move since Bickslow was still right in the doorway. "Layla, you could have at least waited until he was actually _inside_."

"Don't worry 'bout it. This is fine," Bickslow chuckled. Really, he didn't mind being attacked by Layla as soon as he'd even gotten there. It was kind of great. Passing his bag to Lucy so she could take them upstairs with his sister, Bickslow managed to pry himself from the girl's arms just long enough so he was able to duck down to quickly pick her up. He only frowned a little when he adjusted his grip before he asked, "Did you get bigger? I swear you got bigger."

Layla nodded quickly and the ponytail on the side of her head bounced with her. "Yup!" She'd grown an entire inch taller!

"You know, at this rate you're gonna be taller than your mother. But then again, _everyone_ is taller than your mother…" Well, apart from Lucy. Lucy wasn't taller than either of his sisters. But that was okay with Bickslow. He loved the fact that Lucy was short. As Layla only giggled, Bickslow closed the door behind them before he looked back to his niece with an infectious smile. "Now, how about we go find your Mama and Aunt Lucy?"

Layla nodded again and pointed to the stairs just ahead of them. "Aunt Lucy went upstairs with Mama."

"Well, upstairs it is then!"

They were staying at Saskia's house for the whole week they were there, not that they'd really had much say in the matter. As soon as Bickslow had told them they'd go up to Crocus to spend Christmas with them all, his sisters had already decided that they'd be staying at Saskia's and not a hotel, since Saskia had her spare room set up as a guest room. And really, Bickslow had just known better than to argue with his sisters.

The entire last week leading up to that morning where they'd left for Crocus, Bickslow had been far too excited. Between being able to spend Christmas with his family for the first time in nearly a decade (well, for him, anyway), and Lucy deciding she wanted to start working on their own family soon, Bickslow had plenty to be excited about. Lucy had already been told by Laxus to not give the Seith mage any more sugar, because even if Lucy found his constant good moods for the last couple of weeks enjoyable and adorable, the rest of the guild did not. There was a limit on how much Bickslow they could handle, and an incredibly happy and hyperactive Bickslow was just a little frightening.

But Bickslow was also excited about the house, too. He was still worried that Lucy would freak out and get really mad at him about it, but he was mostly optimistic. Bickslow just hadn't brought it up. Or even come close to bringing it up. Even if he was calling it a Christmas present, he'd never had any intentions of telling her about it or taking her there _before_ Christmas. He could show her the house when they got back before New Year's Eve.

"Uncle Bickslow?"

He glanced to Layla again as he rounded the bend in the stairs. "Uh-huh?"

"Did you bring me presents?" she asked, her dark eyes filling with hope.

Bickslow only grimaced. "I knew there was something I forgot about…" he mumbled, and he only waited until Layla's face completely fell and she was heartbroken before he was kissing the top of her head and hugging her a little tighter. "Ah, I'm just playin'," Bickslow laughed quietly. Was he being a terrible person? Probably. But he couldn't help himself. "Of course I got you presents." And Bickslow had had a lot of fun getting Christmas presents for his niece and nephews. If anything, Christmas shopping for those three had been the easiest of it all.

When they reached the room they were staying in, Bickslow lowered Layla back down to the ground and only rolled his eyes when she instantly went other to her mother and proceeded to tell on him. "Mama," she whined, hugging Saskia's waist. "Uncle Bicks is a meany."

"Bickslow, don't terrorise your niece," Lucy sighed as she folded up her jacket and placed it on the bed – she could find somewhere else to put it later.

"I wasn't _terrorising_ her, thank you very much."

Saskia shook her head as he looked down to her daughter. "What did Pixie do, huh?"

"Said he didn't get me any presents," the girl sniffled.

"But I did though!" Bickslow tried defending himself. Really, he'd gotten her lots of presents – well, a few. But he really couldn't let his sister believe that he didn't get his niece anything. He looked around the room for one of his bags before he spied it on the other side of the bed and quickly went over to it, just so he could pull out the few wrapped gifts he'd stowed in there. The larger ones they hadn't wanted to carry had been sent to the Spirit World temporarily. "See! I told you I got you presents. I was only kidding before, Layla. I promise."

Layla sniffled again. "Can I… Can I open one now?" she whispered.

"No, Layla," her mother broke in. "You have to wait until tomorrow morning to open your presents."

"But—"

"No buts. Now how about we go help Papa get lunch finished so Bicks and Lucy can start unpacking." And Layla didn't stay for long after that, only letting go of Saskia so she could run back out into the hall and down the stairs.

Saskia couldn't help roll her eyes as she gently took the presents from her brother's arms. Layla had always loved helping Xander – her father – in the kitchen and had always jumped at the chance to make a mess (and it was of course a mess Saskia always had to clean up, but she was used to it). "Lunch will be ready in about fifteen minutes," she sighed, balancing the presents in her arms as she turned for the hall before she pointed to the closed wardrobe behind Lucy. "You can hang your clothes up in there if you'd like, or put them in the dresser. Most of the drawers in here are empty, too, so you could use those. Oh, and, there _should_ be some towels in the bottom drawer of the dresser, but I'll bring you some more if there's not."

Lucy nodded. "Alright," she smiled. Unpacking didn't seem like such a bad idea. They were there for a little while so at least it would save them from having to get their things out of their bags all the time, and they'd already been told that they should just make themselves at home since they were family.

Bickslow was already picking up one of his bags and dropping it on the bed as he thanked the twin, and then Saskia was only smiling back before turning to carry the presents downstairs to the tree.

As soon as Saskia was gone, Lucy was sighing and collapsing face down on the bed though, right on top of the clothes she'd been taking out and organising to hang up or stow away in a drawer. She was just so exhausted. How long it took to get to Crocus was the only bad part about it, and it was the part Lucy hated the most. She had tried sleeping on the train that morning, as well as in the carriage that had taken them from the last station that was closest to Crocus and into the city, but she had failed. And all Lucy wanted to do right then was sleep.

Bickslow was chuckling as he unpacked his bag and stacked them up on the bed in front of him. "You can't sleep yet, Lucy."

"But I'm so tired," she mumbled. Lucy peeked an eye open to the pile of Bickslow's clothes that were right in front of her and she dragged the two sweaters from the top of the pile and folded them under her head. His clothes always smelled so nice. "Just let me nap. Just for a little while."

He yanked the clothes out from under her and laughed quietly again when she lazily tried to pull them back from him. He won, of course. "Nope. No napping," he insisted, and he was swiping the rest of his clothes away from her before she could use those as pillows too. "We'll just have an early night tonight, okay? Because you know we're going to have to be up early tomorrow, anyway. No sleep ins on Christmas morning here." He already knew Sara's family would be getting there early the next morning, and considering all of his sisters' children were still young, they all still believed in Santa, which meant they were all super excited to be able to open the presents that would magically appear under the tree on Christmas morning that were from the fat guy in the red suit (or so they thought, anyway). At the very least though, Layla knew that not all the presents came from Santa. That was good.

Bickslow really didn't mind the fact he'd probably be getting woken up at the crack of dawn by either his sister or his niece. Oh no. He was strangely looking forward to it. And if anything, he was considering it practice for when his own children were old enough to come running into his room shouting about how Santa had come.

"But… Can't I just sleep until lunch is ready?" Lucy moaned. "Please?"

Bickslow sighed and rolled his eyes reluctantly. "Fine." He even handed her another one of his jumpers to sleep on for some strange reason. "Just fifteen minutes though, okay?"

* * *

Bickslow stared up at the ceiling in the dark room, completely mortified. It was tempting to grab the pillow and cover his face with it so he could suffocate himself. At least he'd be put out of his misery then.

Next to him, Lucy was just trying really hard not to laugh. She was struggling, of course, but she wasn't laughing. Her cheeks did, however, hurt from smiling too much, but that was fine, even if she felt horrible for finding the situation amusing. She really shouldn't.

Lucy bit her lip to keep a giggle from slipping past her lips as she slid her hand back up her fiancé's stomach and up to his chest and over his shirt. "So, uh… Does that happen now?" she whispered. "Or… _not_ happen, I suppose…"

Bickslow grabbed the pillow from behind his head then and covered his face with it, and that was when Lucy couldn't keep herself quiet for even a second longer. It was like rubbing salt in the wound.

He shook his head into the pillow before Lucy was pulling it away. "Um, no. Definitely not," he mumbled. And the fact that Lucy had even found it necessary to ask him that was almost as horrible as the part where he was seemingly incapable of getting an erection right then. Really. It was horrible. And had most definitely not happened before – at least not with Lucy, anyway.

It just… wasn't happening.

But the fact that their room there was right next to his sister's room – the one she did, of course, share with her husband – was most definitely not helping. Because apparently, Bickslow and Lucy weren't the only ones who had thought Christmas Eve night was a great time to get lucky, which meant every _giggle_ or _creak_ of the bed from the next room had Bickslow flinching, grimacing, and wishing they'd stayed at a hotel with thicker walls.

There were some things that were just better left unheard.

At the giggle and the sigh Bickslow was sure he unfortunately heard, Bickslow was quickly swinging his legs out of bed and pulling himself up. He couldn't handle it, and as quiet as they were, they weren't quiet _enough_ , and Bickslow most definitely did not want to be there to hear either one of them climax. Oh no. He really would rather suffocate himself than hear that.

So Bickslow stormed as quietly as he possibly could out into the hall and past the bathroom and Layla's room and then down the stairs. He would go back and try to sleep when they were _done_.

Lucy had followed him down into the kitchen where he found himself warming up some milk on the stove for a hot chocolate, and she was giggling quietly again as she handed him the carton to heat more up – she wanted some too, thank you very much. "I'm really sorry," she giggled, wrapping her arms around the Seith mage's waist and forcing him to move his arm for her. "I shouldn't laugh."

"Damn right you shouldn't," Bickslow mumbled.

"I should probably just forget it even happened – or _didn't_ happ—"

" _Lucy_."

"Okay, okay," she snickered. Really, she was being a terrible person right then. She knew it. But she could really only be a terrible person with Bickslow anyway. Still, she should stop teasing him about it. She should just remove it from her memory and forget it happened at all. "I'll stop teasing you about it now." Lucy stood up on her tiptoes in the kitchen and quickly kissed his cheek. "Promise."

By the time Bickslow was done with the hot chocolate, Lucy had already made herself comfortable on the lounge in front of the Christmas tree. He handed her the one that was full of mini marshmallows first before setting his own down on the coffee table and going around to the tree and pulling a candy cane from one of the branches, then with his candy cane and hot chocolate in his hands, Bickslow was getting comfortable on the lounge next to his fiancée and letting her drape her legs over his lap. Because really, there was nothing better than sitting up in the middle of the night drinking hot chocolate and watching the lights flicker on the Christmas tree.

"I think…" Lucy began, sipping from her drink and staring at the tree as Bickslow stirred his own drink with the peppermint candy. "We should get a _really_ big Christmas tree when we're at home for Christmas next year."

"Yeah? How big?" he asked.

"Hmm. Maybe one that touches the ceiling," she mused. "Oh, but there'd have to be room at the top for the star."

"The star?"

Lucy nodded. "Yeah! You know, those toppers? I have this crystal one that we used to put on the tree every year when I was little," she smiled, sipping at the hot chocolate again. "Father would always let me sit on his shoulders so I could put it on the very top. I remember it fell one year because I couldn't reach properly, but then my mum caught it before it hit the ground so it didn't break. But then um… But then she died and I never got to put the star on the tree again because Father just…"

"I know," Bickslow said softly when Lucy trailed off. Her parents and her past were things he knew all about.

"But anyway," she continued, sipping from her drink again and getting a small bit of unmelted marshmallow that time. "I just want a super big tree. Maybe when we get a new place – you know, when we have kids – we can have a fireplace, too. Have the tree in the corner so it doesn't catch fire or anything, so then when it's cold we can sit up in front of the fire and drink hot chocolate like this."

Bickslow smiled as he tipped his head back into the top of the sofa cushions and closed his eyes. "Mm, that sounds lovely," he hummed.

"Are you picturing it?" Lucy whispered.

"Mm-hmm."

He was picturing it in the house that he hoped Lucy would really love too, of course. He was picturing the tree with the supposed crystal star tree topper on it right in the corner next to the windows at the front of the room, the fire lit just next to it, and Lucy tucked into the corner of a lounge with her hot chocolate and a book. It was a good thing the ceilings in the house were a little higher than normal because it meant Lucy would be able to have her super tall tree that touched the ceiling.

But still, that was only assuming Lucy liked the house and wanted to fix it up with him so they could make it better than it already was.

Sipping on her hot chocolate again, Lucy smiled into the mug as she heard the quiet, tiny little footsteps in the hall and felt someone lurking. "Bicks?" she murmured. "I think someone is out of bed."

"Yeah?" Bickslow didn't even glance over his shoulder to where he knew his niece was peeking around the wall as he added, "It's a good thing Santa has already been then, otherwise the little one who _should_ be asleep would be in trouble."

Layla gasped quietly and finally stepped into the room. "Santa came?!"

 _Kids are so adorable._ "Uh-huh. Come and see." Of course, it was really wasn't Santa, since Saskia and Xander had brought out the rest of the presents once Layla had gone to bed earlier. There'd only been a few under it before – some of the ones from himself and Lucy that were for everyone, as well as a few from Saskia and Xander for the twins or even Bickslow and Lucy themselves – but now, there were so many more! Saskia and Xander had even taken care of the milk and cookies that their daughter had left out, and, well… Bickslow had helped, of course. He really loved cookies.

So when Layla then quietly ran into the room and proceeded to sit on the floor next to the pile of presents under the tree and go through them, trying to see if her presents were all bigger than the ones for her cousins (because Santa knew to leave some of her cousins' presents at their house or some of Layla's at Aunty Sara's house, depending on the year), Bickslow could only watch in silent amusement and continue stirring his drink with the candy cane.

"You know you shouldn't be awake, Layla," Lucy said softly.

"I know, but I just really wanted to see Santa!" the girl said. She stopped shaking one of the smaller ones by her ear to look back to Bickslow. "Did you see him, Uncle Bicks?"

"Just missed him, I think."

"Oh…"

He got up from the lounge after Lucy tucked her legs back in against her chest and he knelt down in front of his niece. "But he most definitely came," Bickslow began softly, gently prying the gift from her hand to set it back on the pile. "None of these presents would be here otherwise. Santa's just real busy tonight. I'm sure he would've stayed and waited for you so you could meet him if he could have, but he's just go so many other houses to visit tonight, and he has to make sure he gets to all of the other good little boys and girls. And sometimes, Layla, that just means he can't stay for a little while longer to meet kids like you because he doesn't want any other children to wake up disappointed because he couldn't get to them on time."

"But…" Layla sank down onto the floor and crossed her legs under her. "Santa's magic," she pointed out.

"Every magic has its limit, though."

And then Layla just pouted, because she'd really just wanted to meet Santa, before she nodded once and said just, "Okay." As disappointed as she was, because really, she still wanted Santa all to herself so she got _all_ the presents, she didn't want her friends – or god forbid even her cousins – to be disappointed on Christmas morning because Santa had been running late, especially because of her.

She could sort of deal with not catching Santa that year if other kids got all of their presents, too. And besides, there was always next year. Maybe she would just sneak out of bed a little earlier then.

"Good. Now, how about you get back to bed before your parents find out you're up in the first place, huh?" And of course, Bickslow didn't actually give his niece a chance to respond before he was standing up and picking her up at the same time. "No, really," he continued, already stepping over another present and heading towards the stairs with a giggling six-year-old. "If your parents find out that you got up and that I didn't tell you to go straight back to bed, _I'll_ be in trouble. You don't want me to get in trouble, do you?"

"Um…"

"Hey now…" Bickslow mumbled, and shook his head as Layla began to giggle into her hand. "You are an evil child."

"That's what Mama says sometimes."

"Oh, I don't doubt that. But do you wanna know a secret?"

Layla nodded as she climbed back into bed.

Bickslow waited until Layla was all tucked in again before he leaning back down to whisper, "It's an Alderwood thing. We're all kind of evil, and yourmother _especially_ is." And it was a trait that Bickslow was sure that Layla had gotten from her grandfather, one that he had of course passed on to all three of his children. "But anyway. You, little miss Layla, need to go to bed now."

She yawned and nodded, even when she knew she was too excited about being able to open her presents in the morning to get any sleep anyway. But she'd try, just because she didn't want to get in trouble for being out of bed. "Goodnight, Uncle Bicksy."

"Goodnight, Layla," Bickslow said softly. "Merry Christmas."

And then Bickslow pulling the door closed gently behind himself and quietly ducking down the stairs again, only to find Lucy still curled up on the lounge with her hot chocolate and with a smile she had no intentions of losing any time soon.

But it really was impossible _not_ to smile. She loved watching Bickslow with his niece and nephews – especially with Layla – because he was just so wonderful with them. She couldn't wait to see Bickslow with their own children (well, she really _could_ wait, just because she most definitely did not want a kid at that _exact_ moment), just because Lucy knew she'd love seeing him with them. She was just a little convinced that Bickslow was so good with his niece and nephews just because he was still a bit of a kid at heart, but that was some Lucy loved way too much.

"You know," she began with a whisper as she laid her legs back out across his lap once he sat back down. "I think I chose the right guy."

He raised an eyebrow at the blonde next to him. "Are you only just realising this?" Bickslow chuckled.

"No…" No, Lucy had realised how perfect Bickslow was around that time two years earlier. "I just felt like saying it," she shrugged.

"Uh-huh. And, uh, why is that?"

Lucy shrugged again before sipping on her drink again. "No reason in particular," she giggled. Bickslow didn't exactly need to know that she'd just been daydreaming a little about what he'd be like with _their_ kids.

" _Right_ …" he mumbled. "But anyway, since I believe it's technically now Christmas, being after midnight and all…" Bickslow picked up the small wrapped box he'd collected from under the tree before sitting back down and handed it to Lucy. "Open this one now."

She passed her mug to the Seith mage to take the small box in her hands. "Why do you want me to open one of my presents now?"

" _No reason in particular_ ," he said, only to get gently shoved by Lucy for using her own words. "Okay, but really, there's no reason. You don't have to open it now if you _really_ don't want to. But I just thought since we're both up you'd want to…"

"Well, I suppose that's fair enough."

So Lucy looked back down to the box in her hands. It was small, fitting easily in the palm of her hand, so she knew it was jewellery of some sort (and even if it hadn't been so small, she probably would've assumed it was jewellery anyway because Bickslow had yet to fail to give her some piece of jewellery for any event or holiday), which meant when she did pull off the wrapping paper, she wasn't the least bit surprised to find a black ring box under it. In it though, was just a simple ring with a small pear shaped amethyst set in the centre of the thin silver band.

"Bicks, it's so pretty. I love it so much," she whispered, quickly leaning forward to wrap an arm around his shoulders and softly press her lips to his. "But you _really_ need to stop buying me jewellery, you know."

"I know… I just… I'm horrible at buying presents. And I didn't even mean to buy you that. I was looking for something else and then I just couldn't help myself 'cause I thought it was really nice, and I just had to get you that too."

She slipped the ring onto her right hand and smiled to herself when she found it fit perfectly; she was sure Bickslow had some kind of talent or something for it. "Well, thank you, because it really is lovely. But still, you spend way too much money on me."

"I won't deny it." But if she thought him buying her jewellery was too much, he was beginning to worry a whole lot more about how she'd react to the biggest of her Christmas presents for that year.

* * *

When Bickslow was woken up first thing the next morning by having a pillow thrown at his head, he wasn't quite sure whether he should be annoyed or telling himself that he should get used to it. Or maybe it was both.

He was just not a morning person in the slightest, and even if he probably should get used to it at some point since he was sure his own kids would be up at the crack of dawn on Christmas morning once they were old enough to be running in to wake him up, Bickslow really wasn't all that fond of being woken up at all. He was warm, and it had been closer to two by the time they'd gone back to bed, so all he wanted to do was sleep.

His nephews and nieces apparently thought otherwise.

And when he had yet another pillow thrown at him, followed by some childlike giggling, he only groaned and pulled the sheets up over his head. "Quit attacking me, you monsters," he mumbled. And where was Lucy to defend him, huh? The other side of the bed was unusually empty. It wouldn't surprise him if Lucy had told his _niblings_ to go and wake him up.

"But you gotta get up," one of his nephews whined – Jasper, Bickslow assumed, since Jasper was the more talkative of the two.

"Soon."

"Mummy said," Damian insisted.

He felt a weight on the edge of the bed behind him and then two small hands shoving his shoulder. "Mama and Papa said no presents till everyone awake," Layla explained. Why her uncle needed to be awake so she could open her presents along with her cousins, she had no idea. But the silly adults had insisted that everyone had to be awake before anyone could open any of their presents, and everyone but Bickslow was awake and that just wasn't good enough. "Please, Uncle Bicks," she pleaded, shoving him again. "We wanna open presents."

Bickslow sighed into the pillow. How could he say no to that? It was probably a good thing he'd been hiding under the covers, because Bickslow was sure he would've caved had he seen the looks they were no doubt giving him. Four and six-year-olds were masters of the puppy face. That much he'd already learned.

"Fine, fine," he sighed, pushing the covers back down. "I'm getting up." Although why he needed to get up so they could open their presents, he had no idea. But he couldn't resist his precious _niblings_.

And to a chorus of excited cheers (because yay! Uncle Bickslow was awake and it was present time!), he pulled himself out of bed and followed the horrible, horrible children down the stairs and into the living room where everyone was apparently waiting for him.

"Look who decided to join the land of the living," Sara quipped from the edge of the lounge.

" _Ha-ha._ Very funny," Bickslow mumbled in reply. A peek at the clock sitting on one of the end tables only had him sighing as he went to sit down next to Lucy on the floor. _Six freaking o'clock. Who the hell is up and about at six in the morning?!_ Bickslow only wondered what time the twins had woken Sara and Rory up for them to already be there, all dressed in their cringe-worthy matching Christmas sweaters. God, he hadn't missed those in the slightest. "Nice jumpers."

The husbands – his brothers-in-law, Bickslow supposed – merely shook their heads as their respective wives looked a little too gleeful for the time of morning. Saskia was especially happy, but it was really just because she was looking forward to seeing Bickslow's face when he opened the first of his presents. Saskia was proud of how the most recent sweaters she'd knitted had turned out. She hadn't taken it up until after she'd gotten married, surprisingly, and then when she'd had Layla, she had just wanted to bring back their old tradition of having matching Christmas sweaters, and she'd learned how to knit jumpers.

And now _everyone_ had an ugly Christmas sweater.

"Why thank you, Pixie." Then, when she saw how restless the children were – Layla was unable to sit still at all, while the twins were mostly too busy hitting each other – Saskia rolled her eyes and sighed, "Okay, fine. You can open your presents now."

And before long, the living room floor was covered in torn wrapping paper and all of the presents were opened. Xander had gone to get breakfast started at some point, and it wasn't long before Rory had gone to help. Sara was getting told off by Damian and Jasper for helping them open one of their boxes so they could already get started building a tower of some description, and as Layla was too busy playing with her new dollhouse (courtesy of Bickslow. It even came with its own set of miniature totems because she'd supposedly complained that her cousins got some but she didn't), Saskia was wondering just where to begin with cleaning up the mess. Even Bickslow was already flicking through one of his own presents, a cookbook – _Man Meets Stove_ – that Lucy hadn't been able to stop herself from buying.

But Lucy just sat there, mostly just watching and trying to ignore how itchy the green sweater with the white tree and a red 'A' in the centre of it actually was, because she didn't really know what she was to do with herself. It had been far too long since she'd had a proper family Christmas that she'd forgotten what it was really like. It wasn't the same as it was with the guild or her team – or even just Bickslow – and it wasn't like how it had been when she'd been younger and her mother had still been alive. It was better.

With Bickslow and his family, the one that she was already an honorary member of, it was better. It was nicer. And the sense of happiness and joy she got from being a part of that only had Lucy telling herself that she could really get used to all of it, because between the guild and the wonderful people in front of her, she really didn't think she needed anything else in the world to be happy.


	51. Chapter 51

_Important notes at the end that I would, of course, very much appreciate you all read!_

* * *

One of the last things that Lucy expected to be doing on their trip to Crocus for Christmas was getting dragged to a bridal boutique under the pretence of having a girls' day out. Bickslow had already been dragged out for the day by his brothers-in-law and nephews earlier that morning, so that meant Sara and Saskia (and Layla, of course) had been free to do something with Lucy.

She hadn't had a clue just what their day had entailed when they'd left Saskia's house in the middle of the morning, though as soon as she'd found out just what they'd been planning, Lucy was sure she should have actually expected it just because they were Alderwoods and getting into mischief was what they were best at.

Lucy could only roll her eyes at the twins as they pushed her to sit on one of the white leather lounges in the small store. "Guys, I thought you said we were going out for lunch. This doesn't look like a restaurant," she said.

"We _are_ going out for lunch," Sara answered.

"Just later," Saskia added with her smirk matching her sister's beside her. "There's no point in trying on dresses _after_ lunch."

"There's no point in trying on dresses at all," Lucy insisted. She'd figured that was why they'd dragged her to a dress shop, but she had still hoped it was something else. For all she'd known, they could've been there so she could get an idea for her bridesmaid dresses – hell, she would've been okay with that. But trying on wedding dresses? That was not something she was completely okay with. It wasn't even something she'd thought about, to be perfectly honest.

"Sure there is! You don't want a dress straight from the rack, do you?"

"I had one," Sara chimed in. "But that was only because my engagement lasted all of two months so I didn't have much choice. I would've got one properly fitted and made for me if I'd had the time, though."

"But I have plenty of time to do that," Lucy pointed out. "At this point, the wedding is still eight months away. I can find a dress I like in a couple of months." There just wasn't any rush for her to do anything. It was still so far away.

But on the other hand… They were still planning to start trying to get pregnant once they were back in Magnolia, and on the off chance it happened quickly, they'd already agreed to change the date of the wedding accordingly, should they actually need to. Getting married wasn't quite as important as having a baby to them; they could get married whenever they wanted to.

But still, on the off chance their attempts at having a baby didn't take an eternity like she half expected it to do, and their August wedding plans didn't work anymore and they had to maybe move it forward, maybe, just maybe, trying on a few dresses wouldn't be the worst idea. She was really just counting on how the wedding was still set to be at the end of August for how little she'd actually started planning it. And undoubtedly, she wanted to completely love her dress and have it feel like it fit her perfectly. She didn't really want her dress to be one she'd had to quickly find and then worry about getting it tailored in time all because they'd decided to bring the wedding up. She just wanted to have it all organised and sorted out beforehand so she had nothing to stress about, baby or no baby and August wedding or not.

It was too soon to be deciding on a dress regardless, and Lucy especially didn't want to be buying one in Crocus. But at the very least, perhaps she could get an idea of what she wanted, because she really had no clue where to even begin when it came to anything to do with her wedding.

"But you still don't want to be leaving it all until the last minute…" Saskia said.

Lucy shrugged. "I suppose not." Maybe she could have some fun while she was there. She always liked going shopping for new clothes and being able to try them on, and trying on wedding dresses seemed like it could be pretty exciting. And really, Lucy doubted she'd be able to get out of what her future sisters-in-law had supposedly planned for her anyway, so she figured she might as well embrace it. Sighing then, she pushed herself up to stand and looked around the store. "We should probably go find the manager or something then, right? Since I'm guessing you already made me an appointment if we're here…"

The twins were almost jumping up and down with how excited they were – they apparently liked getting their way. "That sounds like a brilliant idea!" Sara beamed. She had to admit she'd been wondering where the manager had been hiding all that time, though, since they'd had that appointment since they'd known Lucy and Bickslow would be there for Christmas, so the store had known they'd be there. So as she went to go peek around a wall for the store owner, Sara couldn't help but giggle and tell Lucy just when it was they'd planned to take her to the boutique.

Lucy could only roll her eyes.

She ended up having a lot more fun than she expected to, though. Most of that fun came from watching Layla hide under the skirts on the few mannequins or even trying on a few herself even when they were really just a mountain of fabric on her. But Lucy had fun trying on the dresses. Knowing that she wasn't actually there to decide on one meant she could actually enjoy how horrible some of the dresses actually were on her. Most of them just made her feel like a misshapen marshmallow.

"You know, though," Saskia began as she took a sip of her orange juice in the champagne flute before setting it down. "I'm sure if you'd started planning your wedding, you'd at least be able to decide on what kind of dress would be best."

Lucy sighed. _Again with the planning…_ They hadn't been able to go five minutes without bringing it up that day so far. "Well at this point it's still set to be in August so…"

"So an Autumn wedding then."

"Looks like it…"

"Oh no," Sara whispered. "You don't sound so sure. You're not having second thoughts, are you?"

"Oh, god no!" Lucy quickly assured her, just to get a sigh of relief from the twins before she turned back around to face the mirror on the pedestal. The dress she had on then was actually one she really loved, even if it really didn't fit her all that well at all. It was fitted all the way down to the middle of her thighs with the lace three-quarter sleeves leaving her shoulders exposed, and with a simple sweetheart neckline. It was a style she would love to be married in, but…

She wasn't all that sure it would work, being so fitted. Getting pregnant would surely just make things difficult. Though really, things were already difficult enough, as she was quickly realising, since the entire baby thing was more important than getting married. She'd said that the dress could wait, but now Lucy could only start worrying about it a little, because she really did want a dress that fit her perfectly, and if they had to change the date of their wedding because she did miraculously get pregnant, what if her dress wasn't ready? She didn't like resorting to Plan B's, which would be having a back-up dress of some description.

She liked having one perfect plan and sticking to it.

She wanted one perfect dress.

But now Lucy was really just a little confused, because she didn't quite know what to do about the entire situation. She really didn't want to wait until it was closer to the wedding until they tried to have a baby, because she was still so worried that it would take a painfully long time for it to happen and she was far too impatient for that. But if she got pregnant, she had absolutely no idea when she'd get married at all. The fact that they didn't have a date set in stone yet was most definitely not because she was getting cold feet.

Still… Lucy didn't know if she could tell the twins that. They weren't telling anyone about the baby situation because they didn't think it was something that anyone else needed to know about. But the twins… They were family. And Lucy was sure Sara and Saskia would be just as excited as she was if they knew what was going on.

Lucy turned back around to face the twins on the lounge (Layla was still playing hide-and-seek with some of the dresses, apparently) and had to try and keep her excitement contained as she asked them, "Can you keep a secret?"

"Oh, definitely!" Sara answered.

"Of course," Saskia replied, patting the space on the lounge that they'd just made. "Now come, tell us this secret of yours!"

Lucy was bending to pick up the skirt of her dress just to hop down from the pedestal, and then was rushing – well, to the best of her ability considering she was in a wedding dress – over to the lounge and sitting herself down between the Alderwood twins. "Okay, but… You have to promise not to tell Bickslow any of this," she said first.

"It's not something bad, is it?"

Sara sighed in agreement with her sister. "I don't think I want to know if it's something bad…"

"I promise it's not bad," Lucy assured them. _Well, I hope it isn't._ She couldn't see how telling them just why they didn't have their wedding date completely set was a bad thing. "It's just not something Bicks and I are talking about much – not with other people, at least – and I don't really think he wants you knowing…"

Saskia flashed the famous Alderwood grin. "But you're going to tell us anyway because we're your sisters now and you love us."

"Um, yeah…" Lucy giggled. "Something like that." She was really just ridiculously excited about it all. But… The fact she did love her sisters-in-law was part of it.

" _So_ …" Sara prompted.

"So…" Lucy began. "Bickslow and I… We haven't actually officially set a date for our wedding yet."

"Oh? But I thought you two were planning for August?"

Nodding as she set her juice down again, Saskia said, "Didn't you say a while ago that it was an anniversary for you in August?"

"Three years from our first date, yes," Lucy responded. She was almost a little surprised that Saskia had even remembered what they'd said the first time they'd visited. "And we're still aiming for August, but if it ends up being before then, or even after then, then we won't be worried."

"So… You're thinking of moving your wedding up?" Sara asked.

Lucy shrugged. "Maybe."

"But," Saskia added, "You're also thinking of pushing it back?"

Lucy shrugged again. "Maybe."

The twins only stared at each other across the blonde like they were suddenly communicating telepathically (which Bickslow insisted they could actually do, and had multiple times that week alone), before they both turned their attention back to Lucy with matching looks of utter confusion. "Alright. Please explain," Saskia said.

"Because we really don't understand what's going on with your entire wedding date situation," Sara finished. It really just didn't make sense. Neither of them could see why Lucy and Bickslow wouldn't set an actual date. If Sara didn't know them both, she probably would've just assumed a disastrous end to their relationship was quickly approaching. But she did know both of them, and she knew that an end was nowhere in sight. But still, for the life of her, Sara couldn't figure out just why her brother and her future sister-in-law were being so indecisive when it came to setting an actual date. And she knew Saskia was just as confused.

But of course, Lucy was just about jumping out of her seat she was so excited. "Well, you see…" She had to stop herself from making vague hand gestures as she happily continued, "We haven't officially picked a date or anything because we're going to start trying for a baby when we get back to Magnolia…"

The squealing that ensued even had the store owner popping her head around a corner to see if anything was wrong (she worried about her prized dresses!), but when she realised she had no hope in hell of finding out just what the women were saying, she was just shaking her head and ducking into her workshop attached to the store again.

"A baby?!" Saskia shrieked. "Really?"

"Uh-huh…" Lucy could only giggle when she found herself squished between the two women – well, until she was being squeezed so tight she couldn't breathe. "Um… Ladies… I, uh… can't breathe."

"Oh, gosh, sorry!" Sara giggled. "We need you to breathe so you can give us adorable niblings!"

Lucy rolled her eyes. "That is not a real word!"

"It is in this family."

"You're all insane. The lot of you."

"Oh, but honey, you're marrying into this insanity, remember?" Sara pointed out.

"I suppose I am," Lucy giggled again. Really, it wasn't like she could forget, but it wasn't like she _wanted_ to forget either. She was more than glad to be marrying into the insanity that was the Alderwood clan, even if she was still just a little amazed that their insanity seemed to know no bounds.

"But anyway." Saskia on Lucy's other side patted her knee to get her attention again. "You and Pixie are going to have a baby?"

Lucy nodded. "That's the plan."

"So that's why you haven't got a date set. Because you're waiting to see when you get pregnant?"

"Pretty much." Lucy looked down to her lap and lifted her shoulder in half a shrug before continuing, "Though I'm sure it will still end up being in August anyway."

"Why do you say that?" Sara asked.

"Well, it's not like it'll happen right away…" she mumbled. Lucy looked back to Layla to make sure she was still preoccupied before she quietly added, "And we've _never_ been all that careful or anything, even before we broke up, so I doubt we'll be lucky anytime soon…"

"Honey, don't worry about it," Saskia said gently. "These kinds of things happen when you least expect them to."

Sara nodded. "It's true, you know."

"I know it is," Lucy sighed. "It's just…"

Two things were occurring to Lucy right then as she trailed off and began nibbling on her bottom lip. One was that a bridal boutique was probably not the best place to be having that kind of conversation. And two was that she was suddenly thinking about bringing up the baby she'd lost before.

She didn't talk about that, though, so Lucy thought it was just a little strange that she was actually _wanting_ to. It wasn't like she was still completely miserable about it happening, because she wasn't – and neither was Bickslow, which was a really good thing. He was still a little sad about it, she guessed, but that wasn't the end of the world. Still though, the entire thing wasn't something Lucy had ever really found herself wanting to talk to anyone about, even if she was reasonably okay with all and even when there had always been a few other people who'd known about it.

Sara and Saskia though… They were her family, which was why she was even telling them about planning to have a baby in the first place. And it wasn't like Lucy wanted to _really_ have an entire conversation about miscarrying, because she didn't. She could at least mention it though, because it was relevant. It was part of why she was so worried she wouldn't actually be able to give Bickslow what he wanted most in the world at that point.

And it really wasn't like Lucy could completely forget that it had ever happened at all. Aside from it being impossible, she knew that the best thing for her was to remember it. And not in the way that she would actually mourn every day for the next thirty years; but in the way that she just acknowledged it happening at all. She'd been pregnant, and then she hadn't been. The world hadn't ended, and she was okay with that. She'd moved on.

But moving on still didn't stop her from worrying, and worrying was never good when you had no one else to talk to. She always had Bickslow, sure, but right then, Lucy really just wanted to talk to Sara and Saskia about it. Because it was relevant.

And the fact that she was in a wedding dress that didn't fit her in the middle of dress shop didn't bother her so much anymore.

"It's just I'm a little worried that I might not be _able_ to get pregnant again," Lucy finally whispered as she shrugged again.

"Again?" Saskia repeated. "You mean, you and Bicks…?"

She nodded. "I got pregnant a few months before we broke up, and then miscaried right before we did," she said quietly. "But… But that's not why we broke up, in case you thought it was," Lucy quickly added on. They'd never really mentioned just why they'd broken up, but the last thing Lucy wanted was Bickslow's sisters thinking that he was kind of a terrible person. Because he wasn't. "Bickslow didn't even know about it then. I didn't tell him until just before we got back together this year. It was just… It was a difficult time back then and there was a lot going on, that's all…"

Neither of the sisters doubted that it had been a difficult time for Lucy and Bickslow when they'd broken up, though now they only thought that Lucy had been worse off. Sara especially knew that it wasn't exactly the easiest thing to deal with, but even then, she hadn't had to cope all by herself. She'd had Rory to make things easier, but Lucy hadn't had Bickslow. And in a way, Sara almost admired Lucy. She didn't really get why Lucy hadn't told Bickslow about the baby, but that wasn't really all that important anymore. What did happen to be important right then was that they eased her worry, and Sara knew they could do that.

"Lucy, I'm sure you've got absolutely nothing to worry about," Sara said. "Those kinds of things just happen sometimes. It doesn't mean anything is wrong."

"I know that… But still…"

"I still had the twins, and look how great they are!" Sara added, though admittedly, she was already questioning her choice of words. Her boys really weren't anything close to being poster children – they were goddamn nightmares putting it lightly – but to her, they were still perfect (especially when they were asleep) and they were really her energetic little blessings.

Lucy couldn't help but look up to Sara in surprise. "Wait, are you saying that you—"

Sara nodded. "Twice actually. So I know how you're feeling, I really do."

"Oh… Well, I'm… I'm sorry," Lucy mumbled. Though as sorry as she was for Sara, just because it sucked and Lucy really knew that all too well, Lucy was just weirdly glad that Sara actually knew how she felt. No one she knew had understood how it had made her feel – not even Bickslow had been able to do that. Lucy just didn't feel quite so alone all of a sudden, especially with Mira and Laxus having Jax, and with Levy and Gajeel getting closer to having their little one with each passing day.

"Oh, honey. There's no need to be sorry. It happens. There's nothing we can do about it. But I know how hard it is to keep your head up, especially when it feels like you're suddenly the only one who _isn't_ knocked up. God, you have no idea how much I hated Sas when she found out about Layls."

"It's true," Saskia chimed in from the other side. "She really hated me. Completely ignored me for two whole months."

Lucy couldn't help but giggle.

"I think Bicks mentioned something about you both being godparents now the other day?" Sara asked.

Lucy nodded. "His name is Jackson. Well, Jax, actually. He's, uh, about five months old now. Laxus and Mira don't really bring him into the guild much though, so we don't really see him very often…"

"And… And he said something about friends of yours having a baby soon as well?"

"She's due around the middle of the year I think."

"That must be at least a little difficult," Saskia said softly.

Lucy shrugged as she stared down to her hands. "Honestly, it's not that hard. I mean, Levy's my best friend and I'm ridiculously happy for her. And… And Jax is really adorable…" she began cautiously. Lucy briefly wondered if she should tell them about how Bickslow was taking everything, but it was only _briefly_ because Lucy was just enjoying being able to talk to someone about how she felt – and with people who understood her, too. And even if Bickslow didn't want his sisters to know how hard he'd been finding things, there was nothing saying he had to _know_ that she'd told his sisters. Lucy was sure the twins could keep a secret. And even then, Lucy had already said far more than she should've, so what did it matter if she opened her mouth a little more? Talking was no doubt good for her, too. So with a deep breath, Lucy continued, "But Bickslow… He's not exactly the biggest fan of it all. I mean, he's happy because they're our friends, but because I couldn't tell him about the baby until we really got back together, he's still, um… He's still kind of dealing with it all, I guess. It's been hard for him…"

"Aw, the poor thing," Sara murmured. "How's it been?"

"I don't know," Lucy sighed. "It hasn't been _horrible_ though. Bicks has just… He's been kind of sad, you know? Partly because he still feels bad that he wasn't there for me, but it wasn't like that was his fault because I didn't tell him and us breaking up was really for the best… But it's also partly because he just really, _really_ wants a baby…"

"No kidding!" Saskia gasped.

"Not even a little bit. He still can't help but bring it up every now and then even though he knows we agreed not to talk about the entire kids thing because it's kind of an uncomfortable topic. And I mean, I know he doesn't mean to make me feel bad for miscarrying and all, but… It kind of hurts, you know?"

Saskia shook her head as she sighed, "Men. Completely useless."

"He's not _completely_ useless," Lucy giggled. _Just… a little. Sometimes._ Because Bickslow was a guy.

"Gosh, all I can picture right now is _Bickslow_ as a baby!" Sara chimed in.

"But now he's all grown up!" Saskia added. "And he so _totally_ has baby fever."

"Oh, for sure. God, it's so adorable!"

"I'm beginning to see why Bicks said he didn't want you knowing about the whole baby thing…" Lucy mumbled. She remembered him saying something about how he was sure they wouldn't leave him alone if they knew, and now Lucy got what he meant. They'd just latched onto that idea and now Lucy was sure they would never let go.

"Oh, that's right," Saskia laughed. "We're not supposed to know any of this at all!"

Sara nodded and was then turning her attention back to Lucy with a softer smile. "But Lucy, I'm positive you have absolutely nothing to worry about," she said. "You and Bicks will have a baby one day. Just don't get discouraged, okay? It'll happen."

"And, you know, it probably won't happen when you expect it, either," Saskia added just as gently. "That's part of what makes it so exciting! But it'll happen one way or another. We know it will."

Lucy nodded and felt herself sigh in relief. "I guess you're right." It'll happen one day. She and Bickslow would have their own family at some point. She knew that. And Lucy knew that she really did just have to not give up like she was already tempted to do and she hadn't even started anything yet. Things would work out in the end. And oh, was she so glad to have actually gotten everything out. Already Lucy felt a little better. "And Sara, Saskia – thank you for this. I really mean it."

"For what?"

"For listening, mostly. I just… I think I really needed this, and I needed to hear all of what you both said, so… So I'm grateful for it all." She gestured around to the room and to all the dresses on the walls and mannequins as she added, "And even for bringing me here this morning. This has been amazing."

"Aw, Lucy, there's no need to thank us," Sara said. "We're family now, remember? This is just what we do."

"Well, I still want to thank you regardless."

Saskia rolled her eyes as she got up from the sofa so she could go and finally find where her daughter had disappeared to. "Then in that case, you're welcome," she smirked. "But for now, how about we go get that lunch we promised you?"

"That sounds like a wonderful idea."

* * *

The two sets of footsteps coming from the hall had Lucy jolting awake. The bedside lamp was still on and the book she'd been reading before she'd decided to close her eyes for just a few minutes was still open beside her. She knew she'd ended up closing her eyes for more than just a few minutes, though even having just woken up Lucy was almost struggling to keep her eyes open, but she had no idea just how long she'd been asleep for. Lucy knew it was late though, because the house was almost completely silent, just like it had been when she'd apparently dozed off.

She knew the footsteps in the hall were just Xander and Bickslow finally getting back, so she wasn't surprised to see Bickslow walking in through the bedroom door just a few moments later.

Bickslow only frowned when he saw that Lucy was just waking up though, so he was only closing the door behind him as softly as he could before heading to the dresser to grab something to sleep in. "Sorry, baby," he whispered. "I didn't wake you, did I?"

Lucy shook her head. "Not really. I wanted to stay up to see you. I just must've dozed off before," she said softly. After getting back from lunch after trying on dresses, she'd only been able to talk to Bickslow for all of maybe ten minutes before he'd been whisked off by his brothers-in-law for the second time in one day. Lucy knew she shouldn't have cared all that much about her fiancé being gone for almost the entire day, just because it was their last day in Crocus and Bickslow was better off spending his time with his family than her while he still could, but she'd just missed him. She couldn't help that. And granted, it meant she'd been able to spend the rest of the afternoon with Bickslow's sisters as well as all of their children which had been all kinds of fun, but she still wished just a little bit that Bickslow had been there too. She had more fun watching Bickslow with his niece and nephews than actually playing with them herself. But still, she'd wanted to stay up to wait for Bickslow to get back, just so she could hear all about his adventures for that day, and it made being awake right then totally worth it, because she suspected Bickslow and his brothers-in-law had been getting into at least a little bit of mischief. "What time is it anyway?"

"Almost one I think."

"Wow. You boys must have had fun then."

"I guess so," Bickslow chuckled. Changed for bed, he quickly climbed in and made himself comfortable next to Lucy after leaning forward to just to gently press his lips to hers. "You shouldn't have waited up for me though."

"Yeah, I know… But I wanted to. We haven't really seen each other today and I didn't want to wait until morning to talk to you," she whispered.

Bickslow sighed as he wrapped his arm around Lucy to pull her in against him. "I know we haven't. I'm sorry, baby."

"Hey, don't be sorry. We came here so you could spend time with your family. That means you're not allowed to be sorry for spending the day with them."

"I suppose so…" Bickslow mumbled. "But, it really would've been nice being able to see you for more than like ten minutes before they dragged me off again. It's the holidays after all…" Surely he wasn't a bad guy for wanting to spend his holidays with his _entire_ family, which did of course include Lucy.

Lucy only laughed gently before tilting her head up to quickly kiss Bickslow again. "Now _that_ I agree with. But come on, tell me about your day. Just what did you get up to with the guys today?"

"Ah, well. This morning we went to the park for a little while," he said as he settled himself comfortably again. "Jasper fell off the swings."

"Oh _,_ so _that_ explains the bandage on his forehead," Lucy guessed.

Bickslow shook his head with a smirk on his mouth. "That was because Damian threw a rock at him."

Lucy could only roll her eyes. _Boys_. She'd be perfectly fine with all her children being girls.

"After that it was to the emergency room so Jasper could get his head fixed and all. Thankfully he didn't need stitches or anything," Bickslow continued. "Then, once Jasper was sorted, we had to go and get ice-cream, even though it was only eleven in the morning. Then there was this like, concert on near um… What's the name of that stupid castle?"

"Mercurius."

"That's the one! So anyway, there was this concert thing near there that we took the kids to. I still don't even really know just what it was, but there was one chick in a giant fucking sunflower costume, a dude dressed as a crayon, and a magician that was _literally_ wearing a fucking penguin suit."

"Sounds a little interesting," she giggled.

"I still have a headache from the hours' worth of screaming children and babies I had to endure," the Seith mage muttered bitterly. Really, for most of that hour he'd only found himself wondering just why the fuck he actually wanted kids. Because kids scream and Bickslow just didn't do screaming – or at least not that kind of screaming at least.

"Aw, my poor Pixie." Lucy knew that Bickslow wasn't really as annoyed as he made himself seem. He probably was hating the fact he had a headache at all because she'd been with him long enough to know that he usually wanted to do nothing but sleep when he had even the tiniest of headaches. But aside from being weirdly proud that he'd put up with it all day just so he could get to spend time with his family, Lucy knew that Bickslow probably thought his pain was worth it, too. "What about this afternoon though?" she asked. "Where did Xander and Rory drag you off to in a rush earlier?"

"Ah, well…" He couldn't do anything about the smirk that tugged at the corner of his mouth. "This afternoon was just them trying to cram as much knowledge about parenting and all that into my head as they could." Most of what Rory and Xander had told him over the course of the rest of the afternoon and the entire night had gone in one ear and out the other, but some of it he'd actually retained, though that was mostly just because they'd made a point of repeating it every five minutes – like, don't piss off your wife when she's carrying your child. Bickslow had lost count of how many times he'd heard that over the night.

But still, Bickslow had never expected his afternoon to go the way it had. But from what he'd later found out, he knew that Rory and Xander dragging him out to almost every single store in Crocus that sold anything even remotely associated with babies and children just to tell him about all the _wonderfully_ expensive things he absolutely needed to buy at some point in the future, hadn't exactly been planned. The entire trip had been rather impulsive, but once Bickslow had found out the reason for his impromptu parenting masterclass, it had all made perfect sense.

And since Bickslow was completely certain that Lucy had absolutely no clue about what had happened that afternoon, he couldn't help but find how confused she was about just what it was he'd meant completely adorable.

But then it clicked, and all the colour seemed to instantly drain from her face. There was only one reason Bickslow's family would be deciding to suddenly want to give him parenting tips. "Oh no…" she whispered. "You know that I…"

"That you told my sisters about the entire baby thing?" he finished for her. "Yeah. I know."

Lucy grimaced and tried her best to hide her face in her pillow. She'd felt really great after telling Sara and Saskia about everything from her miscarriage to trying to have a baby in the next year. But even being really glad that she had told them, Lucy had still been just a little worried about whether or not it had actually been the right thing to do, because she knew how Bickslow hadn't wanted them to know and just why he hadn't wanted them to, yet she'd still gone and opened her mouth anyway.

She'd thought it would be okay, though. She'd just thought and hoped that Sara and Saskia would keep it between them like she'd asked them to promise to do. She'd just assumed that their word would be enough.

But apparently not. Because somehow Bickslow had found out that she'd opened her big mouth anyway – which Lucy was realising right then that she shouldn't have done at all, regardless of how relieved it had made her, because it was hers and Bickslow's thing and no one else's – and now she was feeling utterly horrible. Lucy didn't have a clue as to just how Bickslow had found out, or just how much he knew, but she had a feeling that it was somehow connected to how Sara had gone off to run some errands just after Bickslow had been dragged off again.

"God, Bicks… I'm so sorry," she groaned into the pillow. "I know you didn't want them knowing yet that we wanted to have a baby or anything… But they just… They just kept asking about the wedding and I didn't really know how to answer without telling them about it. And then I just… I really wanted to tell them and I really am sorry, Bickslow."

"Lucy, it's fine."

"Are you mad at me? _Please_ don't be mad at me."

 _Mad at her?_ Bickslow couldn't figure out for the life of him just why he'd be mad at Lucy for talking to his sisters. "I'm not mad at you. Why on earth would I be mad at you?"

"Well, because… Because I told them how excited you are for us to have a family," Lucy answered guiltily. Regardless of how much Bickslow had already found out about how much of a horrible fiancée she'd been that day, Lucy figured it was for the best that she at least owned up to just what she'd done and said. She hoped it would make Bickslow be just a little less disappointed in her.

"Mm-hmm. I know you did."

"And I told them how I lost the baby before… And that you're still kind of upset by it…"

"Yup."

Lucy's brow creased a little as she stared at the Seith mage with growing confusion. She was sure she was missing something. "I, um… I told them about Jax and how you were with him, too," she continued. "And how you're a little jealous of Levy of Gajeel as well…"

"I know." There really wasn't much he didn't know at that point. What Rory and Xander hadn't told him after they'd kidnapped him earlier in the afternoon, Bickslow had found out from Sara after they'd _miraculously_ run into her on their way from one store to the next. She'd claimed to be checking on their fancy little snow globe store, but even not knowing his way around Crocus so well that he could do it with his eyes closed, Bickslow had known that his sister had been lying. She'd never been particularly good at acting. How their parents had ever believed them, Bickslow had no idea.

But Bickslow's lack of reaction was confusing Lucy more than she cared to admit. He should be mad at her! He should be telling her that he was _hurt_ by what she'd done, or maybe just straight up ignoring her. That was what she'd be doing if Bickslow had gone and done something she'd specifically asked he _not_ do. At the very least she wouldn't be acting like she was perfectly fine. So for the life of her, she just couldn't see why Bickslow was doing just that.

"You… You shouldn't be like this…" she whispered as her brow furrowed even more. "Why aren't you mad at me? You should be mad at me! What am I missing here?"

Bickslow shrugged before answering simply with a small smile, "You're not missing a thing. I'm not mad at you."

"But you _should_ be…"

"But I'm _not_."

She frowned back at him. She was completely certain she was missing something, no matter what Bickslow said. "Why aren't you mad at me?"

"Because I'm just happy that you actually felt like you could tell Sara and Sas about the baby and everything," he answered. And sure, Bickslow would admit that he did wish just a tiny bit that Lucy hadn't talked to his sisters about the entire situation, just because he wouldn't have had to spend the entire afternoon looking at baby things he wouldn't be buying for at least a little while, or listen to Rory and Xander give him a million tips on what to do and not do when it came to being a dad and all then (although the fact they'd ended up at a bar eating greasy bar food and unfortunately _not_ getting drunk had made it just a little more bearable). But other than that, he was oddly _ecstatic_ that Lucy had talked to his sisters about the whole baby situation. He'd endure whatever his sisters (and brothers-in-law) wanted to inflict on him just because of how much he loved what Lucy had done.

"You're… happy about it?" Lucy whispered, unable to do anything but stare at the Seith mage in astonishment.

Bickslow nodded. "I know you don't like bringing up how you lost the baby before. And, you know, that's fine and all. You know I don't mind that you don't like talking about it because I know how it still makes you a little upset when _I_ bring it up and you know that upsetting you is the last thing I ever want to do…"

"I know that…"

"But you talked to _them_ about it, and you have no idea how unbelievably happy that makes me," he said with a quick press of his lips to hers when she still just looked at him with wide and confused eyes. "All I wanted was for you to feel like you could go to them, because they're your family now and you should be able to talk to them about… About anything, really. And they all really love you, by the way. I'm almost convinced my sisters like you more than they do me."

"I'm sure that's not true," she laughed weakly.

"Well, it's gotta be close," Bickslow chuckled. "But I'm just… I'm happy that you told them. And I'm kinda proud, too, because you haven't really talked much about it at all with anyone else, and, you know, I think it's a good thing that you told someone else." He knew that Lucy had talked to Laxus a little bit about the whole thing, and that Levy and Gajeel had known for a while too, but even Laxus didn't really know much more than the fact that it had happened. And Bickslow had really been fine with Lucy deciding that she didn't want to talk about it anymore, and he still didn't think the entire miscarriage situation was something that she _should_ be openly talking about or anything, but he still liked that she'd been comfortable enough with his sisters to tell them about it. Because talking was supposed to be good for dealing with difficult things like that, and he didn't want Lucy feeling like she _couldn't_ talk to anyone about anything ever again.

He'd just wanted her to know that there were always people to talk to if she ever wanted to. And just knowing that his sisters were some of those people to her meant the absolute world to him.

He was just glad that Lucy was at a point where she could talk about it, too. He really did think it was a good thing.

"W-Well… I actually felt a little relieved, I guess, after telling them…" she admitted quietly.

"Sara said she thought you looked like you'd had a bit of a load taken off you," Bickslow said. And Lucy feeling relieved made sense to him, too. He knew how worried she was about maybe not getting pregnant again. But with what Sara had told him about their talk (which was basically everything, including how she and Rory had had their own trouble starting their family), Bickslow couldn't be more grateful for his sisters right then – especially for Sara. They'd helped Lucy where he hadn't been able to and eased her worries in a way he didn't think he'd _ever_ have been able to.

Lucy couldn't help but roll her eyes. _So Sara really did disappear to go talk to Bicks… somehow… somewhere._ But strangely, Lucy wasn't all that interested in knowing just how Sara had managed to find Bickslow to tell him seemingly _everything_ (she just assumed Rory had told her where they'd be taking Bickslow). All Lucy wanted to know was if Bickslow truly meant it when he said he wasn't mad at her.

So she asked just that when she worried she might end up making her lip bleed if she chewed on it any more. "So are you really not mad at me for telling them so much?" she asked nervously.

"Not at all."

"Not even a little bit?" Because she'd take Bickslow being even just a little mad at her. She deserved that.

Bickslow just smiled at her as he brought his hand up to cup her cheek. "I absolutely, positively _promise_ that I'm not even the slightest bit mad at you, and I know how much you love promises," he assured her softly, and was then pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. He was incapable of being mad at Lucy for absolutely anything at that point in his life, and he was enjoying the hell out of it while it lasted.

But if Bickslow promised, then Lucy just had to believe him.

So when Lucy just hummed and cuddled up to him to get ready to sleep, Bickslow only had two of the babies fly over to the lamp behind her to silently switch off the light for them. He could just close his eyes and finally go to sleep like Lucy was, but he wasn't quite ready to. Just for a little bit longer he wanted to stay awake to talk with Lucy, just because it felt so strange to have been so busy that all he'd been able to do that day was have breakfast with her, not including the ten or so minutes they'd both been back at Saskia's between their outings.

It was just a matter of deciding what to talk about then, but Bickslow was quickly realising that mentioning he happened to walk past the bridal store that Lucy had been dragged to that morning and seen her trying on wedding dresses didn't seem like a good idea. He'd even had his four-year-old nephews drag him away from the window, he'd been standing there for so long with an apparently stupid grin on his face (according to Xander, anyway). It was just a good thing he hadn't managed to get ice-cream on himself in his slight daze…

But since it was their last night in Crocus and their little trip was coming to another pleasant end, Bickslow knew exactly what to talk about before Lucy managed to fall asleep on him.

"So are you ready to go home tomorrow?" he asked her softly.

Lucy didn't even bother opening her eyes as she first let out a tired sigh. "You know what? As glad as I am that I agreed to spending Christmas here with your family, I'm so looking forward to getting home and seeing the guild." It had really only been a week, but she missed everyone. It had still been her first holiday away from the guild since joining and it had just felt a little strange to be away from everyone, despite how much she'd enjoyed being in Crocus that time around. She was so excited about being able to finally give her team and everyone else the presents she'd gotten for them, too. Even Bickslow still had presents to give, but they'd made everyone promise to wait until they got back so they could have them all over for a slightly delayed (and also second) Christmas party. Of course, having their teams in the one living room was probably going to be slightly disastrous, but they figured they should probably start trying to find a way to actually start getting along with each other.

Or, maybe just Natsu and Laxus. And Erza too, probably.

"Mm, me too," Bickslow murmured. "You still have two more presents to get when we're home, too." And oh, was he excited to finally give her those. He was still just a little worried about the house, but he just kept telling himself that Lucy would love it like he'd thought and hoped she would.

"Two more? Really? God, Bicks… You've already spoiled enough. I can't even imagine just what else there is."

"Ah, perfect."

"But speaking of gifts…" Lucy opened her eyes again as a smirk pulled at the corner of her mouth, and she looked to the Seith mage in the almost pitch black room. "I still have another one for you."

"Oh? Is that so?"

"Mm-hmm."

"Does this gift happen to be red?" he asked. "And perhaps just a little bit… lacy?" Bickslow already knew exactly what his so called present was, because he'd only been working on convincing Lucy to actually go through with it all for _months_ at that point. He was really looking forward to it, too, because really, what was there not to love about seeing his fiancée in fancy lingerie that she'd just happened to be wearing in an awful magazine shoot?

But of course, Bickslow was well aware of the fact that Lucy had packed said fancy red lingerie for their trip since it was supposed to have been an actual Christmas present… But then the whole sister-in-the-next room thing had turned out to be an epic mood killer.

"You know perfectly well that it is," she giggled quietly before she continued just a tiny bit nervously, "But, you'll still have to wait another few days at least for that particular present…"

"Oh, come on," he groaned. "Really?" The world was out to get him apparently.

"Sorry," she said half-heartedly.

"Okay, but, you know I don't care though, right? And… And I heard it can feel better then anyway! Well, for you, I mean. Because… Well, I don't know why, really, but still!"

Lucy grimaced. "Bickslow, the answer is still no." She didn't think her answer would be changing anytime soon, if at all. There was just nothing appealing about sleeping with the guy while she was on her period, no matter how many time Bickslow told her that he really didn't care.

"I don't see what the big deal is," he continued. Was he that desperate to get laid? Possibly. But he still didn't really care much about it. "We could just like, I don't know… Put a towel down or something. And use a condom, too."

"I can count on one hand the amount of times you've used a condom in all the time we've been together."

"Yeah… Please don't remind me of how ridiculously stupid we are. But there's the shower, too. Shower sex is fun."

Lucy only rolled her eyes as she pulled herself away from the Seith mage just to turn her back to him and get comfortable to finally go to sleep. She really wasn't going to be having that conversation for a second longer. "Bickslow, I'm not having sex with you while I'm bleeding from my vagina."

 _Well, when you put it that way._ "…You always did have a way with words…" he mumbled, and then conceding his defeat (again), he was only leaning forward to kiss her cheek and finally saying goodnight.

* * *

"I swear to god, if this is one of your pranks, I will marry you just to divorce you," Lucy threatened half-heartedly as she continued to let a Seith mage guide her through Magnolia while wearing a blindfold.

They'd only been back in Magnolia for all of an hour after getting back from Crocus before Bickslow had been telling her that they needed to make a little detour before they made their way over to the guild for the New Year's Eve celebration. An hour had really been _just_ enough time to relax for a little bit before showering and getting something to eat, but that had just been because they'd ended up leaving Crocus far later than they should've – mostly just because Sara and Saskia had finally gotten a chance to get to Bickslow and they'd really needed to tease him and gush about how cute he'd been little (in which every single one of his baby photos had been brought out, which had been great for Lucy), and how excited they were that their baby brother (by technically all of four years) was all about having his own spawn.

But still, being led blindly through a town at night was really not what Lucy had expected when Bickslow had said they needed to take a detour. She trusted the guy with her life, but that guy also happened to have a fondness for jokes and pranks.

"I promise you that this isn't a prank," Bickslow chuckled.

"Then what?" she asked. She doubted Bickslow would tell her anyway, but she still had to ask. She was almost dying to know what was going on, and when they came to a stop just a moment later and she felt Bickslow spin her to the left, her curiosity grew even more. "Are you going to let me see now?"

"As a matter of fact, I am," he replied, and carefully, Bickslow was untying the folded strip of fabric and pulling it away from Lucy's eyes and tucking it into his pocket.

Finally being able to see where they were, Lucy only found herself even more confused and curious about what was going on. She looked around at the street they were standing on first in an attempt to try and figure it out on her own.

She recognised the street they were on, even with most of the formerly damaged buildings in that area having finished being repaired and remodelled already. But recognising it wasn't enough to make Lucy know why Bickslow was grinning at her expectantly and in waiting. So she looked to the buildings themselves next, and the first one she looked to was the one they were standing right in front of; with the small, empty flower beds in front of the narrow basement windows at the very front and on either side of the stairs up to the front door. But the simple brick home with the too inviting front steps didn't make sense to Lucy either, just like all the other buildings around her on that familiar street.

She just couldn't for the life of her figure out why Bickslow had brought her to that particular spot.

She folded her arms around herself when the wind picked up and bit through her coat as she finally turned to Bickslow for an answer. "Are you going to explain why we're here now?"

It was tempting, but Bickslow was going to make her wait just a little bit longer. That was all just part of the surprise. "Not yet," he replied with an all too wicked grin, and was then just fishing a small set of keys out of another pocket and heading towards the front steps of the unfinished house that he still really hoped Lucy would love. "But what I will say," Bickslow continued as he turned back to Lucy before opening up the door. "Is that those other Christmas presents I promised you happen to be inside."

"W-Wait, really?"

 _Sort of._ "Yup." Finally pulling the door open, Bickslow let Lucy go in before him to the dark entryway, and then the babies were going around to the rooms on either side of them to turn on the lights that were still working just so they weren't in complete darkness. He was just so nervous and excited right then that he was sure his hands were almost shaking, but he wasn't quite ready to blurt out he'd bought his girlfriend a house for Christmas.

Lucy only peeked into the rooms on either side of the entryway before looking back to Bickslow with a still slightly confused smile. How an _empty_ and slightly dilapidated house had anything to do with Christmas presents at all, she didn't quite know. "So? How exactly are my supposed Christmas presents inside here?" she wondered.

"Ah. Well, the first one is kind of inside since I had it with me," Bickslow admitted, and was then reaching into the inside pocket of his cloak to pull out the neatly wrapped present that had fit snugly inside it. He was nervous just watching Lucy open that one and it wasn't even that bad, but even as nervous as he was, he was still mostly excited. And if it was one thing Bickslow had come to hate, it was just how Lucy opened her presents – far too carefully and with more precision than necessary. "Oh, come on. It's just paper. Rip it already," he laughed impatiently.

Lucy rolled her eyes at him as she finished tearing the paper as carefully as she could, just because it was far too entertaining to watch Bickslow get impatient and squirm. "Oh, shush, you." Lucy already knew it was a book just from the way it had sat in her hands, but when she'd finished peeling the festive _purple_ wrapping paper from it, she hadn't exactly expected to see the light blue cover with the cartoon baby rattle on the front of it.

Bickslow was already jumping into an explanation as soon as she'd even seen what it was and saving her from asking. "It's a baby name book," he said first. "And I just thought that, you know, since you said you wanted to start trying after, that it could be nice to have."

Lucy was already sure that the book of baby names was her absolute favourite of all her presents from Bickslow that year, or maybe even _ever_. She could even see why Bickslow had waited until they were back to give that one to her, because opening that one in front of the entire family might have been just a little chaotic. Just the two of them made it a much more wonderful and personal gift. "Bickslow, this is great," she whispered. "I think it'll be _more_ than nice to have."

"I mean, it's not like you'd have to start reading it right away or even anytime soon or anything," Bickslow continued nervously. Because he had to make sure that Lucy knew that she didn't need to even _touch_ it until she wanted it. It could sit on a shelf for the next decade for all he cared, to be perfectly honest. He just thought it would be nice to have there in case she wanted to use it. "But eventually it could come in handy, right? And I just… I know that when we do have a kid one day, that you'll want to make sure they have the perfect name."

She rose up to stand on her tip-toes as she tucked the book in against her chest with one arm, and was pressing her lips softly to Bickslow's to stop him from trying to make her love the book more than she already did. "This is perfect, really. I love it, Bicks."

"Well, I'm… I'm glad you like it."

"Now, what about this other present you promised me?"

"Um, well… First, can you promise not to freak out or get mad or anything?"

Lucy had to admit she was just a little worried about why Bickslow was asking her to promise that, and she suspected that the second gift was going to be more than a little odd because there was a strange air of uncertainty around Bickslow, but at the very least, Lucy would try her best to stay calm. "Of course. I promise."

Bickslow was having to take a deep breath to calm his nerves, and was only shrugging and lifting his arms to vaguely gesture to the room they were in as he smiled hopefully and finally said, "Well, you're kind of standing in it."

"Standing in it? What do you mean?"

"I mean that this place… This _house_ …" He could already see how Lucy was suddenly understanding him as she stared up at him in complete shock, and all he could do was shrug again. "It's yours."

But surely he had to actually mean something else by that. Maybe he just meant that there was something _inside_ the house that was hers (because he had said that her presents were inside, after all), and he didn't actually mean the house itself. "You don't mean… You didn't…"

"I didn't buy you a house?" Bickslow grimaced. He really didn't think he'd ever been so anxious before. "Yeah, I bought you a house."

"You did not."

"Well, I mean… It's not _yours_ yours, because it's legally in my name and all, but it's… It's ours, maybe. So, it's yours."

Lucy really wasn't sure how to feel right then. Part of her wanted to just pull a Levy and hit Bickslow repeatedly with the book of baby names for being so ridiculously _stupid_ – who the hell in their right mind buys a house as a Christmas present? And even then, who the hell buys a house without telling their partner about it? Bickslow was obviously just out of his goddamn mind.

But… There was a much larger part of her (one that Lucy admittedly hated just a little bit right then) that only wanted to scream and squeal and jump around, because he'd had bought her a goddamn _house_ and she was feeling pretty special right then. And the longer she just stared at Bickslow and watched as he grew more and more anxious and uncomfortable as she processed it, the wider her smile grew, and soon she was giggling just a little hysterically. "You actually bought a house… Holy crap." She suddenly felt like she was in a bit of a daze as she turned away from Bickslow just to begin exploring.

Bickslow couldn't tell what was going on, though. He liked to think that her laughing was a good thing, but honestly, he just had no idea. All he could do was begin to follow her around and _hope_ that it was a good thing. "And I'm really sorry for doing it without you and all, because I know we didn't even really talk about getting a house at all, but I just… I saw this place a couple of weeks ago and—"

"Oh gosh, these ceilings! Look how high they are!" Lucy gasped as she twirled around in the middle of what would've been the lounge room before she set her sights on the pewter coloured marble fireplace opposite the archway. "And oh god, this fireplace! It's so beautiful!"

"Um, y-yeah, it is…" he mumbled. _Is she even listening to me?_ "But… But I saw this place before and I just… I just completely fell in love in with it, and an hour later I was at the bank and signing the paperwork."

Lucy walked around the old desk that sat in the middle of the other end of the room. "This would be a nice reading area, wouldn't it?" she mused. She completely missed the stunned expression on her fiancé's face as she turned to the wide windows behind her. "I think some shelves would be nice on both walls. And maybe a small desk below this window, or a big, cosy chair over here!"

It was almost as if she'd found a way to read his mind, and Bickslow didn't know how she'd done it. He was convinced she hadn't even been listening to him anyway, but all he could do then was follow her around the rest of the house and just listen to her thoughts on what they could do in each room. Even when they made it to the kitchen that had been completely ripped out by that point and the back wall was completely missing, Lucy just kept going. Everything he'd seen when he'd first walked into that house a few weeks earlier, Lucy could see too.

And the more Lucy explored the house she knew would one day become her home, the more she fell in love with it. She was well aware that it needed a lot of work done to it before it was even liveable at all, but that didn't bother her in the slightest. That was what she _loved_ about it. They could make the house completely theirs, and they could make it their perfect little home for their perfect little family that would one day come to exist.

* * *

 _Firstly, I just want to apologise for not updating this in a little while. But as far as that goes, I'll come back to that in a minute._

 _Secondly, I did just want to also mention that this story is slowly but surely coming to a close. I'm sad. Really. I've had the last chapters planned out for a little while now, and just seeing that it will be ending so soon is making me already miss this story, because this story is my baby. Don't even ask how that's possible, but it is. I'm not going to say how many chapters are left just yet, because with how little I update this lately, you'll still be seeing updates on this for **at least** the next six to eight months... _

_But anyway. Back to my first point._

 _I'm well aware that I've been neglecting this (as well as A Peculiar Situation) lately, but I'm still at uni full time and that's still my priority, so I don't have all that much free time. Add to that the fact that I've currently got **6** ongoing chapter stories (including this one), and that's not even counting stories like Neighbours From Hell, the Reaper/Angel AU, the GaLu/BixCo insanity, or even the newer BixLu collection. But I know, I shouldn't have so many projects at once, but I can't help myself. _

_But anyway. This and APS are my biggest stories at the moment, and at this point, they're the hardest to work on, which is why they will be going **on hold** until I've finished the semester and have time to actually go back and read (and possibly edit, like I said on my profile I'll do slowly) them. I'm not comfortable working on them at the moment because I haven't really worked on them in what feels like such a long time, and I do want to try and make what I update the best that it can possibly be, and I'll be the first to admit that I forget some things about my own stories. And I really don't thing that's such a good thing, because it means that I'll be writing new chapters and forgetting about small details that I've made plans to come back to at later chapters, if that makes sense. _

_Thankfully though, I finish classes in a few weeks and have six weeks off before exams, so I'll try and start working on these two so I don't have so much editing to do once my exams are finished. But at the very least, please, please, please do not expect any new chapters for this OR A Peculiar Situation until after November or December, depending on what I'm working on._

 _All of this is also on my profile, but since no one really reads profiles, I thought I'd add this. And just in case any of you read A Peculiar Situation, I thought I'd include that in here too since that is my main concern at the moment, as far as my memory for certain things in that goes._

 _So sorry for the long author's note. If you read this far, yay! I'm mostly focusing my time on various one-shots for **Match Made in the Stars** at this point, just because they're easier to work on while I'm busy, so most of my next updates will be for that. But as a reminder, my current works in progress are updated on my profile, so if you want to know what I'm working on, go check that out!_

 _\- April_


	52. Chapter 52

_I can't believe I haven't updated this since September... I'm so sorry for that. Really. I didn't forget about it though. I just had a major lack of inspiration for a while, and I was finishing up the semester and... Yeah, this got moved to the back burner for a while. But I finally got a chapter finished! It's shorter than usual, I know, but I didn't want to make this one too long. I ended up adding an extra chapter for my plan just because this one was so short and I didn't want to add too much to it, which means, at this point, this story will be finishing with Chapter 60. (But, this is only 52, so don't worry just yet!)_

 _But anyway. If the next few chapters feel as if they're a bit rushed, it's because they kind of are. There's a lot to get through, timeline wise, and I don't want to start repeating myself within the storyline, if that makes sense._

 _Also, holy shit, I can't believe this passed 500 followers. That's just... amazing. I'm speechless, honestly. I never even expected 50 followers for this when I first started writing (and sure, I know that only half the amount of people actually read it, but still...). You're all amazing creatures and I love you._

 _For now though, have some fluff. Or, at least I was aiming for fluff. And the end of this chapter just... Yeah, that was just me rambling at 2am and it wasn't at all how I'd planned on it going (there was supposed to be smut, damn it). But regardless, I hope you all enjoy the chapter! Thank you all for being so patient with me!_

* * *

With the new year came a whole lot of work. With the guild up and running again, flyers were coming in by the dozen each and every morning. By the end of the first week of January, the job board had been overflowing with requests, and Makarov had put his foot down (quite literally, and on top of Natsu) and told everyone to get off their lazy asses and start taking some jobs. Even Levy had ended up taking a few smaller jobs around town – mostly translating ones – but no matter how unlikely it was for the Script mage to get hurt while translating an ancient tome for the city library's archive, Gajeel had insisted upon going with her on each one. Once the tiny woman's baby bump had started to show, even just a little bit, Gajeel gotten annoyingly clingy and protective. So had Jet and Droy for that matter.

For Bickslow and Lucy, on the other hand, things just became straight up _busy_. Between taking jobs with their teams or even with each other (it was a rare occasion for them to actually get the opportunity to take a job together), and then going over to the new house every second they could just to meet up with the old owner and oversee the rest of the repairs, it was a miracle they had time to do anything together at all – although the second Lucy had been willing to actually let Bickslow into her pants again come the end of the _Great Flood_ , he'd been there.

As far as the house was concerned, Lucy was far more excited about the house than Bickslow had been at first, that much he was certain of. Ever since he'd shown it to her after getting back from Crocus, it was all she'd been able to talk about. Of course, once she'd gotten over the initial shock of finding out that the guy had bought her a damn house for Christmas, and remembered that he'd gone and blown his entire savings on something that she very well _could_ have hated, Lucy had most definitely given Bickslow a piece of his mind. When that had happened though, Bickslow had just reminded his lovely bride-to-be that he knew her better than he knew himself, so he'd been pretty damn confident that things would work out.

The workers didn't even return to the house until the second week of January, as per Hamilton's contract with them. The majority of the repairs had been done before Christmas and before Bickslow had even bought it, and after Bickslow had agreed to take on the smaller repairs – like the wallpaper and the repainting and even re-doing some of the wooden floors (surely it couldn't be that difficult) – the only things left to do to get the house in a somewhat liveable state were to rebuild the back wall and get the kitchen in.

It was a Tuesday, and bright on early on Valentine's Day when Bickslow's train was rolling back into Magnolia station. He would've much preferred to be waking up in his own bed, perhaps to Lucy's hair tickling his face as she leaned over him, and _not_ to Evergreen slapping his nose with her paper fan and shouting at him to get his ass up.

"Come on, wake up. We're here," Evergreen said as she stretched her arms up above her head.

Bickslow groaned as he pulled himself up. "Yeah, yeah… I'm up." Functioning though? Not even close. Yawning, he trudged along the train corridor, throwing his cloak back over his shoulders and fastening it after using it as a blanket for the night.

Once out of the station and on the quiet streets of Magnolia, Laxus couldn't help but wince and ask, "Do I even want to know what godforsaken hour it is right now?"

"I believe it's close to seven o'clock," Freed answered quickly. He reached into his coat for the pocket watch he kept there and opened it up. "Six thirty-eight to be exact."

Evergreen snickered quietly along with Bickslow as Laxus just groaned up towards the miraculously clear sky – at least for that time of year. It usually rained all through February. "Freed... Man…" Laxus whined. "I didn't want to know."

"But you—Oh… I see…" The Rune mage blushed slightly in his embarrassment. If his hair no longer smoothly laying down his back hadn't been enough of a clue that he wasn't a morning person in the slightest, then how embarrassed he was from failing to see the _rhetoric_ in his friend's question surely had to make it obvious. But anyone who knew Freed well already knew that he wasn't exactly the most useful when he'd just woken up. "But… Hang on…"

"Hm? What now?" Evergreen chimed in as she looked back over her shoulder to the green-haired man, seeing his brow become furrowed as they continued to walk along through the empty streets.

"Shouldn't you be used to waking up early, Laxus?" Freed asked.

"Eh? Why?"

"Well, because of Jackson, of course. I imagine you'd have to be up early with Mira most morning to take care of him when he wakes up."

Laxus shrugged. "Nah, not really. Jax has always been a good sleeper," he said. "Besides, the Demon's up before he usually is so she looks after him in the morning. I barely hear him." Jax had been sleeping through the night and right up until 7 a.m. until he'd been four months old anyway, so at just over seven months, Laxus had most definitely gotten used to being able to sleep in himself, as well – well, a little bit at least.

"Aw, you're such a slacker, Sparky," Bickslow chuckled.

"You wanna say that again, Bicks?"

"Don't let Mira do all the parenting," the Seith mage continued to tease as he increased his pace just to fall into stride with Laxus, throwing an arm over his shoulder once he did so and grinning widely. "C'mon, man. You gotta pick up the slack. Wake up first for a change. Let Mira sleep in or somethin'. I'm sure she'll appreciate you a lot more if you quit being a lazy-ass."

Laxus' glare was deadly, but no one else seemed to see it that way. Even Freed smirked to himself as Laxus just tried his best not to electrocute Bickslow. Lucy had told him off for that. "Yeah? And what gives you the right to call me a slacker, huh?" Laxus contended. No one got to call him a lazy parent, thank you very much – well, apart from Mira. "Last I checked, you didn't have kids."

Bickslow winced. "Ouch, man…"

Laxus had instantly regretted his words as soon as they'd come out of his mouth though. "Sorry. Didn't mean to bring that up," he mumbled. Laxus remembered all too well what Bickslow had been like just a few months earlier, right after he'd returned to Magnolia with the rest of the Raijinshuu. It hadn't been the best of times for Bickslow, and it sure as hell hadn't been the best of times for Laxus to have to sit there and feel guilty over the fact that _he_ could've told him about Lucy being pregnant so much earlier.

It didn't matter if they'd all moved past it by then, at least for the most part. Laxus knew it wasn't his place – and certainly hadn't been the time – to have reminded Bickslow of something that obviously still bothered him to some extent. And really, Laxus didn't even blame Bickslow for that. He'd probably be feeling the exact way if Mira had lost a baby as well.

Freed and Evergreen shared a look of concern when the other two mages fell silent. They both seemed to get the impression there was something they were missing, and neither seemed to really like that idea. Cautiously, Evergreen asked, "Is there something we're missing here? Why is Laxus saying he's sorry?"

"Don't worry 'bout it," Bickslow quickly answered. He'd never ended up telling Freed or Evergreen that Lucy had miscarried right before they'd gone their separate ways. He'd never ended up telling anyone, for that matter, just because he hadn't felt like it was his place to. The only people who did know were people that Lucy had told herself – like his sisters, and Wendy, and Levy – or because Wendy just hadn't been able to keep it to herself because of how worried she'd been, like Gajeel and Laxus.

And even if Bickslow did wish that he'd told his team, maybe just to avoid that kind of awkward _situation_ happening again, Bickslow didn't really think it was worth making Freed and Evergreen worry unnecessarily. It had happened so long ago, and Bickslow really just wanted to keep it in the past where it belonged.

Still, Laxus' comment had stung, even if Bickslow knew he really hadn't meant it – then again, he'd been an asshole and practically called Laxus a shitty parent, and Bickslow hadn't meant that either. But serious or not, it stung, and it only solidified Bickslow's desire to just get the hell back home and spend the day with Lucy.

Falling back from where he'd been walking in stride with Laxus, Bickslow rubbed the back of his neck and spoke up while he had the babies begin to form a platform on the ground. "You know what guys?" he began. The other three all stopped and turned to face him. "I think I'm just gonna split. I'm beat, and, well, I can't be bothered walking all the way home so I'll just take the babies back instead."

"Your house is only a few blocks away, isn't it?" Freed pointed out.

Bickslow shrugged as he stepped onto his makeshift platform and began to rise slowly. Sure, his apartment was only a ten minute walk away at the most, but that wasn't important. And he couldn't very well tell his team and Laxus that he wanted to avoid them for at least the rest of the day… "Yeah, well… What can I say? I'm lazy." Bickslow quickly waved and let the babies carry him up towards the sky before his team could question it any further. "See you around!"

Evergreen sighed quietly to herself once Bickslow disappeared behind the row of houses on their left. Although it wasn't unusual for Bickslow to use the dolls for his transport purposes – hell, it was unusual for him to walk anywhere himself unless it was just a few hundred metres – it was, however, strange that he'd done it so suddenly like that. He'd shifted so quickly that Evergreen could really help but worry about him – Bickslow had been the first one to truly be her friend all those years ago, after all.

"Is it just me, or was Bicks just acting really strange all of a sudden?" the Fairy mage wondered aloud.

Laxus was quick to answer, "He's fine." Of course, it was a lie – sort of – but it really wasn't his place to explain anything.

"Are you sure?" Evergreen pressed. "I mean, he did get all quiet right before you apologised – which, still, makes absolutely no sense at all. Why did you even apologise?"

"Doesn't matter why I did."

"Laxus…" Freed cautiously chimed in. "We do deserve to know if there's anything going on with Bickslow."

"Yeah, why you tellin' me that?" Laxus grumbled. He knew that just as well as Freed and Evergreen. The only difference was that Laxus _knew_ what was going on, but granted, it hadn't been because Bickslow or Lucy had trusted him enough to actually tell him. Still, it wasn't his place to tell Freed or Evergreen about any of it, about how Lucy had lost a baby and Bickslow hadn't even known until a year later. If Bickslow wanted them to know, then he had to tell them. But until that happened, Laxus had nothing to say.

"Well, because _you_ obviously know more than we do," Freed said. "And don't you think that's—"

"Just drop it, Freed," Laxus snapped at the Runes mage. Even Freed had to stop dead on the sidewalk for a second – he hadn't been expecting Laxus to react like that. "He's fine," Laxus said again. "So just quit asking about it." And much like Bickslow had wanted to just get the hell out of there, Laxus was feeling the same all of a sudden.

He had better places to be, like at home with Mira and Jax – not arguing with his friends about Bickslow. Muttering under his breath that he'd see them later, Laxus wasn't no time in channelling his magic into his body to disappear into the clear blue sky as a great flash of lightning. Freed merely patted the singed fibres of his sleeve with a distasteful frown once Laxus had left, and stepped over the burnt patch of ground to continue on his way home with Evergreen by his side.

"I do still think we deserve to know what's going on…" he said quietly.

Evergreen nodded in agreement. "I do, too."

Not too far away, Bickslow was stepping down from his babies just outside the front steps to his apartment, and pushing the wooden doors open to enter the quiet first floor hallway. He really was drained, but even more so after the brief yet awkward conversation with his team, and the climb up the stairs to his apartment that early morning seemed to take longer than usual. Finally reaching the door labelled 2A right next to the stairs, Bickslow sighed as he reached up to unclip both sides of his visor before fumbling around in his rucksack for his house keys. Except as soon as he got the key in the door and began twisting to unlock it, it was being pulled open from the inside and Bickslow had a pair of arms being thrown around him before he could even blink.

"Bicks!"

It took all of one single second for him to realise that it was Lucy with her arms around him and her lips pressing to his, and just being home again seemed to make Bickslow feel just that little bit more awake – and that was a feeling he was sure he'd never get sick of. But after a week and a half away, boy, did it feel good to be home. And Lucy was just as glad for Bickslow to back as he was himself. A week and a half wasn't long by any means, but she really did miss Bickslow when he was gone, especially when she wasn't out on her own jobs with Team Natsu.

Bickslow wasn't even the least bit surprised that Lucy was already awake, since she was still usually awake at the crack of dawn. But it definitely made getting home so early in the morning just that little bit nicer. "Well, I could sure get used to being welcomed home like this," Bickslow chuckled against his fiancée's lips. Glancing down quickly once he'd made it through his front door and closed it behind him with his boot, he added, "Just, you know, when you're wearing something cuter."

"Are my pyjama pants not cute?" Lucy teased. She thought they were cute. They had ducklings on them, and ducklings were cute. Therefore, her baby flue flannel pyjama pants were also cute. They were comfy, too, and that was what mattered.

"They're fucking adorable."

"Then I shall greet you in my ducky PJs every chance I get," the blonde giggled. Bickslow could only sigh as he dropped his visor, key, and bag down by the door – he'd lost that one before he'd even had a chance to win. Returning to her breakfast of oatmeal and tea sitting on the kitchen bench, Lucy took a small spoonful of the warm meal before asking, "Why are you back so early though? I mean, not that I'm complaining or anything…"

Bickslow grabbed a clean spoon from the dishrack and stole a bit of Lucy's oatmeal before answering, "Last train got cancelled last night 'cause of a fault with the tracks or something, so we got the first one out at like five o'clock or something." He paused to swallow, then added, "I don't know how you can eat this stuff. It's like all gross and stuff. It's like baby food."

Lucy pouted as she dragged the bowl out of his reach. "Don't eat it then. And it is _not_ like baby food." Although she did wonder just how Bickslow knew what baby food tasted like. But oatmeal was delicious, thank you very much. Especially with apples and honey.

"I'll take your word for it. Now…" He dropped the spoon into the sink then walked around to the other side of the counter. Lucy watched him suspiciously the entire time, but Bickslow didn't give her a chance to ask just what he was doing – or why he was grinning like the devil (which, had strangely become Lucy's favourite saying over the last few weeks) – before he quickly wrapped his arms around her middle and pulled her from the barstool.

She squealed once his arms were around her. "Bickslow! Put me—"

"I'm going to go take a shower," Bickslow finally finished his sentence while slowly carrying his giggling, kicking, and screaming fiancée away from the kitchen and towards the hall, his lecherous grin just becoming wider. "And you're going to join me."

It was Valentine's Day, after all, and Bickslow thought there was no better way to kick the day off than to fight for the hot water with his favourite human. Plus, he usually got _something_ out of showering with Lucy, so that was always worth it, too.

* * *

After the shower and breakfast (well, Bickslow's breakfast at least), Lucy headed over to the new house to meet up with Hamilton, with a sleepy Seith mage in tow. At that point, Lucy knew more about the work being done to it than Bickslow did, so when she told him as they walked over at a little before 9 a.m. that the workers were putting the bases of the kitchen cabinets in that day, Bickslow merely nodded, yawned, and said, _'Oh. Awesome.'_

He did think it was awesome though, especially since he didn't actually know how the new kitchen would look – all he knew was that there was going to be a lot of cabinets on one wall, the one separating the dining and kitchen from the hall – and to him, that just meant more room for snacks. He had no idea what kind of finish was going to be on the cabinets, whether the counter was going to be laminate, or marble, or granite… Or even if there was going to be an island. Lucy knew all of that, because she'd pretty much taken over the entire thing and honestly, Bickslow didn't even really care. If Lucy was happy, then he was happy. He couldn't care less about what the house looked like once it was finished, as long as it had four walls and a roof and he could raise his kids there…

Well, one day, at least. Since, really, Bickslow had no idea when that would happen, and neither did Lucy. The whole 'maybe, sort of, kind of trying to get pregnant' thing hadn't really changed anything for them. They weren't actively going out of their way to try and get her knocked up; if it happened, it happened, and that would be amazing. It was just the same as it always had been, if anything – minus the few days where Lucy had always tried to avoid fucking him _before_ they'd broken up, just because she hadn't really wanted to risk getting pregnant that much (not that it had done that well, since she'd still ended up pregnant in the first place).

Still, as far as what the house looked like, Bickslow didn't care. All he cared about was how happy Lucy was in it – though he still did stand by his opinion that it was, hands down, the perfect place for them. And thankfully Lucy agreed.

When they finally reached the house, only after Lucy decided to stop in at the little café on the corner of the street to pick up some coffee and croissants for the contractors, the workers were already stuck into their work for the day. Sawhorses and lacrima-powered drills and saws were set up in what was going to be the dining area, and the first of the cabinet frames were being set in their places.

Hamilton spied the two of them before they'd even had a chance to set any of the breakfast items down. "Lucy! Bickslow! I didn't expect to see you two here this morning."

Lucy spun at the voice and beamed at the older man before plucking one of the Styrofoam cups from the holder in Bickslow's hands to hand it to Hamilton. "Morning, Hamilton!" she said. "And, well, you know I like to come spend some time here when I can, plus we didn't have any plans. Right, Bickslow?"

The Seith mage shook his head. "Zero plans," he mumbled tiredly. Although right then, he would've much preferred to be at home and sleeping.

"Well, it's always a pleasure when you stop by," Hamilton said. He took a sip of the coffee and sighed in delight before setting it down on his table. "Mm, best coffee in town, I tell you."

"Definitely," Lucy agreed.

She excused herself then to go pass out of the rest of the coffees while they were still hot and set the bag of fresh croissants down somewhere that they wouldn't get covered in sawdust. Meanwhile, Bickslow decided to take a tour of his home-to-be, and found himself staring at a completely stripped bathroom – Lucy had failed to mention that the bathrooms were getting remodelled. "I don't even think I want to know how much this is going to be costing me…" he mumbled.

"A lot! A lot!" the babies giggled, and Bickslow could only sigh while turning to leave the stripped bathroom behind.

It was a good thing he did a lot of S-Class jobs…

When he found Lucy again, she was sitting with Hamilton and pointing to a selection of grey, white, and black tiles all lined out in front of them.

"Now, the counters have already been ordered, as you can tell," Hamilton was saying as he pointed to the tiles. "But you have full control over the countertops. Personally, I'd go with the white quartz. They'll stand out against the dark cabinets."

Lucy hummed in thought for a moment as she looked between the quartz sample and the painted strip of wood that would be the colour of the cabinets once they were finished – they were going to be a deep, rich, not quite mahogany-colour. And Lucy had to admit the lighter countertops did seem like a good idea. She looked up to Bickslow once she saw him standing in the archway, arms crossed and intrigued by the conversation. "Bicks? What do you think?"

He took the opportunity to crouch down opposite them and he picked up the samples and held each of them up against the painted example. "I like the white, but the laminate would be a cheaper option for quartz, right?"

Hamilton nodded. "The laminate is cheaper than the quartz, correct."

"I was thinking we could go the laminate in the bathrooms though, and then spend that little bit extra in the kitchen," Lucy explained. "I mean, it'd end up costing a few thousand Jewels extra for the quartz or granite or even marble in the kitchen, but in the long run, I didn't think that was all that expensive." Of course, she could see the benefits of going for the cheaper alternative, and it wasn't like either of the choices would be needing to be replaced or repaired – at least not anytime in the near future – but from Lucy's perspective, she thought it would be better to just go for the more expensive and nicer option and just be done with it. They could afford it, she knew that – Lucy herself had been saving so much since moving in with Bickslow, and that was pretty much a first since she'd moved to Magnolia at all. And since it was going to be their home, wasn't it going to be worth it to just make it perfect as they possibly could, as soon as they could?

"Oh, well I guess so." Bickslow shrugged. "Honestly, I don't really care that much."

Lucy's face fell and Hamilton just awkward sipped at the black coffee. "What do you mean?" Lucy whispered. It was the first she'd heard that Bickslow didn't care. And she got it, she'd been more invested in the repairs on the house than he had, but… Did that mean he'd changed his mind on it? Was he regretting his decision buying it? God, Lucy really hoped that wasn't the case… "Are you not interested in it at all anymore?"

And of course, Bickslow knew exactly what his fiancée was thinking, and his eyes widened in terror as he quickly waved his hands in front of himself while trying to explain. "No, no! I am!" he assured her quickly, shrugging once. "It's just that… You know, I don't really care that much about the details. Like the counters, or the colour of the walls, or the fittings on things… I just care that you're happy. So whatever you want, that's fine. That's all I meant."

Hamilton nudged Lucy's arm with a wide grin on his face. "That one's a keeper. You better hold on to that one."

She couldn't help but giggle, partly at Hamilton, and partly at the hint of red appearing on Bickslow's cheeks as he rolled his eyes. "Oh, I'm not letting go, trust me," Lucy laughed. "But are you sure? I don't want to decide on everything myself if you'll end up not liking my decisions… It's your house, too…"

"I know that, baby." Smiling softly, Bickslow stood up just to walk around the row of tile samples to kneel down right beside her, then gentle cup her face before continuing, "And consider this me officially giving you free rein on anything and everything to do with the remodels. Well, within reason. Just, you know, don't go making everything pink or something."

"What about purple then?"

"I can deal with purple."

She craned her head to press a gentle kiss to the Seith mage's lips then shooed him away. "Excellent. Now, since you don't care what I do, you can go home to sleep, since I know how much you want to do that." It wasn't really like there was that much to do that day anyway. Lucy had only wanted to go to the house to talk about the counters, and then talk about the bathroom remodels that would be coming after the kitchen – although that much, Lucy was paying for. She just wanted Hamilton's input since she didn't want to make the house completely different to what it had been before the damage from Tartaros.

Bickslow really didn't need to be there, not unless he wanted to be.

But Bickslow couldn't help but grin. Oh, how he wanted to go home to sleep. Even he could see that there wasn't much reason for him to be there, so he was most definitely going to make the most of the opportunity just given to him. "Love you, Cosplayer."

* * *

It was decided later in the day, once Lucy returned home from the new house and Bickslow had woken up from his much needed nap, that Valentine's Day that year wasn't going to be anything special. They didn't need it to be special, and the idea of a quiet night in with take-out and pyjamas had been too good to pass up.

They stopped by the guild a little later in the afternoon, just to check in on everyone and make an appearance, but didn't stay for long, not after seeing Mira as her demon-matchmaker self once again.

Come sunset though, they packed up some bags for the night, headed over to the new house to set up a nice, warm and cosy area in the living room in front of the fireplace, with pillows and blankets to make themselves comfortable, and then quickly ducked back out into town to pick up dinner. They didn't need to go out and spend a fortune on a fancy dinner and a ridiculously overpriced wine when they could have everything they ever needed right at their fingertips at home. Not to mention that they couldn't wear their pyjamas out in public, and, well… That was a deal breaker that night.

Besides, Lucy had gone to the trouble of bribing and convincing some of the workers to reconnect the plumbing and water pipes for the evening, so she was going to make the most of it. A night in the new house would've been just a little frustrating without a working bathroom – at least one of them, anyway, since the second bathroom had yet to be stripped.

So with their pyjamas on, fireplace lit, and their greasy take-out food and wine combination (Lucy had insisted they couldn't do Valentine's Day without wine of some sort), they'd settled themselves in for the night with all of their pillows and blankets, and just enjoyed each other's company. Because that was the important part of it all anyway. For the most part, all they'd talking about was how their weeks had been – Bickslow had heard all about Lucy's week, starting with her simple (yet disastrous) job with Natsu and Happy that had ended with the mayor of Hargeon banning the Dragon Slayer and Exceed from the town for life, and ending with more house talk. And Lucy had heard all about Bickslow's adventures with his team and Laxus. She'd always enjoyed hearing about the Raijinshuu's out-of-town antics, mostly because she'd always found it fascinating to hear about how different his team were when they weren't surrounded by everyone else.

Lucy had always hoped to become close with Bickslow's team, but it had just never really happened. They'd become _closer_ , of course, but she'd always noticed how reserved they'd been around her – and anyone else for that matter. Laxus had changed the most, naturally, but Freed and Evergreen… It had been hard for Lucy _not_ to notice how they still seemed to prefer to keep her at an arm's length those days. At least most of the time, anyway.

Bickslow had always told her not to take it personally, just because they were like that with everyone, and Evergreen specifically had never really been very good at making friends or getting along with other girls. So as much as Lucy worried about whether or not Bickslow's team actually liked her, she had Bickslow assuring her that they really did. They just weren't the best at showing it – and neither was he, for that matter. But really, Bickslow knew for certain that his team loved Lucy just as much as he did – well, maybe not _quite_ as much, but they still saw her as a permanent (and welcome) part of their little family.

And even then, every time they went out on a job somewhere and settled in for the night somewhere, it didn't take very long for Evergreen to start asking about the wedding plans – or if they'd actually bothered working on them yet (which, honestly, they hadn't). And on more than one occasion, Evergreen had wondered aloud if Lucy would ask her to be a bridesmaid. Of course, Bickslow hadn't told Lucy that part yet, but he didn't really want to, either. He knew how much it would mean for Evergreen to be one of Lucy's bridesmaids (since she'd flat out refused to be a _groomswoman,_ too), but he didn't want Lucy to feel like she had to ask Evergreen to be one. That just wouldn't be fair to Evergreen. And sure, it was going to be his day, but he still sure as hell wanted his other family to be happy, too. If Evergreen was to be one of Lucy's bridesmaids, then it would have to be what Lucy wanted. No one else.

But still, planning their wedding hadn't been all that important to them over those first several weeks of the year. The house had just taken precedent, and even with the wedding date approaching, they'd really just felt like there was no rush to get everything set in stone. And it certainly helped that everyone tended to pitch in when there was a guild wedding, so they didn't need to be planning everything just yet anyway. They had time.

With their dinner eaten and wine almost gone (oh, why had they only brought one bottle?), Bickslow pulled himself up from the thick blanket on the floor, just to step over Lucy and reach the fireplace to add some more kindling to keep it crackling away. Lucy felt the warmth from the fire caress her face and she smiled into the warm glow, pulling the extra blanket up to her chin to keep herself nice and warm while her human-sized body-pillow was temporarily gone. "I'm so glad this house has a fireplace," she murmured. Naturally, it was the first time they were getting to use it since buying the house, but she was already in love with it, even if it did need some minor repairs to the stonework and the mantel needed some sanding.

Bickslow smiled over his shoulder while he continued to poke at the fire with a smaller piece. "Yeah?"

"Mm-hmm! It's so warm and toasty," Lucy sighed. "I can't wait to sit out here every night next winter, reading and drinking lots and lots of hot chocolate… You know what? I might just live out here on the lounge."

He rolled his eyes before throwing in the piece of firewood. "You're not going to live out here on the lounge," he said.

Lucy only pouted at the Seith mage as he scooted under the blanket and wrapped his arm back around her waist and propped his head up with his other hand. "How come?"

"Because we'll have a perfectly good bedroom for you to sleep in, with a warm and cosy bed and a really great husband for you to cuddle with in the morning."

"Well, I suppose you have a point…"

"Of course I have a point." He pressed a quick kiss to her forehead before shifting his arm just to tug at the blanket and add, "And stop hogging the blanket, you blanket thief. You're the one closest to the fire. I'm surprised your back isn't on fire yet." The room was warm enough, sure, but even in spring, the cold nights were hanging around. He needed at least a little bit of some kind of blanket, since Lucy's body was doing a damn good job of blocking the direct heat from the fireplace.

Lucy gasped, eyes wide yet full of mischief and a smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth as she tugged back on the throw blanket. "Rude!"

"Not rude. It's true. Now share the damn blanket, _blanket thief_."

"I am _not_ a blanket thief," Lucy insisted. Although already, with them quickly plunging into a fight for the one, queen-sized throw blanket, Lucy was having a hard time keeping a straight face. "And like you can talk anyway, considering you're the one who's usually hogging the blanket in the first place!"

"Oh, I do not!"

"You do so!"

"Do not."

"Do so."

"Blanket hog."

"Blanket _thief_."

And then they heard the rip, and they both froze, the edge of blanket held taut from where they both clutched at it in an attempt to get more of it on their side. Bickslow grinned sheepishly as he loosened his grip on the blanket, as did Lucy, then lifted his arm up just to adjust so it was equally covering the both of them. Honestly, as close as they were, chests pressed up one another and legs entwined under the blanket, there was more than enough to cover the both of them.

Lucy just happened to like having extra.

Ducking his head down just to softly press his lips to the woman's, Bickslow couldn't help but whisper one last time, "Blanket thief." And the sharp nudge to his thigh from Lucy's knee was totally worth it.

"Just be grateful I love you," Lucy mumbled once she slid down to make herself comfortable again, head tucked in against Bickslow's chest.

Bickslow could only grin up to the ceiling as he wound his arm back around her and pulled her in just that little bit closer. "Oh trust me, I am." There wasn't going to be a single day that passed where he wouldn't be grateful for her. He felt like the luckiest guy in the world with Lucy, and he doubted that would change.

* * *

 _Just a quick reminder for those that don't read my other stories, that there is an announcement up on my profile about what I'll be focusing on in the next few months (don't worry, this fic is one of my priorities, so hopefully it won't be 6+ months before I update it again. I've had the last chapters planned out for ages though... it's just matter of writing them)._

 _Also, I just wanted to quickly address a guest review that I'd honestly forgotten about until now. To the guest who said: **"** **I don't see why you should deprive your other amazingly loyal readers just because you feel your story isn't good enough for people. That's a whole load of bull."** I just want to point out that writing takes a lot of effort - and, as a writer yourself, you should know that. And putting something out there for other people to potentially judge takes a whole lot of confidence. And for the most part, that is not something I have. At the end of the day, sure, I love every single one of my readers to pieces (even you), but these are still my stories, and if I choose to stop sharing them, then that's my decision. Yes, I'll care that I'm 'depriving' my readers of the endings and everything else, but it won't be something I let bother me for the rest of my life. Because if I do ever decide to stop writing again, it's going to be for what I consider a good reason. And at the end of the day, as a writer, I don't actually owe anyone anything, especially considering how much time and effort goes into these stories, and how little the fandom generally recieves back as a whole. _

_But, still, I would think that the author's own opinion on their story is just as important as the reader's. I'm not comfortable sharing something I'm not proud of, regardless of how different the opinions between the author/reader may be. I don't see how anyone would be comfortable sharing something they're not at least mostly proud of, to be honest._

 _As always though, reviews are always appreciated._


	53. Chapter 53

_Three updates in like a week. First APS, then the one-shot collection, and now this? Wow... What is happening..._

 _Anyway. Only seven more chapters left after this! I won't lie, I'm not too fond of the way these chapters/the next few chapters are going to end up. For the most part they're filler chapters, and if you've been with me for the last two years, you'll know that I'm not very good at them. They tend to feel rushed to me, which makes it hard for me to write the chapters in the first place. Despite that though... I'm pretty excited for the next two chapters after this one. I think you'll enjoy them. For now though, I hope you enjoy this chapter (and as usual, reviews are always appreciated if you did like it)._

 _Also, if you haven't already seen it, the BixCo Week announcement is posted on my page!_

* * *

Lucy was sulking when she walked out of the bathroom and slowly padded over to the bed, and Bickslow knew exactly what the reason was. He could only sigh quietly as he lifted the blanket up for her to climb under, and as soon as she did, he was dropping it back down over her and wrapping his arms around her shoulders, pulling her into his chest.

It was that time of the month again, and while it was ordinarily a good thing, it just wasn't anymore. Not that year. And for the last now three months, every time her period came, Lucy just got progressively more and more disappointed. She'd known not to really expect anything to happen, at least not right away, but it was still disappointing to get that annoying reminder that yet another month had gone by where she still wasn't pregnant.

"It's not the end of the world," Bickslow said softly, ducking his head down just to press a gentle kiss to the top of her head. "We'll just try for next month again." He'd been saying that since the end of January. Bickslow just hoped he wouldn't have to say it for much longer.

"I know…" Lucy whispered.

But, even if she was telling herself to just try for the next month and hope for the best, she still couldn't help but start thinking again that it just wasn't going to happen. And Lucy knew that she really had no reason to think that at all, but she just couldn't help herself. She was just so worried that it was just never going to happen for her, and while that terrified her and had kept her up at night more than once, Lucy was more worried about what it would do to Bickslow.

She knew how much he wanted a baby. She knew how badly he wanted to have their own little family. And, she knew that there was more than one way to have a child, too, but… It wouldn't really be the same.

But still, Lucy wanted to be pregnant anyway – or at least she wanted to be _again_. It was just that that time, now that they were actually _trying_ to make it happen, Lucy couldn't help but think that it wouldn't happen, because the world was stupid like that, and sometimes, or at least right then while her uterus was wreaking absolute havoc and having one hell of a _tantrum_ , Lucy just thought the world was out to get her.

"It'll happen eventually," Bickslow assured her, although it was partly for his own benefit, too. "You just have to give it time."

"I don't want to give it time though," she mumbled.

"I know you don't."

Lucy sighed quietly against Bickslow's chest, keeping her head ducked and her knees tucked up against her chest. Bickslow slowly dragging his hand up and down her back was as soothing as it ever was, especially so when he rubbed gentle circles at the small of her back every so often. Sometimes she just wanted to stay in bed like that forever. It was so nice there, but they very rarely just got to spend quiet nights in with each other like that. They were each spending so much time out with their teams just to be able to afford everything for the house – the remodels that hadn't been already organises and paid for by the previous owner were coming in with a higher price tag than anticipated, but that was still okay – and get it as perfect as it could be. And half of the time, whenever they did spend time with each other after getting back from a mission, or just the guild or even errands for the day, all they wanted to do was sleep and nothing else. No cuddling, no quiet conversations about anything and everything. Just sleep.

And when Lucy thought about it that way, it was really no surprise that she wasn't pregnant yet. They made time for each other pretty much whenever they could, but for the most part, they'd never really gone out of their way to actually be with each other. If one or both or them hadn't felt like it, then they just didn't try. Sex just wasn't fun if it felt like a chore. But still, even if they had agreed to try and get pregnant after the new year, nothing had really changed. So far, they hadn't really gone out of their way to try and make it happen. Or at least, they hadn't been trying as much as they _could_.

Lucy knew that there were better times than others to actually try. But she hadn't really paid much attention to that. Not that year, at least. She'd kept it in her head when they'd been together the first time, before they'd broken up, because at that point, she really hadn't wanted a baby all that much. The most they'd done to actually stop that was to just avoid having sex altogether for a few days every now and then… Or, well… Bickslow had just pulled out instead, although Lucy knew _that_ wasn't really that great of an alternative. That, and it just been messy, and Lucy really didn't like messy all that much.

Still though, that time around, where they were actually trying to get pregnant and have a baby, they weren't really doing anything extra to make it happen. They were just… doing what they usually did. Which, for the most part, was just sleeping together as they usually did without really paying much mind as to what could happen.

But as Lucy was realising, that just wasn't good enough. She wasn't going to get knocked up if they kept doing that. Or if she did, it was going to take a hell of a long time. And frankly, Lucy just didn't have the patience for that. She wanted it all to just hurry up, and she knew she had a better chance of actually getting pregnant if they actually tried and made sure to do everything at the right time.

She lifted her head then just so she could look up to Bickslow still resting his own head on the pillow and continuing to smooth his hand over her back. "I want to try harder," she whispered.

He peeked his eyes open. "Hm?"

"I want to try harder," Lucy repeated. "To get pregnant, I mean."

Well, he'd assumed that much. But Bickslow wasn't quite sure how they were supposed to do that. He'd already kind of assumed that they were trying. "Okay? But I thought that's what we were already doing."

"We are, but… We're not really doing anything different."

"Well, last I checked I wasn't cumming on your stomach anymore," Bickslow mumbled. He thought that was a pretty good sign that they were trying.

Lucy only sighed through her nose, rolling her eyes a little for good measure. "Yes, well, there's _that_ ," she said, "but that's not what I was talking about."

Bickslow chuckled quietly. "Then tell me what you're talking about."

"I just mean that… We're not trying as much as we _could_ be." She watched Bickslow for any kind of reaction, but seeing none, she continued, "I know that we said we'd try after the new year, but nothing has really changed. We're just… We're just sleeping together as we usually do."

"So… What then?"

Lucy shrugged. "I just want to try harder," she said. "You know, by… By making sure that we try at the right time so we have a better chance of actually conceiving. We don't really have anything to lose…" She had nothing to lose to begin with, so really, as far as Lucy was concerned, all they could do was try that little bit harder to make it happen.

But if that was what Lucy wanted, and if that was what it would take to actually have a baby, then they'd do it. For the most part, Bickslow didn't really what they did, as long as they got there. And really, the sooner the better. He didn't care that their wedding was just five months away, almost do the day. Actually marrying Lucy wasn't anywhere near as important to him as getting her pregnant. Sure, he'd still love to do it, because he loved the idea of being able to wake up next to her every morning (or _most_ of them) for the rest of his life and know that she was his wife. But it would just be that much nicer if they had a kid. And getting that kid was far more important to them than getting married.

Admittedly though, Bickslow wasn't too sure what the whole _'right time'_ thing meant. Not entirely, at least. He certainly had his assumptions though. For the most part though, Bickslow just thought it was best to let Lucy deal with anything to do with _bleeding_ and _cycles_ and anything else even slightly related to it. It was her body, after all. It was safer that way.

After a moment, Bickslow gave a small nod and smiled, saying softly, "If that's what you want to do, then that's what we do." Lucy was right though. They really did have nothing to lose.

Lucy returned the smile as she tilted her head up just to press a gentle kiss to Bickslow's lips, quickly curling back in on herself with the top of her head just barely peeking above the edge of the blanket. She knew it would still take time, even when they were trying to make it happen with everything they had, but at least Lucy would know that they were trying.

And if it still didn't happen then… Well, Lucy was going to try her best not to think about that at all. She had to be optimistic. She had to try her best to stay positive, no matter how hard it was.

For the time being though, she was just going to try and convince Bickslow to let her sleep right where she was. Because she was comfortable and warm.

* * *

Levy stepped back from the now almost completely lavender wall just to gently place the paint roller back in the tray, and then carefully sit herself down on the floor. The floor was so far away, and she knew she was going to have a hell of a lot of trouble getting back up, but there was no furniture in the nursery yet, and Levy just really, really needed a break for a few minutes.

She was certain Lucy could handle the few patches left on the wall, though.

Levy reached for her bottle of water on the ground beside her to take a large gulp, asking first, "So have you started planning the wedding yet?"

"Um… A little bit," Lucy hummed in answer. "We decided—well, _I_ decided on a colour scheme a few weeks ago." Somewhere around the time that she'd started taking the whole 'trying to get pregnant' thing a little more seriously, she'd started thinking about the wedding again. For the most part, Lucy had just been leaving it. They'd been putting most of their time and energy into trying to conceive, but now that they were really just focusing on those few days in the middle of each cycle, Lucy found she had a lot of time to do everything else. So, between jobs, she'd started planning her wedding.

After all, at that point, it was really only another three-and-a-half months away. She still needed to get a wedding dress, too. Although on the off chance she did miraculously get pregnant before August 25th, she was mostly just trying to put off getting a wedding dress made for as long as possible.

"What colour scheme did you decide on then?" Levy asked.

"Purple, blue, and gold," Lucy said with a smile. "Or maybe silver instead of gold. They're basically the same anyway." Although the purple and the blue were really just for the bridesmaid dresses and her bouquet, and Lucy had long since decided on having a purple and white calla lily bouquet.

Levy sighed wistfully, "That sounds so beautiful. I wish I could get married. Gajeel doesn't want to."

"You're already having a baby!" Lucy laughed.

"I know… But a wedding would just be so nice. Then again, I'm pretty sure Gajeel would want everything to be black or grey and that doesn't sound so appealing…"

"Hey, black weddings can be classy, you know. Especially black and white." Bickslow had even tried to make her consider having a black and white wedding when they'd first started talking about it, but he'd quickly caved and agreed to the purple and blue.

Although then again, he had also said that he really didn't care all that much about the colours of everything anyway. He only cared about being able to stand up there and marry her. That, and he was more inclined to just let Lucy take care of everything just so she could make it the wedding she really wanted. It was just better that way.

"I suppose so…" Levy mumbled, taking another drink from her water bottle. "But what about bridesmaids?" she asked then. "Have you chosen them?"

Lucy nodded. "I have, actually." She'd been thinking about that the most, because she knew that it was going to mean a lot to whoever she did ask to be a bridesmaid. She also knew that she was going to offend some others by not asking them, and Lucy had wanted to avoid that as much as possible. Still, she'd managed to narrow it down to four wonderful women, including the maid of honour. Now all Lucy had to do was actually ask them.

Levy could only grimace then. She'd been waiting to talk to Lucy about that, but she knew her friend had had other things on her mind over the last few months so bridesmaids and wedding planning hadn't really been a priority. Now that Lucy was actually starting to plan and choose everything, Levy could talk to her about it. "Well… I know that you're going to ask me to be your maid of honour," she began, leaning back on one hand while her other rubbed tiny circles on the side of her large bump. Lucy could only glance back to her with a blush forming on her cheeks. "But… I'm going to save you the trouble of asking by saying no to it now. I'll have the baby by then and I'll just… I'll be so exhausted and I wouldn't want to ruin your day because I'm busy."

Honestly though, Levy would love to be Lucy's maid of honour. She was her best friend and her getting married just made her so happy. But… Her daughter was also supposed to be due in the first week of August, and even if the wedding wasn't until the end, Levy just didn't think she'd be up to really doing anything while she had a newborn to look after.

Lucy couldn't help but feel guilty after that though. She could understand why Levy would assume that she'd be asked to be the maid of honour, but… Honestly, Lucy hadn't been planning on asking her to be. A bridesmaid, yes, but not the maid of honour. And as she rolled the brush in the tray of lavender paint again, Lucy almost wished she didn't have to quietly admit, "Well, uh… I wasn't actually going to ask you to be my maid of honour…"

"Wait… You weren't?" Levy stammered, and Lucy shook her head. She wasn't used to making a fool of herself like that. "I just… I just assumed, you know, because I'm your best friend, and…" She groaned into her hands, shaking her head slightly. "I'm so sorry, Lu."

Lucy left the now finished wall behind to crouch down in front of her friend. "No, no. I should be apologising," she said softly. Levy was right to assume that she would've been chosen just because she was her best friend. She'd only ever considered two people to be her maid of honour, and it had honestly been a hard decision for her to make. But, Lucy was happy with the decision she'd made, even if it was kind of upsetting her best friend in the process. "I was going to ask you to be a bridesmaid, though. I'm guessing you're going to say no to that as well though, right?"

Levy finally looked up and shrugged slightly, a small smile on her lips when she looked back to her friend. A bridesmaid… Well, that would be less stressful, but… "I'd really love to, Lu, but yes, I'm still going to say no," she said softly. Even if she'd have less to worry about, it would still be a lot of work and she just really wouldn't have the energy for that.

Lucy nodded and sighed quietly. "Well, I would've loved to have you up there with me, but I get it," she said, collapsing down onto the ground beside Levy to take a drink from her own water bottle.

It was good Lucy understood. Levy hadn't wanted to say no, but she could also tell that Lucy hadn't really wanted to upset her by not asking her to be her maid of honour, either. But honestly though, Levy wasn't really that upset. It would've been nice, but… It wasn't her day. It was Lucy's day (and Bickslow's, by extension), after all, and Lucy should get to choose who she wanted to be part of her wedding party without having to feel guilty for her choices.

But… Even if Levy could see that, she was curious who Lucy had chosen to be her maid of honour. "Just out of curiosity though…" she began then, with Lucy glancing in her direction as she took her own break now that the room was completely painted. "Who are you going to ask to be your maid of honour? Is it Erza?"

"Oh. Uh… No, not Erza."

"One of Bickslow's sisters then?"

Lucy shook her head. "Nope." She had considered it for a moment though. She'd even considered asking them to be bridesmaids, but… Well, they hadn't made the cut, as much as Lucy had wished they could. She also wished she could like ten bridesmaids, too, but she couldn't.

"Mira?" Levy asked after a moment. "Or maybe Cana?"

"No and no."

Well, Levy had run out of ideas. She really had no idea who Lucy was going to ask. And shrugging slightly, she only mumbled, "Well, I'm out of ideas. Who are you going to ask then?" She was almost willing to _beg_ Lucy to tell her, she was that curious.

But begging wouldn't be required. Because Lucy was all too willing to answer with, "I was planning on asking Evergreen."

Lucy had known she wanted Evergreen to be part of her wedding party from the minute she'd actually started planning it. Evergreen was like family to Bickslow, and with Lucy marrying into that family, she really just wanted Evergreen to know that _she_ was going to consider her as family, too. She already did in a way. The only problem was that Lucy just hadn't really been able to show her that, because Evergreen had always been so distant or so quiet whenever Lucy had been near her. She understood that, though. She knew Evergreen wasn't so great with talking to people sometimes, so she'd never tried to make her uncomfortable.

But… When it came to her wedding, Lucy just really wanted Evergreen to be a part of it. And when she'd told Bickslow that she was planning on asking Evergreen to be her maid of honour, just a little over a week earlier, he'd only looked at her, asked her if she was serious, then just about squeezed all of the air out of her he'd been hugging her that tightly while telling her that he thought she was making a really great choice.

He still hadn't told her that Evergreen had been hoping to be at least a bridesmaid, and he probably wasn't going to.

Still, when she'd thought about Evergreen being her maid of honour, Lucy just thought that it felt right. It wasn't entirely logical, just because they weren't really close and for the most part, Lucy didn't know all that much about her. But it still felt right. Lucy felt like Evergreen would be able to handle it. And Bickslow telling her that he thought it was a good choice really just made her all the more certain that it was.

It took Levy a moment to actually process that, though. She couldn't tell if the reason she'd been so surprising to hear it was because she'd been expecting to be asked, or if it was because Levy just really hadn't thought Lucy to be that close to Evergreen. Although once Levy thought about it some more, and once she remembered what the maid of honour was supposed to do… Well, she had to admit it kind of made sense.

She was actually kind of perfect for it. If anyone was going to be able to help Lucy get everything planned perfectly, while also (mostly) keeping her calm, well… It would be Evergreen.

"You know what?" Levy murmured. "She actually makes sense."

"You think so?" Lucy asked.

She nodded. "Sure do!"

That was relieving to hear for the most part, and Lucy couldn't help but let out a little sigh of relief. "You're not too upset with me, are you? I mean, I know you said no anyway, but…"

Levy smiled at her friend, and shuffled over to wrap her arm around Lucy's shoulders to quickly give her half a hug, resting her head on Lucy's shoulder for a moment. "Lu, I'm fine," she said with a kind smile. "It's your day anyway. You should be able to choose who you want without having to worry about anyone else's feelings. And anyone else who _does_ think they get a say in any of it… Well, they're probably not the kind of people you should want to have involved anyway."

"I don't know what I'd do without you, Levy," Lucy sighed. The woman really was a godsend sometimes. Plus, she was almost always right, so that was pretty great.

"You'd probably be doing exactly what you're doing anyway," Levy giggled. "But anyway… How's the _other_ thing going? Still no luck?"

Lucy sighed again and shook her head. "Not yet. Still aiming for next month, as usual," she mumbled. She'd told Levy that they were trying to have a baby, but only because Levy was her best friend and she told the woman everything. Pretty much no one else knew, other than Bickslow's family in Crocus. Even then, Lucy didn't think it was appropriate to tell other people, other than her best friend and her family, of course. It was as personal as it got.

"It'll happen eventually. Don't stress."

"I know," Lucy whispered. "I'm just getting impatient, that's all." She was still trying to be optimistic, though. She knew it wasn't going to happen right away.

Unfortunately for Levy, she didn't really know what else she could say to Lucy about that. She didn't think there _was_ anything else to say, either. So instead, she only set her bottle of water back down on the ground, a little bit out of the way, and said with a sigh, "Well, I need to get out of here before the fumes give me a headache, so how about you help me get up?"

* * *

"You… You want me to be your maid of honour?"

Lucy nodded. "Yep!"

"Actually… _me_?"

"Well, last I checked, I only know _one_ Evergreen," she laughed. "So yes, of course I mean you!"

Evergreen was _almost_ at a loss for words. When Lucy had asked her over the lunch that day, she certainly hadn't expected to be having _that_ conversation with her. And admittedly, Evergreen really had been hoping that Lucy would ask her to be a bridesmaid, but she hadn't expected it to happen just because she knew that they weren't even really _friends_. They were more like… _half_ friends.

Still, for Lucy to actually ask her to not just be a bridesmaid, but to be her maid of honour? Yeah, Evergreen was definitely a little speechless.

But… Evergreen couldn't help but think that it was just because Lucy had no one else to ask. Surely Lucy wouldn't have even considered her unless everyone else had said no. And Evergreen was sure Lucy meant well… But… It wouldn't be the same if that was the case. She didn't really want to be the last choice, but she could understand if that's what she really was.

"Why me, though?" she whispered, hanging her head slightly.

Lucy noticed the shift, too. She'd thought Evergreen would be excited, not… sad. "Well, because I trust you, and… And you're practically like a sister to me already because of Bicks, and… Well, because I think you'd be perfect for it and I wanted you up there with me," she answered. Although if Evergreen said no, then Lucy would be zero-for-two as far as her bridesmaid-asking goes, assuming she counted Levy. And if Evergreen said no… Well, Lucy really didn't know what she'd do.

"Do you mean that?" Evergreen asked softly, looking back up again. She knew that Lucy didn't lie by nature, but… She just wasn't sure yet.

"Ever, of course I mean it. I wouldn't have asked you otherwise."

"So… So you're not asking because you have no one else to ask?"

"What? Of course not!" Lucy wasn't even sure where that was coming from. "You're the first and _only_ person I planned on asking, by the way," she said. Levy only _half_ counted, since she'd technically said no before she could even ask. But, Lucy still hadn't planned on asking Levy to be her maid of honour. She'd only ever planned on asking Evergreen.

But, once the words left Lucy's mouth, she barely had a chance to react before Evergreen was quickly leaning forward and throwing her arms around her. Lucy thought Erza's hugs were strong, and then Bickslow's when he was ridiculously happy, but Evergreen was giving both of them a run for their money.

"I'd _love_ to be your maid of honour!" Evergreen squealed, squeezing Lucy tightly. Oh, she was just so excited. Saying yes was no problem when she was sure that she wasn't just a last resort, and Evergreen believed Lucy when she said that she wasn't. Granted, she still wasn't entirely sure why Lucy thought she'd be so perfect for the job, but she was really just honoured to have even been _considered_ , let alone actually be asked. "I won't let you down, Lucy. I promise you that."

She didn't think Evergreen could let her down anyway.

* * *

Lucy walked determinedly ahead of her team on the way back to the guild. They'd been gone for the last week. And ordinarily, being gone for a week wasn't a problem, but when she'd only agreed to going with her team because she'd been under the assumption that she'd only be gone for a few days… Well, that was when it became a problem.

Especially when being out of town meant she'd already missed _two_ of the days where she supposedly had a better chance of conceiving. She really only had that one day left, and Lucy just wasn't willing to waste any more time than she already had quite literally cleaning up after her team's mess.

She knew Bickslow would be in the guild though. The house was done for the most part – only their bedroom needed to be painted and the bookshelves in the living room needed to be assembled and attached to the walls – but it was still getting late in the day, which meant Bickslow would no doubt be sick of either painting or packing up the apartment, so he'd be drinking at the guild.

She mostly just ignored her team behind her telling her to slow down. Aside from really not wanting to deal with them after all they'd done was argue for the last six days straight, Lucy really did have better places to be.

Once Lucy did reach the guild, it didn't take her very long to spot Bickslow sitting with Levy and Gajeel. The bright blue hair made it so easy to spot him, and Lucy really did love that he didn't wear his visor around the guild anymore. She weaved her way through the tables to head straight for where he fiancé was sitting, and smiled at him when Bickslow looked in her direction.

"Cosplayer! I was wondering when you'd be getting back," Bickslow said with a grin.

Lucy ducked down just to press a quick kiss to his lips before reaching for his hand. "Yeah, well… Things came up." She could tell him about her chaotic job later. For the time being, she had plans that involved him. Or, well, a part of him, at least. Her team had caught up to her by then and all but collapsed into the empty seats around the same table, already complaining about Lucy walking so fast again. Lucy could only roll her eyes. "Anyway, we gotta go."

"What? Why?" Bickslow asked. "Come on, come sit. I just ordered food from Mira. Stay a little."

"Nope, we have somewhere else to be." She tried pulling on his hand, but he was a heavy son of a bitch so she really ended up just lifting his arm. "Bicks, come on. We really need to go. Like, right now." Lucy was trying so hard to be as vague as possible, because the last thing Lucy wanted to do was make it obvious to everyone else (or, just her team, really) that she was really just trying to get home as quickly as possible so she could have sex.

Except the vagueness was still going over Bickslow's head, and he tried pulling her down to the empty seat next to him, rolling his eyes as he did so. "Lucy, come on," he whined. "Just for a little while. You just got back. Relax for a little bit."

Lucy rolled her eyes then. "Bickslow, I really mean it," she said softly. Her team were all giving her odd looks. Only Levy seemed to be disinterested, too busy resting quietly with her head on Gajeel's shoulder. Lucy doubted she was actually asleep though. No one could sleep in the guild. But, glancing back to Bickslow, Lucy was sure she felt a little warmth creep up on her cheeks as she quietly added, "It's… _You know_ … Time."

"…Oh!" Now Bickslow understood why Lucy was being so vague. She wasn't exactly going shout out in the middle of the guild that she was ovulating. Oh no. Bickslow didn't exactly want her too, either. "Oh, well, uh… Right, yes, okay. Totally gotta go then," he said quickly with a nod mostly to himself.

The rest of Team Natsu only watched on in confusion as Bickslow quickly got up from his chair and let Lucy mostly drag him out of the guild. They shared looks with each other, confirming that each of them really had no idea what had just transpired, or what _time_ it supposedly was.

"So was that just me, or was that really weird?" Gray mumbled, with Natsu and Erza nodding in agreement. It had been more towards Gajeel and Levy, who still didn't seem that fazed by any of it.

"It wasn't that weird," Levy murmured, her head still on Gajeel's shoulder. Honestly, she'd thought it was obvious. But it certainly helped she already knew why Lucy would've been acting that way.

"Why not?" Erza asked. "Do you know where they're going so quickly then?"

"Mm-hmm. Home, no doubt."

"Why would they be in such a rush to go home? That makes no sense," Natsu mused. "We walked past their place on our way here."

Levy let out a sigh as she sat up, lifting her hand to rub at her tired eyes as she opened them. "Because Lu's trying to get pregnant and she can't do that on her own, dummies," she mumbled.

"She's… She's trying to get pregnant? Really?" Erza whispered. She hadn't been expecting that in the slightest, and judging by Natsu's and Gray's silence on either side of her, she knew they hadn't been expecting it either. If Levy was right, Erza didn't really know what to think, though. She thought Lucy would've told them about something like that. It was a big thing, and they were her friends. "I at least thought they would wait until they were married before they started their family…"

"Why? It's not like she was married the first time she was."

"First time she was what?"

Levy rolled her eyes. "First time she was—" But she stopped herself promptly when she realised what she'd been about to say, and then everything else she'd _already_ said. "Oh no," she whispered. Her face quickly went beet red and she didn't need to look up to know that Gajeel was no doubt staring at her like she'd grown a second head. Gajeel still knew just as much as she did, but Gajeel also hadn't been the one to just blurt out someone else's business.

Levy still knew she'd fucked up though. She hadn't really meant to say what she had… She just hadn't been thinking. She'd barely been sleeping over the last few weeks, and she was just exhausted. Lucy was going to be so disappointed with her… But Levy didn't even have the time to worry about Lucy herself, not when the rest of Team Natsu were closing in on her, clearly wanting her to explain just what the fuck she'd blurted out.

* * *

Lucy was just taping up a cardboard box for the move when there was a knock on the door, and she set the roll of tape down to go answer it. Her team were awkwardly awaiting just on the other side, and Lucy instantly stepped back to let them all in. "Oh, I wasn't expecting any of you to drop by," she said, laughing quietly to herself. When they all just waited outside, still looking as awkward and uncomfortable as ever, Lucy arched an eyebrow at them, asking, "Are you going to come in? Or are you going to stay out in the hall?"

"Well, uh… Are you, um… _busy_?" Erza asked. After getting the rest of the story out of Levy in the guild earlier, Erza's first thought had actually been to just rush over to Lucy's straight away. It had been Gray's, too. But then Natsu had grabbed both of their arms and pointed out that if they really were trying to have a baby, then they should probably wait a little while. It had been a few hours since then, so Erza was fairly confident that Lucy wouldn't be busy, but the last thing she wanted to do was intrude or ruin anything.

Lucy shrugged. "Nope, not busy," she answered. "I'm just packing up some things while Bicks is picking up dinner."

Erza breathed a sigh of relief. She was the first to finally enter the apartment, with Natsu and Gray following behind her.

"So, any reason in particular you all stopped by?" Lucy asked as she closed the door and then returned to the box to finish taping it shut. "Or were you just stopping by for the sake of it?" She really didn't mind either way, though. She was just curious.

"Well, um…" Erza wasn't very often nervous, but she was right then. And since the boys had already made it clear on the way over there that they didn't really want to be the ones to bring anything up, it left Erza to do the job. But it was difficult, because by not telling them about any of it in the first place, Lucy had made it clear that she hadn't wanted them to know about anything – not her miscarrying before, and not her trying to get pregnant again. But they still knew about it anyway, because of what Levy had told them, and even if it had been an accident, none of them could just forget about it or pretend that they didn't know about any of it. They just couldn't.

So that left talking to Lucy about it. And for once in her life, Erza was actually trying really hard to be mindful of her words.

"The thing is…" Erza mumbled. She kept looking down at her hands as she tapped her fingertips together. "Uh… When you left the guild earlier… With Bickslow…" Lucy picked up the roll of tape and then a flattened cardboard box to carry it down the hall and to the bedroom, careful to keep listening to Erza's slow words as she followed Lucy down the hall as well. "Levy, um… Told us some things…" Erza finished quietly.

Lucy stopped in her tracks, right inside the bedroom with her back still to her team following her. "Oh…" she whispered. There was really only one thing that Lucy could think of that would warrant her team showing up like that, but for the life of her, Lucy just couldn't figure out why Levy would've told them.

They were all almost too scared to step past the threshold into Lucy's room. Natsu and Gray only peeked nervously around Erza as she took but a single step forward. She'd seen how Lucy's shoulders had dropped when she'd said it, and as she watched Lucy slowly move again just to sit down on the edge of the made bed, Erza's first instinct was to just run over her and squish her in a big hug. But she was stopping herself from doing that, just because she didn't know what was going through Lucy's head right then.

"I don't believe Levy meant to tell us, though," Erza said softly.

Lucy shook her head. "It's fine," she mumbled. She was disappointed, and just a little hurt, and definitely confused, but it wasn't really the end of the world. Still, it was almost as if every time she started moving on from losing the baby and actually getting over it to an extent, someone would go and bring it up again. And that stung.

Granted, it wasn't as bad anymore. But it still kind of hurt.

Hesitantly, they all finally moved into the room and piled onto the bed around Lucy – Erza next to Lucy, Natsu on Lucy's other side, and Gray next to Erza. Lucy let out a quiet sigh when Erza spoke again softly, "So I imagine it's true then. You were pregnant before." And Erza had believed Levy, but… She kind of wanted to hear it from Lucy herself.

Lucy shrugged. There wasn't really any point in trying to deny it, especially when she didn't know how _much_ Levy had told them. "Yeah…"

"You could've told us, Luce," Natsu mumbled.

"I know… But I just… I couldn't."

"Why not?" Gray asked.

"Well… Because… Because everything with Tartaros had just happened…" Lucy mumbled, still looking down to her hands in her lap. "And you guys were all busy with things. And I just… I didn't _want_ to tell any of you." It had been her thing to deal with, and the only reason she'd told the people she did was because she really hadn't had a choice in it. And even then, that had mostly been Wendy's doing but Lucy didn't blame her for that.

But even if she hadn't wanted to tell any of them, she just still hadn't been able to anyway. She hadn't been able to face anyone back then. She'd needed time to herself to actually be alone.

"But we're your team," Erza whispered. "You should know that you can come to any of us for anything, no matter what else is going on."

"I do know that…"

"But you still didn't tell us."

Lucy shrugged again. "Like I said, I just didn't want to tell any of you. I didn't want to tell _anyone_." She didn't really understand why people had such a hard time understanding it. She'd never had any obligation to tell anyone about it. "But if it makes you feel any better, I didn't tell Bicks either."

"Seriously?" Gray wondered.

"Seriously," Lucy sighed. "I only told Wendy because she was here. And Wendy told Laxus and Gajeel. That's it. The only reason Levy knew was because I brought it up in a letter when I was in Crocus. And Bicks… I didn't tell him about it until the guild was already being rebuilt." At that point, Lucy was almost inclined to believe she'd told less people herself than what everyone else had. Wendy made two, and then Levy made three more.

But Lucy herself? Lucy had really only told four people. And that one number difference kind of stung.

But, hearing that Lucy hadn't really told anyone about her miscarrying did seem to put everyone's minds at ease. It was horrible, but at least they hadn't been the only ones to not know about it.

Still though… They really did wish Lucy had told them. Erza at least could partly understand why Lucy wouldn't have wanted to tell people, but not really. They were a team. They were supposed to be there for each other for anything. And she got it – Lucy was getting married and wanting to start her own family and get on with her own life. But that didn't mean she had to forget her other family.

After a moment, Lucy seemed to find three sets of arms around her, all squeezing her tightly and pulling (or pushing, in Gray's case) her back to the middle of the bed. She'd never really figured out how their attack hugs could be so in sync. Still, only squealing at first, Lucy quickly stopped, just because she had to admit that being smothered by her team was always a good way to end a night.

"We're sorry you had to go through it alone, Lucy," Gray said softly.

Erza nodded against Lucy's shoulder. "We're a team," she said. "That means you never have to do anything alone."

Lucy was almost sure she felt tears prick at her eyes. She knew that they were right. She'd known it all along. But… Part of her might have forgotten it. Still, they were the people she was supposed to be able to go to when she couldn't go to anyone else. She probably _should've_ told them in the beginning, or at least at some point. But, even knowing that, she didn't regret not telling them. The only person she'd ever regret not telling sooner was Bickslow, but they'd both moved past that.

"I love you guys so much," Lucy said with a sniffle. "I really do." Her team only squeezed her tighter, but Lucy didn't mind.

"You know we're always gonna be here for you, Luce," Natsu said, and Lucy glanced back to him just to see his infectious grin. "Even when you can't take jobs with us anymore because you'll have a kid."

"W-What? Why would you say that?! What do you mean?!"

"Well, Levy said you and Bickslow are trying to have a child…" Erza mumbled. "It wouldn't be wise for you to take so many jobs afterwards. At least not when you're expecting."

Lucy instantly felt herself blush, and she managed to pull her arms free just to hide her face in her hands. "Is there anything Levy _hasn't_ told you?" she wailed. _Maybe I shouldn't tell Levy so much…_ "God, that's embarrassing…" She'd been trying so hard to avoid that. And then it had all gone and been ruined anyway.

"Why is it embarrassing?" Natsu asked.

She spread her fingers over her eyes to peek at the pink-haired Dragon Slayer resting on her shoulder. Was Natsu really asking that question? Of course he was. "W-Well, because… Because it's _private,_ and… And well, it involves… _You know_ … And… And I didn't want to tell you guys because it's embarrassing!"

Natsu shrugged. "I don't get it," he mumbled. "Igneel always said it was natural – sex and babies and all that. None of us would exist otherwise. I don't think that's anything to be embarrassed about. Besides, you'd make a great mother!"

Lucy wasn't the only one staring at Natsu in shock right then. Gray was almost convinced he was dreaming, and Erza just wondered if she'd actually heard the words to come out of his mouth. But Lucy was the only one that was beginning to cry again. He had truth to his words. But the last part he'd said… "Do you really think that?" she whispered.

"That'd you be a good mother? 'Course!" Natsu grinned again. "You're Lucy, after all. You're good at everything you do."

Lucy managed to pull herself free from where Erza and Gray were still squishing her just to throw her arms around Natsu, squeezing all the air out of someone else for a change.


	54. Chapter 54

With Lucy expecting to be gone for the next week, Bickslow had been tasked with packing up the apartment and doing his best to get some of their boxes over to the new place. It was mostly ready by that point, with all the new flooring in and the walls painted the perfect shades that Lucy had chosen. All of the shelves in the lounge room and the kitchen and dining room had been put up, and now all they had left to do was to actually move in.

With the morning mostly gone, Bickslow decided to finally pull himself out of bed and get ready for another arduous day of packing up everything. The books had been packed up weeks earlier, so Bickslow decided he'd just start packing all the odd trinkets and random pieces of junk they had lying around the apartment.

He was already onto his second box when he came across a stack of papers in Lucy's desk drawer (which, under normal circumstances he didn't go near, but Lucy had told him she didn't care what he went through when he was packing). He rifled through the papers just out of curiosity, and it only took Bickslow a few seconds to realise what Lucy had sketched on each sheet.

Each sheet was for a room in the house. There was one for the lounge room, another for the area off to the side that Lucy was adopting as her study, one for their bedroom, and even what appeared to be a room for the baby they'd yet to even conceive. And, admittedly, Lucy was probably the worst artist on the planet, but she was good enough for Bickslow to be able to tell what she'd been trying to do.

She'd been picturing how she wanted to decorate the new house, complete with little arrows and notes with ideas she'd jotted down afterwards. According to one note with six exclamation points, they desperately needed a row of succulents to sit on the windowsill in the kitchen. Bickslow honestly had no idea what the fuck succulents even were, and while he could tell what was supposed to be a lounge and a rug and a table, he could definitely not tell what the little green and yellow and pink dots on the windowsill were supposed to be.

Still, finding Lucy's sketches did give Bickslow an idea. It was probably a horrible idea and he doubted he'd be able to pull it off, but he could sure try. If he enlisted the help of his team, getting everything out of the apartment and into the new house would be a piece of cake.

Maybe.

Really, it wasn't like Bickslow was known for having the best ideas, but that was fine. Mostly.

Setting the pages down back in Lucy's desk drawer, Bickslow went to quickly get out of his pyjamas and into some more acceptable clothing, and brushed his teeth too before he locked up the apartment to head to the guild. Laxus was already in the guild, playing with his son at a table while Mira staffed the bar as usual.

Laxus looked up from his eleven-month-old playing with the empty wooden mugs and to Bickslow coming towards him. "Morning."

Bickslow made sure to quickly wave to Jax and let the babies go twirl around him before setting his attention to Laxus. "You busy?" he asked.

"Uh… Just a little," Laxus scoffed. He had his son to keep occupied that day. "Why?"

"I need some help with something. But, don't worry. I'll see if—"

"What do you need help with?" Laxus asked. If it was something simple, he could probably help Bickslow and just take Jax with him. Otherwise, he could probably just convince Lisanna to babysit him again. She always liked babysitting the kid.

"I want to try and get moved into the house before Lucy comes back," Bickslow answered. It wasn't going to be easy. Getting the furniture out of the apartment and over to the house was going to be the biggest problem, but that was really the part he needed the help with the most anyway. Once the furniture was out of his apartment, he could just put the babies' souls into them and move them across town that way, but he couldn't do that until he'd gotten the furniture out by hand. He needed manpower for that.

Laxus glanced down to his son still playing with the mugs and now Bickslow's babies. "I can probably get Lis to watch Jax for a few hours without Mira getting mad at me…" He didn't think Mira would mind if he told her it was to help Bickslow move. Even then, it had been six months since Bickslow had bought the house. It was about time he moved into the damn thing.

"Are you sure?"

"Why not?"

Bickslow nodded. _One down, two to go. "_ Well, I still want to find Ever and Freed to help too. Do you know where they are?"

"Haven't seen them all morning. Want me to check Freed's apartment on my way over to yours? I've still gotta go convince Lis to watch Jax."

"Yeah, that works." Bickslow got up from the bench as Laxus crouched down to pick Jax up off the floor. "I'll go see if I can find Ever then." She was no doubt at Fairy Hills, so Bickslow didn't think he'd have a hard time finding her.

* * *

Once everyone had arrived, Freed had suggested they continue packing up the rest of the smaller items in Bickslow's apartment and get those over to the house first, just so they'd have more room to manoeuvre the larger items of furniture. The dining chairs, table, barstools, and some other boxes Bickslow had already packed had been flown over to the house with the babies already as well, just because they'd been small and relatively easy to get out.

Freed had decided to start packing up the kitchen with the help of Laxus, and Evergreen had offered to do the bathroom, so Bickslow got a start on the dresser and the wardrobe.

"So… How's the wedding planning going?" Bickslow asked, pulling out the top drawer of his bedside table just to tip the contents out onto the bed before pulling out the second drawer. Sure, it felt weird to be asking how the planning for his own goddamn wedding was going, but he didn't really talk to Lucy about it much. He'd given her free rein to do what she wanted.

"I think it's going well," Evergreen replied.

"Yeah?"

"Mm-hmm! Lucy _finally_ has an appointment next Thursday to choose her dress. I've been trying to get her to go to a boutique since she asked me to be her maid of honour, but she just kept putting it off!"

Bickslow continued to slowly sort through the piles of rubbish sitting in the middle of his bed, grimacing when he came across a pile of condoms that had been sitting at the bottom of one drawer. _Like those are any good now_. Naturally though, Bickslow knew why Lucy had put off choosing her dress, but he couldn't exactly tell Evergreen that. "I just don't think she cared much about the dress at all, to be honest…" he mumbled. So it was a lie, but that was fine.

"But she has to care! It's her wedding day! She has to look her best!" Evergreen insisted.

"She could wear her pyjamas for all I care, and she'd still look great."

"And that's why she put it off for so long." Evergreen shook her head as she finished folding up the shower curtain. "She'll be lucky if she's able to get a dress made and fitted at this rate. She should've chosen all of this _months_ ago."

"Well, we've had a few more important things on our minds. Cut her some slack."

"Like what?"

"Uh… Just things." Bickslow made a point of walking out of Evergreen's line of sight from where she stood in the bathroom. He'd already said too much. Way too much. Bickslow would be considering himself lucky if Evergreen hadn't already figured out what he'd been talking about. She was smarter than she looked. "Anyway. What else has Lucy decided on?" he asked then, clearing his throat forcefully as he returned to his bed to finish stacking everything in either the box, or the large bag behind him that was going straight in a bin.

Evergreen decided not to question what Bickslow had meant, only letting out a small sigh as she continued on with her own task. "Well, Mira asked if Lucy wanted a specific menu for the day, just so she'd have time to order everything she needed," she said, taking all of Lucy's perfumes and placing them neatly in the box with the old towel. "But I think for the most part Lucy is just going to leave it as the usual guild menu, just to keep everyone else happy."

"Whatever works."

"Oh! She booked a florist last week, though."

"She still having the calla lilies?" Bickslow asked. Lucy had mentioned those before.

"Yup! Purple and white."

"Of course." Bickslow knew how much Lucy liked the lilies.

For the most part, the wedding that Lucy wanted didn't require much planning at all. It was going to be behind the guild, just on the grass, and a lot of the guild members had already offered to help where they could. Laki was building a large canopy frame that was going to be covered with large sheets on the day, and it was going to be big enough to fit most of the tables, as well as a small dance floor. Droy was going to go overboard on the vines and greenery. Cana was going to deal with ordering most of the alcohol, just because she'd claimed to be able to get a good price on it. And then Warren, Max, Nab, and a few others had offered to get there early in the morning to get everything set up.

If it hadn't been a guild wedding, Evergreen knew that Lucy would be having to rush a whole lot more than she currently was to get everything sorted. At that point though, the only big thing that needed sorted out was the dress, which was going to be dealt with when she got back from her job.

As far as what Bickslow needed to sort out, however… "How about you though?" Evergreen asked. "Have you chosen your groomsmen yet? Or picked out the rings? What about a suit?"

Bickslow looked up, blinking slowly as he stared to Evergreen still in the bathroom. "…Uh, not yet, nope, and no."

Evergreen's sigh was so loud that Bickslow heard it clearly from where he stood. "Bicks…"

"What? I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to do." That was also partly why he'd left it all to Lucy. Bickslow genuinely had no idea about any of it. He'd kind of just expected Lucy to remind him to do those things…

"Well, you could at least hurry up and choose who your groomsmen and best man will be."

"Why? It's not like they do anything. Why do I have to choose them so early?"

"Oh my god." Evergreen balled her hands into fists at her sides, and exhaled through her nose. Oh, if only she had her fan still… Bickslow was more than deserving of a few slaps from it right then. Calmly, Evergreen said, "Bickslow, they're not just there to look pretty. At least not most of the time. The best man specifically is supposed to help you choose your tux, and he keeps the rings so people like _you_ don't lose them. And they plan your bachelor party, too."

Bickslow groaned. If he'd known getting married involved that much work, he probably wouldn't have bothered proposing. Although… That was a lie. It was Lucy, after all, so he had to _marry_ her. Still, there was just way too much work involved.

"Fine, fine…" he mumbled. Thankfully though, two of the men he'd been planning on having as his groomsmen were in his kitchen at that very moment. Dropping an old alarm clock into the box on his bed, Bickslow went to go find Freed and Laxus still emptying the cupboards in the kitchen, just to announce, "Ever's on my back about choosing groomsmen. You two are groomsmen. Okay? Deal?"

Laxus only gave a shrug. "Well, I figured as much."

Freed gave a small smile in agreement. "I assumed you would leave it until later, but yes, it was fairly obvious you would ask."

Bickslow shook his head. Stupid Ever. Freed and Laxus had the right idea. He was going to ask Gajeel as well, or maybe even Gray or Natsu if Gajeel didn't want to, but Bickslow would do that later. The issue of the best man, of course… It was down to Laxus or Freed, that was something Bickslow knew for certain just because they were like his brothers, but Bickslow wasn't quite sure who to choose.

He looked between Laxus and Freed, both of them staring back at him with looks of confusion. But then Bickslow focused on Freed, and said, "Freed, you're my best man."

"Eh? What about me?" Laxus asked.

"Freed is more responsible."

Laxus considered it for a moment as Freed gave a small shrug, and then sighed and pulled a stack of plates down. "Fair point."

"Well, I'd be honoured, Bickslow," Freed said.

"Great. Glad we got that sorted out." Bickslow nodded once before turning on his heels for his bedroom. "Ever, are you fucking happy now?" he shouted.

"Extremely," Evergreen replied.

* * *

Checking Lucy's sketches one last time to make sure he'd put the furniture in _mostly_ the right places, Bickslow left to meet Lucy at the train station. They'd talked on the communications lacrima a few days earlier, just so Bickslow had been able to ask Lucy to call him when she was nearly back in Magnolia so he would know when to meet her.

Getting everything into the new house had been a little tricky, but Bickslow had managed to pull it off. Laxus had only been able to help on the first day, but Freed and Evergreen had helped him for the rest of the week. The last three days had been spent unpacking everything after moving all of the furniture over, and if it was one thing Bickslow had quickly realised as he'd been moving the furniture around and getting it into place, it was that he didn't have _enough_ furniture.

But, that had been expected anyway, since the house was a whole lot bigger than the apartment.

He got to the station just a few minutes before Lucy's train arrived. Even in the shade by the tracks, Bickslow felt the sweat form on his brow. Summer had well and truly arrived in Magnolia, and it wasn't fun. Thankfully, he didn't have to wait long before Lucy's train arrived and she piled out of the carriage with the rest of her team and passengers.

She stretched her arms above her head as she stepped out onto the platform, following behind Erza. "It's good to be back," Lucy groaned, finally dropping her arms back down to her sides.

"That was a long one," Gray mumbled.

"Yes, but it was rather rewarding, don't you think?" Erza said. It hadn't paid very much, but it had still been a great experience. A team that gets kidnapped together and thrown in an alligator pit together, is a team that stays together.

Natsu finally staggered out of the train and joined them on the platform just to mumble, "No. It wasn't rewarding at all. You're fucking crazy, Erza." Even he had his limits, and he'd reached one.

Erza sighed and shook her head. "We'll have to agree to disagree," she said. "Anyway, shall we head to the guild now?"

"Nah, I need to go home and shower," Gray said, lifting his hand from his pocket just to wave back to them. "Catch you guys later."

Lucy smiled apologetically as she sidestepped away from her team. She'd seen Bickslow when she'd gotten off the train, and as much as she loved her team, she didn't really want to make him wait any longer than necessary. "Bicks is already here, so I'm going to head home with him," she said.

Not even Natsu was heading towards the guild that evening, and so when everyone went off in their separate ways, even Erza decided to just head home herself, too. The bath at Fairy Hills would most likely be free, and even she needed to relax occasionally.

When Lucy reached Bickslow, she looped her arms around the back of his neck just to stand on her toes and press a soft kiss to his lips. "I missed you," she murmured. "Were you waiting long? It's hot out here." It had been a little cooler on the western coast, where her job had taken her, but Magnolia just felt stickier in comparison.

"I missed you too. And no, not long. Just a few minutes."

"Good." Their fingers threaded together between them as they slowly walked back through the gates of the station and out onto the street. It was that time of day where it was still light, but there was just the hint of an orange glow all around to warn of the impending sunset. It was Lucy's favourite time of day, right after the calm that always came before the sun rose in the morning. "So, why did you want to come meet me?" Lucy asked as they walked.

Bickslow shrugged. "Figured I'd still be around and have nothing else to do, so I thought it'd be nice to meet you there so we could walk home together," he lied.

Lucy had a feeling it wasn't the truth, but she'd play along anyway. "How kind of you to spend time with me when you have nothing else to do," she teased, just to get an eye-roll and a gentle nudge from her fiancé. "Well, do you want to go pick up something to eat before we get home?"

"Nope. I'm cooking."

"Excuse me? You? Cooking?"

"Oh, come on. It's not surprising."

"Bicks, honey. I love you, but you don't cook. You _can't_ cook either," Lucy said, trying not to laugh.

"You're the one who bought me a cook book for Christmas," Bickslow reminded her. "And I'm not that bad, thank you very much. I'm getting better." He'd only smoked out the kitchen in the new house once while Lucy had been gone. That was a new record for him.

Lucy rolled her eyes. She had to admit that the few times Bickslow had cooked, the food had actually tasted pretty nice. Practice definitely does make perfect in Bickslow's case. "Fine. You're getting better. But what's on the menu for tonight then?"

"It's a secret."

"You haven't decided yet, have you?"

Bickslow hesitated, glancing down at her and then back to the street so he didn't tree or walk into someone. "I… have decided," he eventually said. "It involves a salad. I know that much."

"And what else?"

"Okay, so I haven't _completely_ decided on dinner yet, but—hey, stop laughing!"

Lucy couldn't help herself. He was just so completely ridiculous without even trying to be sometimes, but she loved it all the same. Bickslow wouldn't be himself unless he was ridiculous and sweet all at the same time. "I'm sorry," she giggled. She noticed Bickslow's pout, but it didn't last long anyway. "But, wait… Why are we going this way? The apartment is in the opposite direction." Bickslow had been leading them and Lucy hadn't really paid much attention to the streets they'd actually been walking on, but now that she was paying attention, she realised that they were probably closer to the house than the apartment.

His lips turned up into a knowing smile as he pulled her down yet another street. He had been wondering if she'd catch on eventually. He was just surprised it had taken that long. "You'll see," was all Bickslow said.

A few minutes later, they arrived out the front of the house and Bickslow reached into his pocket to grab the keys to unlock the door. Lucy had already suspected that Bickslow was taking her to the house instead of the apartment, so she wasn't surprised to end up there. What did surprise Lucy though, was instantly seeing the furniture from the apartment in the rooms that had been empty the last time she'd seen them.

"What… What did you do?"

Bickslow shuffled on his feet as Lucy darted into the living room on her left, before coming back out into the hall to rush into the dining room, looking around at how everything seemed to be in the perfect place. "Well, that wasn't exactly the reaction I was hoping for…" Bickslow mumbled. Lucy was just more shocked than anything, and while it made sense, Bickslow had just been hoping for a little more _excitement_. He'd worked hard, damn it. "And… I moved us in during the week."

"You did?"

He finally followed her into the next room, shrugging when Lucy turned back around. "Everything was finished here, and I found those drawings you did so I asked my team to help me get everything over here to surprise you."

Squealing, Lucy ran straight towards Bickslow just to jump up and throw her arms around him. "You moved us?! We live here now?!"

"Well, yeah…"

She kissed him firmly on the lips once, holding his face between her hands. "God, I love you! I love you so damn much, oh my god. I… Bicks…" At a loss for words, she just kissed him again before managing to put herself back on her feet and going to explore the house some more.

Lucy had been more than excited to finally get moved into the house. She knew it had been getting the finishing touches added over the last few weeks and it had basically been ready for them to move in to, but the whole moving process had been going so slowly that Lucy honestly hadn't known when they'd be able to live there. She'd hoped they'd manage it before the wedding, but Bickslow had gone and done it all by himself while she'd been gone and she couldn't be happier.

The boxes were a little annoying to see, and all the empty spaces on the walls were just as bad, but that was fine. Lucy was definitely looking forward to being able to really turn it into a home though, because it just wasn't quite there yet.

Bickslow only watched Lucy bounce around from room to room, squealing like some kind of child who was getting to visit Ryuzetzu Land for the first time ever. It was exciting for him just to see how excited Lucy was, and it made his tiring week worth it.

* * *

Lucy's birthday party ended up doubling as a housewarming party, and it had been completely accidental. Lucy hadn't even wanted a party at all, but Bickslow had insisted on having a little celebration with just a few people since it was her twenty-first and it was kind of a milestone. Unfortunately, their small get-together ended up turning in a full-blown party when half the guild invited themselves. Fortunately, though, they had the room to host that many people, now that they'd settled into the house and gotten everything organised and unpacked. They'd even bought a bit more furniture to fill in some of the spaces and make it cosier.

Seeing Bickslow slink away from the awkward game Cana had started at the dining table, Lucy followed him over to the kitchen where he began to fix himself a drink. "Do you want me to make you one?" Bickslow asked when he noticed her.

Lucy shook her head, coming up behind Bickslow just to wrap her arms around his middle and rest her cheek against the back of his shoulder. "No thank you. I'm good for now."

"Are you enjoying yourself then?"

"I guess so…" While she enjoyed her friends being there and celebrating with her, _socialising_ just wasn't what Lucy would've preferred to be doing that night, especially since it happened to be _that_ time of the month again. Simply, Lucy just had better things to be doing. Specifically, her fiancé. "I just hope they all go home soon…" she murmured.

"How come?" Bickslow asked, putting the cap back on the bottle before lifting his glass up to his mouth to take a sip.

"Because I want you to fuck me until cum is dripping down my legs."

Bickslow had to cover his mouth with his hand before he spat his drink out everywhere. It wasn't exactly the first time Lucy had said something along those lines, but it was definitely the first time she'd said it while there were other people around them. And judging by the stunned look Gajeel was suddenly giving him from across the room, Bickslow wasn't the only one who had heard Lucy's words.

He didn't even need to try and glance back to Lucy behind him to know she had the most wicked of smirks on her lips, and Bickslow figured it was probably a good thing that he didn't need to see it to know it was there. Just the words and the mental image that came with it were making him just a little too turned on for his comfort, especially considering they had guests. Seeing that kind of smile would probably just be pushing Bickslow into kicking every single person out just so he _could_ go and make his fiancée and very, _very_ happy woman.

For the time being though… Bickslow wasn't going to do that. Lucy could be patient for once.

Clearing his throat, and well aware that his face was the same shade of red as the roses sitting in a vase on the bench, Bickslow slowly unfolded Lucy's arms from around his waist to pull himself free. "W-Well, uh… Okay. I definitely wasn't expecting _that_ answer, but… Uh… Let's get a raincheck on that. You know, until later. When people _aren't_ here."

Lucy couldn't help but giggle quietly to herself as Bickslow ran away to talk to someone who wouldn't purposely try and turn him on.

Apparently, that person ended up being Gajeel, who only muttered, "You totally ruined her."

Bickslow had no intentions of disagreeing. He had, without a doubt, been the worst influence ever on Lucy. But she'd been a great influence on him so he liked to think it evened out.

* * *

Lucy stared at the back of Bickslow's head for a good five minutes when she woke up the next morning. She had a busy day ahead of her, getting her dress fitted and then going to choose the bridesmaid dresses too. As far as Lucy could tell, she'd still be fertile for another day or so, so even if there was still time to try and get pregnant for that cycle, Lucy still preferred to try as much as she could, almost _whenever_ she could.

She just wasn't one for wasting opportunities.

But, while Bickslow was hungover (or so Lucy suspected, judging by how much he'd had to drink the night before), he was just going to stay in bed all day and do nothing. Lucy didn't really care about that, though. He could sleep literally all day for all Lucy cared, as long as he woke up and helped her first. Because, strangely enough, she did actually need him in order to get pregnant.

If she could do it on her own, then she probably would have.

Sliding forward finally, Lucy pressed herself right up against his back and let her lips trail over the back of his neck. "Bicks…" she whispered. "Are you going to wake up?"

Bickslow groaned into the pillow, just an acknowledgement of the fact that he had heard her.

"Come on, wake up," Lucy giggled. She sat up on an elbow as her other hand lightly trailed up his spine under his shirt, just barely grazing the raised scar on his back before brushing over the matching scar on his stomach. "I know you can hear me…"

Oh, he could definitely hear her. He probably would've been quite happy just mostly ignoring her and going back to sleep too, but then her hand slipped into his boxer shorts and wrapped around the base his shaft, and Bickslow had to actually move to push Lucy's hand out and away. "Not now," he mumbled.

Lucy was just a little surprised that Bickslow was actually turning her down, because it was probably the first time he had ever done so in the nearly two years that they'd actually been together all up. But, she was convincing herself not to read into it too much. He's just grumpy and tried. That's it. It wasn't like she hadn't dealt with that before anyway.

Still, Lucy was persistent. "Bicks, come on," she laughed again. "You know that I'm—"

"Seriously, Lucy, stop it. I'm not in the mood." He pushed Lucy's hand back when it crossed his side again, and made a point of rolling onto his stomach just to avoid her.

It had all been fine until Lucy had decided she wanted to really try and make the whole baby thing happen. But since then, it had just been getting progressively worse. The only time Lucy seemed to want to have sex those days, was during that brief window where she had the highest chance of actually getting pregnant. Bickslow hadn't really minded it at first, just because it hadn't been so bad and he'd occasionally be able to talk her into fucking him _other_ times.

But now? Now it was just whenever Lucy wanted, and Bickslow hated it. He'd honestly never thought that he'd see the day where he actually hated sex. But Lucy had turned it into a chore, and it wasn't fun anymore. He was _tired_ , and he was sick of being woken up every morning for half a week straight just to fuck her.

That time though, Lucy did take it personally, and she sat back quickly. It surprisingly hurt, and Lucy knew it shouldn't, because she knew it wasn't a big deal. But it still hurt.

"Oh. Um… Okay. Sorry…" Lucy whispered, pulling herself out of bed to just get on with her morning.

Try as Bickslow might, Bickslow couldn't just go back to sleep. He knew he'd somehow managed to offend Lucy by saying no (honestly, how, he had no idea), and he couldn't just leave it. He had to go sort Lucy out before she started assuming that he wasn't attracted to her anymore or something stupid like that, because with the way her thought processes worked, Bickslow knew it was bound to happen.

She was weird like that.

With a heavy sigh, Bickslow kicked back the blanket and sluggishly pulled himself out of bed. He really would love to just lie back down and sleep his slight hangover off, but Lucy was _slightly_ more important than getting some more sleep. Besides, sleep could come later. He could hear the shower running before he even got into the bathroom, and when he walked in, Lucy only stuck her head around the shower curtain for a moment before she ducked back inside the shower and ignored him. She continued to ignore him even when he stepped into the shower behind her.

He couldn't just say he wasn't in the mood for anything and then get in the shower with her five minutes later. It didn't work that way.

"Lucy, I'm sorry," Bickslow said softly.

"Why are you apologising? It's fine. Don't worry about it," Lucy responded, finishing rinsing out the shampoo and reaching for the conditioner next.

Bickslow reached around her to set the bottle back on the shelf. "Well, it isn't fine. I know that." Still, he thought it was weird that it was like that at all but he wasn't going to say that to Lucy. "Because I know that it upset you and I didn't mean to do that."

Lucy gave a small shrug as she turned around slowly, just so she didn't slip and fall in the tub. She felt stupid for letting it bother her at all, but Bickslow saying he was sorry just seemed to make her feel worse.

His hands clasped behind Lucy's waist just to pull her towards him, ducking down to press a soft kiss to the top of her head and making his lips just a little numb from the apple shampoo she was supposedly using that week. "Baby, I love you, and I know how badly you want to be pregnant, but… You've kind of ruined sex lately. You've taken all the fun from it," Bickslow admitted, wincing only slightly because he knew how horribly Lucy was going to take it.

"How can I? Am I… bad?" she whispered.

"Oh. God no. Trust me, you're fine."

"But you just said I ruined it…"

Bickslow let out a quiet sigh before he asked, "Have you noticed that the only time we sleep together now is when you want to, because you think it's the right time to conceive and all that?"

"What? No it's not. We do it all the time."

"Nope."

"Come on, of course we do," Lucy insisted. Bickslow had to be dreaming or something. Although as Lucy thought about it, which was difficult since it wasn't exactly like she kept an internal log for each time they did have sex, she could see that, perhaps, Bickslow was onto something. She looked away in her embarrassment just to mumble, "W-Well, it can't be the _only_ time we sleep together…"

"Yup. It is."

"No. Can't be."

"Never used to be," Bickslow said. "But for the last couple of months it has been."

Lucy just really hadn't noticed. But, she could see why Bickslow would say she'd managed to take all the fun out of it. And, admittedly, Lucy knew she'd probably be just as frustrated if Bickslow had done the same thing to her, even if it was over something as stupid as how often they slept together.

"I didn't know that I was doing that… I'm sorry," Lucy murmured.

Bickslow gave a small shrug. "I assumed you didn't. But it's not a big deal anyway. It's fine." Now that Lucy knew what she'd been doing, Bickslow didn't really have anything to worry about. And, really, he knew all of it could've been avoided if he'd just gotten over himself and fucked her, but he liked to think that actually saying no for a change had been a good thing.

"But… It is kind of a big deal. I feel horrible."

"Honestly, Lucy, don't worry about it. Just forget I said anything."

Lucy shook her head and carefully pulled herself free slightly. "No, I'm glad you told me," she said. "But I just… I feel as if I was almost _using_ you…" It wasn't a pleasant feeling to say the least, and if Bickslow hadn't told her how he saw things, then Lucy knew she probably would've just kept doing what she'd been doing.

"Come on, you weren't _using_ me," Bickslow sighed. "And even if you were, I'm pretty sure trying to get knocked up is a pretty good reason to do so." He paused for a moment, brows creasing as he grimaced and added, "Actually, that is pretty creepy when you think about it."

"See! Even you think it's bad."

He sighed again and pulled Lucy back towards him. "Lucy, it's fine. Really. Stop worrying about it. It was… It was an accident. It's fine."

"I guess so…" Lucy mumbled after a moment. She supposed Bickslow was right. There was no point in worrying about something she hadn't even known she was doing, and it had already happened so it wasn't like there was much she could do.

Still, she was thankful that Bickslow had even told her, because she knew all too well that he had a habit of keeping smaller details from her if he thought it'd keep her happy. And as much as Lucy wanted a baby already, she didn't really want it under those circumstances, where she felt like she was just using Bickslow for her own gain. As silly as it all was, Lucy still hated it.

"Good. Glad we got that sorted out." Bickslow pressed another quick kiss to the top of her head, and then reached back around Lucy for the conditioner bottle to hand it to her. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to bed."

"Fine…" Truthfully, it didn't even surprise Lucy. If she thought about it, she was more surprised that Bickslow had even bothered getting out of bed to talk to her about it all in the first place. She already had the conditioner in her palm and had been about to massage it into her scalp before she remembered that Bickslow's family would be visiting in another week. "Oh! Wait!" Lucy stuck her head back around the shower curtain just as Bickslow picked up his clothes from the bathroom floor. "Don't forget that you need to put together the beds this week," she said.

Bickslow groaned at the reminder. He'd definitely forgotten that, not that he was entirely sure how. "Right, yeah… Later…" he mumbled on his way back out of the bathroom. Sleep was more important right then. Putting together a couple of day beds for his _niblings_ would be a reasonably simple task, at least with the help of the babies, but that was only once he'd gotten a few more hours of sleep.

* * *

" _Mm_ , yes… Right there…" Lucy could only let out a gasping breath as Bickslow's tongue delved deeper into her core. She would've let out more than that had Bickslow's nephews and niece not been asleep just down the hall, and with the door open no less. But since they were asleep, Lucy was just having to settle for keeping a little quieter than usual.

She wouldn't have had to bother at all if Bickslow could keep his hands (or, perhaps more accurately, his mouth) to himself, but it wasn't like Lucy was much better herself.

She had to bite her lip when his hand circled around her hip just to rub tight circles over her clit. Another sharp breath and Lucy lifted her head with the intentions of peeking back down to Bickslow under the sheet and between her legs, but movement in the corner of her eyes caught her attention first and she saw the bedroom door swing the rest of way open to reveal Layla in the doorway, rubbing her eyes with one hand and holding onto one of the babies in her other.

"Aunt Lucy?" she whispered.

Lucy would've brought her legs back together if she hadn't had Bickslow's head still between them. Thankfully, the sheet kept her (and Bickslow) more than covered. "L-Layla? What are you… What are you doing up?" Lucy asked, scrambling to sit up and keep what was left of her dignity intact. If Saskia and Xander heard that Layla had walked in on them, then they'd definitely never be able to babysit the children again.

"Where's Uncle Pixie?" Layla asked quietly in turn.

Bickslow was quick to peek his head up from under the sheets, only after managing to carefully pull the bottom of Lucy's nightgown back down over her hips. "Here, Layls." The childlike interest on his niece's face only made him grimace and rack his brain for some kind of explanation. "I was, just, uh… Helping Aunt Lucy find an earring she lost!"

Lucy's hand flew up to one ear, where her small studs were still sitting. "R-Right! Yes! He's found it now so not to worry." Lucy could only praise her fiancé's quick-thinking skills as Layla seemed to accept the explanation. Now all Lucy hoped was that she didn't mention it to her parents. "Did you have a bad dream, Layla?" Lucy asked softly then, turning her attention back to the issue at hand. The girl gave a small nod and Lucy sighed quietly to herself before she pulled herself out of bed as quickly and as carefully as she could manage, then reached for Layla's hand once she was at the door to lead her back out into the hall. "How about I heat up some milk for you and read you a story then."

It didn't take very long for Lucy to get Layla back to bed, but it had been difficult since she hadn't wanted to wake Jasper and Damian up in the process. Thankfully, the boys slept like logs and hadn't so much as stirred when Lucy had been tucking Layla back into bed and reading her a short bedtime story.

Pushing the door almost all the way closed, Lucy returned to her own bed where Bickslow was sitting up and waiting for her with an almost smug smirk on his face. "Did you get her to fall asleep?" he asked as he slid down beside Lucy once she'd climbed under the sheet again, and he made himself comfortable.

"Mm-hmm, I did. The boys are still completely out too, thankfully," Lucy murmured. "Now, tell me what that smirk is about."

Bickslow shrugged as best he could with Lucy shifting to rest on his shoulder. "I'm just thinking about how great of a mother you're going to be when we have our own kids." It wasn't the first time he'd thought it, but after watching her with his nephews and niece for most of the day, he was convinced of it. She was kind and she was caring and any child they did have, whenever that may be, was going to be completely adored and Bickslow knew that Lucy would do her best to offer them the world.

He'd do it too, of course, but the thought that Lucy would do that was far more appealing.

"And you're going to be a great father."

"Yeah, maybe, but… I still think you'll be amazing at it," he insisted. "You're good with them. The kids, I mean. Especially with Layla. And I keep thinking about how you'll be with our kids one day, and I just… I really love it."

Lucy smiled softly to herself before she sat up slightly just to press a gentle kiss to Bickslow's cheek. "I know you do," she whispered. She had to admit that she'd enjoyed having Layla and the twins there that day, and as chaotic as it had been at some points (like, when she'd had to try and get Jasper and Damien to _not_ eat the petals off the flowers she'd been planting in the garden with their help), it had all made her long for her own family all the more. "But… Who knows, maybe we got lucky this time…" It was already the end of July, so Lucy wouldn't even be surprised if it ended up being yet another month where she wasn't pregnant, but she had to have some kind of faith that it would happen at some point.

There was no just point in trying if she gave up.

"Yeah, maybe," Bickslow agreed. He was beginning to have his own doubts, but he still hoped they'd get there.

* * *

Bickslow's sisters had already returned back to Crocus before August came around. It had been a short trip, but since they'd all be returning for the wedding at the end of the month, no one had expected them to stay for long anyway.

Soon after, Bickslow left for what he supposed to be his last mission before the wedding, which left Lucy free to clean and organise the house to her heart's content. It had been a tradition of hers since she'd been living on her own to take at least one day of every month, usually towards the beginning, to deep clean and get everything in order. Having lived in the new house for a little while, there wasn't a lot that needed to be done, but that didn't stop Lucy from working through her usual list of chores anyway.

She started with the washing, getting all of the sheets and quilt covers and pillowcases in the house washed and hung out in the sun to dry. Next, she swept, and then it was onto dusting every single shelf and surface in the whole house. She even took items off shelves just to make sure everything had been touched. She watered the garden and planted the last of the flowers in the small flowerbeds, and went through every cupboard in the kitchen just so she could write a detailed shopping list, complete with the number of new storage containers she'd need to pick up just so she could have everything neatly arranged in the pantry.

It was only after she'd gone and done the shopping, gotten everything packed away in the pantry and the fridge, and then folded and sorted the washing, that Lucy had the chance to sit down and take a break. It didn't last for long though, because she still had things on her list that needed to get done.

So, she headed to her large desk between the bookshelves with a rubbish bag in one hand, and sat herself down to get back to work. Old letters, drafts, and bills that had been stacked in the corner or in one of the drawers all went into the bin. The empty glasses and cups were carried to the kitchen to be washed later. She refilled the ink in the inkwell and set it back on the shelf where it belonged, right next to the rainbow quill that she thought was too pretty to actually use. She even managed to get all of her notes for her novel in a somewhat logical order, but she'd written them out so haphazardly that it still wasn't perfect. And once her desk had been tidied and was neat again, she set aside the nearly over-flowing bag of crumpled up paper just to pull out the small desk calendar and get all of her appointments and dates for the next month in order.

But, it was as Lucy was figuring out the dates for her next fertile window with the intention of marking them down on the page, that she realised something: she was already four days late, and that had only ever happened once before.

* * *

 _Still kind of a filler chapter, I suppose, but it was really just because I had to get through like nine months within the storyline and I didn't want to just skip it all. I guess that's why this story is as long as it is, because I like writing everything, even if it's just a small scene where nothing really happens._

 _I'll try and get APS updated after BixCo Week if anyone was curious about that. I have a few more assignments to work on over the next few weeks though, so at this point I'm not even sure if I'll get the last few BixCo Week stories done, at least not without making my grades suffer a little..._

 _Anyway. Reviews are always appreciated._ _  
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